Angst

Flitter woke up with a choked scream in her throat, her mind clouded, terrified and disgusted, and the feeling of sweaty sheets sticking to her onto her coat.

Panting and with her heart beating very fast, she looked around her, but all she saw was her wardrobe and her desk shrouded in the early morning’s light.

“I-it was just a nightmare… a very bad nightmare.” as she said so, her breath slowed down considerably along with her heartbeat. “Nothing really happened, he’s just fine and I went nowhere near to…”

She paused, cringing and clenching her right hoof against her chest, grinding her teeth a little, feeling a sharp cramp of disgust pushing back the crawling desire the nightmare inspired inside her.

“I can’t do that… I’m not the kind of pony that’d do that willy-nilly…. I mean, I don’t think so and I pray Celestia I may never test it.” She muttered to herself, as she carefully pushed the wet covers away, shuddering each time her moist coat pressing against her skin was hit by gusts of cold air, until she was full uncovered, the fresh air mercifully relieving her of the feeling of sweat. She stared at the ceiling above her for a bit, before she decided to get off her bed and go take a shower.

As she walked with careful steps through the corridor that lead straight to the bathroom, she noticed a little shape skittering around in the morning’s half-light.

“He’s awake… already?” she muttered to herself, stopping to look at him getting to the bathroom. “I would’ve thought he’d sleep much more than six hours, but I guess he didn’t feel that tired last night after all.”

She resumed walking, just as Wooden Plow closed the lavatory’s door behind him. Flitter looked absently-minded at the door, her mind elsewhere.

“Should I let him touch me?” she looked down at the pink carpet-floor. “I mean, I know what could happen at any time… and yet… does it matter, if he doesn’t know, if I don’t go too low?”

She shook her head and sighed.

“No, it doesn’t matter, not to you, not to you, not to anyone, knowing or otherwise.” She said, as the door opened, revealing Wooden Plow, his hooves still a bit wet and his messy green and red mane in its usual condiction.

“Good morning Woody.” she said, and he immediately looked up at her smiling.

“Good day cuz!” he said as he hopped in place “I had an awesome dream! It had me and you and mommy…”

Flitter sighed and tremblingly set her hoof on his head, ruffling his mane as he kept rambling on about last night’s dream.

“Good thing you don’t know me very well yet, lil’ cousin,” she thought, feeling a weight on her chest falling off. “You’d be scared of me if you did…”