Bathophobia

by Ice Star

Rating: teen
Tags: Thriller, Drama, Princess Cadance, Horror, Shining Armor, Violence, Princess Celestia, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1820

[Poetry] As Twilight and her friends prepare for the wedding of Shining Armor and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, the real Cadance tries to hold her fragile mind together in the caves beneath Canterlot.

As Twilight and her friends prepare for the wedding of Shining Armor and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, the real Cadance tries to hold her fragile mind together in the caves beneath Canterlot.

Spiritual companion to Atelophobia and Autophobia. Contribute to the TVTropes page! There is an interesting, but spoiler-filled review of this by PaulAsaran you can read here! Here is the audio reading by Lotus Moon.
Recommended by PresentPerfect.

Published 2017-04-22 17:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-04-22 17:20:01 UTC

Worry

"Cady it's alright, I'm sure that whatever dress you'll pick will be fine. Besides, I'm not supposed to see the bride in the dress before the wedding, it's bad luck."

don't think
about everything above
and the weight that crushes you

"I still can't believe that you don't like red velvet cake — it's the best kind! Hey, don't give me that look — I know you practically grew up in a kitchen, but gods, Cady can't you try a bit of this one, I promise it's good, I swear upon all of Twily's old book forts — no, hey c'mon don't you dare talk about how me liking pineapple on pizza is weird because it's not, I swear! Cady, please?"

as stone presses down from above
to pop your little air bubble tomb
and above you
stone knives dance on a ceiling you can't see
but they move
every time you close your eyes
and in your cold-bathed chest
thin heartbeats skip a little faster
and it goes on
for so long
sapping her strength
why she couldn't even move a pebble right now...
lying there alone
cold
and
waiting
for nothing

"Cady, what's wrong? Is it stress again? Hey, Cady, it's fine if you want to take a walk or something, I remember enough of these nobles to know which ones you thought were too pretentious in their music tastes to be cool. Just go take a breather, okay? Hm? What do you mean where? It isn't like I'm asking you to leave the city, Cady. Why not just go visit that hiking trail on one of the nearby mountains that opened up last month. C'mon, do it for me, please? You're far too absorbed in all the little details. The napkin colors aren't that important, I'll just take it from here."

and she thought she remembered
a green dream beneath her hooves
and mountain air tickling her throat
all alone looking out at the twilight
of a kingdom that couldn't be real
because the sky was not a sea of stone

but she also held
something like a little candle
of sunlight
in magic so pure and blue
that didn't falter

all it took was one pause
something like a blink
and—

"Don't worry so much, okay? Everything will be fine, and yes, Cady, I love you too. Have fun!"

Teleportation

Celestia smiled warmly at the little pink lesser alicorn filly sitting next to the great goddess' shadow. A soft bit of motherly laughter as she watched the teenager tap the horn she still had yet to get used to.

"I know that you still aren't familiar with all the rules of magic, Cadance, but that is why you have me to teach you. Nopony has ever become a lesser alicorn before, and that is why we're going to need to start with some basics. Now, what is one of the most basic spells that you have seen?"

"Levitation?"

"Yes, but today I wanted to talk about teleportation."

"But Auntie, can't I just fly to places I need to go? Princesses can still fly can't they?"

Celestia laughed again. Lightly. "Of course they can, but now that you have a horn, it would be wise to learn teleportation. What do you know about teleportation?"

"You wink out from one place to another? Uh, that's it really. I've never really been a unicorn before, but I have a really good theory that in-between teleporting is kind of like when you smoke a—"

"Cadance," Celestia said with a sterner aspect of her motherly side showing in her tone, "I would appreciate it if that particular... hobby... of yours could be kept out of all future magical discussions. Equestria having a second princess is already very big news, and that you are the first pony to be made in an Alicorn's image with such powerful magic is even bigger news. But the news that you are also... a, well, I'm not really sure how to put it, but it is going to be a little shocking to the Equestrian public to know that their newest ruler-to-be and such a sweet little filly... well..."

"Aww, okay Auntie. So, um, magic isn't like that? Uh, okay then. Oh, I have a question!"

Gently, Celestia used her magic to push the pink filly's outstretched forehoof back down with its twin so it was no longer waving wildly with a dangerously loose gold shoe.

"What is your question, Cadance? Please, tell me it is magic-related..."

"It is! I just wanted to know if me just suddenly growing a horn back home means I'll be bad at magic."

"Cadance!" Celestia said, tone worried and slightly scolding as she rested a gold-clad forehoof on the filly's wither. "What could make you say that? You are going to be a very powerful pony when you master magic and I don't want to hear you talk about yourself like that."

"No, Auntie, that's not what I meant. It's just that a unicorn has a horn the day they're born and a pegasus like me has their wings the day that they were born too. If somepony just suddenly grew wings to go with their horn—"

"Cadance, I assure you that ponies do not spontaneously grow wings. Look at me, do you think I just grew wings one day? I was born with both my wings and horn—"

"What about your super fantastic, super trippy mane, Auntie? Were you born with that?"

"No. Did you have anything else to say?"

"Yep, I was going to ask if this means that I'll be, like, magically stunted because I wasn't born with a horn. I feel really different since I got it but not like I'm skilled at magic... just really tingly and itchy sometimes."

"I would not use the word 'stunted' to describe the state that your magic is in, but yes, you will have a harder time mastering some very basic concepts in magic. Your love magic is a talent unique to you, but when it comes to unicorn magic... you may be slow in a few areas. Levitation is unlikely to be one of them. With enough practice, basic levitation is easy enough. But teleportation... it can be harder. Especially if you needed to teleport from a dangerous place — like ruins that were filled with magical traps."

"Auntie, are you saying that I'm going to suck at teleporting?"

"'Suck' is again, not the way I would put it. I would say that you would be able to properly teleport even in dire situations when your strength is down and you are unfocused once you are in your mid-twenties. Until then, your ability to do so is going to be very weak, which is why I would like to see if there is anything we can do to make up for that weakness."

Stars

every single time she closes her eyes
and the stone world of water and cold
that has frozen the blood that marks her hooves
cracked under gold shoes
from attempts to chip away at her prison
trying her best
to put force into where her arcane strengh
has failed

her dirty mane falls like curtains to blur
black spots that dance at the edge of her vision

and sometimes

somtimes she can sit for hours
swaying in an unknown wind
as gravity pushes the weary wisp of a mare
with spots dancing before her eyes

and she stares at nothing
but recalls, in her haze,
and the fog of memory
some brilliance called stars
and for them she lingers on

Blink and Wake Up

But as the time she can no longer count
just ticks on by
and the cold walls of crystal
have their venom seep into her
and lucidity is an occasional recollection
of something that may or may not have been
as her trance wears on
and the sitting spell continues
with all this weight
of worry and exhaustion
and magic that fades without the love it was borne by, in the most difficult of times
and even stars fade from her eyes

Her voice is regained with water
but there is no one to speak to
and the few times she cried out
in this crystal-spiked den
only her ears rung with shattered forms of her image,
but all of them are but reflections splattered across the crystalline chunks

And when nearby echoes that can't be more than a dream fade
there is an instant
when crystal shatters
and a bit of magic sparks within her
at the sight of—

"TWILIGHT!"

Don't Panic

just
take
adeepbreath
and

wait

ignore the stone walls
that are

still

and

wait

for

auntieshinyeverypony
anypony

wait
don't panic

nopony behind you
green eyes

gone

canterlot floors underhoof

gone

thoughts of wedding dresses

gone

and shining armor with the smile that melted her heart and the stupid jokes that made her groan even though they weren't that bad
and
and
twilight
little

no—

not so little
not anymore
twilight sparkle
who liked to guard the book forts
that they used to build together

and now she was...
well it was—

cold

...just her
alone

with all the echoes in the
whole grand city's stomach
for company

and

all she could do

was watch her magic fizzle out

and

breathe

...shining armor with the dorky sister and dorkier smile
a mane of blue
and...

they'd been planning it forever and there was the surprise
for twilight, who never remembered her princess name
to be best mare
and she'd have marble underhoof and sunlight on her face

...'I love you'

Water

Burning in the cold with all the dryness of the Arabian deserts where the sand tangled her mane and Shiny's smile was brighter than his armor, shining in the hot sunlight brought by her lovely auntie so far away
and Canterlot was gone then
but she had been safe
and smiling
because she had him at her side
the sun in her face
and Equestria behind her
on a trip with a deadline
and no green eyes
or bugs
and laughter so cruel it—

But her throat burned sand-hot and she couldn't wet her lips

all her magic did was fizzle out
just like her focus
and her fluttering heart couldn't hold her aura there
and her gaze traveled
everywhere
and
anywhere

because...

green eyes and bugs with chitin shapes cut from shadow and darkness
stole her away

and all her magic did was fizzle out
in the caves where silence was louder
than anything she knew before

and in it
her ears rung
with the sound of nothing at all

but

Her throat was burning and her breathing was labored
Her whole chest seemed to shrink
with each inhale
until
on the floor
from the sound
of her new favorite song
dripping in the icy dark
was

coolwonderfulbeautifulpreciousabsloutelywonderfulshethankedeverygodandgoddesshermothertaughtherandohstarsthereitwasslippingdownherthroatwithanicystingthatlappedovertheburningskinitscoldandsmoothbeautyshininginthelightlessplace

shining...