Discord's New Business

by KnightMysterio

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Discord, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Main 6, Spike, Comedy, Starlight Glimmer
Length: 55709

Discord's opened a new shop. He did it legally. This will end well, I'm sure...

One fine morning, Spike woke up early and ran some errands. Then he found Discord putting up a seller's stand, apparently ready to open his own business. One which offers a one-day transformation into anything the user wants. And he apparently had the patience to set up his shop LEGALLY. Twilight and the others brace themselves for the inevitable...

(Content of future chapters controlled by user votes!) (Now with Tropes!)

Now with a 'dramatic' reading: Prologue

Current poll: The transformation is chosen already (Tatzlpony!) You pick who becomes the Tatzlpony! (Voting ends 6/25 at 5PM EST)
Previous poll: The Cutie Mark Crusaders (63 votes out of 390) and Age Manipulation (83 votes out of 392) won
Previous poll: Sunset Shimmer (transformation error won with 83 votes out of 325)
Previous poll: Princess Celestia (85 votes out of 397) and Seapony/Siren (104 votes out of 421) won
Previous poll: Trixie (86 votes out of 357) and Alicorn (90 votes out of 338) won
Previous poll: Fancy Pants and Fleur Dis Lee (genderswap won with 199 votes out of 381)
Previous poll: Princess Luna (zebra won with 85 votes out of 368)
Previous poll: Rainbow Dash (griffon won with 274 votes out of 596!!!)
Previous poll: Rarity (diamond dog won with 184 votes out of 444!!!)
Previous poll: Starlight Glimmer (changeling royal (Chrysalis-type) won with 74 votes out of 257)
Previous poll: Pinkie Pie (alicorn won with 80 votes out 282)
Previous poll: Spike (unicorn won with 60 votes out of 225)
Previous poll: Applejack (minotaur won with 56 votes out of 254)
Previous poll: Fluttershy (draconequus won with 75 votes out of 181)

(Voting closes after a week from the posting of the current chapter)

Published 2017-03-10 16:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-06-20 22:26:32 UTC

Customer 1: Fluttershy

Customer 1: Fluttershy

Discord's New Business
Customer 1: Fluttershy
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Fluttershy blushed after a few moment's thought. “I think... I think I'd like to be a draconequus,” she said.

Discord grinned happily. “My dear, I am more than happy to oblige you,” he said, snapping his fingers.

For a moment, Fluttershy felt nothing save for a tingle from the neck down. And then the changes started. Her tail puffed out, becoming a reddish brown squirrel's tail. Her body lengthened, becoming brownish with gold stripes, the body of a king snake. Her back legs shifted, becoming a deer leg and a dog's leg, while her forelegs became the arms of a baboon and a bear, the bear paw gaining an opposable thumb. Pronghorn deer antlers sprouted from her head, along with bee antennae, her head staying the same otherwise. Her mind filled with the knowledge of how to use her new powers.

“Oh my!” Fluttershy managed after a moment. She smiled, looking herself over, flexing and wiggling her new fingers. “I look adorable!” She turned to Discord, and asked, “How do you think I look?”

To her surprise, though, Discord seemed frozen in place. A bright blush was on his face. Fluttershy blinked. “Um... Discord?”

Discord suddenly let out a chirping noise, puffing his chest out (gaining substantial fluff on his chest in the process). All around him, lollipops, ice cream cones, and flowers singing nonsense songs appeared.

Fluttershy may have been naive on several things, but she could recognize a mating display when she saw one. “O-Oh my!”

Discord blinked, coming to his senses. He blushed even deeper, facepalming and snapping his fingers, dismissing the sweets and the flowers. “I... I'm sorry, that was inappropriate...”

Fluttershy giggled. “It's okay...”

Discord grinned weakly. “It's just... I realize now that I've never actually seen another of my own species. Much less a female... especially one as pretty as you...” he said.

Fluttershy beamed. “You really think I'm pretty?”

Discord stammered, realizing what he said. “I... well... Of course you're pretty, I...” A watch with the numbers replaced with various phrases meaning 'retreat,' the hands pointing at 'Run for it!' and 'Abort mission!' appeared on his wrist. “Oh, look at the time! I'm late for an appointment!” He snapped his fingers, he and his stand vanishing in a poof.

“Aww...” said a voice from behind Fluttershy. She turned, seeing Lyra behind her. “I wanted to become one of those human things I heard Twilight talking about...”

Fluttershy chuckled. “He'll be back. He's just a little embarrassed right now,” she said.

Lyra giggled. “You really do look pretty,” she said.

Fluttershy smiled. “Thank you!” she said. “I'm going to go check on my animals now...” Lyra nodded, heading off in one direction. Fluttershy started to walk off in another, when a thought occurred to her.

“...Why not?” she said. She focused on where she wanted to go, and after a few fumbled attempts, she managed to snap her fingers, vanishing in a puff of flower petals and reappearing right in front of her cottage. The gathered animals all scattered, fearful.

“It's okay!” Fluttershy said, bowing down low and smiling. “It's just me. I just wanted to transform for a day...” She whispered calming things, gently reaching out for her animals. Slowly, as they caught her scent, recognized her voice, the animals came back. Angel was the first to approach, sniffing at her curiously.

Fluttershy smiled, holding out her baboon arm. Angel frowned, backing off, but hopped on her hand after sniffing it, letting Fluttershy bring her up to her face. “See, Angel? It's really me.”

Angel sniffed her. There were so many scents on her now, but her face... it did indeed smell like Fluttershy. Angel gave her a 'what the heck?!' expression.

Fluttershy smiled. Her animals were starting to gather around her again, seeing Angel start to relax around her. “Well,” she said, “Discord's offering a business where ponies can transform for the day. I decided to become a draconequus, like he is.”

Angel facepalmed, silently vowing to kick Discord's shins in the next time he saw him.

Fluttershy smiled. “Now, don't be like that,” she said. “It's just temporary. And it's actually quite fun! Here, let me show you! Remember that gourmet salad you wanted?”

Angel looked up. Fluttershy smiled, snapping her fingers and willing the ridiculously decadent salad, with spiral-sliced carrots, cream cheese, and strawberries among the treats inside it, into existence. “There you go,” she said. “Special occasion. Enjoy!”

Angel stared at the salad, drooling with desire. He then wiped his mouth and patted Fluttershy on the nose, as if to say 'All is well. Carry on.' He then hopped off of Fluttershy's baboon hand like a diving board, leaping into the salad and devouring it greedily.

“Be careful!” Fluttershy admonished. “Be sure to chew your food properly!”

Angel didn't listen, chomping the decadent salad eagerly, making happy noises as he did.

Fluttershy shook her head, giggling. “My my. You really are a little piggy,” she said. As she said it, a wild, silly idea occurred to her. She held out her bear arm... and snapped her fingers.

Angel turned into mist, enlarging and reforming as a big pink pig. Some of the other animals chuckled. It took Angel a moment to realize he was snorting and oinking. When he did, he looked himself over and let out a shriek, giving Fluttershy a betrayed, angry look.

Fluttershy blushed. “I told you not to eat so fast,” she said. “I know you think it's just me being bossy, but I just don't want you to choke.”

Angel huffed, folding his forelegs in irritation.

“Don't give me that look,” Fluttershy said, folding her arms as well. She was feeling rather bold, now that she had such amazing new magic. “I'm the one taking care of you. It's not a chore just to be a little more careful in how you eat.”

Angel sighed, and delicately picked up a piece of gourmet lettuce in a trotter, eating it daintily.

Fluttershy giggled. “There. Was that so hard? Just don't wolf your food, okay? You're a bunny, not a wuffwuff,” she said, snapping her fingers and turning Angel back into a bunny. He sighed, rolling his eyes and eating his treat again.

Fluttershy, satisfied, snapped her fingers a few more times, creating treats for all her animals. Content, she curled up with them, watching as they ate. As she did, though, she felt herself getting a little bored. Everything felt... too static.

Is this what it's like for Discord? For peace and quiet to feel so... wrong? she thought, feeling a little sad for her friend. She thought a little, some ideas of how to entertain herself coming to her. She hoped her friends would forgive her later... Kissing Angel on the head, she said, “Be good while I'm gone, critters. I have some stuff I need to do.”

She focused on her destination and snapped her fingers, vanishing in a puff of phantom butterflies. She reappeared in midair, hovering just above a cloud. She found Rainbow Dash working with Thunderlane, Flitter, and Cloudchaser, rearranging some cloud formations.

“So you're really gonna do it?” Flitter asked, smiling. She had become a thestral, her wings batlike and her fangs pointed.

“I think so,” Rainbow Dash said. “I mean, free transformation, no risks, lasts just a day?” She shrugged. “I have a few ideas, and it could be cool.” She smirked at Flitter. “I'd definitely become something a bit more different than what you picked.”

Flitter sighed. “Yeah, I was expecting a bit more than just getting a craving to eat bugs and gaining the ability to eat meat,” she said. “Bacon's really tasty, though.”

Cloudchaser and Thunderlane looked amused, if a bit ill at the mention of meat.

“Dunno if I could go through with it,” Cloudchaser said. “I've never wanted to be anything other than me.”

Fluttershy ducked down behind a cloud as they chatted, wishing she were invisible. And then she was. The draconequus giggled, pleased with how things were going.

Rainbow Dash moved a cloud out of the way, and went to talk with the others some more. Fluttershy snapped her fingers, and the cloud moved right back where it was before.

“What the...” Rainbow Dash said, confused. She moved the cloud back. Fluttershy snapped her fingers again, giggling, and the cloud sprayed water in Rainbow Dash's face.

Flitter, Cloudchaser, and Thunderlane chuckled. Rainbow Dash scowled. “A wise guy, eh?” she muttered as the cloud moved on its own again. “Listen, we have to have this sky cleared, so you get back where you're supposed to be! Got it?”

Fluttershy snapped her fingers, and the cloud sprayed Rainbow Dash again. “Why you little...!” The draconequus giggled, the cloud she was controlling sprouting a top hat, monocle, and mustache. The cloud removed its hat, bowed to Rainbow Dash, and ran off.

“Get back here!” Rainbow Dash screamed, chasing after the cloud as it zipped back and forth.

“I don't know what's going on, but I love it,” Thunderlane said.

After a few minutes of chasing, Rainbow Dash getting more and more furious, Fluttershy made the cloud stop, turning it into cotton candy. Rainbow Dash crashed into it head on, Fluttershy cracking up with laughter.

Rainbow Dash spat out cotton candy, looking around in confusion for the source of the sound. “Fluttershy?” she asked, confused.

Fluttershy appeared, nodding and giggling. “Sorry. I just... I couldn't resist.”

Rainbow Dash, understanding what happened, grinned. “That was AWESOME!” she said. “Epic prank, Shyshy! I approve!”

Fluttershy beamed. “Thank you,” she said, snapping her fingers and turning the cloud back to normal, and moving it where Rainbow Dash had it before.

“Pretty cool look, Fluttershy,” Rainbow Dash said, looking her over. “Planning on some more fun?”

Fluttershy nodded. “I think so,” she said. “So long as it's harmless.”

Rainbow Dash nodded. “Sweet,” she said. She flew over to the other pegasi. “You ponies good?”

Flitter nodded, looking over the clouds. “Yeah, everything's done. You go have fun,” she said. Rainbow Dash grinned, zooming back over to Fluttershy.

“So what's next?” Rainbow Dash asked.

Fluttershy blushed. “Well... I had an idea for Pinkie Pie,” she said.

“Awesome! She'll love it, I know it!” Rainbow Dash said.

Fluttershy smiled, and snapped her fingers, the two of them vanishing. They reappeared, shrunken down, inside Sugarcube Corner.

“Whoa...” Rainbow Dash said, remembering the Poison Joke incident. “So this is what it was like for Applejack...”

Fluttershy hushed her, having them hide behind a canister of flour. As the two watched, Pinkie Pie happily served customers while the Cakes made delicious confections for all.

“We need to do something,” Rainbow Dash said, licking her lips. “I'm getting hungry.”

Fluttershy giggled. She looked down, seeing Pinkie Pie serving Button Mash a birthday cake decorated with the Super Ponio Brothers on it. She waited until Pinkie Pie finished singing, before turning her attention to the cake. “Something special for Button first,” she said. She'd played a level of Super Ponio Brothers before, and while she didn't really like the game (jumping on cute little turtles was mean), she remembered the layout of the first level. Snapping her fingers, the cake reshaped itself into the end-of-level castle. It was still the same cake, just reshaped. From the castle came a 3D version of the first level of Super Ponio Brothers, the Ponio Brothers themselves appearing once the level was fully formed.

“Whoa...” Button Mash, along with everyone else in the store, watched in fascination as the Ponio Brothers did a runthrough of the level, cheerful music playing. As they watched, the brothers made their way successfully across the level, reaching the top of the level flag and riding it down. High-hoofing each other, they went into the castle, reappearing on top of it as marzipan statues, the level construct disappearing, leaving only a cake.

“BEST CAKE EVER!” Button Mash said, hugging his confused, but very pleased mother.

Pinkie Pie stared, her jaw dropped. She turned to the Cakes, who shrugged.

“He likes it,” Carrot Cake said. “I'm not complaining.”

Pinkie Pie giggled, and went back to work.

“That was sweet on many levels,” Rainbow Dash said, “but please tell me that you have more planned.”

Fluttershy grinned a very Discord-like grin. “Trust me...” she said, snapping her fingers.

As Pinkie Pie went around the counter, a muffin leaped out of the nearby basket. Before the earth pony's confused eyes, the muffin sprouted arms and legs, producing a cane out of nowhere. Music started up again, and the muffin began to dance.

Pinkie Pie giggled, despite herself. “I don't know what's going on, but I kinda like it,” she said. The music went into a new verse, and two more muffins got up and started to dance.

Rainbow Dash giggled as Pinkie Pie watched in amused confusion. “This is hilarious. What's next?”

“Just watch,” Fluttershy said.

Carrot Cake and Cup Cake came up to the dancing muffins, three more joining the chorus line of confections. “It's a sad commentary on life that I'm not as fazed by this as I should be,” Carrot Cake said.

“Do you think this has anything to do with that stand Discord was setting up this morning?” Cup Cake asked.

“Probably!” Pinkie Pie said. “This is kinda fun! I should be singing here...”

Button Mash, meanwhile, was enjoying his cake, watching the muffins dance. The bell to the store rung, signaling somepony coming in the front door. A blonde, gray-coated pegasus with bubbles for her Cutie Mark came up to the counter. When the muffins noticed her.

“PRAISE THE DERP!” they chorused, kneeling before her and throwing out their arms in salute. “PRAISE HER SUNNY DISPOSITION AND HER MISMATCHED EYE DIRECTIONS!”

Rainbow Dash doubled-over with laughter, Fluttershy grinning.

The blonde pegasus stared at the muffins, and shrugged. “My usual,” she said, placing some bits on the counter.

Carrot Cake nodded, producing a bag and holding it up. “Okay, in you go,” he said to the muffins. They all trotted into the bag, chanting “Praise the Derp!” over and over again.

Fluttershy dispelled the enchantment on the muffins once they were in the bag, giggling. She snapped her fingers again, switching Carrot Cake and Cup Cake's genders and making it so only Pinkie Pie noticed.

Pinkie Pie's jaw dropped in surprise. “Wha...?”

“What's wrong, Pinkie?” Carrot Cake asked, a warm smile on her face. The slender mare quirked her head to the side.

“Wha... You both... you just... HUH!?” Pinkie Pie stammered.

Cup Cake frowned, the chubby stallion giving her a worried look. “Pinkie, are you okay?”

“MY BRAIN! IT BURNS!” Pinkie Pie said, confused.

Rainbow Dash cackled. “Okay, I think that's enough!” she said.

Fluttershy nodded. “Yeah, any more would be too much,” she said. She snapped her fingers, reverting the Cakes back to normal, she and Rainbow Dash appearing in the customer area at full size. “Hi Pinkie!”

Pinkie Pie stared. “Oh... OOOOOH!” she said, finally getting it. “Flutterequus! That's why everything got weird!”

The Cakes, having never noticed their sudden gender swap, just shrugged and went back to work.

Pinkie Pie bounced over to her. “That was so cool! And you look adorable?”

Fluttershy grinned happily. “I'm so glad. It wasn't too much though, was it?”

“You made muffins dance and gave a kid a show he liked,” Pinkie Pie said. “As pranks go, they were fun ones!”

Rainbow Dash grinned. “Feel like being our pranking buddy for the day?” she said.

Pinkie Pie giggled. “I still have a few more hours in my shift, but I can join you later!”

Fluttershy grinned happily. Normally, she wouldn't join in on the pranks, but she was feeling good. She had these powers for the day, and she wanted to use them! “Sure!”

Rainbow Dash cheered. “AWESOME!” she said. “And don't worry. It'll just be fun stuff like you've done already.”

Fluttershy nodded. “Thank you... And thank you for not being weirded out by this,” she said.

Rainbow Dash scoffed. “You're our friend. Why would we be? I just think it's cool that you went first!”

Pinkie Pie giggled, nodding in agreement.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville Square...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“Whatcha listenin' to?” Applejack asked.

Discord chuckled. “The sound of a very fine day starting,” he said. “Anyway. I assume you're here to take me up on my generous offer?”

Applejack nodded, chuckling. “Yeah, the family talked me into it,” she said.

“You're actually taking a day off? This is a momentous event,” Discord cracked.

Applejack rolled her eyes. “Anyway, I've thought about it, and I know what I want to try being.”

Discord nodded. “Ask away...”

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Applejack transforms!

Author's Note

See?! SEE?! I can follow an update schedule!

Soldier: ...

Yep, I can definitely follow a weekly update schedule.

Spy: ...*eyebrow raise*

Anyway, draconequus won with 75 votes, which was 41% of the total votes.

Next up, Applejack! What should she turn into?

Customer 2: Applejack

Discord's New Business
Customer 2: Applejack
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“A minotaur!” Applejack said.

Discord blinked. “I must admit, I didn't see that coming,” he said.

Applejack grinned. “Finally got one over on you, eh?” she asked.

Discord smirked. “Took you long enough,” he teased. “Anyway. Minotaur. Any particular reason?”

“You seen how buff minotaurs get? Imagine all I could haul with those big ol' arms. Less complicated than messin' with harnesses, too. I just gotta pick up the baskets and haul them away,” Applejack said.

Discord stared at her. “So... you want to become a minotaur to get some extra work done on the farm, despite supposedly 'taking a day off.'”

“Eeyup,” Applejack said, smirking.

“So... you're cheating,” Discord said.

“Eeyup,” Applejack said, grinning even wider.

“And you admit it?” Discord asked.

“Element of Honesty, remember?” Applejack said, shrugging.

Discord's mouth slowly curled up into a smile. “I like you,” he said, snapping his fingers.

There was a poof, and Applejack found her hooves unfolding, turning into hands. She stood up, her body becoming bipedal as horns grew out of either side of her head. Her fur, mane, and eye color stayed the same, and her cutie mark remained on her hips, but the changes aside from that were near total. Her tail became whiplike, with only a tuft of blonde at the end while the rest was orange furred. Apple-shaped white patches appeared on her fur as her muzzle changed to be more bull-like. A ring appeared in her nose, and her chest bulged out. Her fur thickened from the waist down, covering the necessary parts there and giving the impression she was wearing pants, while a red top appeared to cover her new bosom.

“The heck...” Applejack said. “Why are there teats on my chest?”

“Minotaurs call them udders,” Discord said. “Humans have so many lovely names for those fat globes. And honestly, how do you think bipedal creatures nurse their young?”

Applejack looked thoughtful, looking down at her chest, and nodded. “Okay, that makes sense when y'think about it,” she said, nodding. “What about the nose ring?”

“Cultural thing. Minotaurs were a slave race back in the day,” Discord said. “They freed themselves and kicked the horseapples out of their slavers. Now? The nose rings are more of a dare. 'Put a chain on me and see what happens to you.'”

Applejack smiled. “I like that,” she said. She looked over her muscular arms, flexing. “Yeah, okay, this feels good. Thank y'kindly, Discord.”

Discord nodded. “Have fun,” he said as Applejack tromped off. As they left, he felt something underneath his table. He looked, and found Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Rainbow Dash hiding underneath it.

“Hi,” Pinkie Pie said, grinning nervously. “If Cranky asks, we're not here.”

“Botched a prank?” Discord asked.

“I forgot he's sensitive about his toupees...” Fluttershy said, embarrassed.

Discord snickered. “What'd you do?”

“Well...” Fluttershy said.

Before any of them could say anything, Cranky's toupee walked up to Discord, carrying a golf club on its back. It handed Discord a button saying 'Vote Toupee!' and strode off, whistling a ridiculous song.

Discord grinned. “Ah, the living hairpiece. It's nice to see an appreciation for the classics,” he said.

Rainbow Dash snickered. “Yeah, but now Cranky's chasing after us with a warhammer, so... we're gonna hide until he calms down.”

Discord nodded. “Your secret's safe with me, girls,” he said. “I'll always protect a fellow troublemaker.”

Pinkie giggled, hugging him. “You're the best,” she said.

“That I am,” Discord said, smirking. “...In the meantime, how do you feel about messing with Applejack?”

Fluttershy fidgeted. “I was kinda hoping to wait until Cranky calmed down...”

“He's a sturdy old cuss,” Discord said. “He'll be fine. I'll give him a swag new do later. That being said, Applejack was just by here.”

“Oh yeah?” Rainbow Dash asked. “What'd she get?”

“Minotaur,” Discord said.

Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash stared. “...Seriously?” Rainbow Dash asked. “I mean, I know they got some cool history, the Wonderbolts helped them in their rebellions against their slavers centuries ago, but...” Realization dawned, and Rainbow Dash groaned. “Don't tell me she went straight back to the farm...”

Discord just nodded, smirking. “She wanted to try a different work body,” he said.

“AJ... I am disappoint...” Rainbow Dash said.

Fluttershy grinned, an idea coming to her. “I think I have a plan... but I have to talk to a friend about it... Go to Sweet Apple Acres and be ready.”

She snapped her fingers and vanished. Discord, grinning wickedly, snapped his fingers and made a clone of himself with a camcorder. “I have to see this...” he said. “Go with them.” The clone saluted, following Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie as they dashed off to the farm.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Later...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“Cain't believe that y'just wanted a different body to work in,” Apple Bloom said, grumbling at her sister.

The minotaur chuckled. She kicked the tree with a single leg, her powerful limbs shaking all the apples off of it. “I'm still on m'day off.”

“Days off are supposed to be relaxing, sis,” Apple Bloom protested.

“And there's nothin' more relaxing that good old fashioned hard work,” Applejack countered, picking up the apples that didn't make it into the basket. Hands really were quite useful.

“Cheater,” Apple Bloom said. “So much for honesty.”

Applejack smirked. “Now, hold on there. I agreed to take the day off. And what I do on my day off is my business, right?” she said.

“I guess...” Apple Bloom muttered.

Applejack chuckled. “I didn't lie, sugarcube. I just got a different idea of what's relaxing than you do,” she said, ruffling her sister's mane. “Now c'mon. Let's get these baskets back into the barn. Harvest has been great this year.”

Apple Bloom sighed, giving up. She let Applejack place a pair of baskets on a saddle, loading them up with apples. Applejack herself picked up the two heaviest baskets, lifting them onto her shoulders. They walked back to the barn, chatting idly... only for the path back to the barn to turn into a metal pathway.

“What in tarnation...” Applejack said. As she walked, a rather upbeat, half-metal, half-country tune began to play. When they reached the clearing...

Applejack and Apple Bloom's jaws dropped. An arena of sorts had been set up in the barn. A roped off raised platform, a battle ring, was set in the middle of the barn. In the stands, Granny Smith, a camera-wielding Discord, and several different types of electric fan were there, all cheering wildly. Rainbow Dash floated nearby, wearing a black-and-white striped shirt, while at the ringside, Big Macintosh and Fluttershy were sitting at a folding table, wearing electronic headsets. Big Macintosh wore a black stetson hat and had a bottle of barbecue sauce nearby (also wearing a stetson hat), while Fluttershy was wearing regal robes and a crown. In the center of the ring was Pinkie Pie, holding a microphone.

“FIRST!” Pinkie Pie said, the mare clad in a black tuxedo, “Entering the ring, hailing from Sweet Apple Acres, weighing in at 400 pounds of solid applebucking muscle, the Queen of Kick! The Engine of Honesty! APPPPLEJAAAACK!!!”

The fans all cheered, Discord grinning at the befuddled look on Applejack's face as he recorded it. Granny Smith, meanwhile, just watched everything with amusement, pouring apple butter on her popcorn.

“The heck's going on?” Applejack muttered. Apple Bloom, suddenly getting it, grinned and pushed Applejack towards the ring. Applejack barely managed to put the bushels down in time before dropping them.

Glaring at Apple Bloom, who giggled and joined Granny Smith in the stands, she looked at Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash with frustration. “C'mon, I got work to do!”

“Not right now you don't,” Rainbow Dash said, smirking.

New music started up, a hard rock theme. The 'lights' went out, a spotlight focusing on a blue minotaur in a tie as he posed at the entrance way, grunting and flexing his muscles. Fireworks went off around him.

“And her opponent, hailing from Labryna, weighing in at 500 pounds of raw motivational strength, the Champion, the Bull who Takes No Bull, the Assertive Annihilator, the Motivational Mastermind, IRON WILL!”

“YEAH!” Iron Will said. “Iron Will is here to show this fun-shirking cow how REAL minotaurs play!”

Applejack facepalmed. “You gotta be kidding me.”

“Looks like we got a real slobberknocker on our hooves, Queen,” Big Macintosh said, turning to look at a Discord cameraman that appeared. “I'm 'BM' Big Macintosh, here with Flutter 'the Queen' Shyler, and you're watching PWF Friday Night Raw!”

“Yaaay!” Fluttershy cheered.

Applejack just glared at the two of them, and then shook her head, turning to Iron Will as he strutted into the ring. “I'm sorry about this... Iron Will, right? Fluttershy mentioned you. Attended one of your motivational classes, but it backfired?”

Iron Will nodded. “Iron Will has since refined his techniques to account for all personality types! But we're not her for that today! Iron Will has volunteered to come teach you what it really means to be a minotaur! Strength! Freedom! AND WRESTLING!”

Before Applejack could react, Iron Will flipped forward, wrapping his legs around her head, and then flipping backwards, carrying Applejack with her and slamming her down.

The fans in the audience cheered, as did Apple Bloom.

“Oooh! Surprised AJ's horns didn't get embedded in the ring with that one, BM!” Fluttershy said.

“A devastating hurracanrana from Iron Will!” Big Macintosh said. “And as Applejack recovers, Iron Will struts his stuff in the ring.”

Applejack slowly picked herself up. She dusted her hat off, and glared at Iron Will, who was indeed posing and flexing, ascending a turnbuckle to rally the crowd of fans. She grunted, and tossed her hat to Apple Bloom.

“All right, pardner,” she said. “You wanna rassle? Lemme show you how an Apple gets down.” She ran up to Iron Will and grabbed him by the waist, suplexing him off of the turnbuckle.

“OOH!” Big Macintosh said. “A daring counter from Applejack! Can she turn this around?!”

“No way, BM!” Fluttershy said. “Iron Will's the champ! Your sister's good, but Iron Will's unbeatable!”

Iron Will rolled to his feet, dazed a little, but smirking. “Now we're gettin' somewhere...” he said, charging her. Applejack charged right back, the two of them locking horns as their heads slammed together. A pushing match ensued as the two vied for dominance. Eventually, Applejack's greater leg strength started to win out. A grin came to her face as she started pushing Iron Will back.

But experience won out in this exchange. Iron Will flipped his head up, breaking the hold, and chopped Applejack across the chest. He then immediately followed it up with a bulldog slam, grabbed Applejack's head in a headlock and running forward, slamming it down.

Applejack grimaced, rubbing at her neck as she rolled to her feet. As Iron Will charged again, Applejack launched a drop kick, catching Iron Will in the chest with enough force to send him flying back into the ropes. He staggered forward, Applejack following up with a clothesline that sent Iron Will sprawling.

“Yeah!” Applejack crowed. “How do y'all like that?!” She flexed for the crowd, the fans cheering wildly as Big Macintosh and Fluttershy provided commentary. The temporary minotaur was feeling great, the feel of an actual challenge sending a thrill through her.

Before she could fully enjoy it, though, Iron Will grabbed her legs, knocking her over. He wrapped her legs around one of his own and turned over, pulling Applejack into a submission hold.

“GAH!” she yelped, her legs bent at an awkward, painful angle. She struggled to escape, to try and grab the ropes, but Iron Will's grip was as solid as his name. “Lemme go!”

“Not until you submit!” Iron Will said, sitting down on her back and bending her legs even further, pinning her in the center of the ring. “When Iron Will's grip says submit, then you better quit!”

“YES!” Fluttershy cheered. “The Sharpshooter's never been beaten!”

Applejack grimaced, her legs in pain from the hold. She couldn't get leverage to break her legs free, Iron Will's arms strong enough to match her mighty legs. She struggled, but couldn't get free.

“All right, all right, I'm done,” Applejack said, tapping the mat.

A Discord rang a bell, Iron Will letting Applejack go. Rainbow Dash raised Iron Will's arm triumphantly as his music played, the crowd cheering wildly.

“THA WINNA, AND STILL CHAMPEEN, IRON WILL!!!” Pinkie Pie yelled.

Applejack rubbed her legs, grumbling. Iron Will knelt down beside her. “Thanks for the match,” he said. “That was fun.” He offered his hand for a fistbump.

Applejack glared at him for a moment, and then shook her head, fistbumping back. “Sure thing, pardner. I don't mind a tussle now and then,” she said.

To her surprise, Iron Will blushed. “And... uh... if you're interested... um... I'm gonna be in town for a while. Or maybe the next time you're a minotaur, and... uh... oh come on, Iron Will, you're an assertiveness trainer...” He coughed, taking a deep breath to calm himself. “I think you're a real pretty cow and want to take you on a date sometime.”

Applejack blushed, startled. “Um... sure! I'll think about it,” she said. Iron Will beamed, and trotted out of the barn.

Fluttershy snapped her fingers, the costumes and arena and fans vanishing. Apple Bloom ran over to hug Applejack. “I'm sorry you didn't win, sis.”

“You'll always be the champ t'us, little sis,” Big Macintosh said.

Applejack blushed, grinning and hugging her family. “Aw shucks,” she said. “Thank y'kindly.”

Rainbow Dash giggled. “That whole thing was awesome! You gonna meet up with him again?” she asked.

“Well...” Applejack said, a slow grin coming to her face. “Maybe.”

Rainbow Dash grinned. “Epic wrestling prank and we may have gotten a friend a date!” she said, high-hoofing with Pinkie Pie.

Fluttershy smiled. “Thanks for playing along,” she said.

Applejack put her hat back on. “Shoot, I know why y'did it, so I ain't mad. And I did have fun.” She hugged the draconequus. “But if'n y'all are gonna do this sort of thing again, I'd appreciate a little warning.”

Fluttershy grinned wickedly. “Ah, but the best part of chaos is the surprise.”

“Discord is a terrible influence on you,” Granny Smith said flatly.

“Yeah,” Fluttershy laughed.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
In town...
The next day...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Discord was watching a recording of the match with amusement. He'd already handled a few customers, and was enjoying himself.

“Hey,” said a voice. Discord looked around for a bit, before looking down and spotting Spike standing there.

“What's up?” Discord asked. “Certainly not your height.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “I know what I want to turn into,” he said.

Discord snorted. “If it's anything other than 'unicorn,' I'll be surprised.”

That gave Spike pause, the dragon actually starting to think about it.

Discord quirked an eyebrow, interested. “For the record, I'm adding Diamond Dog to the list of standard choices.”

Spike just nodded, thinking.

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Spike transforms!

Author's Note

Proving once again, I can follow a schedule, here's this week's chapter of Discord's New Business!

Minotaur won with 56 votes, which was 22% of the total vote! I'm so happy this is getting so many people voting!

Next up, Spike the Dragon! His plans are fairly obvious, but what will he turn into to realize them? And as Discord said, Diamond Dog is now a regular option for voting!

Customer 3: Spike

Discord's New Business
Customer 3: Spike
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“...Yeah, sorry,” Spike said. “I've planned this out for too long.”

Discord nodded. “Fair enough,” he said. “Unicorn it is, then.”

Spike nodded. “An ADULT unicorn, thank you very much,” he said, putting a bag of bits on the table.

Discord frowned. “I told you that you and the others were getting a freebie,” he said.

Spike nodded again. “Yeah. I'm paying for a full week,” he said.

“And this just became interesting again,” Discord said, smirking. “Planning on the mysterious stranger routine?”

Spike nodded. “I'm gonna romance Rarity for sure,” he said confidently.

“Even though it won't be you, technically, doing the romancing,” Discord said.

“I'm working up to it,” Spike said, frustrated. “I just... I just wanna see if I can do it.”

Discord rubbed his temples. “Look, kid... You really sure you want to do it this way?”

Spike nodded. “Yep! A week's worth of romance with the mare I love? Totally worth it,” he said.

“If she's worth it, she'll love you for you,” Discord said, frowning.

Spike frowned. “Why wouldn't she be worth it? She's the most beautiful, most wonderful mare, most wonderful PERSON in Equestria!”

“Spike...” Discord said. “I know this seems out of character for me, but I've grown fond of you, kiddo. And I think you're...”

Spike scowled. “Discord, c'mon! What can you possibly know about love?”

“More than you think, kiddo,” Discord said. “It's why Princess Stereotypical Hearts & Hooves Day Colors up in the Crystal Empire is more willing to put up with me than most other ponies. She understands. Because love, my little dragon, is nothing more than one of the purest forms of chaos.”

Spike fidgeted uncomfortably. “I've made up my mind,” Spike said. “I already got a lecture like this from Twilight, but I want to do it...”

Discord rolled his eyes. “Fine,” he said. “One week. Don't come crying to me when it backfires.” He snapped his fingers, and Spike vanished in a puff. When he reappeared an instant later, he had become a tall, handsome purple unicorn with a green mane and tail. His cutie mark was that of a scroll surrounded by green flame.

“Nice!” Spike said, chuckling in surprise at his deeper voice. “I... wow, that's weird. Hey, how do I look?”

Discord, more than a little disappointed, conjured up a mirror. Spike grinned happily. “This is great! Thanks, Discord!”

“Sure, fine,” the draconequus said. Spike ran off to put his scheme into motion. He went over to a pair of saddlebags he had hidden, putting them on and taking a deep breath. He looked into the mirror he had set up, using his magic to pick it up, silently grateful that his transformation came with an instant knowledge of basic abilities.

“Okay...” he said to the mirror as he rehearsed his lines. “My name is Quick Scroll. I'm a deliverypony from Canterlot. I've been thinking about moving to Ponyville, though.”

“That's great!” said a voice from behind Spike. He yelped, turning around, spotting Pinkie Pie standing there, grinning happily. “Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie!” she said. “Welcome to Ponyville! I'm glad to meet you! We've been getting a lot of new ponies lately and it's always great to meet new ponies! Because new ponies always means new friends to make! And it's my job as Official Greeter Pony of Ponyville to make sure you're properly welcomed to Ponville with a Patented Pinkie Pie Pony Party!”

“N-No, that won't be necessary,” Spike stammered, trying to maintain his cover as he looked around. “I can't afford to pay for one, so I...”

“First party's always free!” Pinkie Pie said, giggling happily. “It's okay! I do this for every new friend!”

“That makes it sounds like a drug deal...” Spike muttered. “Well... If you do this for every pony, doesn't it get expensive? Especially since you say you do this a lot...”

“Nah, I invest well so I'm pretty much rich, so I can afford it!” Pinkie Pie said.

“Well that answers some questions,” Spike muttered. “And raises so many more...”

“I just LOVE making new friends, and I figure what better way to make a new friend than by throwing them a party? After all, nothing says friendship like a celebration of the fact that you're there!” Pinkie Pie said.

Spike sighed. “Look... Pinkie Pie, that's not necessary. I really don't want a party,” he said.

Pinkie Pie frowned. “Awww, but why?” she said. “Is it because you've heard of me and know what kind of party I usually throw? I can do something more mature! I don't like them, but I can do them!”

“Pinkie, that's not...” Spike started.

“Do you have a phobia of parties? Because I can recommend a great therapist. She said she's given up on figuring me out but...”

“PINKIE!” Spike said. “A party isn't necessary because you've already given me one.”

“Really?” Pinkie said, confused. “I don't remember seeing you before...”

Spike sighed. “Pinkie, it's me, Spike,” he said. “I used my freebie from Discord.”

Pinkie blinked. And then grinned. “Oh! OOOOOH! Okay, that makes sense now! I even kinda recognize you now, what with the fact that you have the similar coloring, and the scroll with green flame as a cutie mark, and you sound like Spike when he's doing an older voice...”

Spike magically clamped Pinkie Pie's mouth shut, looking around worriedly. “Just... just be quiet for a second, okay? I need you to Pinkie Promise me that you won't let anypony know it's me. Okay?”

Her mouth still clamped, Pinkie Pie nodded. “Mmmhmm! Btt why?” she asked.

Spike looked over to where Rarity was haggling with a vendor. He sighed dreamily. “I'm going to date Rarity. Give her a handsome stallion to be with,” he said.

Pinkie Pie frowned. “Btt dnnt yuu wnt to dte Rariry as yrslf?” she asked.

“Just stop, okay?” Spike said, getting frustrated. “I've gotten this twice already. Just... promise me you won't interfere!”

Pinkie Pie shrugged, nodding as Spike let her mouth go. “Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!” she said. “I swear I will not interfere with this cockamamie scheme of yours.”

Spike sighed in frustration. “That'll do, I suppose...” he said. “Now shoo. I need to do this...”

Pinkie Pie nodded, skipping off. Spike shook his head at her, and turned back to Rarity, sighing wistfully. He checked his saddlebags, and went off to enact his plan.

Rarity, for her part, was just going about her day, gathering supplies for her shop. She had been giving Discord's offer a lot of thought. Fluttershy and Applejack had certainly enjoyed their transformations. And to top it all off, Applejack had declared that she was thinking about seeing Iron Will more in the future.

Such possibilities...

Without paying attention to where she was going, she didn't see the stallion until the two had crashed into each other, Rarity's saddlebags spilling out on the cobblestone. “Oh, dash it all!” she said, moving to pick up the spilled threads.

Before she could, however, a bright green field picked them up for her. “I'm terribly sorry,” said a voice. “I really should have been watching where I was going...”

Rarity smiled. “It's all right,” she said. “At least you're gentlecolt enough to admit your mistake. And truth be told, I wasn't watching where I was going either.” After gathering up her fallen items, she turned towards the stallion... and blushed. “Oh my...”

He was a tall sort, with a bright green mane and striking purple coat. “Heh... I'm sorry. My name is Quick Scroll. I'm a deliverypony from Canterlot, here on vacation. Been thinking about moving here, I've heard a lot of good things about it,” he said easily. He blushed, and added, “And if everypony else here is as good looking as you, I have even more reason to come visit.”

Rarity giggled... and noticed the cutie mark. Her face faltered a little, disappointment crossing her face briefly, but she hid it quickly, giving the stallion a flirtatious smile. “Flattery will only get you so far with me, Mr. Quick Scroll. My name is Rarity, by the way.”

Spike smiled. “Well, if you're willing, Miss Rarity, I'd be more than willing to treat you to dinner to make up for running into you,” he said, giving her a suave smile.

Oh well, Rarity thought. “Oh how kind!” she said. “But I think we can dispense with that, shall we? Why don't you come up to my place, and we can get to know each other better.”

Spike gulped. “O-Oh?” he asked.

Rarity flicked her tail at him. “Indeed,” she said. “I think we can make this a bit more... intimate a meeting.”

What's going on?! Spike thought. Another part of his brain was telling him to shut up. Rarity's never been this forward before!! his logical brain thought. Then the male libido part of his brain suplexed his logical part into a box and locked it shut.

The two of them went into Carousel Boutique. Rarity motioned for Spike to sit while she made tea for them both.

“This is going better than I thought,” Spike said to himself, looking around the shop and pretending it was all new to him. “So you're a dressmaker?”

“Indeed,” Rarity said. “Have you heard of the Canterlot Carousel?”

“Oh yes,” Spike said. “My sister bought a dress from there one time, and... wait, are you THAT Rarity?” He grinned. “This is quite an honor, then. My sister looked fantastic in your dress.”

Rarity came out, smiling. “It's always nice to hear my work is appreciated, Quick Scroll,” she said. “One lump, or two?”

“Three,” Spike said. “I have a bit of a sweet tooth.”

Rarity giggled. “Fair enough,” she said, putting the cubes in. “Now, where were we?”

“Well,” Spike said, after sipping his tea.

“Oh, I remember now,” Rarity said, taking Spike's tea away from him. “I was about to show you the night of a lifetime.”

“...Buh?” Spike said. Before he could react, Rarity pounced on him.

Rarity was purring, grinning at the blushing, flustered stallion. “Relax. I always wanted a handsome, debonair deliverystallion to play with.”

Spike gulped. Half of him wanted this, but he knew this wasn't right. “Miss Rarity... Please...” he said.

“Please what, darling?” Rarity said pleasantly.

“This... this isn't like you!” Spike said, sweating fearfuly.

“Oh? And how would you know?” Rarity said, leaning in for a kiss... and then suddenly pulling away, moving across the room. “No... no, I can't!”

Spike just lay there, stunned. He shook his head to clear it. “Miss Rarity?” he asked, confused.

In full melodrama mode, Rarity said, “As attracted as I am to you, darling, I simply cannot act on my feelings. For you see...” She took a deep breath. “I have promised my heart to another.”

Spike's eyes widened. “O-oh?” he said, not daring to hope.

Rarity nodded. “Yes... He's really a sweet young stallion... Kind, gentle, noble, a prince without actually being of royal blood... Although he was a lord for a few minutes.”

Spike was battling not to grin. “He sounds like a good one,” he said.

“Oh he is... So handsome, too... It's just...” She frowned, dropping the melodrama. “There has been problems between us recently...”

WHAT!? What'd I do!? I have to find out, so I can correct it! “Oh? What's happened?” Spike, just barely managing to force himself to be calm.

Rarity turned directly towards Spike. “Well, for one thing, he thinks so little of my feelings that he decided to try dating me in another body, pretending to be a deliverypony named Quick Scroll...”

Spike's heart sank. “I...” he stammered, ears going flat against his head. “I just... Rarity, I don't...” He sighed, head drooping. “I was that obvious, huh?”

“Same coloring, cutie mark a direct reference to your scroll-sending flame, and your voice is far too similar to your natural one,” Rarity said softly. “I admit I was taken aback at first by how handsome you are in this form, but I recognized you quickly enough.”

Spike sighed wearily. “Dang it... I thought I was being so clever...”

“Spike,” Rarity said, “Why did you think pretending to be someone else to date me for a day would be a good idea?”

“I just...” Spike said. “I'm so tired of being treated like a baby just because of how I look. I know I'm young, but I'm not THAT young.”

Rarity sighed. “I suppose that's my fault... But consider how I'd feel. If I had fallen for your disguise, I would have fallen in love with Quick Scroll. Not you. After the day was up, I would have been left pining for him instead of you.”

Spike fidgeted. “I paid for six extra days...”

Rarity sighed. “Oh Spike...” she said. “Do you really think so little of me and my feelings for you?”

Spike grimaced. “No, it's not that, I...” He shook his head. “I love you, Rarity! You are more beautiful than any treasure, any gold, any flower in the world! When I hear your voice, it's like heaven itself singing! And, and the way you act, always so graceful and full of poise... Every motion is perfect! And you're so caring, and loving... Even if it means messing up your mane a little, you'll do what it takes to help a friend, to help someone in need!” Spike was almost crying now. “I don't want anyone else but you, Rarity. And I never will. You're so wonderful... who in this world can compare?!”

Rarity was stunned, blushing a little. She knew how Spike felt about her, but she had assumed for so long that it was puppy love. And while she was a little offended that he hadn't come to her as himself, the fact that he felt so strongly about her... “Spike, I...”

Spike's head drooped again. “I... I didn't want you to find out how I felt about you this way...”

Rarity giggled.

Spike frowned. “What's so funny?”

“Spike,” Rarity said, “the way you feel about me is the worst kept secret in Ponyville.”

Spike groaned, covering his head with his hooves. “Well, this day went to Tartarus fast...” he muttered.

Rarity sighed, and smiled. “Spike... I'm sorry for not realizing how serious your feelings were,” she said. “I will try to be more respectful of them in the future...”

Spike sighed. “Thank you...” he said. “I know, there's a whole species difference between us...”

Rarity shook her head. “That's never been the issue, my precious scales...” she said, sitting next to him.

Spike nodded. “The aging difference, then. Twilight's brought it up a few times, that I age at a slower rate than ponies...”

Rarity chuckled wearily. “By the time you'd look old enough that there wouldn't be trouble, I'd be old and decrepit. Certainly no treasure...”

Spike smiled at her. “Even if you were as old and wrinkly as Granny Smith, I'd still think you were beautiful...”

Rarity gasped, touched. “Spike, I...” She blushed brightly, and realized, to her shock, that she cared just as deeply about the transformed dragon. “Oh, drat it all, this isn't fair...” She closed her eyes.

Spike looked up. “Rarity?”

Rarity shook her head firmly. “No. No, I refuse to give up. You are EVERYTHING I could ask for in a stallion, and for some reason that escapes me you think I'm just as wonderful. We live in a world that has magic that can transform the very foundations of the planet. I refuse to believe that there's no way we can reasonably be together!”

Spike grinned widely. “Yeah... Yeah! We can figure this out!”

Rarity smiled at Spike, kissing him for real this time. “And when we do come together, my precious scales, it will be as each other.”

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Meanwhile...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“Whatcha listening to?” Pinkie asked.

Discord grinned. “Nothing in particular. Just two lovers finally getting it. What do you need, Pinkie Pie?”

“Well,” Pinkie Pie said. “Seeing Spike do his change got me thinking, and I think I know what I want for my freebie!”

Discord rubbed his hands together excitedly. “I've been waiting for this,” he said. “What'll it be, Miss Pie?”

Pinkie Pie smiled, and told him.

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Pinkie Pie transforms!

Author's Note

Sorry this posted late, today just got away from me.

Anyway! Unicorn JUST BARELY wins with 27% of the vote!

Next time, on Discord's New Business, it's Pinkie Pie's turn to transform! And you get to control the vote!

Click here to pick what Pinkie Pie turns into next week!

Customer 4: Pinkie Pie

Discord's New Business
Customer 4: Pinkie Pie
by Jonathan 'KnightMysterio' Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“I wanna be Princess Pinkie Pie for the day!” Pinkie Pie chirped.

“I love you,” Discord said, cackling. “I really do.”

Pinkie Pie beamed. “I know,” she said. “But since Knight's more of a Fluttercord shipper, I know it's more of a platonic thing.”

“I haven't even given you your powers yet and you're already breaking the fourth wall?” Discord said, pulling out a sheet of paper. “Sign here, please.”

Pinkie Pie looked at the paper. “Whuzzis?”

“Standard issue butt covering disclaimer for top tier transformations like alicorn and draconequus,” Discord said. “It says, basically, that you agree I am not legally liable for whatever you do as an alicorn, no matter how much damage is caused.”

Pinkie pouted. “You didn't make Fluttershy sign,” she protested.

“It's Fluttershy,” Discord said. “I'm surprised she had enough mischief in her to even set up that pro-wrestling ring.”

Pinkie smirked. “You're a terrible influence,” she said.

Discord feigned dismay. “I know. And I feel SO bad over it,” he said.

Pinkie Pie giggled. “Okay, that's fair,” she said, signing the paper. Discord rolled it up and put it in a drawer with other scrolls. He snapped his fingers...

...and KnightMysterio appeared in front of him, a blue unicorn colt with his avatar from FIMfiction as his Cutie Mark!

“What... wait... how?!” he said, looking around.

Discord snickered (funny word, snickered. Reminds me of snickerdoodles. Now I'm hungry,) and said, “It appears, my dear boy, that Princess Pinkie had traded places with you for the day.”

KnightMysterio made the most hilarious panic face you've ever did see. Even funnier than the Flower Trio's panic faces. “Wait... Pinkie controls the narrative now?!”

“For the next twenty-four hours in story time, yes,” Discord said, making a watch appear out of nowhere to look at it.

KnightMysterio looked dazed. “Um... I'm gonna hide... in Sugarcube Corner... because Pinkie Pie has a job to do and isn't a shirky shirkenson GOD DAMN IT PINKIE!”

Look, Knight, I promise I'll bring you back to reality once the story's over. It's my time, so I wanna have fun, okay? But I don't want my job to go undone either. You have my knowledge and skills now.

“I... wow, so that's how you work,” KnightMysterio said. “But still!”

Knight, I've seen some of your 'art' folders. I know that you'd enjoy the idea of coming here.

“T-this isn't that kind of story!” Knight protested, making an adorable blush appear on his face.

I know, I'm just teasing.

“Nggh...” KnightMysterio said, making that cute-scrunchy face I know the fans like. “Fine. Just... don't break reality too much, okay?”

Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. I promise Equestria will be mostly intact by the end of the chapter.

KnightMysterio just made a non-committal noise and went off to take my place for the day. Meanwhile, I, Princess Pinkamena Diane Pie, Ruler of Narratives and Parties, put myself back into the narrative to have the best day EVER!!

Oh. I should probably describe what I look like now, shouldn't I? Well, I pretty much look like me, but a little taller like Twilight. Plus I've got a horn and pretty wings now! They kinda make my back feel all tingly, though. Plus I gotta itch...

I rolled over on the grass and wriggled about, using the ground to scritch my itch until it went away. I stood up again and tested out my magic, picking up some rocks and juggling them.

So cool! I turned the rocks into colorful balls and began to use my hooves to juggle them, turning a Large Conveniently Placed(tm) Boulder into a pink-striped giant ball, hopping up onto it, and rolling into town! Once I got to the center of town, I flipped off of the ball, taking to the air, and launched ALL of the balls into the air, making a fireworks display! It was awesome! Trixie would have been proud of me.

“Tada!” I cheered.

“IT'S THE END TIMES!” screamed Lily.

“THE PINKPOCALYPSE HAS COME!” screamed Roseluck.

“EVERYPONY FOR THEMSELVES!” screamed Daisy.

And then they ran off, screaming in terror.

I have to say, I'm a little offended.

Applejack trotted up to me. “Hoowee,” she said (I love her accent). “Guess I shouldn't be surprised that y'chose something like this.”

I smiled happily. “I know, right?”

Applejack smiled. “What are you gonna do?” she asked. “I'm assumin' something to do with parties.”

“Well, duh,” I said, giggling. “I'm the absolute Princess of Parties now! I can't NOT hold a party!”

Applejack bit her lip. Did she have an itch? I do that sometimes when I have an itch. “Well... I'm sure it'll be interesting, to say the least.”

“I've got a lot of expectations to live up to, that's for sure!” I said. “People have been wanting this chapter a lot, I'd bet!”

Applejack gave me a confused look. I forgot sometimes that Discord and I are the only ones who can see the narrative, and even then with me it's a situational thing. Come to think of it, I think Twilight can too. After Magic Duel, she came into the iris out with me and restored my mouth...

TWILIGHT! That's right! She should probably know about this!

“I gotta go, Applejack! See you at the party?” I asked.

“Wouldn't miss it!” Applejack said, smiling. Before I teleported off, I thought I heard her mutter “Better bring the extra strong lasso...” I don't get why she'd need it. Maybe she's planning on doing some rope tricks! OOH! That'd be great! I should set up a stage for her and...

...right. Twilight.

I vanish in a flash of confetti and reappear inside the castle. I don't appear right next to her, which was weird since I was wanting to go right to her. Instead, I appear outside her lab... okay, that makes sense. She must be doing research or something and I must have subconsciously wanted not to disturb her.

Huh. Did turning into an alicorn make my brain more mature? 'Cause I have the weirdest feeling that I wouldn't have done that before, I would have just barged in and...

...yeah, definitely more mature in this form. I'm starting to look back a lot on what I did and I'm not really liking some of what I'm seeing.

I knock on the door to her lab. I wait for her, hearing the clink of bottles being put down. She opens the door and looks surprised.

“Pinkie Pie?” she said, looking me over. “You knocked?”

“Yep! Being Princess Pinkamena is making my brain more mature and stuff, I think,” I said. “Can I come in?”

“I... how is that even... Ngh... Stop it Twilight, Pinkie logic, move on,” Twilight said, looking frustrated. I pulled a cupcake out of my mane and offered it to her so she'd smile, which she did! I'm glad, because I don't like my friends having a sadface or madface. “Thank you, Pinkie,” she said, eating the cupcake. “Please, let's talk. Can I get you some tea?”

“Naaah,” I said. “That stuff gives me gas. You have chocolate milk or anything like that?”

Twilight nodded. “Sure thing. Lemme go get it,” she said, teleporting to the kitchen and reappearing with the drinks. Twilight and I walked into the lab. “So... alicorn, huh?” she asked.

I nodded. “Yepyep! I've never thrown a Princess Party as an actual princess!” I said. “I figure if I can do all sorts of cool stuff with my regular magic, I bet with an ALICORN'S magic I could do something REALLY cool!”

Twilight grinned, giving me my chocolate milk as she poured her tea. “I'll bet,” she said. “Considering how much you defy physics already, it'll probably be a party that Equestria will remember forever.”

Twilight's so nice! And so encouraging too! “Thanks, Twilight!” I said, giving her a hug and picking up my cup of milk.

I freely admit I gulped down my chocolate milk. I love chocolate milk. I convinced Discord to give me my own personal chocolate milk cotton candy raincloud a few days after he reformed. I keep it in my room! I named it Cecil Von Cloudington the Fourth.

Donkey names are so silly. Did you know that Cranky named that one changeling who attended his wedding Kevin? He's all colorful now like the rest of Thorax's changelings.

Anyway, getting off topic. “So is there anything I could help you with?” Twilight asked.

“Yeah, actually!” I said. “I was wondering if there was any spells I could borrow to make the party even more superiffitastic?”

“Superiffitastic's not a word, Pinkie,” Twilight said.

“I'mma princess now, so I say it is!” I declared.

“You're a princess for a day. I'm the Princess of Nerds forever, and I say it isn't,” Twilight countered.

I laughed, I couldn't help it. “Okay, I'm so gonna tell Rainbow Dash you said that,” I said.

Twilight laughed as well. “I think I have a few spells that will liven up your party a little,” she said. “Let me go look for them real quick.”

I nodded. “Can I help?” I asked. I noticed a spell on a torn scroll in the corner. “Ooh, hey, what's this?” All the words and stuff looked interesting. And thanks to my newly enhanced alicorn brain, I think I got how to cast them.

“No, wait, Pinkie Pie, that's the...!” Twilight said.

I didn't hear the rest of what she said. I had already started casting the spell and it sent me somewhere that I didn't know where it was.

It looked like the Everfree Forest. But that was weird, 'cause I could have sworn I was just in Ponyville. Oh well! I flew up above and looked around. The mountain looked kinda familiar, but that little rinky-dink city coming out of the side of the mountain couldn't be Canterlot. There was no castle!

Still, new friends are new friends, so I flew over to say hello to everyone!

I landed it what looked like the town square. There were Earth ponies, and pegasuseses, and unicorns... Plus there was this glowing crystal in the shape of a blue heart, and a heart-shaped flame above it. The blue heart looked kinda like the Crystal Heart... maybe there was more than one?

I shrugged, and moved on. The other ponies seemed afraid of me at first, but I sang a song to relax them. You know the one, bronies!

“My name is Pinkie Pie! And I am here to say! I'm gonna make you smile and I will brighten up your day!”

It took me a bit longer than usual to get a full chorus going, but I did! Once I was done, everyone seemed a lot happier and relaxed! I wasn't surprised. A good musical number always makes me feel better! Now that everyone wasn't afraid of me, I went to help anyone who needed it. I ended up doing a lot of manual labor, using my magic to help build houses and such.

Unicorn magic is really convenient.

I was setting up some playground equipment for some foals, when a bunch of guards came. With them were some very important looking ponies! One was an Earth pony like I am normally. She kinda reminded me of a female cheese sandwich, except with the colors reversed (brown coat, orange mane and tail). She wore a robe, and had a DELICIOUS looking fresh pudding on her head!

Pudding... head... that seems oddly important for some reason. Huh. Anyway, the others. One of them was a unicorn with the most GORGEOUS coloring! She had a curved horn, like Sombra's except not menacing, and a platinum colored coat, mane, and tail. She was wearing a beautiful cloak, like some of Rarity's best work, and a crown. There was also a pegasus there. He was a big guy, built like a fusion of Big Macintosh and Bulk Biceps, with gold-lined iron armor on! His face was scarred, and his coat was gray, his tail and mane a stark white. There was another unicorn there. He was robed like the Earth pony and the female unicorn, but he had a huge, long, curly beard, and a big, wide-brimmed hat. Like Trixie's! Except he had bells all along the brim of his hat.

I bet he's a lot of fun!

“My lady,” the bearded unicorn said, “It is the greatest honor to receive you here this day.”

Or maybe not... He and the other ponies bowed to me.

“Please don't do that,” I said. I think I'm starting to realize how Twilight feels when ponies bow to her. This didn't feel comfortable at all. “I'm only like this for the day anyway.”

The platinum unicorn looked up, confused. “For the day... a polymorphic spell has made you this way?”

“Yep! A friend of mine is running a business where he can transform you into anything he wants for a single day!” she said. “I wanted to be an alicorn! And now for the day, I'm Princess Pinkie Pie! Equestria's Royal Party Pony!”

That made all of them look up. “Equestria, you say...” the scarred pegasus said.

“Yepyep!” I said. “It's the greatest! An entire kingdom founded on friendship and harmony! And I've got lots of friends, too! Earth ponies, and pegasususes, and unicorns, and dragons, and minotaurs, and changelings, and griffons, and zebras...”

“Changelings, eh...” the pegasus said. “I was worried, as some of our advisors have been expressing anti-changeling sentiment. With that young queen recently being born, Chrysalis I think her name is, I was worried that the next generation might turn against them...”

Chrysalis? Can't be... Probably an inherited name, yeah... “I don't know about that. But changelings are everypony's friends where I come from!”

“You sound like someone I'd get along with greatly,” said the Earth pony wearing the snack on her head. “But... Equestria is really such a place? All are accepted there?”

“For the most part, yeah! My hometown, Ponyville, is really a nice place. Especially considering its near the Everfree Forest,” I said. The pegasus grinned at that, giving a smug look to the bearded unicorn.

“So Everfree CAN be Tamed...” the bearded unicorn said, stroking his beard. “Most interesting...”

“We do get the occasional monster attack,” I said, “but me and my friends can deal with them.”

The pegasus nodded. “So you and your friends are monster hunters?”

“Nope! I plan parties, and my other friends are an animal caretaker, a professional racer and weather manager, a fashion designer, an apple farmer, and a librarian!” I clarified.

The platinum unicorn looked confused. “Fashion... designer?” she asked.

“She makes clothes! I have the most beautiful dress made by her... and she's so nice and generous, too! Always willing to lend a hoof!” I said.

The Earth pony giggled. “Sounds like you have interesting friends...”

“It really is! And my librarian friend? She actually became an alicorn for realsies! Not because of a spell, but because she earned it for being so awesome!” I said.

That startled all of them. “Tell me...” the bearded pony said. “Who rules Equestria?”

I blinked. Did they really not know? “Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, of course! Princess Celestia's so very wise and smart... She taught my librarian friend about the magic of friendship!”

The bearded unicorn scoffed. “Don't be so quick to dismiss it,” the platinum unicorn said, grinning and looking at me. “What of 'Princess' Luna?”

That was a weird way of saying Princess... Huh. Anyway. “Oh, she guards everypony's dreams! She raises the moon every night, and keeps watch over the dreamscape!”

The Earth pony cackled. “I knew those two fillies had a lot of potential!” she said.

“Huh?” I asked, confused. “Anyway, there's also the Crystal Empire in the north.”

“An empire in the north?” the pegasus asked, looking worried.

“No, it's really a nice place!” I said, not wanting him to be concerned. “It's ruled by an alicorn of love, and kept warm and cozy by this thing called the Crystal Heart! Kinda looks like that crystal under the heart-shaped fire.”

“Four...” the platinum unicorn said breathlessly.

“Five, now,” I clarified. “She had a baby recently!”

The four important-looking ponies began to chat among themselves. Their faces were all smiles, and they looked like their day was going well because of what I said.

I'm glad! I like it when I can make ponies happy! At that point, though, magical sparks started dancing around me.

“What's going on?!” the bearded unicorn asked.

“I'm being called back to where I came from, I think!” I said. “Byebye! It was nice meeting you all!”

“Princess... Know that on this day, you have given us all hope when our doubts were flagging! Equestria stands!” the bearded unicorn said. And that was the last thing I heard before I was called back, reappearing in Twilight's lab.

“Pinkie, are you all right!?” she asked, hugging me. “What happened? Where did you go?”

I grinned. “I dunno, but I made some new friends! There was this Earth pony with a pudding on his head, a big ol' pegasus with a scarred face and some really cool-looking armor, a unicorn with a beautiful platinum coat, and a unicorn with bells on his hat and this really epic beard!”

Twilight's jaw dropped. She'd better close it quick, otherwise she might catch bugs!

“Huh?” I asked.

“Pinkie... You went back in time... and met three of the founders of Equestria...” Twilight said.

“Really?” I said. And then it all clicked. “Oh wow! I met Chancellor Puddinghead, Commander Hurricane, and Princess Platinum! And that must mean the bearded unicorn was...”

“Starswirl the Bearded!!!” Twilight squeed, grinning so widely it looked like her head had developed a fliptop. “Oooh, you have to tell me about him. What was he like?!”

“Pretty formal,” I said. “I didn't have that much time to talk with him.”

“Oh...” Twilight said, looking disappointed. She brightened up again, though. “Still! Pinkie, this means that you inadvertantly played a part in Equestrian hisory!”

I grinned. “Wow... that's cool!”

“Can you tell me anything more about the Founders?” Twilight asked.

I thought for a moment. “Actually, can I wait until the party tonight? I think the others are gonna want to hear about this too!”

“Good point!” Twilight said.

“Great! See you then!” I said. Okay Knight, you can have the narrative back.

Thank you. Okay. As Pinkie Pie hopped off to finish planning her party, Starlight Glimmer poked her head in. “Did I hear right?” she asked. “Did Pinkie really go to pre-Equestria Equestria?”

Twilight giggled. “Yep! She never ceases to amaze me,” she said. “She's going to tell us about it at the party she's throwing tonight!”

Starlight looked thoughtful. “Then I better go get my 'costume' for it,” she said.

Twilight blinked. “Planning on using your freebie?” she asked.

Starlight nodded. “And I think I know what I want to try being.

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next up: Starlight transforms!

Author's Note

Well, that was a weird one, wasn't it? And that's how Equestria was made!

Alicorn won that one with 28% of 280 votes!

Starlight's turn is next! What will she be for the party?

Click here and vote!

Customer 6: Rarity

Discord's New Business
Customer 6: Rarity
by Jonathan 'KnightMysterio' Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“Amused?” Discord asked, Lyra giggling as the newly human unicorn flexed her hands.

“Very! Hands are SO cool!” she said. She looked down at her outfit, a pink top and blue miniskirt, with magenta boots and hairband. “Why the clothes, though?”

“Proprietary thing,” Discord said. “Humans don't have tails or covering fur, so they wear clothes instead to keep their naughty bits out of view.”

“And to keep warm, apparently,” Lyra said. “Feels weird not to have fur.”

Discord chuckled. “Plus, I gave you the outfit the you in the other world wears,” he said.

“Nice!” Lyra said, tugging at the clothes. “Thanks, Dissy!” She waved to Discord and ran off. She tripped over herself almost immediately, but quickly got the hang of her legs after picking herself up.

“Dissy, huh...” Discord said thoughtfully. “I like it!”

Quite possibly the most elegant pony in Ponyville trotted up to the stand. “Discord, darling,” Rarity said, smiling from beneath her sun hat. “How are you today?”

“Business is booming,” Discord said, some fireworks shooting up into the air behind him. “Seems everypony in town wants to try being something else.”

Rarity giggled. “Well, it is a fascinating opportunity,” she said. “And aside from a few incidents, it seems to be going well.”

“Has your sister's fur grown back yet?” Discord asked.

Rarity snickered. “Yes. And she's forgiven Scootaloo, thankfully,” she said. “But speaking on that, I've come to claim my free transformation.”

Discord nodded. “What'll it be?” he asked.

Rarity removed her hat. “Well... I think I'd like to try being a Diamond Dog,” she said.

Discord blinked. “...Congratulations. You're now one of the only beings in the history of EVER who've caught me off-guard.” He grinned, adding, “And yes, that's a very good thing.” He leaned forward, smirking. “SO! Diamond Dog. Why not dragon? Maybe reverse the dynamic between you and dear Spikey-wikey?”

“Honestly,” Rarity said, “it's be a little unfair to Spike to become a dragon while he's a pony. Perhaps I might change into that later, once the transformation is reverted, but as for now... Well, why be obvious? Be adventurous, try new things, that's what I say!”

“You've just described one of my personal philosophies in life,” Discord said. “And honestly, my dear, while Princess Pinkiecorn's party last night left me in a good mood, your little declaration just now has put me into a fantastic one!”

He snapped his talons, and Rarity found herself suddenly getting fuzzier. Her body shifted, becoming more canine in appearance, her muzzle shifting and gaining more pointed teeth as her head became canine. Her ears changed shape, becoming longer and floppier, her hooves turning into thick paws, her forepaws becoming like wide scoops. Her vision blurred slightly, but her nose became much more powerful in response. Her mane, much to her relief, stayed the same, expanding into a full head of hair. Her tail shifted, becoming long and whiplike, her nose turning black and moist. A diamond-studded collar appeared around her neck, a light blue vest flying out of her shop and wrapping itself around her chest.

“Oh! Thank you, darling!” she said. “I was JUST thinking of what might go with this. Perhaps a nice yellow scarf rather than the collar, though...”

Discord snapped his talons again, the collar changing to a scarf. Rarity grinned. “Thank you, Discord.”

Discord nodded. “Anytime,” he said. Rarity giggled, and began sniffing the air, testing her newfound super-enhanced sense of smell.

“Oh... Oh my, what's this?” she said, sniffing all around. “I knew dogs had a fine sense of smell, but...” A rainbow of scents was hitting Rarity now, each painting a different picture for her. In one direction, she could smell the musk of construction ponies building a new home. In another, the sweet smell of apples coming from the Acres. The smell of Spoiled Rich's perfume came from the riztier part of Ponyville. Rarity gagged a little. Spoiled tended to overdose on perfume, but to Rarity's senses now, even at this distance, it was disturbingly unpleasant.

So many scents! So much to investigate. Her nose twitched in the air as she gallumphed off to investigate them.

Discord just chuckled, turning his attention to his next customer.

Rarity, meanwhile, was trotting around town, giggling and sniffing everything. “Oh, my my my,” she said as she found herself drawn towards the smells coming from the nearby restaurants. A particular one caught her attention. “A hint of vanilla. Hm. Sweet... salty... Oh, what is that?” She sniffed about, lowering her head to the ground to try and follow the scent. She snuffled about, not caring that dirt was getting on her face as she tracked down to scent.

It was her sister, her mane still short from the previous incident with Scootaloo. She was sitting on a bench, munching a blue ice cream bar of some kind. “Sweetie Belle?” Rarity called out.

The pink-haired filly looked up at the strangely familiar diamond dog. “...Rarity?” she asked.

Rarity wagged her tail. “Indeed!” she said.

Sweetie blinked, grinning. “Wow, I would have sworn you'd go for dragon,” she said.

Rarity smiled. “Oh, why be obvious?” she said. “What is that you've got there? It smells fantastic!”

Sweetie looked down at the ice cream she was eating. “Oh! It's sea salt ice cream!”

“Sea... salt... ice cream?” Rarity said curiously. “How odd...”

Sweetie Belle pointed. “Mr. Orange Dream over there sells novelty ice cream flavors!” she said, pointing to the stallion, a relative newcomer to the town. His coat was orange with a white mane and tail, and he had a bowl of ice cream with a pair of chocolate chip cookies in it as his cutie mark.

“How odd,” Rarity said.

Sweetie Belle smiled. “I can get another, if you want to try it,” she said.

“Thank you, dear! I would!” Rarity said, sitting down next to her. Sweetie quickly ran over and bought another ice cream bar, giving it to her sister. After fumbling with the stick due to her large, clumsy hands, she managed to get a hold of it.

Rarity slurped the ice cream bar with her long, canine tongue, and tittered. “Oh, that's delightful!” she said, eagerly licking at her treat.

Sweetie Belle watched her sister with amusement as she ate, the Diamond Dog's ears bobbing back and forth in amusement. Getting an idea, she stood up on the bench, reaching up to rub at Rarity's ears.

“Sweetie, what are you... Oooh, that's nice...” Rarity began to lean over, wurfing happily as Sweetie used her hooftips to scratch behind her ears. She kept leaning over, enjoying the tingling sensation, until she leaned over so far that she fell. “Uwaaa!”

Sweetie, having dodged out of the way to the much larger Diamond Dog didn't fall on her, eeped. “Rarity, are you okay?”

Rarity giggled, dusting herself off. “Minor scuffs, nothing more,” she said. She looked at the dust still on her coat, and chuckled. “It's strange... As a pony, I was always so obsessed with dirt and grime. But now I've got dust all over me and I don't care a wit.”

Sweetie giggled. “Doggies are always kinda messy,” she said. “Probably why you won't let me have one.”

“Ohh, that reminds me,” Rarity said, an idea occurring to her. “I should probably avoid Opal for the rest of the day... Darling would you take care of her?”

Sweetie Belle nodded. “Sure! Me and the girls will take her to the clubhouse,” she said.

“No grooming sessions,” Rarity admonished.

“We only did that once...” Sweetie grumbled.

Rarity chuckled, and picked up Sweetie Belle to give her a hug. An amused whim hit Rarity, and she kissed her. The way a dog would kiss.

“Heehee!” Sweetie said, squirming as Rarity licked her. “Rarity, c'mon!”

“Sorry, dear, I couldn't resist,” she said, setting Sweetie down. “See you later?”

Sweetie nodded. “Sure thing, sis!” Rarity smiled, and trotted off. Another scent caught her attention, a strong, musky scent that had her blushing. She snuffled the ground, following it again. Ponies stared at Rarity as she followed the scent. “Whomever this is, they smell fantastic,” she said, mainly to herself.

Eventually, she came to the source of the scent: Spike.

The purple unicorn was running errands for Twilight, buying spell components and new quills. A mischievous idea occurred to Rarity, her tail wagging happily. Glancing around, making sure Spike hadn't noticed her yet, she decided to test out her new digging claws. She quickly dug a hole behind a bush, her paws acting like big shovels to easily move the dirt aside. She ducked down into the hole, waiting to see if Spike would walk by.

“Let's see...” Spike said, levitating a checklist out of his saddlebags. “Star root... Star spider webbing... Candied stardust... extra quills and scrolls...” He smiled. “Yep, that's everything!” He was silently glad that he decided to go back to working as Twilight's assistant. “Okay. Back to the castle.”

He turned down the alley Rarity was hiding in, heading for home. Before he got to far, however...

“WRRARRF!!” Rarity shouted, jumping out of her hiding hole and tackling Spike to the ground. She giggled, licking his face over and over.

“Hey!” Spike sputtered, not realizing who it was yet. He thought a big dog had knocked him over and was being friendly. “C'mon, down girl!” He chuckled, looking up. When he saw that familiar, yet so very different face, he blinked. “R-Rarity?!”

Rarity licked him again and giggled. “Ahah! I have you now, pony!” she teased. “Now I take you to my den and make you dig up gems for me all day!”

A smirk crossed Spike's face. “Isn't that already our relationship?” he teased.

Rarity started to snark back, but paused, thinking about it. A dismayed look crossed her face. “Good heavens, it is...”

Spike chuckled as Rarity backed off, letting him get up. “I don't mind, honestly,” he said. “I just enjoy being with you.”

Rarity beamed, wagging her tail.

“Okay, that's just freakin' adorable,” Spike said. Rarity giggled. Spike smiled at her, and asked, “So... Diamond Dog, huh?”

Rarity nodded. “I was initially going to go with dragon, but I realized that it would be unfair to you while you were still transformed,” she said.

Spike thought for a moment, and nodded. “Okay, I can see that,” he said. “You want to hang out for a while?”

Rarity grinned. “I certainly wouldn't mind the company!” she said. “There's so many fun SMELLS to investigate! And who knew that digging could be so much fun?”

Spike chuckled. “You should probably fill in that hole you made,” he said, pointing.

Rarity blushed, going to do just that. “Right, right, sorry...” she said, quickly scooping the dirt back in and patting it down tight.

Spike smiled. “I just have to drop these back off at the castle,” he said. “Twilight's thinking about sending Starlight to the Crystal Empire with Sunburst, but wants to do a few tests first.”

“Did they determine how long she'll have to be a changeling queen?” Rarity asked.

“The local changelings say that Chrysalis usually took about a year to gestate before laying her eggs, and it was another month after that before they hatched,” Spike said. “They also said it might be different since it's a hybrid.”

Rarity shook her head. “Rather a messy situation, isn't it...”

Spike nodded. “I'm sure it'll work out, though,” he said. “Meet you here, later?”

Rarity blinked as the wind shifted, a new set of scents reaching her. She sniffed the air curiously. “We'll meet at... hm...” She stepped out into the street, sniffing around. “...Fluttershy's place. We'll meet there.”

“Why there?” Spike asked.

“Just caught some interesting scents... I REALLY want to know where they're coming from,” she said, trotting off.

Spike blinked, watching her go, and shrugged, going to make his delivery.

Rarity, for her part, was following the scents wafting through the air curiously. She mentally tried to sort them all out. “Let's see... pizza parlor, no... Spoiled again, good heavens that's toxic... Trash dumpster...” She paused at the dumpster, sniffing at it. Several tasty scents were coming from it. “NO! No, Rarity, do not give in. Dog you may be, you must still maintain some standards!”

She glanced back at the dumpster, her tail wagging unconsciously. “...Although whatever is in there does smell yummy.” She quickly shook her head, and went back to following the scent that attracted her attention.

Briefly, she stopped in front of Discord's stand, sniffing him, the draconequus wearing her discarded hat from earlier.

“You smell weird,” she said after a moment. She was unable to find any other word describe his bizarre scent.

“Thank you,” Discord said, smiling pleasantly.

Rarity blinked, and shrugged, moving on. Eventually, she made her way to Fluttershy's cottage, a grin crossing her face. So many amazing scents here. She hopped about, sniffing at every animal. Several of them backed away fearfully, unsure of what to make of this goofy, happy dog-person that was sniffing about them.

For her part, Rarity was having a blast. All these smells were so interesting! Who knew that there could be so much fascination found in SMELLS?

Angel glared at the intruder dog, and hopped inside, going to where Fluttershy was relaxing on her couch and reading a book.

“Oh, hello Angel,” the pegasus said. “I was just thinking... Maybe I should become a draconequus again? Discord did seem to like how I looked, and I have been feeling closer to him lately...”

Angel rolled his eyes, as if to say, “Yeah, sure, that's nice, we got bigger problems now.” He tugged on Fluttershy's tail, pointing outside.

“Hm? What's wrong?” Fluttershy asked. And then she heard the distress from her animals, and the sound of an animal wurfing and barking happily. “Oh. A doggie must have gotten up to the cottage,” she said, smiling warmly. “It happens sometimes.”

Angel insistently pointed towards the outside.

“You're right,” Fluttershy said. “I should escort the pooch back home.” She went outside... and blinked, taken aback by the white Diamond Dog hopping back and forth, sniffing at her animals and freaking them out.

“Um... hello?” she said nervously.

The Diamond Dog turned, and grinned widely. “Fluttershy!” she said in a familiar voice. “Your cottage smells AMAZING!”

Fluttershy blinked, recognizing the voice. “R-Rarity?” she said, worried. Angel's jaw dropped in shock.

Rarity blinked, recovering herself. “Terribly sorry, darling,” she said, blushing and taking a more demure stance. “But this is all rather new to me. And quite thrilling!” Her ears perked. “And now that I've calmed down...” She leaned to one side. “Hearing as well? Oh, this IS delightful!”

Fluttershy blinked, and smiled realizing what was going on. “You chose Diamond Dog as your transformation?”

Rarity nodded. “Yes! How do I look?” she said, posing.

Fluttershy giggled. “Like a cute little doggy,” she said. Angel, at that point, just gave up and went back inside, heading for his bed.

Rarity beamed, wagging her tail. “I was worried I'd look as brutish as the pack that lived out in the quarry, but I think I look rather fetching! Discord even provided a nice outfit for me.”

Fluttershy grinned. “He really can be nice when he wants to be,” she said. “Would you like to come inside?”

“If it's no trouble? I promised Spike I'd meet him here,” she said.

Fluttershy nodded. “No trouble,” she said. “I don't have tea, but I do have snacks. And some fish, if you want.”

Rarity blinked.

Fluttershy smiled. “You're a canine,” she said. “Canines need meat.”

Rarity nodded slowly. “I suppose that makes sense... It's just... it's hard to imagine you fishing...”

Fluttershy sighed. “Not all of my critters are content with grass and flowers,” she said. “I fish to help predators that are injured, and all the meat-eaters that live here have agreed not to hunt on the grounds.”

“Dear me,” Rarity said softly.

“Nature is what it is,” Fluttershy said, shrugging. “It's full of beauty, but there's a harsh price to maintain that beauty.”

“...Never let anyone call you weak again, darling,” Rarity said.

The two went inside, Rarity sitting down on the couch while Fluttershy retrieved the snacks. Rarity, meanwhile, just listened to the sounds outside, marveling at how clear and intense the sounds were. With some effort, she could tell the difference between the footsteps of each critter as they gamboled about Fluttershy's property. She could even hear the vocalizations of animals that she previously thought didn't make much sound, such as rabbits.

Fluttershy came in a few minutes later, smiling apologetically, balancing a plate of snacks on her head. “Here we are,” she said, setting down the tray of snacks, including several cookies and a small bag of fish jerky.

“You're a dear,” Rarity said, looking down at the jerky. Cautiously, she took a piece out of the bag and sniffed it. “Certainly smells good...” Popping the jerky in her mouth, she chewed it thoughtfully. “Hm... That's... that's not bad, actually... Texture's rather unlike anything I've ever eaten but... It's not unpleasant.”

Fluttershy smiled. “Are you enjoying yourself, Rarity?”

Rarity giggled. “Very much so,” she said. “My eyesight's a little worse, but the sense of hearing and smell more than make up for it. Once Spike arrives, he and I are going to go digging!”

Fluttershy blinked. “Oh?”

Rarity held up her hands. “It's amazing at how good these paws are at digging holes! It explains so much of how the Dogs were able to mess with us that time.”

Fluttershy shivered. “That was really scary...”

Rarity giggled. “Oh, it wasn't so bad. Granted, I had to debase myself a little to exploit their sensitive hearing, but I held my own well enough.”

There was a knocking on the door. “Rarity? Fluttershy?”

“Ah!” Rarity said. “Come in, dear Spike!”

Spike opened the door, smiling at the two of them. “Ready to go?” he said, holding up a picnic basket in his magic.

Rarity giggled. “Ever the gentleman,” she said. “And yes. I was thinking we'd go to the old gem quarry. With Rover's pack moved out, it should be all right.”

Spike frowned, confused. “Okay, but there's more romantic spots...”

Rarity smiled. “Truthfully? I really want to see how I do at digging,” she said.

Spike shrugged. “Whatever milady wants,” he said, bowing grandly. Fluttershy giggled.

“Excellent!” she said. “Let's be off, then! Tallyho!”

Spike and Rarity left, Fluttershy sighing contentedly. They really were cute together.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Later...
The quarry...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Rainbow Dash was heading home for the day, having finished her duties. She had Wonderbolt practice in the next couple of days, and wanted to be ready for it. As she passed over the quarry, she saw Spike laying on a picnic blanket, seemingly by himself.

“What's he doing out there?” she said. She was about to call out to him when a familiar mane popped out of the ground, attached to a Diamond Dog's head. “What the...”

She ducked behind a nearby cloud, watching, as Rarity emerged from the ground, a large red gemstone held in her teeth like a tennis ball. She giggled, shaking the excess dust off of herself, Spike shielding the picnic with his magic.

“How about this one, Spike?” Rarity said, dropping the gem. She wagged her tail excitedly as Spike looked it over carefully.

“I think... Hmm...” He set it down. “It's just a regular ruby. But it's a real high quality one.”

Rarity clapped her paws excitedly. “Oh, this is so much fun! Like a scavenger hunt!”

Spike chuckled. “I'm glad you're enjoying yourself,” he said, pouring tea for the both of them.

Rainbow Dash just stared, stunned. “Rarity... as a Diamond Dog...” she said. “Having FUN digging around in the dirt.” She made a 'mind-blown' gesture with her hooves, sitting back on the cloud she was hiding behind. “Geez... RARITY got ahead of me on something. I'm never gonna live this down...”

She glanced back at Rarity and Spike, the two chatting amiably, neither of them in their proper forms. “To heck with it,” she said. “I am NOT gonna be the last of our friends to do this.” She zipped into town, heading for Discord's stand.

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Rainbow Dash transforms!

Author's Note

WOW.

There was a literal battle for first place here. But in the end, Diamond Dog won out over Dragon with a whopping 41% of 444 votes! Dragon came in a VERY close second with 39% of the vote. The vote was so close that I'm gonna post a non-canon version of this chapter showing the dragon result tomorrow.

Thank you all SO MUCH for participating in these polls! It really means a lot to me that people are so invested in this story!

Anyway. Next up, Rainbow Dash's chapter! Vote for what she'll turn into here! I'm actually pretty excited, as the Diamond Dog votes came out of literally nowhere.

Second Visit: Rarity

Discord's New Business
Second Visit: Rarity
by Jonathan 'KnightMysterio' Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Rainbow Dash zipped up to Discord as he was packing up his stand. “Hey!” she said. “I'm ready to get transformed.”

“I'm closed for the evening,” Discord said, not turning to look at her.

“Aw, c'mon!” Rainbow Dash protested, annoyed. “You do transformations just by snapping your wiggly hoof thingies!”

“They're called 'fingers,'” Discord said, amused.

“WHATEVER!” Rainbow Dash said. “I just wanna be changed into something cool!”

Discord stroked his beard thoughtfully after he finished folding up his stand into a briefcase. “...All right then,” he said. “What would you like to be?”

“I dunno,” Rainbow Dash said. “Something totally awesome!”

“That's not helpful,” Discord said. “You and I have completely different ideas of what awesome is!”

“And that's cool!” Rainbow Dash said. “I completely respect that! Which is why I trust you to change me into something that totally ROCKS!”

Discord grinned evilly. “Ooooh, that's a dangerous thing to say to me in a situation like this,” he said. “You truly trust me?”

Rainbow Dash nodded.

Discord smirked. “Well, I suppose I could turn you into a zombie, which would leave you a mindless, shuffling mass of rotting meat in constant pain. Or I could turn you into a Smooze! That would leave you barely sapient and incapable of speech. Also, my buddy the green Smooze would probably want to merge with you. I could turn you into a Stay Puft Marshmallow Mare, but then you'd be completely edible. And kids LOVE marshmallows. Perhaps I could turn you into a zoomfish, the fastest fish in the seas, but the seaponies find them incredibly delicious. I could turn you into a ghoul, but then you'd have a constant hunger for the flesh of other ponies. Then there's...”

“Um...” Rainbow Dash said, having gone visibly pale from Discord's suggestions. “Perhaps, something twenty percent cooler? And less abomination-y?”

“...Honestly surprised you know that word,” Discord said, grinning when Rainbow Dash made a grumpy noise. “Let's see... Twenty percent cooler... I know! I could turn you into a shoggoth!”

“...That does sound cool,” Rainbow Dash said. “What is it?”

“A cosmic abomination that drives anyone who looks at it insane!” Discord chirped.

“OH COME ON!!” Rainbow Dash said, frustrated. “Work with me here!”

“No, you work with me!” Discord said, visibly annoyed. “Do you have any idea how FRUSTRATING it is for a vendor to get a vague order like that?”

“I don't understand,” Rainbow Dash said after a moment.

“Not everyone has the same taste as you do, Rainbow Dash!” Discord said. “You think Daring Do is cool? I have beheld horrifically dangerous creatures that would turn Miss Do into a smear! Seen sights so wondrous, so beautiful, that Daring Do would simply DIE from the sheer glory of them!” He shook his head. “Everypony's different, Rainbow Dash. Everypony likes different things. It's especially hard if they don't KNOW YOU. You want awesome? I guarantee you that one hundred ponies out of one hundred will have a completely different idea of what awesome is from you. Twenty percent cooler doesn't help. How do you measure coolness? How do you measure awesomeness? Is there a scientific method to it? Can they be taught in a class?”

“I...” Rainbow Dash stammered. If it had been anyone else, the lecture would have flown over her head as boring. But Discord, his pupils reduced to glowing red slits, was scaring her right now, forcing her to pay attention.

“Just saying 'awesome' means nothing to me,” Discord said, putting on Rarity's hat. “You need to be specific, or I swear to Chaos Itself the next time you come to me with vague wishes like that I will turn you into a parasprite for a week. PICK SOMETHING. Or never bother me with it again!”

He snapped his fingers, teleporting away.

Rainbow Dash just stared at the spot Discord used to be. And in a rare moment of thoughtfulness, she flew off to think.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
The next day...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“You're back already?” Discord said, surprised.

“Indeed,” Rarity said. “Freshly showered after my experience, and honestly ready for more.”

“Enjoyed being a Diamond Dog, eh?” Discord said, leaning over his stand.

Rarity giggled. “Oh, it was delightful. So many new sensations. And who knew digging could be so much fun? Transforming yourself is so exhilarating!”

Discord grinned. “I always love hearing about ponies enjoying new experiences,” he said. “Now, what will it be this time?”

Rarity smiled. “I think I will be a dragon this time,” she said.

Discord blinked. “Really? I thought you said yesterday...”

“Spike and I talked,” Rarity interrupted. “And he's fine with it. And truthfully, I am curious.”

Discord chuckled. “Very well. And shall I assume that you'll want to stay a dragon as long as Spike stays a pony?”

Rarity nodded. “Certainly, darling,” she said. “I'm prepared to pay for the extra days.”

“In the spirit of generosity and the fact that Pinkiecorn's party the other day has me in a tremendously good mood, I'm willing to waive the fee,” Discord said, pulling out a paper and pushing it forward, making a quill manifest out of thin air. “Sign here, please.”

Rarity blinked, looking at the paper. “What's this?”

“Standard issue 'Not my fault if things go wrong form.' Dragon's a high end transformation and to legally cover my ever-shifting booty...” Discord said.

“Thank you, Discord, now I'm going to have the image of a shapeshifting butt in my head all day,” Rarity snarked.

Discord snorted laughter. “Sign the thing. It's for legal purposes.”

“Fair enough, I suppose,” Rarity said. “I remember you telling us about these now.” She picked up the form with her magic, and used the quill to sign it. “There we are.”

Discord snapped his fingers. In a flash of light, Rarity started to change. Her fur hardened, becoming diamond-hard scales, her body lengthening as her hooves became powerful, gripping claws. Her purple, curly tail became a long, whip-like appendage with a diamond-shaped spike at the end. Wings sprouted from her back, as a line of purple spikes went up her tail and spine, cresting and curling over her head in the form her mane used to be. Her muzzle extended, filling with fangs.

“I... oh, this feels weird...” Rarity said, looking herself over. She had become taller as well, a little taller than Dragon Lord Ember. “But it also feels REALLY good!” She flexed, grinning.

Discord chuckled. “Yes, I do suppose gaining firebreath, wings, near invincibility, and extra muscle would feel good, now wouldn't it?” He made himself more muscular, flexing and grunting.

Rarity giggled. “Well, I do thank you, darling,” she said. “This should be an interesting week.” She strode off, walking easily through town.

Well, this is most exciting! she thought. I wonder how Spikey-wikey will react when he sees me? She walked easily through the town, watching everypony as they trotted. She waved to the ponies who recognized her, chatting amiably with them.

Applejack was walking around the corner, thinking about Iron Will's offer, when she noticed Rarity, dropping the bushel of apples she was carrying. “Whoa there...”

“Applejack, darling!” Rarity said. “How are you today?”

“Um...” Applejack said. “Just fine. Wow, you're big...”

Rarity giggled. “I suppose Discord made me the size to match my age as a dragon,” she said. “Really, I think I look rather fabulous, don't you?” She smiled toothily, posing and spreading her impressive wingspan.

Applejack meeped. Being this close to an adult dragon, even if it was her friend, was unsettling. “Um... sure thing, Rarity.”

Rarity helped Applejack pick up her apples. “There you are,” she said.

Applejack nodded. “So... what's your plans for the day?”

Rarity giggled. “Well, I'm going to try out my wings, of course. Maybe take Spike flying with me,” she said. “And of course, I've always wondered what gems taste like, after seeing Spike eat them so many times.”

Applejack nodded. “That's fair,” she said. “See you later, then?”

Rarity nodded. “Certainly,” she said. “Have a good day, Applejack.”

“You too, Rares,” Applejack said, shaking her head. “Yeesh. Two transformations... maybe I should turn minotaur again. That Iron Will feller's a reasonable sort...”

Rarity watched Applejack go, finding her gaze drawn to Applejack's muscular flanks. So firm, so tight... and her hind legs were so deliciously muscular...

Rarity shook her head. “Goodness,” she said. “I don't know WHAT is coming over me.”

She started off again, heading out to look for Spike again. She truly did want him to see her like this, all sleek and elegant.

Speaking of sleek, dat Big Macintosh flank... Rarity watched as Big Macintosh hauled a large cart full of spun hay through the town. His muscular legs pumped easily, hauling that heavy cart as if it were nothing. Powerful muscles, a toned flank... and such a gentleman, too. Quiet, thoughtful, intelligent...

Rarity shook her head. “Stop it,” she said to herself. “You are a lady. You don't have a wandering eye-yai-yai...”

Zecora was walking through town, buying ingredients for her potions. She moved with an ease and grace that always fascinated Rarity. And there was always such an exotic air about her. Not just because she was the only zebra in town, but because she always held an air of mystery. She fascinated Rarity at times...

Rarity shook her head, trying to clear it. “No. I will not stare at the pretties like I was some lonely construction worker,” she said, strutting off, holding her head high.

She got about five steps before something else caught her attention.

Filthy Rich and Spoiled Rich were arguing again. The two had been doing that a lot since Diamond Tiara had learned how to stand up to Spoiled. Filthy was supportive of her daughter's new, kinder personality, while Spoiled was against it, thinking that Diamond was making herself weak. As for this argument, Spoiled seemed to give up quickly, walking off in a huff. Filthy shook his head sadly and went about his business.

Rarity's long, powerful tail flicked back and forth as she considered Filthy. He was a bit older than she usually liked, but he was handsome. Obviously good with kids, since Diamond Tiara clearly adored him. And he definitely had the patience of a god if he stayed with Spoiled this long...

Rarity shook her head. “What in the WORLD is the matter with me?” she said, thinking out loud. “I keep thinking of all these lovely ponies as pretty pretty treasures...”

“I suppose it does have a rustic sort of charm,” said a voice Rarity knew. “But still, I don't know what you see in it.”

“No...” Rarity said in dismay, going over to the source of the voice.

Sure enough, Prince Blueblood was there. And with him was Fancy Pants, the two on a walking tour of Ponyville.

Fancy Pants smiled. “It's not so much the area as it is the ponies, my friend,” he said. “Look around. Everypony here just feels more 'real' than they do in Canterlot. More honest, and less superficial. You'd have to go to the lower districts to get that in Canterlot but here? Everypony we've met has wished us a good day and MEANT IT.”

“Hm... Well, you're not wrong about Canterlot elite superficiality,” Blueblood conceded. “And certainly the common carnival fare at that apple stand is far better than I expected it to be...”

So handsome... Rarity thought dreamily. Both of them were well built hunks. Blueblood trained with the guards on weekend as sport, and Fancy Pants was a skilled fencer. Their white coats were immaculate, they dressed well... Blueblood was arrogant, but he was also as loyal as Rainbow Dash. And Fancy Pants... goodness, he was almost everything she could want in a stallion. She envied Fleur, his confidant, so much at times...

“Such pretty, pretty treasures...” Rarity said, licking her muzzle lustfully. “Perfect for my hoard...” She had to have them. And not just them. There were so many pretty, wonderful stallions and mares out there.

She would have them all. “Mine...”

“Um, Rarity?” Bulk Biceps said, tugging on her tail. “You've kinda grown...”

Rarity looked down... and blinked. She really had grown larger, tall enough to be able to look over the tops of the houses in town. “So I have,” she said. She looked at Bulk again, a slow smile spreading over her face. So much muscle... and a fine masseuse...

Bulk blinked. “Should I run?”

“A bit too late for that, darling,” she said, reaching a taloned hand down for him.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Meanwhile...
Twilight's Palace...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Four royals were having tea. Celestia, Luna, and Twilight were meeting with Dragon Lord Ember, the blue dragoness having come over that morning to visit.

“This is good,” Ember said. “I always thought tea was sort of a sissy drink before.”

Celestia smiled. “It's all in the blends,” she said. “I'm glad things are going well in the Dragonlands.”

Ember grinned. “Yeah. Dragons are actually pretty easy to govern, since most of us keep to ourselves. It's why I had the free time to come visit.”

Spike, who was serving the four of them, grinned. “It's good to have you here, Ember,” he said, giving her a small bowl of gems. “From my private stock.”

“Thanks,” Ember said, shaking her head at the dragon-turned-unicorn. “Eesh... Transformations... Dunno if I could do it.”

“Discord's been behaving himself... mostly...” Luna said. “And aside from the fiasco with Starlight turning herself into a Chrysalis-type Changeling Queen, nothing too severe has happened.”

Ember nodded. “Which brings me to some questions I had...”

Twilight nodded. “Ask away,” she said. “Your insights on how to give Spike a hoard without him going through Greedgrowth Insanity were invaluable.”

Ember nodded slowly. “It's the fact that you have so many villains as friends now. I asked around earlier... That stage magician that lives on the outskirts of the village, Trixie, she took over the town, once?”

Twilight nodded. “If you're thinking she's not being punished, she is. She has a guard shadowing her at all times. As she's just arrogant, she's been judged relatively harmless. Every magical curio shop in Equestria has been informed of her, however.”

“Hnh... I suppose that makes sense. But there's still the matter of Discord, the changelings, and Starlight herself. Changelings were a problem even for the dragons, for one thing. They could only impersonate dragons as young as me, but still.”

“We've since discovered that Chrysalis was keeping her entire hive half-starved and emaciated. The hunger, which never truly went away in their old forms by all accounts, drove them to aggression. The changelings, as they stand now, are self-sustaining and all much more stable in personality,” Celestia said.

“And it helps that no one was really hurt by them beyond being stuffed in cocoons,” Luna said. “Apparently they operated on a catch and release system so as to avoid suspicion. From what the current King, Thorax, has told us, Chrysalis was dangerously insane from her constant starvation and grew ambitious.”

“We were lucky...” Twilight said softly. “If there were deaths during the raid on Canterlot, or more serious injuries, then integrating the changelings into society would be much harder...”

Ember looked thoughtful, munching on some gems. “I can accept that, I suppose,” she said. “What about the other two? The older dragons still fear Discord's name, and I've heard a lot about what Starlight did...”

“Starlight's... complicated...” Twilight said. “Her reason for starting her cult seemed petty at first, but I looked into it. Her home life was... it wasn't pleasant. Her father wasn't the kind type, let's say.”

Luna frowned. “A child abuser?” she said angrily.

“He's long since been punished for his crime, although his actions did contribute to Starlight's neurosis,” Twilight said. “As for Starlight herself...” She sighed. “She was able to match me, an alicorn and the Element of Magic, in direct combat and is absolutely brilliant at spell innovation. I don't think there's a cell in Equestria that could hold her for long. Rehabilitating her and getting her on our side was the safest option.”

Celestia nodded in agreement. “In addition, Discord's a force of nature. He cannot be killed. Imprisoning him away would always be temporary, and his escapes always result in him lashing out. The best thing I can say about him in the bad old days is that he never took a life...”

Luna sipped her tea. “We concede it was dangerous, Lord Ember,” she said. “But again, the long-term benefits of befriending him, teaching him the value of friendship and harmony, far outweigh the temporary reprieve imprisoning him would give.”

“Better to worry about a friendly prank than reality turning sideways on us,” Celestia added. “I've spent centuries teaching Equestria to be a forgiving, loving place for all. It would be hypocritical not to give a chance to those willing to try and change.”

Ember frowned, thoughtful. And then she sat back in her chair, sighing. “Yeah, I guess that makes sense... Sorry to bring up politics in what's supposed to be a friendly visit.”

Celestia smiled. “You are a ruler, and you are concerned for your subjects. Your concerns are valid,” she said. “I hope we've assuaged them.”

Ember nodded. “I still have doubts, but what you've said makes sense,” she said. “I'll have to trust it for now.”

The three alicorns smiled happily.

Spike was glad the meeting was going well. He liked Ember, and was glad to see that she was still making friends. He went to the kitchens, to get some more snacks... and paused, hearing something outside. He went to look, heading for a window... and then immediately ran back to the map room where the Princesses and Dragon Lord were chatting.

“TWILIGHT! WE GOT A PROBLEM!” he shouted. The four royals turned, but before they cold react, a massive, white-scaled fist punched through the side of the castle, grabbing Spike and yanking him out.

“MINE!” shrieked a voice.

“...That sounded like Rarity,” Twilight said. Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Ember ran for the hole in the side of the castle, spotting Spike being carted off by a graceful white dragoness with purple spines, one of them curling elegantly on her head like a forelock.

“Looks like Rarity went for a second transformation,” Twilight said, worried.

“That's definitely Greedgrowth Insanity,” Ember said, growling. “We need to stop her.”

Rainbow Dash zipped up to the castle, Thunderlane, Flitter, and Cloudchaser with her. “We can't stop her, Princess Twilight!” Thunderlane said. “She's been grabbing ponies left and right!”

“She's been heading to the cave we drove that dragon out of a couple years ago,” Rainbow Dash said, pointing in the direction Rarity was flying. “We can't get close without her attacking us. Should I go get the Wonderbolts?”

Celestia shook her head. “No need for them to put themselves at risk,” she said. “We'll try talking her down first.”

“Indeed!” Luna said. “And with three alicorns here, as well as noble Ember, we should be more than enough to subdue her should she go out of control! HUZZAH!” With that battle cry, she flew off, heading for Rarity. Ember flew after her. Celestia and Twilight traded worried looks, and followed the two of them.

They arrived shortly after at the cave Rarity mentioned. She slithered inside.

“Ember. Will we be able to talk her down?” Twilight asked. “When Spike went into Greedgrowth, he was able to come out of it thanks to Rarity...”

“I still have a hard time believing that happened...” Ember muttered. “But considering she already HAS Spike... What about a relative?”

Twilight shook her head. “She's not on the best terms with her parents, and I refuse to put her sister in danger while Rarity's still this demented,” she said.

“I concur,” Celestia said. “Any other suggestions?”

Ember took a deep breath. “Just one – age me up,” she said.

The three alicorns stared at her, confused. Ember nodded. “Age me up. Temporarily turn me into an adult dragoness. The only way I know of to cure someone of Greedgrowth Insanity is the beat the crap out of them until they come to their senses.”

Celestia, Luna, and Twilight traded worried looks. “I don't want Rarity hurt...” Twilight said softly.

“We may not have a choice, Twilight Sparkle,” Luna said, Celestia nodding in agreement.

Twilight sighed, knowing they were right, “Okay, just... go easy on her.”

The three alicorns turned their magic on Ember. She flinched, and then ROARED as she felt strength and power filling her. Her horns grew longer as her body lengthened, her wingspan growing even more impressive as her spines became larger.

“Whoah...” Ember said, chuckling. “What a rush...” She looked at her much larger body and flexed, the muscles in her arms bulging. “Niiice...”

Rarity came out of the cave, cooing. “Now you darlings be good to one another, and mama will be back shortly with food,” she said, smiling happily at her captives. She turned, and noticed Ember immediately.

“Oh my... Dragon Lord Ember?” she said.

“That's right,” Ember said. “I need you to stand down, pony, and release your captives.”

Rarity twitched, growling. “You... you want to take my hoard! Take my TREASURES! I won't let you take them! I WON'T! In fact...” She looked Ember ever, a grin coming to her face. “I'll add YOU to my hoard! The Lord of All Dragons will be the CROWN JEWEL in my collection! RRRAGGH!” She lunged, tackling Ember and knocking her over, the alicorns quickly getting out of the way as the two dragons fought.

Roaring, Rarity blasted a gout of flame into Ember's face. Ember winced, the flames sizzling against her scales, and flipped Rarity off of her. Before the alabaster dragoness could recover, Ember slammed her tail down against Rarity's head.

The unicorn-turned-dragoness grunted in pain, rolling to her feet and snarling, slashing at Ember with her claws. But as fiercely as Rarity fought, the difference in skill between the two was greater.

Rarity was operating on pure savagery, slashing and breathing fireballs (stray shots quickly being put out by the princesses so as not to damage the nearby forest any more than it already was). But Ember had been a dragon all her life. She knew how to manage the roughhousing that was normal for youngsters of her kind. And she knew how to win.

When Rarity lunged again, Ember sidestepped, brushing a tree across Rarity's face and blinding her. When she staggered forward, Ember breathed a massive gout of flame at her back, right in between her wings, hitting her in a sensitive area.

Rarity yelped, staggering and falling forward. Ember was on top of her quickly, grabbing Rarity by the head and slamming her face into the ground over and over.

“MINE!” Rarity roared.

“They aren't treasures, they're living beings!” Ember roared back.

“MIIIINE! My pretties!” Rarity bellowed.

“YOU WILL LET THEM GO, PONY! I am Ember, Lord of All Dragons, including you!” Ember roared, slamming Rarity's face into the dirt with each of her next words. “AND YOU! WILL! OBEY!”

The last hit was enough. Rarity, dazed and groaning, her snout bleeding, shrunk back down. “Whut... oh... oh dear...” she said as she recovered her senses. “I've made a terrible mistake.”

The alicorns landed near her. “Are you all right, Rarity?” Twilight asked, hugging her.

“I am, darling,” Rarity said, hugging back gratefully. “But I fear I've made several critical errors...”

“Where are thy kidnapping victims, Lady Rarity?” Luna asked.

“In the far end of the cave,” Rarity said. “I'll take you to them.” She flew up, and kissed Ember on the snout. The larger dragoness blushed. “Thank you, Ember, for helping me.”

“S-Sure, no problem,” Ember said, blushing.

The group went inside. The princesses were expecting the worst...

...only to find everyone Rarity had kidnapped relaxing inside a makeshift hot tub, steaming water filling a large, dug out hole. Fancy Pants was chatting with Big Macintosh and Applejack, while Filthy Rich was talking animatedly with Zecora in her native language. The zebra was clearly pleased to hear her native tongue. Trixie was on one end of the tub, showing off for a changeling. Spike, who had gotten out of the tub, looked up, took one look at Rarity and the aged up Ember, and fainted with a blush on his face, muttering “So pretty...” And as for Blueblood.

“Ah! Auntie Celestia!” Blueblood said merrily. He was laying on the side of the tub, Bulk Biceps giving him a massage. “Come and join us! The water is EXCELLENT! And this young stallion is fantastic with his hooves!”

“Yeah!” Bulk Biceps said, beaming happily at the praise.

“You... You're all safe?” Celestia said, relieved but very confused.

Rarity twiddled her talons nervously. “I've come out here a few times on my own after that dragon moved out, collecting bits of his hoard that he left behind. I found a natural hot spring deep within the cave. In my... ah... collecting spree, I wanted to make my 'collection' as comfortable as possible.”

Filthy smiled. “While we could have done without the kidnapping, none of us are hurt,” he said, gesturing to Zecora. “I just brokered a deal with this fine young mare to promote her potions in my store.”

“And I was just educating the two Apple siblings here on the finer points of business, on how they can expand the Sweet Apple Acres brand,” Fancy Pants aid.

Applejack grinned. “This Fancy feller's got his head on straight,” she said. “I see why y'like him so much!”

“Eeyup,” Big Macintosh added helpfully.

“Trixie was a little startled at first, but Trixie thinks she made a new friend out of it,” she said, happily hugging the changeling, who beamed at he praise.

“I'm gonna be her assistant in her shows!” she said.

“So... none of you are angry? None of you are pressing charges?”

“Certainly not,” Blueblood said. “I want to DEVELOP this cave! Turn it into a full spa! Maybe get those two lovely twins in town to run it. Do you know how much of a tourist attraction a natural hot spring spa is? Especially if it used to be a dragon cave? Hire some changelings to pretend to be dragons themselves, and you've got a real business opportunity here!”

Twilight looked thoughtful. “It would help tourism... Especially since they'd have to go through Ponyville to get there...”

Ember looked amused. “So none of you are mad at her?”

“Nah,” Applejack said. “It all turned out all right, didn't it?”

“I suppose so...” Ember said, grinning. “I gotta know, though. What was your criteria for capturing everyone?”

Rarity blushed. “Well... Um... I went for... ponies and persons that I was attracted to physically...”

That got a blush out of the still conscious patrons of the impromptu spa.

“R-Really?” Ember said, blushing, suddenly looking shy. “Me? Attractive? No one's ever called me attractive before...”

“Um... Rarity? It's not that I don't appreciate the thought, but I'm straight as an arrow,” Applejack said.

“Yes, I do apologize everyone,” Rarity said. “I will try to make it up to you somehow.”

Blueblood grinned. “On the contrary. I have to thank you for showing me this delightful discovery!” Bulk Biceps finished his massage, Blueblood standing up. “Oooh, I feel good, thank you good sir...”

Wow, I really Hoofdini'd my way out of this mess, Rarity thought, smiling as Luna decided to join the others in the hot tub.

Twilight sighed in relief. “I guess all's well that ends well...” she said, going to revive Spike.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Later...
In town...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“I suppose you're pleased with yourself,” Celestia said to Discord.

“TOTALLY!” Discord crowed. “I was worried that she'd just indulge in some schmaltzy romance stuff, but this is MUCH better!”

“Ponies could have gotten hurt, Discord,” Celestia said, frowning. “And there's a hole in the side of Twilight's castle.”

Discord scoffed, snapping his fingers. The hole was repaired. “And now there isn't a hole. And nopony got hurt, either.” Grinning wickedly, he held up the waiver Rarity signed. “And even if there was, you can't go after me for it. She signed the waiver.”

Celestia glared at Discord a long moment and sighed. “Forgive me,” she said. “I'm just...”

“You're worried,” Discord said softly. “I understand. I haven't really made much of a good reputation for myself, I know that. But I truly mean no harm in this, Celestia.”

Celestia looked up, seeing the warm smile on Discord's face. She couldn't help it, she smiled back. “Well...” She thought for a moment, and sighed, realizing she had nothing to say. “I suppose I'll be going.”

“Celestia,” Discord said. “You and Luna have freebies as well now.”

Celestia blinked.

Discord grinned. “Call it a peace offering,” he said.

Celestia looked thoughtful, and smiled back. “We'll see,” she said, flying off.

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Rainbow Dash actually picks something!

Author's Note

This was originally going to be non-canon. But I found a way to make it canon. :3

Anyway. Here's the chapter that would have won if Diamond Dog hadn't been chosen. I made it canon by making it a second visit for Rarity, who's grown to like being transformed.

Please remember to vote in the Rainbow Dash poll here for the next transformation chapter.

Customer 7: Rainbow Dash

Discord's New Business
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires
Customer 7: Rainbow Dash

All characters copyrighted to their original owners. If you like my work, please support me on Patreon!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Discord blinked as a bag of bits clinked down on his stand. He looked up, and saw a resolute-looking Rainbow Dash standing before him.

“Interesting,” he said, smirking. “You seem determined.”

“Griffon,” Rainbow Dash said simply. “For four days. I cashed in some vacation time with the Wonderbolts.”

Discord counted the money. Indeed, there was enough for three extra days along with the freebie he promised her. “Have special plans?”

“I promised a friend I'd be there for her when she needed me,” Rainbow Dash said firmly. “And I finally have an idea on how to help her. But if my plan works, it'll be made meaningless if I'm a pony when we find it...”

Discord blinked. “...And suddenly I think I know what you're up to,” he said.

Rainbow Dash frowned. “Something from the bad old days?”

“An old associate,” Discord said. “Someone who's soul has deservedly passed into Tartarus.” He shook his head. “An orderly brute, that one... Excellent scones, though.”

Rainbow Dash hesitated for a moment, frowning. “...Pretty sure I don't want to know,” she said. “Okay, change me.”

“Hm,” Discord said. “Very well...” He lifted his lion paw and snapped his fingers.

The first thing Rainbow Dash felt was her wings growing. The basic magic of a pegasus left her, her wings becoming proportionate to her body mass, as a different, but still somewhat similar magic filled her. Her hooves split open, becoming wicked, gripping falcon talons, the back becoming panther paws. Her fur grew thicker, and her Cutie Mark faded. Her underbelly became white as her muzzle became a beak, one designed for tearing at meat. Her mane stayed the same, mostly, as her tail became a long, whiplike panther's tail with a rainbow tuft at the end.

“Whoah...” Rainbow Dash said.

Discord grinned. “How do you feel?” he asked.

“Stronger,” Rainbow Dash said. “Like my wings are more powerful. Also, griffon magic... it feels weird.”

Discord nodded. “Griffons, I've noticed tend to have a more direct command of the winds as opposed to a pegasi's all purpose weather magic.”

Rainbow Dash grinned. “Great! Thanks, Discord!” she said.

“See how much simpler being specific makes things?” Discord said. But Rainbow Dash had already flown off.

Rarity, casually snacking on a large bag of gems, came up to Discord. “Was that Rainbow Dash?” the dragoness asked.

“Indeed,” Discord said, chuckling. “Off to visit that griffon friend of hers, I believe.”

Rarity chuckled. “Not before she figures out how to Rainboom in her new form, I'll bet,” she said.

Discord smirked. “No bet, lizard lips. I'm a little jealous, though,” he said. “Only time I can do a Rainboom is if I eat curried rice seasoned with pure rainbow.”

Rarity grimaced. “Must you be so crass?”

Discord shook his head. “No,” he said.

“Then why?” Rarity asked.

“Because you're fun to tease,” Discord said, smirking.

Rarity rolled her eyes. “I suppose I walked right into that one,” she said, turning and walking right into the street sign Discord put behind her.

“No, you walked right into THAT one!” Discord said, guffawing.

“I hate you...” Rarity muttered.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Griffonstone...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Rainbow Dash flew at top speed, growling to herself. She had been going in bursts, trying to get to her Rainboom speed. She hadn't realized how far she'd traveled yet, when she finally hit the speed she needed. The air rushing around her, the sound of everything drowned out as the power built up...

...and released.

An explosion of sound, and a bright ring of color burst out of Rainbow Dash as she completed her Sonic Rainboom. She laughed, glad she'd managed to do it, proving herself still the best in her own opinion... and then she fainted, crashing slowly to the ground.

“Omigoshomigoshomigosh!” chanted the little falcon griffon nervously, Gabby zipping up as fast as she could to catch Rainbow Dash as she fell. She caught her roughly, carrying her in her forelegs as she brought her to the ground. “Are you okay? Are you hurt? Do you need beak to beak resuscitation? I can do that but I may scratch your cheeks by accident, I only just got certification and I really hope you're okay because I don't want my well meaning but not quite perfect means of helping you to...”

“I'm... ngh... I'm fine, I just used too much magic...” Rainbow Dash said, looking up. “You're... You're Gabby, right?”

Gabby nodded. “Yeah! How'd you know?”

Rainbow Dash grinned. “Scootaloo told me about you,” she said.

“EEEE!” Gabby squeed, hugging Rainbow Dash as they reached the ground. “How do you know Scootaloo! Oh, she and the girls are the best! They put me on the path to getting my Cutie Mark.” She showed Rainbow Dash the CMC-style shield design on her flanks, which featured a pair of work gloves in them. “I was worried that I wouldn't know what my talent was because I'm good at so much, but my best friend Gilda helped me figure it out! My special talent is helping others! That's how I got my cutie mark!” She paused, and added, “Well, technically, it's not a real cutie mark, I had to go to a fur tattooer in Manehattan to get it, but it's close enough!” She giggled happily.

“Geez,” Rainbow Dash laughed. “Scoots really underplayed how perky you are.”

Gabby giggled. “I can't help it! I just love life in general, and like being friendly to everygriff!” She gave Rainbow Dash a curious look. “How do you know Scootaloo, though?” She gasped. “OMIGOSH! Are you looking for a cutie mark too!?”

Sweet Celestia it's a griffon Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash thought. “Nah,” she said. “I'm Rainbow Dash. I'm normally a pegasus, but I had Discord turn me into a griffon for a few days.”

“Oh...” Gabby said. “...Well, not sure about involving HIM, but so long as it's what you wanted, then neat!” She smiled warmly. “What can I do for you?”

“Can you take me to Gilda?” Rainbow Dash said. “I got a big plan I want her to help with. You can help too, if you want.”

“Oooh!” Gabby said. “What is it?”

Rainbow Dash started to tell her, then hesitated. “I kinda want to wait to tell it to her first,” she said.

“Okay!” Gabby chirped. “She and Greta have their bakery over here!”

“...Who's Greta?” Rainbow Dash asked as the two of them flew off, Rainbow Dash rested enough to fly again.

“She helps run Gilda's bakery!” Gabby said, smiling.

Rainbow Dash grinned, glad that Gilda had more friends. The two griffons flew across the mess of shabby huts, the former pegasus shaking her head. So little progress had been made since she and Pinkie had been there. It seems griffons were still more interested in personal profit rather than taking care of their homes...

“Here we are!” Gabby chirped.

Rainbow Dash stared. “Whoah...” she said. The bakery was the most well-kept building in Griffonstone, a solidly built structure that stood out proudly among the ramshackle, barely maintained huts. The sign on the door said G&G Bakery, and smells reminiscent of Sugarcube Corner were coming out of it.

Gabby smiled, and motioned for Rainbow Dash to come inside, the perky young griffon waving to a griffon with green markings around her eyes and a scarf around her neck. “Hi Greta!”

Rainbow Dash followed Gabby in, looking around at the trays of fresh breads, donuts, and scones. “This place is great!” she said.

Greta smiled. “I'm glad you think so,” she said. “Gilda and I have put a lot of work into this place.”

Rainbow Dash smiled. “So how'd you two meet?” she said.

Greta chuckled. “Well... I met her while she was selling scones one day,” she said. “They were delicious, and I wanted to learn how to make them. We ended up forming a partnership, and worked our way up to making this store.”

“Coolness,” Rainbow Dash said. “My name's Rainbow Dash, by the way.”

Greta blinked. “...Wait, Rainbow Dash? As in Gilda's old friend?” When Rainbow Dash nodded, she frowned. “I thought you were a pegasus.”

“Long story,” Rainbow Dash said.

“I'm guessing it has something to do with that freakshow ex-supervillain you made friends with,” said a teasing voice. Rainbow Dash looked up, spotting Gilda standing in the doorway to a kitchen, forelegs folded and a smirk on her beak. “Good to see you, dweeb. Looks like Discord made you twenty percent less lame.”

“Please,” Rainbow Dash said, strutting. “All he did was improve on perfection.”

“Lemme guess,” Gilda teased, coming out to join the others. “That rainbow infused curry fart a few minutes ago was you?”

“You know me, G,” Rainbow Dash teased right back. “I always gotta make an entrance.”

Gilda and Rainbow Dash both laughed, the two of them hugging. Greta blinked, confused. “I'm somewhat lost... Did you mean... Discord, as in the madman who warped the world a year or so back?”

“Discord's switched sides. He backslid when Tirek showed up, but that creepshow betraying him made Discord realize where his loyalties should lie,” Rainbow Dash said.

“Sorry for not telling you, Greta,” Gilda said. “Dash here told me about it in her last letter. Discord set up a business where he changes ponies for a day into whatever they want.”

“And since griffons are the only thing as awesome as me, guess which I picked,” Rainbow Dash said, smirking.

Gabby giggled, and Greta grinned. “Well, I can't fault your taste, at least,” Greta said.

“Hey,” Gilda said, going over to the donut racks, “now that you are a griffon, I want you to try something. I always wanted to share snacks with you when we were chicks back in flight school, but because you were a pegasus then, I couldn't.” She pulled out a donut with three strips of bacon on it.

“Meat?” Rainbow Dash asked, grinning. “Awesome! What is it?”

Gilda grinned. “Fried strips of pig meat. It's called bacon,” she said. “Goes great on donuts. Especially with maple frosting.”

Rainbow Dash took the donut and took a large bite, taking in a whole strip of bacon. She chewed it thoughtfully. “Hm!” she said happily. “That's pretty good, actually. Texture's a bit weird, but I like that greasy, salty flavor mixed in with the sweetness.” She ate the rest of the donut.

Gilda chuckled. “Honestly, Dash, I'm glad you decided to hang out with us today,” she said, her smile turning sad.

“What's wrong?” Rainbow Dash asked, noticing her expression.

Gilda sighed. “I... I've been trying to get everygriff to try and value friendship more, to trust each other, but... well, you're looking at my only successes so far. And Gabby technically doesn't count, because she's naturally nice.”

Greta shook her head sadly. “It's difficult for age-old habits to break...” she said. “I admit, I was worried about Gilda possibly taking my own gold, but...” She smiled at the larger griffon. “Well, she proved me wrong. Plus, she always makes me laugh. I just like being around her in general.”

Gilda blushed, fidgeting. “A-Anyway, we're thinking about moving to Equestria,” she said. “I don't want to give up, but we're doing nothing here...”

Rainbow Dash smirked. Time to promote her plan. “Maybe the problem is a lack of inspiration,” she said.

Gilda blinked. “What do you mean?”

“The Idol of Boreas,” Rainbow Dash said. “I'm here to help you find it.”

Greta and Gabby gasped. Gilda blinked, a slow smile coming to her face. “...You were always good at tracking,” she said.

Rainbow Dash nodded. “With bird of prey eyes, I bet I could easily spot it from above,” she said.

Greta, still stunned, shook her head. “I don't believe it... The Idol...” she said.

Gabby was flitting back and forth excitedly. “Can... can you really find it? It was lost in the Abysmal Abyss.”

“I actually came pretty close the last time I was here,” Rainbow Dash said. “Punk who helped me get there abandoned me when I ran out of bits, though... “

Gilda growled at that. “Punk... He better not let me find him...” she muttered.

Rainbow Dash smiled confidently. “I have a fairly good idea of where the river at the bottom of the abyss leads to, though. With an aerial survey and some digging, we can bring the Idol home. I bought a few days as a griffon, so finding it won't be demeaned by having a pony there.”

“You are rather smart...” Greta said softly. “You recognize that the pride of griffons would be damaged by pony help, so you present yourself as a griffon rather than a pony.”

“I have moments,” Rainbow Dash said, smirking.

“Once in a blue moon,” Gilda teased.

Rainbow Dash laughed. “C'mon, let's go!” she said. Gilda and Greta closed up the shop, turning everything off and locking the doors, and followed Rainbow Dash. The four of them followed along the top of the Abyss, the winds pushing up on the four of them.

“Everygriff be careful!” Gilda said.

“Relax, G,” Rainbow Dash said, chuckling. “Griffon wings are awesome. They can easily handle this.”

Gilda growled. “Our bigger wings also means we're also at greater risk of a surge knocking us off course, dweeb!” she snapped. “I damn near lost you last time. I don't want any of my friends to get hurt.”

Gabby hugged her in midair. “We won't get hurt, I promise!” she said.

“Yes, fine, thank you, we're crashing LEGGO!!” Gilda snapped as the two started to plummet.

Gabby eeped and backed away, grinning apologetically.

Finally, after almost two hours of traveling, they came to the end of the canyons that made up the Abysmal Abyss, spotting a river leading out of the wind-laden caverns.

“There,” Rainbow Dash said, pointing. “We'll start there.”

The four of them landed, Rainbow Dash staying in the air. They slowly but steadily made their way down the riverbed, searching every nook and cranny for the golden idol. They checked under rocks, in trees, in caves, working down the path of the river for miles.

And found nothing.

“I... I don't understand,” Rainbow Dash said, frustrated. “I was so certain...”

Greta looked doubtful. “Maybe... Maybe it's still in the Abyss?”

Gabby smiled. “I'm pretty good in high winds,” she said. “Maybe I can...”

“No,” Gilda said, sighing. “I'm not letting anygriff risk their lives for a hunk of tin. If it's in the Abyss still, it's GONE. Let's... let's just go back to the bakery.”

Rainbow Dash wanted to protest, but a look at the defeated expressions on the other griffons' faces, she sighed, nodding her agreement.

When they got back, there was a small crowd of annoyed-looking griffons standing at the door.

“Who're they?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“My regulars,” Gilda said to her. She turned to the others, and said, “Sorry, everygriff. Got wrapped up in a side project. I'll stay open an hour longer than usual.”

“Hmmph,” said an older griffon with an owl-like head. “What were you lot doing, anyway?”

“It's not importa...” Greta started to say.

“We were looking for the Idol of Boreas!” Gabby said.

Gilda, as she was unlocking the door, sighed, banging her head on the side of the door. “Thank you, blabbermouth,” she muttered quietly.

The gathered griffons cackled mockingly. “You really think that you can find the Idol?” said the owl-headed griffon.

A hawk-headed griffon sneered. “As if you could,” she said. “You don't deserve to have it anyway. You lack a griffon's proper pride!”

The other customers nodded haughtily.

Gilda's eye twitched. “Pride... PRIDE!?” Gilda roared, startling the customers. Other nearby griffons “Do you know why so many griffons move to Equestria? Because this place SUCKS!” She snarled, gesturing towards the ramshackle, broken hots that dotted the landscape. “LOOK AT THIS PLACE! No one takes care of their homes, everyone's rude to each other, no one will help us unless there's gold involved!”

“N-Now, see here!” said an older griffon customer. “Gold is...”

“It's SHINY ROCKS!” Gilda roared. “We're abandoning each other for SHINY ROCKS!”

Rainbow Dash was watching the crowd. Gilda's words were hitting home for a lot of them, many looking away in shame as they realized she was right. “Go Gilda go...” she said softly.

“We used to BE something!” Gilda said, pacing around. “I looked up our kind's history, and we were AWESOME! A military force on the level of Equestria, tough and strong with GORGEOUS homes... Now we all live in a hovel, hording gold and shiny things like... like...”

Greta realized what word she was looking for, and shook her head fiercely. “Gilda, don't...”

“...like MAGPIES!” Gilda said. Gabby gasped, covering her muzzle as the crowd flinched. Gilda nodded. “Yeah, I went there. We're all acting like magpies.”

“I'm guessing that's a major racial slur,” Rainbow Dash said softly. Gabby and Greta just nodded.

Gilda glared at every griffon there...and slumped over, defeated. “We use to be awesome...” she said, gesturing to the various hovels. “How'd we become this?”

Wordlessly, Gilda, Gabby, Greta, and Rainbow Dash went inside, leaving a stunned crowd of griffons behind them.

“I'm sorry...” Rainbow Dash said, looking frustrated. “I thought... I'd be more useful than I was...”

“It's okay,” Gilda said. “I've been needing to get that out of my system for a while now.” She managed to smile. “Anyway! Try some of the scones. I really think I got the recipe down this time, and...”

The four griffons talked casually for about a couple hours, Gilda and Rainbow Dash sharing flight camp stories with Gabby and Greta. The door's bell rung as the door opened, startling the four griffons inside, the owl-headed griffon and a younger, falcon-headed griffon stepping into the shop..

“Um... hi...” the younger griffon said. “What you said... You're right.”

The owl-headed griffon nodded. “Your impassioned speech just now... It made me take a look at myself and how I had been acting... I saw myself, and realized I have been quite the fool...”

Gilda and Greta traded hopeful looks. “So... what do you want to do?” Greta asked.

“Do you think you can still find the Idol?” the younger griffon asked.

Gilda shook her head and frowned. “It may still be in the Abysmal Abyss. I don't think it's worth the risk, honestly...”

“Oh...” the younger griffon said sadly.

The owl-headed griffon stepped forward. “Then what can we do?” he said. “I love Griffonstone as much as you clearly do. There has to be something...”

Gilda fidgeted for a moment as she thought. “Well... What we really need to do is get the town fixed up. So it doesn't look like we're living in a trash dump...”

The owl-headed griffon nodded. “I know some construction people,” he said. “We can get the library and other public buildings started, at least.”

“I can start an awareness campaign,” the younger griffon said. “I have a printing press at home, print up fliers to encourage everygriff to try and fix up their homes.” He frowned. “I don't know what to put on it, though.”

The two male griffons began discussing what to put on the fliers. Gabby grinned excitedly, going over to offer her own suggestions.

“Wow...” Gilda said, stunned. “I... didn't really expect anything to take...”

Greta nuzzled Gilda, making the larger griffon blush. “You were wonderful, Gilda,” she said.

Rainbow Dash smiled. “You just gotta believe in your own herd,” she said. “I firmly believe that most everypo... that most everyONE is basically good, and just needs a little kick in the tush sometimes to get motivated. It's taken a bit, but you managed to help get things started to make Griffonstone awesome again.”

Greta nodded. “You took charge excellently, my dear Gilda,” she said, smiling warmly.

Gilda fidgeted, uncharacteristically sheepish. “I... no, I'm not a leader. I just yelled at everygriff.”

Rainbow Dash smirked. “Guess what Spitfire does for most of the day,” she said. “And honestly, since joining the Wonderbolts, I've learned how to notice things about the folks I meet. You got great potential, Gilda,” she said. “Especially now since you've dropped the 'bad girl' act.”

Gilda smirked. “Who says I'm acting?”

Rainbow Dash laughed. “Still, I believe in you. Griffonstone needs a leader. And they could do a heckuva lot worse than you,” she said.

Gilda looked at the two male griffons. Earlier today, the two of them wouldn't have even looked at each other. And now, because of what she said, they were talking. Even bonding. And she could almost swear that the younger male was starting to develop a crush on Gabby...

Gilda grinned. “Well... maybe...”

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
That night...
Dreamscape...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

A blue mist drifted into the dream world. In it, an endless changeling hive, filled with colorful changelings gamboling about happily, extended out over the horizon. The mist found the queen, Starlight Glimmer, and her changeling king, Sunburst, governing over them all, Starlight Glimmer rubbing her swollen belly as new changeling grubs grew inside of her. Starlight, upon her transformation to a fully evolved changeling, had retained her colors and cutie mark, her horn gaining a graceful curve to it.

The mist formed, taking on the shape of Princess Luna. “Starlight Glimmer,” she said simply.

Starlight blinked, and looked around, as if coming to her senses. “I'm... dreaming?” she said. She blushed, and said, “Right, of course... S-Sorry...”

Princess Luna grinned. “Fear not,” she said. “To have a massive brood... You are not the first expectant to have such dreams.”

Starlight giggled nervously, sending the dream Sunburst to go check on the other changelings. “Most ponies aren't stuck as a different species for eleven months carrying hybrids.”

Princess Luna sat down next to her. “I have come simply to check on you,” she said. “How are you now?”

Starlight Glimmer smiled, rubbing her belly. She wasn't that far along in real life, but she liked the sensation nevertheless, even if she was just imagining it. “It's... it's an amazing feeling. I don't know how many I'm carrying yet, but... I can feel the love and trust coming from them.” She smiled. “It's oddly empowering.”

Princess Luna nodded sagely. “Motherhood can do that for a mare,” she said.

“There's more, though,” Starlight said. “I can sense the love of others. When two ponies are in love, or when a parent loves their child greatly, it gives off this... this warmth and light, and it's wonderful!”

“Cadenza has said similar things... Perhaps the magic of a changeling and the Love Princess's magic is related?” Princess Luna said thoughtfully.

Starlight smiled warmly. “I know it's just been a few days, and I know it's crazy to think this, but... well, do you think Discord would let me... stay a changeling queen?”

Princess Luna blinked. “...You are experiencing new sensations almost daily,” she said carefully. “I can understand that they are thrilling. But perhaps you should wait. How you feel may change later on.”

Starlight blushed, grinning sheepishly. “Y-You're right, I'm sorry... I just feel so wonderful right now. Sunburst and I...”

Princess Luna chuckled. “Say no more. I am satisfied that you are all right, and will leave you to your dreaming,” she said, standing up and kissing Starlight on the cheek.

“Thanks for checking on me, Princess Luna,” Starlight said.

“You are our subject,” Princess Luna said as she exited the dreamscape. “Your welfare will always be important to us.”

As she left, she said to herself, “Discord's transformations... Ponies do seem to be enjoying them. Rarity even went back a second time... Perhaps I should try one out for myself...”

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next Up: Princess Luna transforms!

Author's Note

So sorry for the delays in posting this! This weekend was busier than usual. I hope you enjoy Rainbow Dash's adventures in Griffonstone.

WHOA. Lotta votes on this one. Griffon OVERWHELMINGLY won with 46% of 596 votes!

Anyway. Next time, Princess Luna tries out transforming! Vote here to pick what she changes into!

Customer 8: Princess Luna

Discord's New Business
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires
Customer 8: Princess Luna

All characters copyrighted to their original owners. If you like what you see, please support me on Patreon!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“Ah, Princess Luna!” Discord said, bowing grandly. “Forgive the lack of fanfare, for I was not expecting a royal visit.”

Luna chuckled, landing next to Discord and adjusting the plain saddlebags she wore. “Cease thy japes, we come to partake of your business,” she said.

Discord blinked, and grinned. “Very well,” he said. “What can I do for you?”

Luna, ignoring the others bowing around her, said, “We have thought about this long and hard, and have decided that we would like to be a zebra.”

Discord blinked. “Huh...” he said. “That's well within your own transformation abilities, I'd say.”

Luna nodded. “Yes. However, the sycophants of Canterlot have learned how to detect when my sister and I are in disguise. You, on the other hoof, are a relative unknown to them,” she said.

Discord grinned. “Looking to go incognito for a while?” he asked.

Luna nodded. “There have been numerous reports of discrimination in businesses amongst certain areas of Canterlot, both tribalism and racism,” she said. “We wish to investigate this, and punish the malefactors responsible for such arrogance.”

Discord nodded. “Interesting...” he said. “Very well then. Zebraluna it is.”

Luna nodded. Before she could do anything else, Discord pressed down on her horn, which descended into her head. She staggered around dizzily, but before the dehorned alicorn could do anything, Discord picked her up and shook her like a violently, her feathers flying off as her wings disappeared.

“I'm gonna throw up...” Luna said, her head bobbing back and forth in Discord's grasp. The draconequus wasn't done, however. He tore a strip of Luna's cutie mark off, and then YANKED as hard as he could, sending Luna spinning so fast until she became a blur, magic swirling around her.

When she landed, dazed and confused, she had become a female zebra. Slightly smaller than Zecora, with a mohawk that trailed down into a hairtail. Her tail was now shorter, more whiplike, and her fur was now black and white striped. Discord took Luna's cutie mark and put it back on, although it now resembled a moon version of the sun design Zecora had.

“Ungh... Did you have to do it that way?” Luna muttered.

“No,” Discord said, amused.

“Of course not,” Luna muttered, gagging a little as she tried not to vomit.

“Will Suntush be handling the moon for your little vacation day?” Discord asked.

Luna nodded. “We have made all proper arrangements,” she said.

“Well, there you go,” Discord said. “Zebraluna be you for the next twenty-four hours. Why not a thestral, though?”

“Recently, my thestrals discovered and dismantled a pony trafficking ring. They have been enjoying an upswing in popularity lately,” Luna said. “It is now 'in' to be nice to thestrals. No, to discover where bigotry is going on, I must be a true minority in Canterlot.”

“Hm,” Discord said. “True, true... Honestly, I don't see many zebras in Equestria at all, really.”

“Which disappoints me that we are not more welcoming,” Luna said. “Zebrica is a country rich in culture and stories...” She shook her head. “Anyway, I must be off.”

“Good luck,” Discord said. “And be careful.”

Luna nodded, moving to pick up her saddlebags, which fell off during her transformation, with magic she didn't have anymore. Chuckling a little, she picked them up normally, sliding her nose underneath the strap and tossing it back. She trotted to the train station, and went back to Canterlot, buying a new ticket. She arrived back at the Canterlot station with little incident, and Luna took a deep breath to calm herself.

“All right,” she said. “Let's do this.”

She started her journey heading for someplace familiar. Donut Joe's was fairly close to the station, and her sister had spoken often of the shop, always with glowing praise. She herself had been there a few times, sometimes with Celestia.

She shouldered her way inside, looking around. The alicorn-turned-zebra smiled at the simple décor, including pictures of various famous ponies. In a place of honor was an autographed picture of Celestia and Luna sharing a plate of donuts, giving Donut Joe a hug.

Luna smiled. She remembered that particular incident. It was the night her magic fully returned, restoring her to full glory. Celestia had wanted to celebrate.

“Hey there!” said Donut Joe from the counter. “I know it smells good, but it smells even better from up close.”

Luna, startled out of her memories, giggled and went over to the counter. “Of course,” she said. “My apologies.”

“Don't get too many zebras in Canterlot,” Donut Joe said. “Would you get offended if I offered you our peanut-butter filled and caramel striped donuts? On sale today.”

Luna smiled. “I would not. I'll take three,” she said, scooping some bits out of her saddlebags.

“Thank ya much,” Donut Joe said, taking the money and levitating a paper plate over with the donuts. “Hope you enjoy.”

Luna took the plate in her mouth, thanking Donut Joe and heading for a table to eat. As she ate, a businesspony unicorn came up to her. “Hi!” he said, smiling pleasantly. “Mind if I sit with you?”

Luna shook her head, eating her donuts contentedly.

The businesspony smiled. “Name's Cash Grab,” he said. He pulled the long coat aside, revealing his cutie mark, a calculator. “I'm an accountant.”

“Kamaria,” Luna said, using the Zebrahili word for 'moon.' “I am simply visiting. I specialize in dream therapy.”

Cash Grab nodded. “Pretty name,” Cash Grab said. “I heard that zebras speak in rhyme, though.”

Luna shook her head. “No. It's a bit complicated,” she said, “but only those of a special class of shaman speak in rhyme. They have to, because of the magic they wield.” She took a bite of her donuts. “I have not met her personally, but I have heard there is one of that class who lives near Ponyville.”

Cash Grab cringed. “Eesh, Ponyville. Nice place, but too weird for me,” he said. “Anyway. Dream therapy. You have a psychology degree, then?”

“Not one from here. Amongst my people, I am accredited as a therapist, but it wouldn't hold water here in Equestria,” she said. Which was technically true, as Luna had learned much about dreamwalking from the zebras back in the old days. “I'm thinking about applying to a college here. I've heard they're quite good,” Luna said.

Cash Grab shook his head, tsking. “You'd have better luck in Manehattan, Miss Kamaria,” he said. “Colleges here tend to look to see if your head has a point on it before considering you.”

Luna frowned. “That... doesn't sound fair,” she said.

“It's not,” Cash Grab said. “It's why I got my accounting degree in Manehattan University. Too much 'revisionist history' in the schools here. Oh, Canterlot's getting better. Restaurant Row no longer serves the same miniscule crap at every shop, for one, but it's slow going. And even with Celestia insisting on reforms, ponies are stubborn on sticking to the old ways.”

Luna frowned again. “...Still, I have heard lots of good things about Canterlot,” she said. “Perhaps there is some good to be found here?”

Cash Grab traded a knowing look with Donut Joe, who just shook his head in sad amusement. “I like your optimism, Kamaria,” Cash Grab said. “I think it's misplaced, but I like it. I wish you luck.”

Luna frowned, but nodded, bidding Cash Grab farewell as he finished his coffee and left. She finished her own donuts and left as well, deciding to check out some of her favorite shops. She had the money, she could probably pick up some presents for Celestia while she was out.

Heading to one of Canterlot's fancier districts, she nodded in polite greeting to the ponies she passed. Some of them nodded back, smiling pleasantly. Others, she noticed, looked oddly offended at her presence. She shifted uncomfortably, reminded of the time after she first returned from the moon.

Spotting her favorite jewelry store, she went inside and began to browse. “Let's see... I know my sister likes amber...”

As she looked through the store, she became aware that one of the clerks was following her, a suspicious look on her face. When she looked over at the clerk, she frowned. “Is there something the matter?”

“Is there?” the clerk asked.

“I'm just browsing,” Luna protested.

“Yes, well, I'm not sure we'd have anything you'd like here,” the clerk, a bluish unicorn, said, scowling.

“And what if I'm shopping for a friend?” Luna said.

“My response stands,” the clerk said.

Luna sighed, and shook her head. She went back to browsing, only for the clerk to keep following her. “I'm not going to steal anything. I have money, enough to buy something here.”

“Again,” the clerk said, “I don't think we have anything you'd like here. Ma'am. I think it best if you'd just leave. You're making the other customers uncomfortable.”

Luna looked around. There were indeed two other customers, but they were looking uneasily at the clerk. “It seems you are the one making the customers uncomfortable, ma'am,” Luna said, scowling.

“If you insist on causing a scene, I'm afraid I'm going to ask you to leave,” the clerk said.

Luna stared, aghast. “I'm just shopping! Can't I just shop?” she demanded.

“Do I have to call the guards?” the clerk said, her eyes narrowing.

“All right!” Luna said, scowling. “I'll leave. But you've lost yourself a rather prominent customer.”

“Of course,” the clerk said, watching Luna carefully as she left.

As she left the store, Luna muttered to herself. “Well, that could have gone better...” She decided to try her favorite restaurant, a Neightallian place in the same district. She passed a mirror in a fashion shop and paused, noticing herself for the first time.

“Huh,” Luna said, looking herself over. She'd never really stopped to look at herself since her transformation. She really did look quite fetching. An elegant striped pattern, a tall mohawk, her cutie mark in the striped, exotic zebra style... She giggled. “If nothing else, I look good as a zebra.”

Humming to herself, she went over to the restaurant. It was open air, and didn't require reservations. She trotted up to it, only to be intercepted by the headwaiter.

She frowned. “Is there something wrong?” she asked, pretending not to know him.

“Madame,” the waiter said in a haughty, faux-Prench accent. In other circumstances, she found his attempts at faking culture amusing. Not today, though. “I believe you are in the wrong place.”

Luna scowled. “I just want to get something to eat,” she said.

“And I have no objections to that,” the waiter said. “Restaurant Row has many fine dining establishments. And lower standards.”

“'Standards?'” Luna asked, incredulous.

“Indeed,” the waiter said. “We are a high class establishment. As such, we have high class guests. One of your... persuasion... would be sorely out of place.”

Luna glared at him. The waiter glared right back. “If you have something to say,” Luna said, “then say it.”

“You will not be served under any circumstances. Go back to the tourist block, where you belong, you striped bimbo,” the waiter said, slamming the door to the restaurant's inner lobby in her face.

Luna stared, shocked. “...Sister said that she detested the higher class areas of Canterlot,” she said softly. “I had no idea that it was this bad, though...” She shook her head. “Palace life has spoiled me.”

She continued to walk through the higher class part of Canterlot, getting rebuffed in many different ways. “Come to think of it...” Luna muttered. “I have never seen a zebra in Canterlot before...”

As she walked, she passed Fancy Pants, Upper Crust, and Jet Set having a conversation at a cafe. Jet Set noticed Luna walking by, and chuckled. “Watch this. I heard this from some youngsters the other day,” he said to Upper Crust and Fancy Pants. “Hey, Miss?”

Luna turned, surprised. “Yes? Were you speaking to me?”

Jet Set smirked. “Stupidretardsayswhat?” he said quickly.

“What?” Luna asked, confused. Upper Crust and Jet Set laughed. It took Luna a moment to get what they said. When she did, she scowled. However...

“What are you two, twelve?” Fancy Pants said, giving the two snobby unicorns a disgusted look. “Come to think of it, it's not funny at twelve, either...” He went over to Luna, and gave her an apologetic look. “I do apologize, Miss. Please believe me when I say that they do not represent the majority of unicorn kind.” Fancy ignored the indignant looks Upper Crust and Jet Set gave him.

Luna smiled. She had met Fancy Pants before, and knew full well of his kindness. But for the sake of her disguise, she pretended this was their first meeting. “Thank you... I've not had many good encounters today,” she said. “My name is Kamaria.”

“Lovely name. Means 'moon,' if I'm not mistaken?” Fancy Pants said. When Luna nodded, he smiled. “Excellent. My name is Fancy Pants, and it's a pleasure to meet you.”

“Likewise,” Luna said, grinning.

“Listen, to make up for it,” Fancy Pants said, levitating out a card with his address on it, “why don't you come to my place tonight? My wife and I would love to have you over as a guest.”

Luna grinned. Fancy Pants was indeed one of the kindest ponies in Canterlot. “I would like that, thank you,” she said.

Fancy Pants nodded. “Shall I escort you somewhere, my dear?”

Luna shook her head. “I wish to explore on my own some more,” she said. “I do appreciate the offer, though.”

Fancy Pants nodded. “Then I hope we shall see you tonight,” he said.

“Indeed,” Luna said, smiling, the two going their separate ways. Fancy Pants cast another glare at Jet Set and Upper Crust, who didn't notice, the two glaring at Luna as she left in the opposite direction.

“Oh no you don't,” Jet Set muttered. “Time to go to work...”

Upper Crust nodded. “Sorry, Fancy, but it's time to protect you from yourself again...”

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
That evening...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Luna sighed. She'd found SOME shops that would serve her in the high class area of Canterlot, but she had mostly been rebuffed most of the day. “Well, this experiment has yielded results, at least...” she muttered. “I will discuss them with sister on the morrow.” She took out the card Fancy gave her, and hmmed thoughtfully. “Well... it would be a good way to end the evening...”

“Miss?” said a voice. Luna turned, seeing a guard in an alleyway. “Would you come here for a second?”

Luna frowned. “What's wrong?” she said as she walked over to him.

“There's been a string of assaults on non-ponies in Canterlot recently,” the guardsman said, the white unicorn smiling pleasantly. “I just wanted to ask you a few questions, make sure you were all right.”

Luna nodded. “Assaults on non-ponies... That's bad indeed... I thank you for your concern, guardsman.”

The guardsman nodded. “Of course,” he said. “It's our duty to keep Canterlot's streets free of filth.”

Luna frowned. Something about the way he said that... She paused.

The guard frowned. “Ma'am? Is something wrong?” he asked.

“I... Actually, I'm fine... I think I will be on my way,” Luna said nervously. She was dearly missing her wings and horn now.

The guard smirked a little. “Don't you want to help in preventing another assault?”

Luna smiled uneasily. “I am but one zebra. How can I help?”

“Oh that's easy,” the guardsman said. “You can serve as a message to other non-ponies to stay out of Canterlot and stop polluting the greatest city in the world with your presence.”

Stars blossomed behind Luna's eyes as she was struck from behind, falling to her knees. Two more guards, one of them carrying the club that struck her, picked her up and dragged her into the alley. Hooves stomped down on her, pounding her ruthlessly. She felt her ribs crack beneath the pummeling, blood gushing from her mouth. A hoof struck her face, her eye swelling shut.

“Careful now,” said a voice she recognized. “Not too much. Anything more severe and the other guards will actually investigate. She still has to walk out of here, you know.”

The guards stopped beating her, and held her up. Luna groggily looked over, and saw Jet Set and Upper Crust saunter into the alleyway, smirking.

“It's nothing personal,” Upper Crust said. “Well, not entirely. But you see... Fancy Pants doesn't know what's best for him. Associating with inferior tribes and races...” She tsked, shaking her head sadly.

“That's where we come in,” Jet Set said. “I've gathered a few like-minded, intelligent individuals, and together we make sure that the Elite of Canterlot stay Elite, without doing anything to bring themselves down. We are the Canterlot Janitorial Service.”

Luna, despite the pain she was in, gave the two snobs an incredulous look. Upper Crust giggled. “Surprised that nobility would name their group something so menial? Really, it's the only thing that fits.”

“Fancy will think that you simply changed your mind,” Jet Set said. “As for you... Heh. Well, you won't even remember this day. A simple memory charm, and you won't even remember our faces. We'll dump you off at the hospital, with a suggestion planted in you not to ever come back to Canterlot. Just as we have with the eighteen before you.” His horn began to glow.

Luna glowered at him. “You have... made two major mistakes...” she said, coughing up blood.

Jet Set chuckled, the glow to his horn fading. “Oh really, little stripes? What were those mistakes, hm?”

Luna sneered. “One was telling me your scheme...” she said, wincing at the pain in her chest. “The other... was MONOLOGUING instead of casting the charm.” Luna may not have been in her body, but she still had all the skills she had gained throughout her long, immortal life. She wrenched her foreleg free of the guard holding it, and punched the other guard holding her as hard as she could, knocking him away. She turned and ran, dashing out of the alleyway.

“STOP HER, YOU FOOLS!” Jet Set bellowed.

The guards chased after Luna, the desperate, wheezing zebra silently glad that they chose not to break her legs. She had to find some measure of safety. Ducking behind a trash dumpster after managing to get ahead of them, she huddled down, shivering fearfully.

Oh, how they would pay once she had her normal magic back. Thanks to Discord's spell, she had the basic knowledge of zebra spiritual magic, but she wasn't in any position to use it to defend herself...

The guards, along with Jet Set and Upper Crust, rushed by her. She sighed in relief and peeked out, looking for a better place to hide.

“Good heavens, Miss!” said a voice, making Luna jump in surprise. Luna turned, and saw Fancy Pants and his wife, Fleur Dis Lee, in a nearby carriage. Both of them looked concerned. “Whatever happened to you?”

Luna started to speak, when she heard the guards coming around the corner again. “Please...” Luna said. “Lord Fancy Pants. You have to claim right of Sanctuary over me. Those guards... your friends from earlier... They assaulted me, breaking my ribs... And the male planned to use a memory charm on me, make me forget the day.”

Fancy Pants blinked. “Jet Set? Crusty? I knew they didn't like non-ponies in Canterlot, but still...”

The guards, Jet Set, and Upper Crust came up to the carriage, Luna shivering and pressing herself up against it.

“I say,” Fancy Pants said, “What's going on?”

“Fancy Pants, let us handle this,” Upper Crust said. “It's for your own good!”

Jet Set nodded. “She's a zebra. She can't be trusted. Just let us take her, and...”

“In what way does race determine one's trustworthiness, hm?” Fancy said, his eyes narrowing.

“Sir, please move on,” one of the guards said. “This is a royal guard matter. This woman is a criminal, and needs to be taken in.”

Fancy scowled. “...I don't believe you,” he said. “Fleur, help Kamaria into the carriage.” The tall, elegant unicorn nodded, gently levitating her into the carriage with them.

“Sir, you can't...” another guard started.

“I claim right of Sanctuary,” Fancy said. “I do not believe her guilty of anything, so I invoke my right as a noble to keep her safe.”

The guards flinched. “WHAT!?” Jet Set shouted.

“Sir, it's an actual thing,” one of the guards said. “We learned about it in the academy. It hasn't been invoked in years, though...”

“Driver, go!” Fancy said, the nervous pony driving the carriage more than happy to move on.

Upper Crust scowled. “I don't understand. Why didn't you go after them?” she said after the carriage had left.

“Once Sanctuary is invoked,” one of the guards explained, “we can't legally touch her. The only ones who can break a Sanctuary are the Princesses.”

Jet Set sneered. “Then we'll just have to get Princess Celestia involved, now shall we? I know for a fact that she's not taking any audiences today, save for an emergency.” He smirked at the guards. “I think a zebra assaulting a noble would be an emergency, don't you?”

Before either the guards or Upper Crust could react, Jet Set took the club one of the guards was carrying and struck himself in the face three times, wincing as the third blow drew blood. He grinned savagely. “Now... to the palace.”

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Meanwhile...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Fleur was wiping Luna's battered face with a cloth. “Poor dear... what did those brutes do to you?” she said.

“I still can't believe Jet Set would be in on such business... I knew he was a fool, I didn't know he was villainous...” Fancy Pants said, shaking his head.

“I am sorry about your friend,” Luna said. “But he is responsible for several assaults on non-ponies, all for the purpose of keeping Canterlot 'pure.'” She explained what she heard, the anger on Fancy's face growing, as Fleur grew more and more horrified.

“How could anypony do such things?” Fleur said softly.

Fancy was fuming, his mustache bristling in anger. “Once again it is proven that applying the term 'nobility' to those born of high blood is a GRAND mislabeling...”

Luna smiled. “You need just keep me safe for the next few hours,” she said. “Then this will be resolved.”

“How do you mean?” Fleur asked.

“I am Princess Luna,” Luna said. “I asked Discord to transform me into a zebra for twenty-four hours, so I could investigate the growing reports of bigotry in Canterlot. The spell will end automatically after the full twenty-four hours.”

Fleur and Fancy gave her a disbelieving look. Luna smirked. “At the last soiree of yours I attended, Tia and I, in private, jokingly asked you which of us had the more attractive posterior.”

Fancy blushed brightly, as Fleur gave her husband an amused look. “Yes... well...” Fancy stammered.

Luna grinned. “Never seen someone teleport that fast before...” she said.

Fancy gave her an exasperated look. “Well, you can understand my desire to flee from that circumstance...” he muttered. “All right, I believe you. But why have that troublemaker change you?”

“My own magical signature would be recognized by the sycophants of this city,” Luna said. “They are learning the disguises Tia and I take. I wished to see Canterlot's face without the mask of civility it wears for us. I had no idea it was this bad, though...”

Fleur shifted uncomfortably. “...While Fancy Pants and I do support your and your sister's policies, there has been a growing sense of unrest.”

Luna frowned. “Oh?”

Fancy sighed. “The changelings,” he said simply. “There is a lot of bitterness all across Canterlot since the invasion. And while I understand the reason why you asked us all to accept them, and have since made friends with changelings... The memory of the wedding invasion still lingers...”

Luna winced. “Perhaps it is for the best on multiple levels that this day has occurred, then,” she said. “I confess to have come to the realization that palace life may have spoiled my sister and I, detaching us from the ponies around us.”

“While it is not the most pleasant experience,” Fancy said, smiling, “all we can do with life is learn from it. Use what we learn throughout the days to educate ourselves and become better ponies.”

Luna smiled. “You are truly wise, Fancy Pants,” she said.

The driver stopped. “Sir, we're home,” he said.

Fancy nodded. “Thank you,” he said. To Luna, he asked, “Will you be all right?”

“Ribs still hurt,” Luna said. “But we are fine to get out, I think. Be prepared for a visit from my sister.”

Fleur blinked. “Princess Celestia? Why?”

Fancy frowned. “Because the only thing that can break a Sanctuary is the word of a princess...” he said. “It makes sense that Jet would go to her... All right. Let's get inside and get you patched up.”

The trio went inside, giving the carriage driver the rest of the night off. Luna was given healing magic and basic first aid, her ribs bandaged. Almost an hour passed, a tense, silent time, before the front door bell rung.

Fancy and Fleur traded uneasy looks, Fancy's horn flaring as he opened the door to let in his visitors.

Celestia, flanked on either side by Jet Set, Upper Crust, and the three guards from earlier, all entered the main hall. Jet Set was faking being dizzy, his head bandaged. He leaned on Upper Crust slightly, the guards remaining stoic. A sad, slightly disappointed smile was on Celestia's face.

“Lord Fancy Pants,” Celestia said.

Fleur and Fancy bowed. “Welcome to our abode, your highness,” Fancy said. Luna did not bow, she simply watched carefully.

Celestia glanced briefly at Luna, without recognizing her. To Fancy, she said, “Lord Jet Set was assaulted earlier. Upper Crust says it was the zebra you now are giving Sanctuary to, and these guards have the same story.”

Fancy nodded. “So they say,” he said.

Celestia sighed. “Lord Fancy Pants, I must ask you to surrender the zebra for trial. And proper treatment of her injuries, it looks like.”

“I will not,” Fancy said firmly.

Celestia frowned. “Lord Fancy Pants... There is ample evidence against this zebra...”

“This isn't a zebra. It's your sister,” Fancy said, smirking a little.

Jet Set, Upper Crust, and the guards gave Fancy an incredulous look. Celestia blinked, confused. “I... I'm sorry?”

“Tia,” Luna said. “Do you remember the story 'Goodnight Moon?' How much I loved it?”

Celestia's eyes widened. “Y-Yes... Because it was the first thing mother gave you that wasn't a hoof-me-down from me...”

Luna smiled wistfully. “It was the first thing that was truly mine... I still remember it to this day, word for word... and it was one of my only comforts during my exile, even in the madness of the Nightmare...”

Jet Set suddenly realized what was happening, his eyes widening in fright. He motioned, and he, Upper Crust, and the three guards began slowly backing away.

Tears were in Celestia's eyes. “Oh Luna, I...” And then she paused, taking in Luna's appearance for the first time. The bandaged ribs. The blood on her striped coat. The swollen shut eye.

Celestia turned, her eyes glowing black. Her mane and tail lost all color, becoming swirling black voids that twisted inward. Light seemed to be absorbed into her as she glared at Jet Set and his minions with star-crushing rage.

“You. Hurt. My. Sister,” she said softly. So intense was the force of her anger that she had become a gravity well, Jet Set, Upper Crust, and the guards being drawn towards her.

Fancy, Fleur, and Luna were being drawn towards her as well. “Sister...” Luna said, alarmed.

“You. Hurt. My. Sister,” Celestia said again, her expression murderous. As much as they tried to run, the guards and the two corrupt nobles couldn't escape the gravity well generated by the force of Celestia's all-consuming anger.

“Tia, please, calm down...” Luna said.

“It was them!” one of the guards said suddenly, pointing to Jet and Upper. “The whole thing was their idea! I was just in it for the money!”

“Please...” Jet begged. “We didn't know it was your sister!!”

“DO YOU HONESTLY THINK SAYING THAT HELPS YOUR CASE!?” Celestia bellowed, everypony else covering their ears as the sound shattered every window in the estate.

Fortunately, the sound of breaking glass also brought Celestia back to her senses. Her mane and tail became normal again, her eyes losing the ebon glow as she looked around sheepishly. “Er... I will personally pay for all the damages...” she said, grinning weakly. The conspirators tried to flee, but she held them in place with her magic.

Fancy scoffed. “I'd been thinking about remodeling anyway,” he said.

Celestia smiled. “Still...” She sighed, and turned to Luna. “Will you be all right?”

“From what I understand,” Luna said, coughing a little, “any injuries I received will reverse themselves upon restoration of my true form.”

“That's good,” Celestia said, nuzzling her. “What of them?”

Luna scowled. “They have assaulted eighteen non-ponies, blanking their memories and planting a hypnotic suggestion not to come back to Canterlot. We must find out who they are and undo the memory charm so that these miscreants can be properly prosecuted.”

Celestia sneered at the conspirators, who were already yelling at each other, each blaming the other for their failure. “I'm sure one of them can be convinced to talk,” she said.

Luna sighed. “There is also much to talk about related to Canterlot itself,” she said. “While I was traveling, before the incident, I was denied service at several high end stores that normally welcomed me.”

Celestia frowned. “We'll look into it,” she said. “For now, though, let us get LOYAL guards in here to arrest this scum.” Her horn flared, casting a flare out through one of the windows which rocketed into the sky.

Luna smiled at Fancy and Fleur. “Thank you for protecting me,” she said gratefully.

Fleur and Fancy bowed. “Our pleasure, your highnesses,” Fancy said. “Although I do confess a bit of curiosity...”

“Hm?” Luna asked.

“You said Discord changed you?” Fancy asked.

Luna nodded. “He has opened an entertainment business of sorts,” she said. “For a full twenty-four hours, you can be almost anything you want.”

Fancy looked thoughtful. “Most interesting... That certainly explains why Lady Rarity was a dragon... But really, that is most fascinating...”

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Fancy Pants transforms!

Author's Note

Another serious one this time. But what's this? We have someone new on the transformation block!

Ladies and gentlemen, Fancy Pants joins in! Vote for what he turns into here!

Anyway, not as many votes this time, but they were spread out a lot more. Zebra won with 23% of 368 votes. Thank you always for your continued participation!

Customer 9: Fancy Pants and Fleur Dis Lee

Discord's New Business
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires
Customer 9: Fancy Pants and Fleur Dis Lee

All characters are copyrighted to their original owners. If you like my work, please support me on Patreon!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Royal Palace...
Canterlot...
A day after the incident...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Celestia was busily going through forms, signing them and organizing them into piles. She was grumbling to herself the entire time. A sound came from nearby, and she looked up, smiling when she saw Luna coming into her chambers.

“Feeling better?” Celestia asked.

“Indeed,” Luna said, the dark blue alicorn stretching her wings. “The physical damage was undone upon my transformation, so I am fully healed.”

Celestia smiled. “Good. I'm glad you're okay,” she said.

Luna nodded. “The question is, are you?” she said.

Celestia blinked. “You are well. Why wouldn't I be?”

Luna frowned. “You turned into the Voidmare, Tia,” she said. “You haven't done that in centuries.”

Celestia flinched, closing her eyes and sighing. She turned to the pile of paperwork in front of her. “Multiple counts of assault for Jet Set, Upper Crust, and those guards, as well as charges of forced brainwashing, illegal use of memory charms, as well as charges of tribalism, racism, and classism. Discrimination charges to file against those businesses who turned you away,” she said. “We STILL don't know who all of the victims of Jet Set and Upper Crust's group were. Canterlot General Hospital is going over their records to see who might fit the criteria. None of those bastards knew the names of their victims, and can't even remember all of the species... It's like they have forgotten the Windigos completely, sister...”

“Time has a way of turning history into quaint legends, Tia... Like it did with me...” Luna said softly, sitting down next to her sister.

Celestia shook her head. “That was different, a deliberate act on my part,” she said. “I didn't want anypony to associate your name with the Nightmare's. I wanted to make it easy for you to come back. It didn't entirely work...”

Luna sighed, nuzzling her sister. “You tried. That is what is important,” she said. “It's all we can do in the end...”

Celestia just grunted in frustration..

“How are the other guards taking this revelation?” Luna asked.

“There is fury,” Celestia said. “Calls for harsh punishments for the 'oathbreakers,' and calls for charges of treason.”

Luna frowned. “While what they did is beyond heinous... to be fair, they didn't know it was me,” she said. “Treason would be an unjust charge.”

“I'm sorely tempted...” Celestia muttered. “But you are right. Still, this has shaken up the Guard badly. Captain Barricade reports that nearly all of them have come to her to retake their oath of loyalty.”

“We'll have to keep an eye on that,” Luna said. “The last thing we need is unrest in the Guard...”

Celestia nodded. “Indeed,” she said. “To make matters even more aggravating, Shining Armor is coming from the Crystal Empire.”

“Why?” Luna asked.

“He feels betrayed,” Celestia said softly. “One of the guards that were a part of Jet Set and Upper Crust's little group was a close friend of his in basic training.”

“These trials are going to be a headache...” Luna muttered.

“And investigations must be conducted into the nobility as well, to see if they had any connections to Jet Set and Upper Crust's little group... Not Fancy Pants, of course, but the rest...” Celestia shook her head. “I wish I knew why my city was like this...” she said. “After all my efforts...”

“We are spoiled, dear sister,” Luna said. “We sneak out from time to time, but always we stick to comfortable places, familiar ones. We are detached from this city and her people because of our own personal biases, too used to the comforts of the palace and the comforts of familiar friends. Because of that, we have allowed too much pride to fester in Canterlot. Pride, when left unattended, can become arrogance.”

Celestia thought for a moment, and nodded. “You are right, of course,” she said. “We'll have to try harder to connect with our little ponies. It's just...”

Luna looked up, worried. “Tia?”

Celestia shook her head. “Ponies turning ponies away because of their class or tribe... Entire races being excluded... Is it so wrong of me to want to dream of a better world, Luna? To believe in an Equestria where everypony, everyONE is treated fairly?”

Luna kissed Celestia on the cheek. “No,” she said, smiling sadly. “But that world is one that must be worked towards.”

“A never-ending effort, it seems...” Celestia said, nuzzling Luna.

“Indeed...” Luna said. “I regret that I didn't have the chance to fully explore my zebra form's magic.”

Celestia chuckled. “You were rather busy, Lulu,” she said.

“True...” Luna said. “But I think, after this experience, if I do go try Discord's services again, I think I'll become a thestral.”

Celestia nodded. “I can see that.”

“And go on a date,” Luna added, smirking.

“...That's fine,” Celestia said, frowning.

“With several of my guards,” Luna continued, grinning. “At once.”

“Luna...” Celestia said, aggravated.

“Did you know that thestral matings can go on for...” Luna said, a teasing expression on her face.

“LUNA!!” Celestia said. “If you choose to use your second transformation for such things, that's fine. But I do not need to hear the details of my sister's sex life!”

Luna nodded, smiling at the flustered look on Celestia's face.

There was a long pause. Celestia, curiosity overcoming her, sighed and asked, somewhat sheepishly. “...How long can they last for?”

Luna laughed.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“I must say,” Fancy Pants said, “I'm surprised you're so angry about this.”

Discord snarled, his eyes glowing red. “No one torments Sunbutt and Moonbutt but me,” he muttered. “And even then, when I do it, it's FUNNY! Harmless little pranks! General annoyance! Just BEATING someone for being different... No class, no class at all. It's RUDE.”

“The priorities of a chaotic being...” Fleur said softly.

Fancy Pants gave Discord a curious look. “You claim rights to annoying the Princesses?”

Discord nodded. “Well sure. They're my friends,” he said with utmost sincerity. “You're allowed to pick on your friends.”

Close enough, Fluttershy thought. She sighed, shaking her head and smiling, while Fancy Pants and Fleur traded amused looks. Discord looked back and forth between the ponies, confused.

“...Am I missing something? Did I get a friendship detail wrong? It's so annoyingly complicated at times...” he asked.

“You're learning,” Fluttershy said. “That's what is important.”

Discord grumbled to himself. Fluttershy smiled, and then turned to Fancy Pants. “How's Luna doing?”

“She's better, thankfully,” Fancy said. “Changing back undid all the damage.”

“That's good,” Fluttershy said. “Twilight will be glad to hear that.”

“Indeed,” Discord said. “The rest of the mane characters (typo intentional) have been with her all night since she found out, trying to keep her from flying into a panic attack and tearing a hole in her own castle. It'd be hilarious if the situation wasn't so serious.”

Fluttershy nuzzled Discord, and flew off. “I'd better go tell her,” she said, flying off.

“Why would the others keep her at her castle, though?” Fleur asked.

“Because Twilight, when she panics, makes things worse,” Discord said. “They're trying to calm her down before she literally goes crashing into Canterlot.” He snickered. “I should show you a recording of the time she tried to babysit her super-powerful niece while also keeping to a whole day of personal appearances. It's one of the funniest things ever.”

Fancy chuckled. “Indeed. We all need a laugh after this. Which is why, I think, Fleur and I will go with something less dramatic than a species change this time,” he said.

Discord looked interested. “Oh? What did you have in mind?”

“I think perhaps...” Fancy Pants said. “Switch the genders of Fleur and myself. For three days each.” He hoofed over the bits, smiling.

Discord looked thoughtful. “Hm... Might as well add it to the regular lineup. I've gotten enough requests for it.” He manifested a marker and wrote 'genderswap' on the list of offered forms. “Gotten some permanent change requests, but I'm not licensed for that.”

“Surprising that you haven't just done it,” Fleur commented.

Discord scoffed. “You have any idea how much chaos I've caused just from doing this legally? No way I'm giving this game up by breaking the law.”

Fleur giggled.

“Anyway,” Discord said. “Genderbend ho.”

He snapped his fingers, Fancy Pants sneezed, his mustache shooting off as he changed to female in a poof. “My word,” Fancy Pants said, rubbing her nose. Discord picked up the mustache and placed it on Fleur's muzzle. With another poof of magic, Fleur became male.

The husband and wife looked at each other, at their transformed state. Fancy Pants was slimmer, with more pronounced curves, her mane becoming longer and more flowing. Her body had also lost some height, and her muzzle was shorter. Her coat, once fitted perfectly, now hung loosely off of her frame.

Fleur was the same height, although he now sported a pink mustache and was bulkier. His mane shortened, his bangs growing out into a stylish curve. His muzzle was boxier as well, his jaw more square. “Goodness,” Fleur said, looking himself over. He blinked, and laughed at his new voice, deeper voice. “My voice is much deeper now! Haha!”

Fancy giggled, amused at how high her voice was now. “Dear me. I've become a soprano!”

“Well done, Discord,” Fleur said. “We look fantastic.”

“We here at Discord's House of Messing With You And Getting Paid For It pride ourselves on quality customer service. Please see our branch offices on Mobius, the Mushroom Kingdom, Runeterra, Azeroth, Cybertron, Eternia, and Care-A-Lot,” Discord said, smiling.

Fleur and Fancy chuckled, trotting off to enjoy the rest of their day.

“Where to first, my love?” Fancy asked.

“Well, my dear Fancy Pants... although perhaps Fancy Dress would be a better name now,” Fleur quipped, giggling. “Where would you like to go?”

“Fancy Dress...” Fancy said softly, grinning. “That actually sounds like a wonderful idea!” She nodded. “To Carousel Boutique!”

The two trotted off, going to the distinctive home of Ponyville's resident fashion designer. “Miss Rarity? Are you home?” Fancy said, knocking on the door.

The door opened, revealing a large, white dragoness. “Welcome to Carousel Boutique, where everything is... Fancy Pants?”

“Well, certainly I do enjoy a fancy pair of corduroys, but I'm in the mood for women's wear today,” Fancy said, grinning.

Rarity blinked, and chuckled, motioning the two of them inside. “Making use of Discord's services, I see?”

Fleur nodded. “It's certainly different,” he said, twitching his nose. His mustache felt weird. “I'm still not completely used to my new center of gravity. Plus, this thing on my face itches.”

“Oh, tish tosh,” Fancy said. “You didn't mind it when it was attached to my face.”

“Well yes, but then it tickled, and only when applied to certain areas of my body,” Fleur said, smirking.

“Now now,” Rarity said, blushing a little. “As amusing as this is, let's show a little bit of propriety, shall we?”

“Forgive us,” Fancy said. “Merely a bit of fun.”

Rarity chuckled. “Quite all right,” she said. “Now. What can I do for you?”

Fancy smiled. “Well, since I seem to be Fancy Dress now rather than Fancy Pants for the next few days,” she said, tittering at her joke, “I believe that a new outfit is in order?”

Rarity rolled her eyes. The joke wasn't that funny. “Well, come this way,” she said, “and stand on the platform. As I don't have magic right now, I'm going to be getting a little handsy with you to get your measurements.” She flexed her claws, and pulled out a measuring tape.

“Whether dragon or pony, you are a lady, Ms. Rarity. I trust you not to be inappropriate,” Fancy said.

“Even after I tried to add you to my harem hoard?” she asked quietly.

“I consider it a compliment that a dragon would consider me handsome enough to be worthy of being called a treasure,” Fancy said.

“Honestly, I'm a little offended you didn't take me as well,” Fleur teased.

Rarity blushed, coughing. “Yes, well...” she said. “Let's begin, shall we?”

Fancy nodded, discarding her coat. “Mind if I just leave this here until I change back in three days?” she asked, setting it aside.

“Certainly,” Rarity said as Fancy stepped up onto the platform. “Don't be surprised if I make an adjustment or two to it.” She whipped out the measuring tape and began to take Fancy's measurements, humming to herself and going back and forth from a notebook. Fleur and Fancy watched in fascination as Rarity's quill darted back and forth across the paper, creating a new design out of nothing.

Once it was done. “Oh wow...” Fleur said.

Rarity beamed. The new dress was a simple, flowing number, one lined with gems down one side. It would accent Fancy's curves, while highlighting her best features.

“Exquisite as always,” Fancy said.

Rarity grinned toothily. “Not bad for just off the top of my head,” she said. “I may make a few additions here and there, but this is a good preliminary sketch.”

Fancy smiled. “Shall we pay you now?”

Rarity looked confused. “Why? I haven't given you the product yet,” she said.

“I always admired your integrity in your business, Rarity,” Fancy said. “We'll stop by later to pick it up.”

“I'll send you a telegram. It should be ready by tomorrow, as I recently caught up on my backlog...” Rarity said, looking thoughtful as she studied the design.

“Very well,” Fancy said. “Fleur, darling, shall we be off?”

“See you later, Rarity!” Fleur said as the couple trotted out of the shop. “So now what, Fancy?”

“A good question,” Fancy said as they trotted along. “Our transformation was a rather simple one. And I still feel pretty much like myself.”

Fleur grinned, blushing a little. “I can think of one thing I'd like to try, but we'd have to wait until we get back home.”

Fancy giggled. “Well, if nothing else, we can simply enjoy the Ponyville sights and sounds,” she said.

“And maybe make fun of gender stereotypes as well?” Fleur suggested.

Fancy smirked. “Naughty boy,” she said.

Chatting casually, the two of them made their way to SugarCube Corner. As they did, though, they were spotted by a trio of Earth pony mares, each the color of the flowers they had in the carts they brought with them.

The cream colored mare with the rose colored hair stepped forward. “I'm sorry, but are you new in town?” she asked.

“Indeed,” Fancy said. “I'm Fancy Dress, and this is my husband...” She hesitated, and said, “Frank.”

Fleur blinked. Frank? Really?

“Not many ponies with donkey names,” the cream-colored mare said. “My name is Roseluck. My friends are Daisy, and Lily. We're with the Ponyville Alertness Committee!”

“Oh?” Fleur said. “I was not aware that Ponyville had such a thing.”

“We're not official,” Lily said, digging through her flower cart. “But we're definitely needed.”

“Do you know how many dangerous things there are in Ponville?” Daisy said, shivering. “We're right next to the Everfree Forest! Monsters! Scary voodoo zebras! Rabbit stampedes!”

“Rabbit stampedes? Really?” Fancy said in an amused tone.

Roseluck nodded. “Do you have any idea what a swarm of rampaging bunnies can do to your garden?! Oh, the horror...” she said, staggering and almost fainting.

“On top of that, we have Crusader antics to worry about,” Lily said.

“Don't believe them when they say they've changed!” Daisy said. “They're just spreading their madness to all the other foals in town.”

“How scary,” Fleur said in an almost bored tone.

“It is!” Lily said, pulling out a pair of pamphlets, giving them to the two unicorns. “And on top of everything else, we've got the Lord of Chaos himself living here!”

“Oh my,” Fancy said, looking through the pamphlet, a long list of 'dangerous' things to watch out for. “Thank you, dears. We'll be on the lookout from now on.”

Roseluck, Daisy, and Lily beamed happily. “We're proud to be of service!” Daisy said, giving them both one of each of their namesake flowers. “Here. A snack, on the house.”

“Please come to our flower stands if you need anything from arrangements or catering!” Roseluck said. “Also, we have meetings of the Awareness Committee twice weekly! We can give you updates on the dangers of this town then!”

The three mares trotted off happily, thinking they had just saved another couple from the dangers of Ponyville.

Once they were out of view, Fleur folded her pamphlet into an origami crane, casually eating her flowers.

Fancy giggled, crumpling her pamphlet up and disposing of it in a nearby trash can as she ate her flowers as well. “I see we've met the town paranoids,” she said.

Fleur snorted, setting the crane down at a doorstep. A blankflanked child who lived there would find it later, unfold it to learn how to make it, and discover his talent for origami artwork shortly after.

Fleur, getting a silly idea, said in a comically heroic tone, “Fear not, dear lady! For I will always protect you! After all, protecting mares is a stallion's work!”

Fancy giggled as Fleur puffed his chest out, acting macho. “Yep,” he continued. “Because I'm a macho, rough and tumble stallion! I get in fights! I drink beer! I lift heavy things!” He looked around for something heavy to lift. He saw Big Macintosh unhook his apple-filled cart nearby and head into SugarCube Corner, and went over to try and lift it.

“Macho stallions lift, bro!” he said, attempting to lift the heavy cart... and failing miserably. “HNNGHHH!” He strained, making a general fool of himself.

“No cheating by trying to use magic, dear,” Fancy said, watching with amusement.

Fleur tried several times to lift the heavy cart, from several different angles, but it was just too heavy for the spindly stallion. He lay down next to the cart, panting for breath.

And then a small, pink filly with a porcupine cutie mark, one who'd been watching the whole exchange, came along and lifted the cart easily into the air. With one hoof. She then set it down again, making sure not to spill any apples, calmly walking off.

“...” Fancy said.

“...Well now I just feel inadequate,” Fleur said. Fancy collapsed with laughter. Fleur fumed. “It's not THAT funny.”

Fancy tried to get control of herself. She really did. But after all that effort with no result, a tiny filly comes along and lifts the thing with one hoof...

Fleur huffed, turning away. “A fine thing. I try to impress my wife and then she goes and laughs at me,” she said.

Fancy nuzzled him, finally getting control of her laughter. “I'm sorry, dearheart. But really, what were you thinking? That strapping young lad guiding the cart is obviously a farmer, judging by the muscle and the wear on his hooves. You were a supermodel before I married you.”

Fleur blushed. “I don't know, I just... I wanted to do something impressive while I was transformed...” he said.

Fancy chuckled. “You never have to worry about impressing me with your deeds, Fleur Dis Lee,” she said. “You won my heart with your kindness, your brilliant mind, and your wonderful sense of humor.”

Fleur smiled warmly.

“...That, and you have a nice butt,” Fancy added.

Fleur rolled his eyes. “Stallions are pigs. Even when they're women,” he said.

Fancy giggled. “Come! Let's not worry about such things anymore. This is our day to enjoy, my dear. Let's journey to yon bakery and partake of its wares.”

“Goodness knows I could use some cake after THAT fiasco,” Fleur said, chuckling as the two nobles went inside.

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: You pick who transforms, and what they transform into!

Author's Note

Sorry for the late post. Yesterday was a painful day for me, and I just needed time to myself...

ANYWAY! I hope you enjoyed this silly little chapter. Genderswap won the vote with 52% of 381 votes.

Gonna do something different this time. You pick not only what the transformation will be but who will be transformed as well! It's a total mystery!

Customer 10: Trixie Lulamoon

Discord's New Business
Customer 10: Trixie Lulamoon
by THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE

Trixie supposes that she should acknowledge that in your universe, the trademark to her name and likeness are copyrighted to Hasbro, or some such nonsense. Also, apparently this 'KnightMysterio' clown is even poorer than Trixie, so donate money to him so he can continue writing about Trixie's greatness. Also, this chapter takes place after everyone's temporary transformations had worn off.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\*
That one hamlet where Twilight lives...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\*

Trixie supposes that she should begin the tale of her day of glory with how she became an alicorn for the day.

First, Trixie came into Ponyville with intent on visiting her friend Starlight Glimmer. Her parole officer (a rather strapping young thestral named Spruce Vine) had cleared her to come into town for a visit, making sure the local authorities knew she was coming.

(Trixie is a most humble and law-abiding pony. Also, Spruce is amazingly attractive and Trixie wishes to stay on his good side so she can successfully seduce him.)

Ever stoic, but ever insistent on remaining in the background so as not to interfere with Trixie's personal life, he sat back and let Trixie visit Starlight Glimmer at Twilight's castle. Imagine Trixie's surprise, however, when her dear friend and magic teacher Starlight turned out to be a changeling queen!

“Not actually a queen,” said the colorful creature my friend had become. “Just temporarily. Well, maybe. Depends on how I feel after the grubs are born.”

THAT certainly caught Trixie off-guard. “You are certain you are pregnant? This early?!”

“Yeah,” Starlight said. “I don't know how to explain it, but... I could just tell that new lives were forming within me, the moment I was fertilized. Thorax told me that Chrysalis could always tell when she was expecting the instant after being fertilized too...”

While I like Thorax, I had no real desire to learn about changeling biological processes. (Although Trixie was sorely tempted to ask for details of the romantic encounter. While she has no real personal attraction to Sunburst, he is a bit of a stud.)

Yes, Trixie is switching back and forth between talking normally and her usual third person manner of speech. Trixie is just cool like that, in that she can switch back and forth between humble and bombastic on a whim. So there. Nyah.

Instead, Trixie decided to ask how Starlight became a changeling queen in the first place. Starlight said that Discord had started a business, legally no less, where he would change anypony who paid him into whatever they wanted for a single day, all basic racial knowledge included. (Which explains why Rarity was a dragon a few days ago. Trixie never thought to ask.)

I couldn't pass that up. Really, who could? And I most definitely knew what I wanted to turn into. There was one problem.

“No,” Spruce Vine told me. “Absolutely not.”

“Oh come on,” I asked him. “What could it hurt?”

“Said the dentist before bringing out the drill,” quipped Spruce. It's nice to see that the guards do have something resembling wit.

“I promise I won't do anything destructive. I've learned my lesson since the Amulet,” I said. “Plus, I bet I can make it worth your while...” I added, giving him my most sultry look.

Spruce glared at me. “Are you attempting to bribe your parole officer?”

“Certainly not,” I scoffed. Really, how underhooved does he think I am? “I'm SEDUCING you. This is a bonafied attempt to get into your pants. Which you don't have on, but you get the metaphor.”

I would have laughed at the startled expression that came over his face, but I was trying to get him to let me do this. Apparently, though, he was more dedicated to his job than I hoped. “I can't, Trixie. I won't let you violate your parole by doing this.”

Curses, I thought. However, Trixie had another idea, and took Spruce to Twilight Sparkle herself. Apparently, her little dragon assistant, Spike, had just ended a week as a unicorn. My curiosity was piqued even more. I HAD to try this service out, and asked Twilight if I could have special permission. Spruce made the argument against it. And my dear frenemy Twilight Sparkle pointed out the loophole I was looking for.

“...Technically, a transformation doesn't violate her restrictions. She's specifically not allowed to use magical artifacts to gain added power, and since Discord doesn't use charms to change ponies, she's legally allowed to go to him,” she said.

Spruce's shocked expression was absolutely hilarious.

I decided to make an entrance when going to visit Discord's stand, and cast the illusion spells to create dazzling fireworks. Trixie psyched herself up, slid in through the fireworks, and posed. “The Great and Powerful Trixie has come to grace your business!”

Discord looked suitably impressed at my entrance, paying me proper respect.

“Tell it right, Lulamoon.”

Er... no, that's not what he said. He said,

“Discord, handsome rogue that he is, said, 'You'll never defeat me, Lulamoon. Tell it right or I'll turn this into a Warhammer story.”

That's bad, isn't it?

“You have no idea.”

Fiiiiine... Sheesh. All the trouble I went through to take over the narration and I can't even... whatever.

Discord gave me an amused but slightly bored look, and said, “Eh, six out of ten.”

I grumbled, but decided not to push it. “Trixie has found a loophole in her parole and has come to indulge in your services, Discord!”

“Should be good for a laugh,” Discord said, sneering in that obnoxious way he had. “What'll it be?”

Trixie admits that the laugh she made was a bit evil, but come on, can you blame me? ANYPONY would laugh like a lunatic at this opportunity.

“MWAHAHAHAHA!” I cackled. “Trixie requests the opportunity to, for the next twenty-four hours, become an ALICORN!”

“REALLY now,” Discord said, looking interested.

“NO! Trixie, this is too much!” Spruce protested. Discord snapped his fingers and turned him into a puppy. I didn't notice until later.

“Very well, Temporary Princess Trixie,” Discord said, pulling out a sheet of paper. “Sign here, please.”

I looked over the form. It looked fairly standard. 'I, the undersigned, do hearby swear that everything I do while taking on this advanced transformation is done of my own free will, without any influence by Discord. Any damage I do of any kind is my own fault and I will take full responsibility for it,' it read. “Seems reasonable,” I said, signing it and giving over the appropriate bits.

“This ought to be good,” Discord said, snapping his fingers. Almost immediately, I felt power filling me. Trixie cannot... It's impossible to describe how it feels in terms that could be understood by mortals. I became AWARE. Of the earth beneath my hooves, of the wind flowing around me, of the leylines of power that made up EVERYTHING.

I could feel my skin stretching as I grew larger, as large as Sparkle was, a tingling suffusing me as my horn grew out, my mind expanding to compensate for the added intake of magical energy.

That's something most don't understand about unicorn horns. They're a conduit. They can absorb and discharge magic. It's why Celestia and Luna are so powerful, because their horns are so big. And the wings... it was painful at first, feeling them grow out of my back, but the pain faded quickly, a short stabbing. And then came the winds. I could feel them more deeply than I could before, like I could grasp them and twist them to my will. My hooves became denser, and I could feel every subtle movement of the earth beneath me, of plants gaining nourishment from the soil, of insects and burrowing rodents moving through the ground...

It's... amazing. I'm never thinking of Earth ponies as weak again. WOW...

“BEHOLD! BEHOLD THE GLORIOUS AND MAGNIFICENT TEMPORARY PRINCESS TRIXIE!” I declared.

“And all across the world,” Discord quipped, ruining my moment, “everypony shuddered in fear without realizing why.”

“Oh, shut up,” I said. “Trixie is enjoying herself. Now where...” I saw Spruce cowering adorably before me. He'd become a little pug puppy, and it was cute beyond compare. “Sweet as this is, Trixie prefers you as a stud.” I summoned my Great and Mighty power, turning him back into a thestral.

“Thank you,” he stammered. “W-What are you going to do?”

“Whatever I choose... within reason, of course,” I said. “The Noble and Heroic Trixie intends to go on ADVENTURES! GRAB MY TAIL, YOU HANDSOME THING!”

“...I'm going to regret this, aren't I?” Spruce said, grabbing my tail in his jaws.

“Probably!” I said, leaping into the air. “AWAY!” I flew into the sky with tremendous speed, dragging the rather unfortunate thestral with me. I felt a tugging on my tail as he held on for dear life. Honestly, I didn't have a destination in mind, I just wanted to fly.

And oh, how good it felt. I could feel the wind flowing over each feather, and I could feel at any moment that I could grab the wind and bend it to my will. I wasn't so much flying as I was pushing the air out of my way. I felt strong. More empowered than ever. No matter what happened to me after this, nothing could take this moment away from me.

We skidded to a halt over a town so small and provincial it made Ponyville look like Canterlot. I let Spruce take a moment to recover himself, looking around. It seemed to be a mostly earth pony town, like Ponyville, with only a small handful of pegasi for managing the weather. No unicorns, from what I could see.

“Trixie...” Spruce said. “We... We have to go back...”

Spoilsport. “Nonsense. We don't even know where we are, so how can we know how to go back?” I said.

I tried not to relish the 'crap, she's right' look on his face too much.

The two of us landed, the ponies scattering a little, looking at the two of us in a mix of awe and fear. Finally, someone with a scroll cutie mark, an older stallion with a dark brown coat and mane, stepped forward.

“Are you... a princess?” he asked.

“No, but I play one on stage,” I joked. Spruce rolled his eyes. “I assure you, my alicornhood is temporary. I am the Great and Powerful Trixie Lulamoon, illusionist extraordinaire. Perhaps you've heard of me?”

“Temporary? How odd... And I'm afraid not,” the mayor-type pony said. “Stableburg's fairly self-sufficient, with all the farms here, so nopony really gets out much beyond the merchants who go to Manehattan for supplies. We've never seen Princess Celestia or Princess Luna either.”

“REALLY now,” I said, fascinated. They really were isolated.

The mayor nodded. “My name is Deep Report,” he said. “I know we sound like a bunch of isolated bumpkins, but we manage to get by. You're more than welcome to visit. It's rare that we get horned visitors. And we've never had a batpony before.”

Spruce's eyes narrowed. “Thestral. The proper term is thestral,” he said.

Deep Report blushed. “My apologies,” he said. “I didn't mean to offend.”

Spruce sighed. “It's fine,” he said. “And we won't be staying long. We just want to get our bearings to get back to Canterlot.”

I chuckled. “Oh, relax,” I teased him. “We should look around, get to know this little town. Who knows? We might discover something interesting.”

“Trixie...” Spruce said.

I ignored him, turning to Deep Report. “I noticed that you don't seem to have many unicorns?”

Deep Report nodded. “Yes, but we're not tribalist. We've just never had unicorns settle in the area. They seem to prefer Manehatten, fifty miles to the south. Honestly, with the two brothers that came here recently and yourself, Miss Lulamoon, this is the most horned ponies we've had in town at once in quite some time.”

“Trixie is fine,” I said. “And brothers?”

Deep Report nodded. “Twins. One with a mustache. Their cutie marks went together, actually, it was rather interesting. Three fourths of an apple on one, a fourth of an apple on the other,” he said. “They wanted to promote a new lumberjacking device they created, and are in the forest preparing a demonstration.”

I frowned. I swear that sounded familiar. Spruce, on the other hoof, looked dismayed. “Did they do a little song and dance number when they brought out the device?” he asked.

Deep Report nodded. “How did you know?”

Spruce facehooved. “Flim and Flam,” he muttered. “Two of the biggest scam artists in Equestria.”

“AH!” I said, smiling. “That's where I've heard of them. Applesnack told me about them.” I think that was the farmer's name, anyway.

“Well, Trixie, you were right,” Spruce said. “We did find out something interesting.”

“Trixie is always right about everything,” I humbly stated.

Deep Report looked worried. “Scam artists?” he said. “Oh dear... I'm glad I insisted on a demonstration before I committed any bits to the project...”

And then came the roar.

It shook me to my core. I knew immediately what it was. I still have nightmares from time to time about that damn bear. But this sounded deeper... more powerful... more ancient.

“An URSA!?” I shrieked. I am NOT ashamed to admit that I was terrified out of my gourd. It's the ONLY sane reaction to the presence of one.

Before anyone could do anything else, the aforementioned scam artists, looking slightly mauled, charged out of the forest, screaming in terror. I caught them in my magic, holding them in place. They kept trying to run.

“LEMMEGOLEMMEGOLEMMEGO!” Flim shrieked in the most unstalliony voice imaginable.

“WHAT DID YOU IDIOTS DO!?!” Spruce snarled.

Flam giggled nervously. “We... ah... our device may have... accidentally of course... injured the cub of an Ursa Major. Where she could see it.”

“...We're all dead,” Deep Report said, wobbling on his hooves, a horrified expression on his face.

“Trixie, let them go. We'll track them down later,” Spruce said. “We need to evacuate the town, and I'll need your help.”

I dropped the idiot twins, taking to the air and looking back. The Ursa Major was crashing through the forest, a massive beast made of pure starstuff, a massive, snaggled jaw, claws the size of Discord's opinion of himself, eyes that bespoke of pure hatred...

Twilight was right. I really could have gone the rest of of my life without knowing what one of those things looked like.

Flying down to where Spruce and the local pegasi were helping people get away, I gave my report.

“That thing is made of pure destruction and scary!” I said helpfully. (Shaddup, I was scared.)

“How soon will it be here?” Spruce asked me.

“Too soon!” I said. The forest may as well not have even been there.

“Not enough time... If it catches up to the townsponies...” Spruce said.

The Ursa Major roared, bursting through the treeline into the town proper. The shrieks of terror from the town doubled as the titanic monster, so much bigger than even my nightmares, burst through. The town and everypony in it was doomed.

Unless...

“No... NO!!” Spruce shouted.

“Spruce... Trixie has what is quite possibly the stupidest idea she's ever had,” I said. I honestly couldn't believe I was having it. I HATED bears. Ursas TERRIFIED me! But it was the only thing I could think of. And as self-centered as I admittedly am, I couldn't just let this thing butcher the town because Flim and Flam are idiots.

Spruce, handsome genius that he is, figured out what I meant immediately. “Trixie... Trixie, you can't! Alicorn or not, that's an URSA MAJOR!”

“I know,” I said, feeling strangely calm. “I have to, though. I'll distract it, try to drive it away. Use the extra time to get everypony to safety.”

“Trixe! TRIXIE!!” Spruce shouted. I barely heard him.

Runawayrunawayrunaway, my brain was telling me as I flew up to the rampaging creature. It tore through some buildings, looking for ponies to unleash its wrath on.

“URSA MAJOR!” I intoned, trying to sound as imposing as possible. “YOU NOW FACE YOUR ULTIMATE OPPONENT!”

It probably would have sounded more impressive if the creature actually listened to me. I saw it spot some fleeing ponies, and turn towards them. I got its attention by shooting a beam of magic at it. It felt more powerful than anything I had ever shot, pure, unadulterated magic flowing through me. It actually rocked the monster to one side, catching its attention.

It roared at me, the force of it pushing me back. “Um... hi?” I managed after a moment. The creature stood up, and swiped at me. I let out a shriek of terror, and dodged out of the way. I so desperately wanted to run, but I knew I couldn't. I kept zapping the creature, flying back into the forest, trying to lead it away from the town.

I thought I was doing pretty well, considering I was basically just poking the thing repeatedly with my magic. But apparently the Ursa Major was intelligent enough to know when to ignore me. I had to fight harder. I couldn't let it get to the townsponies, to Spruce.

(If it ate Flim and Flam, I'd be fine with that. But it'd have to go through the rest of the townsponies to do it, so yeah.)

“We're not done yet!” I shouted. I reached out, grabbing the clouds with my magic. With my pegasus abilities, in addition to the weather magic I already knew for my shows, I drew in the nearby clouds, forming a massive thunderstorm. I directed the lightning directly at the Ursa, raining down my wrath upon it. It roared, thrashing about in anger, but kept going, trying to get away from the lightning.

I was getting desperate. I had to fight it directly. I flew in front of the beast, and began summoning every bit of magic in the area into my horn. “BACK OFF!” I shouted.

The Ursa just roared at me. This thing, the living embodiment of my nightmares (the ones that don't involve Chrysalis, anyway), bellowed its fury at me.

I shivered in fright. But I couldn't just leave. No matter what you think of me, I'm not the type to run without giving it everything I could.

“GO AWAY!” I shouted. “THIS PLACE IS NOT FOR YOU!”

The creature roared at me again. I gulped, said a prayer, and unleashed all the magic I had built up in my horn. To my surprise, the creature actually reacted to it, seemingly pushed back a little by it. I kept funneling power at the thing, trying to push it back, trying to make it leave. The magic flowing through me, it was incredible. I had NEVER felt this strong before.

Twilight Sparkle... was it like this for you?

I pumped more and more power into my blast. The Ursa, to its obvious shock, was being pushed back.

For the first time in my life, I felt that I was living up to the name I gave myself.

“I AM GREAT! I AM POWERFUL! AND BY ALL THAT IS HOLY, YOU WILL KNEEL BEFORE ME, MONSTER!” I shouted, my voice echoing with all the might I was channeling.

I felt a surge of power, the beam I was firing doubling in size. And the Ursa Major... the invincible, deadly, unstoppable Ursa Major... was knocked flat on its star-studded posterior.

The creature, visibly hurt, smoldering from all the energy I hit it with. It glared at me warily. As for me, I was barely able to stand up. But I stood up anyway, as straight as I could, so I wouldn't show it any weakness.

“Leave,” I told it. “Tend to your cub. The ones that hurt it will pay for their crimes.”

The Ursa growled... and walked away. I waited until the stomping footsteps had faded before I collapsed.

The townsponies cautiously made their way back into town. When they saw that the Ursa was defeated, they cheered, lifting me up and giving me the tribute I deserved. I would have preened a bit more, but I was SO dang tired.

Spruce just stared at me, stunned. “You... You beat it...”

I chuckled tiredly. “I'm the Great and Powerful Trixie. Why are you surprised?” I said.

(Truth be told, I was damn lucky that thing left. After that beam, I had NOTHING. But that's just between you and me, readers.)

The town's being rebuilt. Spruce got word back to Canterlot and builders are on the way, along with emergency shelters and food supplies. I'm getting a statue. I'm tempted to ask them to leave the wings, but I decided to actually BE humble about it. I told them about Discord's little shop, my past, and my wish to be an alicorn for a day. They agreed to put up a little plaque on the statue with an abbreviated account, showing my heroic deed for their town.

And yes, I was loving every minute of the praise. Especially since I deserved it.

Flim and Flam got away, but there's warrants out for them now. Their stupidity has finally caught up with them. Twilight's warned Discord about them. Whether or not that shape-shifting doofus will actually turn them in is up for debate...

Hm? Why is this chapter in first person? Interesting story, actually. It turns out that ALL alicorns of a certain age are 'aware' of the Fourth Wall, and that in some realities we're fictional characters. It doesn't really bother me. I'm real in this one, and that's all that counts. Twilight, Princess Cadance, Princess Luna, and Princess Celestia choose to simply ignore the Wall. Me? I wanted to tell my story MY way.

So I stole KnightMysterio's flash drive and threatened to publish the clopfics he wrote for his 'personal use' if he didn't let me tell the story my way. Hee.

So that's Trixie's tale. I hope you enjoyed. And who knows? You may see Trixie again sometime.

TO BE CONTINUED!
Next time: You pick again! 'Cause this was awesome!

Author's Note

Damn it, Trixie... *ahem* No need to think about what I might have or have not written.

Anyway. Trixie won the character poll with 24% of 357 votes, and Alicorn won the transformation poll with 26% of 338 votes.

This went very well, so I'm gonna let you all pick both character and transformation again.

Customer 11: Princess Celestia

Discord’s New Business
Customer 11: Princess Celestia
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners. If you like what you are reading, please support me on Patreon! Contains references to the upcoming MLP movie.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Canterlot...
Evening...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Celestia was bored. And depressed. Things were set for the trial of Jet Set and his thankfully rather small band of idiots, the investigation producing nothing other than a lot of loyalty oaths. Oh, she could probably use powerful mental magic to get them to tell the absolute truth, just to be sure.

But blatant mind manipulation just to get the job done was just so... Starlight Glimmer.

She yawned, signing form after form, rejecting a tax increase on the poor, rejecting a request to privatize medicine, rejecting ten more privatization requests, quickly drafting a law saying that anyone who tried to get her to allow privatization of public services would be summarily executed (she'd never implement it, but writing it as a way of venting felt good), approving a tax increase on the nobility to fund programs for studying non-native Equestrian magic types (griffon magic, zebra magic, and so forth), all sorts of mundane minutia necessary for keeping the country running.

It was five minutes after she finished signing the last form that she realized she was writing on the table.

Celestia blinked. She looked at her inbox, which had nothing in it, and at her outbox, which was full of forms she had signed. “I'm... done? I have actual free time?”

A slow smile spread over her face. She giggled happily. “Done, done, I'm DONE!” she said. She paused. “Well... for today, at least. But still! I'm actually caught up!”

She trotted through the halls, heading for the kitchens to treat herself to some cake. “Let's see...” she said, pulling out a slice of lemon cake leftover from a guard's birthday party. As she ate it, a pleased smile on her face, Luna came in, stretching her wings.

“Good evening, sister,” she said. “It's odd to see you out of your office at this time.”

“I'm actually caught up for once,” Celestia said, giggling.

“That IS rare,” Luna said, helping herself to some fresh fruit.

Celestia smiled warmly. “Did you sleep well, sister?”

Luna nodded. “Indeed,” she said. “Only a few bad dreams, including a recurring one for Starlight Glimmer...”

Celestia frowned. “More fearful fantasies about Chrysalis?” she said.

Luna shook her head. “She takes everything to heart... In this version of the dream, it started rather pleasantly, with Sunburst as a king like Thorax. I thought it would turn into an erotic dream, and was prepared to leave...”

Celestia frowned. “But then it changed, becoming decidedly less pleasant,” she guessed.

Luna sighed. “Yes... 'Sunburst' revealed himself to be Chrysalis in disguise. She then proceeded to mentally torture Starlight, reducing her to little more than a vessel to breed new changelings. That was a difficult dream to unravel. The fantasy was so powerful...” She shook her head. “I was able to break the dream, though. I had to slay the dream Chrysalis to do it, but I managed to quell her fears of the former Queen for now.”

“I'm glad you were able to reassure her,” Celestia said, taking a bite of cake.

“Indeed,” Luna said. “Well, if you have free time, what are your plans?”

Celestia looked thoughtful. “...I haven't visited Queen Novo in a while,” she said. “Not since the birth of young Skystar... And it'd be a perfect excuse to patronize Discord's business...”

Luna gave her sister an amused look. “You do realize she can change you into a seapony herself, don't you?”

“I know,” Celestia said. “But I think it'd be a nice gesture of trust to Discord if I went to him. He has been behaving himself, by his standards anyway, and played a big role in saving us from Chrysalis a few months ago.”

“True...” Luna said. “I suppose you'll want me to handle the sun until you come back?”

“Would you mind?” Celestia asked.

“Not at all,” Luna said. “I don't mind a bit of extra work.”

Celestia finished her cake and stood up, kissing Luna on the cheek. “You're the best,” she said.

“Certainly,” Luna said, smirking. “Have fun. And give her my regards.”

Celestia smiled, and teleported away, reappearing in Discord's home in the chaos dimension.

“Rude,” Discord said, glaring at her. “I might have been on the toilet or something.”

“...Do you even need to use a toilet?” Celestia asked.

“Well, where else am I supposed to find a decent cravat?” Discord said, manifesting a toilet seat lid and wearing it around his neck. He posed regally.

Celestia giggled. “I do apologize. I'll make this quick – I wish to make use of your transformative services.”

Discord blinked, the toilet seat teleporting away. “Interesting... I'm closed, actually, but since it's you of all ponies I'll make an exception.”

“Thank you. I am thinking I'd like to become a seapony,” Celestia said. “I haven't visited Queen Novo in a while, and it'd be nice to catch up.”

Discord looked thoughtful. “Why come to me? Why not just ask her to change you?”

“A couple reasons,” Celestia said. “First one, I wish to surprise her. Two, I wish to show that I trust you after you helped save us all from Chrysalis.”

Discord blushed. “Well, that's... didn't really do that much...” he muttered.

Celestia smiled. “You, Thorax, Trixie, and Starlight saved Equestria. You were captured, yes, but it was while helping others, Discord. That doesn't diminish the bravery of your act at all.”

Discord giggled despite himself. “Gawrsh, you're gonna make me feel all gushy inside,” he said in a silly voice. “Okay. You put in a very good mood, so I won't charge you. Also, because you're being nice, I'll just teleport you to Seaquestria the normal way.”

Celestia blinked. “How were you going to send me before?”

“Flushing you down a toilet,” Discord said, a smirk on his face.

“...You cheeky bastard,” Celestia said, unable to keep from smiling.

Discord cackled and snapped his fingers. Celestia vanished, a momentary dizziness overcoming her as she suddenly found herself in a new body, deep within the ocean. Her eyes steadily refocused, getting used to the near absolute darkness as she looked herself over.

Her head was still the same, as were her forehooves. Her coat, however, changed into crystalline white fish-scales at her hips, her hindquarters now a long, fishlike tail with wide, ethereal fins that were the same color as her mane, one fin bearing her cutie mark on it. Her wings had become fins as well, as had her mane. Instead of a horn, her head now sported a trio of blue, glowing antenna, a gold fin crest forming around her neck. Her tiara drifted away, with no mane to hold it in place. Celestia concentrated, teleporting it back to the palace, her antenna glowing with light.

Celestia giggled, taking a moment to get used to swimming, and headed off for Seaquestria. The kingdom was a short distance away, glistening spires that shone beneath the darkness of the water. As she approached the city, a pair of guards came up to her.

“HALT!” the two armored seapony mares said.

Celestia halted, smiling.

“State your business in Seaquestria!” one said.

“Please inform Queen Novo Oceanica that Princess Celestia Dawnschild of Equestria is here for a friendly visit,” Celestia said, smiling.

The guards blinked. They conversed quickly, one of them heading into the city. A few minutes later, the guard came back.

“Please forgive us, your highness,” she said. “We are simply doing our jobs.”

Celestia smiled benevolently. “Of course. I cannot fault you your caution,” she said. The guards opened the gate, letting Celestia inside, another pair of seapony guards there to escort her to the palace.

As she swam, she smiled as she took in the sites of the kingdom of Seaquestria. Beautiful coral buildings lined the swim paths, the darkness lit up by luminous plants and the lights of each seapony's own antenna.

Finally, Celestia and her escorts reached the massive, blue coral palace of the royal family. She was led inside, Queen Novo waiting for her. She was beautiful, every motion as flowing as the water. She had large, purple fins on her tail, head, and for wings, a blue, peytral-like crest around her neck. Unlike the other seaponies, who had a single glowing antenna, she bore three of varying sizes. On her head was a v-shaped crown, fitted to her head so it didn't float away in the water.

“Celestia, darling!” the white and purple regal seapony said, swimming over and hugging the transformed alicorn. “You should have told me you were coming! I would have had a proper welcome ready!”

Celestia grinned. “I wanted to surprise you. It's been too long since our last visit, old friend.”

“Indeed!” Novo said, her triple antenna bobbing slightly in the water. “Come! Join me for lunch!”

Celestia nodded. “Sounds lovely, Novo.” The two rulers swam through the elegantly crafted coral halls to a dining area, taking a seat at a long table.

Novo clapped her hooves. Soon after, a group of chefs came out, carrying a large salad and two glasses of shrimps. “Seablossom and seaweed salad, and if you're willing, shrimp cocktails.”

Celestia smiled. “It'd be rude to refuse offered food,” she said. Besides, as an alicorn, even an alicorn seapony, her stomach could handle almost anything.

The two ate, chatting amiably among themselves. “Princess Skystar's really growing into her role,” Novo said proudly. “She's such a ray of light, always so cheerful.”

Celestia grinned. “Perhaps you could bring her on a visit to my kingdom sometime,” she said.

Novo sighed. “Perhaps one day,” she said. “But like you and your responsibility to the sun, I have a responsibility to help maintain the tides and protect the oceans.”

Celestia nodded. “Heavy is the head that wears the crown,” she said softly. She smirked at Novo, and added, “Even if it does have to be physically attached so it doesn't float away.”

The seapony queen giggled at the joke. “Still, it is good to know that you've your sister back these past few years,” Novo said, brightening. “I cannot imagine how lonely it was without her. She's maintaining the sun while you enjoy this spell the Madness Bringer cast upon you, correct?”

Celestia grinned. “You never miss a thing, do you?”

“The waters of the world are mine,” Novo said, smirking. “Very little is hidden from my eyes. However, I cannot fathom your reasoning for giving Discord a chance...”

“I had a vision,” Celestia said softly. “I had a vision that Discord would play a vital role in Equestria's defense. My visions have never been wrong, so I had to take that chance. Twice over, that has been proven true. Discord may have betrayed us to Tirek initially, but if he had not, then he would have never learned the value of true friendships, and my student and her friends would have never gained the Rainbow Power. More recently, he was one of four heroic individuals who helped rescue me, my sister, and so many others from the clutches of Queen Chrysalis. In doing so, they also saved the changeling race from her control. More and more changelings are turning away from her and joining King Thorax.”

Novo frowned. “Well... I will trust your judgment. You've done a lot of good for the world, and for the seas,” she said. “Still, I am rather mad at him for turning my castle into ice cream during his last rampage.”

“Perfectly understandable,” Celestia said.

“I mean, do you know how bad watered-down ice cream tastes?” Novo said.

Celestia blinked. “Did you... did you try to eat your castle after it was transformed?”

“Well I couldn't let all that ice cream go to waste!” Novo said. The two royals giggled. “So how long will you be a seapony?”

“For twenty four hours,” Celestia said. “The way Discord's spell works, I will be automatically teleported to the nearest safe spot upon the spell's reversion.”

“Seems fair,” Novo said. “You are welcome to rest here tonight. Tomorrow, I wish to show you an island I discovered that has fresh fig trees.”

“Oooh, sounds tasty!” Celestia said, smiling.

The two rulers spent the night chatting, Celestia eventually retiring to a guest room. She slept peacefully, on a hollowed-out giant clam with natural cushioning. The water flowing around her gills was relaxing, caressing her coat and scales...

“So how are you, sister?” said Luna as she appeared in Celestia's dreamscape. The two were swimming in a sea of stars, Luna taking the shape of a seapony herself.

Celestia grinned. “Oh, it's delightful to catch up with old friends. I should really do it more often,” she said.

“Indeed,” Luna said. “I was actually shocked to find out that some ponies think the hippocampi are a myth.”

“My own fault,” Celestia said, sighing a little as the two sisters swam around the moon. “I became so wrapped up in trying to keep Equestria together, trying to prepare for the prophecy of your return, that I forgot to keep in touch with old friends.

Luna smiled, nuzzling Celestia. “You have the time now,” she said. “You have me. Mi Amore. Twilight. And I'm pretty sure you can get Fluttershy browbeat Discord into doing something useful.”

Both sisters giggled at that. “You are right as always, dearest Luna,” Celestia said. “Now come. First one to the Andromeda Galaxy buys the cake upon my return!”

The two sisters took off, racing through the night sky towards the distant galaxy. Luna ended up winning, Celestia waking up in a good mood.

To her surprise, though, she had a visitor.

“Eep!” the cream-colored seapony said, her sky blue finlike mane billowing as she swam out of the room. She peeked in again, nervous, her light antenna bobbing.

Celestia smiled benevolently. “It's all right, little one,” she said. “I won't harm you.”

The seapony swam back in, revealing that she had two antenna instead of one, and had a cluster of seaberries mounted on one ear, like a flower. She had a pink coral crest around her neck. She smiled, blushing. “Um... hi... I'm Princess Skystar.”

Celestia grinned. “Greetings, your highness. I am Princess Celestia, diarch of Equestria.”

Skystar giggled. “That's like Seaquestria...” she said.

“Indeed,” Celestia said. “What brings you here?”

“I was curious,” Skystar said. “If you rule Equestria, why are you a princess instead of a queen, like my mother? And... and can you really command the sun?”

“I can indeed, dear Skystar,” Celestia said. “Were we near the surface, I could show you. But I sense my sister, whom I rule alongside, has already raised it for me.” She smiled wistfully. “As for why my sister Luna and I are princesses... It is partially because we wish to rule as equals. If one of us claimed queenship, the other would be deemed inferior in status. Because of past events, I refuse to let that happen again.”

“Oh... I think I understand...” Skystar said. “You want to share power with your sister so she doesn't feel bad...”

“Something like that, yes,” Celestia said.

“Mother said the two of you are going to the surface, to an island with fig trees,” Skystar said.

“That's the plan,” Celestia said as she got up and went to an armoire to prepare for the day.

Skystar fidgeted, twiddling her hooves nervously. “...Can I come with you?” she asked. “I've never been to the surface... Never seen the sun...”

Celestia looked over to her. “That's more a question to ask your mother, isn't it?”

Skystar blushed. “I... I get nervous when I try to ask her things directly...” she said.

“Why?” Celestia asked.

“I dunno... It just is...” Skystar said, looking away, her ears lowered.

Celestia swam over and hugged the young princess. “Oh dear... You really are young...” she said. Celestia had only heard of Skystar's birth from a letter Novo had sent. Skystar wasn't much older than Twilight, having not lived anywhere near her immortal mother's long life.

Skystar blushed at the hug, not sure how to react. Celestia backed away, smiling benevolently at her fellow princess. “She's your mother, Skystar. She won't get angry at you without reason. Do not be afraid to ask her things, even requests as simple as this.”

Skystar bit her lip. “...Would you come with me when I ask her?” she asked.

Celestia nodded. “Of course, my dear,” she said. The seapony alicorn finished her preparations for the day, and followed Skystar into the throne room.

“Ah! Skystar!” Novo said once they entered the throne room. “Dearest daughter, it always does my heart good to see you.” She swam over and hugged her.

Skystar beamed at the hug, hugging her mother back. She looked over to Celestia, who nodded reassuringly. Taking a deep breath, Skystar asked, “Mother... can I come with you and Princess Celestia to see the island today?”

Novo blinked. “What brought this on?” she asked.

Skystar fidgeted. “I've... I've never seen the surface, and now we have the Princess of the Sun here, and... Neverminditwasadumbquestion...” she stammered as her nerve broke. She tried to flee, but Novo was faster, swimming in front of her.

“Nonono, it's okay!” Novo said, hugging Skystar again. “I would love to have you accompany us. We'll be taking some guards, so it should be okay.”

“Really!?” Skystar said, grinning and glomping Novo. “Thank you! Thankyouthankyouthankyou!”

Novo grinned. “We'll be leaving after breakfast,” she said. “Be ready by then.”

Skystar swam off happily, to prepare herself. Novo sighed happily. “So cute...”

“She really is,” Celestia said. “You must be proud.”

“She is my daughter,” Novo said. “I cannot see any reason why I wouldn't be proud of her.”

Breakfast passed quickly, Novo, Celestia, Skystar, and an entourage of guards readying to head to the surface. At the edge of the city, Novo stepped ahead of the group, creating a glowing portal in the sea in front of them, her antenna glowing brightly.

“This will take us directly to the island,” she explained, swimming on through. The others followed her, breaking through into the shallows of a beautiful tropical island.

“Ooooh!” Skystar said, awestruck. “Everything... everything feels lighter... And... what's that I feel?”

“That's wind, Skystar,” Celestia explained. “It flows like water through the skies.”

“Oh wow!” Skystar said. “Everything... It's so amazing! And BRIGHT!”

Celestia floated lazily in the water, smiling up at the sun. “Indeed...” she said. “Shall we?”

Novo swam up to Skystar. “Let me show you how to move on the surface,” she said. She whispered to Skystar for a moment, the princess nodding. Her antenna glowed as she concentrated. She swam up onto shore... a trail of water following her, allowing her to move easily on land. She beamed brightly. “I did it, mother!”

Novo grinned. “That you did! The spell will last you until you touch another body of water,” she explained, she, Celestia, and her guards following her up to the surface.

Skystar bounced happily. “This is so amazing!” she said, looking around at all the swaying trees and grass. “So many new things to see!”

“Aahh, so cute,” Celestia said. “I haven't seen that much cute since Twilight was a filly...”

“You really must introduce us one day,” Novo said, chuckling.

“Perhaps that can be arranged one day,” Celestia promised. The entourage moved further into the island, finding where the fig trees were. The royals helped themselves to the rich, juicy fruits, managing to cajole the guards into having some as well.

After everypony ate their fill, they went back to the beach to rest. But as they did, though...

“WHAT IS THIS!?” Novo said. A ship had docked while they were enjoying their snacks. In the distance was a large ship with a pirate flag on it, a pony skull and crossbones. The guards cursed themselves for not noticing the ship, and brought their spears to bear.

“Arrr!” said the griffon in a bandanna and eyepatch. “It seems we have ourselves some seaponies!”

The griffon's companion, a large gray dragoness, grinned. “Aye. Those are rare! They'll fetch a fine price!”

“You'll not take us!” Celestia said, her antenna flaring. But before she could prepare an attack spell, the dragoness used her firebreath, Novo quickly throwing up a shield spell to protect them. This, however, was a feint. The griffon threw out a sphere, which exploded into a heavy, weighted net that wrapped around the group, nullifying Novo's magic.

“W-What?!” Novo said as she and her guards were pinned down by the heavy net.

“Antispell material,” the griffon pirate explained. “Compressed down for easy carrying. Made from the same stuff used in horn restraints. Looks like it works on seaponies as well as regular ponies!”

The dragoness cackled, closing the net and flying back to the ship with the seaponies in tow, the griffon staying to raid the fruit trees on the island. The ship itself was crewed with varying species, ponies of varying tribes, a couple zebras, Diamond Dogs, minotaurs, catfolk, and griffons.

The captain, a grey-furred catfolk in a flowing blue captain's cloak sauntered forward. “Well well, Sizzle,” she said. “What have we here?”

Skystar was hugging Novo fearfully, Novo and Celestia glaring at the pirate captain. The guards were all struggling to bring their tridents to bear, the dragoness picking them out of the net and tossing the weapons aside.

“Captain Hathor,” the dragoness said. “We found seaponies on the island. Important ones, from the look of it.”

Captain Hathor purred. “Indeed... This is a rare find,” she said, tracing a claw along Novo's cheek. “They'll fetch a grand price at the slave markets!”

The gathered pirates cheered, although some of the pony crew members weren't as enthusiastic. Something about one of the seaponies in the net bothered them...

“Throw them in the brig, Sizzle,” Captain Hathor said. “Keep the net on them until we can craft more solid restraints. We'll ship off once Gordi returns with the food.”

The dragoness nodded, Sizzle descending below deck with the prisoners. She ignored their protests as she tossed them roughly into the ship's brig, huffing a burst of flame over them and laughing as she went back to join her captain.

Skystar shivered fearfully. “Mama? What's going to happen?” she asked.

“We'll figure out something...” Novo said, her mind racing as she tried to figure something out, the guards prodding at the knot holding them in the net to try and undo it. Celestia herself was at something of a loss...

The door opened, the pony crewmembers walking carefully into the brig. “Um...” said the apparent leader, a unicorn mare with a sword cutie mark. “...Are you Princess Celestia?”

Celestia nodded. “I am. I am temporarily transformed,” she said, “but I am Celestia.”

The ponies all flinched, looking at each other fearfully. “Um... If we free you,” the unicorn said, “can we expect leniency?”

“At most, you will be exiled and jailed,” Celestia said.

“...Just exiled and jailed?” said a large stallion wearing pants.

“It's always rather amusing to me that ponies think that exiling someone and jailing them in the exiled place is the worst I can do,” Celestia said, grinning savagely. “I've lived for ages, child. I am FAR more creative than that!”

The stallion wearing pants soiled himself in fear at the comment.

“Eeeww...” Skystar said, wrinkling her nose at the smell.

“FREE US,” Novo commanded.

The unicorn mare nodded fearfully, unlocking the brig and pulling out a sword, using it to cut open the net. Once they were free, Novo summoned water through the port hole to give the seaponies their mobility back.

“So now what?” the unicorn mare asked.

“Get to the lifeboats and wait on the island,” Novo growled. “This ship is about to sink.”

“And wash up,” Skystar commanded the pants-wearing stallion. “You stink.”

The stallion nodded helplessly, whimpering as he trotted away with the other ponies, discreetly heading for the lifeboats.

“What are we going to do, mother?” Skystar asked.

“Seapony diplomacy,” Novo said simply, her antenna glowing. The guards all grinned viciously, while Celestia just shook her head in amusement.

“Huh?” Skystar asked.

“'Seapony diplomacy' is your mother's cute way of saying is that she's going to indulge in the gleeful application of excessive amounts of overkill,” Celestia said.

Skystar still looked confused. Celestia just smirked. “Listen,” she said.

Skystar did. “...Rushing water?”

“Brace yourself,” Novo said, a savage grin on her face.

The tsunami struck the ship a moment later, destroying it completely and sending all of the pirates into the sea. Novo, forming a protective bubble around her entourage, floated over to where Captain Hathor was clinging to a board. She looked up fearfully at Novo.

“I am Queen Novo Oceanica. As Celestia is to the sun, so I am to the seas. You have TRESPASSED in my realm. Consider yourself lucky that I decided destroying your ship and letting you face Equestrian justice for your crimes is enough.”

“Goody,” Celestia muttered. “More paperwork...”

Novo giggled. “My apologies. Shall I simply drown them all?” she joked.

Captain Hathor squeaked fearfully.

Celestia shook her head. “No, no, I'll send a message to the guard,” she said. “Really, though, your sense of humor needs work.”

“Sorry,” Novo said. “I was simply trying to make a splash. I can't help it if my jokes are all wet.”

“I'm leaving, Novo,” Celestia deadpanned, trying to exit the bubble.

Novo laughed. “I'm sorry for real this time!” she said. “We'll hold them until you change back. In the meantime, we'll treat you to a concert.”

Celestia grinned. She started to accept the offer, but Skystar tugged at both her mother and Celestia. “Um, I think the dragon is drowning.”

“HEELP!” Sizzle glubbed, desperately struggling in the water. “I can't swim!!!”

Novo rolled her eyes and gestured, sudden waves washing all the pirates upon shore. One of the guards poked the soaking, sobbing dragoness. “What kind of pirate can't swim?” she asked.

“One that can flyyyy...” Sizzle moaned, whimpering.

The seaponies all giggled. “I should probably send a few letters out, to let ponies know about the pirates. Twilight, the captain of the guard...” Celestia said. “Still, plenty of time left to enjoy ourselves.”

“Indeed,” Novo said.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Later that evening...
Another world...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Sunset Shimmer sat on a bench in a park, the red-haired human reading the latest entry from her friend with amusement.

Pinkie Pie and Sonata Dusk came up to her. “Hiya Sunset!” Pinkie Pie said.

“Hey Pinkie, hey Sonata,” Sunset said. “How are things going?”

“Pretty good,” Sonata said. “I love my job at Taco Fred's. Aria's adjusting pretty well. Adagio's still grumpy, though.” The former siren stretched. “Honestly, she needs to get over it. We lost. We can't hypnotize anyone anymore, but we're re-learning how to sing, and we're getting by, getting our bills paid.”

Sunset nodded. The crystals that turned the three seapony sisters into the deadly sirens had also augmented their singing ability. They had relied on it for so long that when the crystals were shattered, their voices showed the effects of not practicing for so long, the magical enhancement gone.

Pinkie Pie hugged Sonata. “I know I've said it before, but I'm really glad you girls aren't evil anymore. I'd much rather have friends instead of enemies!”

“Now if we could convince Rainbow Dash of that,” Sunset said, chuckling.

Sonata rolled her eyes. “Aria likes fighting with her. I was the hunter, Dagi was the planner, but Aria was the one who did all the fighting when our magic didn't work,” she said.

Pinkie Pie giggled. “So what's up?” she asked, noticing the magical journal that connected this world to Equestria. “Any news from ponyland?”

“Well... Discord's been running a business where he transforms anypony who pays him for a day,” Sunset said. “Apparently, Celestia let herself be turned into a seapony and caught some pirates with Queen Novo. She also mentioned something about Novo using 'seapony diplomacy' on them.” She frowned. “I wish I paid more attention in Cultural Studies. I was so focused on learning magic.”

Sonata giggled. “Nice to know that Novo's still the ham she was over a thousand years ago,” she said.

Sunset blinked. “You understand this 'seapony diplomacy' reference?”

Sonata nodded. “The human equivalent would be carpet bombing. With nuclear weapons.”

Sunset and Pinkie's jaws dropped. “...Eep,” Pinkie said.

“Yeah, Novo and the concept of overkill have had a long, lasting love affar,” Sonata said.

“...All righty then,” Sunset said, looking down at the journal again.

“What's up?” Pinkie said after a moment.

“...I think I'm gonna go back to Equestria this weekend,” Sunset said.

Pinkie Pie and Sonata traded confused looks. “Really? Why?” Sonata asked.

“This whole transformation business of Discord's has me too curious,” Sunset said, smirking. “If nothing else, it'll be good for a laugh.”

Pinkie Pie giggled. “Bring us back some Equestrian sweets!” she said.

Sunset nodded, making plans in her head...

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Sunset Shimmer transforms!

Author's Note

Sorry that took so long! Writer’s block is a pain in the patella, I swear.

Anyway. Yay! Celestia won the character vote with 21% of 397 votes, and Seapony/Siren won the transformation vote with 25% of 421 votes.

Plus, we had guest appearances of Queen Novo and Princess Skystar from the upcoming My Little Pony movie! Whoo! I hope you enjoyed it.

Next time, we’re using a specific character. Sunset Shmmer is visiting Equestria! Vote for what she changes into here!

Customer 12: Sunset Shimmer

Discord's New Business
Customer 12: Sunset Shimmer
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit reasons. If you like my work, please support me on Patreon or with a Paypal donation!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Canterlot High School...
Saturday morning...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Sunset Shimmer took a deep breath as she stared at the statue. She'd only gone back a couple times since first coming here to this world. She knew she'd have to talk to Celestia at some point, knew that her mentor was waiting for her. But she just wasn't ready... she wasn't ready to forgive herself yet.

“Just... just gonna hang around for a day,” Sunset said. “Try out this transformation thing, and be done with it...”

She hesitated a few moments longer, and stepped through.

A feeling of numbness spread through her, her body seemingly warping and distorting as she fell through an aura of rainbow magic.

With an unceremonious plop, she fell out of the mirror, the unicorn landing in a pile of books. “Ngggh...” she grunted.

“Hi Sunset,” said Spike, the little dragon watching with amusement.

Sunset rolled her eyes, and pushed her way out of the book pile. She staggered, instinctively trying to stand on her hind legs, only to stumble.

“I've been away too long,” Sunset said, chuckling and shaking her head as she finally settled on four hooves. “Is Twilight here?”

Spike shook his head. “'Fraid not,” he said. “She asked me to wait here for you after you wrote her about wanting to try Discord's services. And speaking of which...”

“He's not here either,” Sunset said, looking annoyed.

Spike chuckled. “Nope. He's actually gone to check a legal matter in Canterlot. He keeps getting requests for permanent changes and he's wondering if he can find a way to get away with it.”

Sunset frowned. “...What are people asking to be permanently changed into and why are they going to the Lord of Disharmony to do it?”

“Former Lord of Disharmony. And honestly, I'd rather not think about it,” Spike said, shrugging. “Anyway, you're not out of luck yet, if you still want to get changed.”

“Why's that?” Sunset asked.

“Our world's Fluttershy is filling in for him. Turned her into a draconequus and everything,” Spike said.

Sunset blinked, and grinned. “Okay, on sheer novelty value alone, I have to see this,” she said. Spike chuckled, leading her to Discord's stand, where Fluttershy was waiting, calmly sitting at the stand.

“Oh wow...” Sunset said as she looked Fluttershy over.

The draconequus blushed, her squirrel tail flicking. “Sunset Shimmer, right? Twilight's told me about you,” she said.

“Oh yeah?” Sunset asked, a little nervous.

Fluttershy nodded, smiling happily. “She says she's very proud of how far you've come, and considers you a redemption success story,” she said.

Sunset beamed happily. “I... If you see her before me, tell her I said thanks,” she said.

Fluttershy nodded. “Was there anything else?” she asked.

Sunset smiled. “Actually, yeah... I was wondering if you could transform me?”

Fluttershy nodded. “Of course! And because you're a friend of Twilight's, I won't charge you.”

“Gee, thanks Fluttershy!” Sunset said happily. She leaned down to look at the choices. “Heh... I've always wondered what it would be like to be a dragon...”

Spike smiled. “Well, we are the baddest, most awesome things in the world,” he said, flexing.

Fluttershy and Sunset giggled. “Okay, I can turn you into a dragon,” Fluttershy said. She snapped her fingers, creating a magical pop.

Sunset turned into a fiery yellow pile of Smooze.

“...” Spike coughed. “Um, Fluttershy?”

Fluttershy squeaked in fright. “I can fix this! I can!” She snapped her fingers again.

Sunset turned into Twilight Sparkle.

“Oh no, it's Lavender Alicorn Syndrome!” Spike said, laughing.

“This is about as funny as a hole in the head,” Sunset muttered.

“Oh dear!” Fluttershy said, wincing. “Um...” She snapped her fingers again. This time Sunset turned into Starlight Glimmer.

“I'm starting to get a little offended here,” Sunset said.

Fluttershy squeaked in dismay, wondering how in blazes Discord got the right transformation every time. She snapped her fingers over and over again. Sunset changed into an Earth pony, a Diamond Dog, a quarry eel, a Cybertronian, a catfolk, VanossGaming, a Hulk, a cheese sandwich, an arcade machine, a horn on Spike's head, a female Slenderman in her Canterlot High clothes, a draconequus, the abstract concept of pizza, you the reader, an update to Waking Nightmares (I'm sorry), a chimicherrychanga, Pinkie Pie, Moondancer, Half-Life 3 confirmed (I'm not sorry), a Mobian squirrel, a boulder, Lola Bunny, living liquid metal, a fluffy pony, ten different Pokémon, her human self...

“STOPIT!” Sunset yelled as Fluttershy was about to snap her fingers again. Fluttershy squeaked and hid under the stand. Spike scratched at the spot Sunset had been on his head, still feeling weird about it.

“I-I'm sorry...” Fluttershy said. “I guess... I guess I still need to get a handle on this magic.”

Sunset fumed angrily for a moment and sighed. “It's all right,” she said. “At least I'm stuck in a form I'm familiar with.”

Fluttershy looked up. “...Your dress is pretty,” she said.

Sunset smiled. “Thanks,” she said. “The other world's Rarity designed it for me.”

Spike looked thoughtful. “What are you going to do now?” he asked.

Sunset sighed, rubbing her temples. “I wanted to talk to Princess Celestia, but this... This just killed my nerve completely...” she said.

Fluttershy started to tear up. “I'm sorry...” she said.

“No, no,” Sunset said, shaking her head. “It's okay,” she said. “It's my own damn cowardice...” She sighed. “Tell Twilight I said hi, okay?”

Fluttershy nodded. “I'm so, so sorry about this...”

“Don't worry about it,” Sunset said, walking back to the castle, Spike accompanying her. She didn't get much reaction from the citizens of Ponyville, half of them being transformed themselves at this point.

“You sure about this? I'm sure Celestia wouldn't mind seeing you now,” Spike said.

Sunset sighed. “I know, it's just...” She shook her head. “I can't. I thought I was ready, but...” She shook her head. “I can't...”

Spike frowned. “I can't force you,” he said, discreetly planning on writing a letter to Princess Celestia once she was gone.

“Thank you...” Sunset said.

They arrived in the mirror room, Sunset leaning down and giving Spike a hug. “See you later, little guy,” she said.

Spike hugged her back. “Bye Sunset,” he said.

She stepped back through the portal... and immediately noticed something wrong. She felt herself going through the familiar sensation of changing, her body warping.

She fell through the statue on the other side of the portal... as a unicorn. “WHAT THE!?” she said, looking herself over. Indeed, she was her Equestrian self as before. But this time, her clothes had not changed with her. She wriggled out of her dress and jacket, staring in alarm at her hooves, her magic pendant hanging off of her horn. She checked herself over, her magic flaring as she tested it, and took a deep breath to calm herself.

“Okay. Okay, Sunset Shimmer. Just calm down. So long as no one notices... you...” Slowly she turned, sensing someone behind her. Principal Celestia and Vice-Principal Luna were standing there, staring at Sunset in shock. The two school officials were rather shocked to see a little yellow pony the size of a large dog standing there.

“Uh... Hi?” Sunset said, grinning weakly. “What... what are you two doing here?”

“We have some school matters to take care of,” Principal Celestia said. “Is... is that you, Sunset?”

Sunset grinned sheepishly. “Yeah. This is... this is what I really look like.”

The two principals traded confused looks. “How?” Celestia asked.

Sunset fidgeted. “Can we talk inside, please? I'm a little uncomfortable out in the open like this,” she said, gathering up her clothes with her magic.

Nodding, unnerved, the two principals made their way inside, unlocking the door for Sunset and taking her to Celestia's office.

“Why are you a unicorn now?” Luna asked, visibly baffled.

Sunset sighed. “...This is gonna take some time to explain,” she said. She told them about Discord, his history in Equestria and his reform, such as it was.

“...My counterpart took a huge risk in unleashing him,” Celestia said, visibly unhappy.

“I know... But as crazy at it sounds, if he didn't learn that lesson, then Tirek would have torn Equestria apart,” Sunset said.

“Placing all your bets on a madman gaining a conscience... insane...” Luna said. “So he's the one who did this?”

“Not... quite,” Sunset said, looking sheepish. “Discord, apparently on a random whim, decided to open a business, going through all the boring processes of getting a license for it. It's an entertainment business, where anyone who pays him can be transformed into anything they like for one day, with all basic knowledge of that race's abilities. Like, say, if you were an Earth pony and wanted to be a pegasus or something, you'd gain all basic pegasus knowledge upon changing. Cloudwalking, weather control, that sort of thing...”

“...Oddly intriguing,” Luna said, smirking.

“Don't even think about it,” Celestia said, glaring at Luna, who just gave her sister a neutral look. Celestia sighed, and motioned for Sunset to continue.

Sunset nodded. “When I got there, Discord was away on business. Fluttershy let herself be turned into a draconequus to fill in for him. She's not quite as skilled as he is with chaos magic, though, and ended up turning me into my human form...”

Celestia understood. “And so when you came back through the portal, it reversed things, so you're a pony here instead of in Equestria,” she said.

Sunset nodded. “It should just be for a full twenty-four hours,” she said. “But I really don't want to be seen like this...”

Luna nodded. “Indeed. People are already asking questions about all the magical happenings,” she said. “To add an actual alien pony in the mix...”

Celestia looked thoughtful. “What are your plans?” she asked.

“I was going to get the girls here, see if I could stay at one of their places until I change back,” Sunset said.

Celestia nodded, a smirk coming to her face. Luna grinned as well, the same thought occurring to her.

“...What's so funny?” Sunset asked.

“Fluttershy's gonna go through the roof,” the principal said.

“Huh?” Sunset asked.

Luna giggled. “Sunset, do you have any idea how adorable you are by human standards?”

Sunset blushed. “Buh?!”

Celestia went outside to make the calls, Luna staying with Sunset. “I'm serious. Almost every little girl I knew as a child was in love with unicorns and magic to some extent. Even some of the guys I knew as a child like unicorns. You look like something that could be bought in the plush toy section of a toy store.”

Sunset blushed brightly. “I'm... I'm not sure how I feel about that...”

Celestia finished her calls, and a few minutes later, the Rainbooms, Sonata Dusk accompanying them, drove up to the school.

“Can't believe we're heading to school on a weekend,” Rainbow Dash muttered.

“Now, y'know we're here to help Sunset,” Applejack said.

Fluttershy wrung her hands, worried. “Oh, I hope she's all right. I wish Principal Celestia was more specific about what was wrong...”

“No matter what it is, though, we'll be there for her,” Rarity said firmly as they reached the door. “Now come.”

The door was unlocked, and the group went inside, heading straight for the principal's office. Celestia met them outside.

“Principal Celestia, we're here to help,” Twilight said. “What's wrong with Sunset?”

“Nothing critical, I assure you,” Celestia said, smiling. “But she would like some privacy for the next twenty-four hours, and needs your help in procuring that.”

The Rainbooms all traded confused looks. Celestia, with a flourish, opened the door to her office, revealing a nervously grinning unicorn.

Sonata Dusk doubled-over with laughter.

“Hi girls,” Sunset said, waving a hoof. “It's... a bit complicated to explain but... this is what I really look like.”

The Rainbooms stared for a long moment, unsure of what to think.

Most of them, at any rate.

“Omigosh you're so CYUUUUUTE!” Fluttershy squealed, rushing into the room and picking Sunset up, hugging her happily. Sunset blushed brightly, her muzzle scrunching up in embarrassment, Sonata laughing even harder.

“Toldja,” Luna said simply, folding her arms and smirking.

“And guess what, Fluttershy?” Sonata said. “Equestria's full of ponies just as adorable as Sunset! Perhaps more so! You should see what foals are like!”

“EEEEE!” Fluttershy squeed, hugging Sunset tighter.

“Fluttershy... air plz...” Sunset choked.

“S-Sorry,” Fluttershy said, loosening her grip. “But you're just so adorable!”

Sunset flailed. “Yes. Fine. Great. Put me down, please!”

Fluttershy let her go, the other Rainbooms gathering around the unicorn as she sat down on the floor.

“I have SO MANY questions!” Twilight said, grinning.

“And I'll be happy to answer them,” Sunset said. “I just... need a place to hide out until this wears off in a day.”

“You'll go back to being human?” Rarity asked.

Sunset nodded. “I'll go back to what my default state for this world is, yes. Things just got reversed.”

Pinkie Pie blinked, and then grinned. “Oh, so you got turned into a human over there by Fluttershy's counterpart turned into a dracowhateveritis only because she's not as skilled at chaos magic as the person who transformed her is so she accidentally turned you into several different things until you stopped her at human?” she said.

Now everyone was staring at Pinkie Pie.

“...Princess Twilight did a thesis on Pinkie Pie one time,” Sunset said, apparently randomly.

“Which one?” Sonata asked.

“Both of them,” Sunset said. “It was three pages long, and consisted of nothing but variations on the phrase 'Pinkie Logic, don't try to figure it out, just move on with your life.'”

“My brilliance and knowledge defies the world at large!” Pinkie Pie declared.

Everyone laughed at that.

“Getting back to the subject at hand... Chaos magic did this to you?” Applejack asked.

“I'm betting Discord,” Sonata said. “He was a troublemaker back when Dagi, Aria and I were most active. He always made it a point to attend our shows, though...”

Sunset nodded. “Like I said, I'll explain later. Right now, I just want to get to a place where I won't have to explain the presence of a magical talking unicorn,” she almost pleaded.

Applejack looked thoughtful. “Apple Bloom's on a sleepover at Scootaloo's for a couple days,” she said. “And pretty much nothing phases Big Mac and Granny. I think we can let ya stay at the farm for a day.”

Sunset smiled gratefully. The group, sans Celestia and Luna who actually did have work to do, drove to Sweet Apple Acres, Applejack taking the time to explain the situation to Big Macintosh and Granny Smith first.

“...So, is it all right if she stays here for a day?” Applejack asked.

Big Macintosh just shrugged. “Eeyup. Granny?”

Granny Smith stroked her chin, and shrugged as well. “Why not? All this weird magical hoo-ha's been happenin' all over the dang place. Why not here as well?”

Applejack hugged the two of them, grinning and running out to the barn where everyone had gathered. Fluttershy had insisted on Sunset sitting on her lap, the unicorn blushing as she explained why she was a unicorn for now, putting detail to Pinkie Pie's randomly lucky guess.

“Who'd wanna get turned into something they're not?” Sonata muttered.

“I dunno,” Rainbow Dash said. “I think it'd be kinda cool to be turned into... I dunno, a griffon or something.”

“Hearing Sonata tell us about the life she and the Sirens led before they become antagonistic... I wouldn't mind seeing what it's like to be a seapony,” Rarity said. “There's so much beauty under the sea.”

“We are best friends now,” Sonata declared, grinning.

“We REALLY need to throw a pony party for Sunset now!” Pinkie Pie said. “But what would we even SERVE!? Maybe cupcakes with icing shaped like things ponies eat?”

“That's a good question, though,” Applejack said. “What can you eat like this, Sunset?”

“No meat,” Sunset said. “Definitely no meat. But I'm fine to eat cheeses, eggs, any dairy product, cakes... I can even eat flowers and hay.”

“Hay we got a plenty,” Applejack said.

Sunset chuckled, looking around at the hay bales the group was sitting on. “So I see. I really need to learn how to make hay bacon...”

“This is amazing and I love every second of it,” Twilight said. “I REALLY need to get a journal of my own so I can ask my counterpart questions about magic.”

Sunset grinned. “I think I can arrange that once this is over and...” A pleasant tingle went down Sunset's spine. She looked up, seeing that Fluttershy had started brushing her mane. “W-What are you...”

Fluttershy blushed. “I can't help it. You look so cute, and I want to do nice things for you like I do for my animals...” she said.

“I-I'm not an animal,” Sunset said.

“I know,” Fluttershy said, kissing her on the forehead. “But you're still cute, and I still want to do nice things for you.”

Sunset squeaked, letting Fluttershy continue to brush her mane.

The other girls were giggling among themselves at this. Sunset blushed brightly, and stammered, “N-Now, just because I kinda like this and am letting Fluttershy do it, it doesn't imply anything! This just feels really good and...”

Sunset lay on her side, blushing as Fluttershy began to gently caress her belly, tracing small circles. Her leg kicked slightly from the tummy rub, the unicorn letting out a squeak of mixed embarrassment and enjoyment.

The girls all giggled again.

“Oh, I'm never gonna live this down...” Sunset groaned.

“How do you think I feel?” Applejack said, holding up Sunset's shirt. “You're gonna be buck naked when the spell wears off.”

“Don't remind me,” Sunset muttered. “This whole situation's just one long awkward moment after another...”

Twilight smiled. “Still, no matter what, we're with you on this. We'll check in a lot on our phones once you get situated here.”

Sunset smiled warmly. “Thanks girls,” she said. “I can always count on you.”

“Although it's really a shame this only lasts for a day,” Rarity said. “I'd love to design a cute little outfit for you like this.”

“Aaaand you ruined it,” Rainbow Dash said, everyone laughing.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
The next day...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Applejack, it can easily be said, was an early riser. Farm work, after all, required a lot of time an effort. Although today was the day that the family took time off, and let themselves sleep in for a few hours.

Despite that, Applejack was still up first, completely rested. She went downstairs to get some cereal and to check on Sunset, who was sleeping on the couch.

She smiled at the little unicorn. She couldn't believe how adorable Sunset's real body was. Although she felt a little sorry for her. Rainbow Dash was gonna tease her for weeks...

In a flash of magical light, the spell ended, Sunset turning back into her human form.

Her completely naked, rather curvy human form.

Applejack blushed brightly. “Oh geez...” she said. She had never realized how BUILT Sunset was. “Um... Sunset?”

Sunset just squirmed sleepily, rolling over onto her back, holding her hands in the hoof-like way Equestrians tended to. “Mmmm, more tummy rubs, please...”

“Sunset, sugar, you're human again,” Applejack said, blushing even brighter. She became acutely aware that Apple Bloom would be back soon. And that Big Macintosh would probably be getting up soon as well.

Sunset just made sleepy noises. "I lika the petz... hmm... Ear scritches, plz..."

“Oh come on...” Applejack said, blushing. “Um...” She paced back and forth, and grimaced, giving up on ideas and just shaking Sunset awake.

“Whu... buh... Applejack?” Sunset grunted.

“Good morning. Sorry about that but I figured you'd like to know that you're human again and naked on my couch,” Applejack said.

Sunset blushed as red as her hair, sleep leaving her immediately. “Clothes.”

“My room, on top of my dresser,” Applejack said.

Sunset ran for the stairs so fast it was as if she teleported. A few minutes later, she came back down, fully dressed and still blushing.

“Um... Thanks for giving me a place to hide out,” Sunset said.

Applejack, blushing herself, nodded. “Y-Yeah, sure... You wanna stay for breakfast?”

Sunset smiled. “That'd be nice,” she said. “I live pretty close to the school, so I don't have to worry about picking up my bike from there...”

Applejack nodded, going to the kitchen. Before she could stop herself, she said, “Didn't know you shaved down there...”

Sunset squeaked, covering her face in embarrassment, vowing to punch Discord in the junk if she ever saw him.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
The Dazzlings' apartment...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Sonata Dusk was sleeping on the couch, having drifted off after a late night gaming session. She was awoken rudely by her phone, playing the song 'Dance Magic.' After getting her bearings and glaring at the phone, she picked it up.

“It better be good, this early on a Sunday...” Sonata said. When she heard the voice on the other end, she eeped in fright. “Y-Yes sir. Sorry sir.”

Aria and Adagio poked their heads out of the bedroom. “Who in blazes is it?” Aria groused.

“Our parole officer,” Sonata said, shushing them. Adagio and Aria immediately shut up, watching the conversation warily.

“Yes sir,” Sonata said. “Sorry, General Sombra, that was my sisters. Yes, they were sleeping in too.” Sonata listened for a moment and nodded. “Right. Reporting on magical happenings... The unicorn was Sunset Shimmer. That's what she really looks like.” Sonata listened and giggled. “Yes sir. She really was cute-looking.” She listened for a few moments. “Right. How it happened. Well, remember when Adagio told you about Discord?”

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next Time: A return to the double polls! You pick who changes and what they change into!

Author's Note

That was honestly fun. Sorry about the lateness!

Anywho. Transformation Error won with 26% of 325 votes.

Next time, we're back with a character poll AND a transformation poll! Click here to pick who changes, and click here to pick what they change into!

Customer 13: The Cutie Mark Crusaders

Discord's New Business
Customer 13: The Cutie Mark Crusaders
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners. If you like what you read, please support me on Patreon or with a Paypal donation!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
Morning...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Rarity calmly left her shop, wanting to eat breakfast out this morning. Perhaps some pancakes. She was doing well on her diet and deserved a treat.

Rainbow Dash finished her morning stretches and flew into town, deciding to see if she could mooch a meal off of any of her friends before heading to Cloudsdale for Wonderbolt training.

Applejack, for her part, had been up for half-an-hour already. Granny Smith had talked her into going into town to have a leisurely breakfast at a restaurant. The concept was just novel enough that Applejack decided to try it. (But only if it was something nice and hearty. Waffles, eggs, hash browns, things like that...)

The three met up in town. “Good morning, girls,” Rarity said, smiling pleasantly.

“Pleasure seenin' y'all,” Applejack said. “Didn't know that any of you were up this early.”

Rarity giggled. “Just because I don't have fields to tend to, doesn't mean I don't get up early to start my work.”

“And I have Wonderbolt training in a couple hours, so I have to be up early,” Rainbow Dash said. “Figured I'd try to mooch a meal off of someone.”

“Well, at least she admits it now,” Applejack said.

Rarity smiled. “Fortunately for her, I'm in a good mood and can afford to pay for everypony's meal. My treat,” she said.

“Sweet!” Rainbow Dash said, grinning.

Applejack frowned. “You sure? I wouldn't want to...”

Rarity interrupted her. “It's perfectly all right, darling,” she said. “My status as a dragon a few days ago made my work more profitable than usual. After all, there are many who'd pay through the nose for dragon-crafted goods in Canterlot.”

Applejack frowned. “But... You were just changed,” she said.

“Indeed,” Rarity said. Rainbow Dash giggled, already guessing where Rarity was going with this.

Applejack frowned. “Isn't that like lying?”

“Certainly not,” Rarity said. “I simply never bothered to correct their assumptions. And those that DID understand that I was simply changed certainly wouldn't care anyway, as they would do the lying to impress their friends.”

Applejack sighed and rolled her eyes. “I don't like it, but business is business, so I won't judge. Let's get some grub.”

The three of them trotted along, chatting amiably. They passed through the center of town.

“Mornin, Applejack!” said Apple Bloom.

“Howdy, little sis!” Applejack said casually.

“Hiya Rarity!” said Sweetie Belle.

“Good day, dear sister,” Rarity said, not turning to look.

“What's up, Rainbow?” Scootaloo asked.

“Nothin' much,” Rainbow Dash said. “Rarity's just treating us to breakfast.”

The three mares walked on. And then they paused, freezing in place for a moment before dashing back over to their sisters.

The three younger mares smirked, posing a little. They'd all grown up, becoming fully adult ponies. Scootaloo's wings had matured, her build as athletic as Rainbow Dash. Sweetie's horn had grown longer, the filly grown up into an exquisitely gorgeous adult with a slim, willowy figure. Apple Bloom, to her amusement, was actually a little bigger than Applejack as an adult, as muscular as Big Macintosh.

“You like?” Sweetie Belle asked, her adult voice smooth and sultry. “We had Discord age us up today. And good golly we're gonna be gorgeous when we hit this age for real.”

Scootaloo flapped her wings, taking off into the air and doing a loop around Rainbow Dash. The younger pegasus giggled. “You were right. My wings were just growing slowly,” she said. “This is so awesome!”

The three older mares were horrified. Rarity, for her part, was able to regain her composure quickly. “Yes, well... I'm glad you're having fun. But... what, exactly, do you intend to do now?” she asked.

Apple Bloom grinned. “Ain't it obvious?” she said. “We're gonna go out and have fun like adults! In MANEHATTAN!”

“Oh buck no,” Rainbow Dash said, shaking her head vigorously. “Your parents will learn necromancy just so they can keep killing me if I let that happen.”

“Any stallion looks at you funny I'mma hog-tie them to a movin' train,” Applejack growled.

Sweetie Belle blushed. Because she had listened to Rarity's stories about Canterlot, she knew were Rainbow Dash and Applejack's minds went. “Not THAT kind of adult fun!” she protested.

“I mean like going into clubs where kids wouldn't be allowed normally!” Scootaloo said.

“Plus, there's that play in Manehattan, Granite Wasps? No kids allowed in that one, and I've been dying to know what it's like!” Apple Bloom said excitedly.

“I am NOT letting you go to the big city by yourselves!” Rarity said.

“Granite Wasps... Criminy, that thing gave MAUD nightmares! It was so weird, seeing her actually emote...” Rainbow Dash said.

“It took three weeks of Princess Luna fightin' off the monster from that play before Maud could sleep normal-like again!” Applejack said.

“We can handle it!” Scootaloo said. “We're older now!”

“You LOOK older,” Rarity said. “That doesn't mean you ARE older.”

The Crusaders started to protest again, but suddenly froze in place. The older sisters stared at each other worriedly, wondering what happened. They got their answer when Discord poofed into existence in front of them.

“My apologies for the time stop, but I wanted to try and convince you to let them go,” Discord said.

“Absolutely not!” Rarity said firmly, stomping. “They're too young to go wandering Manehattan on their own!”

Rainbow Dash and Applejack nodded in agreement.

“My dear girls, whoever said they'd be alone?” Discord said, smirking.

That gave the three older mares pause. “...You're gonna follow them?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“I'm chaotic, not callous,” Discord said, folding his arms. After a moment, he amended, “Well, not callous anymore. I figured that this would be a good opportunity for them to learn to appreciate their youth while they have it. Growing up too quickly does nopony any good. Oh, I'll protect them from the more dangerous things. But I'll let them experience enough to let them realize that adulthood isn't everything it's cracked up to be, that they should just enjoy being kids while they can. Cross my heart, hope to fly, yadda yadda, Pinkie Pie memes.”

Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack traded worried looks, muttering quietly to each other. Finally, Applejack looked up and spoke for all of them. “Just keep them safe,” she said.

Discord nodded, snapping his fingers and disappearing the time stop ending. The Crusaders were continuing their protests when Rarity held up a hoof to stop them. “We've thought it over, and we've decided to let you go.”

“Really!?” Sweetie Belle said, hugging her sister tightly. “Thank you!”

Applejack nodded. “But you leave right after y'all see that play. Y'hear?”

Apple Bloom grinned. “Gives us plenty of time,” she said. “We're going to the late showing.”

“And no complaining when you get nightmares,” Rainbow Dash said.

Scootaloo scoffed. “Cmon,” she said. “Even before we got aged up, we aren't little kids anymore.”

The older sisters just grunted. Please let them be safe, they prayed, thinking the same thought all at once.

Apple Bloom giggled happily as they gathered their saved-up funds. “We're really gonna go on a trip to Manehattan! By ourselves!” the farmpony said.

“I know, right? All the clubs, the boutiques,” Sweetie Belle said, fanning herself. “So awesome!”

“I knew saving up our allowances would pay off!” Scootaloo said. “I told you! I told you waiting would be worth it!”

Apple Bloom nodded. “Credit where it's due, you were right. Instead of just trottin' around Ponyville in whatever we transformed into, we're going to Manehattan! To see a Bridleway show that's just for adults!”

The three went to the train station and bought their tickets, chatting excitedly as they traveled. Neither of them noticed the gray pony with the odd yellow eyes following them wherever they went. Nor did anypony else for that matter. Which was how he wanted it for now.

As the Cutie Mark Crusaders pulled into Manehattan, a few hours later, they stared in awe. So many buildings, reaching high into the sky...

“This is so AWESOME!” Scootaloo declared as she flew out of the train, Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom following her. “Where do you wanna go first?”

“Can we go to Carousel Manehattan?” Sweetie Belle asked.

Apple Bloom grimaced. “Seriously? You want to go to your sister's store?”

Sweetie giggled. “I heard that her assistant there, Plaid Stripes, had some weird dress ideas. She wouldn't talk about it, of course. Something about them being 'barely fashion.' But I was curious.”

Scootaloo frowned. “I dunno,” she said.

Sweetie Belle grinned. “One of her first ideas involved a dress made of spoons,” she said.

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom blinked, and giggled. “Oh, I gotta see this,” Scootaloo said.

Sweetie Belle giggled. “C'mon,” she said. “Rarity took me there one time, so I know how to get there from here.”

The three lovely young mares trotted along, chatting casually. As they made their way towards the store, oblivious to their surroundings, a stallion in a trenchcoat started following them. A cruel smirk was on his face as he looked them over, especially their rumps. The unicorn pulled out a bottle and trio of rags from his coat, pouring a liquid onto the rags...

...and then Discord appeared out of an alley, grabbing him. “Now, I said that I'd let them experience SOME bad things, but you're a little more than I'm willing to have them deal with.”

“Whu!?” the would-be kidnapper stammered.

Discord grinned, showing far too many teeth. “Hi. I'm the Lord of Chaos. Let's you and me talk on the veranda,” he said, dragging the hapless stallion into the darkness of the alley.

The Crusaders arrived at the store a few minutes later. It wasn't as flamboyant as Rarity's Ponyville store, but it did have its elegance.

A short, but lanky pony with braces came up to them. “Heya. Welcome to the Manehattan branch of the Carousel Boutique, where everything is chiq, unique, and magnet feet.”

“Mangifique,” corrected a white Earth pony behind the counter. “Please feel free to look around! I'm Coco Pommel, and this is my assistant, Plaid Stripes!”

“A pleasure,” Plaid said, grinning.

“Likewise,” Sweetie Belle said. Turning to the girls, she said, “I'm actually going to buy a dress.”

Scootaloo frowned. “It won't fit you in a day,” she said.

“I know, I know,” Sweetie Belle said. “But Rarity gets this angry twitch in her eye when nopony buys anything. I don't wanna do that to them,” she said. She looked around, and said, “Plus, I really like some of the things here.”

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Whatever...” she said.

Apple Bloom grinned. “Just be sure to save enough money for the show tonight.”

Sweetie Belle smiled, turning back to Plaid Stripes. Coco was busy with another customer. “So,” Sweetie Belle said. “I heard a rumor that you once made a dress out of spoons?”

Plaid grinned. “Yeah. Cutlery Chiq,” she said. “I still think it can work, but Boss Rarity nixed it. She lets me work on improving it, but I can't sell it yet.” She motioned for the three to follow, taking them to a back room in the otherwise elegant shop.

Sweetie Belle giggled at the mess of cloth and thread, so very similar to Rarity's 'inspiration room.' On a ponyquin in the corner was a dress made of various shaped spoons. Plaid smiled proudly at it.

Apple Bloom looked thoughtful. “Huh... That's... actually not that bad,” she said honestly.

Plaid beamed. “Thanks! I'm still getting the hang of combining cloth and the spoons, but I'm really makin' progress,” she said.

A door opened in the back of the storeroom. A large, white Earth pony with a purple beard came out. “Plaid, I am wondering what you and Miss Pommel are...” the stallion said. He took one look at Sweetie Belle, shrieked, and ran away.

“...The heck was that about?” Scootaloo said.

Plaid smirked. “Yeah, Dad blackmailed Boss Rarity into hiring me. Threatened to hike up her rent to an unreasonable level,” she said. “I'm lucky she decided to make me a student instead of just firing me.”

Sweetie Belle blinked. “WHAT?! That's not right!” she said.

“Yeah! You can't just bully somepony into hiring somepony!” Scootaloo said, angry.

Plaid giggled. “Don't worry. Once everything was settled and her store was open, she called in a couple friends of hers. Maybe you've heard of them. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna?”

The Crusaders all traded amused grins at that.

Plaid looked back at the door. “The funny thing? The one he was most terrified of after that particular conversation was Boss Rarity herself. Now he has a panic attack every time he sees a unicorn with a white coat.”

Scootaloo nodded in approval. “Good,” she said.

“Um...” Sweetie Belle said, gesturing to Plaid.

“What? He's a jerk, right?” the orange pegasus said, nodding at Plaid.

“Yeah, pretty much,” Plaid agreed, rubbing her snout. “He's a good Dad, he's just a jerk to everyone else.”

The Crusaders chuckled at that, Sweetie Belle going back to shopping. After a few minutes of this, an impatient Scootaloo said, “C'mon!!! We got a lot to get done before we go to the show tonight!”

Coco smiled at the Crusaders. “Oh? What are you seeing?” she asked.

“Granite Wasps!” Apple Bloom said, grinning.

Plaid Stripes and Coco Pommel blinked. “...There are easier ways to get Princess Luna to visit you,” Plaid said.

Scootaloo scowled. “Oh, come on! It's just a play! It can't be that bad!”

“I head that Princess Luna visited the director and told him to greatly amp down the scary, as she was starting to get overworked from all the nightmares,” Coco said.

“I also heard that he keeps a recording of the conversation and listens to it over and over again, seeing it as the ultimate validation of his play's success,” Plaid added.

The Crusaders traded uneasy looks. Scootaloo, after a moment, regained her confidence. “We're tough. We can handle it.”

“Uh huh,” Plaid said. She's going to be sobbing into her teddy bear tonight, she thought.

After a few more minutes of shopping, Sweetie Belle bought a trio of colorful, elegant scarves for the three of them. Bidding Plaid and Coco farewell, the trio went out for the next leg of their journey. Although Coco couldn't help but think that the unicorn looked like an older version of Rarity's sister...

Scootaloo bought a map from a street vendor. “Let's see... Where to next?”

Apple Bloom smiled. “I was wonderin' if they had a farmer's market?” she said.

Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle looked over the map. “Doesn't look like it,” Scootaloo said, frowning.

“Oh...” Apple Bloom said. “Well, maybe a museum?”

“Plenty of those, but they're all several miles away,” Sweetie Belle said, frowning at the map, starting to see a flaw in their plan.

“Forget that! I wanna see Manehattan Stadium! The Wonderbolts did a show there recently, and I'd love to see where they showed off how awesome they are!” Scootaloo declared.

“...That's even father out of the way than the museums,” Sweetie Belle said.

Scootaloo's jaw dropped. “What?!”

Sweetie Belle nodded. “Here, lemme show you,” she said. “Twilight taught Rarity a spell that allows her to estimate walking times. I was in the room when Rarity learned it, so I sorta know how to cast it as well.” Her horn glowed. With her aged up body, casting the spell was easier. It traced a line from where the Crusaders were on the map, to the Stadium on the outskirts of the city, back to the theater where the show they wanted to see was playing. “Yeah. If we went to the Stadium by walking, and tried to get back to Bridleway to see Granite Wasps, we wouldn't get back in time.”

“Oh come on!” Scootaloo said, frustrated.

Apple Bloom frowned. “I don't think we thought this through... To see everything we wanted, we'd have to stay more than just a day. We'd turn back into kids by tomorrow and...” Another thought occurred to her, a pained look coming to her face. “And our sisters would get in trouble for letting us come here alone.”

Scootaloo blinked, frowning. “...I don't want to get Rainbow Dash in trouble,” she said.

“Maybe we should just go back,” Sweetie Belle said sadly.

Discord frowned. While this attack of conscience was a good thing, he did want them to have SOME fun while here. Time for a little direct intervention... he thought, snapping his fingers and manifesting a disguise.

“Excuse me ladies!” said a voice from nearby. The Crusaders turned, spotting a grayish brown unicorn standing there, his Cutie Mark a portal, his mane and tail dark brown. “Sounds like you're having a bit of scheduling trouble!”

Sweetie Belle nodded. “We have only a day to be here,” she said. “We wanted to see Granite Wasps, but we don't have much time to do anything else...”

“Yeah...” Apple Bloom said. “We didn't think how big a city could be.”

“You're in luck!” the stallion said. “My name is Open Door, and I'm the best tour guide in the city! I know every shortcut and have mastered the art of transportational portals to get through even the toughest traffic jams!”

The Crusaders traded hopeful looks. “...You can get us to everywhere we want to go?”

“Absolutely guaranteed or your money back!” Open Door said.

The Crusaders grinned. “Well...” Sweetie Belle said. “Seeing the Manehattan stadium does sound interesting...”

Open Door hitched himself up to his cart. “Hop in!” he said. “I'll get you there in record time! Payment due only when my services aren't needed anymore!”

The Crusaders piled in. Open Door's horn flared, creating a portal in space. He trotted through it... reappearing in the Stadium's parking lot.

“Whoa, you weren't kidding!” Scootaloo said, looking around excitedly.

“C'mon, let's go! I can see where we can pay to get in!” Apple Bloom said, she and Scootaloo running towards the booth.

Sweetie Belle hesitated. “...That was chaos magic you used,” the unicorn said softly. “I can tell.”

Open Door began sweating. “What. You think that ugly noodle who sold everypony out to Tirek is the only one who can use it?”

Sweetie Belle smiled. “You've been shadowing us since we got here, haven't you?” she asked.

Open Door sighed, changing his head back to normal. In his real voice, Discord said, “I have my reasons. Your sisters wouldn't let you come here unless I went as a chaperone.”

Sweetie Belle hugged him. “Thank you, Discord,” she said, running off to join the others.

Discord blushed, and turned back into Open Door. “I really have gone soft,” he muttered, amused. He vanished into the shadows, watching over the girls as they traveled through the Stadium, admiring the various pictures of past games played there. They even got a chance to play games, trying out a pitching booth.

Apple Bloom did the best. “HA!” she said, flexing.

Scootaloo growled. “I want a rematch,” she muttered.

“Your noodle limbs can't match my farmer's power!” Apple Bloom crowed.

“Sweet Luna's tail it's Applejack and Rainbow all over again,” Sweetie Belle said, giggling. “Fight later! We still got stuff to see and the best tour guide in the world to get us there!”

“I guess...” Scootaloo muttered. “But I still want my rematch when we're kids again.”

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle giggled, heading back to Open Door, who was waiting for them patiently. The quartet went on a long, winding tour of the city, taking in museums, stores, and even a few live musical performances. And throughout it all, Discord privately watched the trio, smiling at them and discreetly directing more troublesome things away from them.

He truly adored those three little troublemakers.

As the evening approached, Open Door smiled. “Getting close to showtime,” he said. “You should probably get your tickets soon, the lines will be pretty long.”

“Yeah, sure,” Apple Bloom said. “But... actually, I have an idea.”

“What's that?” Scootaloo asked.

“Open, could you get the tickets? We want to go to a club before the show, and maybe spend a couple hours there,” Apple Bloom said. “We'll pay you extra.”

Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo smiled at Open hopefully. Open fidgeted, and then sighed. “Yeah, sure... Actually, there's a place I can recommend. DJ-P0N3 usually plays there, although she's not here tonight.”

One less pony to blow our cover, Sweetie Belle thought privately. “Thanks, Open!” she said.

Open sighed, taking them to the club. “Get in line,” he said. “You're all rather pretty, so they might let you in.”

Apple Bloom blinked. “Why wouldn't they let us in?”

Open Door shrugged. “Could be any reason,” he said. “They don't like how you're behaving, the bouncer thinks you're dressed inappropriately for the club, the bouncer thinks you're too young to be in the club...”

“Good thing that doesn't apply to us!” Apple Bloom said quickly, grinning nervously. Scootaloo facehooved.

“Uh huh,” Open Door said, amused. “Anyway, arguing with the bouncer's decisions will definitely get you tossed out before you get in. So be careful. I kinda like you girls.”

Sweetie Belle smiled. “We'll be all right,” she said, giving Open Door the money for the tickets. They went into the back of the line, Open Door opening another portal and heading to the ticket booth. Not wanting to waste time, he teleported in front of the pony coming up to the ticket booth and altered their perceptions, making it seem he had been there the whole time.

“Three for the late show of Granite Wasps, please,” Open Door said, paying for the tickets and teleporting back to the club in his real body once he had them. Discord watched, invisible, as the three Crusaders made their way up to the bouncers, a griffon the size of Big Macintosh and a fierce-looking changeling with an intimidating dark red color-scheme.

The two bouncers looked over the nervously smiling Crusaders, chatting briefly among themselves. Finally, the griffon shrugged. “Pretty enough, I suppose. Have fun,” he said, opening the door for them. Cheering, the three mares went inside. Discord vanished into the shadows, following them.

Once inside, the three of them stared in awe. The place was packed, ponies pressed up against each other as they made their way around. Smoke from ponies enjoying certain combinations of herbs filled the air, making Scootaloo cough. On the dance floor, ponies were bumping and grinding against each other to the beat of the music.

Sweetie Belle blushed at the sight of that, uncomfortable.

Apple Bloom, however, was undaunted. “Cmon!” she said. “I see the bar. Let's get some drinks!”

Scootaloo coughed again, landing. “Yeah, that'd be good. Air in here is really dry,” she said.

The three young ponies made their way to the bar, briefly separating as other ponies jostled by them rudely. They made their way to the bar. The bartender, a burly Earth pony with a white coat, looked them over suspiciously, taking in their expressions and the way they held themselves. “What'll it be, ladies?” he said.

Apple Bloom found a menu, and looked over it with the others. “Well...” Apple Bloom said after a moment. “We're in Manehattan, might as well try a Manehattan!”

Scootaloo grinned. “I want to have a margarita!”

“A martini for me please?” Sweetie Belle asked, smiling cutely.

The bartender nodded. “ID please,” he said.

The Crusaders blinked. “Uh...” Sweetie Belle said.

“No one under a certain age gets booze,” the bartender said. “It's not legal to serve it to kids. You want me to make you those drinks, you show me ID that proves you're the right age.”

The Crusaders traded nervous glances. “Uh... you see...” Scootaloo said, stammering.

Apple Bloom, giving up, let her head droop to the bar. “Forget it. You got anything like an apple cider or something?”

The bartender smiled. “That I can do,” he said. “Same for each of you?”

Sweetie Belle just nodded. “Yeah,” Scootaloo said dejectedly.

The bartender went to a nearby minifridge and pulled out a jug. “Fresh from Sweet Apple Acres farms in Ponyville,” the bartender said. “Goes great in some of our harder drinks, but oh my is it good on its own.”

Apple Bloom allowed herself a smirk, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo giggling. The bartender poured their drinks, the Crusaders paid for them, and they sat back and watched everyone.

“This...” Scootaloo said, coughing again, “isn't what I expected.”

“Feels like a weaker version of a Pinkie Pie party,” Apple Bloom said.

“Pinkie Pie parties are actually fun...” Scootaloo muttered. “This music's dull compared to what Vinyl puts out, and everypony's just talking or dancing...”

Sweetie Belle shook her head, sipping her drink. Another thing not working out as planned.

“Well well!” said a nearby voice. The Crusaders turned to see a trio of stallions heading towards them. “What have we here? Some fine, lovely ladies all alone?”

“And content to be alone,” Scootaloo said. “Buzz off.”

The lead stallion, a pegasus with a dark coat and darker red mane, clad in a bright red jacket, smirked. “Now, don't be like that?” he said, putting a foreleg around Scootaloo's shoulders. “I bet once we get to know each other, we'll be the best of friends.”

The other two stallions, one a large, brutish-looking unicorn with a small horn and a dark orange coat, the other a dark magenta Earth pony with a slim black mustache, came up to Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom respectively.

Sweetie Belle squirmed uncomfortably as the unicorn stallion grinned dopeily at her. “Yer pretty,” he said. “I like pretty, shiny things... Want to be mine?”

“Not really.” Sweetie Belle said, grimacing.

Meanwhile, Apple Bloom was dealing with her own problems. “Come now, my dear,” the slick magenta stallion said. “No need to fear. We're just paying you compliments.”

“You're being real creeps about it,” Apple Bloom said, trying to ignore her suitor. Tuning out the stallion, she turned to check on the others.

She turned just in time to see the red pegasus slip a small packet of white powder out of his jacket sleeve and dump it into Scootaloo's cider, the pegasus's attention turned away from it.

“Hey Scoots? Loverboy just put something in your drink,” the farmer said.

The red pegasus blinked, quickly pulling the packet back into his sleeve. “W-What? I'd never do something like that!”

Scootaloo snarled at him. “I believe her more than I believe you!” she snapped.

A bouncer came over to check the commotion, a large, burly unicorn. “Something the matter?” she asked.

“I was simply paying fine compliments to these fine young ladies, me and my friends...” the red pegasus trailed off, noticing that his friends had made themselves scares. He scowled, and continued. “...and they just started accusing me of things!”

“He put a packet of something in Scootaloo's drink! I saw it!” Apple Bloom insisted.

The bouncer glared at the glass a moment, and whistled for the bartender. “Get the testing kit,” she said. The bartender, understanding, nodding. He pulled out a box filled with dark red sticks.

“What are those?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“They change colors if a certain drug is present in a drink,” the bouncer said. The red pegasus tried to flee, but was held fast in her magical field. “Once it was invented, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna ordered all restaurants that serve drinks to have them.”

The bartender dipped one of the sticks into the drink. The submerged part turned bright blue.

The red pegasus grinned nervously. “Eheheh...” he said, the bouncer and bartender glaring at him.

“We'll hold him for the police,” the bartender said, pouring Scootaloo a new drink and setting the tainted one aside. “You'll have to give a statement.”

“What would that have done to her if she drank it?” Sweetie Belle asked.

The bouncer explained. The Crusaders immediately regretted hearing it.

From the shadows, Discord nodded, satisfied. He would have intervened himself, but thankfully for the sake of the red pegasus, the bouncer was quick on the draw. The girls were fine for now.

An hour later, the girls had finished giving their statement. “Okay, thank you,” the officer, Copper Top, said. She smiled warmly at them. “You girls got a place to stay for the night?”

“We... we were gonna take the train back to Ponyville after seeing the late showing of Granite Wasps,” Apple Bloom said.

“Hnh. Good show,” Copper Top said. “Anyway. Please write your addresses down. I think we can get this scum to confess, but in case we can't we'll want to be able to contact you for trial.”

The girls nodded, signing the form Copper Top gave them. The red pegasus and his friends (the latter two having been found hiding in the bathroom) were dragged off, leaving three depressed Crusaders.

“Well, this has sucked,” Scootaloo muttered. “I am most definitely peeved.”

“Let's just go...” Sweetie Belle said. “We can get to the theater early and get good seats.”

Apple Bloom nodded. “Sounds like a plan,” she said.

They found Open Door waiting outside. “Got your tickets!” he said, giving them to the Crusaders. “Didja have fun?”

“No,” Sweetie Belle said. “Some jerk tried to drug Scootaloo...”

Open Door flinched. “Oooh. Well, that's the risk with clubs like this. I saw cops, so I guess it ended well though...”

Scootaloo nodded. “Yeah, yeah... Thanks for getting the tickets. Let's just go to the theater...”

Open Door nodded, taking them to the theater. He guided them to the theater and let them out. “Wanna join us, Discord?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“Huh?” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo asked.

Open Door blinked, and chuckled, turning into Discord.

“Why are you even here?!” Scootaloo said, annoyed.

“Keeping an eye on you for your sisters,” Discord said. “They wouldn't let you come unless I agreed to act as your bodyguard. There's a LOT I had to direct away from you.”

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
In an alley...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

In an alley, a terrified stallion in a trenchcoat lay curled up in a fetal position. “Eyes... eyes... eyes... eyes... eyes... eyes...” he chanted in a low, terrified voice.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Bridleway...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo traded worried looks. Sweetie Belle smiled. “It's okay. I get why they're doing it. And I'm glad you're here. I was kinda worried about us going out on our own...”

Discord blushed. “I will NEVER get used to hearing ponies say that and mean it...” he said quietly.

Apple Bloom thought for a moment. “Well... If it keeps Applejack from worryin' too hard, I guess that's okay.”

Scootaloo grumped. “Fine, fine fine fine,” he said. “Still, you're here. Might as well see the show with us.”

“I don't have a ticket, though,” Discord said.

The aged-up fillies just stared at him, raising an eyebrow.

Discord snickered. “Just checking to make sure you wouldn't be too bothered by me sneaking in with you.”

Sweetie Belle grinned, hugging the draconequus again. “C'mon! We've been waiting for this all day!” The three fillies went inside, Discord shrinking down and hiding in Sweetie Belle's mane.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Later...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“It was just a faceless pony in a suit! How was it so scary!?” Scootaloo whimpered.

“It was just magical illusions... It was just magical illusions... It was just magical illusions...” Apple Bloom said over and over, trying to reassure herself.

“Dark... so dark... tentacles... so impertinent...” Sweetie Belle said, curled up and shivering.

Discord, a nostalgic look on his face, sauntered out of the theater, dragging the three paralyzed with fear aged-up fillies with him. “WONDERFUL performance,” he said. “Well done indeed. Especially when the tentacles went out over the audience.”

“This was the stupidest thing we've ever done,” Apple Bloom said.

“Can we go home now?” Sweetie Belle whimpered.

Discord looked over the three of them and nodded. “Yeah, I think you've had enough of pretending you're all grown up.” He snapped his fingers, the four of them teleporting home.

Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and Applejack were waiting for them in the train station when they reappeared. Almost immediately, the three aged-up fillies glomped their older sisters.

“Enjoyed the show, I take it?” Rarity teased gently.

“SCAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRYYYYYY!!!!” the Crusaders wailed.

“Let's get 'em home,” Rainbow Dash said. “I convinced Scoots' parents that she was having a sleepover at the clubhouse.”

Applejack stroked Apple Bloom's mane. “Yeah, I think separating them would be bad for now,” she said. “We'll let 'em sleep at the farm tonight.”

“I'm never gonna sleep again!” Sweetie Belle wailed.

Rarity gently hugged her sister. “Sssh,” she said. “Just relax. You're home now. Sister won't let anything hurt you.”

“Thanks for watching out for them,” Applejack said to Discord. “Everything go okay?”

“Minor incidents,” Discord said. “Nothing I couldn't handle.”

The three older mares gave him grateful looks as they took their frightened older sisters home. Discord, for his part, just sighed, shaking his head at the Crusaders.

“Sometimes, you just need to be allowed to make mistakes,” he said. “Good thing they have such fine sisters.” He snapped his fingers and vanished in a pop.

TO BE CONTINUED...
Next time: Someone becomes a tatzlpony!

Author's Note

Crusaders take Manehattan! Whoo!

The Cutie Mark Crusaders won the character pole with 16% of 389 votes, and Age Manipulation won by 21% of 390 votes!

Next time, we have someone who's definitely going to become a tatzlpony! Pick who changes here!

Opening Day

Discord's New Business
by Jonathan “KnightMysterio” Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Morning in Ponyville shimmers. And most of the time, it even shines. And when you wake up in a place like Ponyville, you know for absolute certain that everything's going to be fine.

“TWILIGHT! Wake up! Wake up wake up wake up!”

And then you step out your front door and immediately realize you should have just stayed in bed.

“Ngh... What is it, Spike? It's...” Twilight yawned, blearily looking over at the clock. A scowl came to her face. “Spike... The only ponies up at this hour are the Cakes. Do I look like either of the Cakes?”

Spike, standing in the doorway of his big sister's bedroom, couldn't resist. “Well, you have put on a little weight lately.”

Twilight's glare could have melted titanium.

Spike giggled. “But seriously, this is kinda-sorta important,” he said.

“World-ending important?” Twilight said. “Because if it isn't, I'm going back to sleep. I'm FINALLY caught up on my research and...”

“Discord's starting a business,” Spike said.

Twilight's words died in her throat. “I... what?”

Spike nodded. “I woke up to use the bathroom and couldn't get back to sleep. So I decided to do some errands, collect some herbs and berries near the edge of the Everfree for your experiments. And before you say anything, I stayed in full view of the watchtowers, so I was fine,” he said.

Twilight nodded. The watchtowers kept an eye on the Everfree Forest, going up shortly after Zecora had been properly introduced to the town, both to watch for monsters and to watch anyone going in and out, in case they needed protection.

“I was heading back to the castle,” Spike continued, “when I saw Discord setting up a stand in the marketplace.”

“...Did you get a look at what he was selling?” Twilight asked, becoming worried.

Spike shook his head. “No. But, Twilight, he's got a permit. He has it framed, looks like he's going to hang it on his stand once he's completed.”

Twilight's eye twitched. “A permit. As in he's doing this completely legally. As in he somehow managed the patience to actually sit through doing all the necessary paperwork.”

Spike nodded. “Uh huh...”

Twilight covered her head with her pillow and let out a frustrated groan. She yawned, and said, “Okay, get the girls. It may be nothing, but... I want to be sure. I'll wake up Starlight Glimmer.”

Some quick sent off letters and a sleepy reformed cult leader prodded awake later, and eight occasional heroes were gathered in front of the most bizarre creature in Equestria as he set up a rather simplistic stand.

“Ow!” he cursed as he accidentally hit the thumb of his lion paw. Shaking his hand in annoyance, he noticed the girls for the first time and smiled. “Oh! Hello there, ladies and kid appeal character. Come to wish me luck on my latest business venture?”

The gathered ponies and dragon traded worried looks. “We're just... wondering what your 'business venture' is,” Twilight asked.

Discord smiled. “I'm glad you asked!” he said. He held up a sign, drawn in what looked like crayon. “I'm pleased to welcome you to the grand opening of Discord's Temporary Species Swap Services!”

Twilight summed up everypony's feelings when she said, “...What?”

Discord resumed setting up his stand. “Celestia was being a pill about me finding something constructive to do with my time. She suggested that I get a job, and while normally I would balk at the idea of something as structured and orderly as WORK, ick, I got the idea of using my chaos powers as part of my job! Took me a bit to figure out something, and after that I knew I'd have to come up with RULES for it, and yes, it was physically painful for me to do so...”

Rainbow Dash growled impatiently. “Get to the point!”

Discord flicked her nose. “I'm getting there. Hold your water,” he said, snapping his fingers. A bucket of water appeared out of nowhere and dumped on Rainbow Dash's head. Pinkie Pie giggled as Rainbow Dash fumed.

“Anyway,” Discord continued. “The more I thought about my idea, the more I wanted to see it come to fruition. So I went through all the paperwork, agreed to all the Mayor's rules (which includes setting up my stand without breaking physics to do so), got all the responsibility waivers printed, and got my license. I am now fully prepared to offer anypony a temporary, one-day change of species and/or tribe!”

“I'm not sure what you mean...” Fluttershy said softly.

“Well... Oh this is taking forever...” Discord muttered. He looked from side to side briefly and snapped his fingers, his stand assembling itself. “My dear Fluttershy. Didn't you tell me once that you'd like to be a tree? Well, now you can actually be one! For twenty four hours, at which time you will be automatically changed back and teleported to relative safety.”

“Teleported back?” Applejack asked.

“Let's say Pinkie Pie here decided she wanted to become a pegasus for the day,” Discord said, Pinkie Pie looking thoughtful at the idea. “It'd be dangerous if her time as a pegasus ran out while she was still in the air, correct?”

“Yes...” Twilight said cautiously.

Discord grinned. “Well, thanks to the way I've structured the transformation spell, once her twenty-four hours is up, she'll be teleported right back to the nearest stable ground without incident.”

Starlight still looked doubtful. “What about basic abilities? You can't learn magic in a day...”

“You can, Timebreaker,” Discord countered, Starlight wincing. “Pretty sure Pwincess Fwiendship here can too.”

“Starlight and I have a natural affinity for unicorn magic,” Twilight protested. “And even then, we're talking something basic, like telekinesis. Once an infant's surges pass, it takes them a while to be able to manifest it properly again.”

Discord waved dismissively. “I make sure to include all basic knowledge of abilities for whatever you turn into,” he said. “Flying, cloudwaking, basic telekinesis, all of that.”

Twilight frowned, huddling Spike and the others together and discussing things quickly while Discord popped a featherduster into existence, dusting off his stand. After a moment, Twilight turned back around. “What sort of transformations are you offering?” she asked.

“Earth pony, pegasus, unicorn, alicorn...” Discord started.

“ALICORN!??” Twilight shrieked.

“You can do that?” Starlight asked quietly.

“Let me finish,” Discord snapped.

“BUT...!” Twilight stammered.

“Let's hear him out,” Fluttershy said quietly.

Twilight sputtered a moment, but went silent.

“Thank you, my dear Fluttershy,” Discord said, smiling warmly at her. Fluttershy smiled back. Discord coughed, and then continued. “Anyway. The basic options are Earth pony, pegasus, unicorn, alicorn, zebra, donkey, griffon, minotaur, old-type changeling, new-type changeling, changeling royalty, dragon, and draconequus. Alicorn, changeling royal, draconequus, and dragon, of course, will be the most expensive, and I do take special requests.”

Twilight still looked uncomfortable. “JUST twenty-four hours, right?” she asked.

“Twenty-four hours, and the spell ends automatically,” Discord said, leaning up against his stand.

“That's... that's okay, I guess... Can't really cause too much damage in a day...” Twilight said.

It took all of Discord's willpower not to giggle wickedly.

“I don't know, girls,” Pinkie Pie said. “It sounds like it could be fun! And it's just for a day, right?”

Discord nodded. “And, in the spirit of friendship (or the close approximation of it that most of you have with me), I'm prepared to offer each of you your first transformation for free.”

That caught everyone off-guard, Discord relishing the expressions on their faces. “S-Seriously?” Spike asked.

Discord nodded. “All eight of you get to turn into whatever you want for a day, completely for free,” he said.

“We... We'll think about it,” Rarity said after a moment. Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash, normally the most impulsive, agreed as well.

Discord nodded. “Fair enough,” he said. “Ah, while you're here, Twilight, would you review the waiver forms, please? I need to make sure that there's no legal repercussions that can come back to me on this.”

“...So you ARE up to something,” Twilight said, scowling.

“Of course I am,” Discord said, smirking and handing over one of the waiver forms. “Same thing I'm always up to – creating chaos. This time, however, I'm doing it LEGALLY. I'm offering a service in an untapped market. All I'm doing is making the transformations possible. What anypony does with it afterwards is their business.”

Twilight frowned, looking over the paper. She mumbled her way through the legalese, reading the important part aloud. “This document, legally notarized, hereby states that I, the undersigned, agree that Discord, the very handsome Lord of Chaos is not responsible for any damage, physical, mental, or emotional, done to myself or any others. Discord simply provided the transformation, I am responsible for what I did with it.”

“Ah, legal booty covering,” Discord said, relaxing against his stand. “One of the few inventions of Order that I find entertaining.”

“Girls...” Twilight said. “We can't do anything about this. He's got all his legal bases covered. And technically, he's right.”

“He's right,” said Twilight's voice from the recording device Discord made. “Also, he's very handsome.”

Twilight's horn flared, crushing the recording device. Discord cackled. Twilight shook her head, and said, “The best we can do is try and contain any collateral damage from the transformations.”

Rainbow Dash scowled. “So what, we're just gonna let this go?” she said, gesturing to him.

“He is offering us a free use of his service,” Rarity said, looking thoughtful. Spike was also considering his options.

Rainbow Dash grumbled. “Fine, finefinefine,” she said. “But I'm keeping an eye on you!” She flew off in a streak of color, the others filing away, thoughtful looks on their faces.

Except for Fluttershy.

Inwardly, Discord was pleased that she'd come to him first. Once the others were out of listening range, he said, “So, my dear. Shall I take this to accept that you're interested in my services?”

Fluttershy nodded. “I've always wanted to be a tree,” she said softly. “So tall, and strong...”

Discord nodded, hugging her. “For you, my dear, anything.” He snapped his fingers, and Fluttershy vanished.

When she reappeared, she was now in the Everfree forest, a tall, mighty oak tree. Fluttershy squeed internally.

Eee! I'm finally a tree! she thought happily. Hello, fellow trees! Yay!

No response from the surrounding foliage. Well, that's okay. I'm just so excited! She watched as the sun moved across the sky. She listened to the sounds of the forest. She tried to look around, but found herself unable to move her gaze from straight ahead. She tried to look down to see her roots, but was unable to move.

Well, I can't move, but maybe I'll see some lovely animals! Some birds, some bunnies, and... she trailed off. Something will happen, I know it!

This was her dream come true. She was a tree! She was a part of nature, tall and strong! She cleaned the air, producing oxygen and taking in carbon dioxide.

She felt something nuzzle up against her underside. Oooh! A critter's nuzzling up against me! She squeed again. I wonder what it is! Is it a bunny? A deer? A...

She felt something warm and wet pouring against her. O-oh. The critter just wanted to... Well, that's okay. It's a part of nature. Yay...

Hours passed. The wind blew through Fluttershy's branches. Nothing happened.

I wonder how my animals are doing... she thought. I didn't really think about this. I should have told them what I was doing. Oh Fluttershy, how could you be so impulsive? I... No. Angel's good at coordinating everyone. They'll be fine.

More time passed. A bird flew by. Nothing of interest happened.

...Wow I'm bored, she thought. She tried to pass the time by thinking about what she knew about trees. It lasted about an hour before she ran out of information.

Where are all the critters? she thought. ...No, it wouldn't matter, because I can't hold them, or cuddle them... I can't even look down to see them! I just...

She gave up. Discord? This isn't what I expected it to be... Can I change back now?

The draconequus appeared out of nowhere, wrapping around her. “I figured this would happen,” he said, smiling sadly. “Although to your credit, you lasted longer than I thought you would.” He snapped his fingers, the two of them returning to the stand, Fluttershy turning back into a pegasus.

Fluttershy stretched, flapping her wings and flexing her body, trying to loosen up after her extended paralysis.

Discord leaned up against his stand. Ponies were milling about, going about their business. As Fluttershy looked around, she saw that Discord had some other customers in the meantime. Zecora was apparently a pegasus zebra now, and from the way she was laughing, was clearly enjoying her new gift of flight. Bon Bon was a changeling, one of Thorax's from the look of the color scheme, and showing off her transformation ability to a giggling, happy Lyra. Royal Pin had become an Earth pony, and was talking animatedly with an amused Big Macintosh.

Fluttershy smiled. She was glad Discord was getting customers.

“As you weren't satisfied,” Discord said, “I'm willing to give you another freebie for a full twenty-four hours. What would you like to become for the day?”

Fluttershy smiled, sitting down to think...

TO BE CONTINUED
Vote for what happens next in the poll!

Author's Note

That's right folks, YOU the readers get to decide what Fluttershy will turn into! And in a complete shocking twist, I can guarantee a weekly update for this story!

Seriously.

I can.

S-stop laughing.

I have feelings too, you know! *sobs*

Anyway. Here's the poll. What should Fluttershy turn into?

Voting closes on Thursday.

Customer 5: Starlight Glimmer

Discord's New Business
Customer 5: Starlight Glimmer
by Jonathan 'KnightMysterio' Spires

All characters copyrighted to their original owners and used for non-profit amusement purposes. Please support me on patreon if you like my work!

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Ponyville...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“Discord?” Starlight Glimmer asked as she came up to the draconequus.

“Ah! Timebreaker! Good to see you,” he said. “What can I do for you?”

“Please stop calling me that, for one...” Starlight said, wincing.

“Apologies,” Discord said with surprising sincerity. “I mean it as a compliment. You're one of the only mortals I've known capable of causing as much chaos as me.”

“Thank you... I guess... but please, can you stop calling me that?” Starlight said.

Discord nodded. “Very well. Pinkie promise, cross my heart, all that nonsense, I shall stick to Glimglam and other similar nicknames,” he said, absently making the motions of the promise.

Starlight smiled. “Thank you...”

Discord smiled. “Was there anything else? I have to get ready for the party tonight,” he said.

“Actually, if you wouldn't mind giving me my free transformation?” Starlight asked.

Discord nodded. “Certainly. Deciding to make it a costume party, eh?”

Starlight nodded. “Of a sort... I want to be a changeling queen. Like Chrysalis.”

Discord blinked. “REALLY now,” he said.

Starlight nodded. “I feel guilty that I wasn't able to help her after we changed her hive... Maybe if I was a changeling queen like she was, I could understand her better, and know how to help her...”

Discord chuckled. “Honestly. You ponies. So willing to help even your worst enemies.”

Starlight smiled. “You said it yourself. I broke time. I ruined people's lives to justify my own petty beliefs about cutie marks. Instead of jailing me, like I deserved, Twilight chose to make me her student. And you... Celestia and the others took a chance on you. They let you out, gave you a chance to make friends. And together, with Trixie and Thorax, we helped save Equestria and all of changeling-kind.”

Discord frowned, remembering Tirek. “It... didn't quite work out for me at first...”

“But you made up for it,” Starlight insisted. “Trixie herself was given a chance to make amends for the Alicorn Amulet incident.” She stepped forward. “I firmly believe that there's hope for Chrysalis. That she can learn to accept friendship and harmony, and retake her place as queen. A loving, caring queen that can help Thorax lead the changelings into a new, brighter future.”

Discord stared at her for a long moment. And then he snickered. “I swear, it's contagious...”

Starlight blinked. “I'm sorry?”

Discord shook his head. “You and Sparkle and Celestia...” he said. “You all make the same kind of silly, heroic speech. Hammy goody goody goodness, passed down through the generations.”

Starlight blushed, chuckling. “I'm actually about a year older than Twilight...”

“Which makes it even funnier,” Discord said. “Well, all right. Who am I to argue with a protagonist? If nothing else, I'll get a laugh out of it.” He snapped his fingers.

Green flames surrounded Starlight. She grew larger, her fur becoming a dark, greenish-black carapace as her horn grew long and twisted. Tattered green wings sprouted from her back as her tail and mane became tattered as well. Holes appeared in her legs, and her eyes turned green.

But the most dramatic change, at least in Starlight's perspective, was the hunger. It gnawed at her, clawed at her very soul, begging her to feed. She gasped, having had no idea that it would be this intense. She needed to eat, to FEAST, she...

Prey. There was prey in front of her. Her magic reached out instinctively, sensing the prey's thoughts, what they'd love to see. In a flash of green fire, she changed, becoming a yellow pegasus with a pink mane...

“DON'T. YOU. DARE,” Discord said, snapping his fingers and forcing Starlight back to her natural changeling queen form. His eyes were glowing red with fury.

“S-Sorry... I'm just... so hungry...” Starlight said, shivering.

“Nggh...” Discord muttered. “Should have seen this coming.” He reached into his chest, opening it like a door. He pulled out a heart-shaped mass of energy, and tossed it to Starlight. The newly transformed changeling queen hissed, pouncing on the heart latching her teeth into it like a snake. Rapidly, the heart-shaped energy dwindled into nothing.

Starlight panted tiredly, slowly returning to her senses. “Thank you...” she said. “I didn't meant to...”

“It's all right,” Discord said, grumbling. “I'm so used to the candy-coated changelings now I forgot what the old ones were like.”

Starlight nodded. “I think... I think I'm good for now...” she said. She hesitated, and asked, “That energy you gave me...”

“Merely a sampling of my adoration for Fluttershy,” Discord said, smiling.

“Tasted a little like honey butter,” Starlight said.

Discord blinked. “Love has a flavor?” he asked.

Starlight licked her lips. “Apparently...” she said.

“Huh... Well,” Discord said. “First moments as Queen Starlight of the Changelings. What does it feel like?”

“Hungry... I'm... still hungry...” Starlight said, looking over herself. “And... there's pain, too...”

“Interesting...” Discord said.

“I can't feel the same way I used to...” Starlight said, frowning. She concentrated, and shifted back to her unicorn form in a flash of green. “I feel... constantly empty. It's frustrating...”

“So Queen Cheeselegs may have a reason for being so grumpy, constantly?” Discord said, looking thoughtful.

“I suppose,” Starlight said. “Anyway. I'm... going to try and figure this out...”

Discord nodded. “See you at the party?” he said.

“I think so,” Starlight said. “Thanks, Discord!” she said, trotting while still looking like her normal self.

Discord stroked his beard thoughtfully. “Hm...” In a flash of frosted flakes, he vanished and reappeared in the Crystal Empire.

“Discord, what?!” Shining Armor shouted, startled.

From the floor, where she had been playing games with her father, Flurry Heart burbled happily. “Disso!” she cooed.

“Adorable,” the draconequus said, ruffling the filly's mane. “And of course, the baby is too.”

Shining Armor rolled his eyes. “Is there anything you want, Discord? Or are you just here to be annoying?”

“Careful, Shining, I might take that as a challenge,” Discord said, smirking. “That being said, I do have a purpose here for once. Is Sunburst available to attend a party tonight?”

Shining Armor thought for a moment. “Yeah, I took the day off to spend time with my daughter. Why?”

“I've started a business,” Discord said. “For a fee, you can transform into any species or tribe of pony you want for one full day. Safety measures included, as well as all basic knowledge and instincts included.” He smirked, and said, “And yes, before you say anything, I did legally set it up, Suntush and Moontush know, and I do have all the necessary legal documents and forms signed.”

Shining Armor closed his mouth.

“That being said,” Discord continued, “I gave Twilight and her friends freebies. Pinkie Pie chose to become an alicorn with hers, and wants to hold a Pinkiecorn party.”

“What does Sunburst have to do with any of this?” Shining asked.

“Because Starlight decided to become a changeling queen, like Chrysalis, and I thought it'd be hilarious to see how she reacts to him,” Discord said.

“...Surprisingly honest,” Shining said. “But why not Trixie as well?”

Discord rolled his eyes. They came up fish. “Because she'll upstage all the fun tonight,” he said.

Shining Armor looked thoughtful. “...Heck with it,” he said. “Sounds like a blast. I'll go tell him.”

“No need,” Discord said, vanishing in a pop.

Shining Armor sighed, hugging Flurry Heart. “Discord sure is a ridiculous one, isn't he?”

“Riddicuwus!” Flurry Heart said, giggling. Shining Armor chuckled.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
That night...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Starlight walked into the party, trying to ignore the gnawing hunger in her stomach. She smiled weakly as she saw Pinkie Pie dancing near the DJ stand, Vinyl Scratch's head bobbing back and forth as she provided the beats.

“Okay... You can do this without screwing up...” Starlight said.

Twilight, meanwhile, spotted Starlight and went over to her. “You okay?”

Starlight shifted into Shining Armor's form. “Just fine, LSBFF!” she said, catching herself and changing back. “S-Sorry... It's... difficult to focus...”

Twilight nodded, hugging her. “It'll be okay. I've told the changelings living in town about your plan, so they won't be surprised. And I THINK I've convinced the Flower Trio not to panic if they see your changeling queen form tonight.”

Starlight snorted. “Those three not panicking at the drop of a hat? I'd sooner believe Discord turning himself into a gentleman. Maybe call himself 'Accord' or something like that.”

Twilight snickered. “You'll be fine,” she said.

Starlight nodded. “I hope so...” she said.

Twilight patted her on the back, and went off to talk with her other friends. Meanwhile, Starlight decided to mingle in the party.

“I can do this...” she said softly. “Just gotta maintain control for the party...”

“Starlight?” said a voice.

Starlight turned, her eyes going wide with surprise. “S-Sunburst?”

The red-headed unicorn smiled. “Good to see you, Starlight,” he said. “Heard you turned into a changeling queen for the day?”

Starlight, in a flash of green fire, reverted to her changeling queen form, flaring her wings and hissing.

“Um... Starlight?” Sunburst said, slowly backing away.

“Don't worry!” Starlight said, grinning widely and showing off a mouth full of fangs. “Everything will be fine! I'm perfectly in control!”

“Are you sure about that?” Sunburst asked.

“YES!” Starlight said, cackling. “Once our nest is made, everything will be perfectly fine! Our grubs will be beautiful!”

Nearby, one of the changelings attending the party handed over a small stack of bits to another changeling. “You were right. Things went wrong,” she said.

Starlight glomped Sunburst, giggling crazily. Twilight cautiously walked up to her. “Starlight... Put him down, please...”

Starlight hissed. “NO! He's mine! My king! We'll make a beautiful hive together!” she shouted. She looked, seeing all the other changelings in the room slowly gathering around her, and hissed at them as well.

“Starlight Glimmer,” one of the changelings said. “You're losing control of your instincts... You have to calm down...”

“Rival hive!” Starlight snarled, her horn flaring. “Stay back!”

Twilight shook her head sadly. “Sorry Starlight...” she said, preparing a sleep spell.

“NO!” Sunburst shouted suddenly. “Let me handle this!”

Twilight blinked. “Are you sure?” she said.

Sunburst nodded. “Please...” he said. “I'll explain later, but I have to handle this on my own!”

Twilight didn't have time to respond, as Starlight hissed at everyone and then ran off. One of the changelings at the party came up to Twilight, patting her on the shoulder.

“She won't hurt him,” she said.

“How can you be sure of that, Ladybug?” Twilight asked the changeling.

The red and pink changeling just smiled. “Because even with a queen's instincts overwhelming her, she still has a pony's mind behind it. The hunger... it frustrates and pains to the point where the only thing that makes you feel better besides feeding is trying to spread the pain to others. That's why we used to be so cruel. We didn't know anything else until Starlight, Discord, Thorax, and Trixie saved us.”

Another changeling came up to Twilight. “Starlight, however, knows what kindness and love is. She has an advantage we didn't,” he said. “He won't be hurt. Trust us.”

Twilight took a deep breath. “I believe you,” she said. “But I'm still worried. For the both of them.”

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Twilight's castle...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Starlight giggled madly, bursting her way through the doors of the castle. “Don't worry, my king,” she said. “Once I make a nest, everything will be all right.”

“Starlight, please...” Sunburst said. “You're hurting me.”

Starlight squeaked, setting Sunburst down. “No, no, can't have that. But can't let you get away, either. Need to feed...”

Sunburst nodded, talking as calmly as possible to the hunger-maddened changeling. “Okay, Starlight. You can feed off of me. Just please, calm down.”

“You'll... you'll let me?” Starlight asked.

Sunburst nodded, smiling warmly. “I trust you, Starlight,” he said.

“I...” Starlight grimaced, feeling her mind start to reassert herself. “I'm sorry... I'm just so hungry...”

Sunburst nodded, sitting down on the floor. “Take what you need,” Sunburst said.

Starlight hugged Sunburst again, and began to feed. A glowing pink light flowed out of Sunburst and into Starlight's mouth. Sunburst staggered, feeling himself being drained by Starlight. “Nggh...”

“I'm sorry...” Starlight said. “I'm so, so sorry...” After a few minutes of feeding, she stopped, fully in control of herself again. “I never knew it would be like this...”

Sunburst staggered, dizzy. “Whoo... What a rush...” he said, chuckling. “I'm fine, I'm fine, just... A little tired...”

Starlight shook her head, ashamed of herself. “This... I didn't want this... I just wanted to try and understand Chrysalis...”

Sunburst shook his head, trying to clear the dizziness. “Why?”

Starlight sighed wearily. “We saved the changelings, but Chrysalis lost everything in the process. She's alone now. I believe that there's hope for her, that she can be reformed...”

Sunburst frowned. “She kept the changelings starving and hostile, hoarding most of their love for herself. She kept them half formed from underfeeding.”

“And I kept an entire town brainwashed and crippled. And I tried to DESTROY TIME,” Starlight said. “If someone like me can be reformed...”

Sunburst smiled warmly. “The fact that you care so much about what happened shows that you're not evil. You were just misguided back then.” His face fell. “But Chrysalis... She's known nothing but hatred, ambition, and evil her entire life. Do you really think she can be reformed?”

“I truly do,” Starlight said, looking thoughtful. “Even more now than I do before. This hunger... I fed well off of you but it's still there. I believe if we show Chrysalis that there is a better way, we can save her like we did the rest of her race.”

Sunburst sighed. “I hope you're right...” he said. “When she came for the royal family in the Crystal Empire, it was all I could do to keep myself out of danger after Shining Armor, Cadance, and Flurry Heart were taken. Plus, from what Shining Armor told me, she's sworn vengeance on you. I don't want you to get hurt, Starlight.”

Starlight shook her head. “I have to try,” she said.

Sunburst chuckled, hugging her again. “You're better than you think you are, Starlight Glimmer,” he said. “Always so stubborn...”

“And this time, for the right reasons,” Starlight said, smiling a little.

“You gonna be okay now?” Sunburst asked.

Starlight nodded. “If you stay with me...” she said. “I don't think I can go back to the party...”

Sunburst nodded. “I have the time,” he said, sitting next to the changeling queen and nuzzling her. “I'll stay with you all night.”

“Thank you,” Starlight said, blushing.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
The next day...
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

“..So, I think I'm pregnant,” Starlight said.

“WHAT?!” Twilight shouted, Discord literally falling apart with laughter.

Sunburst grinned weakly, looking sheepish. “Yeah, um... I've always cared for Starlight, and with all the ambient love energy in the air, push came to shove came to flank bumping...”

Starlight grimaced. “Sunburst and I think we can change me into a changeling like Thorax... Discord... I'm gonna have to ask you to let me stay a changeling queen until I give birth...” she said, blushing, not entirely unhappy.

Discord nodded, laughing. “Starting this business is the best thing I ever did!”

TO BE CONTINUED
Next time: Rarity transforms!

Author's Note

...Well THAT escalated quickly.

Anyway. Changeling Royal (Chrysalis-type) won the vote with 29% of 257 votes. Thanks to everyone for participating! It was a close call between this and Dragon.

Next time, we go with a high fashion transformation, as Rarity is next on the shifting block! Vote for what she transforms into here!