I know that I'm the only one.
Hello, my name is Dave, and...
Uh...
Uhh...
Umm...
You know what? Fuck the intro let's just get right into this shit!
So anyways, I'm stuck here in Equestria for no damn reason, and they expect me to fit in, but they look at me weird. Like... make up your minds! I've been staying here for the past few months, and life isn't looking that swell. ~~And now I have to fap to Playcolt magazines! The horror! Oh, the horror!~~ And it's just so... stupid. Just... fucking hell, mate. Sometimes, I just want to throw a toaster on to the ocean, JUST SO I CAN ELECTROCUTE EVERYONE'S AS-
"Dave? Dave!"
I snap out of my obnoxious ranting, which I have been screeching out loud. I blinked and squinted at the levitating cyan mare in front of me. She looked annoyed.
"Oh, hey Rainbow," I greeted.
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes at me. She landed in the spot in front of me.
"Hey, I just wanna make sure that you didn't freak out right there," she said. Wow, Rainbow cares about me. Huh.
I leaned back on the park bench I was sitting on.
"No biggie," I assured.
We kinda... stayed at the same spot for a while. Awkward. I tried to strike up a conversation.
"So... what do you have planned?" I asked.
Rainbow put a hoof on her chin, thinking.
"Uh... nothing really," she answered frankly.
Nothing.
"Yeah, I'll just stay here and read something, I guess," I said.
I whipped out my overpriced iPhone and looked for some eBooks in the iBooks app. And if you're wondering, the princess was at least helpful enough to find a way to charge my phone. Sure, it's an iPhone, and I should've got the new Samsung, but at least I have this compared to nothing.
My eyes locked to a very interesting article I should read.
The Sallie House.
It isn't an eBook, but it is PDF that's about the infamous Sallie House in Atchison, Kansas. I opened it up, and I read through the article, the same one I've read for at least a hundred times.
Rainbow sat down beside me and attempted to look at my phone. I was kind enough to show her the article.
"What's that?" She was now curious.
I scrolled up for her to see a ghastly image of Sallie.
"It's an article about the Sallie House," I answered. "It's a house that has a reported demon," I added.
Rainbow's eyes narrowed at the image. "Why do you keep reading those?"
Ah, yes. I, myself read these stories all the time. It doesn't keep me up at night because they honestly entertain me. Hell, when I go to vacation I sometimes drop by some "Haunted" locations.
"Well, they're thrilling," I said. The thrills of watching a ghost come out can feel so exhilarating when you escape. And believe me, you'll always stay unharmed.
Rainbow didn't look so satisfied about the answer.
"No, really. Why?" She asked again.
I sighed.
"It's... interesting, to be honest," I stated.
Rainbow leaned back too. The silence stayed until,
"Aren't you afraid of anything?" She asked.
Well, to be frank, I am afraid of a few things.
"I mean, you went through the Everfree at night with nothing! You drink with dragons and annoy them. And you aren't afraid to embarrass yourself, too. You just, shrug it off." She stated.
Wow. She's complaining about my attitude. Okey dokey.
"Jeez, Rainbow, sorry," I apologized.
She just waved her hoof.
Actually, she does have a point. I'm not really scared of most things anymore. Maybe because the person inside me is dead.
You know what? Let's find out what I'm most afraid of.
"Hey, I have a deal for you," I said.
Her ears perked up, and she looked at me.
"If you find something I find extremely scary, then I'll do whatever you want for a day. Deal?"
I extended my hand.
She immediately went for my hand, and she shook it vigorously. She gave me a smug look.
"It's a deal," she said. Her eyes had a mischevious fire in them. Oh no, so scary.
I let go of her hand, and she suddenly points behind me. She gasps in horror.
"What's that!" She yelled at my ear.
I know what game you're playing.
I intentionally turned around, with a surprised look on my face.
"What? Where?"
I twisted my head towards Rainbow Dash. And, of course, she had a scary look on her face. She screamed like a banshee.
She continued her "scary face" for a few more seconds.
Then I did the most unforgivable crime the universe has ever seen.
I reached out and booped her nose.
She immediately recoiled while her cheeks were a hot red shade of red.
"Wh-What are you doing?" She said. She was now hovering, her forelegs covering her chest, but not in crossing them.
I smiled back.
"You look adorable."
"Are you ready, Dave?" Twilight asked. We were approaching an abandoned hospital. The sun was almost gone, and it just disappeared into the fine line that makes the horizon.
"I think so," I replied.
Twilight apparently wanted to come because she wanted to use all my equipment and "study me."
The hospital was rectangular, and it was a three-storey building. The two wings looked exactly the same from the central main building.
All the windows were either broken or removed, and you can smell the... piss.
The main doors were already open, the glass doors cracked.
Twilight abruptly halted, eyeing the abandoned hospital. I looked back at her.
"Hey, are you sure you wanna do this?" I asked.
Twilight shook her head. "No, I'll go," she said slowly.
I shot a dashing smile and I waved my hand to the pair of doors.
"Ladies first," I teased.
Twilight frowned. "Nah, you go." She adjusted my camcorder and she adjusted her headlamp. My camcorder had Generation 2 night vision.
I stepped inside the dark space, then switched on my flashlight. The ray of light illuminated a small spot on the floor. The ray panned around the room as I rotated it. Another beam of light could be seen, which came from Twilight. The hospital was dirty, and mold was growing everywhere. Some tiles on the floor were broken. In the distance, I could see a desk, with the wooden top rotting.
"So... this is what Rainbow wanted us to see, eh?" I said.
Twilight nodded. "Apparently," she said.
I snorted out loud. I wanted to play tonight. "HEY! Ghosts! Come here right now and fight me like a ma-"
Twilight pulled me back with her magic.
She let go of me. I looked at her incredulously. "Twily, what the hell?"
She glared at me. She made be kneel down so our eyes met. "Don't do that!" She ordered.
I rolled my eyes and stood up. I turned around. "Yeah, yeah. Let's get a move on," I said while cackling.
I heard an angry grunt.
Our beams of light moved through the darkness once again until I found a staircase. There was a dirty old sign with fading letters.
2nd Storey Morgue
Operating Rooms
I look back to Twilight. "Let's go to the morgue," I whispered. What? It advances the plot.
What Twilight did not know was that Rainbow Dash was in the same building.
What I do know is that she is in this building, ready to kick my ass.
Pinkie was jumping up and down, clearly hyperactive. Rainbow Dash made her stay still, and much to her dismay, she kept bouncing.
"Pinkie, sit down!" Dash scolded, keeping her voice quiet.
Pinkie hopped a few times before she finally stopped. "Oops, sorry dash. It's just that we're finally pranking Dave!" She exclaimed.
Rainbow Dash shushed Pinkie. "Yeah, yeah. Just tell me when he's here, okay?" she commanded.
Pinkie enthusiastically nodded her head. "Okey-dokey," she chirped.
Rainbow walked out of the room they were in, the room illuminated by a lantern they brought.
Rainbow and Pinkie were on the second floor, Pinkie Pie being in the OR. The morgue was down the hall, and the staircase right before that.
Rainbow Dash pulled out a pair of fangs, which were a prop. She stuffed them in the upper jaw. She also took out a bottle of fake blood, and she showered it all over her body.
She looked scarier now. She looked so bloody that her blue coat turned red. Only a few spots of her coat and mane were visible.
She heard footsteps from the bottom of the stairs.
She trotted down the hall towards the OR in where Pinkie was.
"Pinkie, put on your costume, now!" She whispered.
Pinkie's costume was a skeleton. She already had the costume on, the glow in the dark bones glowing green. She only had to put on the mask.
She produced the mask, and she slipped it on.
"I'm ready, Dashie!" She said, her voice muffled.
Rainbow grinned maniacally.
"Alright, let's go."
Twilight and I were going up the staircase. I started to grow bored, and I started to sing my favorite rhymes I found on the internet.
"Roses are red,
Dieting makes you thinner,
Big black teen creampies teacher
to get back his fidget spinner."
Twilight's head turned back, trying to make sure there weren't any ghosts or something.
We reached the top, and there were more signs now.
Operating Rooms
Morgue
"Let's go to the morgue first," Twilight said. I gave her some way, and now she was leading the way. The hospital was completely empty and eerily quiet. It's... peaceful.
Twilight stopped in front of a room with the label on the side.
The Morgue.
I twisted the knob, and to my utter surprise, it opened. I pushed the door, it creaking.
"Needs some WD-40," I noted.
I adjusted my flashlight so it would shine more light on a larger area. There were body fridges on the two sides of the room. I stepped inside, growing closer to one of the mortuaries. Twilight was behind me, and she was just watching. She wasn't actually writing on her notepad. We were now directly in front of a door.
"Should I open it?" I ask.
Twilight look hesitant. "I don't know," she answered frankly. The camcorder was pointing towards the door.
I gingerly clutched the door of the fridge. I pulled the door, and...
Nothing.
Of course.
I look back to Twilight.
"See, nothing," I reassured.
Twilight still looked weary.
"The fact that ponies' bodies were stored here before identification is creepy," she whispered.
I closed the door.
"Yeah, it's kinda creepy," I said.
"Let's go," Twilight whispered to me.
We were headed for the door, but I swore I heard some high pitch chuckling. I swore I also saw some movement.
We both stopped in our tracks.
I looked down to Twilight, and she looked up to me.
"Did you hear that?" Her voice was barely audible.
"Yeah, I did," I said, not whispering.
"I-Is it my mind playing with me?" She asked.
I shrugged. "Probably," I answered. "I mean, when you squint in darkness... you start to, uh, see movement in that darkness," I said.
"Your mind fills the blanks," I added. I figured that Twilight would know this, but she probably asked because she wanted my comfort.
"I'll go first, does that sound good?"
Twilight nodded. She positioned the camcorder so it was pointing towards me. I looked at the doorway that leads to a black abyss.
"Alright, here we go."
I walked towards the void, and my flashlight wobbled as I walked.
I was now inside the darkness itself, and my flashlight beam was going down the hall.
"Anyone who wants their presence known, push me down," I called down the hallway. My voice echoed down the hall. I heard a few footsteps to my right, and Twilight was beside me now.
Silence.
Nothing.
Absolutely nothi-
THUMP.
I fell forwards, tumbling down. Twilight went down to help me up. "Oh my gosh, are you alright?" She sounded worried. I groaned. "Y-yeah," I said. I was up and a scratched the back of my head. We looked around the hallway behind us.
"But who pushed me?" I asked.
Twilight rotated my camcorder around, trying to catch the elusive specter that "pushed me."
"I don't know," she slowly said, trying her best not to sound petrified.
I picked up my flashlight, which was more powerful than Twilight's headlamp. Wait... if I can see it in my camcorder...
"Twi, let's see if we got anything in the camcorder," I said.
She gave me my camcorder, and I stopped the recording. I also turned off my flashlight.
I went to the video file, and I played it. It displayed itself on the screen. I kneeled so Twilight could see too. I scrubbed through the end of the video, and sure enough, there I was, being knocked out.
"Alrighty, let's slow it down."
I scrubbed back a few seconds backward, and I scrubbed it very slowly. There was no audio, but we can see the video clearly.
On the screen, I fell down again, and it looked like a... skeleton?
"It's... a skeleton?" Twilight sounded more confused than scared.
The skeleton glowed in the dark with a green color, and the body shape looked like a mare's.
"Apparently," I said.
My eyes were drawn to the corridor. I then remembered what Rainbow told me. I fished for a small, blue rubber ball in my pocket while I'm still kneeling. I bounced the ball a few times. Twilight obviously was clueless.
"What?" That was only she could say.
I bounced the ball once more before I clutched it. "Rainbow told me that if I threw a ball down any dark hallway in this hospital, the ghost will move the ball," I said.
Twilight squinted at the black void. She continued this for a minute.
"When you stare at the darkness, Twilight, it will stare back," I said.
She looked back up at me. Her face was devoid of any emotion.
I wanted to throw the ball so bad. I'm sure that Rainbow Dash was the "skeleton" who pushed me. The giggling did sound like Pinkie's, so maybe she's involved in this too.
I gave the ball to Twilight.
"Throw it," I said.
Twilight was eyeing me with a disgusted look.
"What? Why?!" She scowled and whispered.
I smirked back.
"Because when we find a ghost we'll be rich and famous," I said.
She still didn't look convinced.
I just gave her a little wink.
"Besides, you'll be in the history books," I added with the same manner a car salesman would use.
After a moment of consideration, she finally gave in. She gave me the camcorder, and she grabbed the rubber ball with her purple aura. I don't want to say it's magic.
She prepared herself, and I started another recording. The night vision is on, and I saw the empty corridor in green.
I focused on Twilight, who was taking deep breaths.
"He likes balls too," I said with chastity.
She shot me a glare before speaking.
"G-ghost, I-I heard you like balls," she stuttered.
I couldn't keep myself from laughing, and I started to cackle. I pinched the bridge of my nose as I continued. Twilight also started to giggle.
"I-I swear I'm not doing this on purpose," she managed.
We stood there, laughing for a few moments before we looked back at the corridor again. Our expressions were now serious.
"Okay, I'm going to throw the ball," she said.
I nodded.
Twilight bounced the ball on the floor once more. She threw the ball down the hall. I squinted at the screen of my camcorder, and I saw the ball go down the hall. It bounced a few extra times before it stopped. Twilight, on the other hand, was trying her best to squint at the darkness, with the aid of my headlamp.
Suddenly, a flying figure appeared. It was a pegasus, and she had blood on her. My heart started to race until I notice the few spots of her mane and coat. A familiar blue coat, and a familiar rainbow mane. I poked Twilight in the head. She jumped a bit, and I motioned her to look at my screen. I signaled her to stay quiet with my hand.
And she saw the familiar cute, cyan pony that was picking up the ball.
"It's Rainbow Dash," I whispered.
Twilight nodded. She must've felt more embarrassed than scared now.
"Wow..." She trailed off.
"I knew it," I said.
Twilight and I felt very awkward now. Twilight leaned closer. "So... what do we do know?" She said.
I smiled back, shooting her with a devilish grin. "We act like they're absolutely nothing," I said.
Twilight grinned back. "Two can play at this game," she said.
I glanced at the camcorder, and know Rainbow Dash was spray painting something on the floor in where the ball was at. And the ball was exactly beside a door.
"Looks life they're planning a jumpscare," I said. I showed Twilight the green colored screen. "They put it beside some door," I said.
"Oh, I see," she said.
I face her fully now, our faces a few inches away from each other. I stare into her oversized eyes as I formulated a plan. "Alright, here's the plan. We're going to go to that ball, and when they jumpscare us, which they will, then just chill," I said.
Twilight nodded in understanding.
I stood right back up at my full height, and we proceeded through the corridor. I turn on my flashlight that was off a while ago. I gave Twilight my camcorder.
"Alright, we're ah' coming," I said, my voice echoing and resonating through the silent space.
We pass by a few rooms, some of them with doors wide open. Maybe there are ghosts in here? Like, real ones?
Only God knows.
Pinkie was looking out the door, which had a blue ball that was just outside. The ball just arrived.
Rainbow was beside her, waiting in anticipation as she waits for her prey to get the bait.
"Ya ready, Pinkie?" Dash asked with determination.
Pinkie nodded. "Yep."
As time went on, they can hear the footsteps of the human and the purple princess.
Dave and Twilight were now just outside the doorway, and they were looking down at the ball.
Now it is time.
Predator versus prey.
Twilight and I were now looking down at the ball, and there were these words below it.
Twilight x Dave
My head shot upward.
"Fuck off," I remarked to no one.
Twilight examined the ball and graffiti. It looked as if it were a title to some fanfiction you would find on the internet.
I snapped out of my thoughts, and scanned around my surroundings, but I avoided the doorway.
My flashlight beam stopped as I looked at the graffiti on the wall. It was different in color and writing, and I was genuinely confused. Then a cracked up. It said,
I love pot.
"Twilight, come here," I commanded. Twilight came over and looked at the spot I was pointing at with my other hand. She started to laugh too.
"Well, it looks like this ghost likes to blaze it," I said.
We stared at the masterpiece before...
AAAAAHHHHH
Pinkie and Rainbow jumped in front of us, trying to look as scary as possible. The sounds that escaped their mouths were supposed to be sounds of agony and fright, but they look and sound too adorable.
I waved my hand, and Twilight did too.
"Oh hey, Rainbow," I greeted.
They stopped and stared.
"What?" The pony with the blood and fangs said.
I look over to the glow in the dark skeleton.
"Oh, and hey, Pinkie," I greeted.
The skeleton grabbed the top of the mask, and it pulled it out, Scooby-Doo style.
"Hello, Dave!" She greeted me enthusiastically.
The "vampire" shot her an angry look of annoyance. "Pinkie, no! We're supposed to scare them, remember!" She scolded.
Pinkie put a hoof to her mouth and gasped. "Oh, yeah!" She remembered.
Rainbow just face hoofed.
"*sigh* Whatever," she said plainly.
I was just standing there like a complete douche.
"Yeah, so... you're not scared?" Rainbow was holding on. I'm gonna have to tell her my honest answer.
"Hell no," I gleefully answered.
Rainbow Dash did not look gleeful.
"Are you afraid of anything?" She growled.
I actually thought of that. Hmmm, what am I afraid of?
"I think he's afraid of spiders," she said.
Oh God no.
I glared at Twilight.
Oh God, please.
Twilight looked behind me. She looked back, and she smiled at me with fire in her eyes. "Look behind you, at the corner" she whispered.
God, why did you do this to me?
I turned around slowly.
In the corner, there was a spider. A massive one.
God, smite me down now.
"Oh, Dave, why didn't you tell us?" Pinkie's voice was... despicable.
I stepped back in horror as the eight-legged beast moved.
Oh shit.
I fell back, as the spider seemed to get near me. It moved towards me.
I look around the room, and I realise that there are at least 10 spiders.
I let out my loudest death screech.
I stood up with a speed of a cheetah, and I finally escaped. I ran for my sanity, no, my life. I ran out the door, not caring if Twilight was with me. I ran out the hospital entrance, and I'm finally on the green fields that were before the hospital.
I collapsed, and I caught my breath.
Well, at least nobody there was to recor-
Wait.
Oh shit.
I immediately shot up, remembering Twilight was recording the whole thing.
"OH FUCK!" I ran to the hospital like a motherfucker.
I was almost in the hospital, and suddenly Rainbow Dash was in front of me.
"Rainbow, where's Twilight?" I asked quickly.
She grinned and produced my camcorder.
Oh God no.
I jumped up, but I couldn't reach her. Don't do this to me!
She giggled. "Are you looking for this?" She teased, waving the camera around.
I nodded my head. "Yes! Give it to me!" I yelled.
She shook her head. "Nah ah ah," she said. "You're gonna have to do me one tiny thing for me first," she said. She was clearly enjoying herself. "You promised."
I stopped my jumping. "Please... don't," I muttered.
Rainbow put a hoof on her mouth to stop her giggling.
"Oh, you don't have to worry," she reassured. For a second I thought I was gonna be fine. "I'll only show it to a small audience," she extended my camcorder.
Well, fuck me.
Wait... don't.
The Elements of Harmony were giggling girlishly.
"Oh darling, you should see the look on your face!" Rarity exclaimed.
We were in the Castle of Friendship's Throne room, them sitting down on their respective chairs. I was sitting on Spike's chair.
Rarity passed the camcorder to Twilight, but before she took it a snatched it.
"Fucking asshats," I muttered.
The girls just giggled.
"Ah', come on Dave, it's not that bad," Applejack said.
I rolled my eyes and I rested my head on my palm.
"Yeah, Dave, don't be so down!" Pinkie said.
I ignored them. I looked over to Rainbow Dash, who had the largest shit-eating grin I have ever seen.
"I'll get you next time," I said.
Rainbow Dash just kept her grin.
"Sure you will."
Author's Note
So... you passed through my little story I made, huh?
Well, anyways, thanks for reading my story here. I'll be updating my other story next. If you have any problems you yourself would like to point out to me, then shoot.
Goodbye for now, by the way.
