“Dad!”
Resting his hand firmly on the door handle, the elder man turned back to face the dark room that but a few minutes ago was empty. “Sunset?” he said replied, “What are you doing up at this hour. I thought you would sleep in?”
Making her way through the living room, illuminated by the riding sun ray that broke through the window, she spoke up “I woke up to get a cup of water.” She answered her father. “Are you going to work?”
He let out a sigh of defeat, “yeah, sadly…” he said with a warm smile, receiving a soft giggle. “Will you be going out with your friends today?” he asked.
Sunset nodded, “Yeah, we plan on going to the mall later.”
Sunset’s father smiled warmly at the thought, he couldn’t help but to comment, “To imagine, it was just a year ago that you were all dark and brooding; acting like you were some kind of ‘demon’,” he chuckled at his little joke.
Sunset chuckled to, but hurt could be heard, “Yeah…” she replied, a hint of pain in her voice.
“But look at you now, my little Sunset,” her father continued, “So bright and cheery, so full of love and compassion. It is like you and that person are two totally different people. Those friends of yours were probably the best thing to happen.”
“Yeah…” Sunset replied, her voice never perking up, try as she must she couldn’t hide the hurt. Sunset’s father picked up on this.
Moving away from the door, man made his way to his daughter. Getting down on one knee, he placed his hands on either side of her arms arm. Turning her gaze downward, she saw a man with the warmest smile.
“Honey,” Sunset’s father said, his eyes focused upward at his daughter’s face – showing her that he would never look down at her. “No matter what others say, you must know this. You are, and never were, a ‘demon.’” He said softly, yet sternly, as if speaking to a small child, “You are, now and forever, my little angel. And nothing you will ever do is going to change the fact that I love you with all of my heart.” he reached out with his hand to rub away a small tear that had started to accumulate on his daughter’s cheek – showing her that ‘Daddy’ will always be there for her.
Sunset shivered a bit under her father’s warm red touch, but she returned his smile with one of her own – this time, the pain seemed to have all but been diminished. “Thanks dad…” she said softly. She loved this man deeply.
Sunset’s father returned her smile with another of his own. He sighed with a bit of a happy tone. “You are getting so big and beautiful.” He couldn’t help but comment on his daughter’s appearance. “The more I see, the more you are getting to look more and more like your mother every day.” To imagine for him was painful, it felt like it was only just yesterday that his daughter was running through the house in her training pants calling herself a pretty, pretty princess.
The mood was shot. Sunset turned her gaze away from the man that never looked down on her – not daring to look him in the eye.
Her father chocked up a sigh, somethings are still so painful. He still wondered had it not been for his wife’s untimely accident that took her away from her family a couple of years, would Sunset not have isolated herself as much as she did?
“If your mother were here right now,” still, he continued on, “She would be so proud of you!” he smiled.
Still, Sunset didn’t dare to return the same compassion this man showed her.
Sunset’s father gave his daughter a cheerful shake. “Hey!” he said in a playful tone. “I have a wonderful idea. How about after work tonight I stop by the, “Sugar Dunk on the Corner” on my way home and pick up a couple of dozen doughnuts. We can just stay at home tonight, pig out on them and watch a movie. What do you think? Sound like a date?”
The mood didn’t change, but Sunset did lift her gaze to look her father back in the eye, “Y-yeah…that sounds nice…” she said softly with a small smile - a fake smile.
Her father smiled back, “That’s my little ‘sunset.’”
“Sunset” what a weird name to give to a child, Sunset Shimmer would often wonder. In her world it made sense, but here, these names that were given never seemed to have any form of rhyme or reason behind them.
Her father once told her that her name probably stuck to his mind since the early days that he and her mother were dating. One of their favorite things to do was just to watch the sun set into the night sky together, just enjoying one another’s company.
Though her father did tell her that the reason he chose her name, was that on the day she was born, it was the way he saw her. He saw her as someone that after a long day, a hard day of pain and back breaking work, he wanted to come home at the end of it all to see her, a glow in the night that reminded him that there is still something left before everything all goes dark. He told her that she was his “little sunset” and that there was nowhere else in this world that he would rather be at the end of the day, than to be with her.
It was an interesting way to name someone in this world, different from her world – she often wondered if others here often had their own special meaning behind their name that differed from back in Equestria.
But still…
Seeing her dad off for the day, Sunset Shimmer watched as her father drove down the ever brightening day, with promises of doughnuts that waited for her that night.
She shook her head with a laugh as she turned away shutting the door behind her. She couldn’t help but believe that man was something else entirely out of this world.
Still…
Still it was still way too early for her liking.
Sunset enjoyed sleeping in, who in their right mind wouldn’t?
Perhaps it was since her days of studies with Princess Celestia that her biological clock has been programmed that waking up at a certain point meant that she was going to be up for the rest of that day, and now that only lying in bed meant for to be staring at the ceiling for hours. Nothing said education like waking up at 4 in the morning to make your report about the “Don’t-you-dare-daffa-dilly-dally” plants that would only show up at certain point in the morning.
But still…
Sunset Shimmer grabbed herself a cup of water from the kitchen and made her way back into the living room and the couch.
With a bit of a bounce, she got herself comfortable as she placed her cup on a coaster, reaching for the television remote on the coffee table. Turning on the TV she was suddenly enveloped by the strangest of magic.
Technology. Sunset was way impressed with the technology from this world. Much further ahead here than back in Equestria, if you were to bring any ponies to this world truly they would see this world as far more magical place than that of the world that they reign from.
Sunset Shimmer giggled to herself at that little comment. Coming to this world, and powerless she had found herself almost completely crushed under the weight of this world’s technology. It was scary.
Still, it made her laugh. To imagine a megalomaniac trying to enslave the entire world, but still didn’t know how to set the time on a VCR.
“You are, and never were, a ‘demon.’”
But still…
“You are, now and forever, my little angel”
What is a demon, if only just an angel?
“You are getting to look more and more like your mother with every passing day.”
Sunset turned her gaze away from the glowing light of the tv and unto the wall of the den. Aligned the walls were several photos. A couple laid out was that of her and her friends. There was one with Twilight. There was a second with the other. Others laid out contained images of Sunset Shimmer growing up as a child, and those that contained portraits of her family.
“If your mother were here right now, she would be so proud of you!”
There in the middle laid a still portrait of a man and woman and their little girl, all three of them filled with love and happiness for the world – for one another.
Sunset couldn’t help but smile.
But still…
“WHAT DID YOU DO WITH HER?! WHERE IS MY DAUGHTER!!!??!?”
That’s right!
Pain!
Pain tore through Sunset Shimmer center, both physical and mental. She doubled over the coffee table, clutching her chest. It felt like her heart itself was trying to tear its way out of her chest cavity.
This wasn’t right, none of this was right.
Sunset gaze went back over at the television, aligning the wall above it stood even more photos. Among the many, there was one that stuck out the most. It was one of a father and daughter, Sunset remembered the day she took that photo with her father this past year – it was a father’s day present.
Next to that one, acting aas a pair to the first was an image of Sunset Shimmer and her mother from a few years ago, a present she was told was a gift for mother’s day.
“WHO ARE YOU!??!?!?”
Sunset Shimmer clutched her head. Memories of a past that she wished to forget trying to split her head wide open. She wanted to forget. She needed to forget. Ignorance was bliss.
But she could never forget. And why should she?
Breathing becoming erratic and heavy, tears started to stream down Sunset’s face.
She still remembered.
The day her mother died in that “accident.”
But still, Sunset wanted to forget.
Bearing the pain, she tried to look around her. With the room illuminated by the flashing lights on the television in front of her, she needed to remember.
This place wasn’t her home. This place was her self-imposed prison. This was a world that she had created. It was the only world that she belonged in.
All a demon is, is just an Angel.
But still…
Bzzzt. Bzzzt. Bzzzt.
There it was. The alarm went off, like every morning. At this time, right on the dot.
It was breakfast time.
Sunset Shimmer wiped the tears from her face. She hated what she had done, but still she needed to continue on – If not for herself, she needed to do it for them.
Sunset Shimmer wasn’t exactly a morning person; she wasn’t someone that would find herself hungry at this time of day – for her, something even as much as a bagel would have been too much on her stomach.
But still this wasn’t for her.
They say that “Home is where the heart is.” Home is her imprisonment; her heart is in her cage. To Sunset Shimmer, it felt as if she was homesick and yet here she was – she was in a home that loved her very much. She received love, but she never deserved any of it, not after she has done.
No wait. Yeah, she did deserve it. She deserved every little bit she had gotten.
It didn’t matter how many times she has saved the world. Sunset had destroyed this one little world, and there was no way she could repent for it.
She would never be able to deserve their forgiveness.
But still…
Sunset Shimmer poured herself a glass of orange juice, and with that it was all finished. Some sunny side up eggs. A few strips of bacon. A couple of biscuits. And Some grits. It was all a little heavy for her taste, but still…
But still…
Carrying the tray of food in both hands, Shimmer returned back to the living room and made her way to the doorway that lead to the basement. Flickering on the light with her shoulder; she slowly started making her way down the stairs - careful not spill anything from her plate.
Her father used to be an artist; Sunset remembered the days when he would come down to the basement just to spend hours on end with his easel. But he stopped one day, ever since…
He probably is just in denial. He knows what yo-
Ever since her mother’s accident, Sunset Shimmer was the one that came down to the basement – she was the one that would come down here and retrieve the Halloween and Christmas decorations for the two of them to put up. Her father would never step foot down here.
But still…
The room was all but silent, only the sound of the air conditioner echoing as it roared to life. The room itself was bare, a few boxes here and there but there was no sign of life. There was nowhere else for her to go. Sunset Shimmer found herself alone in the basement.
Placing the tray of food on one of the boxes, Sunset made her way over to one side of the room. A small shelf lined up against the wall, a few tools topped the steel shelf, but still, nothing of importance. Carefully, she started to push, soon to be followed by the ear splitting scrapping of metal against the hard concrete floor. In mere moments the old raggedy steel shelf had been removed, revealing to the world what secret it had kept hidden - a wooden door.
Sunset Shimmer, for a moment, stood there just looking at the door frame. She hated every moment that would happen, but still she knew she had to do it.
But still…
Picking up the tray of food, she returned to the wooden door. For a moment she just stared - her very breath catching in her throat. She discovered this little extra room in the basement three years ago, soon after she had arrived into this world. She was shown this room by her.
But still…
Still, Sunset Shimmer had to push forward. So she pushed onward opening the door. She tried her best to put on her best expression.
“Good mooooorning!” Sunset came into the room, glee in her voice, a bit of pep in her step – something she picked up from Pinkie Pie.
She was given no response. That of course was no surprise.
Still, she had to try. “I brought you breakfast!” Sunset spoke, putting more radiance into her approach. She was hoping that this morning, that she was going to have a break through
But of course she knew better. Why would any of this be any different?
Within these mere moments, all form of hope left Sunset’s face…nothing she would do was going to fix anything. To fix any of this.
But still…
Sunset moved to the middle of the room, placing the tray of food down on the ground. She knew that she would get to the food when she wanted to; there was no way that she could force herself to eat.
But still…
But still, it was something else. Looking into the corner of the room, it was still an odd sensation to see her. To imagine that behind your reflection laid out other worlds. Some different in small ways. Some different on a much larger scale. Still, they reflected off the same life.
Still, it was such a surreal feeling. It often felt like she was looking into a glassless reflection of her own.
But still it was all her fault.
Sunset scratched at the back of her neck, lowering her gaze the opposite corner; she didn’t dare to look her reflection in the eye.
Perhaps it was because of her equine trait, but her nose started to pick up on something. With it being summer time and no windows in this room, it was no wonder that the room smelled like it did.
“I-I guess, I’ll being washing the walls again…” Sunset chuckled a bit as her eyes drew close to her reflection. No response. She just lay there, curled up in the corner. The chained latched onto her wrist, while been extended months back, kept her leashed.
Sunset Shimmer hated herself. Still she moved onward. She moved over to one of the stands, where a few books laid stacked.
“Oh? Did you finish up those books?” Sunset piqued up, as if trying to make small talk. “I’ll stop by the library this afternoon and pick you up some more, how does that sound?”
Still no reply.
And why would she? Why would she speak to me? After all of this?
Sunset moved onto the next part of the little makeshift prison, a stench that started to arise from a small pile of cloths in the room, mainly from lower garments, probably pulled off because of the hot sweaty night from before. “I’ll make sure to get these washed tonight, and that you have some fresh cloths for tomorrow?” Sunset spoke, as if trying to make any of this seemed part of the norm. She made a mental note as she would need to help her wash up and get into the fresh clothing.
There was no answer.
Sunset held the sweaty clothing close to her chest, her expression fell downtrodden, and her gaze fell to the concrete flooring of the room. Of course, she thought to herself, what else did she think was going to happen? Did she honestly believe that everything was going to magically fix itself? That one day that she would wake up and everything would be sunshine and rainbows? This wasn’t Equestria.
But still-
The sound of rattling chains rubbing against the hard concrete brought Sunset Shimmer back into reality as she turned her attention back onto herself.
It was a surreal sight; to watch herself crawl onto all fours into the middle of the room, it was a morbid thought as it reminded her of herself of her equine days
Pain tightened in Sunset’s chest. She remembered.
She remembered the pleasure she took in this.
Sunset Shimmer placed the clothing back into the pile, and carefully she made herself back over to her reflection. Careful as if not to scare a wild animal.
Coming to get a better view from the front, Sunset’s heart fell to the pit of her stomach from the sight before her.
There she was, her reflection, scraping away at the food that had been presented to her, devouring it like it was the only bits of scraps that had been presented to her that week. Sunset Shimmer watched as herself ripped away at the bits of food on the plate. It was like watching a wild animal trying to eat to survive.
Sunset Shimmer got down on her knees, the sight of seeing herself in this state weighed heavily against her heart. She made sure that she had gotten three meals of everyday, but to see herself still like this…it…it…
I really am a demon.
“Sunset… I…” Sunset reached out to her other self, hoping that perhaps that they would be able to connect. Hoping that somewhere that-
All she did was just barely lift her hand above shoulder level and as if one survival instinct alone, the other Sunset Shimmer cowered down. Like a beaten down dog cowering before its cruel master.
“No, wait, Sunset…” Sunset Shimmer reached out again, this time she accidently lunged herself out of habit. The other Sunset reacted as it only could, afraid as if it was to be beaten again, she started to move herself away as quickly and fast as she could – away from her.
To see the fear presented into her very own reflection, it hurt Sunset Shimmer both physically and mentally. To see those eyes looking at her as the same way that she was…no…always was.
I am a demon…
She just watched herself back again in her own little corner of the room, all balled up onto the air mattress that Sunset has been able to pre-occupy for her.
To see everything that Sunset had done being reflected into those eyes.
But still…
But still Sunset needed to fix this. She looked back down at the tray of food that was left over. Half eaten biscuits left remained. The eggs were just a mess left over. Only crumbs of bacon remained. A spilled glass orange juice started to stain the ground from a retreating person in pain. Only thing left was …
Sunset Shimmer reached down for the bowl of grits that remained and, quietly, made her way over into the corner of the room.
Then, to see herself cowering down under her over-looming shadow hurt Sunset, but a piece inside of her knew that she had to do this…she needed to do this…she needed this…repentance.
She moved in closer to the other Sunset Shimmer, but as she did so, she did slowly. Getting down onto her knees again, trying to show herself that she wasn’t the same dangerous demon from just a year ago. To show herself that she had changed. To show herself that she was different.
Holding the bowl in her hands, presenting the food, she spoke as softly as she could – something she had picked up from Fluttershy. “Please, Sunset…” she cooed, as if trying to soothe an animal’s wild heart, “You need to eat…”
For the first time, a different reaction from her reflection – there was still fear, but now there was a bit of confusion. Sunset smiled, it wasn’t what she wanted, but she was able to cause a difference in her reaction. She knew she had to press onward.
“Here you go…” she smiled.
If only for just a moment, there was hesitation. But the other Sunset Shimmer, carefully, reached out for the bowl of grits. Her reflection just looked at her with a smile, showing that there was nothing to fear.
She plucked the bowl out of Sunset’s hand, and brought it to her face – never taking her gaze away from her captor. Sunset saw that confusion was still there, but the fear didn’t seem to exist. Just confusion.
Sunset Shimmer breathed a sigh of relief, watching herself eat out of the bowl of grits. To see herself like this was a surreal moment for her, but something like this was truly a sign wasn’t it? That perhaps things were getting better?
But still…
Still, Sunset sat there watching as her doppelganger eat away the last remains of her breakfast.
Still, there couldn’t have been nothing said between the two of them. Sunset Shimmer scratched the back of her neck; she was really bad at making small talk. Usually it was one of her friends that would get the conversation started.
What would one say in this kind of situation? What do you say to your own reflection?
What would her friends say?
“So…” Sunset Shimmer started. Herself stopped mid-bite, was she perhaps afraid that now she was going to get yelled now? Was that the whole plan?
“So dad…” Sunset continued, “I mean, your dad,” she corrected herself, “Your dad’s doing fine…”
“…”
“I mean he is really nice…” she continued, “last week for Valentine’s day he took me out for to see a movie and a dinner, he laughed and called it nostalgic as it was something we used to do….I mean, you used to do…”
“…”
“Oh, right…” Sunset smiled, “he also said he was going to bring home some doughnuts tonight. Would you like some? I can bring you some down later, if you want? In fact I can-“
“…ou…”
Sunset Shimmer sat up to attention. “I’m sorry…” Was this it? Was this the break through that she had been waiting for? Was her self-imprisonment going to be finally over? “What did you just say?”
“…hate you…”
No offense, right?
But Sunset had no time to react as she did as she felt something hard and hot hit against her – a splattered mess of grits pouring down and pooling into her lap.
“I HATE YOU!!” the voice echoed off the wall.
The sound of rattling chains broke out, the other Sunset Shimmer tried to pull free of the chains of that bounded her to the small room, yanking away.
Anger never once entered her mind, pain burning her legs never once registering. All that Sunset could think of at this time was panic. She had to react, or something bad was going to happen. “CALM DOWN!” Sunset grabbed herself by the wrist; she knew that flailing around as she did was going to only hurt her. “Sunset” she called out again, “you have to calm down!”
Still, the idea of trying to calm your own temper tantrum was something one never wanted to deal with. “I HATE YOU!” she cried out in Sunset’s grasp. “I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE!”
Still if she wasn’t careful, “SUNSET! Please calm down! You’re only going to hurt yourself” Sunset found herself screaming at her reflection.
And so, too, did the reflection scream back “I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE!” still struggling in her very own grasp.
Then it happened, magic coursed through her very veins. She saw the images that she never wanted to see. All from the eyes of her very own reflection.
She saw it all.
Flash of memories of being locked away in the darkness of a dark damp room.
She was always being reminded of the murder of her mother. Being told that her father never noticed a thing.
Being starved to death; wondering, hoping that, that day would be the day she would be fed scraps like the bitch she was treated.
Forced to wallow in her own filth.
The fear of dread as an over-looming shadow came closer and closer to her, only just to relish in her misery.
The memory of her torture, still as fresh as her scars on her back.
The beatings that she took from those days, all the time her body was cut up for whatever pent-up aggression from that day was taken out on her.
“That stupid Celestia, how dare she replace me with that useless bitch!”
She remembered her body being stomped into the ground, the blood just pouring out. She couldn’t count just how many times she was used just to let out some anger.
Some of those times, it was just from the joy of just playing with a toy.
There were memories of nights where she would pass out in a pool of her own blood.
And it all was because of some woman with the exact same face as hers.
Sunset Shimmer hit the ground hard as her visions into the past knocked her back into the present. Her breathing started to get erratic and her heart thumping against her chest of if it was trying to kill her.
It was a reminder of everything.
Sunset turned to look back into the corner of the room, her reflection staring back at her. She was clutching her head, screaming as memories flooded back into her mind – things that were only dug up because of…
It’s all my fault…
I’m sorry…
I’m sorry…
“I’m sorry...”
Words were useless, there were somethings that apologizing would never bring back.
“I’m sorry…I’m sorry…”
Empty words…Hollow words…Words that only fell on deaf ears…
“I’m sorry Sunset…I am so sorry…”
Not even thinking, Sunset Shimmer tore out of the room, leaving herself alone. There was nothing she could do. This was all her fault.
“I’M SORRY!” she cried out as she slammed the door behind her.
…
Sunset Shimmer found herself on the front porch of her home. Sobbing into her hands as the reality hit her hard.
She really was a demon.
Tears streamed down her face as she continued her cry. She hated herself for what she had done. Torturing a young woman, psychologically breaking her down into a mess. Being responsible for the death of a woman she could have called, “mother.” Taking advantage of a man that was in the dark, possibly even in denial. Sunset Shimmer ruined this world.
The sound of her sobs lingered on the air. It didn’t matter how many times that she “saved” this world; it was “this” world that was destroyed. A completely innocent family and she destroyed it all.
There was no way she could ever repent for this. It was a reason as to why she never returned to Equestria. To leave this would be to abandon the cage she had made for herself, to leave the sins of her own past alone and manifest and come free.
There was no way out. Sunset Shimmer made her prison in this home she called sin, and that is where she will stay.
But there is always one way out…
“Sunset?” A voice so familiar perked up. oh god, not right now.
“Sunset, Are you okay?” the voice called out again, “I tried calling you, but I kept getting sent to voice mail.”
Play it cool, play it calm, she mustn’t know, they can’t know. Not yet at least.
“Sunset Shimmer?”
“Sorry, Rainbow Dash!” as if almost on que, Sunset Shimmer shot straight up like a rocket, quickly turning her back to her blue friend. “I had gone out for a morning jog earlier, and I must have left my phone inside.” She said commenting towards the house, keeping her gaze from her friend, hoping for her swollen eyes would go unnoticed.
“Really?” Rainbow Dash questioned, “Well you should have called, I would have loved to go out for a morning run with you.” She spoke up with a triumphant smile, to Sunset’s pleasure; it seemed that she had bought it.
“I’ll keep that in mind, Dash.” As if to mimic whipping away sweat from her head and brow, shadowing the fact that she was trying her best to wipe away her very tears.
“Well enough about that!” impatient as ever, Rainbow Dash continued, “We need to get a move on, the others are waiting for us.”
Sunset Shimmer put on a fake laugh, “Okay, okay,” she looked over her shoulder with a smile, making sure her stained shirt would go unnoticed. “I just need to go get some fresh cloths.”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, she never got these ‘pretty princess’ types, perhaps it was a pony? “Well whatever,” Dash said, “Just hurry up, we’re burning day light.”
“Alright, alright,” Sunset Shimmer laughed, before opening the door and rushing in, “I’ll be back down in a minute.”
This Home is not a home, it is only a prison.
