EQG Parodies: Why Do I Have ta Be Ev'ryone's Mom?!?

     Inside the shoe house, the old woman was stressed from the amount of kids to discipline and take care of. "Oh gracious me," she said, "I definitely need to get away from these youngins for me to have a chance to relax!" She went over to the fridge, and got the phone number to the Apples' home. "And I know just who to call for help."

     Meanwhile at the Apples' home, Applejack, Applebloom, Big Mac and Granny Smith were doing some of their usual works. About an hour after their works were done for the day, the phone started to ring. Applejack went over to it and answered it.

     "Howdy, this is Applejack what can I do ya for? ...... Huh?!? ....... Ya want me ta-- ...... I-I-I ain't ready fer th-- ...... Alrighty. I'll be right over."

     She hung it up. Before Applebloom could ask a question, Applejack got into her truck, turned on her GPS on her phone and drove away. While she was driving, the GPS voice on her phone told her the directions to the shoe house. After a long drive, she parked her truck beside the shoe house and got out. She saw a bunch of little kids playing on the shoe house and was mind-blown about the quantity of the kids. She climbed the stairs and knocked on the door. She waited until the sweet old woman answered it.

     "Oh hello!" the old woman said, "Come right inside, my dear!" She and Applejack went inside of the shoe house.

     Applejack was amazed by the home setting. She hadn't been inside of a shoe house before in her entire life! "It looks a lot like MY house!" she said, "But in a different form, that is."

     The old woman giggled a little bit. "So it does, doesn't it?" She gave Applejack the everyday procedure, went ahead and grabbed her stuff with her and placed them inside the trunk of her old fashioned car. Then she got into the driver side of it and turned to Applejack. "I'll be going to stay at my sister's house for about either two or four months, just for the sake of my humanity," she said while she then started the engine, "So I need you to watch over and take care of those little youngins while I'm gone. Toodle loo, dearie!" And with that, she drove off.

     Applejack waved goodbye to the old woman who just left the shoe house. Now that she was left alone with a bunch of little kids having fun and nicely playing with each other. While they were doing that, she went over the procedure the old woman gave her. It seemed simple, but was it as simple as it seemed to be? When the sun was started to go down, Applejack went to the kitchen of the shoe house, grabbed the old woman's favorite grits recipe and followed it while she was beginning to cook. She looked at her handy watch and knew that it was time to go inside. She finished cooking the grits and poured them into each bowl for each kid and for herself as well. She placed the spoons beside the bowls on the napkins, grabbed the bell hanging next to the door, went outside and rang it. "Time ta go in, sugarcubes!" she called while ringing, "Supper's ready!"

     The kids heard the bell and her voice calling to them, so they ran inside the shoe house in a snap.

     "Dang," said Applejack, "That was fast. No matter, let's get to the table." She took them to the table with the grits lined up across. When the kids saw what's on the table, they were disgusted. "C'mon, they ain't that bad are they?" she assured them kindly as she sat down on the chair at the end.

     A few minutes later, she was busy eating and caught one kid who was about to fake eat it. "Don't ya dare waste that," she said with a stern look on her face, "I can tell that ya don't like 'em, but I have ta follow the procedures. Sorry sugarcube."

     The same kid was kind of mad but mostly disappointed.

     "I know how ya feel," said Applejack, "When I was yer age, I didn't like 'em either. As I grew a little older, my taste buds changed when I had 'em again. That's why and how I like 'em ever since. When you grow older, yer taste buds might change at least a lil' bit."

     The rest of the kids heard her saying her true story. They were confused about her past tastes on the grits, and didn't know that she didn't like them either. Somehow they found it as an inspiration and started to really eat their grits, including the kid Applejack was talking to. Applejack was surprisingly confused. She definitely did NOT see that coming.

     After the hygienic doings with the kids, night came and Applejack placed them in their beds. She rocked them to sleep by using the old woman's rocking chair that had the materials to rock all of the cradles, and singing a lullaby she knew. Then she silently crept up to the old woman's room.

     When she was about to change into her pajamas, she heard a short fanfare from a trumpet downstairs. She wondered where it was coming from so she went downstairs and investigated to see if there's a trumpet around here. Then Applejack saw something shiny under one pillow of one cradle, so she slowly took it out from it without waking up a kid. She knew it was a trumpet. She crept back upstairs to the room and placed it someplace safe. She changed into her pajamas and got into her bed. She only slept about fifteen minutes and woke up when the music started to play from downstairs. Applejack heard a song she was familiar with. Even though the procedure said that no music should be playing during the night, she thought that the old woman might not want the music to play while getting some sleep. Perhaps a little musical fun with the kids won't hurt. She didn't pack her bass, so she grabbed the trumpet from where she found it, went partially downstairs with a smile and started trying to play it.

     The kids stopped playing and heard Applejack trying to play the trumpet. She was having a little trouble trying to play it musically. She's not much of a trumpeter, so she was traded with a harmonica. That she could definitely play. She started to play the harmonica and she was having a blast.

     A few hours later, she stopped playing but the music didn't. She tried yelling at them to stop, but the only response she got was a pillow thrown to her face. She tried whistling very loudly to get their attention and guess what: same exact response. She tried many times to tell them to stop the music but kept getting pillows thrown to her face. Then she got to the point that she was getting steamed up with anger. Now she was angry enough to probably punch a pillow or tear something up with great amount of force.

     The pillow feathers were flying everywhere and Applejack stormed off to get the caster oil. The kids immediately stopped playing when they saw her carrying the caster oil with a spoon. "I've had it," she said with a raised voice, "I tried my best ta be patient with y'all! I don't get why y'all would act like wild animals! Just b'cuz of that, y'all gonna have some caster oil!"

     The kids suddenly became scared and hid under their covers. Applejack did nothing but sighed heavily in frustration. "Why do I have ta be ev'ryone's mom?" she asked to herself as she went upstairs to the room and slept the night away.

     The next morning, Applejack woke up, went downstairs and started cleaning up the feathers on the floor, and everywhere else inside the shoe house. Still feeling stressed with anxiety from last night, she sat down on the couch and tried to relax to calm herself down.

     One of the kids who wasn't participating in the musical chaos last night walked up to her. "Are you okay?" that kid asked, "What happened?"

     Applejack then cried because of her struggle with so many kids. "It's a long story, sugarcube," she said, "I don't get why those kids would act like wild animals after I tried ta rock 'em ta sleep."

     The kid hugged her in comfort, trying to see her smile again. Then she started to smile a little bit and hugged that kid back.

     Three months later, Applejack had been using some clever strategies to trick the kids into obeying her in a safe way. On the last day of the third month, she heard the knock on the door. She just got finished cleaning up the shoe house and cooking her favorite apple fritters. Just in time to answer it. There in front of her was the old woman who just came back from her sister's house.

     "Hello, Applejack dear!" she said, "How are the youngins while I was gone?"

     "Well it was a struggle," replied Applejack, "But I've learned a few strategies ta trick 'em into b'havin'. Don't worry though, I promise ya that it's not that harmful."

     "Really?" asked the old woman, "How did you do it?"

     Applejack smiled. "I'm glad ya asked," she said, "I'll show ya." She demonstrated some of them she just learned. To the old woman's surprise, they actually worked.

     After the unloading, the old woman thanked her for babysitting the kids and waved goodbye. Applejack loaded her suitcase full of clothing into her truck, got into the driver side of her truck, started the engine and drove away back to her house.

     Meanwhile, Applebloom was sad the whole time because she missed her, and Big Mac was busy helping Granny with some things. Just then, they heard a vehicle coming close from the driveway and the stopping of the engine. Could that be Applejack? Maybe Sunflower and Babs Seed? Only one way to find out!

     Applebloom went outside and saw only the truck with the suitcase. Coming out from the driver side of it was Applejack. Applebloom got very excited.

     "Applejack!!!" she exclaimed as she ran to her and hugged her tightly, "I've been missin' ya the whole time!"

     "Me too, sugarcube," said Applejack as she took down her suitcase from her truck, "Very much."

     Later in the evening, the four Apples were inside the living room. The three of them were listening to Applejack's whole babysitting story. Being a babysitter was tough for her, but she learned that she had to use a little kindness and a lot of patience when dealing with a bunch of kids. The next time she'll be needed for babysitting the kids again, she'll be ready to use these two kinds of traits and hopefully turn out a lot better.