Starlight Glimmer looked at the note in her hoof.
It was less of a note, actually, and more of an invitation. Golden lining, sparkling trim, bold ink, and cordial language requesting Starlight's presence at the... "Carousel Boutique".
Complete with directions, too. Thank goodness. They weren't complex, because Ponyville wasn't complex, but she was grateful for them just the same. Starlight finished following the map's instructions, and looked up.
The fanciest building she'd ever laid eyes on in her life stood in front of her. It was so incredibly... pink. And ornate. And indeed, it also looked like a certain amusement park attraction. She chuckled, shook her head, then strode forward and knocked on the door.
After not getting an answer, she noticed a sign to the side of the door which read, "Walk In To Be Served." Gingerly, she turned the knob and let herself in.
The boutique was empty. Well, not empty empty—it certainly looked like a functioning place where ponies conducted fashionable business. There were chairs, stands, mirrors, changing screens—everything Starlight imagined a true boutique would have. Starlight sighed. They'd had a "boutique" in her old town, of course. They'd sold the same burlap bags to everypony.
As Starlight walked further, she spied a desk to the side, containing various books, scraps of fabric, and a photo album. A spool of rainbow-colored thread caught her eyes as well, along with a framed picture of Rarity with her pony friends and Spike, and yet another framed picture of Rarity with a cream-colored mare Starlight didn't recognize.
The boutique, however, was completely devoid of ponies. Briefly she wondered just how said boutique managed to stay in business if said boutique owner, or at least said boutique's sales associates, weren't around—
"You're here! Oh, how absolutely splendid!"
Starlight barely had time to blink before she saw Rarity rush out from the back room, run up to Starlight, and take hold of her hooves.
"Darling, it's so absolutely good to see you! How are you? Did you sleep well last night?"
"Um..." Starlight managed, her brain trying to keep up.
"Pssh," Rarity said, waving a hoof. "Of course you did, look at you—you look absolutely fabulous! And please note, that is one of my catchphrases, which I don't usually say until I'm done with a pony." A mischievous glint appeared in Rarity's eyes for exactly one moment. "Truly, I commend you for coming prepared."
Rarity stepped back and curtsied. "Welcome to Carousel Boutique. Where everything is chic, unique, and magnifique!" Rarity coughed. "That's the other catchphrase. I usually wait for ponies to request my services, but I watched weeks go by with you staying in the castle and I simply couldn't wait anymore!" Rarity trilled with excited squeals.
Starlight did her best to catch her breath. "I will say your rather elegant invitation was... unexpected."
"For you, perhaps, but for me, I don't think I went far enough!" Rarity sank into a nearby chair, putting her hoof over her head. "Back when we visited your old town, it was easy for me to pick the lone mare with the eye for fashion out of that utterly drab crowd. No offense meant, of course, because that crowd was actually full of very nice ponies, but only one of you had an eye for style. And 'my goodness', I said, 'it's such an utter a shame we have to fight her! Cruel fate, how you taunt me so!'"
Rarity leapt out of the chair, and grabbed Starlight's hooves again.
"But now I don't! I can do what I've always wanted—to help you smile and shine for yourself. But that's the end goal past all end goals. Right now, Starlight Glimmer, I have but one simple question, and I want you to answer it absolutely truthfully."
Rarity placed her hooves on Starlight's shoulders and looked into her eyes.
"Starlight Glimmer: how many heads do you want to turn? How many ponies do you wish to worship the ground you walk on, without having to lift a hoof or say a single word?"
Starlight forced herself to think back to the past. Back to preaching on podiums. Back to begging ponies to listen to her. Back to yelling at a misguided town populace. Back to constantly looking for ponies who might have been conspiring against her.
The sleepless nights. The exhausting nights. The nights where she cried herself to sleep as she tried to keep up the worst of facades.
She forced herself to stop thinking about the past. Breaking down in front of Rarity certainly wouldn't solve any problems. Especially given her appealing proposal. If only Starlight had had such effortless powers of persuasion at her disposal back then...
"All of them." Starlight's words came out on their own, amidst desperate breaths. "Every single one."
Rarity smiled, and her eyes lidded. Her smile and voice shifted to soft, silken demureness.
"Then step into my parlor, Miss Glimmer... and 'all of them' you shall have."
Starlight felt her cheeks flush—completely without her permission.
Rarity clapped her hooves. "Spike, put out the Closed sign. We have a VIP in our midst."
Nearly two hours later, a stack of discarded fabrics lay on the floor, and several piles of dresses lay on several chairs. Rarity held one dress aloft before Starlight with her magic.
Starlight looked at it in awe. She had no idea there would be so many questions involved in a fashion consultation, to say nothing of Rarity possessing so many dresses, or the fact that Starlight had actually managed to pick one out of the seeming never-ending bunch.
"Starlight, dear?" Rarity said, as enthusiastically as the moment they'd first met. "Are you ready?"
Starlight took a deep breath. "Yes."
She closed her eyes, and felt the dress fall atop her. She heard and felt Rarity's magic working, clasping it around her frame, her torso, her legs. It was soft. Snug.
Secure.
"All right, Starlight," Rarity said softly. "You may open your eyes... and marvel at the new you."
Starlight did so, seeing herself clad in a solid black blanket of perfectly pleated fabric. She moved her body, walking around in front of the mirror before her. With each movement, several dark flaps swayed in the air, almost like a cape. It flowed, it complemented her coat, it was flexible, it was so pretty.
It scared her.
Starlight pushed the fear in her chest down, as far down as she could, making sure to concentrate on the clear objective prettiness of the outfit itself. She'd had her heart set on it, after all. She tried to express her reaction in words, but the growing pangs in her heart made it impossible to concentrate.
Fortunately, Rarity spoke for her.
"Hmmm. It's... elegant. As expected. Your coat and mane colors complement it quite nicely." Rarity paced around Starlight's pedestal. "But it's missing something. Something striking. Right now you're practically blending in. Fading away."
"I'd say this looks like a job for some jewels," Spike spoke up. "How about diamonds?"
Rarity gasped, her hoof flying to her smiling face. "Accentuating accessories! Spike, what a marvelous idea!"
Starlight looked at Spike, trying not to show her surprise. She failed.
"Spike's been helping me for a couple of years now," Rarity said. "Really, if some fashion sense didn't rub off on him, I'd be worried." She levitated several gems from a box to the side, placing them on the dress, and further tending to the fabric with her hooves. "All right, just a few tucks here, a few frills there, proper positioning... yes! Yes, yes, yes! Heavens, the diamonds make it! They really do!" Rarity adjusted her thick red glasses, stepped back, and marveled at Starlight on display.
"I call it... A Light In The Darkness'. Truly my latest masterpiece." Rarity's voice softened. "And I don't simply mean the garment, but the pony inside of it as well."
"I..." Starlight looked at the mirror, smiling, her chest warming.
It really did work. The outfit, the look, everything.
It had been so long since she'd felt such joy looking at herself in a mirror.
"I love it, Rarity, I..." She squealed, then preened, then twirled, her heart leaping at the sight. She raised her forehooves in triumph. "I love it so much!" Starlight shouted, cackling freely. "I—"
As she laughed, she caught her expression in the mirror—eyebrows slanted, mouth wide in a toothy grin.
The past came back.
The fear struck again, as loud in her mind as a thunderclap.
She froze.
"I..."
A shivering Starlight Glimmer stepped off of the pedestal, whispering two words.
"I can't."
Rarity and Spike rushed over to Starlight, who was leaning, gasping, and trembling against the wall with one hoof.
"Dear, what's wrong?" Rarity asked. "It looked like we'd hit a breakthrough!"
Spike nodded. "You looked like you were loving it."
Starlight tried to answer rationally. To explain it all away. To get back to the fitting, and walk out a new mare, as Rarity had promised.
But when she opened her mouth, she instead realized that she didn't have the energy to push the fear down any more.
The dam burst.
"I do, Spike. I love this dress so much. But now that we've seen it, don't you think it makes me look somewhat... " Starlight poked her head close to the mirror, and gingerly walked back in front of it. Her voice slipped back down to a whisper. "...villainous?"
"Rarity walked next to her. "Honestly? The word I would have used is debutante. A mare who would put Canterlot to shame, given the honor she radiates with her very presence."
Starlight blushed, then sighed. Her trembles slowly ebbed, but her mind was still a murky haze. It was still impossible to focus, much less figure out her next course of action.
Fortunately, once more, Rarity provided ample distraction, and a smile at no extra charge. "Firstly: black is beautiful. It's basic, it's slimming, it's the blank slate of the color spectrum. You are blessed to have been born with a coat that complements it better than most ponies. If I'm being completely honest, I'm rather jealous. The mime look doesn't quite work for me. You understand."
Starlight barely suppressed a giggle.
"Secondly," Rarity continued. "You chose the fabric and design. We spent two hours here, and there are a literal rainbow of discarded dresses around my boutique, in all colors and shapes. You could have gone with literally anything else. But you didn't."
"I..." Starlight nodded. "I know I didn't. But even then, I wasn't sure if I was making the right choice."
Rarity tilted her head. "The right choice for who?"
A knot formed in Starlight's stomach. She swallowed. "I... for..."
"You spoke from the heart, did you not?" Rarity pressed.
The trembles returned, with double intensity. "I-I did, but..."
"Just like you did when you told me you wanted to still be an influencer, even after running an entire town where you did just that?"
The replacement dam that Starlight's heart had been busy hastily constructing didn't stand a chance.
The tsunami hit.
"What I want doesn't matter!" Starlight exploded, her voice cracking. She threw off the dress. "Not anymore! Don't you think I might not want to let anypony else think I'm going back to to that?"
Rarity didn't answer.
"I spent my entire life being wrong and awful," Starlight sobbed, "and I hate who I was! I hate it so much! I barely like who I am right now! And I don't know what to do about it! But moving forwards instead of backwards... isn't that just logical?"
Starlight gasped for breath. "Isn't it the right thing to to do?" The knot in her chest dissolved, replaced by sticky, viscous guilt in the pit of her stomach. "I-I'm sorry, Rarity, I'm so sorry, I—"
Rarity shook her head.
"Don't be. My questions are never idle, Starlight, nor are they ever inconsequential. From the very first question I posed to you when you walked into my boutique, to my last question from a minute ago, I did whatever I could to get you to confront this exactly." Rarity placed a caressing hoof on Starlight's shoulder.
"But... but why?" Starlight choked.
"Because, thirdly: Carousel Boutique is about bringing out inner beauty. Naturally you have what it takes on the outside. Your coat, your mane, your voice—oh your voice is simply divine," Rarity chanted. But those things only take you so far. When push comes to shove, it is the inside of anypony that will validate what is outside."
"That's what I'm afraid of," Starlight said. "Really, really afraid of."
Rarity sighed, and squeezed Starlight's shoulder. "Starlight. it is absolutely okay to be all right with who you are inside, and what ideas speak to you."
"No it's not," Starlight said in a meek voice. "Rarity, not everything I might like, or everything I am inside, is..."
"Accepted? Appreciated? Safe?"
Starlight nodded.
"Excellent!" Rarity crowed. "Let it be, I say. I've served countless ponies who thought they were the absolute worst Equestria had to offer. Who thought they had no inner glow to be brought to the surface. Every single one of them has been proven wrong." Rarity winked. "And that's why I have the fashion empire."
Rarity gently tugged Starlight's hoof. Starlight followed, and Rarity led her to a nearby window. A light spring rain could be seen falling outside, with the sun still out. Rarity gestured outwards and upwards.
Starlight followed Rarity's gesture, and gaped as she saw a multicolored arc across the horizon, spreading beauty all across the town of Ponyville.
"Nopony is pure sweetness, or pure malice," Rarity said. "Nopony is completely 'normal', or completely off of the beaten path. Nopony is a saint, nor is anypony beyond redemption. Just like the rainbow that shines after every storm, we all occupy a spectrum of personalities, wishes, fantasies, ideals, vices. All have their uses to help others... and yourself."
Rarity took Starlight's hooves. "But the pony who denies who they are, is the pony who denies all they can be—meaning that they will never be at their best. Or their most beautiful."
Starlight turned Rarity's words over in her mind. They... were new. Comfortingly so.
She decided she wanted to believe in them.
A third dam could wait. At least for the moment.
"So what you're trying to tell me is that... it's really all okay?" Starlight whispered. "All of myself is okay?"
Rarity nodded and smiled. "So long as nopony gets hurt, of course." Her eyes twinkled. "But it looks like you're past that phase."
Starlight could feel the weights lifting off of her chest, one by one. She giggled. "I... I wish I had you to tell me this years ago. Instead I forced conformity and sameness on so many ponies. I forced them to push in their inner beauty. And I feel absolutely terrible about it."
Rarity rolled her eyes. "Honestly? You're hardly the first in Equestria to employ the methods you did. But fear not, Starlight. I refuse to pass judgment on the current you based on what I saw or experienced the very first time we ever met. Quite honestly, it sounds like you're pretty good at doing that to yourself.
"But I can give you one piece of advice: love yourself, as you wish for others to love you. Genuinely, and without force. And don't worry, that's never something that comes easily or instantly. It takes hard work and a huge heart to not compare yourself to others, or to forgive yourself for past mistakes."
Rarity kissed Starlight on the cheek. "But all of Eqeustria, including you, me, and Spike here... we are all works in progress, every day of our lives. And even when we pass away, those works are never 'finished' or 'perfect'—merely the best they can be at that point in time."
Starlight sniffled, wiping her eyes. "Thank you, Rarity. I'll... I'll do my best to remember that."
"Wonderful. I'll be back in a few minutes--I need to put away the dresses and supplies we didn't use." Rarity went to the back room, several dresses magically floating behind her.
Starlight watched Rarity disappear behind the back door. She put her hoof to the cheek Rarity had kissed. "She certainly is... passionate... about her work."
"Heh, yeah," Spike replied. "Passion's her middle name. Especially when it comes to favored clients."
Starlight failed to avoid blushing for the third time that hour. "Of which I am one?"
Spike shrugged. "Looks like." He paced around Starlight, claw to his chin, and letting out several "hmm"s. After a minute of this, Starlight couldn't take it anymore.
"Something the matter?" she asked. "Is there something on my face?"
Spike shrugged again. "Nah, nothing like that. I was just thinking: this is the first time we've ever really been... just in once place for any length of time. And just... talking normally."
Starlight picked up Spike's ball, and sighed. "Right. Because..."
"...yeah."
Both fell silent, their gazes apart.
"So yeah," Spike said again after a short while. "I wasn't sure what to think when you got here. Especially given our, uh, 'adventures'."
Starlight nodded. "I understand completely."
Spike walked in front of Starlight, into her field of vision. "But Rarity's right. You don't have to be sorry about everything twenty-four-seven. They already know you are. They've been in that same place. I've been in that same place."
Spike gestured out of the window. "I almost destroyed this whole town once because I was totally fixated on one thing. And unlike you, I wasn't in enough of my right mind to know that what I was doing. To be able to be talked out of it like you were. I give you credit for trusting in Twilight, and in friendship. Celestia knows I've had to.
"So yeah. Where I'm standing? At least, now that you're not trying to unmake the universe?" Spike shrugged. "You seem fine to me. No crazier than any of us, anyway."
Starlight's limbs moved on their own, and in moments, she found herself hugging Spike. "I really appreciate it, Spike. Thank you so much."
"Not a problem," Spike said, hugging back. "Besides, Twilight can tell you the stories a lot better than I could, but you're also not the first girl we've met who was totally nasty one time but then managed to turn herself around and become one of our best friends." Spike pulled back. "And knowing Twilight's luck, you probably won't be the last, either."
"Well," Starlight said, "if that happens in the future, maybe I can turn whoever it might be around. Pay it forward."
Spike grinned. "Heh. You'd be our best bet."
Hoof met claw in a jubilant collision.
Rarity emerged out of the back room. "Did I interrupt something?" she said, looking at the scene before her.
"Not at all, Rarity," Starlight said, beaming and walking over to her. "Thank you both so much. I've... made a decision."
"Splendid!" Rarity said. "By all means, let us hear it."
I've decided..." Starlight took a deep breath. "...that I love the dress. I love that it makes me feel powerful just by putting it on. And I do like the attention. But at the same time... I'll also work on myself. So that I'll be able to use both of those things wisely. If I'm going to wear my heart's desire?"
She looked at Rarity, Spike, and then the sparkling dark ensemble. "Then I want to be worthy of it. In my heart."
Rarity's grin went from ear to ear. She picked up the dress with her magic, and placed it in Starlight's hoof.
"Now that," Rarity said, "is a statement born of true beauty."
