More Ships Than The Navy

by Aurora Harmony

Rating: everyone
Tags: Drama, Comedy, Romance, Slice of Life
Length: 2730

Fifty young ponies. Twenty-five mismatched couples. Or were they?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2017-04-30 00:19:16 UTC

That Mare's Got Attitude

I sighed.

It was a bit strange, really. It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and I had my favourite dessert in front of me. But I just couldn't relax.

"What's wrong?"

The voice was sweet and bubbly; familiar. Smelling of rose perfume: nothing unusual there. Rose loved to smell like the flower she was named for and sold. I smiled fakely.

"Nothing's wrong at all. Why would anything be wrong?" Horn glowing, my silver spoon levitated in the air, scooping up some ice cream and depositing it in my mouth. "Nuffig'f won, Woz."

Rose frowned. In frustration, she stomped her hoof. "Excuse me? What did you just say?"

I swallowed her mouthful.

"I said, nothing. Is. Wrong. Do you get the idea now, or do I need to spell it out for you?"

The white unicorn scowled, and raised her head. "I don't need -"

"N-O-T-H-I-N..."

"Okay okay, I get the idea! Great Celestia, what is wrong with you? What is the world coming to if a mare can't ask her friend a simple question?"

Huffing, Rose turned around and stomped away. As her footsteps faded into silence, I sighed again.

Only later did I realise she had still thought of me as a friend.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Many hours later, I saw Rose again. I didn't care to say hi, though, or even try to make up with her. I just walked straight past. Rose tensed as I did so.

Many passers-by noticed this change in our attitude.

"What happened between them?"

"I thought they were best friends!"

"Why is Rose acting like this? It's not like her at all."

"Dolphin Dream is acting out of character too."

"Is it about Dr Whooves -?"

I stopped listening after the last whisper. Instead, I ran, crying, onto a side street where no one was. There, I let her tears flow fully.

I had thought that I didn't feel this way about the Doctor anymore. I thought I had gotten over him. But I still loved him as much, and this made the pain worse. Dr Whooves would never even talk to someone as ordinary as me, though. Instead, he had looked towards the rest of my circle of friends, who had excluded me and left me in the cold. I had even been kicked out of my own home.

Hey, hey, Dolphin Dream, they had said. You wouldn't mind if Dr Whooves used your house, do you? Okay, thanks! I hadn't even given my consent. They just...stole it.

Why, why did I have to be so ordinary? Even my cousin Lyra had something really special about her. She had secrets, with supposedly make a pony more enticing. I knew that firsthand, from my limited experiences with the Doctor. But me - my only secret was Dr Whooves. My crush on him, my undying love for him was all I kept hidden.

He never knew. He would never know.

I think it was just my shyness. I can talk easily to my friends because I have known them for years. Dr Whooves just walked into my life and stole my heart. He had many secrets, secrets I longed to find out. Why did he keep his first name a secret? How does he know Derpy? Why won't he speak about his past?

His past. Derpy. Derpy. His past!

Of course! I could have asked Derpy. Unfortunately, I never had the time nor the courage too. She was the basis of Dr Whooves affections. After that was Colgate. Her real name, of course, is Minuette, but she changed it for some reason. Another secret. Pfft.

Colgate and the Doctor had some sort of connection. For one, they both had the same cutie marks. This is actually quite rare - I've done my research - and it always means they are destined to be together. I should have forgotten about Doctor Whooves because of that simple fact. But, as always, my heart didn't listen. And now I am broken like this.

Broken.

Yes, that defines me now. A broken shell of the pony I once was. I blame Angel - he is always leaving his carrots in the blankets Fluttershy kindly prepares for me. I am kind of like a roommate for her now.

Broken.

Broken...

Good Things Don't Come To Those Who Wait

I followed my heart into the fire...

That single line was my favourite in the entire song. And, typically, the first.

In my childhood, I had spent a good many hours thinking about the meaning of it. Was the fire a literal fire? How do you follow your heart? And why follow your heart it makes navigational errors as big as that? I was a smart, literal pony. Gullible, even. I only comprehended it as it was.

Now, however, my questions are different. Was the fire the flames that spring up after the kindling of betrayal is lit by a spark of hope? Is following your heart, following the truth? Or was it following your desires?

Got burned, got broken, down by desire...

The second line - just as good as the first. The first speaks to me, but this...this plucks my Lyra Heartstrings. I, definitely, had got burned. I still have the scars from the flames. Internal scars.

Why is first so much better than second? Why do normal ponies have so many friends they can trust, and boring normal ponies have no one? It doesn't make much sense to me. Then again, nothing makes sense to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My so-called friends were there.

They sat at the picnic spot that only we were supposed to know about, with that flirt Doctor Whooves. Sharing secrets with outsiders. Didn't they know that, sooner or later, he would turn around and stab them in the back? I knew, because my mind had already been fouled by the consequences of love.

There were smiles on all of their faces. Cheerilee was talking to Rose, munching on the lemon cakes they had never touched our last picnic, eons ago. Inwardly, I grinned. I was the only one out of us any good at cooking.

Colgate and Derpy were pressed against Doctor Whooves on either side, almost purring. I felt bile rise in my throat.

Twinkleshine and Lyra were murmuring something on the edge of the mat, every once in a while shooting suspicious glances at the rest of them. Somepony suspects, at least.

Golden Harvest and Cloud Kicker were exchanging Ponyville and Cloudsdale news, and even Octavia was there. She had never gone to any of our picnics before. I felt a twinge of longing and envy.

Also there were Vinyl Scratch, Berry Punch, Cherry, Lily and Showers.

It seemed like the entire circle of our friends were there. Seemed, I repeat. Seemed. I couldn't see Daisy or Linky.

And every single one of them had a huge toothy grin plastered on their faces.

I scowled silently at them. Since they had abandoned me, this had been the only place I had happy memories of.

And here they were stomping all over my good intentions.

I turned around, but I must have stepped on a twig or something because suddenly, they went silent.

"Dolphin Dream?" Lyra. I absolutely despise my cousin, for her friends, her easy life. Everything about her makes me see red.

"Is that you?" The green unicorn got up, and walked over to the bush I was hiding behind. Everypony followed.

Lyra pulled me out from behind my hiding place. Everypony immediately scowled.

"Um...hello," I stammered uncertainly. At once I wished I hadn't.

"Traitor! Left us with this backstabbing -"

"I thought I'd never see y-"

"...doing her own thing..."

"Why did you come back?"

"...not one of us..."

"She is in love with Johnny..."

"He'd never go for somepony like her..."

"Are you okay?"

Lyra, again. I noticed I was sweating, panting. I jumped up, glaring at all of them. Lyra stepped backward, shock clear on her face.

"Why did she come here? She doesn't belong..." Cheerilee started. Lyra shushed her.

"Shut up, Cheerilee. Dolphin Dream is now friendless, homeless and poor. Show some pity."

Friendless.

That was true.

This crowd of ponies were strangers to me. I didn't recognise anypony. Not even Lyra, with her fake half-smile, wanted me here. They were all part of the same clique. They were all cool ponies, now. Mean mares. Doctor Whooves had turned them into monsters. I didn't want to be like them at all.

"No thanks," I spat. "I was just leaving anyway." Ignoring the shocked faces, I stomped right out of there. (It was painful to see the look of hurt on Doctor Whooves face. Unbearable, even. Oh, damn this undying love!)

Later that day, I packed my stuff and left Fluttershy's cottage. This time, I will see if Twilight can help.

And I am done waiting for acceptance.

Rose Is Red, Colgate is Blue, Dolphin Dream I Really Love You!

Dear Dolphin Dream,

I wanted you to know that, no matter what happened between you on your friends, they are still your friends. And if you are still mad at me for being the 'cause' of this, you shouldn't be. In fact, if you had just asked for your house back, I would have given it back to you.

Love from Doctor Whooves

"No, no." He crumbled up the piece of paper and chucked it in the overflowing him behind him. "Love from? What am I doing! This is Dolphin Dream we are talking about. The mare of your dreams, Johnny." Doctor Whooves sighed. He turned away from his work table and picked up a framed photo. It was yellowed with age, but he could still make out the picture of filly Dolphin Dream.

He placed the photo in front of him, and took another piece of paper.

Dear Dolphin Dream,

I know this is a bit random, but I have something to huge to tell you about. Dolphin Dream, you are just amazing. Even in fillygarten you were great at shipping ponies. It was you who gave me the idea of...us. So, on the last day, I left you a box of chocolates and flowers on your desk. And then I waited. I had decided that that day I would tell you how I felt. However, you never came. Instead, Cheerilee, who was a real jerk back then, read out the card to the entire class. I was teased every day after that. Until, three months later, I moved to Vanhoover to escape the teasing. It was hard for me to leave you behind, but I have come back now. You are not the same pony you were. I think this is because of your friends. They were nice, at first, when they saw me again. Then their old selves were jolted back at my memory. You wouldn't have changed because you barely knew me back then. Now, I hope, I can find a way to bring back the Dolphin Dream I know and love. Please come back. I love you, with all of my heart.

Love from,

  Doctor Whooves

Doctor Whooves groaned. "Even worse. I have to take it slow, because I don't know if she likes me back." He picked up a new piece of paper. "Let's try again."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My dreams were filled with huge, rolling waves and endless blue sea. A feeling of emptiness...loneliness... It was terrible. Drowning in my own fears. They were confirmed when I found a letter next to my makeshift bed. I was going insane. Who would leave me a letter in the middle of the town park? I sighed, and opened it.

Dear Dolphin Dream,

The house is yours, if only you ask.

Anonymous

I laughed. It was obviously a trick. One of my former friends must have left it there for me, to see me make a fool of myself. I get tongue twisted thinking about him.

"Are you sleeping here again tonight?"

I almost died as he said those words. I whipped around, and came face to face with Doctor Whooves.

"Doctor Whooves!" I exclaimed. Had he been the one who sent that note?

"Please, just...just call me Johnny." He chuckled nervously and looked over his shoulder. It was a trick! Still, I wanted a moment with the stallion of my dreams.

"Well, Johnny. How did you get away from your marefriends?" I asked casually, like I didn't care.

He looked confused. "You mean Derpy and Minuette?"

"Her name is Colgate. Well. Everypony calls her that."

"I prefer Minuette over Colgate. And Dolphin Dream over Sea Swirl."

I gasped. My name had been Sea Swirl until I changed it to fit my cutie mark. But not even Rose knew. How could he?

"And they aren't my marefriends. They might be smitten with me, but I don't like them."

I gawped. Where was all this coming from, and so randomly, too?

"In fact, there is only one mare I like... And it's you, Dolphin Dream."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The ice was broken after that. He told me everything, from knowing me in fillygarten, to moving to Ponyville to find me. "I didn't mean for anything like this to happen," he said. I comforted him and said it was all right. I even snuggled up to him on the park bench at some point. We were soulmates.

"I think the best thing to do is to find them stallions of their own. And that -"

"- is my talent!" I finished. He nodded, and continued. "We need to set them up on a fake blind date, and pair them with a stallion they would fit best with. However, we need a cover for this. Maybe a sort of show?"

"Of course! Fifty Fates. I have wanted to start a show called Fifty Fates since fillygarten!"

"Exactly." We smiled shyly at each other.

He slid off the park bench and I did the same. I was much more clumsy about it, though, but he just laughed in a friendly way.

Johnny looked me in the eyes, and stepped closer. I felt like stepping back but I loved being this close to him, breathing in his scent. He smelt of pine needles and leather.

He stepped forward again.

I was close enough to nose boop him by now. My face was just a few inches away from his. Should I cross that distance? I didn't have time to decide.

Johnny crossed the distance and met my lips with his. They were soft and sweet, and made me feel goosebumpy all over. We kissed for a second or two, and broke apart. Johnny grinned cheekily at me. I smiled warmly back. Something told me this was the beginning of a long and happy life.

Fifty Fates

Fifty ponies stood on the stage. Some were excited by the challenges that would come. Some were regretting their actions already. Some were brimming with confidence. And some were silenced by nerves.

A pink unicorn stood in front of them, levitating a microphone in the air. She was more nervous than any contestant.

In front of the stage was a brown stallion holding a camera. He smiled, and nodded at the hostess.

"Hello, watchers, and welcome to Fifty Fates! Here behind me are our fifty contestants: twenty-five stallions and twenty-five mares. Are you ready for the first pairing?"

The stallion motioned for her to stop. Dolphin Dream smiled, leaping off the stage to join him below. A few ponies scowled at her retreating back.

The stallion put down the camera and the two of them jumped back onto the stage.

"Each of you-"

"-will get a letter-"

"-saying the time and place of your date."

"You will go there at the specified time-"

"-and if you fail to do so, you won't get any of the awards for Best Date, Best Entrance, Best Exit, Best Pairing and the like."

"You can go home now-"

-but be ready to go on your blind date wherever and whenever it may be. Is that clear?"

The two spoke in practised unison, switching speakers as if they had said this speech countless times before. The contestants nodded, and started leaving. As they left, single file, the hostess and photographer handed out the letters. Mumble thanks were exchanged.