Sunset Shimmer did not expect this afternoon to end up with Twilight Sparkle communicating with giant bagels in a cave.
At least she assumed that Twilight was communicating with them, making sounds of affirmation and scribbling in her notebook while nodding.
Sunset looked to the left, and then to the right. “Um, Twilight―”
“Shh. They’re not done speaking yet,” Twilight said. “Uh huh. Yeah.” She scribbled in her notebook. “Oh! That’s interesting!” She scribbled some more.
Finally, Twilight seemed to have collected what she was looking for, faced Sunset, and handed her her notebook.
“Okay, Sunset.”
“Mhm?” Sunset asked as she paged through the notebook, the writing inside of it being complete gibberish.
“We have come across a species of sapient, nongendered, homosexual bagels.”
“Uh.” Sunset closed the notebook. “Did you say―”
“Yes.” Twilight nodded. “They have no ears.”
Sunset looked around and bit her tongue. “But you just said―”
“Exactly!” Twilight said. “And they need mucus to travel back to their home planet.”
Sunset glared at Twilight and pursed her lips. “Twilight, you’re not making any―woah hold the phone what are you keep your finger away from―”
But it was too late. Twilight’s finger was digging around inside Sunset’s nose, much to her concern, where it scraped out a booger.
Twilight smiled at the booger. “Alright! Now we can
Sunset Shimmer woke up with a start, taking short staccato breaths until they smoothed out to a more measured pace. She glanced outside to see the sun peeking out over the horizon.
Man, that was a weird dream, she thought to herself as she eased out of bed and put her slippers on. Well, time to eat breakfast, I guess.
She went into the kitchen where herself as a demon was sitting at the table eating eggs. She held up a hand in recognition as she beelined towards the cabinet and pulled out some instant coffee.
“Hey, me,” she said.
The demon murmured in response because its mouth was full of eggs. “How’s being an awful person?”
Sunset chuckled as she prepared a cup and threw it in the microwave. “You get used to it after a while,” she said as she punched the time into the microwave and set it to cook. “There are days when I even suspect I’m a decent human being.”
“Well,” the demon said before shoveling more eggs into her mouth, “you and I both know that’s a lie. Partially because you’re not human at all.” She sipped on her orange juice.
Sunset lazily punched into the air. “Well, you know what they say. Fake it until you make it.”
“Eventually the truth will come out,” her doppelganger said with a slight growl.
The microwave blared, signaling it was done. “Well, I guess I’ll just have to rely on everyone being too stupid to realize what a piece of trash I am, then, won’t I?” Sunset said as she removed the piping hot coffee from the microwave and sat down across from the demon, who finished her eggs and was now nursing her orange juice.
“They’ll piece it together eventually,” the demon said as it sipped on the juice. “I mean, keeping the school divided through fear doesn’t wash off.”
“Right,” Sunset replied as she took in the aroma of her cheap coffee.
“Or zombifying the entire school.”
“Right.”
“Or.” The demon picked her teeth with a claw. “Y’know, trying to kill a bunch of people because they were trying to stop you from taking over Equestria.”
Sunset shrugged. “Like I said, it’s not my fault that they can’t see what a monster I am. So I’m just going to keep―” she waved a hand through the air “―lying my pants off until they figure it out and ditch me.” She sipped on her coffee, upon which her eyes popped open. “Something’s not right.”
“What is it?” The demon asked as she continued to sip on her juice.
Sunset pointed at her cup of coffee. “I distinctly remember pouring coffee, but this tastes like tea.”
“Hmm.” The demon finished her juice and poofed away the glass. “That’s strange.”
“Strange is right,” Sunset said as she stared at the cup. She sipped it again. “Now it tastes like orange juice.” She took another sip. “Now apple.” Another sip. “Now… rutabaga?” Sunset shook her head. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say I was
Sunset woke up in a bed. Or maybe a couch.
On a second sensory rundown, definitely a couch. And her head felt something awful.
She opened her eyes with some effort. They eventually focused on a room with someone sitting in a chair. That someone, upon further focus, turned out to be Twilight slamming down an energy drink and throwing it into a pile of similarly labeled cans. She didn’t look so hot.
Sunset rumbled into a seated position, at which Twilight’s head snapped to her with a smile, eyes bloodshot. “Good morning, Sunset! How are you feeling?”
Sunset rubbed her head and groaned. “I’m feeling kind of… bleh, actually.” Sunset smirked. “Like someone knocked me out with one of those foam swords.”
Twilight sneered and pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. “Just as I suspected. Someone attempted to take advantage of you.” She yawned. “It’s a good thing I was here with you. I had to keep the door telekinetically barred all night.” Just then, the door lost its purple sheen that Sunset hadn’t noticed was there until it disappeared.
Sunset half-grinned as a warmth exuded through her. “Aw, that’s sweet.” She looked around. “By the way, whose house are we in?”
“I dunno,” Twilight said with a shrug as her eyes fluttered. “One of your friends’, I think.” She tittered. “Well, I guess they’re all your friends, technically.”
A knock came from the door. “Permission to come in.”
Sunset’s ears perked up. Is that…
“That would be up to Sunset,” Twilight interjected as she looked over to the young woman on the couch.
Sunset hummed contentedly. “Yeah, sure, Bulk. Come in.”
The door opened to reveal the hulking brute of a teenager holding what appeared to be a comically small glass of water. “Oh, thank goodness you’re alright,” he said as he walked over to Sunset and handed her the actually-quite-large glass of water, which she thirstily gulped down. “I wanted to throw a nice party and then you got woozy all of a sudden and―”
“It’s okay, Bulk.” Sunset gulped down some more water. It turned out she was very thirsty. “Unfortunately, these things happen.”
Bulk Biceps snarled and shook a fist. “If I find out who did this, I’m reporting them straight to the authorities.” He relaxed his hand and the muscles on his face, then smiled. “You’re just lucky you have such a good friend.”
Sunset glanced at Twilight, who seriously looked like she needed some sleep.
Yeah, I guess I am.
