protagonist of equestria

by Fat Autistic Weeaboo2222

Rating: teen
Tags: Tragedy, Adventure, Crossover, Human
Length: 1355

do not give a shit about you little grammar nazis

Sanford and Deimos from madness combat soap and captain price from MW2 and sarge and grif from the red vs blue series are transported to equestria and team up with the mane 6
to fight the auditor, shepherd, and agent Washington and the meta
will they be able to get along and save equestria WILL GRIF EVER STOP GETTING HIT IN THE BALLS! the only thing i can say is one of them will NOT survive

он будет платить за это тире
-me

same shit different people
i couldn't think of a sixth person
im thinking of adding romance for the later drama but IDK

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-07-19 20:20:05 UTC

classic RvB

(me: knock knock

  haters: whos there

  me: you are

  haters: you are what

  me: you are a dirty dirty shisno ha ha ha)

it was a nice sunny day in equestria ponies walking around doing stuff but were gonna go to the 6 we actually give a shit about.

twilight was in her library preparing for the picnic she was having with her friend's

twilight: spike get ready to go

Spike: okay twilight

as twilight was getting ready she looked out the window into the treeline she could've

********

elsewhere in rvb

********

grif: PROTECT ME CONE!

tex whacks grif in the nuts with a shotgun sending him flying into Simmons

sarge: you idiots let me show you how its done.

tex runs and punchs sarge sending him flying.

grif: nice demonstration sarge.

sarge: ahh shutup.

Simmons: hey guys look up there.

they all looked a the big ass box above tex and tucker.

Tucker: hey caboose remember when i said not to help me forget that i need you to help me right now.

caboose:what holds up that crane?

filiss: mechanical controls are on the left side of the console.

caboose dropped the crate on Tex tucker combat rolled out of the way the plan almost worked but tex is a badass sooo.

tucker: i can't believe that worked.

Tex lifts up the crane slightly.

tucker: oh fuck that didn't work.

filiss: i knew that would not work agent Tex is a bit of a badass.

Tex lifts up a throws the large crate.

tucker: don't worry guys i got this SWISH.

tucker cuts the crate in half but it ends up still hitting grif and Simmons and covers sarge in medkits.

tucker: oh fuckberries Tex can you pl-OWH

Tex big boots tucker onto the ground.

tucker: alright ya know what that's it come here.

Simmons: oh thank god i thought i was a goner sarge were are you?

sarge pops up through the pile of medkits.

sarge:ugh what happened i fell defeated but inexplicably rejuvenated.

(fight skip)

tex super punches tucker knocking the black right off him.

sarge: wow that knocked the black right of him.

Simmons or grif i can't tell: that's racist.

Sarge: yer all clear simmons now shot her.

Simmons: FIRE IN THE HOLE!

simmons fired the rocket but tex was prepared and ran through the teleporter and ran back towards the group.

tucker: are you fucking serious RUN!!!

as the group starts to run Tex comes in to triple closeline them except for grif.

the rocket come in but it passed grifs nuts thank god and it hit a cache of explosives.

the gang was launched into the air but during there air time.

but while sarge and grif were engulfed in a white flash and vanished.

*********

elsewhere in sandtrap.

*********

the white flash engulfed agent was and the meta.

Washington: what the fu-the flash cut him off as he vanished.

doc: well i guess i can leave now. :)

********

meanwhile in equestria.

********

the mane 6 were having a nice picnic near ponyville talking.

then they heard a scream coming from the sky.

twilight: what was that?

applejack: ah don't know twi but ah reckon we go find out.

grif: ohshitohshitohshit were gonna die.

sarge: quit bitching grif if your gonna die do it with honor.

grif: how do you know your gonna live and i die.

sarge: good point well grif it's been an honor fighting with you.

grif: really?

sarge: no.

as they drew closer to the ground  sarge saw a lake.

sarge: grif head towards the lake.

grif: got it.

as they neared the grond sarge was prepared to splashdown but grif not so much.

rainbow: come on it came from the forest.

they neared close to the distress then they heard somthing howl in pain.

grif: THIS IS GONNA BE CLOSE!

as they hit the ground sarge splashed into lake grif was not so lucky and smashed his testicals onto a rock ouch.

grif: OOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

after that he was unconscious.

the mane six finally reached grif and sarge.

Rarity: uhh twilight dear what is that.

twilight: i don't know rarity i'v never seen anything like that before.

applejack: what the hay.

fluttershy: uhh i-it loo-looks mean.

sarge: private grif you should be ashamed sleeping on the job again

mane 6: ...?

sarge: uhh hi im sarge and this lazy asshole next to me is grif

grif: *moan*

twilight: maybe we should go back to my place

sarge: sure

as the mane 6 sarge and grif went back to twilight's library were sarge told them about the war, project freelancer, and most importantly agent wash and the meta

hours later grif awoke to sarge laughing

grif: oh great sarge is laughing this won't be good hey were are we anyway? eh i guess i'll ask sarge

as grif went down stairs he heard unknown voices

grif: hey sarge what the hell i-he was shocked at what he was looking at

sarge: oh he grif meet the locals twilight, rainbow, applejack, rarity, pinkie, and fluttershy

Grif: uhhh hi

rainbow: sup.

twilight: hello.

applejack: howdy.

rarity: greetings.

fluttershy: uhh hi.

pinkie: HI IM PINKIE PIE!

Grif(thoughts): holy shit dude.

sarge: so what should we do now?

pinkie: WE SHOULD THROW A PARTY!!!!!!!!!! (!x1600)

sarge: thats a great idea let's good

as they were walking grif said somthing

grif: wow sarge didn't know you liked to party.

sarge: grif there's alot of things you don't know about me.

as they arrived twilight looked off in the distance and she saw a mysterious figure in the distance all she saw though was a square face and white eyes. (ring any bells!)

rainbow: twilight you coming?

twilight: yeah sure.

Rainbow: whats wrong?

twilight: nothing i thought i saw something.

they both walked inside and the festive's began

sarge started playing

Insane breakneck pace

No brakes full speed ahead on this chase

Goons-nippin at my heels

Move my wheels cuz I'm not tryin to get killed

Ooh-what I'm gonna do?

Me and the crew-one false move-we through

Stress level high it's a full court press

Can't guess wrong the result is death

Adrenaline filled like a kid named ritalin

Gotta get away from this bullshit middleman

Pushed to the max no time to relax

Cuz if we ain't swift we facin the axe

But I ain't tryin to hear it-float like a spirit

Finish line comin, I feel us gettin near it

Can't stop now , yo, we almost there

Unaware of what awaits us in the air

Falling toward the sky

Waiting for my.....ride

Landin safe on the back of the truck

Now we ride through the streets talk about good luck

Man that was tough, jumpin off the building

But if we didn't do it then our time was up

Never that though I'm just too swift

Blessed with a gift that flows from my lips

Still represent still talkin that shit

Still hit your chest like a blast from the fifth

Ain't no stopping I'm-a keep it poppin

Rollin rockin pure hip-hoppin

Soul like Rakim you know I got plenty

I'm a C note, dog, and you're more like a penny

Jeff sent the text, asked for the best

So I stepped right in put flames to the test

Burn it down from dusk til dawn

Rise from the ash and then I'm gone

Falling toward the sky

Waiting for my.....ride

after the song sarge played the song from there warthog. (it's so addicting i'm not kidding i can't stop playing it)

grif: you still have that song.

sarge: never leave home without it.

during the song sarge pulled off some wicked ass dance moves.

grif: damn sarge i didn't know you could dance.

sarge: you'd be suprised at what i can do.

time skip: 1 hour later.

the party ended and they all walked back to the tree house to see to men appear right infront of them.

Price: what the hell

**********

elsewhere

**********

the meta and agent wash awaken to find a person right next to them.

washington: what the fuck.