I honestly can’t say I’ve ever been this anxious since I first arrived in Equestria. Sounds weird, I know, but I still can’t believe how great my time here has been and how accommodating the ponies have been to me.
Especially Starlight.
To think it’s been a full year since I went from being her lab rat to one of her closest friends. Sounds a bit demeaning; lab rat. But hey, I’m the one who came up with that little moniker in the first place. After all, Twilight wanted me to stay with her for the purpose of studying friendship, whatever that means.
Though seriously, whatever experiment Starlight was supposed to conduct on, or should I say, with me has been a resounding success. I’ve really grown to appreciate Starlight’s companionship, and I can tell that she really likes me. The fact that she even wanted to commemorate our first anniversary since we started our–
You know what, I won’t call this thing an experiment. I’ll just say it’s our first anniversary since we started living together, but I digress.
A couple of days ago, she mentioned that it’s been a year since we started living together, and that she wanted to celebrate with something special, and truth of the matter is, I’m scared as hell.
I don’t know what she could possibly be surprising me with, but I just got off of work at Rarity’s boutique, and I’m outside the door of our house right now, and I just have to open it and step inside to find out. Well, let’s see where this goes.
I step inside, and immediately, I’m greeted with the smell of toasted cheese and garlicky tomato sauce. Did she really…?
“Anon!” Starlight’s voice called from upstairs. “Come up!”
Well, there’s no use delaying what I can tell is going to be an awesome meal. I go up the stairs by twos until I’m standing in the dining room/kitchen where Starlight has just pulled a freshly baked pizza from the oven. With it resting safely on the counter, she galloped toward me.
“Anon!” she cried, throwing her body onto mine and hugging her arms around my neck.
I catch her and wrap my arms around her stomach and set my hands on the small of her back. God, I love how warm her coat is against my fingers and the side of my neck. I tenderly begin to move my hand just above the base of her tail when she suddenly slides off me. I simply look thankful to see her there, and I am.
“Sit down, Anon,” she said. “I made your favorite!”
And make my favorite she did. Mushroom and cheese pizza. A favorite staple of my former life and world. Though it wouldn’t quite be complete without some sausage or pepperoni, I couldn’t fault her for making what she could.
As she went back to the counter, I slid my jacket off my back and hung it on the back of my chair, sitting down in it just as Starlight came over with two large slices on a plate, the crusts just barely keeping from folding over the side.
She sat herself down to my left as she put her plate down and raised a bottle of red, pouring me a glass.
“Wow,” I said, looking blessedly at my meal “you really outdid yourself. This was a really nice surprise.”
Starlight couldn’t stifle a giggle underneath the bottom of her hoof. “This isn’t the surprise. I just thought tonight should be really special, and I know how much you’ve been craving a pizza.”
“And I can’t thank you enough– not just for the pizza, but… for everything.”
“Well what are you waiting for? Dig in!”
She set a knife and fork out between where my plate would be. Typically, I wouldn’t hesitate to pick up one of those slices, fold it in, and chow down, but she clearly wanted this to be a nice meal, and I didn’t have the heart nor the mind to sully any of the work she put into it.
I picked up my untensils, cut up a small enough bite I knew I could fit in my mouth, and pulled the piece off my fork with my lips.
“Wait, Anon?” I looked to her, my eyes open wide with fear that I screwed something up. “You don’t want any cheese or peppers?”
She hovered over two glass shakers with parmesan cheese and red pepper flakes to me. God dammit, I love you. I took both in my hand and vibrated them over my two slices, careful to get them nowhere outside my plate. Once I was satisfied with the cheese to pepper ratio, I held them back out for her to use.
“Thank you,” I said breathily.
“No problem,” she said, shaking her own on her pizza. “I think I know you enough pretty well now.”
She got that right. Finally, I could enjoy my meal. I cut another bite and ate. Yep. Much better with parm and peppers. From the corner of my eye, I see the light-blue aura of Starlight’s magic hover in front of me. Looking up, she held her wine glass up.
“Here’s to one wonderful year,” she said.
“Amen,” I respond, lifting my glass.
With a harmonious clink of the bowls of our glasses, we each took a sip and continued our dinner.
The plates and glasses are drying in the sink, the table’s been cleared and wiped, and there’s still a couple of pizza slices left on the cutting board on the counter. Starlight and I are just relaxing on the couch, her body leaned against mine as she lies upon her side. I keep her up with my body leaning into hers, my head holding hers up.
I really don’t see this night going any other way now. I just think of everything we’ve been through. Our first meeting, our first conversations over dinner, our first hangout and meet-up with Trixie and Thorax… our first kiss.
Yep. It’s time now.
I pet her down her shoulder to her hip as I turn my head to whisper in her ear. “I have a little surprise for you too.”
She gets a little bit off of me as I shift up and reach into my back pocket. I was sure to make sure it took the place of my wallet. Without her seeing it, I conceal it beneath the right of my buttocks.
“Starlight,” I say, “I have to tell you that this has been amazing. I mean, not just tonight. Just… this whole year. I never really got to know what it feels like back in my old world, and I never thought I’d be saying this, yet alone thinking this so quickly, but… I… I think I love you, Starlight.”
“You…” Starlight shifted back away from me, “love me, Anon?”
“Yeah. I really do.”
I could see Starlight was on the verge of tears as her smile grew wider. I knew it. And now I had the strength to pull the box up and hold it up to her. From her choking gasp and her falling back to the other side of the couch, she already knew.
“Starlight…” She rolled up and slowly crawled up to me. “You have been amazing to me, and even though we’re a completely different species, I can not think of anyone else from my world or this one that I would spend every waking moment with other than you. So please, Starlight Glimmer, will you–”
“YES!” Starlight tackles me down, and I sink into the cushion as she smothers me with her embrace.
I’m practically choking on her shoulder as she continues digging her head past mine. Finally, she settles down and begins kissing my face. With each time her lips leave mine, a little more of her tongue begins to push into my mouth. I then notice her grinding her waist against my crotch, and I feel a shiver run from it and over my entire body.
“Whoa, whoa, Starlight,” I say with a gentle shove. “What are you doing?”
“Oh, sorry…” She straightens her mane and won’t dare look me in the eye. “It’s just hearing you say that… I mean, it just makes me more excited to share my surprise with you!”
That’s right. She also had something planned. “What is it, then?”
Reaching behind her, she pulls out a small, but long red cardboard box with green ribbons tying it together. I remove the ribbons and open the box, utterly perplexed by what’s inside. I even pull it out put it close to my face, unsure if I still believe it.
A pregnancy test? What?
“Starlight. What–”
“I know, I know, this is really weird, and I don’t know why I’d even be doing this not knowing you were going to propose, but… I also don’t want to be without you, Anon. I love you so very much, and it may not look it, but I’ve spent a bit of time thinking about this, but yes… I want to have kids with you.
“Even I know that there’s still engagement and marriage, but even before you proposed to me, I was so certain that I wanted to be with you that I knew that I wanted to do this with you.”
“Starlight, hold on! How would this even work? We’re completely different–”
“I realize this. But please, you have to trust me. Do you trust me, Anon?”
While my answer will certainly not be “no,” I know that a simple yes is also not a proper answer. But as she lowers her face to mine, her puppy-dog eyes overtaking my entire vision, I find that yes was becoming more of the right thing to say in this moment.
“Yes..” I hear my voice whisper. “Yes, I trust you.”
Her mouth locks onto mine again, and she resumes her grinding. I already had little to no space on this couch of ours, and I knew we had to get out of here. I sit myself up with all the strength my abs could muster with this pony latched onto me, and I stand myself up, cradling her rump in my arms.
We continue making out as I walk us to the bedroom. Now I would be on top. I gently set her down on her back on the mattress of our bed, and I begin unbuttoning my shirt as I continue kissing her.
My eyes are closed as I see her horn light up, shining through my eyelids. Suddenly, her aura floats onto me and covers me head to toe. I step back as a tingling sensation washes over my body.
Between Starlight laying there with her legs wide open and the energy that must have been coursing through my bones, I feel so incredibly turned on. I feel myself getting hard, but I’m getting a little off put by how quickly I feel the tightness in the front of my pants.
It only gets tighter and tighter from there, and I undo the button and zipper on my pants, letting my erection spring up inside my underwear, where it continues pushing until the leg bands begin digging into my thighs. With a little difficulty, I manage to slip my underwear off to reveal my ever enlarging–
–AND GEORGE WASHINGTON WITH DIARRHEA RUNNING OUT OF HIS PANTS ON TOP THAT HORSE.
(BANG)
MARCH INTO KICKASS!
(BANG)
MARCHIN NOT TO GIVE UP!
(BANG)
TAKE IN ACTION! THAT’S WHO WE COME FROM!
AND WE LET ALL THESE HUNCHBACK SCUM RULE US.
I WILL NEVER SUBMIT 2 U!
(inhale)
AND THE HUMAN SPIRIT ISRISING!
YOU WILL NOT TURN US INTO ANIMALS! YOU WILL NOT POISON US ANYMORE!YOU WILL NOT KILL–
–feel the transformation run from my thighs and start spreading over my body. I quickly begin to pull my shirt off my back and stomp my pants and underwear off as my legs bend and curve into a more equine shape. Just as my pants are around my ankles, my hips throw me forward to my new poise.
I catch myself on the bed, just to see as my arms are now growing short deep-blue fur from my elbows down to my arms. As the fur gets to my hand, my fingers begin curling into fists all on their own as the skin melded like chewing gum and then harden into hooves. I could tell the same thing was happening to my feet as they too curled up and soon felt of nothing.
I then feel a pull on my face and the tips of my ears as both stretch out, my ears becoming long and pointed and my nose and mouth jutting out and forming a squarer muzzle. I instinctively stand to my feet and try to feel my new pony face with my hands–
Oh yeah, hooves, and because of them, I can only feel the firm hard surface of them against my now sensitive nose. I suddenly begin losing balance on my, well, back hooves, and find myself falling backward, only to be caught by Starlight’s magic and placed back on my fours.
“Starlight,” I gasp. “What have you done?”
“I placed a temporary transformation spell on you.” She rolls to her side and squeezes the back her thighs together to accompany her sultry voice. “Now you’re a pony just like me. And that means…”
Starlight, you dirty genius. I hop on top of her, and while she playfully fights it, I manage to slip myself inside her hot, moist–
–YEEAAAAAAAAAAAGGGH!!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGH!
WE KNOW WE’RE UNDER ATTACK!
WE KNOW IT!
WE’RE BREAKING THE CONDITIONING!
YAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGH!
RRRRRRGGGGGGH!
WE’RE COMING FOR YOU, GLOBALISTS!
(chest) (chest) (chest) (chest) (chest) (chest) (chest) (chest) (chest)
RRRRR, COMIN’ FOR YA! COMIN’ FOR YA!
“–is wonderful!” Starlight moans.
I slowly kiss her down her neck, across her chest, inch by inch. My lips smack her belly and continue moving down to her loins, and once I’m there, I ever so teasingly slip my tongue–
–GIVE ME A BREAK. YOU THINK I’M UGUH– I’M LIKE, UGH, SHOCKED BY IT, SO I’M UP THERE BASHING IT BECAUSE I DON’T LIKE GAY PEOPLE?
I DON’T LIKE ‘EM PUTTING CHEMICALS IN THE WATER THAT TURN THE FRICKIN' FROGS GAY!
DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?
(slam) (slam) (slam)
URGH! URGH! JUZZIS CRAP!
I’M SICK OF BEING SOCIAL ENGINEERED, IT’S NOT FUNNY–
–rubbing my face up her stomach and onto her chest, and she hugs me tight. She wants me back in so bad, I can feel it, and I think it’s time that we finish this. I think she feels this too. She wants the moment of truth so bad.
She twists over back onto her stomach, and I lunge forward to caress her from behind, the warmth of her back giving my equine belly heat. I feel her tail twitching against my cheeks. She’s not just inviting me in, she’s demanding I come in. I move back, whole underside petting her down.
Once I’m back far enough, her legs spread wide, and with sudden feeling of weightlessness one feels coming over the first hill on a roller coaster, I plunge my–
–I’M A PIONEER! I’M AN EXPLORER!
I’M A HUMAN, AND I’M CUMMIN’!
(pause)
I’M ANIMATED! I’M ALIVE! MY HEART’S BIG! IT’S GOT HAHT BLUD! GOIN’ THROUGH IT FAST!
I LIKE TO FIGHT TOO!
I LIKE TO EAT! I LIKE TO HAVE CHILDREN!
I’M HERE!
I’VE GOT A LIFEFORCE!
THIS IS A HUMAN! THIS IS WHAT WE LOOK LIKE! THIS IS WHAT WE ACT LIKE! THIS IS WHAT EVERYBODY WAS LIKE BEFORE US!
THIS IS WHAT I AM! IMMA THROWBACK! I’M HERE! I’VE GOT THE FIRE OF HUMAN LIBERTY! I’M SETTIN’ FIRES EVERYWHERE! AND HUMANS ARE TURNING ON EVERYWHERE!
I’m spooning with Starlight now. The deed has been done, and as promised, I suddenly feel my body return to its former self. My hooves that have been rubbing her belly begin to soften and pull apart to give me back my hands and fingers, allowing me to feel the smooth fur that will feel plump in several month’s time.
My pony chin which has been resting on her shoulder sinks back in and my ears start feeling smaller. My flatter face then rests behind Starlight’s neck, allowing me to softly and silently smell her perfume.
Now all that’s left of my latest body is my tail, which I feel begin to recede back into my lower back. Such a shame too. That really was pretty awesome. As a human, I now have a lot of questions and concerns.
When should we tell Twilight and her friends? When should we have the wedding? Is pre-marital–
Starlight rolls over, her fur rubbing against my naked stomach and legs, and she looks at me in those shimmering blue eyes. I pull her close so now her chest touches mine. I’ve never felt so warm and so loved than I do right now.
Maybe I’ll save those questions until tomorrow morning.
