A Roundabout Way to Make a Bargain

by 1stLieutenantCrunch

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Alternate Universe, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance
Length: 5480

The Equestrian wastes are dangerous, unforgiving, and- worst of all- lonely. This is especially true for a caravan worker- so when an opportunity appears, you better go for it!

The Equestrian wastes are dangerous, unforgiving, and- worst of all- lonely. This is especially true for a caravan worker- so when an opportunity appears, you’d better go for it!

FOE shortish story. Nothing dark or gritty, just some plump mare cuddling.

Published 2017-06-06 04:20:05 UTC
Last updated 2017-06-08 01:46:49 UTC

Caps and Curves

"Wick! Could you watch your side of the road for once?! Raiders ain't taking a break just because you are!" I shook my head lightly- I’d been day-dreaming again. Looking over at the caravan guard, I could see that she was getting pretty fed up with me, but what can you expect in a place like this? There was barely anything left to look at, and the scenery hadn't changed for miles! Just the same dirty, grey piles of brick, with rebar and girders poking out every so often, and there was no change in sight. This route was supposed to be one of the safer ones... but honestly? Getting shot at by raiders almost sounded nice right now. Besides, didn't we pay her to protect us- not the other way around? Let her worry about keeping watch!

Ugh. It was a good dream too... and now I could barely remember it. I figured I might as well try looking attentive though- the guard already looked like she was considering the pros and cons of turning on me. Looking forward, I could see the boss facing away from us on top of the wagon. I knew that she knew what was happening, but she didn't look like she intended to get involved. She'd no doubt been doing this much longer than either of us combined, so coworkers wearing on each other probably didn't mean much to her anymore. Heh, now that I think about it, I don't think I've seen her care about a single thing since I started working for her- even that one time when we got ambushed by raiders, she looked about as excited as she did now. Guess years of these routes will do that to ya.

The caravan was decently sized, with three wagons and three of us workers, which would make us a nice target- but then the same number of guards tended to keep opportunists from getting ideas. As much as the guards annoyed me, I felt a lot safer in a caravan with this many. At the very least, I’m sure raiders would go for them first- and hopefully not the peach colored coward running away. That’s assuming I would even have to the courage to manage moving next time- something I failed to do a couple weeks ago. It was a miracle I only got shot in the leg, standing there like an idiot. I had bought a 10mm pistol before joining the caravan, but at this point it felt more like a waste of money. If some ponies felt confident enough to attack us, I don’t think they’d need to worry very much about a mare with a pistol that she couldn’t find the safety for half the time.

I had never really been the aggressive type- I was about average height for a mare, but certainly not built for much of anything, despite being an earth pony. Wearing an old denim coat for the rain, some saddle bags and a small holster for my pistol on my side, there really wasn’t anything about me that stood out. I had a light pink coat, a darker orangeish-red mane that fell over my eyes every once and a while, and a cutie mark of an open can of cobbler- amazing, right? I’d gotten that when I was filly for sharing a can of berry cobbler I was eating, so I guess my talent was sharing food? Honestly, I still didn’t know, but it definitely felt like a let down.

When I had signed on to work for this caravan, I had thought that... I don’t know, maybe I would become tougher from the travel? Up until then, I’d been living with my mother in a shack at a small trading post. I felt like I was wasting away... like I’d become my mother eventually- just living off of small jobs with no real purpose. The only thing I’d gotten so far from this job though was fatigue. But this job had also been the only stable pay I’d ever had. In the end, being able to pay for food kept me on.

I noticed that the boss was looking up at something now- but following her eyes down the road, I couldn’t make anything out. Maybe it was a landmark? She probably knew these routes like the back of her- oh there was something! I could just barely begin to make out the start of some more intact buildings, gradually rising out of the mounds of debris in the distance. The closer we got, the more I could make out of a couple ponies walking about, and some more at what I guessed was the bar. The buildings had the same boring, dusty feel as the landscape, with about six or so having been cleaned up to varying degrees and inhabited. It was a major improvement in scenery from the road we came from, but that wasn't saying much. That's not what I cared about though- what I did care about was it was chance to rest my legs and get something eat! Walking around the wastes for a living is about as tiring as you'd think.

First things first, though- business. We didn’t come all this way to look at some backwater town. Our caravan came to a stop in front of a small, three story building- two really, with the top floor being a shell of what it originally was. The windows on the second floor were boarded for the most part, but the first floor clearly had more effort put into its appearance, with a swept sidewalk and a large bay window, showing the inside filled with shelves of supplies. Hopping down from the wagon, the boss picked up a couple of bags of our lighter stock off the wagon and threw them on her back, motioning for me to do the same, before walking inside. Grabbing the other two, I shoved them on my back and followed after.

A bell above the door tinkled pitifully as we walked in. The interior was fairly nice compared to the usual building interiors of most towns- hardwood covered the floors and somewhat intact beige plaster covered the walls and ceiling. The signage for the building was long gone, but it looked like it had once been a bakery, with the glass displays underneath a long wooden counter in the back and faded designs on the walls. A dozen or so of what looked like super market shelves stood in the center, filled with various supplies and bins of parts.

We made our way towards the counter in the back, maneuvering through the tight spacing between the shelves with our bags. There was a guard in the back corner that I heard before actually seeing him.

“Ms. Blossom! You have customers out here!”, he yelled towards a doorway to the left, behind the counter. Other then that, he didn’t react towards our presence much- going back to being a bored statue and casting suspicious glances occasionally. I could hear a sudden creaking of floor boards and hoof steps coming from the doorway- didn’t sound like they were in a hurry. I could also see the corner of what looked like a large oven- probably was a bakery at some point then.

“Ah, just a moment! I’ll be right out,” I could hear the mare call out from the back. It was a nice voice, not dry and gravelly like the guard, or non-existent like my boss. I wouldn’t say she sounded refined, but there was a smooth and professional quality to it, like you’d hear in an old holotape recording. A steel blue head passed through the doorway, with a horn poking through pinkish-orange hair that was pulled back into a braid with loose strands curling a bit. Light blue eyes looked out at us, passing from me to the boss. She had a kind look about her, with a bit of chubbiness making her face soft- one that made me want to relax a bit. My eyes were drawn to the rest of her as she passed through the doorway- sweet Celestia, I was not expecting that. Her head and neck had hinted at her being a bit heavy, but her barrel was definitely not hinting- as my eyes traveled down her front, her outline took a turn, arcing out around a belly that pressed against her thighs, squishing a bit with each step. As she stepped out further, I could see that her rear was smaller in comparison, but certainly not small. The outline of her back curved up and over her croup, and as I looked, my eyes were drawn along her backside to her thighs, both of which had a good deal of cushioning. Her cutie mark was a small white flower with three blue berries behind, which slowly stretched and squeezed over her flanks as she walked in. Looking from where here thighs and belly pressed together, I stared back at- sweet Celestia I was staring. My eyes shot back up in time for me to see her shifting her gaze to my left, towards the boss. Oh Luna, sh-she didn’t see me staring, did she?! I could feel my face heat up as I looked at the wall behind her.

“Auburn! It’s been a while since the last time you’ve been here- how have you been?”

“Well enough. I’ve got some stock for you to look over- a bit of what you traded for last time if that interests you.”

“Of course. Let’s have a look then.” The boss hefted her bags onto the counter, nudging me to do the same when I didn’t respond right away. They began pulling the contents out onto the counter and sorting them into piles- discussing the various containers of ammunition, cans of food, and potions. Sometimes I really questioned working for a caravan- the travel was boring enough, but the bartering? The encroaching boredom made it all too easy for my eyes to begin to wander, naturally going back to the most interesting place in the room.

She- Blossom?- was leaning over the counter, across from the boss, holding some kind of potion bottle in her hooves. She looked pretty focused on it, so maybe a quick peak wouldn’t hurt... Traveling down her neck to the counter, I could see the top of her belly squishing into the wood, with a small ridge where some of the fat was pressed up and out onto the top. Looking further back, I could see her rump, peaking out just past the counter. Her cutie mark was ever so slightly distorted from stretching around the edges, and slowly swaying back and forth with her tail as she put weight from one hind leg to the other. Now that I looked closer, I could see that her coat was amazingly well kept. It almost looked like velvet, tempting me to reach out and stroke along her glistening back- to feel that soft coat brush against my hoof. Looking a bit lower though, I hit the jackpot.

Down, just below the counter top and through the display window, I could see the rest of her belly pressing flat against the back window. With all the weight she put on it, her belly pressed out against the surface- widening a bit from what I’d spied before. I watched her belly shift a few times as she reached for different items on the counter- occasionally leaning further to reach something closer to the other side and making her belly widen on the glass as she pressed against it more. Looking at her plump body... I don’t know. Something about the curves, or the way she just felt... substantial. It was... it was cute. I- I’m wasn’t sure how she made me feel, but I liked the feeling- I liked her. She was honestly the first pleasant thing to look at in a very long time. Looking back to her face, I saw that she was smirking now, her cheek pulling back a smidgen and raising up into the bottom corner of her eye. Her eyebrow was raised and her blue eyes were looking at m-

...oh no.

She had been watching me ogle her. I... Celestia, I can’t play that off! My eyes shot away from her and over to my boss- at least she’d been busy with something else on the counter. I could feel my face and ears burning, sweat beginning to build on my forehead. Sweet Celestia, what was I supposed to do now?! I couldn’t just stand there like an idiot!

“I-I’m going to go look at the guns over there...I uh... I’ve been meaning to get a new one.” I didn’t need another useless gun! Why couldn’t I have said something less expensive, like ammo? My boss didn’t look up , only grunting in reply. Blossom had that same knowing look as before, only nodding slightly before going back to haggling. I hurried away, towards the far side of the store to a shelf with some pistols on it. I shakily picked up a pistol and eyed turned it over in my hooves- I had no idea what I was looking at. Maybe one of them was loaded? I could put myself out of my misery.

I don’t know how long I fumbled with the pistols back there, but eventually I heard the sound of caps being passed out on the counter top and items being packed away. It took me a while to work up the nerve to walk back to the counter, but when I did, my boss had already packed up and was carrying her two bags out. She passed by without saying a word, and I looked over to the counter. Blossom was standing behind the counter with the same look as earlier, though there was something different about her smile that I couldn’t place. I wasn’t able to keep eye contact, so I just covered the rest of the distance looking at the floor.

“Something catch your eye?” I gave a small nod and managed to place the pistol I’d carried up onto the counter without too much fumbling. I think it was a 9mm one, but I couldn’t say for sure. I probably wouldn’t be able to tell under normal circumstances, much less when I was a nervous wreck. I just picked one out that looked cheap enough to not break my cap bag, but expensive enough to not waste her time and come off as a creep. She picked the pistol up in her hooves and looked it over a bit, putting on an appraising face and humming. After a second or two she put it back down and slid it towards me.

“I think twenty caps is about right, does that sound fair?”

“Oh, sure,” I said as I counted out the caps. That was actually a lot less than I was thinking it would be- maybe buying this pistol wouldn’t completely ruin my finances! As I was putting the last of the caps on the counter, I looked up to see Blossom narrowing her eyes at my side. Following her look, I looked over to see my 10mm pistol, holstered to my barrel.

“It looks like you already have a 10mm... do you have any 9mm ammunition for this?” Nope, not that it mattered- I wouldn’t be using this anyways. But maybe I should buy something else now, since the pistol was so cheap?

“Uh yeah, it’s 10mm- I’ll go back and find some am-”

“Oh don’t worry, I’ve got some over here,” she stopped me as I was turning around, reaching under the counter and pulling out a carton of what looked like a hundred rounds.

“I’ll just include these with the gun- they’re fairly cheap and you won’t be doing much good with an empty chamber,” she smiled as she slid the carton over to me. I didn’t say anything right away, instead choosing to look at the carton for a moment like an idiot. That was generous. I thought she would be creeped out by me, maybe annoyed? Her smile looked genuine enough, though.

“I uh- thank you! Are you sure?” I started hefting the other two bags still on the counter onto my back, placing the pistol and carton in my saddle bag- ready to get out as soon as possible.

“Mhmm- can’t have you wandering around unprotected, now can we?” With the bags on my back, I gave an awkward nod and laugh, and started making my way towards the door. That’d gone a lot better than I’d thought it would!

“-actually, I think you do owe me a bit more, “ Blossom stopped me about half way to the door. I froze and turned my head towards her. Nooo... I just wanted to walk out the door and be done with all of this- why did she have to drag it out?!

“How much?”

“A name would be nice, ” Oh- that wasn’t so bad.

“My name’s Wick Light- just Wick is fine though.”

“Wick? My name’s Blueberry Blossom- feel free to call me Blue.” That sounded... nice. I kinda liked it. I... why was she acting so nice to me? Maybe she didn’t realize I was admiring her before?

“It was nice to meet you, Wick! Alright, I won’t hold any longer- I hope to see you around here again!” She was still smiling at me- it was warm and genuine, and it almost made me want to stop and look at her a while longer. Almost. With a final wave goodbye, she turned and began making her way back towards the back door, and I made my way out the front.

Author's Note

No proofreader atm, so while I hope I got everything, I probably didn’t.
First thing I’ve written in years too, so I hope you didn’t get your hopes up too high.

Customer Service with a Supple Touch

I pushed the chunks in the stew around with my spoon. I wasn’t nearly as hungry as I had been when we first came to town. It’d only been a few minutes since I’d left the store, and the rest of the caravan had been quick to set-up in the common area of the town while the boss and I were gone- even whipping up a stew of... something. It looked like they’d just thrown whatever they could find lying around into a pot of water. I sighed and pushed my bowl across the picnic table- I wasn’t missing much, and I had too much on my mind.

...Was she not angry at me? I never actually did see her get mad, but that was just going by her face. Part of selling stuff is selling yourself to the buyer, so maybe she was just forcing a smile. That didn’t explain the bullets though, and now that I’d thought about it, that gun really was cheaper than it should’ve been. It may not have been anything special, but a knife would’ve been closer to the value that she sold it for. That... that had to be genuinely nice thing- unless she was conning me? I didn’t check the gun over to see that it was really working, so maybe it was just a dud? The box could also have been low quality bullets that would just jam the gun. ...that sounds like paranoia at best. I had grabbed that gun myself- if it was a dud, that’d be completely by chance! And the bullets- I hadn’t even looked at those yet. I reached down to my saddle bags on the ground next to me and pulled the carton out. Popping the lid open, I spilled a couple onto the table. They looked perfectly fine. The brass even gleamed in the midday sun- certainly looked like they wouldn’t jam.

This was stupid. I was just making up reasons to prove she hated me. She’d given me every outward sign that she didn’t- she even asked for my name! That didn’t strike me as malicious. She’d... she’d been so kind to me, whether or not that smile had been fake when she caught me... but what if it really wasn’t fake? Did she like it when I was looking at her? I mean, I guess that could be flattering... did that mean she was interested in me too, then?

I kept imagining that smile again and again in my head- just thinking about it made me both relaxed and jittery at the same time. It was so warm and kind... I could even pretend it was loving. Since I’d been in this caravan- no, since as long as I could remember, I couldn’t remember anyone looking at me like that. It felt like everything and everyone didn’t care about anything really- especially not me. Even if I was just imagining that she felt that way... I wanted to see her face again... I wanted to be nestled against her, feeling her coat against mine as her body pressed into me, and looking into that loving smile. I wanted that to happen so bad, but... could it?

I needed to go back. Who knows when I’d be back in this town again? If I did have a chance with her, I didn’t want to waste it fantasizing! I’d already started walking back to the store by now without really realizing. I was really doing this! I could feel my heart pounding by the time I got to the door. Without thinking, I grabbed the handle with my hoof and pushed it open.

As the door flew open, I heard the bell jangle harder than the last time. Blue was behind the counter with what looked like a pre-war magazine, sitting on a stool that she’d moved in. Hearing my (a tad too forceful) entry, she looked up and over to me- and all my thoughts and confidence came crashing down. What do I do now?! Why didn’t I think of something before I came in?! I stood there at the door for a second or two, looking wide-eyed at Blue across the room. She had a slightly surprised look on her face, staring back at me.

“Hello again- I didn’t expect you back so soon!” She recovered first, setting the magazine to the side and looking at me expectantly. I knew I should say something back, but I was still frozen in the doorway. How do I open? I can’t just say, “Hey there, I think you’re pretty cute”! I can’t just stand here either- that’s no better! Eventually I let out a weak, “Hey,” and started shuffling forward. It wouldn’t look weird if I waited to get over there to talk, right? I started racing through ideas in my head, all of them worse than the last.

“Was there something wrong with the gun?” Maybe I could ask her something about the gun? What though? I’ll look stupid if I ask her how to use it. I still couldn’t think of anything, and I was nearly at the counter. Her eyebrows were starting to scrunch together now, and she was tilting her head a bit. I hadn’t noticed before, but I was starting to shake again- I must look like a wreck.

“I- uh... I...” Come on! Say something!

“-I thought I’d left something on the counter.” Yes, I did. My brain. Sweet Celestia this was stupid.

“Oh, I didn’t see anything- what was it?” She leaned forward a bit, her stomach bulging out to the sides slightly as it was forced against her thighs. The way she sat on the stool, with her hind legs dangling off the front, played with her weight in wonderful way- her rump curved out from where it was compressed between her weight and the seat, and her belly sat in her lap, flowing over her legs and bowing out in front of her, as well as making small love handles on her sides. She looked beautiful, sitting there. When I looked back up, her eyes had widened while I was looking at here curves. Then her eyebrows started moving up from where they were scrunched together, and she lowered her eye lids a bit. She was giving me that smile again, just like-

“Oh- it-it’s nothing, never mind!” I turned around and started moving quickly back towards the door. What am doing?! I wanted this! -she was smiling again! She wanted it! I was getting dizzy and my face felt numb. I needed to get out- I was making an idiot of myself! I nearly ran into the door and awkwardly tried to grab the handle. I could feel tears starting to build in my eyes, and I wanted nothing more than to just run out and keep running. How could I mess up this bad?! I-

“Wick!” I stopped, the door still push open and my head already out. I almost left anyways- I didn’t want to stay here and keep screwing up in front of her. I turned my head to look back at her, doing my best to make sure I didn’t start crying. She looked a little concerned, maybe even pitying, but her lips still curved up a bit when she saw me turn back around.

“-I’ve been thinking, since you left earlier. That holster you’re using right now, it probably won’t fit the pistol you just bought. I have another one though, that I’d like you to try on,” she said as she started shifting herself around get off the stool. Her belly bounced a bit as she landed, and she started walking to the left side of the store- looking over to me and beckoning to follow. I stood there, still half out the door, while she walked around the edge of the counter and behind a taller shelf, out of sight. I took a few deep breathes, let go of the door, and started walking over to meet her.

It felt like it’d been an eternity by the time I’d rounded the end of the shelf. I was still shaking slightly, but I wasn’t crying. I didn’t know how to feel right now- embarrassed? Hopeful? Definitely stupid. Blue was standing a few steps away, looking through a bin of harnesses. She looked over when she heard me step around the corner, and motioned with her hoof to come closer. Looking into the container, she pulled out a harness with her magic that was slightly smaller than mine, but with similar black straps that would wrap around my barrel. She turned to me and move the harness over towards me.

“I think this one should work, but I’d like to make sure it fits. Could you sit down for a moment?” She patted the ground next to her, and I slowly moved closer and sat. Placing the holster on my side, she held it there with a hoof while taking one of the straps in another hoof and placing it across my back.

“These things can be such a pain sometimes- hope you don’t mind.” She then reached down for the other one, her foreleg brushing against me, causing me to tense a bit and blush. She was a unicorn, why wasn’t she using h- She began leaning into me, her foreleg traveling under me to my other side and her belly beginning to rub against my side and legs. If I wasn’t tense before, I definitely was now- I was practically a statue, my breath becoming shallow as her fur brushed against me. After moving the strap to my side, she moved her other hoof from holding the holster- letting her belly hold it in placed instead- picked up the strap on my back and fully rested herself on me.

She was heavy. I was taken by surprise and nearly toppled over, just barely catching myself and spreading my forelegs to support the weight. I could hardly breath now, but not because of the weight. She was sitting now, her hind legs going to either side on me, with the girth of her legs squeezing me in the middle. Her belly, gently rubbing before, was now fully supported by me- spilling out to the sides as my barrel sank into her plump body. Her neck rested against the back of mine, and I could both hear her gentle breathing and feel her belly slowly expand and contract with each breath.

I wasn’t able to think at this point- I couldn’t believe what was happening. This- this was way beyond a smile or some free bullets. There was no way that she didn’t realize what she was doing right now- the way she was nearly making my heart beat out of my chest, or how my face must’ve been bright red. She... she really did-

I heard the ends of the straps clatter to the floor, and then her felt her hooves finish wrapping around me. In one motion, she shifted me around to face her and pulled me back towards her, so that I was now resting against her belly and looking up at her. She was mirthful, grinning down at me as she held me against her.

“You know that I could see you taking a peek at me- right? You were so cute when I caught you,” she leaned in slightly, saying the last part in a quieter voice. Definitely not questioning it now. I couldn’t bring myself to look up at her, instead looking down to avoid eye contact- only to have my muzzle bury into her pudge. She giggled at my reaction, making me bounce up and down lightly with her belly. Making a sound that was something between the last of her tittering and cooing, she craned her head down and nuzzled the crook of my neck, gently rubbing her velvet fur into me. I closed my eyes, like it’d make me disappear and stop the embarrassment I was feeling. If I thought I was going to faint earlier, I was definitely going to die now. But with the feeling of her corpulent body cradling me, the way her breath tickled my neck as she gently cooed into me and rubbed my neck, how she enveloped me and made me feel safe- I think I’d be fine, dying like this.

“You poor thing- you know, I was afraid you wouldn’t come back. You nearly ran out before I could get your name!” She said after I’d calmed a bit, moving away from my neck to keep talking to me, occasionally tracing one of her hooves along my back. She moved her muzzle to my head, nudging the top.

“Wick? Could you look at me?” She pulled her muzzle back, waiting patiently. I pulled my snout out from where it’d been nestled in her chest and turned my head to look up- directly in to a pecking kiss on the forehead. I flinched and lowered my head into her chest, still looking up at her.

“I’d love to stay here with you, but I’ve got some things left to do today. Do you know how long you’ll be in town?” It took me a moment to find my voice again.

“We- the caravan’s leaving tomorrow morning,” I eventually mumbled out. She beamed down at me and squeezed me tight.

“Oh good! Do you think you’ll be able to come back tonight? I’ll make plenty of food, so you won’t have to worry about dinner,” Blue chirped, bouncing me a bit in her excitement.

“Ok.” Ok?! Yes! Yesyesyes!

“Great! I’ll see you tonight.” Blue gave me one last squeeze, and I wiggled my hooves out from where they stuck under me to give a weak hug back. She hefted herself back up, letting me slide off her gut, and began walking back to the counter. She took a couple steps, then stopped for a moment and turned back to me.

“And Wick, you can keep that harness too- as a gift from me to you,” she finished with a wink, turning back and continuing her slow walk. I watched as her tail swished back and forth over her doughy plot that swayed with each step, with her belly showing on each side as it slowly swayed as well- until she rounded the shelf and went out of sight.

My rump thumped against the floor as I sat down and tried go over what had just happened. I looked over at the harness laying next to me, still undone. Picking it up, I held it against my chest, closed my eyes, and grinned like an idiot.

Author's Note

Wow, hugging- that sure was lewd. What’s next- kissing?!
Spoilers: yes