Madness, and How to Live With it

A group of ponies walked in Canterlot castle, roped together. Two pegasi leading, an earth pony loaded with packs behind them, and then a unicorn with notebooks, a map, and writing utensils.

The front pegasi was yellow, his name, Brave Heart. He was older than most, and one of the best team leaders. He was good at telling when something was safe or not, and had a natural calmness and sense of direction that was even able to deal with the madness that covered Canterlot.

The one behind him was Rainbow Dash, and she was there because absolutely nopony was going to stop her from being there. She was the striker, the one there to move heavy objects, and to kill things before they had a chance to hurt anypony. And though she was always focused on her job, a small part of her mind always kept an eye out for somepony special.

Behind her was Carrot Root. A strong earth pony who was fairly good at keeping her head in any situation. Very little distressed her, not even the bones scattered around the castle. A calm mind, and a strong body, able to act with care, and not react without thinking.

The one bringing up the rear was Bright Glitter. While the teams were normally composed of experienced, older ponies, she was only just a mare, very young yet. But her talent made her invaluable; she could sense and sometimes, rarely, see the anomalies. It was by her that enabled the team to walk in safety and some confidence. Otherwise she functioned as the map maker, as much as a map might be made of Canterlot nowadays.

Brave led them deeper than normal. Previous territory had been mapped enough for recovery teams to begin scavenging, and it was time to find something else. Canterlot was hazardous to enter, unless one did so through a specific area; a hole blown into the back of Canterlot castle.

Thus far, nopony had ever made it into the city below, and the first step onto the ground floor left you in one of the towers. Though it seemed whole, there were numerous anomalies which made it as if the castle was cut into pieces which were only tenuously connected. Teams worked to discover every possible variation of room, and to try and find and hopefully nullify any danger that they might hold.

Currently held territory, if you could call it that, was three rooms and two corridors. A very small plot of land. Most of the paths led into the garden, and the garden was a deathtrap for any who entered.

There was only one door not yet explored, and Brave led his group through that one, arriving somewhere else in an instant. They were used to it, and it was what the rope was for. Walk through an anomaly one by one and everypony would arrive somewhere else, alone. Roped together, though it was jarring, they stayed together.

Rainbow spotted and stamped on a thing the moment they arrived, it winking out of existence as if it had never been. Brave looked around, noting that they had found another room, a fairly large one. It might have once been a library, but everything was destroyed and taken apart enough to make it hard to tell.

“Glitter?” he asked, making sure that he looked in corners and dark spots.

“Um… a few bad spots sir.” Glitter said, focusing. “The entire right wall is bad, and spots of air are bad.”

“No flying then. Safe to walk?”

“Yes… but slowly. All the wood and paper makes it hard to tell.”

“You heard her. Slow, and make sure to keep your eyes open.”

They moved forward, Brave using his wings to toss smaller particles away. If they didn’t move, or worse, suddenly stopped, he didn’t go near it. The others followed after him, moving in a line, with Carrot making sure she memorized their step pattern. It might be vital.

They stepped through broken shards of wood, and what might have once been paper and books. Sometimes there was a page which still had legible hoofwriting on it, but those were few and far between. Things were destructive, and left little behind.

“Sir?” Glitter said, pulling the group to a gentle stop. “Ahead are multiple placement anomalies. Not regulated to a door or hall.”

“Can you see them?”

“Not well at all. There is a time anomaly over the whole room. I don’t know what type it is, but it isn’t age effective.”

Brave tensed and then relaxed as she spoke, groaning faintly.

“Sorry sir.” Glitter said, flinching slightly. “Didn’t see it until I saw the others.”

“Try harder Glitter. I don’t want to see anypony turn to dust.”

Glitter nodded. Brave sighed. “Anything else?”

“The room is mostly clear sir, at least, the ground is. Front half empty of any deadly anomalies, and no particles. The air has a good scatter though, and the path ahead is a minefield.”

“Right. Start moving back team.”

They cautiously tracked their steps backward, until Glitter’s rear hoof touched the previous anomaly and they found themselves in the kitchens. It was normal for that to happen, and eventually they would be back in safe-ish territory if they kept taking the same placement anomaly.

“Food?” Rainbow remarked, seeing several examples of unfinished dishes scattered around the place. It was mostly untouched, and Glitter paled.

“Stasis spots!” she yelled. “At least a dozen!”

Brave didn’t even bother, and touched the placement anomaly again.

They went through five more areas, each one deadly, until they found the original entry hall, the giant wooden doors behind them and the hall open in front of them.

Glitter focused, and then sighed. “No anomalies on the ground, a few on the ceiling. The area around the lights have particles, and the stones slightly sunken show signs of acid damage. Safe otherwise.”

Brave nodded, and then, “Don’t move!” came from above them.

They looked up, and all of them flinched. Standing on the wall above them was a purple alicorn. At least, it looked like a purple alicorn.

Her horn had an endless spiral that gave them a headache just from looking at it. Her eyes held a swirl of colors, seemingly empty, but they saw a pupil hovering in the chaos. And her wings…

Her wings looked like some mad pony had taken wings from all kinds of wings, and then melded them together in any way he saw fit. Scales, and feathers, and skin, all sorts of kinds and colors forced together into misshapen wings. They even bled in spots, the blood dark and seemingly absorbed again before it could truly fall from her.

Her cutie mark seemed to race along her form, shifting like water and forming distressing shapes when it stopped moving. Both her mane and tail had an undefined aspect to them, making one assume them to be infinitely long, or possibly made of flesh, like a tentacle.

“If you move, the floor will give.” she said, in a perfectly normal voice. “It isn’t supported by anything but itself, and physics is applicable just in front of you.”

They didn’t respond. They nearly couldn’t. Though she was different, and was greatly changed, they all recognized the lost princess Twilight. Presumed dead when the city had fallen three years ago. And for three years, she had never been found, nor seen.

But with the exception of Rainbow, they settled on the thought that she had been taken by a thing, turned into a monster. They decided that what stood on the wall was not the princess, but a thing wearing her skin.

“It’s…” Rainbow whispered, but Brave frowned.

“Back up, and slowly.” he ordered.

“But…” Rainbow said.

“It is not her Rainbow. It only looks like her.”

The alicorn cocked her head in slight confusion, and then stepped down the wall, vanishing the moment her hoof touched the stone. They kept staring at where it had been.

“Glitter…” Brave said, looking around somewhat worried.

“The… the anomaly has moved sir. It’s different now.”

“Touch it anyway. I want us out of here.”

Then the alicorn seemingly reappeared right in front of them, and Glitter screamed before touching the door again.

Then they were gone, and arrived in the throne room.

“Glitter!” Brave yelled. “Update! Rainbow, get those spears ready!”

“But…”

“Rainbow!”

Rainbow retrieved her spears from her own pack, feeling very uncertain.

“The entire room has a lot, but they are clustered together sir. I can see a clear path to the thrones. And any indication of things is not present. No hiding spots either.”

Brave relaxed and sighed. He suspected that their encounter had been far too close.

“Good. Two good things then.”

“What’s two good things?” Carrot asked.

“We got away, it’s not following, and we found the thrones again. Princess Celestia says that she had left several items of emotional value behind here. Glitter, lead and everypony keep an eye out for a crown, a golden shoe, and a box marked ‘Luna’.”

The others nodded, and headed into the room. Glitter lead the way, and she weaved around the area as Carrot dropped markers with every turn.

They arrived at the thrones themselves, and each looked around, but spotted nothing.

“Glitter?”

“Too many sir. I can’t tell if anything’s caught in something. The ceiling is completely covered, many layers, time and placement.”

Brave sighed. “Back the way we came then. We’re returning.”

They began moving that way, but as they arrived at the final stretch the alicorn reappeared, between them and the door. She used her wings to somehow keep her aloft, the motion making a strange sound with every flap. It was slightly different every time.

“Hang on!” she cried. She held out a hoof, clutching the lost crown and they stared.

“Look! You were looking for this, right? I want to help you. Here, have it.”

She tossed it, and it rolled toward them. Brave didn’t even have time to respond when it touched his foreleg.

And Brave, Glitter, and Carrot vanished, the rope connecting them to Rainbow falling limp. Rainbow stared, and then whipped her head toward the alicorn, seemingly uncaring of what had happened.

“That’s not supposed to happen.” The alicorn said, her voice almost analytical. It hurt Rainbow to hear that tone.

“Move!” Rainbow yelled, readying a spear.

The alicorn looked at her, and she flinched.

“Rainbow!” it said, and she flinched again. “Rainbow, it’s me!”

“Twilight Sparkle!”

“You remember me, right? It hasn’t been that long ago… has it? You are the same I remember. You haven’t changed at all…”

“STOP IT!” Rainbow screamed, her eyes screwed shut. Doing her all to prevent her tears.

“What…”

“STOP IT! You’re. Not. Twilight! Twilight… Twilight’s GONE! And she’s not coming back, not even if you look like her, and talk like her, and know what she knew!”

“Rainbow…”

“I’m not afraid of you, you hear me!? I’M NOT! I’M NOT!”

And then Rainbow charged forward, her vision blurred with tears. The spear impacted the alicorn, and she stumbled away, letting Rainbow hit the far door and vanish.

The alicorn, Twilight, stumbled, the spear sticking in her shoulder. The pain of it was nothing compared to the pain of having Rainbow react to her like that though.

She pulled it free, and her flesh stitched together the moment it was gone. Then she tossed it away, and turned to follow Rainbow, already able to see where she had gone.

Rainbow flew as fast as she could, uncaring of anything. She ran from the alicorn, and she did not care what she might hit in her flight.

Three years ago, Twilight had been swallowed by the anomalies. She had been there, and saw her vanish as the city fell. Saw her disappear right before her own eyes.

They had all looked for her. For a year, all of them had put themselves into mortal danger, trying desperately to find her. To find some clue as to her fate. But they never had.

After a year, they had given up, and marked her amongst the dead. They had held a funeral, and Celestia and Luna had presided over it. Rainbow was tough, but even she couldn’t really bear the thought of Twilight’s death.

After three years, she might just be able to accept that she was gone. After three years, having a sign that said Twilight wasn’t coming back would have been… accepted. After a time. She had cried a lake over the loss already. There wasn’t much more that it could do to her anymore.

But seeing Twilight twisted, and taken, and speaking as if she had never left…

Rainbow had never had a greater hope, than the hope of finding Twilight, alive and well. And seeing her, no matter how changed, had made that hope rise to the forefront, but Brave had been right. They had seen it before.

Sometimes, when a thing killed a pony, they took its body for themselves. A pony shape to a more or less degree that was no different for the things themselves. And when they did so, they could speak like that pony had spoken, and sometimes knew what that pony had known.

But the pony was gone, and it was all a trap for anypony that thought that their loved one was still alive, or that somepony might have somehow survived in Canterlot. The eyes always gave it away, as did any extra physical deformity.

The eyes turned into a swirling mass of colors, some of them impossible to describe. On every thing that moved in Canterlot, they all shared those eyes.

And the thing that had taken Twilight had had those eyes. Had had so much of her, her voice, and if Rainbow had stayed, maybe even her memories. And it drove Rainbow to her brink, seeing that, and hearing that.

Death would be accepted. A mockery of her friend, a moving, talking, actually looks like Twilight Sparkle but changed thing couldn’t be. She knew that one day, she might have to kill it, and she did not have the strength of soul to be able to. The thing that had taken Twilight would take her if she saw it again, if she heard it again. She knew that.

So she flew, uncaring of any anomaly, passing through one after another without stopping or looking. And she never noticed the fight that raged next to her.

Twilight flew after her, and it was… next to her. And with every moment it tried to kill Rainbow, and with every attempt Twilight either took the blow, or managed to deflect Rainbow on her path.

Twilight could see that Rainbow was in no shape to see her again. While the rejection pained her like nothing else, she would not let her perish here.

So with every instant she tried to fight it off, and it merely had never been there every time she tried to hit it. Every time it moved particles into Rainbow’s path Twilight got her to miss it, oftentimes suffering the agony herself. But that was fine. She would survive. Rainbow wouldn’t.

Anomaly after anomaly she chased after Rainbow, it always waiting just ahead. Point after point, through the castle and into the city, steadily getting more and more dangerous until Twilight felt that she had no choice.

She struggled, and grabbed the next anomaly before Rainbow hit it. And using the stuff it worked on, made it bend the way she wanted it to.

It was painful. It was damaging. It made her feel more than a little bit insane, breaking reality like that, but she did it for Rainbow. And when Rainbow went through that one, she arrived at the exit, and flew through it without a single feather out of place.

And then she let go of the stretched anomaly, and landed panting. Her hoof was strange now. It felt tougher. More durable. It was next to her. It always had been.

“uylks fajkd.” it intoned. Then, “I am proud, my daughter.”

Her head whipped toward it, but it had never been next to her. It spoke. It had spoken more words. After endless tries, it finally responded to something she had done.

And she was terrified that that meant something terrible. That its sudden words meant… meant that it was happy. And if it was happy… then what had she messed up? What did she do wrong, to make it happy?

But it was of no matter. Rainbow was safe. That’s what she cared about. And since Rainbow was now safe, she was free to relax.

So she wailed into the air, and collapsed, sobbing. Rainbow had rejected her, speared her, was terrified of her. And she didn’t know why, but she thought she did.

She thought that Rainbow knew that she had caused this. Caused the anomaly, caused all the deaths, and pain. And that now, Rainbow viewed her as the monster. The thing that needed to be killed to make everything normal again.

And though Rainbow did not have the heart to kill what had been her old friend, she never, ever wanted to even think about Twilight Sparkle ever again. And Twilight could see her way to the rest of her friends doing the same.

Looking at her, and fearing her, and turning away from her. All of them. Her mind tormented her with the thoughts and sounds of it. Rainbow, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rarity, Pinkie, all hating her. Celestia, staring at her as if she was a monster. Spike, running terrified from her.

And through it all, she agreed with them. She was a monster. She was something to be feared, something that deserved their hate. Something that needed to be gone, and in some ways was gone. Twilight Sparkle, the princess of friendship was gone.

And in her place was simply Twilight Sparkle. Twilight Sparkle the monster, the killer of hundreds, the cause of every last anomaly, the reason that it had come.

Her frail hopes of being found and rescued flew up and shattered. Anything that she had held onto to keep herself flew from her. There was nothing left for her anymore. Nopony to turn to, nopony that would ever look at her with affection ever again.

She cried and sobbed, prone on the ground as her form heaved with her breathing. She cried from the blame she so easily heaped on herself, from the hate that she was so certain was there. From the breaking of her hopes. From the way Rainbow had looked at her, from the way the ponies with her had looked at her.

For every pony dead, dead by her hooves. For every last mote of pain and suffering ever suffered because of the anomalies. For everything she knew she had lost, only made worse by the idea that she might have saved it. Only made worse, by the knowledge that she might have prevented it.

She didn’t know how long she had cried. After a while she slowed and stopped. After a while the pain grew numb, and her tears dried up.

And then it was there again. And it… had only recently been there, only recently arriving to watch her sniffle and remain limp on the ground.

And then it walked to her, the very first time it had ever moved logically. And then it stopped before her, and regarded her. She looked up at it. She looked into eyes that defied reason that seemed a portal to a place where nothing would ever live. Where nothing was constant, where anything could happen, where reality would never be found. Not even one tiny part of it.

And she thought that just perhaps that that place would be preferable to her.

“Stop crying, my daughter.” it said. She saw its mouth move, and it gave her a concerned look.

“They have thrown you away my daughter, but I, I will always be there. Run to me, my daughter. Join with me, and forget your pains and past. Throw it away, as you have been thrown away. For I shall never forget you, never see you with hate. I always loved you, even when you were not my daughter my daughter.”

It reached a hoof out, a hoof that was… normal. A purple leg, with a normal hoof, and fur she could see.

She looked back up, and saw eyes that sparkled purple, and a face and horn that were real. A mane that was actually hair, a form that didn’t change at all. Not one hair.

A cutie mark on… his flank. A symbol of freedom, of the release from pain and suffering.

She looked at him, seeing him for the first time.

“Who are you?” she asked, still staring into those eyes so like her own.

He smiled. A perfectly normal smile.

“My name… I have many names my daughter. A great many, so many that even I cannot count them anymore. Perhaps you will see your way to giving me a new one.”

“…Do you like… Hope?” she asked him.

His smile grew, and she grasped his hoof and he pulled her up. All around her, Canterlot was normal. Nothing was like it had been just a second ago.

Ponies walked the streets. The sun shone down on the city, and not one thing was out of place. She looked at Hope in surprise and he winked at her.

“It’s normal…” she breathed, looking about in wonder. “They’re alive…”

“They always have been my daughter. You just had eye trouble all this time.”

She looked at him again. And then she smiled in simple happiness. “I like this.” she told him.

“It is good. You are good, my daughter.”

“Thanks… Father.”