There's a shadow hanging over me

by FFS

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Nightmare Moon, Princess Luna
Length: 1592

"Come and see, Luna. Come and see what wonders I can show you."

"I can see a shadow in my mirror, a reflection of me that is not myself. It torments my waking hours, laying thick upon me words of encouragement, only to snatch them away moments later with words of scorn. It hates and loves me, and I cannot tell whether it wishes greatness or death upon me. Perhaps neither. Perhaps both. It is a cruel and fickle shade that haunts me, and yet, I dare not seek help, for fear of what wrath I might provoke from it."

A story of Luna, told in the first pony perspective.

Published 2017-05-16 03:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2017-05-16 03:40:01 UTC

Now it looks as though it's here to stay

Mid-afternoon… I watch as formerly clear blue skies transform themselves into a heavy downpour. I do not recall sister saying that a rainstorm had been scheduled for this day, I will have to ask her about this sudden change later.

The dark grey clouds of the sky turn to a thick black, thunder and lightning bellow forth from the heavens, and the chill wind penetrates deep within my bones even after I close my window. This is a powerful chill, feeling more like the ice and snow of the wendigos than of the deluge outside. The storm outside is fierce and terrible, driving the ponies into their homes to wait under shelter. But I know that once the storm passes, once the rain and thunder ceases and the darkness peels away, that they will come out again to bask in the warmth of sister’s sun. Her little ponies fear the darkness and embrace the light, just as they shy away from me whilst celebrating her.

At times, it is enough to give me pause, to wonder whether I am truly fit to rule alongside my sister. Her ponies fear my darkness and shy away from my court. Am I not their co-ruler? Should I not be equally as important to them as my sister?

Strange, I can still feel that most fell of chills in the air. Perhaps the window requires fixing. I shall see to it once the storm passes.

“Luna” I hear a voice calling out to me. It is strange, otherworldly almost; and yet woven with the subtlest hints of familiarity, as though I am hearing the voice of somepony I had once known long ago. “Come and see, Luna. Come and see.”

In the corner of my eyes, I can see something; a shadow moving on the wall. “Where are you?” My own voice raises, and I hustle to make myself stand tall and regal as my eyes dart around the room for the source of the intrusive voice. “Show yourself!”

“Come and see, Luna. Come and see what wonders we can make. Come and see what wonders I can show to you.”

“By my command I, Princess Luna of Equestria, Princess of the Night, order you show yourself at once!”

“I am here, Luna, will you not come and see?”

The many shadows of my room seem to dart hither and thither, and my eyes rush to follow them, at last settling on the elegant mirror adorning my north-facing wall. In it I see a reflection. She is me, and yet not quite so. Taller she stands, and blacker than I, as though her body were cut from the very fabric of the night. Manes of bluest æther we shared, true, but those of the reflection seemed more alike to my sister’s than to my own. It was almost as though I stared into a reflection of the future, but for her eyes. Coloured like jade and with pupils slitted like those of a cat, the eyes into which I stared were not my own, indeed, I could not place them among any I had seen in all the lands.

“Do you see now, Luna?” the reflection asked. “Do you see what greatness you could be?”

“I see only a reflection in the mirror,” I say unto it. “Some trick of the light, by one of the fair folk. You are naught but an image.”

“Do not reject what you cannot grasp, Luna. I am no fae trickery. I am you, ensconced in all the greatness that you deserve.”

“I need not rely on some shade’s trickery to be great. I am Luna, Princess of Equestria. Greatness is gifted to me by the divine right of my blood.”

“Your greatness is but an illusion, a grace gifted to you by your sister. Without her you are nothing, but you need only reach out and grasp me and you can equal her.”

“My sister and I share our throne. She does not grace me with greatness any more than I unto her.”

“Because you have none to grace. Should she desire, she could remove you from the throne with nary a thought, and there would be nothing you could do about it. You are weak, and who would help you in your hour of need? The ponies who fear your night and shun your court? Do not take me for a fool, Luna. Without your sister you have nothing. You have nopony.”

“That is not true! Celestia would never betray me like that!”

“How can you be sure, Luna? Your stewardship of the throne serves only as a means to allow Celestia some hour of sleep. Anypony with enough magic to move the moon could perform your duties, and be less feared by your sister’s subjects for it than you are.”

“Silence shade, and get you gone. Do not darken my abode ever again.”

“Or what? Your threats to me are empty, Luna. I am you. Nopony can conquer themselves, least of all not one so weak as you. Do not think you can scare me with idle threats, Luna. You are weak. But you needn’t be so. Reach out, grasp me, embrace me, and your power will be that to rival even Celestia. Surpass her, even, should you desire.”

“I have no need to surpass my sister, shade, nor do I desire to. Now be silent, and get you gone. I do not wish to see you here ever again.”

“You are weak, Luna, and nopony will ever love you as weak as you are. Only by embracing me can you attain the strength that only I can see within you. Embrace me and become the mare you were born to be, the mare Celestia is afraid you will become. She suppresses you, but you can surpass her, if only you embrace me, but should you choose to reject me you shall forever remain weak. Weak and unloved, pathetic, fated to lie at Celestia’s hooves, like a dog groveling for a scrap of bone to chew.”

“I said be silent!” My hoof is sent through the mirror, sending broken shards flying in all directions. Blood drips from my ankle, staining the hardwood floor as it pools. All around my lie fragments of mirror, and before me stands the broken remnants of a heritage antique.

But as I look at the remains of my mirror, I see that the figure of the shade has not departed. Rather, it has fractured along with my mirror, and in each shard there now rests its terrifying visage.

“Come and see, Luna.”

“You are weak.”

“Pathetic.”

“Stupid.”

“Ugly.”

“Nopony loves you.”

“You should never have been born.”

“Nopony will ever love you.”

“You should just die.”

“They are all afraid of you.”

“You should kill yourself.”

“Nopony wants you.”

“Not even Celestia.”

“So they can all just die.”

Shadows. The shadows on the wall are dancing, coming to life and swirling around me. Music. I can hear music, a terrible dirge, opening the window and beckoning me closer. Cold. The chill air rushes in, bringing with it the icy rain. Wetness. I can feel the rain matting my body. It is cold, painful, penetrating to my bone.

“Go towards the window, Luna.”

“It will only take a moment.”

“Just one small jump and it will all be over.”

“Come and see, Luna.”

“Come and see what wonders I can show you.”

Slowly, against every ounce of my will, my body moves towards the open window. I struggle to resist, but my body gives me no quarter. With every step closer I feel as though I am walking deeper and deeper into a lake of inky blackness. I can feel my lungs filling up with water, setting my insides ablaze as I struggle for breath, struggle against what seems to be my inevitable fate.

“Help me... Celestia… Somepony… Anypony… HELP ME!”

Suddenly, everything stops. The wind and the rain and the shadows, swirling around me, have all vanished, replaced by a clear and sunny day. I stand before a closed window, staring out at the mid-afternoon sun as it slowly sets on the horizon. I am dry. I can breathe again. I am not moments away from jumping out of the window. I do not know for how long I stand there, utterly silent, before that silence is broken by the sound of the door opening behind me.

“Luna? I heard you calling for me, is something the matte- Oh, Luna, what happened!” The familiar voice of my sister rouses me from my stupor, and I turn to greet Celestia, seeing with all shock that my mirror is broken. Its many shards litter the floor, and the pool of my blood is right where it had been when my hoof went through the mirror.

“Oh Luna, you’re bleeding!” Celestia rushes over to me, applying a healing spell to my hoof as she wraps her wings around me. “What happened?” she asked, but in my daze I can broker her no response.

Silently, I lean my head against her neck, closing my eyes as I take in the comforting warmth of my elder sister. I am terrified to open my mouth, to reveal to Celestia the nightmare that haunted me. For the briefest moment, I am allowed to forget that horror. For the briefest moment, I think that tomorrow will be better.

“I will come and see if you are more agreeable tomorrow, Luna.”