Starlight Glimmer's Increasingly Odd Day
The sound of a rooster crowing echoed from Sweet Apple Acres, all over Ponyville. Even into the crystal halls of Princess Twilight's castle. Even into a once-unused bedroom two doors down from a snoring dragon.
Starlight yawned and rolled onto her side. She wasn't quite ready to get up yet. After Princess Luna entered her dreams to warn about the invasion, she'd been having trouble getting to sleep. Honestly, she was a bit scared of what might happen. Twilight would understand if she took another half hour. Right?
Too bad Princess Celestia wasn't sleeping in.
The sun swiftly rose high enough over the horizon to peek through Starlight's curtains. The beam of light lanced directly onto her closed eyelids, making sleep a virtual impossibility. With a sigh, she rolled back the other way and peeled her crusty eyes open.
And was met with a smiling pink face not two inches away.
"Aaaah!" Starlight thrashed out of her blankets. "Pinkie Pie? What are you doing here?"
The peppy party pony giggled. "Good morning to you, too! Sleep well?"
"I suppose." Starlight inched to the far side of her bed and slid out, keeping the furniture between her and Pinkie. "Shouldn't you be, I dunno, baking a cake or something?"
"Sure! What kind would you like?"
"No, I meant-" Starlight paused. Was this a prank? A trick question? Maybe. But Pinkie was still standing there, looking at her expectantly. Besides, experience taught her that Pinkie would not be deterred by logic. Distracted by something fun, on the other hoof... "Can I get a dozen red-velvet cupcakes?"
"Of course," Pinkie grinned wider than ever. "Anything else?"
"Er- do you have chocolate sprinkles?"
"Chocolate sprinkles on red velvet!" Pinkie sounded absolutely horrified.
"No, no, never mind. Just... however you would usually decorate them."
Starlight stepped towards the bathroom, only to find a pony in her path. "What? What did I forget?"
"What color frosting do you want?"
"Pinkie!" Starlight rolled her eyes. "I don't have time for this." She picked Pinkie up in her magic and moved her to the side. "I have to use the bathroom, and get ready for the day, and you shouldn't be in my room at Celestia-knows-what-time in the morning anyway!" She trotted past. "Now, please leave before Twilight comes in and makes this whole situation even more awkward."
"Okie-dokey, Loki!"
Starlight looked back as the door closed, and sighed when she saw not a single spot of pink. Then she turned on the shower and resolved not to give it a second thought.
It was a couple hours later that Starlight stepped out of the castle and walked into Ponyville proper. Since she basically made friends with all of the changelings, she was now recognized by the townsponies as one of their heroes. That should've been a relief- no more worrying about them judging her past. Instead, it only made things more difficult. Now, everypony knew who she was, and loved her for it. They all wanted a moment of her time. Worse yet, some of them had taken to glorifying her previous exploits, too. She'd heard the name "Starlight the Timebreaker" passed around.
Which, okay, was a cool name. She wouldn't object to Trixie calling her that. Or Sunburst. Or... well, no, that was about it. It would be odd if Twilight used the name. Maybe Rainbow, if they were teasing each other. But that was definitely it.
Starlight was relieved that not many ponies were out and about yet. She could take a walk, check on her cupcakes, and then maybe stop into Quills and Sofas for some more stationary. They'd been going through a lot of that in the Castle of Friendship.
Twenty minutes later she'd worked up a fair amount of sweat, and was grateful for the cool air waiting on the other side of Sugarcube Corner's door.
Not so much for the mass of fuzz squeezed into the shape of a pony that greeted her.
"Starlight Glimmer!" she screeched at the top of her lungs. "I have those cupcakes you wanted!"
Starlight flinched and curled inward a little. "That's great, Pinkie. How much is that again?"
"That'll be 7 bits, please. Er, make that 'seven'. Want to keep proper grammar."
"Huh?" Starlight didn't quite understand the difference, but she accepted it. She levitated the proper number out of her purse and took hold of the box. "So what color frosting did you decide on?"
Pinkie shrugged. "I couldn't decide. I just made each cupcake a different color; go ahead, look!" Starlight opened the box and was met with a spectrum that would've impressed a Cloudsdale weather team. "This way you can try them all and tell me which is your favorite!"
"Wait, are they different flavors?"
"Nope! Just colors. Though come to think of it," Pinkie tapped her chin, "I sometimes think the colors do taste different; I mean, it feels like there should be a difference between blue and yellow even though it's the same frosting just with different food coloring, but that feels like it should have a different taste, right? Like, walk under a blue light and a yellow light and it feels different, so should blue frosting and yellow frosting taste different? And then green should taste like the both of them together, but also something different. And don't get me started on different shades..."
Starlight swiftly backed out of the shop in mid-rant. It was either that, or stick around for another hour listening to Pinkie's internal debate made external. That was a mistake you only made once.
Starlight's saddlebags bulged with scrolls when she stepped out of Q&S minutes later. A quick joke about being the best customer, the cursory social niceties about family- one sided, for her- and she was on her way. Just how Starlight liked it.
"Hiya!"
Starlight nearly dropped her cupcakes. "Pinkie! What is it now?"
"I was just wondering, what are you doing this afternoon?"
"Studying with Twilight, like I usually do." Really, as much as the ponies were after her, shouldn't her schedule have been fairly well known by this point?
"That sounds like fun!" Pinkie chirped, "But I was thinking you might like to go bowling instead?"
"Maybe some other time." Starlight trotted around her friend and headed for the castle.
"Why not today?" Pinkie began toodling backwards to keep up with Starlight. "Don't you like bowling?"
"I guess it's okay," Starlight replied.
"Oo-ooh, did you have some horrible, awful, totally traumatic bowling-related accident when you were a filly? Did one of your parents have a bowling cutie mark and go on a world tour and never come home so you blamed their cutie mark subconsciously and that helped build up your resentment of cutie marks and caused you to become an evil tyrannical cult leader?"
Starlight gaped at her. "No! I already told Twilight, it was Sunburst leaving that did that. I don't have anything against bowling." She deliberately did not talk about her parents.
"Great!" Pinkie smiled. "Then you won't have any problems when we all go bowling tomorrow."
"No," Starlight rolled her eyes, "I wo- wait a second. If we're going bowling tomorrow, why would you ask me to go today?"
"So you wouldn't feel left out, silly."
Starlight heard, paused, processed, and failed to understand. She slowly dragged a hoof down her face. "Much as I know I'm going to regret this... could you please explain that one?"
"I thought you'd never ask!"
Pinkie reached to the side and pulled a chair from absolutely nowhere, pushing Starlight into it. She flopped over, and while she tried to extricate herself, Pinkie managed to set up a rotating chalkboard. On the chalkboard were pictures of all their friends.
"Tomorrow I'm going to take everypony out bowling," Pinkie began. "I know that Twilight likes math problems; Applejack and Rainbow like competition; Rarity would never miss an opportunity to make bowling shoes look fabulous; and Fluttershy is just really freakily good at sports in general. But I didn't know if you like bowling." Pinkie flipped the board over. On the new side was a picture of Starlight sitting off to the side while her six friends bowled. "I didn't want to drag you along without knowing, so I decided to bring it up today, first. That way I could have time to change plans if it didn't work out." Pinkie flipped the board over again- but now there was a picture of Starlight happily celebrating with her friends. "Now I know, and we can all have fun bowling together!"
"You could've just asked if I like bowling."
"I did! But In a slightly more round-about way. I've heard that as many as fifty percent of viewers find randomness irritating. If I were to just suddenly ask about bowling without any buildup at all, it wouldn't be much different than if I started saying 'pickle-barrel-cumquat' for no reason."
Starlight felt her eye twitch. "Pinkie, that is exactly what you do- what you did."
"Nope! First, I asked about your plans. Then I-"
Starlight reflexively took hold of the pink one with her magic, silencing her. She was getting a horrible sense of deja-vu. "You aren't feeling compelled to just do whatever I ask, are you?"
Pinkie shook her head.
"Oh, good." Starlight dropped her. "In that case, I'm going back to the castle. I've still got cupcakes to eat, and this parchment isn't going to sort itself."
She trotted away as Pinkie got back up; Pinkie shouted after her, "Wait! I haven't asked what size horseshoe you wear!"
Several more hours later, Starlight levitated a clear plastic bag full of cupcake wrappers and parchment scraps out the back door. As the Princess of Friendship, Twilight wanted to be a friend to all of Equestria. Apparently, that included the land of Equestria itself. She'd started enforcing a recycling policy in all of Ponyville, and it was Starlight's job to remove all the paper from the castle and put it in the giant recycling dumpster installed behind the castle.
Which was a far cry from her old solution of simply teleporting waste paper to the heart of an active volcano.
Starlight tossed the bag and yawned. Maybe she'd turn in early tonight and-
"Ouch!"
The yelp from the dumpster brought Starlight up short. Somewhat reluctantly, she turned back. "Pinkie?"
The lower door slid open from the inside, and a cube of pink fur pushed itself out. "Hiya Starlight!" She popped back into the shape of a pony and pronked forward. "You know, this whole recycling thing has made Fluttershy so happy- I think she's had nightmares about being turned into a paper towel."
"That... doesn't really make sense."
"Sure it does! Anyway, how'd you like the cupcakes?"
"They were-" Starlight hesitated- "Fine. Thank you."
"Just fine?" Pinkie's mane seemed to flatten a little.
"They were amazing!" she amended. "As always."
"Great!" Pinkie smiled. Then she narrowed her eyes and leaned in close. "What about... the frosting."
"I uh, er-" Starlight started to sweat again. "I guess... the saffron?"
"Double great!" Starlight sighed as Pinkie backed off finally. "I have some last minute baking to do, but I'll see you tomorrow, mmm-kay?"
"Yeah-heh-heh-heah..." Starlight waved her off. She hoped that was it for the day.
Starlight slid into bed and pulled her blankets up. She breathed out slowly, enjoying the comfort. It had been quite a day.
"And it's not over yet!"
Starlight's eyes snapped open.
Oh, no. Oh Celestia, no.
Pinkie stood in the same spot as that morning, grinning ear to ear.
There was no point in resisting. "I give up!" Starlight lay back down. "Ask, so I can at least try and get some sleep."
"Why so eager to sleep? Is that your hobby?"
Starlight covered her face with her hooves. "Do I look like a dragon to you?"
"Nah," Pinkie shook her head. "You look like a pony. A really sleepy pony."
Starlight slammed her hooves into her face this time.
Pinkie didn't seem to notice. "Well, if sleeping isn't your hobby, what is?"
"Casting mind-altering spells on my friends."
"Oooo-ooh. Try me, try me!"
"NO!" Starlight applied hoof-to-face treatment once more. "I was being sarcastic, I'm not supposed to do that anymore!"
"Oh." Pinkie frowned. "Sorry."
"It's fine, I probably shouldn't have said it." Starlight let out a very long breath. "What was the question?"
"Do you have a hobby?"
She thought about it. What did she like to do? Hanging out with Trixie was nice. Magic, of course. Especially coming up with new spells. But that didn't count, did it?
"Starlight?" Pinkie waved a hoof in front of her face. "Did you fall asleep sitting up with your eyes open?"
"No," she said after a moment. "I was just... thinking. Truthfully, I don't think I have any hobbies. These days I just... go with the flow. I'm always with my friends, and I want to do what they want to do."
Pinkie sat down with a thump. "Whoa. That's... really noble. But also kind of sad. I mean, you're their friend, too. They probably don't want you missing out on living your life because you're so busy helping them live theirs."
"Are we talking about me or you?" Starlight said pointedly. "You're the Element of Laughter; you make everypony smile. But what makes you smile?"
Pinkie hopped up. "Seeing my friends smile, of course!" She froze in midair. "Ooooooooh." She slowly settled back onto the floor. "Maybe we're more alike than I thought, Starlight Glimmer. We both just want to make the world a better place."
Starlight nodded. "I just happened to use forcible cutie mark removal and time travel to do it. Which ended badly. I'm sorry, by the way," she apologized.
Pinkie slid over next to her friend. "We've forgiven you! Besides," Pinkie grinned, "You also used 'Saving Our Lives By Convincing All The Changelings To Shoot Magic Love Beams' to do it. And that hasn't ended badly at all! Apart from all the complaints about Thorax looking like an OC," she mumbled.
"What was that?"
"Nothing!" Pinkie hopped out of bed. "I should let you get to sleep. Oh- and if you're having trouble, just Chortle at the Kooky and Snortle at the Spooky! Good night!"
Pinkie shut off the light, and when Starlight flipped it back on, the other mare was gone. "Now that's spooky," she muttered. Then she remembered Pinkie's advice. "Ha!" she declared. "Heh heh... Well what do you know. It works!" Starlight lay back down, smiling. Whatever might happen, she could laugh about it later. Or in it's face. Either or.
Starlight dreamed she was on a boat- a really small boat. She was trying to find land, but she couldn't spot any. And beneath her boat was an army of sharks, all ravenous, all bumping against the hull and trying to get her to fall out. She tried shoving her sack of potatoes overboard, but they just pushed it back into place. And then they started playing music. It was loud, and it thrummed in her skull, and she rolled over, trying to drown the sound out with her potato sack- er, pillow?
Starlight woke up, confused. The music was still playing; somepony had set up bass speakers right next to her headboard. Her whole bed was vibrating, and she-
Wait.
Where was she?
"SURPRISE!"
Starlight cowered behind her blankets before she realized that it was just her friends- all of them, and they were all looking at her. They all smiled, and many were wearing small cone-shaped hats. For just an instant, she understood what it must've felt like to walk into Our Town the first time.
Then she saw the decorations. Streamers hung everywhere; floor to ceiling, through the rafters, a convoluted mess of chaos that Discord would love. Balloons floated among the web. Confetti littered the floor, except for the area behind her friends, which was suspiciously clear. At the far end of the rather large room, groups of white bottle-shapes stood proudly. They were in a bowling alley, one that had been decorated for a party.
"S'not my birthday," Starlight muttered.
"Nope!" Pinkie hopped closer. "Today's even more special! Today's your one year anniversary!"
"Anniversary of what?"
Now it was Twilight who stepped up. "One year ago, Starlight, you broke into my castle and tried to re-write history." Starlight winced, but Twilight continued on. "But when I tried to stop you, you instead chose a different path: the path of friendship. And now, here we are. You've made friends-" Trixie took off her hat and gave a grateful smile. "-You've won battles-" Thorax dipped his head. "-And you've been a better student than I could ever have hoped. I'm proud to not just be your teacher, but also your friend. We're all proud." The ponies cheered loudly, and Starlight felt a wetness in the corner of her eyes.
"Thank you," she whispered. "Thank you, all of you!"
"Now come on!" Rainbow Dash swooped down. "There's a mountain of cupcakes over here that aren't going to eat themselves!"
"Hit it!" Pinkie shouted, and DJ Pon-3 dropped a new beat. Starlight was sent flying by the wave of sound out of the speakers. Thankfully, she landed among her friends, who caught her and passed her along. Starlight smiled wider. This was pretty cool. There was just one thing.
"Hey Pinkie," she called out, "How did I get here?"
"I dunno," the party pony admitted. "I left that to Rainbow Dash. She has experience with this sort of thing."
"Huh." Starlight looked back at her bed, wondering if she'd need a teleportation spell to get it back in her room. "And yesterday-"
"I was trying to figure out what to do for this party. It was actually really hard," Pinkie complained. "After everything, there's a lot nopony knows about you. Come to think of it, When was your birthday?"
"I'll tell you later," Starlight promised. "I'll answer any questions you have."
"Great!" Pinkie reached into her mane. "Because I have quite a list." The scroll she pulled out didn't seem all that long- until she dropped the end and let it unroll. Starlight gulped as the far end of the scroll disappeared out the door and kept going.
"Did I say any questions? Maybe just a few..."
Author's Note
This was a dumb, simple idea I had that turned into something much longer than intended. In fact, it's probably longer than it should have ever been. I hope someone finds enjoyment in it though.
