The Carousel Boutique wasn't on the most direct route from the train station to Clickspring's home. But since they had a lesson scheduled for today it seemed easier to drop in and explain things now, rather than head home for a brew and then having to go out again. He hadn't planned on Rarity dragging him in for a cup of her own 'tea'.

Clickspring slurped the last of the herbal infusion from one of Rarity's delicate tea cups and savoured the slightly stronger flavours of the dregs. Chamomile, hibiscus and tulip. It was kind of tasty but not 'divine' as Rarity had declared when brewing up. He wasn't a big fan of drinking hot perfume. Rarity had grilled him about his trip to Canterlot, asking for anything he could remember about the clothing ponies were wearing this season.

Using both hooves he carefully set the cup back on its saucer with a clink. "And that's when they gave me this suppressor and told me not to use any magic until they've figured out what's going on."

The medical horn ring was enchanted to match the wearer's coat colour. But the chunky, thick ring around the base of his horn would be obvious to anypony closer than a few paces away. He couldn't sense anything with the horn, it had gone completely numb, though he could still feel the warm ebb and flow of magic passing through him. There was a slight sucking sensation from the ring as it drained excess magic, keeping it at a healthy level.

Rarity set her own cup down and shook her head as her horn glow faded. "Darling, that's simply dreadful! It's such a homely ring too." She pouted and looked thoughtful. "Perhaps a chapeau of some variety might be wise? I'm afraid I only make them for mares but Doc Stetson's Millinery over on Wain Street should have something to suit your facial structure. Perhaps a flat cap or fedora?"

"Umm… sure, I'll have a look. Thanks for the idea." Clickspring hadn't even thought of wearing a hat. He usually didn't, though he had a floppy rain hat for when he went hiking, maybe that would do.

"Did they at least have the courtesy to tell you when you'll be free to use magic again?"

"They didn't tell me anything. Just made me do a few tests, answer a pile of questions and took a few scans of my head. So I'm not sure if we'll be able to do any more training. You're a great teacher Rarity and I don't want to deprive some lucky foal. So I think we should call off the whole Master and apprentice thing."

"Let's… Let's not be too hasty, dear Clicky." She casually fussed with the frilled edge of a pillow on her seat and said, "Why don't we do this; just keep things are they are for now? Maintain the status quo until we know one way or another, hmm? You can still read the theory and when you're able to resume training we'll pick up where we left off."

Clickspring wasn't sure what to make of her reluctance to move on. He figured that Rarity would be tired of struggling to train his busted ass and eager to take on some other unicorn more deserving of her attention. In a way, he'd have felt relieved to just end it there, even though she had taught him some useful spells.

"Ok. Thank you, Rarity. I'll let you know the moment I hear from Canterlot."

"Excellent! I do hope you'll have good news from them soon." She levitated up the floral decorated teapot in her magic and politely asked, "More tea?"

"Oh, no thanks. I should get home. Being stuck in Canterlot for days has made me eager to get back to work."

Clickspring stood up and Rarity gracefully slid off of her chaise. When they reached the front door he said, "Uhh… t-there's something else I want to ask you about…"

Pausing next to the door Rarity batted her long lashes and asked, "Oh?"

"Did you… ah… Did you make changes to the apprentice admission form I gave you?"

"What? No. I'd never do something like that, Clicky. Why do you ask?"

Clickspring shook his head and said, "It's strange but the form they have in Canterlot has my T.C. as a ten point four. Somepony added a decimal, it's supposed to be a hundred and four. That's what I wrote."

Rarity gave him a puzzled look with one ear up, the other down and her head cocked to one side. "One hundred and four? But that's…"

"Impossible. I know. I know that now anyway." Clickspring chuckled and said, "If you think that's weird I got a hundred and nineteen when they tested me in Canterlot." He waved a hoof at his head. "I figure it's just my wonky horn messing with the equipment."

"I do hope that's all that it is. But your form did read ten point four when I picked it up in the kitchen and… oh…" Rarity's expression quickly went from curious to furious and she hissed, "Sweetie Belle."

Clickspring grimaced when faced with the suddenly angry mare. "I… better go. Thank you for the tea and everything, Rarity." He reached for the door handle with his magic, whinnied quietly when nothing happened and reached out to use his hoof instead.

With no leaves on the trees or brush Noctilucent had to go a bit deeper into the forest behind the hospital. She felt that it made a poetic sense that she ventured into the wilds in order to hunt.

She'd brought a thick blanket to cover the snow and she lay on top of it, still wearing her winter garb to ward away the chill. Cold and frostbite weren't dangerous for an alicorn, but it would still be uncomfortable to be out in it for too long.

As her spirit returned to her body she strained to pull her captured prey through from dream to reality. There were three pops, a bit like the sound of a cork leaving a champagne bottle, and three translucent spheres dropped onto the blanket and landed between her forelegs.

She glared down at them while her panting breath steamed out and blew away on the frigid breeze.

Dragging the disgusting dream imps into the real world had taken most of her magic, so she resorted to using her hooves to scoop up the spheres and drop them one at a time into her saddlebags. She would drain and banish them later, once she'd recovered a little. The third one was still wearing the form of a shark-toothed bunny plushie that it had used to terrorise a young foal. It mindlessly gnawed on the inside of the impenetrable spell sphere.

Noctilucent slowly stood up and walked around a little between the trees. She stretched and wiggled her hips around to get a crick out of her back and one of her stripy, knitted stockings—a Hearth's Warming gift from Derpy—slipped down. She tugged it back into place with her teeth.

Noctilucent sighed as she shook snow from her blanket, folded it and tucked it in on top of the imps. When she'd returned from Canterlot and began hunting using her revised seeker spells, she'd found that Ponyville was infested with the horrid creatures. She couldn't understand why there hadn't been more nightmares to deal with prior to now. She had no explanation for it but something was plainly wrong in Ponyville.

"Applejaaack!"

Standing in the cowshed Applejack sighed and pressed her hat down a little tighter onto her head. She waited for a few moments before putting her shoulder back into the heavy brush she was holding and pushed it along the already near spotless floor.

"Aaaplejaaack!"

Her little sister's voice was closer and realising there was no getting out of it, AJ leant the end of the broom handle up against the shed wall and trotted over to the door. "Ah'm in here."

Apple Bloom's face lit up and she trotted over, her breath steaming out behind her like smoke chuffing from a train engine. Big Mac followed a little more slowly, his big hooves making crunching sounds as he plodded through the hock-deep snow.

"C'mon, Applejack. It's time fer the Hoofsnow Fight!" Apple Bloom chirped with a big grin on her muzzle.

Applejack sighed heavily and reached out to adjust Apple Bloom's scarf a little. She shook her head and said, "Ah cain't go. There's jus' too much work right now. Ah gotta finish up in here, then check up on alla the apple trees an' then finish off mah pre-sen-tation for the Farmer's Local tonight."

With an angry pout, Apple Bloom said, "Aww, fiddlesticks! Yer always too busy workin' these days to have any fun. Ah ain't never seen you work so hard in winter afore!"

"Tell you what. After the Local meetin', how 'bout you an' me go out in the field and do some stargazin'?"

Apple Bloom stomped one of her little hooves and whined, "Ah don't wanna go stargazin' in the middle of the night in an empty field! Ah wanna go runnin' an' yellin' an' throwin' snowballs with mah big sister!" She broke out the big, puppy-dog eyes and begged, "Puhleeease, Applejack?"

Applejack sighed. But when she opened her mouth to say 'no' once again she was hit in the face with a huge, loosely-packed snowball. She coughed and spluttered while Apple Bloom giggled and pronked backwards. When Applejack had cleared the snow from her eyes she looked up and saw Big Mac standing a few meters away, balancing another huge snowball on one of his forehooves and with a big grin on his face.

"Ohhh! So that's how it's gonna be, is it?" Applejack growled.

"Eeeyup!"

Applejack cursed herself for a fool as she chased after Big Mac and Apple Bloom, pausing now and then to scoop up snow and sling it at them. After a few minutes of running, throwing and ducking she started to laugh and relax as they galloped around, smacking one another with snowballs. They quickly made their way into town where the Hoofsnow Fight was in full swing.

Everypony was out in the streets throwing snowballs at one another, making forts and having a heck of a time playing with the damp snow that had fallen the previous night. Old and young, stallion and mare, rich and poor were all busy slinging white balls at one another. Pegasi weren't allowed to fly and unicorns weren't allowed to use their magic, lest they be called 'cheaters' and ganged up on. It was just hooves and snow in a grand, town-wide battle of laughter and fun.

Big Mac and Applejack got into a running battle, circling around and around the frozen fountain in the town square while tossing snow at Lyra Heartstrings and her friend Bon Bon. Apple Bloom had run off to buy coconut coated marshmallow balls and hot chocolate with her fellow Crusaders. Applejack planned to get some once she'd shown Bon Bon that honest farmer pony muscle was better than town pony guile when it came to snow slinging.

When she spotted him, her quick, three-legged gallop slowed and she came to a halt. She stood, snowball in hoof, staring at that stupid, randy colt that she'd tumbled during the Festival. He was over by the fairgrounds with a foal riding on his shoulder, the young filly threw snowballs while Dirt Nap playfully chased a small herd of colts and fillies.

One of Lyra's snowballs slapped Applejack right on the cutie mark but she barely felt it. She figured maybe the ponies he was playing with were kin of the old mare she'd heard his father had up and married. He was part of a big family now and he looked real happy about it. No wonder he'd stopped coming around the farm and pestering her and Big Mac. Good. Good for him.

For the second time today, Applejack caught a snowball with her face. She spluttered and snorted snow out of her nostrils, then wiped at her eyes. Trying to convince herself that it was just her eyes watering from the sting of the snowball strike, she picked her hat up, dusted the snow off and plonked it back on her head.

She ducked Bon Bon's next snowball, kicked her rump into gear and took off after candy maker, scooping up snow to return fire.

Clickspring carried a tray in his mouth, trying to walk carefully as he made his way from the kitchen to the customer lounge in his shop. Only a little tea slopped out onto the tray as he set it down on the coffee table and fortunately none of it got on the cookies. The thought of mushy cookies soaked in cold tea made his dock itch. He turned his head and grabbed a novel that he'd balanced on his rump and plonked that down onto the table, then settled down onto the couch with a sigh. It was the most comfortable seat in the place.

He adjusted his kilt and settled his balls into a more comfortable position, then picked up the mug with his hooves. He blew on it and sipped a little too-hot tea with a loud slurp. Snatching up the book with his mouth, he propped it between his forelegs and nosed it open to his bookmark.

Technically his shop was open for business but there hadn't been any customers in days. Winter was a very slow time for farmers and craftsponies alike. There was no work to do in the shop. Not with the water wheel frozen solid and his horn locked down by the restrictor ring. He'd bought a second-hoof pair of earth pony shoes that were built for holding small tools, but they'd barely fit on his cloven hooves. After wrecking three gears with attempts to file teeth onto them, he'd given up and left everything scattered on the bench. He'd avoided the workshop ever since. The urge to buck all of the clocks to pieces and go for a long, one-way walk in the frozen forest had been almost unbearable.

Clickspring was no stranger to feeling self-destructive, so he'd coped in the usual way; with a trip to the library. The shelves were half-bare, as every other pony in town needed something to do during the winter months, but he'd found a few novels to beat back the gloom.

"Alright, Constable Gaskin. Let's see if you've figured out who the murderer is yet, hmmm? Or should I say 'the murderers'." Clickspring expected the next chapter would shoot down his deduction. Despite being terrible at spotting clues and logical thought, he enjoyed reading mysteries and imagining himself in the title role.

He'd only read a few page before somepony rang the shop's doorbell.

He tucked his bookmark in place, hopped up from the couch and walked to the door. It didn't make sense for anypony to use the bell when he had the 'Open' sign right there in the window. Clickspring flicked a switch with his hoof to disable the door chimes and opened the door.

Sweetie Belle stood on the stoop with a big smile on her little muzzle. Behind her were two fillies he hadn't met but had heard of; a pegasus filly and Applejack's little sister. He couldn't remember what they called their club. Something about cutie marks, which none of them had yet.

Clickspring struggled to keep his ears from folding back and to keep a pleasant smile on his muzzle. Three foals without their cutie marks and there was little chance that Sweetie Belle was here to commission him for his clock making skills. One markless foal was dangerous to property and sanity. Three of them was a recipe for epic disaster and with the Curse, just being around them was probably illegal and risked damaging their immature minds.

Sweetie Belle practically sang, "Good evening, Mister Clickspring!"

"Hi, Sweetie Belle. What can I do for you?"

She smiled cutely and asked, "Do you have an apple pie problem?"

"Uhh… No, I don't even have an apple pie."

"Well, that right there is an apple pie problem ain't it?"

The pegasus rushed forward and shouted, "Come on girls!"

Clickspring lost the battle to keep his ears up and a pleasant expression on his face as the three fillies charged into his home. He had to throw himself sideways against the wall to avoid being run down and after a moment he turned to give chase, letting the front door swing shut on its spring.

They left a trail of wet hoofprints for him to follow. The glass beads of the curtain between the showroom and the workshop flailed randomly and smacked him in the snoot as he pushed through them. He could hear the three fillies up ahead.

"Woah, check out all the clocks!"

"Never mind that, Scoots. The kitchen's over here an' we got work to do!"

Clattering into the kitchen Clickspring found all three fillies unloading their saddlebags onto his dining table. A bag of flour, a foil wrapped brick of butter, cinnamon, shugar and a pile of red and green apples. The speed that they were moving made him feel much older than he was.

"What are you doing in my kitchen?"

Sweetie Belle looked up at him from where she'd been rooting around in the lower cupboards and said, "We're gonna bake you a pie!" She dragged out a mixing bowl and carried it awkwardly to the table.

The little pegasus ran up, almost bumping into him. Clickspring jumped back as she danced on her hooves and asked, "I gotta go! Can I use your can?"

"Uh, sure. It's upstairs at the end of the hall."

"Thanks!" She dashed off, her wings buzzing and her hooves stomping loudly as she galloped up the wood stairs.

Sitting down in the doorway, Clickspring rubbed his temple with a hoof and asked, "Why are you making me a pie?"

Sweetie hopped up onto a chair and said, "Umm… My sister was real mad about what I did to your prenticeship form. She said I had to come over and appleologise." She turned around on the chair to face him and pouted cutely, "I'm really sorry, Mr. Clickspring. I didn't mean to get you in trouble."

Apple Bloom tore open the bag of flour causing some of it to puff up into the air and spill across the table. "Oops. Sorry 'bout that."

Considering his options, Clickspring realised that there wasn't much he could do. He couldn't chase them out on his own without risking physical contact. Nor could he fetch their family without leaving them to run amok. Better to just stay on hoof and try to control things if he could.

He couldn't fault somepony for trying to make amends either. What kind of lesson would that teach a youngster if he chased them out? Even though he couldn't eat apples the right thing to do was accept it.

"Thank you for apologising. You didn't really get me in trouble though."

"But you ended up with a no-magic ring."

"Not because of what you did." He sighed and asked, "Why did you do it anyway?"

Sweetie Belle grabbed a peeler and started carefully but not very successfully removing an apple's skin. "It's a percent. Which only goes to a hundred, so I thought somepony forgot the period."

"You were trying to help? That was… thoughtful of you, but you really shouldn't make changes on somepony else's form like that. Not without asking first." Clickspring rubbed a hoof tip against the base of his horn. The stupid ring made the skin around his horn itch.

"I won't! Not ever again, I promise." Sweetie tossed a mostly-peeled apple into the bowl and gestured at Clickspring's head with the peeler, splattering apple juice on the floor. "Does it hurt?"

"Hmm?" Clickspring went cross-eyed, trying to look at the ring around his horn. "This thing? No. It just feels numb and a little itchy."

"I'm really sorry I got you in trouble."

He shook his head. "Don't worry about it. They would have noticed it when they looked at the results of the T.C. test I did here in Ponyville. I don't think your added decimal was why they needed to see me in Canterlot."

Scootaloo's voice came down the stairwell. "Hey! There's something wrong with your toilet!"

Clickspring groaned, got up and trotted up the stairs. The bathroom door was half open and Scootaloo had her head poked out, anxiously watching him approach.

"What happened?"

She scooted back as he pressed a hoof on the door to push it the rest of the way open. "I, uh, it got blocked up. Sorry. Guess I shouldn't have eaten so much ice cream." Scootaloo gestured at the toilet, "I tried to fix it but your weird plunger got stuck."

Clickspring's large, rubber stallion cock thrust its head up proudly from the squat toilet. He shut his eyes, groaned and banged his head against the door. When he opened his eyes it was still there.

"S-sorry… Uh… Are you ok?"

In a very calm and controlled voice he said, "I'm fine. Please go downstairs and I'll take care of this."

"Umm… ok." Scootaloo walked a few steps and asked, "W-why do you have a mare's rump under your sink?"

The loud noise that came out of Clickspring was something between a squeal and a snort. It hurt his nose and made his eyes water.

Scootaloo ran off, clattering and stumbling down the stairs.

He walked into the bathroom and stared at the dong sticking out of the filthy toilet. It wasn't salvageable. Maybe if he could still cast the cleansing spell that Rarity had taught him, but there was no way he was going to try cleaning it off using just his hooves and mouth. It wasn't like he could take it around to a dildo cleaning shop either because there weren't any in Ponyville. Manehattan, sure, he could probably find one there, but not in Ponyville.

Grabbing the cock's shaft in his mouth he grimaced at the cold filly spit on it. He wondered how could she be so clueless about stallions that she thought this was a plunger? Must have been the suction cup base. It took a couple of good tugs but he pulled it free and placed it in the waste bin. Half of it stuck out and sagged to one side, jiggling a bit as it settled. At least the blockage was cleared and the toilet drained with a gurgle. He stood on the treadle to flush it again and then opened the cabinet door to check under the sink. Yep. There was his rubber mare's rump, the folds of its faux-flesh vagina clearly on display. At least it looked like the young pegasus hadn't moved it or done anything to it… other than using its existence to embarrass him.

He shut the cabinet, sighed and picked up the dildo laden trash can with his mouth and carried it into his bedroom. Shutting the door he pinned a mental note to get rid of it once he was alone again. Clomping back downstairs he walked into the kitchen to find the three fillies having a whispered discussion while they continued to work on the pie.

Scootaloo noticed him and sat up, cutting off what she was saying and going a bit red in the face as she blushed.

"Hi, Mr. Clickspring. Did you get it, uh, fixed?", Sweetie Belle chirped.

"Hi. Uh, you can call me 'Clicky' if you want. Yeah, it's fixed. How's the pie coming along?" They weren't making too much of a mess, though there was flour scattered about and he spotted a slice of apple on the floor under the table.

Apple Bloom stood up on her chair with her fore hooves on the handles of Clickspring's marble rolling pin. Her tongue stuck out the side of her mouth as she pushed it back and forth over a sheet of dough. "S'goin' real well, I reckon. Me an' Granny bake pies together all the time… Clicky."

"Good. Well… uh…" He wasn't sure what, if anything, he should be doing. He rarely had guests and none had ever barged in and started aggressively cooking for him before.

Sweetie Belle spooned some shugar into a bowl of sliced apple, using her magic on the small tablespoon. She switched to hoof to pick up a bigger wooden spoon to stir it in. After a few minutes of awkward but industrious silence she asked, "Are you a can… canna... cannibal?"

"What?!" Clickspring's head jerked so hard that his glasses nearly slid off of his muzzle.

Apple Bloom grimaced and said, "What the hay, Sweetie? Y'can't just blurt out a question like that!"

The three fillies all began talking at once while Clickspring blinked a couple of times in confusion and gently use a hoof claw to shove his glasses back in place. The gist of their increasingly loud argument was that if Clickspring was a crazy, pony-eating monster then they should run away and get help. Opinion was divided on who they should run to, with Apple Bloom favouring her big brother, Sweetie thought they should get Twilight and Elements of Harmony and Scootaloo insisted that Rainbow Dash would kick his rump.

They ignored Clickspring when he said, "Hey. But I'm not a cannibal." He raised his voice and tried again, "Hey! Fillies! I'm not crazy! I've never eaten anypony!"

The increasingly loud fillies ignored him. Sweetie Belle scattered a few gooey slices of apple mix on the table and Scootaloo's buzzing wings kicked up a small cloud of flour.

"QUIET!"

That got their attention. Though Scootaloo jumped out of her chair and ducked under the table.

Clickspring sighed and rubbed his eyes before saying, "This is about what, uh…" He pointed at Scootaloo hiding under the table and asked, "It's about what she found in my bathroom, right?"

"Her name's 'Scootaloo', and yep." Apple Bloom sat back in her chair and rubbed her flour coated hooves together nervously. "Umm… Why do y'have, uh, a butt in yer bathroom?"

Underneath the table, Scootaloo snickered and said, "Butt. Butt, butt, butt." Which got the other two giggling.

Clickspring really didn't want to have this discussion with anypony, let alone a trio of under-age fillies, but he couldn't see any other way that this conversation could go and no believable lie sprang to mind. "It's fake, not a real… It's made out of rubber. Look, I'm not a cannibal and if I were I'd keep body parts here in the kitchen instead of the bathroom. Right?"

"So why do you have a butt in your bathroom? Seems pretty weird to me." Scootaloo's guarded look at him made it pretty clear that Clickspring was not off the hook yet.

"Umm…"

"Is it an adult thing?" Sweetie Belle asked. "'Cause my sister got pretty mad when I found some magazines in her room that had pictures of ponies kissing and hugging and stuff. She said it was an 'adult thing' and I wouldn't understand and she made me promise not to… Oops!"

Clickspring coughed to cover up a laugh and sat down in the kitchen doorway. "Yes, it's... adult stuff. I guess you're all too young to have had classes about this in school yet."

"He's talkin' 'bout how babies are made." Apple Bloom chuckled and leant over the table to grab the rolling pin. She went back to rolling out the dough and said, "Ah don' need no classes to teach me 'bout that. We help the cows on our farm with their baby makin' in April an' with givin' birth in the spring."

Sweetie Belle perked up and asked, "Oh, that sounds neat! Can I come help with the birthing this year? Maybe I can get a midwife cutie mark."

"Y'sure can!"

Scootaloo stuck her tongue out. "Bleh. Not me! I was flying around and saw Mr. Angus and Mrs. Daisy out in a field-", she used her hooves to make air-quotes, "-making babies."

Clickspring squirmed where he was sitting, torn between keeping an eye on the fillies making a mess of his kitchen and having to listen to any more of their juvenile conference about sex. He hoped that Scootaloo wouldn't make the anatomical comparison between what she'd seen the cows doing and the dildo she'd been using as a plunger.

Apple Bloom set the rolling pin aside and scratched the side of her head, getting flour in her mane.

Sweetie Belle pushed the metal pie tin across the table so Apple Bloom could get the sheet of dough into it. She shook her head and said, "I wonder if my sister has a rubber butt in her bathroom?"

"Rubber butt! Rubber butt!" Scootaloo chortled as she finally came out from under the table and hopped back up onto her chair.

Clickspring chuckled and said, "I don't think you need to worry about that, Sweetie Belle. It's not like every adult has one."

"Why do you?"

"Oh… umm…" Clickspring waved a hoof vaguely in the air while he tried to think of a reply. "It's because… because I live alone."

"You have a rubber butt because you don't have a special somepony?" Sweetie Belle's voice was particularly squeaky.

Scootaloo's nose wrinkled and she asked, "You mean you-"

Clickspring interrupted. "Don't ask questions you don't want to hear the answer to. Ok?"

She nodded and muttered, "I'm glad I didn't touch it."

"Me too. Now can we please, please stop talking about it?"

Clickspring hopped up and walked across the kitchen to his refrigerator. "Would any of you like a drink? I have, uh, just milk or water actually. Or I can make tea if any of you like tea."

"No juice?" "Or soda?" "Or coffee?" The fillies asked.

"Scootaloo! You ain't never supposed to drink coffee again. Remember what happened last time?"

"Yeah! It was awesome!" Scootaloo's eyes shone as she grinned a bit crazily.

Clickspring made a mental note to never give Scootaloo anything with caffeine in it. After the girls each decided on milk, he poured them glasses and set the kettle on to make himself some tea. The mug he'd left in the showroom would be stone-cold by now. He also stoked the wood fire a bit so the oven would be hot enough for baking the pie that was quickly taking shape. Apple Bloom certainly knew what she was doing and the results looked like something you could buy in the shop, which it probably was since the Apple family supplied a lot of pies to the local stores.

The fillies' conversation was quieter and Clickspring tuned them out, standing next to the kitchen sink, sipping his tea and gazing out the frosty window at the frozen river behind the mill. Another month or so and it would be Winter Wrap Up. The river would flow and he could get the mill running again. Hopefully, he'd have the use of his horn by then and he could get back to work.

He jumped in surprise and almost dropped his teacup as Apple Bloom brushed past him, carrying the pie tray's handle in her mouth. Fortunately, she'd only bumped into his kilt so the Curse didn't do more than cause an unpleasant stirring down between his thighs. He quickly backed away a few steps until he was as far into the corner of the room as he could go, with his rump pressing up against the refrigerator.

The little earth pony hooked a hoof into the oven's handle, swung the door open, slid the pie in and closed it again. She turned and said, "That'll be ready in 'bout fifteen minutes. You got a timer, Clicky?"

Clickspring chuckled and said, "You're asking a clocksmith if he has a timer? I have dozens of them!" He reached up onto the counter to set down his tea and to wind up one of the timers he kept in the kitchen. The apple-shaped one of course.

"Also, ah jus' wanted to say ah'm sorry 'bout the whole-", she waved a hoof in a circle, "-talkin' 'bout your, uh…"

Sweetie Belle chimed in, "Yeah, we're sorry too Mr., uh, Clicky."

"I'm sorry for wrecking your toilet and plunger."

"Ok, well, ah, thanks. I'm sorry you ended up seeing… that. I don't get many visitors, but I should be more careful. I guess."

It felt very weird apologizing to the young fillies. He should probably be angry. They barged into his home, made a mess of the kitchen, ruined his favourite dildo and embarrassed the hell out of him. Foals looking to 'earn' their cutie marks were a frightening force of nature. But he didn't feel angry, just tired and wanting to forget that this had happened. With any luck they could quietly wait for the pie to cook, share it, he'd thank them again and politely hoof them out the door.

It was quiet for a few minutes, aside from the fluttery sound of the oven's fire and a few cracks and pops from the burning wood.

Sweetie Belle sipped some of her milk and said, "Umm… Clicky? May I ask you a question?"

"Sure, as long as it's not about the, uh-" He waved a hoof towards where the bathroom was, upstairs.

She nodded and asked, "I was wondering why you don't have a special somepony? Did they die?"

Clickspring immediately thought about just saying 'yes' and leaving it at that. It would be the simplest answer and one they'd respond to with sympathy rather than another discussion of things best left locked away in a cabinet. But he'd been lied to a lot as a foal; told polite half-truths that made life more difficult later on. He didn't want to do that to anypony else.

"He didn't die, no. He met somepony else and moved out."

Apple Bloom gave him a funny look and asked, "'He'?"

"Do you have a problem with that?"

"Nope! Mah brother's kinda sweet on another stallion an' ah think they're cute together. S'just Scoot's said you have a mare's backside upstairs is all."

Clickspring sighed. They were back to talking about that again. Great. Maybe he could steer the conversation away from it. "I'm glad to hear you're not upset by your brother liking another stallion. I know there are some ponies who are upset by it."

"Weeeell… ah thought it was kinda weird at first when he come around tryin' to give my sister flowers n stuff. She chased him off an' later I found him an' Big Mac cuddlin' out behind the barn. But like ah said; they's cute together." She sighed sadly and said, "But he ain't been 'round in weeks an' weeks an' AJ's been actin' like somepony stepped on her heart."

Clickspring blinked and cocked a curious ear. "So he came to give your sister flowers and is also seeing your brother?"

She nodded. "Yep. Right after the Festival, so ah reckon they met there an' he fell in love with both of 'em. Ain't so strange, y'know. Herds are traditional an' we Apples is very traditional." She puffed her chest up, obviously very proud of her family heritage.

Clickspring suddenly remembered the 'Apple Adapter' cake Pinkie Pie made for Dirt Nap and he asked, "This stallion… was he a young earth pony, mostly dark brown with grey patches?"

"Yep."

"Hah! I know him. We're friends… sort of." Dirt Nap had never discussed what had happened at the Festival with Clickspring, but if he'd really ended up with the Element of Honesty and her big brother... Clickspring was impressed. And kind of jealous.

Apple Bloom jumped up onto her hooves and grinned. "Y'know him?! Can y'get him to visit Sweet Apple Acres?"

He held up a hoof and said, "I haven't seen him in ages. Not since before Hearth's Warming."

He'd last seen him at the post-Festival session with the cake, after which Dirt Nap had stopped going and Clickspring had only made it to one more. He'd been so busy preparing for winter, then Hearth's Warming where everything shut down and then that terrible trip to Canterlot. He'd been too depressed to go out since he'd returned home.

"Awww… ponyfeathers." Apple Bloom pouted and scuffed a hoof on the floor.

"If I see him, I'll let him know you want to talk to him. Ok?"

"Fair enough. Thank you, Clicky", she nodded and her large mane bow bobbed around for a moment. "Ah guess you must be like him then? You like colts and fillies?"

Clickspring nodded, "Stallions and mares, yeah."

"Then it should be easy for us to find you a special somepony!" Sweetie Belle squeaked happily.

"What?!" It felt like Clickspring's eyes were going to pop out of his head.

Scootaloo snorted and said, "We don't gotta do anything. He'll meet his special somepony at the Festival."

"Nuh uh! My sister's gone for years and she hasn't met hers." Sweetie Belle waved her hooves in the air, "And what if his special somepony isn't a unicorn?"

"Hey!" Clickspring unconsciously stomped a hoof for emphasis. "Stop it! I don't need your help! I don't even want a special somepony. I'm f-fine with how things are right now." He felt his heart lurch a little at that ears-up lie. Then realised that his ears were flat to his skull, so he struggled to get them to stand up in the tense silence that followed his outburst.

Just as he got them up and had damped down his emotions, the timer went off and the jangling racket made his ears twitch flat again. He smacked the button on top of the plastic apple, inhaled a deep breath while looking out the window and slowly let it out. Apple Bloom grabbed a mouth-cloth and opened the oven door. The scent of pastry, cinnamon and apples in the kitchen became overpowering and Clickspring's tummy rumbled loudly.

Apple Bloom glanced at him as she extracted the pie and her giggle was muffled by the cloth. She trotted over to the table and carefully slid it onto a wire cooling rack, then trotted back to hang the cloth up on its hook next to the oven. She gave Clickspring a wan smile and said, "You gotta let it cool down for a while. I guess we'll… Oh! Wait, did ah…?" She turned to check her side and sighed when there was no cutie mark.

The other two fillies checked themselves and groaned in disappointment.

Clickspring smiled and asked, "What did you think you'd get cutie marks for?"

Apple Bloom shrugged. "Not pie makin'. Ah been doin' that since ah was a little filly. Maybe housekeepin'?"

"Apple peeling?" offered Sweetie Belle.

"Plumber?" said Scootaloo, which made Sweetie Belle giggle.

Clickspring snorted a surprised laugh as he imagined Scootaloo with the image of his ex-favourite dildo blazoned on her flank. That would be one Tartarus of a cutie mark to try and live with.

Apple Bloom trotted over to the table and wiggled into her saddlebags. "Ah'd better get home afore it gets dark."

Sweetie Belle hopped down from the table and squeaked, "Me too! Rarity said I had to be back before sunset."

Clickspring trailed behind the three fillies as they walked to the front door. He coughed to get their attention and said, "Thank you for, uh, dropping by and for the pie. I'm sorry for yelling."

Scootaloo laughed and said, "No problem. We get yelled at a lot."

Clickspring smiled and nodded. He'd had an easy time getting his cutie mark, but he sympathised with their anxiety over it. No doubt they were bullied by other foals like he'd been bullied because of his stupid horn.

"Have a safe trip home."

"G'nite, Clicky. Enjoy yer pie."

"I will, thank you."

"Bye, Mr. Clickspring."

"Bye, Sweetie Belle. Tell your sister I said 'Hi'."

"I will."

"Later!"

"Take care, Scootaloo. And eat more fibre, ok?"

That got all three of the fillies laughing as they trotted off, their hooves muffled by the thin snow that covered the road. Clickspring shut the door and flipped the sign over the 'Closed'. He walked back into the kitchen, closed his eyes and inhaled the rich, delicious scent of fresh apple pie. Then he got to work cleaning up the mess of spilt flour, egg shells, apple peel and empty glasses.

Author's Note

Please PM me if you spot any issues in this chapter.

Now with a pile-o-fixes courtesy of

Cross Lament