Who's Trump?

by HannahSparkles

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Slice of Life, Equestria Girls
Length: 873

Sunset Shimmer hears her friends complaining or praising a man named Trump, but who is he? She's never heard of him.

It's been months and weeks since the election and Sunset was uninvolved in the politics of the world. She was too busy studying for the upcoming finals at school to know anything about it. Now all she hears is complaints and praise surrounding a man named Trump…but…who is he? She asks.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2017-05-24 02:27:32 UTC

I Really Want To Know!

"Trump knows what he's doing, Dash. Just accept it an' move on."

"Seriously Applejack?! He's an idiot!"

"Yer just mad cause Hilary didn't win. Aren't ya?"

Sunset entered the room to see a strange quarrel between her friends. It was unusual. She quickly stepped between her friends and looked at them both. "What's the problem this time? Guitar string broke? Rarity is late?"

"Trump won and Applejack thinks that's a good thing! Even though one of her cousins is GAY." Rainbow Dash shouted.

"Fer the last time, Rainbow. He ain't gonna zap the gays, yer listening to the media too much." Applejack snarled back.

"Are you crazy?! He's a racist and xenophobic nitwit!"

"Like the liar and cheat named Hilary woulda done better!"

"WAIT!" Shouted Sunset. "Who the heck is Trump?"

Her friends stared at her, dumbfounded. The duo exchanged a glance then pounced on the chance to share their thoughts.

"He's a bigot who believes any girl can be grabbed by the pussy!" Rainbow says quickly.

"He's a reasonable businessman who plans to fix the healthcare system." Applejack rebuttals.

"He wants to deport all immigrants."

"He wants to deport the ILLEGAL immigrants. The one's who entered by visa are fine."

"He's a misogynistic pig!"

"He's a good man."

Sunset looked at them with a load of confusion. Then asked Fluttershy, who had been sitting off to the side this whole time. "Which one of them is right?"

Fluttershy responded with, "Neither. I thought Bernie should've won the presidency."

"Who is that?" Sunset asked.

"A man who wanted to make healthcare more available for the average citizen." She responded.

"Oh. He seems cool. This Trump guy has a mixed reception, you know?" Sunset says.

Rainbow rolls her eyes, "Trump's a white man with a lot of power."

Rarity scoffed, she just entered and found herself in the conversation as well. "Darling that apart tan isn't white, that Cheeto color. He's like an apricot's inside."

"And apricots are sweet, ya know." Applejack announces.

"Applejack, dear, you must be joking. Hilary stood for the rights of us all and you tossed that away."

"So did Bernie. And Hilary cheated to beat him. That meanie." Fluttershy whispers.

"Who cares about Bernie. He lost, boo hop. Let's focus on Trump. Applejack here thinks he's a good guy!" Rainbow shouts.

"What about Cruz, Stein, and Johnson?" Pinkie asks, appearing from practically nowhere.

"Pinkie this is about Trump and Rainbow's ignorance to admit that he's a good man." Applejack proclaims.

Sunset looks at them all, confused. Not sure what is good or bad about any of the people they are talking about.

"Bitches please, we all know who really should've won!" Said a familiar girl at the door.

"Trixie, what the heck are you doing here?" Rainbow growls.

"Complaining that Trixie has not won the presidency in the country. The great and powerful should be in that seat, not a piece of trash like that ugly mutt."

Applejack was beyond annoyed. "Trixie, I will personally gouge your eye out with a rusty paper clip if ya don't leave!"

Trixie bolted away. And the five girls proceeded to debate the true president. While Sunset thought and thought about what was said.

"WAIT!" She shouted. "If Trump's a jerk, Hilary is a liar, and Bernie's a joke. Then who's actually meant tone in charge?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Said a new voice in the room. Twilight Sparkle. "Jill Stein."

"Yer kidding."

"Twilight are you dumb?!"

"Seriously?"

"Darling, no."

"That is wrong, if you don't !Ind me saying."

Twilight laughed, "Oh but it's true. She was the one who wanted a recount. Therefore she should have won. Right?"

Twilight then launched into a very detailed explanation of  Jill should've won, with dozens of interruptions from her friends. This was her time to share her ideas on the politics of the country. But when she finished the group seemed to be even more divided.

"I still think Trump was the better choice." Said Applejack

"Hilary did it right!" Said Rainbow and Rarity in unison.

"Bernie was the best option..." Fluttershy whispered.

"I still thought Cruz was Adele." Exclaimed Pinkie.

Sunset thought about it even harder and stood up. Looked at all her friends and said. "I think you are all dumb bitches. I see a clear victor."

"Who?" They all ask.

"The great and powerful Dumba- I mean TRIXIE!" She said with a joyous look on her face. Trixie poked her head into the room.

"I heard my name." She said.

"There's our proper president!" Sunset cheered, "I should've voted!"

Trixie ran away again, ready to conquer the next electoral cycle, meanwhile the group beat Sunset until she was literally shaking. Almost as bad as you'd expect. She later made a tumblr and spammed positive lights and feminism everywhere to make herself fit in. And became a viral hit for being so weird and so dumb, she also secretly uses her jewelry as weapons. We now see her getting featured in videos by Blaire White, ShoeOnHead, RageAfterStorm, and ABitOBritt. Trust me, you don't want to see them she's getting hardcore wrecked by these girls and it's hysterical. On second thought, you should see this stuff its great!

The End.