ATTAAAACK!!! (If you don't mind)

by NixWorld

Rating: teen
Tags: Original Character, Comedy, Fluttershy, Random, Sex, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1625

Fluttershy is a simple pony. Being an animal caretaker, she doesn’t really have much excitement in her life. It only makes sense that she manages to become a general for the Equestrian army.

Fluttershy is a simple pony. Being an animal caretaker, she doesn’t really have much excitement in her life.

It only makes sense that she manages to become a general for the Equestrian army.

Now… with the help of an awesome veteran General, a Captain that is ever so close to insanity and a turned on Sergeant that seems to fall in love with everything she sees, Fluttershy will hopefully save Equestria from impending doom.

Cover art by Whatsapokemon.

Published 2017-05-03 19:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2017-05-03 19:10:02 UTC

Chapter 1

Canons were heard. Arrows were fired. Soldiers perished.

The long battle between the ponies of Equestria and changelings continued furiously. The changeling herd showed great resistance against the Royal Guard brigade. The soldiers of Equestria nevertheless kept their heads up high as thousands upon thousands of troops marched into battle.

Fortunately, the visceral scene of violence and carnage was not visible within the walls of the Command Centre. Inside the well protected tent, which was located quite a few metres away from the battlefield, was Captain Solar along with a couple of guard-ponies positioned near the entrance.

In the middle of the room was a large table with a map on it. There were various props such as trees, wooden canons and tiny wooden soldiers. The wooden figures were divided in two different colours. Red and blue. The trees were scattered around the sides, more dense on certain parts of the map, everything accurately mirroring the actual battlefield.

Despite the Command Centre’s well protected tent structure and careful positioning, magical explosions could be heard from the inside, shaking the floor beneath and causing some items to fall.

The explosions continued with little time between them. After the fifth one was heard, a soldier pony came stumbling down the entrance.

“It’s madness out there, sir!” The mare shouted as she got back up on her hooves.

Captain Solar just stared at her.

After recuperating her balance, the mare headed near the tactical table. “Sergeant Magnite reporting for duty, sir!” Another magical explosion was heard from the outside. “Are you ready to assist with the command orders, sir?”

Captain Solar approached the table then began analysing the map as well as the carefully laid details.

“Let’s… do this,” Solar said, ready for anything. “Please give me reports on the current-“

“You’re so hot.”

Solar suddenly stopped what he was initially going to say. He very slowly moved his head towards Magnite. “What did you say?”

“Pardon?” She appeared to be confused.

He raised his eyebrow. “Right now, you said something.”

“Yes sir! I asked if you were ready to assist with the command orders.”

He scratched his chin. “You didn’t say anything after that?”

“No, sir!” She was still stood up in attention.

Solar took a few moments to gather his thoughts. It sadly wasn’t enough for him to remember what he was going to say. “Very well… umm… did you come here to tell me something?

Seargent Magnite nodded and cleared her throat. “General Charm ordered me to inform you on a few important details before we start.” She looked down at the map. “You are to assist in the issuing of orders from this room using the tactical table in front of you. As you probably guessed sir, the wooden blue ponies are friendly forces and the red ones are the enemy force.” She pointed at both sides of the map.
“Other sergeants, such as myself, will be entering the Command Center sporadically to update you on the situation. After you issue the orders to them, they will contact the Communications Center to carry out the orders to our infantry via telekinetic messages sent by Unicorns."

Solar concentrated on her words, making sure he understood absolutely everything.
“Are there any doubts you would like me to clear up, sir?”

Solar tapped his chin. “Yes, actually. Are you sure you didn’t say-?“

“CHANGE OF PLANS!” A pony shouted as he entered the room. His presence and distinguishable armour made all ponies in the room salute.

“Ummm… is-is there som-something wrong, General Charm? Sir?” Magnite asked, contemplating his pretty face that seemed younger than usual.

General Charm looked at her, his slick grin showing through his dirtied helmet. “On the contrary. I was able to find one of the Elements of Harmony to command our troops.”

Magnite bursted with excitement. She closed in on Charm. “Really?! Is it Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship? Or better off… Rainbow Dash?! The most awesome pony in Equestria?!” She rubbed a poster of Rainbow Dash on her cheek while blushing.

“It’s not Twilight Sparkle or Rainbow Dash.” He looked at the door. “Uhh, ma’am? You can come in, now.”

The one and only… the legendary, courageous, valiant, fearless, daring pony finally entered the room. The might and power of the magic that connected her with the very element she represents pulsed in her heart. Her value towards Equestria as a protector and keeper of peace would surely win this war. She would make worlds collide .The earth would tremble. And every single living being that has ever existed, alive or perished, would witness the true wrath of this pony’s fury and anger. They would be blinded by her overwhelming power. And scarred by the deep evil that lies in the very depths of her soul…

...

She had a flower in her hair. “Hi, everypony.” She smiled.

Everypony looked at her in her disappointment, barely managing not to show it.

To break the awkward silence, another pony stepped into the tent. “It’s madness out there, sir.” He dropped to Solar’s hooves. “MADNESS, I TELL YA!”

“Why does everypony love saying that…?” Solar murmured to himself.

“Private Glacier,” General Charm said. “Status report.”

Private Glacier got up and saluted. “Yes, mommy- I MEAN SIR” He approached the tactical table on the right side, where the red ponies were positioned. He moved some halfway across the table. "Enemy cavalry has been spotted by our scouts. They are closing in, fast.”

“How fast?” General Charm asked.

“Fast enough that it caused many of our troops to use the bathroom simultaneously.” He trembled at the sights he witnessed.

“Wow, that’s pretty fast…” Charm looked back at him. “Anything else?”

“Yes, sir.” Glacier went to the left side of the table. He then separated some blue ponies from the middle. “Magical projectiles penetrated our defence and dispersed some friendlies towards the west and east sides of the battlefield. Enemies are closing in from the north,” He took a moment to breathe shortly before looking at Charm. “Your orders, sir.”

“Not my orders, private.” He looked at Fluttershy. “You are to command our soldiers, ma’am.”

They all expected this. Why else would General Charm bring Fluttershy here? It didn’t really come as a surprise that he just put her in command. The only pony who was really surprised was Fluttershy herself, although she was a bit too busy trying to process everything rather than expressing her emotions.

Captain Solar cleared his throat. “Uhh General? Can I talk to you for a minute?”

General Charm nodded. He and Solar then stepped a few inches away from the group, now talking in a hushed tone.

“Permission to speak freely, sir,” Solar asked.

“Permission granted.”

“Well I think you’re completely out of your mind and it’s time for you to retire. I’ll take Fluttershy’s place.”

Charm frowned. He swiftly looked at Fluttershy before diverting his gaze back to Solar. “I know what you’re thinking Solar but I can’t let you do that. You know what the Royal Guard Codebook says:

“In the event that, during a battle, a General or Field-Marshal is unavailable due to unlikely and unfortunate circumstances, all soldiers must follow the direct orders of the one ranked directly underneath the current leader. However, the new law states that-“

“-Royalty and the Elements over-rank all soldiers below, I know,” Solar interrupted. “But still, it’s Fluttershy, the Element of Kindess. She’s the type of pony to accidentally sit on a fly and then feel bad for the chair that she was sitting on because it’s all covered in fly goo.” Solar gave an unappreciative look at Charm.

“Wouldn’t she feel sorry for the fly?”

“Why would she feel sorry for the fly?”

“Because she just sat on it.”

“It’s a fly though. You can’t compare a fly to a nice mahogany chair.”

“Good point,” Charm admitted. “I won’t argue that the Codebook is flawed,” he went back on topic. “But if we break any of the rules there, we could get in trouble. She, unfortunately, is also the only Element of Harmony available to us. The other Elements are in different battlefields leading their own fights against the Changeling army. We have no choice. We drew the short straw.”

Solar rolled his eyes. He looked at Fluttershy who appeared to be showing the guards in the room how to make paper butterflies. As for Magnite, she still seemed to be having a romantic moment with that Rainbow Dash poster.

Solar face-hoofed. “Okay, let’s do this.”

With one quick sigh, he headed towards her. His loud steps and clinking sound of his armour sounded as he walked, making everybody in the room focus towards him. The war-torn look on his face was as terrifying as it was sexy (for Magnite). As he approached the kind Fluttershy, she locked eyes with him. She was mesmerised by the badass aura Solar was emitting. A true mark of a soldier that has went through Heaven and Tartarus to keep the Equestrian flag standing over all his might.

He unsheathed his sword with one fluid movement. The weapon perfectly exiting its scabbard to be visible once again under the dim light of the candles that surrounded the tent. He gave it to Fluttershy.

“You must lead us to victory,” he stood tall and strong, preparing to give her one piece of advice. The one thing she needed to do to ensure full annihilation of the changeling army and peace for Equestria. “Kill them all.”

Fluttershy broke down to tears as she screamed like a dying cat ready to mate on a hot summer morning.

“Nice one.” The sarcastic tone of Charm couldn’t be more obvious. “We’re in for a ride.”