Three Girls, One Battle

by Jay David

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Sonata Dusk, Lemon Zest, Pinkie Pie (EqG), Comedy, Equestria Girls
Length: 1205

Pinkie, Sonata and Lemon have a somewhat "interesting" time together

What happens when a lover of parties, a former world-conquering Siren, and a rocking Crystal Prep girl all get together? They engage in a battle of epic proportions, that’s what!

Part of my EG Continuity

Published 2017-08-13 06:20:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-08-13 06:20:06 UTC

Three Girls, One Battle

Dark clouds had gathered in the skies above, blotting out the sun. The wind was howling fiercely, and on top of everything else, the rains had begun. But this did not deter those who now marched onwards towards their goal. An army, vast beyond imagining, stretching as far back as one could see, was on the move. Men in armour on horseback, rows upon rows of pike-men, archers, siege equipment, all the things one would expect an army of this size to have with it. They seemed unstoppable, fearsome, relentless, and on they marched, proudly, under a pink banner with yellow and blue balloons. But soon, they came to a halt, as their commander raised a hand, causing every one of the thousands of soldiers to stop simultaneously. Their leader, clad in bright blue armour, her poofy hair flowing in the wind, rode forward a few steps on her own horse, narrowing her eyes, before glancing down at said horse.

"So...we're here, Sir Neighs-A-Lot."

Pinkie Pie, Commander of this glorious force, now looked ahead, seeing her goal finally in view. The bare and craggy land they'd been trudging through had given way to a grey and foreboding mountain, and at its peak was a dark tower, stretching high into the heavens. Pinkie frowned to it, but soon looked downwards. For a rider was approaching, bearing far lighter armour than her, with her green hair flowing in the wind, almost like hers in fact, as if also being made to look dramatic and cool. Pinkie nudged her horse, causing the latter to move yet further, ready to meet this newcomer.

"Hail, Lemon Zest! My finest scout!" Pinkie called.

Once beside her, the rider saluted.

"Hail, Commander Pinkie!"

The Commander looked back to the tower.

"What news of our foe?"

Lemon looked back herself.

"It is ill news, my Lady. She is entrenched deep. Her defences are strong, and her monster army is primed for battle."

She frowned.

“Worse still...she’s stocked to the gills with marshmallows and snacks. So a siege won’t be an option.

Pinkie turned to her.

"And our offer? Did the evil Siren seductress accept our demands for surrender?"

Lemon sighed.

"No, my Lady."

Pinkie raised an eyebrow.

"Why not?"

Lemon shrugged her shoulders.

"She seduced me."

Hearing that, Pinkie clenched her armoured hand into a fist.

"Curses! How could we have possibly seen that coming?!"

Lemon nodded in agreement, but didn't say anything as Pinkie looked to her once more.

"Did you at least try to seduce her back?"

The other teen shook her head.

"Couldn't. My charm points aren't high enough."

Pinkie sighed, shaking her own head.

"Of course. It's always the way, isn't it?"

But then Lemon soon spoke up again.

"So...do we begin the battle?"

Pinkie considered that long and hard, only to be stopped when, across the wind she could hear unmistakeably evil laughter.

"It's her!"

Lemon turned, and saw that, sure enough, the blue Siren Sorceress was indeed atop the tower, dressed in a flowing purple robe and looking down at the opposing army with amusement.

"Muahahahaha! Fools! No matter who you send, my magic is invincible! Muahahahaha! Also, could we maybe get this over quick, coz I’m kinda in the middle of my snacks here."

Enraged, Pinkie drew her sword, turning her horse around, and addressing her army.

"Men! And possibly also women! Sorry, but I can’t really see through your helmets to tell! Anyway, we stand here today before the gates of evil itself!"

She started having her horse pace up and down the front ranks.

"Within that tower is a creature that we must defeat at all costs! Some of you may die..."

Then she considered that.

"...in fact...most of you will die. That’s sort of how these things go. Big fight, all hope is lost, that sort of thing. But fear not! Because if you die in this great cause, then know this..."

She started to smirk.

"...it'll at least be really, really cool to watch!"

Lemon smirked herself, folding her arms and nodding in agreement.

"Amen to that, sister!"

Turning, Pinkie aimed her sword towards the tower.

"Charge, my balloon army! Charge! And may victory be as sweet as my Mom’s best cookies!"

And with that, charge they did. A call of shouts and screams and battle cries echoed out across their environment as thousands upon thousands of men ran forward as fast as they could, with Pinkie and Lemon at their head. On and on they moved, a mighty host ready to strike at their foe. In the midst of the charge, however, Lemon let go of the reins of her horse and unsheathed a pair of daggers, twirling them expertly in her hands, much to her own amusement. But Pinkie soon noticed.

"Why are you using two daggers for this?"

Lemon rolled her eyes.

"Because you gotta have someone wielding dual daggers in a fight like this! It's tradition!"

Pinkie considered that, and in spite of being on a running horse, shrugged her shoulders, before getting back to the important business of shouting as she charged. As for Sonata, she let out yet another stereotypical evil laugh.

"Muahahahaha! Go, my evil army! Take no prisoners!"

She paused, thinking on those words.

"Unless they're cute! Then you can take prisoners!"

As commanded, monsters began swarming from every door and window in the tower. Centaurs, hydras, big flying bat things, even a dragon overhead. It was truly a sight to behold, as the army of Pinkie drew ever nearer to their monstrous enemies, who growled and snorted aggressively as they themselves charged. Closer and closer they approached, with all combatants readying their swords or claws. Only a few steps away now, and Pinkie, leading the charge, drew up her sword, and...

"Bam! I cut a centaur’s head clean off! Whoosh!"

Pinkie excitedly made her sword-swinging noises as she sat at the table, with Lemon and Sonata watching her from their respective seats. Once she was done, she looked down at the board in the centre of the table, with all the little drawings and figurines upon it, before taking hold of a pair of dice that were laying there.

"Whose turn is it?"

Sonata reached out her hand eagerly.

"Me!"

Pinkie graciously handed them over, and it wasn't long before Sonata shook them in her hand and rolled them. All eyes were on it, and soon, they saw the number.

"Twelve! Yes!" Sonata exclaimed.

She then looked at the two other girls cockily.

"That means I get to use my lightning! Hope you girls are ready!"

Lemon looked at her with a smile and determination.

"Bring it on, Sorceress!"

The two laughed, only to stop when Pinkie looked to them with a degree of uncertainty.

"Say...are you girls sure this is how the game is supposed to be played?"

Lemon and Sonata looked to one another, then looked back to Pinkie, before the former answered.

"Probably not, but it is more fun this way."

Pinkie considered that, then broke out into a smile.

"Can't argue with that. So..."

She looked back at the board.

"...where were we? Ah, yes! I'm about to be struck with lightning! Neat!"