"You can only move forward."
"You can only move forward."
By
Darkstone57
Leo was contently resting his romp on his sofa, watching the three fillies that he cherished so much playing and chatting away.
He looked over to his left to see that his partner had a warm smile on her face as she kept looking between her book and her foals.
Leo removed himself from the sofa and stretched his limbs and let out a long yawn, to then hear a knock on his living room door.
As he regained his posture, he turned to see who was at the door and the sight of his visitor made him release a defeated sigh.
“Was beginning to wonder if you would notice...” Leo stated to his visitor.
“Leo, this isn’t healthy.” Luna replied with worry.
As Luna stepped forward, the living room dissipated and the scene transformed to the Canterlot Throne Room.
Leo looked at the room in wonder, the sheer scale and décor was impressive enough for a simple stallion like him. But, when he returned his gaze to Luna, she still looked worried.
Leo exhaled in defeat, “I know it wasn’t healthy for me to get in too deep, but,” Leo began to explain, trying not to get worked up, “There are days where I just can’t control how I feel, no matter how hard I try.” Leo admitted, with a frustrated tone to his voice.
Luna looked over the stallion, “I may never be able to understand how you feel, but...” Luna took a moment to stand straight as she looked at her friend and addressed him formally, “Leo Corwin, I have come to you for another reason; a mission.”
Leo looked at Luna with confusion.
“This is not a mission where swords and magic are necessary to help those who need it,” Luna began, her voice calm and strong, “But, it is your words and experience that may be the key to helping those who need it the most at this point in time.”
Leo had more questions in rolling around in his head.
“Tomorrow noon, you shall be accompanying me to Ponyville.”
Leo simply shrugged his shoulder in acceptance, “Alright. But, why me?”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It had only been a few hours since the news broke out. Though it happened days ago, only today did Ponyville know the truth of why the town’s royal couple were staying behind closed doors over the last few moons;
The couple have been mourning the loss of their unborn child...
When the truth was known, nothing but a continuous gloom loomed over Ponyville.
For the last few months, when the couple had announced that they were expecting, the town had been in nothing but high spirits. Talks about the babies’ gender, name, race, colour, party had been the talk of the town. It got the citizens thinking about the future for all ponies and some couples in the town had even come to their own decision for trying for their babies. Even Pinkie, had trouble keeping up with such high spirits.
But then, after days of silence and concern, Caramel, Twilight’s partner, stepped out of the castle the ensemble of townsfolk with a solemn look and though it took every fibre of his being to stop him from breaking down, he only said one sentence the broke all their hearts; “We... we’ve lost the baby...”
Before the news broke, and since, Twilight’s and Caramel’s friends and family all came swarming in to offer comfort and care; tears were shed, hugs were long and silence seemed never ending.
The grey clouds hung over Ponyville, as nopony who was not family or close to the couple dared approach the castle, all of them knowing that it would be best for the couple to grieve properly.
The shocking thing to all of the ponies, including the friends and family members, was that a miscarriage was a rare thing to happen to anypony. Because of that, nopony, not even those closest to them, knew what to say to help them and dared not to try, lest they hurt their feelings.
But, in a flash of blue, Princess Luna, along with her friend Leo, were determined to be the ones to give the answers they wanted, no, needed to hear.
Luna and Leo and looked at the large doors of Twilight’s castle with solemn expressions.
“This is it, Leo,” Luna spoke up, keeping her focus on the door, “Are you ready?”
Leo took a moment to bring himself together with a deep breath, “Yeah...”
Luna stepped forward and knocked on the left door, Leo stood behind her, letting her take the lead.
After a moment, the door opened with a slow creak as the head of Starlight Glimmer peered out, her face was nothing but downtrodden, even with the forced smile she gave Luna to hide her sadness as she politely greeted the pair of them.
Starlight allowed the two of them in, she seemed apprehensive of Leo, as she knew from the letter Luna sent to them; that informed them simply that she will be bringing somepony she knew to help, but nothing more. Wondering what he could possibly do to help her friends.
Leo did nothing but politely greet Starlight and followed the mares through the castle, remaining silent, trying to keep his nerves together, and contemplating what he could possibly say.
Eventually, the three of them reached the door to where they agreed to meet. Luna turned to Leo, who took another deep breath and gave Luna a firm nod, at his response; Luna opened the door to a library section where columns and rows upon rows of shelves were filled with a plethora of books. And in the centre, sitting on a sofa with one adjacent to it across a table, were Twilight Sparkle and Caramel. The two were comforting each other in a heartbreaking embrace, eyes weary from restlessness and long hours of wallowing in despair over the loss of it all.
Starlight told Luna that she would leave them all alone as the two entered the room, shutting the door behind them gently.
Luna and Leo made their ways round the sofa across from the grieving couple and placed themselves in a comfortable position.
Twilight watched the pair of them sit and nudged Caramel so that he would break away from her to give the two of them the attention. When they looked upon the blue Pegasus with the black hoodie next to Luna, they were surprised to say the least.
“I am thankful that you allowed us to come see you on short notice.” Luna gratefully thanked them with a curt nod. Leo gave a curt nod to greet the couple.
“It’s alright, Luna.” Twilight responded, her voice strained but calm.
“This is Leo Corwin,” Luna stated with a hoof pointing towards him, “This is the pony who will help.”
“H-Hello...” Leo greeted with a nervous voice.
Caramel looked at him with apprehension and annoyance, when Leo caught his expression, a certain cord strung in his mind, ‘That face... I remember...’
“Forgive me, your highness,” Caramel spoke up, his voice agitated, “But, I am unsure on how he is meant to help us...”
Leo felt this was going to go south... fast.
“Leo, here, wishes to help you two with your loss.” Luna said, calmly and with sympathy.
To which Caramel winced in frustration, “I’m sorry but... How?”
Twilight turned to Caramel and placed a hoof on his, attempting to calm him, “Caramel, please...”
“How can you possibly...” Caramel tried to remain calm with Twilight’s touch but anypony could tell he was about to explode, “How can you help, Leo?” He asked, slightly frustrated.
Leo sat up straight and spoke calmly, “I am here... to help you two move forward...”
“Excuse me!?” Caramel snapped.
“Caramel...” Twilight tried to reason with him but he was too angry.
“How can you possibly help us?!?” Caramel roared, “Are you here to insult us? Huh? Is that it!?!” Caramel spat, Leo felt insulted slightly as his eyes narrowed, “Go on, then, tell me how I am feeling right now! If you can’t, then you can take your sorry hide and get out!!”
“You feel like you got stabbed in the heart,” Leo responded firmly without missing a beat, “That a monster drove their claws into your soul and tore it out of you. Then, it chewed apart the place where you held all your hopes and dreams for the foal you wished for them to call you ‘daddy’, and then rammed it back inside you without a second thought.” Leo remained calm as he explained, Caramel and Twilight were shocked by how right he was but Leo knew he had drive the nail in to get them to listen, “And, no matter how hard you try to fill it, no matter what you think, what you feel... the pain... will never go away...” Leo finished with a calm but heavy breath through his nostrils as he looked at the grieving couple. Luna looked at her friend with a small smile at the corner of her lips.
“How...” Twilight began, shocked at his words, “How do you know that....?”
“Because,” Leo began with a deep breath as he forced out those painful words out once more, “Five years ago... I lost my unborn foal...”
Twilight gasped, bringing her hooves to her mouth. Caramel’s jaw dropped at his confession, his heart wrenching with guilt over his actions.
It took him a moment to gather the words to apologise but Leo raised a hoof to stop him, “It’s alright, Caramel. If I were in your position, I would have said the same thing.”
Luna’s horn lit up, and in a flash of blue, a sapphire crystal appeared in the centre of the table, “You know what this is, Twilight?” Luna asked, gently.
“A memory crystal...” Twilight said with slight surprise.
“This crystal holds the scene that Leo is haunted by to this day, place your hooves on it and you shall see the truth in his words.” Luna explained, calmly.
“Are you sure...?” Caramel asked, uncertain.
“Caramel,” Leo addressed him politely, gaining his attention, “For my help to work.... This is something you two need to see.”
Caramel and Twilight looked at each other with uncertainty. Twilight nodded first, after a few moments, and took Caramels hoof she still held and placed it on the memory crystal with her own.
Their eyes lit up with a bright white as they were taken to that scene.
They witnessed it all...
The grieving mother who did nothing but weep in her bed, the enraged father who was ready to throttle the doctor who gave him a false promise, the split second where Leo was ready to let his anger take him to a deep dark place but instead went into that room and broke down into a sea of tears as he consoled his broken partner...
When it ended, the couple had tears at the back of their eyes as they looked upon the Pegasus sitting across them with a broken but warm smile on his face.
“I...” Caramel tried to speak, doing his best not to cry, “I am so sorry...”
Leo chuckled lightly, “You have nothing to apologise for...”
Caramel and Twilight looked confused but Leo knew what to say to the two of them now, and with a calm and gentle voice, he spoke; “I know that... Whatever you two might think you need to do, there is one truth about this; there is no ‘getting over it’.” Leo shook his head, before going on, “What you two are going through right now... That’s normal. And, I know, miscarriages are rare but those feelings you have and what you will feel over time that too, is normal.” Twilight and Caramel did nothing but listen, “Even to this day... I still feel the pain of it all. I can go on for weeks wishing nothing but the best for my future, but then one day, something will happen and it could anything; a song, a word, an image and then suddenly – that wall you built to stop the pain flooding in will break...” Leo looked to the floor an exhausted expression.
When he remained silent for too long, Luna placed a hoof on his back, he looked at her and saw she was giving him a smile to encourage him onward.
Leo looked at Caramel and Twilight, who were waiting for him to go on and with a solemn thought he continued; “Yes, that wall may break, but over time, you will rebuild it. The pain doesn’t go away; I know that for a fact... But, there is only one thing you two can do from here on.”
Twilight and Caramel leaned earnestly as they listened closely to Leo’s words.
“You can only move forward.” Leo said with a heartfelt smile.
The couple were unsure by what he meant, so he explained; “Yes, what happened to your unborn foal is tragic and nothing will ever change that... But, that doesn’t mean that life stops for you two. Because I can tell from looking at the pair of you, you two love each other very much don’t you?”
At his question, Twilight and Caramel looked at each other and gave the other a heartfelt smile.
“I thought so,” Leo chuckled, “Then, I know one thing will happen; when the two of you are ready; you can try again. That doesn’t have to be anytime soon but know that just because you lost one doesn’t mean you can’t try for another.” He said with earnestness as he looked at the couple. “But, you must promise me one thing;”
At his request, the couple looked at him curiously.
“Don’t forget the one you lost, but remember them as a part of your family. Because, even though they are gone; they are not forgotten.” Leo said firmly.
Twilight and Caramel looked at Leo for a moment before giving him a silent but honest nod.
After that, the three of them shared a warm hug for a long time. Luna watched on with a warm smile.
Leo and Luna gave their farewells as Twilight and Caramel left the castle to see them off with Luna’s teleport, not before thanking the pair for their help.
When the two reappeared before Leo’s flat. Leo gave a sigh of relief.
“You did brilliantly, Leo...” Luna said happily.
“I’m just glad I could help them.” Leo replied with a smile.
“You may not have said much, but I think it is what they needed to hear.”
“Wish I could have had that advice myself, back then.” Leo said with a half hearted chuckle.
Luna was taken aback by his words and asked; “What do you mean?”
Leo looked at Luna with another broken smile and shook his head, “It’s nothing. Anyways, I best get in there and make sure those monkeys haven’t torn the place up.” Leo said, pointing his hoof at the door.
“I suppose so,” Luna said looking at the door to his home with a smile, “Farewell, Leo and thank you.”
Leo waved her goodbye, saying; “Happy to help, Luna, take care.” Before he entered his home and promptly closed the door.
As Luna began to leave, she realised what he meant and felt sorry for Leo, ‘You didn’t have anypony to help you, didn’t you?’
The End
Author's Note
Yup, I did another one. Going on with what I would say to someone if they had went through what I went through.
Would like to than Anonpencil, again, for his support and for the inspiration to do this.
And, yes, I didn't have any help when I lost mine.
Feel free to say how forced and contrived this is and tear it apart. I'm not fussed. Honesty and constructive criticism are appreciated. Just, please, be respectful.
Take care.
We miss you, little poppet, and we all love you.
