Crazy Clothesless Capers Teleporting for Two

by Ajustice90

Rating: mature
Tags: Twilight Sparkle (EqG), Dean Cadance, Comedy, Equestria Girls, Sex, Sunset Shimmer, Random, Shining Armor
Length: 3714

Cadance and Shining Armor go from trying ot make love to making a run for it.

Cadance ends up taking an experimental teleporter Twilight's been working that just happens to look like a ring to let Shining Armor know she whats some alone time with him. While doing so they unintentionally end up teleporting around town with the humorous result.

Meanwhile Sunset ends reliving memories that start giving her certain urges.

Published 2017-05-01 04:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-05-01 04:30:01 UTC

Chapter 1

It was a nice Summer afternoon, with a bright Sun and cool breeze it seemed like the perfect day to get out. Unless you’re named Twilight Sparkle that is: Said girl was in the basement of the house she shared with her brother Shining Armor, and his wife/Twilight’s former babysitter/Dean of Crystal Prep Cadance where she would build inventions and perform experiments. She was working on a few small devices, namely what appeared to be a silver ring with a red sphere on it. Twilight was working on the circuitry within the red sphere, looking through a magnifying glass to make sure she could see each inner part.

“Alright looks good.” Twilight said as worked her work and closed the sphere. “I need to-”

“Twilight!”

“AAAHHH!!!” She surprised and flinged her ring into the air.

The opened door and Cadance came inside. “Twilight, are you okay?”

“I was until you called my name!” Twilight replied with groan.

“Oh sorry. I didn’t think you’d be so into your work today, since you had plans and-”

“Wait I had plans?” Twilight asked and pieces in her mind came together. “Oh no! I forgot I had stuff with the girls today!” She looked at her clock. “They’re supposed to be here in ten minutes! I gotta get ready. Twilight jumped out of her chair and ran up the stairs.

Cadance sighed and playfully shook her head as she watched Twilight run. “Oh boy, I can’t imagine how she’ll be in college soon.” She was about to leave when something caught in the corner of her eye. “Is that?” She kneeled down and picked up the ring Twilight was making and gave a big grin. “I finally found it! I must’ve lost there the last I cleaned up.” She put the ring on her finger. “Oh Shiny and I are gonna have a good time today.” She turned off the light and closed the door.

“Twilight! They’re here!” Cadance said as she saw the bus Twilight and her friends now use to get around was parked in front of the house.

“I’m coming!” Twilight replied as she hurried down the stairs in her casual clothes with her backpack in tow.

Cadance opened the door for her sister-in-law.

“Thanks Cadance! I’m be back for dinner.” Twilight said as she reached the door. “Bye Shining!” She called to her brother as she ran out the door and started waving to Cadance. “Bye Cadance!”

“Bye Twilight!” Cadance waved off with her ring hand. As soon as Twilight entered the bus she felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist.

“So you finally found it huh?” Shining Armor playfully asked from behind.

“Indeed.” Cadance with a smirk. She closed the door and turned around so she could embrace her husband as well. “And with Twilight gone we got all the whole day to ourselves.” Cadance brought her face up to Shining’s so they could share a passionate kiss.

“Let’s not waste time then.” Shining replied, picking Cadance up bridal style and and carried her off to their bedroom.

Twilight hurried through the inside of her friends’ bus waving to the others until she reached the backseat where her best friend Sunset Shimmer waiting for her.

“Hey Twilight!” Sunset said.

“Hi Sunset.” Twilight replied as she took her seat and opened her backpack letting her dog Spike come out.

Spike groaned. “I hate it when you run with me in tow.”

“Sorry Spike.” Twilight replied.

“Let guess: You were tinkering in your lab and lost track of time. Again.” Sunset asked.

“Yeah.” Twilight blushed in embarrassment. “But what I’m working on is really good. See I’m building us secret teleporters so if we run into any trouble or dangerous situations we get of there to safety.”

“Really? How will it work?”

“It picks up on elevated heart rates caused by emotions. I still work to make sure it can tell the difference between fear and panic over something like excitement.”

“Sounds interesting. What does look like?”

Twilight took out her phone and showed a picture of the ring.

Sunset’s eyes widen and her face turned red. “Twilight. Did you base this ring on something?”

“Oh. Well I did find inspiration from a ring I’ve seen Cadance wear every now and then, she’s usually in a really good mood when she wears it. Why do you ask?”

“N-Nothing! Just asking.” Sunset lied and turned her head away from Twilight.

Sweet Celestia! She based her teleporter off a Bang Me ring! Sunset thought.

A Bang Me ring as the name implies is worn by a woman when they want sex from their significant other. Sunset would know best as she used one while she dated Flash Sentry: She’d usually wear it at school during her “I run this place” phase as a way to show her dominance over the place by having sex there whenever and wherever she wanted, not caring if others saw her as a slut. Granted she stopped wearing it after their break-up and she regrets the way she acted back then, but she still enjoyed the times she had with Flash while she wore the ring. The guy happened to be really good with his hands, and his tongue, and his 7-inch-

Oh Celestia! Get a hold of yourself! Now’s not the time to remember all the sex you had with Flash! All the really good and thorough sex we had.

Sunset started feeling her pussy get excited as the memories started pouring in.

Nuts!!

“Could you excuse me for second? I gotta ask Applejack something.” Sunset got out of her seat rushed over to the farm girl.

“Hey Sunset. Something up?” Applejack asked seeing the discomfort on her friend’s face.

“I, really need to use your bathroom when we get to the farm. I need to (Ahem) work some stuff out of my system.”

“Oh sure.” Applejack and then came closer to her. “Ya’ll need a magazine or two to help ya out?”

“If ya got any, sure.”

“Yes! Yes!! YES!!!” Cadance cried out as she laid in bed, all of her and Shining’s clothing discarded, with Shining grinding his hips against hers and squeezing her breasts like they were play-doh. “Please Shining, get inside me!” She looked to her husband in pleading.

“Whatever you want!” Shining complied inserting his length into his wife.

Cadance’s breathed heavily as she felt Shining penetrate her and her heart pounded like crazy.

Twilight’s ring then picked up on Cadance’s heart rate and activated and in an instant they disappeared in flash of light.

The two regained their sight after the light went away

“What was that-” Shining stopped as he realized their change of scenery.

“Ah honey?” Cadance nervously called out to her husband.

“Yes?” Shining replied.

“We’re not in our bedroom, are we?”

“No, we seem to be in a yard.”

“And it’s not ours?”

“Uh-huh.”

“So we’re in someone’s backyard completely naked and in a sex position.”

“Speaking all this out loud ain’t making this any better Cadance!”

“Is someone outside?” The naked couple heard from the house they were behind. “I’ll check it out.”

“Run.” Cadance cried out without trying to yell. She and Shining booked it out of yard and didn’t look back.

At the barn in Applejack’s farm most of the group was waiting around for their friend.

“Coming!” Sunset yelled as approached the barn.

“Took ya long enough.” An annoyed Rainbow Dash said.

“Sorry. I, had a bit too much coffee this morning and number one then became number two.”

“Ah don’t worry Sunny! I had ballon animals to keep me busy.” Pinkie said with a bundle of said balloon animals at her feet. She then put an orange one in her mouth and blew into and long balloon.

Sunset unfortunately looked at the balloon and it made her memories came back, again. She bit her lower lip trying to put the thoughts away once more. “Can we get practice started so we can get on with our plans?”

“Sure thing sugarcube!” Applejack as she strapped on her bass and the others get their respective instruments.

After getting out of the first yard Shining Armor and Cadance were running through other yards with Shining having his hands cover his crotch while Cadance used one for hers and while her other arm covered her breasts. They maked sure to stop behind trees or bushes to see ahead and make sure no one would spot them.

They stopped at a set of lawn decorations that thankfully covered their prized possessions. For Cadance it was phoenix that covered her boobs and flower that shielded her lower lips. While Shining had bundle of red gemstones while a pair of dragons were biting on a pair of small gems in front of the main big gem.

Shining at the dragons in discomfort. "Cadance can we trade? I don't trust these guys.”

“Can we focus on just how we ended up outside?” Cadance responded.

“Beats me!”

“Alright, in that case we can figure it out later. Right now we should just focus on getting home and not get caught by anyone.”

“Like that tour bus coming like way?”

“WHAT?!!” Cadance looked ahead to see that indeed a tour bus was approaching the street we were on. “We gotta go!”

The two tried making a break for it but Shining tripped and fell on top of Cadance causing her to fall to the ground. Luckily her balloons softened the landing, unluckily the bus was approaching and the position the two were in was completely humiliating. The thought of getting photos taken of her and Shining and thme ending up on the news caused Cadance’s heart to race, resulting in the ring activating and teleporting them again.

“Wha?” Cadance and Shining were now somewhere indoors.

“Now where are we?” Shining asked.

“Can you get off me first? This floor’s cold!” Cadance asked showing some discomfort.

“Oh sorry.” Shining got off Cadance and helped her up, trying not to stare at Cadance’s now erect nipples. “So like I asking-”

“Oh goodness yes! Someone answered my flier.” The voice called from behind them. They nervously turned to an older woman with peach-colored skin and long curly pink hair with shades of blue at the bottom smiling at them despite being naked. “Oh thank you so much for doing this. After my normal models called in sick I thought I’d have to cancel classes or get up there myself.” Cadance and Shining looked at each in confusion and then back at the woman. “I can see your nervous so this has your first time posing nude of life drawing classes. Take from someone with experience posing nude, it’s actually kind of empowering. Baring yourself in front of up and coming artists, it shows you have nothing to hide about your body.”

Shining was about to say something when Cadance spoke first.

“Why thank you ma’am. Me and my husband are wanting to try new things and we decided to do something really bold.”

“Great! Follow me.”

As the older woman turned around Shining whispered to his wife. “Why are we doing this?”

“Would you rather have people draw your balls and chain or get arrested? I think we both know the answer to that so let’s this over with.” Cadance replied and started to follow the older woman with Shining reluctantly following suit.

They were led to an art classroom and Cadance and Shining were introduced to the class and then gestured to step up on a platform and posed for the class.

Naturally the couple were embarrassed as everyone looked at them in all their glory and drawing it for posterity.

As they went to a different pose they noticed one student in particular that was front of them.

“Doesn’t that girl look like Twilight?” Shining whispered to Cadance.

The girl in question had cream-colored skin with red hair that had purple streaks where part was has held up on the side. Glasses like Twilight’s, though it looked tapped up in the middle. She also wore a large black sweater and pink skirt with matching boots.

“Hold on. I think that’s Twilight old friend Moondancer.” Cadance replied.

“Oh yeah.” He looked at her again. “Is something wrong with her?” Moondancer seemed to be shifting her attention between the two frequently with blushing like crazy.

“Oh I remember. She had a big crush on you when she and Twilight kids.” Cadance replied with with a playful smirk, before her eyes widened and pupils shrank. “And then she a thing for me when she hit puberty.”

The class soon ended with the students leaving and the teacher thanked Cadance and Shining Armor before going herself.

“So, what do we do now?” Shining asked as they had nowhere to go now.

Cadance then spotted Moondance through the window of one of the doors. “Maybe we can ask Moondancer for help. She knows us well enough.”

“Alright.”

They stepped out to approach Twilight’s childhood friend.

“Moondancer!” Cadance called out.

Said young girl flinched and froze.

“It’s, ah, been a while. Look we need some help could you maybe with-”

Moondancer turned, revealing he she holding a water bottle and her mouth was filled up. However seeing Cadance’s melons and Shining banana and cherries caused to her to do a spit take. The couple held their hands to shield themselves, however some of the water got on Cadance’s ring, resulting sparks shooting out and making them teleport again.

Moondancer herself fell to the floor, her face all red, as her hand made it’s way under her skirt.

Cadance and Shining found themselves indoors once more.

“Where are we now?” Shining asked.

“I hope Moondancer’s okay.” Cadance said to herself.

“Alright guys what do you wanna do today?!”

The two turned to the corner to see three guys holding plushies of Mario characters Bowser Jr, Kamek, and a Koopa, having them sit on couch with camera in front of them.

“We could play hockey dude!” The guy holding the Koopa plush said making himself sound like a kid.

“Maybe we could ride on Junior’s rideable Thomas. Ken and I would love to go a train ride. Right Ken?” The Kamek sounding like stereotypical nerd said turning a Ken doll. “Sounds like a romantic time huh?” The Kamek sounded like he was drooling.

The Koopa groaned in frustration. “He’s a doll Cody! He can’t care!”

“Ken does care Joseph!”

“Guys shut up!!” Bowser Jr yelled.

“This is some kind of video for the internet?” Cadance asked as she and Shining watched the guys play the skit. “Who would watch this stuff?”

“I kinda like this.” Shining said.

“You guys hear something?” The guys holding Kamek asked going back his normal voice.

The couple quickly pulled their heads out and ran to find a room to hide in. They ended up in a room with a bunch of props in it. They sat at the sides of the door to avoid getting caught.

“What should we do?” Shining asked. “We can’t get out if they’re around.”

“We might have to take-” Cadance was interrupted by some whining. She looked to see a pair of dogs looking at them. Cadance laughed nervously. “Nice doggies. Please don’t bark. Please.”

The dogs themselves then started licking Cadance’s feet.

“Oh no.” Shining said as he looked at Cadance who was biting her lower lip and had goofy look on her face. “Stop it.” He told the dogs as quietly as he could. “She’s really ticklish here.” He saw Cadance was about to lose it, so he stepped over and covered his wife’s mouth as she started laughing and spooked the dogs.

Cadance’s heart rate picked up again and made her and Shining teleport again.

The two this time found themselves underwater of all things. They swam up as fast as they could until they came up for air. After coughing up any water they swallowed and looked around.

“Are we in middle of the ocean?” Cadance asked.

“Actually better.” Shining replied with smile.

Cadance raised an eyebrow until she saw soon other naked people run past them and looked further to a beach full of nude people. “A nude beach? Okay, I can take it.”

“We might be able to ask someone for some spare clothes and-” Shining stopped been he saw a dorsal fin approaching them. “Shark!”

As the fin started circling them Cadance embraced Shining for safety when she heard some crackling, she looked at her hand and saw her ring sparking electricity. “What the-” And before she could finish asking she and Shining Armor were once again teleported.

The fin came revealing it was young pink girl with purple and white curly hair and appeared to have swirls on her eyes. “Where’d they’d go?”

Cadance and Shining found themselves on their feet again, facing a wooden wall.

“Now-”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Before they could ask where they were, someone spotted them. And the scream sounded awfully familiar.

They turned to see Twilight and her friends shocked and blushing, Twilight herself mortified.

“My eyes! I can never see again!” Twilight yelled as she put her hands over her eyes.

Cadance and Shining quickly covered themselves.

“Oh. Oh dear. This is very awkward.” Rarity said.

“Didn’t see coming.” Rainbow said.

Fluttershy simply covered her mouth.

Sunset’s pressed her legs together as her hormones came back with a vengeance.

“Wow! My horoscope was right!” Pinkie said.

Cadance and Shining shuttled over to some stacks of hay.

“Ah, Twill, I know this must be very uncomfortable for you.” Shining said to try breaking the ice.

“YOU THINK?!!” Twilight yelled. “Why are you two naked? And how did you get here?!!!!”

“We’re not sure why we keep going from place to place Twilight.” Cadance replied. “We jus- AHHH!” Cadance’s ring started sparking again and was hurting her so she slipped it off and dropped it.

Sunset looking at the ring had a good idea what happened. She picked it and brought up Twilight. ”Is this your teleporter Twilight?”

Twilight peeked through her hands. “Yes! Cadance must have mistook this for her real ring.”

“You mean I was wearing teleporter this whole time?” Cadance asked.

“But that doesn’t explain how it activated or the NAKED thing!”

Sunset sighed and put a hand on Twilight’s shoulder. “I didn’t want to tell you this, but that ring you based your teleporter on, it’s actually...” Sunset then whispered into Twilight’s ear that the ring was supposed to be.

Twilight’s pupils dilated and her lower lips trembled at the information Sunset gave her. “S-So I based my teleport off something women wear to have-” Sunset cut Twilight by nodding. “Which means what caused Cadance’s heart rate to activate the teleporter and for them to be naked means they were doing-” Sunset nodded again, resulting in Twilight fainting and Sunset catching her.

Meanwhile the nude couple’s blush reach critical as now Twilight was aware of their activities.

“Well, it could be worse.” Shining said.

“How?!” Cadance angrily replied.

“She could’ve found out by walking in on us.”

Cadance’s anger faded. “Oh yeah, she could’ve.”

“What going on in here?!” The voice of Granny Smith called from outside.

Applejack stepped out to face her grandmother. “Long story Granny. Help me get some clothes and Ah’ll fill ya in.”

A little bit later Cadance and Shining were in back of the Apple family truck, now dressed in hand-me-downs from Applejack’s parents.

“Thanks for clothes Granny Smith. And sorry for trouble.” Cadance said.

“AH say nuthin about! Just make sure you wash them buds and bring em when you can.” Granny replied.

Sunset approached the two. “I think it’s best Twilight spends a few days out of the house. To recover from well…” They looked to Twilight who was rocking back and forth in the fetal position while Fluttershy tried comforting her.

“Yeah, please take care of her girls.” Shining said.

“Don’t worry. We’ll handle it.” Rarity replied.

“Alright. Bye Twilight take care.”

Twilight simply muttered as the truck left.

“Well we’ll have the house to ourselves for a couple of days.” Cadance said as she got closer to Shining and playfully spun a finger around his chest. “And truth, I’m still a little horny.”

Shining simply grinned.

Later that day as the sun was setting, Sunset arrived at the apartment of her ex. Taking the spare key he gave her and forgot to take back she used to open the door.

“Flash! Look I know I’m barging in but right now I got problem and you’re the best guy to help me out.” Sunset said with her eyes closed.

“Ah sure Sunset. But, you’ve got me at a really bad time.” Flash replied.

Sunset opened her eyes and to her shock she found out Flash on the floor naked, with an equally naked Princess Twilight who was all fours with Flash right in front of her ass. All Sunset could do was stare.

Twilight nervously laughed. “Hey Sunset. F-Funny story: It’s mating season back in Equestria, so I’m in heat, and I was curious about human mating habits, so I decided to kill two birds with one stone.”

Flashy grinned nervously “Ah Sunset thi-”

“It’s mating season!” Sunset blurted. “That’s why I was getting aroused so easily. And why I just soaked my panties.” Sunset realized what she just said and looked back at her naked friends who who couldn’t believe it themselves. There was a moment of silence between the three. “Can I join in?”

Flash and Twilight looked at each and turned to Sunset with smiles. “Sure!”

Sunset then stripped out of her clothes. “Alright! Make room.”

And Sunset, Princess Twilight, Flash, Shining, Cadance, and Moondancer all had a great night’s sleep.

Author's Note

To let people know the scene featuring the plushies of Mario characters is a shout out to the Youtube channel Super Mario Logan https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8gKWMFvVenlVjgysNojYQg

Moondancer's design is based off the one seen here http://ajustice90.deviantart.com/art/EG-Random-Doodles-630813368 And her having crush on Shining Armor is based off these pics http://dm29.deviantart.com/art/He-s-My-Big-Brother-564572976 http://dm29.deviantart.com/art/A-Fillyhood-Crush-616726706

And before anyone asks, the girl at the nude beach wearing a shark fin is the EQG version of Screwball