Darkness not really upon us.

by Flyingninjafish

Rating: mature
Tags: Random, Slice of Life, Alternate Universe, Human, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Self Insert, Sex, Spike, King Sombra
Length: 3944

When a human ends up in Equestria in King Sombra's body, he knows he's in for a rough start at the least.

Will was never a massive fan of MLP, being more of a fan of the community rather than the show. So when a MLP con comes into town, he decides to go, only to end up falling into Equestria, in the late King Sombra's body. This can only end badly for him.
Will contain clop, (gay, straight, and bisexual).
Will not contain rape.

Published 2017-05-01 13:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-05-02 12:47:04 UTC

Go to con a human, end up a pony.

Author's Note

Hello anybody willing to read this, this is just something I'm writing to get the idea out of my head, may end up as a proper story, if I get more inspiration to write it.
I got the initial idea for this story off of another fic I think was called 'Hail to the king', which involved a human dying and ending up in a dead Sombra's body. Hopefully I won't unintentionally plagiarize anything too badly, if i do don't hesitate to point it out to me, same with spelling and grammar mistakes.
Also, if you don't like this story, please do not hesitate to explain why, I enjoy constructive criticism, just as long as it's not annoying whining. Though I doubt there's too many out there who would do that.

Go to con a human, end up a pony.

I was never a massive fan of My Little Pony. It was always just a bit too innocent and cute for me. Not mature enough most of the time for me to really get into the show. This did not however make me start hating the show or those who liked it. In fact, I was quite curious in the people who enjoyed the show, and more importantly the things they made out of it. The music, the artwork, the stories. The community these people created that all spawned out of a show intended for little girls. While I may not have loved the show, I adored the community. So over time I slowly became suckered into the brony fandom, albeit staying on the sidelines of it rather than doing anything major.

That changed slightly when a brony convention happened to be scheduled in the nearby town. I was rather anxious to go, having never been to a convention before, but after a bit of mental debate, I decided to just say 'screw it' and go. I was not disappointed. It was not a large convention, but it was packed. Stalls full of fan-made posters, toys, and sculptures. People wearing all manner of costumes of ponies from the show, even a few people wearing what I presumed to be costumes of original ponies based on themselves. But the atmosphere was what sold it. There was a buzz of excitement and cheerfulness that wiggled it's way into your bones until you were walking around with a giant beaming smile. Everyone was polite and happy, perfectly reflecting the nature of the show that brought them all together.

It was as I was walking out of the bathroom, having had a bit too much to drink earlier in the day, when I was waved over to an out of the way stall nearer the back of the convention hall. It stood out though, as in contrast to the bright, warm colors of the other stalls, this one was dark and dreary, almost depressing. I could sort of see why no-one else was visiting it, though the sheer difference between it and the rest of the stalls drew my interest. Walking over, I could more clearly see both the owner and the items on display. The owner seemed intent on carrying on the whole 'evil and mysterious' vibe that the stall had going for it, being clad in a dirty brown jacket, with an oversized hood that cast a shadow over their face, obscuring it for the most part. I couldn't even tell if it was a man or a woman, as the owner spoke in a rather androgynous voice. "See anything you'd like?"

His or her question shook me from my silent observing of them, as I turned my gaze towards what the stall had for sale. The selection was both similar, and vastly different to what the other stalls had. There were the posters, pictures and even a handful of sculptures, but they were all, for lack of a better term, twisted. The posters were abstract in nature, but after a few seconds I could make out rather strange drawings of characters from the show, but with their body parts split up and rearranged into odd designs. The pictures, were more of the same, just on a smaller scale. None of them really appealed to me, though I was curious about the small sculptures that littered the table. There were a few wooden ones of the Mane 6, a rather well made pair of small stone statues of Celestia and Luna, and the one that grabbed my attention the most, a stunningly crafted statute of King Sombra, made entirely of some kind of blue crystal. Having, only the most basic of crystal and gem based knowledge, I could only guess as to what it might be.

"How much for that Sombra sculpture?" I asked, wary of how much such a beautiful piece might cost me.

"Oh that piece?" The owner questioned, before 'oohing' and 'awwing' in thought. "I'll sell it to you for, say, £20."

I blinked owlishly in surprise. "Really? Just 20 quid?"

Shrugging their shoulders the owner replied, "I don't get too many customers as you might've guessed so I sell for cheap to make sure I sell. Plus, it's making these items that interests me, not so much the money. So yes, £20 is all it costs."

Despite the stall owner's assurances, I couldn't help but feel uncomfortable with practically stealing something from him/her at that price. Plus, the hair's on the back of my neck had been standing up the minute the man/woman had stated to talk, and my instincts that had been formed over months of reading fanfictions were warning me that buying anything from a creepy stall was a recipe for disaster. However, it was a really nice sculpture, I didn't really want to spend too much at my first convention, and if something did happen as a result of buying from a creepy stall, I'd probably end up being fine with it. So without further hesitation, I pulled a £20 note out of my pocket, handed it to the owner, and grabbed the crystal statue. Almost immediately, I felt a tugging at my naval. My last sight before I was dragged into blackness, was what looked like a smile on the owner's face.

I screamed soundlessly as I felt myself, grabbed and stretched in all manner of unpleasant ways. My surroundings melted to black, and I could feel my limbs twisting, breaking, and reforming. I shut my eyes in pain, though my vision remained just as dark. This continued for what felt like hours, before, through my shut eyes, I saw a light. Opening my eyes, I saw my surroundings return, as colors swirled past me, blues and greens and reds. It would have been pretty to look at, had I not smacked painfully into the ground.

I don't know how long I was unconscious for, be it a few moments or several hours, but when I awoke, my whole body was aching. Though it wasn't just one kind of ache, more a mix between the kind of ache you get when you get a bruise, and the ache you get when you're having a growth spurt in one area. Needless to say, I was rather reluctant to move, so I didn't. Not until the various aches in my body had began to fade away did I attempt to stand. It was at that point that I noticed something was wrong. I was facing the ground and as I slid my hands under my body to lift me up, I got a look at them, or rather the grey, furry stumps that had replaced them. I didn't scream, but I did stare at them. Alot. Turning them around and looking at them from every angle I could confirmed that I had no hands on either of my arms. It also told me that the ends of the stumps had a bony hooves on them, hidden by tufts of fur.

'So, I have hooves now?' I thought to myself. Looking under myself showed that my legs had also become hooves with the same grey fur as on my arms. A part of myself wasn't surprised however, which may have been why I wasn't freaking out or thinking I'd gone mad. It was an MLP con, it was only inevitable someone bought a cursed item that sent them to, presumably, Equestria. It just so happened to be me. And going off the fact that I bought a Sombra figurine, and my fur seemed to be the same color as him, I could also assume that I had been turned into King Sombra himself. Reaching a hoof up to check, I could feel the signature curved horn protruding from my forehead. 'Well that settles it'. I even tilted my head in a manor that would have been impossible as a human to check my butt, and woe and behold, there on each of my flanks was an image of a red crystal, with two black crystal spikes poking up behind it.

Realizing that I had spent quite some time looking over myself, understandable given the circumstances I was in, I decided to take a look around, to try and get an idea as to where I might have ended up. The ground was made up of a rather dirty concrete, and there were a pair of walls either side of me made up of brick. Up ahead was what looked like a path, and behind me shared a similar view. So I was stuck in a alley, still with no idea where I was. Glancing around the alley, I spotted a few rubbish bags, and a large bin. There beside the bin though was something that startled me a little. Sombra's weird cape thing. It was remarkable clean given that it was laying in an alley, but I wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth. Grabbing it with my teeth, being mindful of the much sharper canines I had gotten as part of being Sombra, I threw it onto my back, and with some careful wiggling, got it laid out over me. It even came with a hood, though I couldn't really use it as I had no idea how to use hooves or magic to help put it over my head.

Walking as a pony was surprisingly easy, if I went slowly. Just like walking on hands and knees, though I was a little unbalanced with the slightly different weight distribution. Creeping over to one end of the alley, I poked my head out and took a look round. Then I looked up. And up. And up. Until my eyes finally came to a rest at the top of the crystal empire's Eiffel tower rip off of a castle. 'Well at least I know where I am now. But I don't know when.' Though this did raise a rather large issue. Sombra was considered persona non grata in the Crystal Empire, and I had no illusions that if the guards or God forbid Cadence or Shining Armour found me, I'd be chucked in the dungeons faster than you could say 'crystals'.

Moving my gaze back from the castle, I turned to look down the street, only to freeze at the sight of a crystal pony staring at me, wide eyed and slack jawed. I stared back. The moment seemed to draw on forever until I said "Um, hi?"

This seemed to set the stallion off, as he screamed in a voice a little too high pitched for a man, drawing the attention of the handful of other ponies that littered the street that I hadn't seen. They too took one look at me, recognized who I was, and ran away screaming bloody murder. All the while I stood there watching the chaos as everypony abandoned whatever they had been doing to flee in terror. In less than 5 minutes I was alone, not having even moved out of the alley. "Well that was just rude." I mumbled to myself as I began to walk down the street with no particular destination in mind, grimacing at the sound of my voice. It sounded like I was chocking on sand paper. "God, how is anyone going to understand what I'm saying. I sound like I'm just saying, 'arrgargrah agragabah!'. Note to self, find spell to change voice."

A 'warm' welcome

General POV

Shining Armor was not used to ruling an kingdom. He had spent most of his life as a soldier and a guard, serving proudly under Celestia. Even after beginning to date, and eventually marrying Princess Cadance, he'd never thought he would wind up ruling a kingdom. Why would he? There was no major pieces of land that didn't fall under Celestia and Luna's control, and there were few, if any, places that wanted a different set of rulers. So Shining put the issue of governing aside, focusing instead on honing his skills, so as to be better able to defend himself, the people, and his wife.

That is why, several weeks after the Crystal Empire had resurfaced, Shining was stressed out to say the least. With no pre-warning he had been thrust into the role of a completely different leadership than he was used to, and had almost no time to adjust to being a legitimate prince, with actual duties. He tried, by Celestia he tried to do his best, but he honestly had next to no idea what he was doing. Meeting with diplomats, negotiating trade deals and events, creating legislation. It all made his head spin. Fortunately he had a brilliant, and supportive wife by his side to help him whenever she could, and teach him the subtle nuances of being the leader of a kingdom.

Cadance was his port in the storm, always there with a gentle word and a light touch to help sooth him, and get him through each arduous day. As the recently dubbed 'Crystal Princess', the ponies of the Crystal Empire looked to her for help when it was needed, and she was more than happy to do so, alongside her self appointed task of aiding couples in need. As the pair sat in their thrones in the Crystal Castle, enjoying a short break from the general day to day hectic going-ons, Cadance by chance happened to look out of a window, only to see large crowds of ponies seemingly fleeing from something, if the terrified looks on their faces were anything to go by. "Shining, you wouldn't happen to know why everypony's running around scared out there would you?" She asked, hoping he might have a clue.

"No, I don't." Shining replied, hopping off of his throne and walking over to the window his wife had been looking out of. Taking a glance himself, he saw the crowd making their way towards the castle. "But I think we'll find out soon enough."

"What do you think it could be?"

"Dunno, but c'mon, what's the worst it can be? It's not like it can top that whole Sombra fiasco a few weeks back?"

At that moment the doors to the throne room were flung open by a harried crystal guard, who dashed up to them and gasped out "Sir, it's terrible, King Sombra has returned!"

A pin drop could have been heard in the silence that followed. The guard watched as Cadance turned to lazily glare at a very sheepish Shining and said "You just had to tempt fate didn't you?"

Meanwhile, back in the city

Will POV

"Where the fuck am I even going?" I asked myself aloud as I wandered the empty streets. I had been walking with no destination in mind, save for avoiding the castle for the time being in fear of being caught right away, all the while talking to myself, in an attempt to get used to talking in my new, gravel voice. Once in a while I'd come across a pony who had chosen to poorly hide, rather than run. When that happened I just cheerfully waved to them with the most dumb-ass, cheerful smile on my face. Rather than laugh at my stupid looking mug, they instead ran away, screaming in fear. It was actually kind of funny to watch.

Eventually I reached a junction in the middle of the street, splitting off left, right, and forwards. Fortunately there was a post with directions on it.

<--- Spa, Bank, Marketplace
---> Library, Museum, Theater District

My gaze lingered on the sign pointing to the right fork. A library? I guessed it could be the library seen in the show. It was also probably the best place for me to get an idea as to how to use my magic. I knew that eventually I would probably have to go on the run, as my presence was likely already known to Shining Armor and Cadance, so their guards would be out searching for me. It'd probably be best for me if I at least had some idea on how to use some basic magic to defend myself. Plus I might find a spell to change my voice, that'd be nice.

And so I set off in search of the library. As I strode through the deserted streets, I couldn't help but think it looked a little eerie. Bags and pieces of loose clothes like hats had been dropped or knocked off in their panic fueled escape. Chairs and tables from cafe's had been kicked over, and food laid abandoned, still warm. But the worst part was the silence. The crowds must have gotten pretty far away by now, as I couldn't hear any screams, any panicked voices, or fast paced clops of hooves on the ground. I pulled my cape closer to myself in nervousness.

I kept my head on a swivel as I approached the library, wary of any guards that might have been posted or patrolling nearby. I hadn't ran into anypony yet, but I was cautious enough to assume the guards would be out in force looking for me by now. After a moment to appreciate the crystal griffon statues, I dashed up the stairs and went inside. Upon entering I stood in shock at the sheer quantity of books that stood before me. Huge, 3 story tall bookshelves made a maze of literature. As I trotted in, the sound of my hooves echoed throughout the building. Seeing no one else around, I got to work trying to find a book on the basics of magic. It took me about 10 minutes of walking through ailes, checking the signs above each that said what each section was, (thankfully they were in English), to find a section on magic. A few moments of quickly scanning the titles of the books netted me a book that seemed to be a new addition if the clean cover was any indication.

"Magic for dummies, huh? Guess some things are constant even across universes." Grabbing the book, I sat down at a nearby table, and set about trying to figure out how to magic.

Meanwhile, back at the castle

General POV

"All right, I've sent word to Twilight and Celestia about Sombra's possible return. We don't know for sure if he's back, but better safe than sorry." Cadance explained to her husband who had been preparing the guards to go and search for the resurrected tyrant. "That dragon fire spell auntie Cel taught me should get the message to them within a few minutes at least."

"That's good. If Sombra has returned it's best they be prepared in case he slips past us." Shining agreed. "You did say we're not entirely sure he's back right? It's just, you know Twily will be worried about us?"

"Yes Shining, I made sure to put it might just be false alarm. And I'm sure that neither of them would do anything reckless before we found out the facts."

Cadance only received a flat look from Shining and a reply of "This is Twilight we're talking about. I can bet you she's going to come and check up on us at least."

Just as Cadance was about to reply, she was interrupted by the appearance of a pair of rolled up letters via green flames, bearing the seals of both Princess Celestia, and Twilight. Opening Celestia's letter, Cadance said "Well, she said has full confidence in us to find out whether Sombra's back, and to deal with him if needs be. She also said that if we need help she'd be here in a moments notice. Well that's good. What does Twilight's say?"

"It just says, 'On my way' in really scribbly writing. Weird how she added the seal though if that's all she wrote." Shining mumbled to himself, not even glad that he had been proven right. Shining did not want Twilight back here to face Sombra again. The last time Sombra attacked, he'd been almost useless, and Twilight could have been badly hurt. So it was both a point of pride, and a desire to protect his little sister, that he deal with Sombra on his own. Or at least, without her help. He expected the guards to help, it was their duty, and he wasn't about to deny them a chance to get back a little at the bastard that had done so much wrong to them. He just hoped she wouldn't jump on the first train here.

Meanwhile, in Ponyville

"C'mon guys, we've gotta go! Move it move it, the train's leaving in a few minutes!" Twilight cried out to her friends, urging them to hurry. She'd had just enough time to gather up her friends and explain the situation as the group galloped to the train station.

"Twilight, ah know you're worried an all, but can't ya at least wait until we know that Sombra's back before we all go runnin' off?" Applejack asked as she ran up to Twilight's side.

"No!" Twilight responded, "If it is Sombra, we can't afford to wait!"

"Um, Twilight?" A meek voice questioned from just behind the pair. "Why don't you just teleport us there?" Fluttershy asked.

Gasping, Twilight replied "Good idea Fluttershy! Everypony hold on!" With that the group was surrounded by a bright purple glow, and with a 'pop' the group was deposited at the train station. Quickly buying their tickets, the hurried mares jumped onto the train just as it was preparing to leave. They were on their way to the Crystal Empire.

Meanwhile, back at the Crystal Library

Will POV

"YES!" I cried out in jubilation, having succeeded in levitating the book I had been reading into the air. True, I only did it for a few moments before it dropped onto the floor, it took me almost an hour to do, and levitating things wasn't exactly the most impressive thing ponies could do with magic. But dammit a childish part of me was just squeeing in excitement over being able to actually move things with my mind! Taking a moment to just mentally celebrate, I concentrated once more on extending my magic to wrap around the book and pull it into the air, just like the book said. After a few moments of concentration, I saw on the reflective crystal table my horn become covered in a shaky red glow. The book was soon surrounded by a similar glow as it lifted a few inches off of the table. "I am going to get this." I mumbled to myself, determined to at least be able to competently levitate things before I was found out.