On the Origins of Alicorns

by Revan

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Comedy
Length: 294

He just wanted to know the origin of alicorns. Was that too much to ask?

An investigator sets out to ask ponies across Equestria one question: What is the origin of alicorns?

The answers he gets range from the informative to the implausible to the downright insane.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2017-03-25 00:58:21 UTC

The Multitude of Alicorn Origins

Note: The following is a direct transcript from the investigator's notes.

Do you know anything about the origins of Alicorns?

"Eenope."

Do you have any speculations as to the origins of Alicorns?

"Eenope."

...Would Starlight Glimmer have any speculations as to the origins of Alicorns?

"Eeyup."

Big Mac, resident of Ponyville

Starlight Glimmer, student to Princess Twilight

Rainbow Dash, former Element and current Paladin of Harmony

Maud Pie, geologist

Pinkie Pie, former Element and current Paladin of Harmony

Zecora, Shaman and resident of the Everfree Forest

Applebloom, Younger sister of Applejack

Twilight Sparkle

Cheese Sandwich

Applejack

Trixie

Discord

Blueblood

Cadance

Shining Armor

Flurry Heart

Rarity

Sunset Shimmer, Location CLASSIFIED

(Note: when the investigator got back, he was confronted by Twilight Sparkle, who was distinctly unenthused with his unauthorized, unscheduled, transit to find Sunset Shimmer.)

Fluttershy

"So, you want to know how to make an alicorn? Well, first you get a mare from each of the three tribes together, and then - "

The following conversation was highly disturbing, and as a result, the investigator DOES NOT wish to record who he was speaking with, as he is currently searching for brain bleach.

Berry Punch

Diamond Tiara

Lyra Heartstrings

The Doctor, AKA Doctor Whooves, AKA Dr Hooves, AKA Time Turner

Sunburst

Thorax

Gilda

Buffalo

Spike

Luna

Celestia