Author's Note

I recently rewatched 'Swarm of the Century' and it really struck me odd that Twilight just accepted the parasprite without wondering how, why, and if it could be dangerous. By all accounts, the Everfree is full of dangerous things that nopony understands.

I dunno. This was just fun. And, as it turns out Marjoram, Spike, and Twilight all giggle like idiots when they're super stressed.

Parasprite Conundrum

“What in the hell is that?” Marjoram asked flatly, tired eyes staring at the little insect nestling in Twilight’s mane.

“Fluttershy found it! Isn’t it cute!?”

“That doesn’t answer the question, does it?”

“Look at it! It’s got the cutest, round eyes, and look at it’s wings! They’re so oddly shaped, same with the body. This little guy shouldn’t really fly like it does, and it clearly tucks its wings somewhere when it curls up like this!”

Marjoram stared, taking a long pull from his coffee pot, “I don’t suppose you’ll let me examine one?”

“Not while it’s alive! It’s a pet, no matter how weird!”

“I give it maybe a day before you try to figure this thing out.”

“Hey!”

“It’s too weird a mystery. Did you girls ask anypony what this was?”

“Pinkie acted weird but she usually does. She said something about...paraspit? Parasprite? Something like that. She was just being Pinkie.”

“Are you certain? You know Pinkie has more to her than what she seems. Have you noticed anything odd?”

“Well, they’re multiplying at an extraordinary rate. Fluttershy said she found one, and when she saw Pinkie and I she had three.”

Marjoram set his coffee mug down and sighed, “That’s not good. Why, why did you take one?”

“They’re so cute! How can you say no to this cute little face!”

The insect in question let out a petite chirp, nestling deeper into Twilight’s mane.

“What does it eat?”

“Fluttershy didn’t say.”

“Did she mention where she found it?” Marjoram rubbed at his head like he was trying to ease a mounting headache.

“Near the forest while she was gathering flowers for the Princess’s get together.”

“Edge of the Everfree, then. Probably from there then. Not good.”

“Why!?”

“Don’t you mares know anything about unsettled zones!?”

Twilight blinked, then glared, “I’m from Canterlot.”

“So am I! And this is the edge of the settled zone! There are signs all along the edge of the forest warning ponies away from dangerous creatures!”

“How can something so cute be dangerous!”

“Ponies used to think Timberwolves were cute! Want to know how many died because of stupid accidents!?”

“These aren’t Timberwolves!”

“How do you know this won’t become the next thing that kills the next bunch of foolish ponies!?”

“Hey!”

“You’re the genius who took the damned thing! Here, give it to me. I’ll take it to Zecora. If Fluttershy didn’t know what it is, and if I haven’t read about it in the guide to the Everfree, she’s our next best bet.”

Twilight frowned, but nodded. Using her magic gently, she transferred the insect to Marjoram’s mane, where it burrowed in comfortably. Marjoram shuddered at the sensation.

“I’ll keep cleaning the library, then,” Twilight smiled.

Marjoram nodded, forgoing his cloak, and left the library. Walking briskly in the pleasant breeze wasn’t too taxing, though if this sort of thing happened too often...Marjoram did not savour the thought of trying to get to Zecora’s in the middle of winter, though he wouldn’t hesitate if it were needed.

Trying to keep his breathing steady, Marjoram made good time. Knocking on the door, he waited for Zecora to answer. Moments later, Zecora appeared, a smile appearing on her face when she realized who her visitor was.

“I did not expect a friend this day, tell me, is everything okay?”

“Not really, Zecora. Fluttershy found this,” Marjoram pulled the insect from his mane to show her, “Near the edge of the Everfree. Now it seems like everypony has one, though no one knows what they are. I hoped you’d know.”

At the sight of the insect, Zecora’s eyes widened and her ears flew back, “Oh no, a monster of little size. This is a parasprite before my eyes!”

“Are they dangerous? Should I be worried?”

“Tales of crops and harvests consumed. If these are in Ponyville...you’re doomed.”

“There’s nothing we can do!?”

Zecora shook her head sadly, “Nothing to my knowledge, my friend. They may even bring Ponyville’s end.”

“I don’t believe this. Thank you for telling me, Zecora. I’ve got to head back to warn everypony!” Turning on the spot, Marjoram grasped the parasprite with his magic before galloping away. He got several meters away from Zecora’s still open door before she heard the sound of him coughing.

Zecora sighed, and shut the door. Looking about her cabin, she began to pack. Perhaps, getting out of Ponyville with her own foodstuffs intact would be good. Especially before desperate ponies came. She’d give them a day before things devolved seriously. She’d check on the village before leaving, just in case, but otherwise it was best to be prepared.

Galloping into Ponyville, sweat pouring off of him, and barely breathing, Marjoram didn’t even register the looks of panic on the residents as he passed them. A small part of his brain registered that it probably looked like he was running from a dangerous animal. The same part of him also laughed internally.

Throwing the door of the library open revealed a curious scene. Dozens of parasprite were covering every available surface, even clinging to the ceiling and bookshelves. Twilight and Spike were desperately trying to get the parasprites out of the open window, but were having limited success.

Trembling, out of breath, and not sure if he should laugh or cry, Marjoram crumpled to the wooden floor, heaving with laughter and coughing. Twilight and Spike froze mid-motion, sharing confused looks that quickly turned to concern.

“What did Zecora say!?”

“We’re...doomed,” Marjoram managed to wheeze, still choking back laughter.

“Why are you laughing!?” Twilight squeaked.

“It’s either that or cry!” Spike interjected, “What do we do!?”

Marjoram nearly jumped out of his skin when Pinkie materialized beside him.

“We need a triangle!”

“A what?” Twilight, Spike, and Marjoram said in unison.

“A triangle! You know, the thing you play!” Pinkie mimed hitting a triangle.

Twilight and Marjoram shared a look, and Twilight looked sheepish, “Do you know how to stop them?”

“I need to get as many instruments as possible. If we play them, we can lead them right out of town!”

“How do you know this? This isn’t in any of the books!”

“Zecora didn’t...know either.”

“I lived in a really isolated rock farm! What food we could get, we needed. It was passed down through the generations of the Pie family!”

“Huh,” Spike nodded appreciatively, “That’s kinda cool.”

“Granny Pie was the best!” Pinkie agreed, “Now, can somepony help me-”

“What do you have?”

“Just about everything I need! I just need something with pizzaz!”

Marjoram, who still hadn’t picked himself off of the ground, shook with renewed laughter, “Where in the hell...are we supposed to find an instrument...that has enough pizazz...for Pinkie!?”

Twilight blinked, then saw the problem, “I really don’t know.”

Spike, in spite of himself, giggled too. After a second, Twilight’s resolve crumbled as well.

Pinkie blinked at the three of them, “Why are you laughing!?”

Marjoram opened his mouth to reply, but his laughing triggered a coughing fit. Spike was in stitches, leaning against a bookshelf, and Twilight had tears streaming down her cheeks. All of them were unable to answer.

Letting out a short, frustrated squeak, Pinkie ran off. That led to Twilight, Spike, and Marjoram lead into even worse laughter.

Marjoram’s lungs cut the laughter short, forcing Twilight to dose him with the spell that Celestia had taught her.

Wheezing and still chuckling, Marjoram had to force himself to breathe.

“We’re terrible,” Spike managed in between giggles.

“Shock is one...heck of a drug,” Twilight replied, vainly wiping at her eyes.

“We probably...should help,” Marjoram gasped.

“No kidding,” Spike straightened, still chuckling weakly.

“Okay, so I’ll track her down to see if we can’t find the final instrument, can you two try to do damage control?”

Spike and Marjoram shared a look. Marjoram climbed slowly to his feet, moving so Twilight could see the damage, “Little late now.”

“Ah, well can you tell ponies we’re looking for instruments, and for ponies who can play to meet beside the fountain in Town Square?”

“Got it,” Spike mock saluted.

Lips still twitching, Marjoram nodded in agreement.

Assured, Twilight galloped off. Spike and Marjoram shared one last giggle before venturing out into the chaos of the street.