Just One Drink

by BudCharles

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Trixie, Comedy, Derpy Hooves, Sex, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 1424

Trixie takes Twilight to a bar. It doesn't go as planned.

Trixie takes Twilight to a bar. It doesn't go as planned. Meanwhile, Derpy tries working two jobs.

(Yeah so I said I'd be away for a while, and I will, but I couldn't leave this idea unwritten xD I'm worried that my style didn't do it justice but hopefully that's just me being nervous for no good reason xD)

Published 2017-04-13 05:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-04-13 05:10:01 UTC

Best Mistake Ever

Twilight froze in place outside The Dizzy Weasel.

Trixie rolled her eyes, and grabbed the princess's hoof, dragging her towards the door of the establishment.

Twilight kicked and struggled with her back hooves, creating a trail of dust behind them.

"WAIT! I don't want to go anymore! I don't know how Starlight talked me into this", Twilight protested, beginning to hyperventilate.

"It'll be fine! It's just a bar, what's the worst that can happen?"

"I could get drunk, and then say something offensive, and then start an uprising against all of Equestria!"

Trixie let go of Twilight's hoof and stared in stunned silence.

"Okay, note to self, never ask that question around Twilight again."

"I'm sorry," Twilight said softly, regaining control, "I may have... overreacted... slightly."

"You think?"

"Can we just - start this whole thing over?"

"Has this ever happened in a diplomatic meeting, princess?"

"Once... with the dragon lord... it went about as well as you'd expect."

"HAH!"

The bar was packed. Everyone was there - Mayor Mare, Vinyl Scratch, Berry Punch (of course).

The smell of cider filled the air, and the loud chatter and thumping vibrations of the music seemed to shake the two ponies as they entered.

Twilight tensed up. Trixie rolled her eyes, and shielded Twilight from the crowds, guiding her to a quiet table in the corner.

"This isn't so bad, is it?" the show mare tried to reassure Twilight.

"I... guess not" Twilight answered, faking a smile, her twitching ear giving her true thought away.

"Hah! Trixie -"

"Hi!", the waiter interrupted.

She was a grey mare, with wall eyes. Twilight recognised her immediately.

"Oh sorry, did I interrupt? I do that a lot. Would you like a complimentary muffin to make up for-"

"We're fine", Twilight answered, appreciating the distraction.

"Okay then, uh, would you like to order drinks?"

"Which one has the lowest alcohol conte-mmph!"

Trixie, one hoof stuffed in Twilight's mouth, answered.

"Two Manehattans, please."

"Certainly, sir - ah! Madame! I'm so sorry!"

The flustered waiter rushed away in panic.

Trixie pulled her hoof away from Twilight and shook it in mock disgust.

The waiter returned, nervously balancing the two drinks on a tray in one of her front hooves.

She carefully lowered the shaky tray to the table. Trixie and Twilight magically lifted their drinks away, and the wall-eyed waiter jumped with excitement.

Trixie shot a look of confusion at her.

"Oh! Sorry, that wasn't very professional. It's my first time."

"You're making a great first impression" Trixie replied sarcastically.

"Trixie!" Twilight scolded, "I thought you were over that!"

"Lighten up, Sparkle, I'm just teasing!"

Derpy chuckled nervously and began backing away. Twilight magically floated a large tip into Derpy's pocket.

"Sparkle!" Trixie called out.

"Ah!" Twilight said in reply, almost spilling her drink all over herself before catching it again with her magic.

"See who can drink the fastest!"

"I don't know if that's such a good idea."

"Oh come on, it's just one tiny glass."

"Is it like apple cider?"

"Hah! It's a lot stronger than cider!"

Twilight's eyes widened and she floated the drink away from her muzzle.

"I mean... uh... it's just the same as cider. Trixie was... only teasing! Yes! That's it."

Twilight closed her eyes, and took a tiny sip.

"How was i-"

Twilight started coughing like an asthmatic timberwolf.

Trixie snorted, trying to hold back laughter.

"It's not funny!" Twilight gasped, tiny tears in the corners of her eyes, as she finally finished coughing.

Trixie proceeded to down her entire cocktail in one movement, staring at Twilight with a smug smirk the whole way through.

"See, easy!"

Twilight cringed at her drink, slowly edging it towards her face a second time.

"Come on Twi, it's just one drink, it won't hurt!"

Trixie dived to catch Twilight as she toppled backwards of her chair.

"Twilight?"

Twilight was blushing furiously as Trixie helped her up onto all fours. The princess proceeded to collapse again immediately.

"You've got to be kidding. It was just one drink!"

"Trixie?" Twilight slurred.

Trixie braced herself, and let out a sigh.

"Yes, Sparkle?"

"You're pretty."

"Well, your eyesight's still working!" Trixie teased.

"No really, you're HOT!"

A few nearby ponies turned to watch the unfolding scene.

Trixie tried to edge away, towards the counter.

"I LOVE YOU TRIXIE!" Twilight yelled at the top of her voice, before letting out a hiccup.

The music suddenly stopped, and the entire bar turned towards Trixie's table.

"Oookay, we're leaving now. Bye everypony!"

Trixie lifted Twilight's limp form onto her back, hastily floated the money for the drinks to the counter, and darted out of the bar.

Twilight woke up in her castle bed. The light almost blinded her.

"Spike! Tell Celestia to turn down the sun!" she called out.

It was at that moment Twilight realised she had the mother of all headaches. She let out a whimper and turned to her alarm clock - 2 in the afternoon!

"Ohmygoshohmygosh! I have to get to-"

"Relax, it's Saturday", a familiar voice reassured her. She turned to see Trixie standing over her bed

"Trixie? How'd you get here?"

"Last night, remember? We went to The Dizzy Weasel? You got completely sloshed?"

A look of sheer panic took hold of Twilight's face.

"Oh no! What have I done? Have I started an uprising?"

Trixie snorted. "Relax, Sparkle, it wasn't that bad. You just made a few... inappropriate comments."

"Oh no. What did I say?"

"Really, it wasn't that-"

"What did I say!"

"Okay, settle, Sparkle. You... uh. You said that Trixie was hot, and that you loved her."

"Oh Celestia."

"And then on the way home, you listed all the things you'd do with her in -"

"Alright, alright, I get the picture!"

Trixie smiled, once again trying not to break out laughing.

"I can't believe it," Twilight groaned, "Starlight is in so much trouble when she gets back!"

"Don't take it out on Starlight."

"You're right, it's my fault, I shouldn't have-"

"Sparkle, it's nopony's fault, take a chill pill."

Twilight sighed, and the two ponies stayed silent for a moment.

"Sooo...." Trixie interrupted. "Was any of that stuff you said... uh... true?"

Twilight blushed involuntarily, and said nothing.

"Why didn't you tell Trixie sooner?"

"There wouldn't be any point."

Trixie laughed. "What do you mean there wouldn't be any point?"

"I'm a nerdy politician, and you're a charismatic show pony, of course you wouldn't be into -"

Trixie leaned over and kissed Twilight. The stunned princess's face went totally red, and her wings unfolded suddenly.

"Hah! Changed your mind now, Sparkle?"

"Wha-? I mean how? I mean what?" Twilight said in shock as Trixie released her from the kiss.

Trixie laughed playfully.

"I thought you hated me" Twilight added. "I mean you were always trying to beat me at everything."

"Because I was jealous, Sparkle. I was jealous of the way you were so - powerful, and intelligent, and how you'd be able to earn everything you ever wanted, but I'd never be able to earn you."

Twilight's heart skipped a beat.

"Trixie, I never knew. I - I thought you wanted nothing to do with me. I'm sorry."

Trixie placed a hoof on Twilight's lips.

"Enough sulking and apologising, Sparkle. Let's have some fun."

"Already?"

"No! Not that type of fun! I meant go practice magic or something - not - not that!"

Twilight snorted, and the two mares burst out laughing. Last night was the best mistake ever.

The wall-eyed waiter stepped quietly into the manager's office, her head down and her ears back.

The manager, a stallion with a fancy suit and a large, imposing desk, gestured for her to take a seat.

"You know why you're here, I presume."

"Yes, sir. Sorry."

"You broke twelve glasses last night. The only way we can afford to replace them is if we... well... relieve you of your duties."

"No! Please, I'll make it up to you. I really need the money, it's Dinky's birthday soon and the delivery job just isn't enough to -"

"I'm aware of your situation, Miss Hooves, but there's nothing I can do. I wish you luck."

The waiter sighed, and left the office.

'What kind of a mother am I?', she thought to herself.

She checked her pocket - there had to be some mistake. It was overflowing with bits! More than enough for Dinky's present.

She raced out of the building, and face first into a lamp post.