“What’s a ‘Coronavirus,’ Scott?”

I looked up from my cereal across the dinner table, and munched casually. “Well,” I started, and swallowed, “have you noticed how I haven’t exactly been going to work? I’ve just been here with you.”

She blinked. “Oh, I thought you were just a bum that leeches off the government.”

I frowned. Dumb capitalist horse. “No, no, believe me if I didn’t have a job, welfare wouldn’t get me a house this nice. It’d get me a dingy and some paddles to try and make my way upstream in a riptide.”

“Aren’t riptides like an ocean thing? Because the moon and the Earth’s tilt?”

I cocked my head, now the puzzled one. “Wait when I tried to explain this the other day—”

“I much prefer Bill Nye, he showed me on Youtube.”

“Who doesn’t prefer Bill Nye?” I countered. “Wait, if you know about Youtube, why are you asking me to explain Covid instead of it?”

She shrugged, taking a bite of her wheaties, pondering the delightful crunch and the idea proposed to her. “I could do that, but I wanted to spend some time with my dear friend, Scottie—”

“The IPad I gave you is dead, isn’t it?”

“It’s charging, and I’m impatient, okay?” She huffed, rubbing her temples in circular motions. “Spill the beans okay, I want to know what it is!”

I took another bite and chewed slowly. Very slowly. It was entertaining as her eyes narrowed with every bite. Satisfied, but not daring enough to test Cadance any further, I cleared my throat. “It’s a disease that’s basically killing a sizable portion of the world and nearly every country is affected by it. It’s extremely contagious and widespread, so the world has pretty much gone on lockdown until we can come up with a vaccine that will supposedly make our bodies more protected from the virus and allow us to go back to our normal, mostly healthy lives.”

She nodded. “That doesn’t sound too fun.”

“No, not at all, it sucks. I’m not a science guy, so check anything I said, but basically we’re practicing things like wearing masks and standing far apart to prevent respiratory transfer of germs.”

“Oh is that why you wore that face cover when you went out for groceries?” Cadance asked.

“Mhm, you’re right.” I finished the last of my cereal, and slurped the remaining milk from the bowl. I wasn’t sure how exactly that looked to her, but she didn’t snark at me, so I guess that was a positive.

Well, she didn’t snark at me about that.

“See.” She suppressed a snicker. “I thought you put on the mask so people wouldn’t make fun of you for being ugly.”

I chewed my lip.

“I’m kidding!” she jeered, unleashing a shrill laugh as soon as my face fell. “Well, mostly.”

“Cadance—”

“Okay, fully, don’t be so insecure.”

I picked up my bowl and headed towards the sink to wash it out.

“Hey, wait, so another question,” she mentioned.

“Shoot.”

“Why do some people say the Coronavirus is a hoax then?”

I paused in my tracks.

“... Who says that?”

“The people on the news said the Tangerine with the Toupee said it.”

I peered over my shoulder, unimpressed. “Which news station?”

“CNN, I think it was called. With like, red letters and a red background.”

“Yup, that’s CNN.” I confirmed, placing my dishes in the sink. “I’m kind of critical of the toupee’d tangerines handling of the whole thing. I think it’s underwhelming, but I don’t think he’s recently said it’s a ‘hoax,’ verbatim.”

“Well the other station said the Tangerine was right, and it was a glorified flu and people who collect their government checks are bums.” She smiled. “Are they right about you? Are you a bum?”

I groaned, and rolled my eyes. “Hardly.” I pinched the bridge of my nose and crouched down to be eye to eye with Cadance. “Where’d you hear that one?”

“Uh…” She tapped the underside of her chin. “It was called Fox.”

“Okay, so the News lies to you.”

Cadance’s eyes bulged in shock. “What? Why would they do that. How else will people know what’s going on in the world?”

“See, in America, news ratings and pandering to what people believe in is more important than accurate information. So CNN panders to one side, and Fox to another side.”

“What about the weatherman? Does he tell the truth?”

“No the weather man is a dirty lying piece of shit and should never be trusted, particularly on your sister’s wedding day when he says it’s the sunniest day of the year.” I felt my hands curl into fists, and reminded myself ‘Live from Channel Five Larry Smith’ would be judged in the ninth pit of Dante’s Inferno one day. Patience is a virtue, after all.

Cadance frowned and crossed her fore legs on the dining room chair. “Well then where do you get truthful news?”

“Oh it’s everywhere,” I said, patting her on the head. “It’s everywhere, you just need to read source content, and read articles online and check cited sources. Those that do their due diligence are rewarded with the Truth.”

She rubbed her chin. “I guess that makes sense, but I would have assumed truth was a readily available commodity in a prospering state.”

“Aren’t you a ruler of an Empire?” I inquired.

“Indeed I am, and don’t you worry!” she cheered, grin stretched ear to ear across her muzzle. “I will take what I’ve learned here on Earth and apply it to my politics back in Equestria!”

I sighed, and hung my head. “Those poor souls…”

Author's Note

I've been busy moving, but finally have internet, even if it's not good.

Love Aminé so much.

God Bless!