Bluntness and Down-to-Earth(ness)

by Poppy8

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, Alternate Universe, Gore, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Romance
Length: 3864

Saphy and Babe have been have been having trouble communicating with the pet's lately.

Babe and Saphy. Have you ever had to deal with a blunt person? And have you ever meat anyone who's always down to earth? Well two pet's fit this description pretty well. And the two in question havnt been able to not cause trouble lately. So in a desperate attempt to shut their yaps their fellow pets devise a plan. Will their plan work? Will Babe and Saphy stop (inadvertently) casing trouble? And will it or will it not blow up in their faces?

Published 2017-06-05 21:00:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-06-11 14:38:51 UTC

Too harsh?

Cream Cake came into Timidthy's (or Poppy's since the prince was away) room. He was wearing a gold collar with fine stones on it. The other pet's immediately noticed the new accessory.

"Not bad." Crackers said after giving a broad whistle,

"It's preety." Mrs. Oinkers said with an enthusiastic smile on her face.

"You look even cuter then you normally do!" Poppy said she then walked over and hugged her cream puff. After a moment every one looked over to Babe and Saphy.

"Well?" Crackers said,

"Arnt you guy's going to tell Cream Cake what you think?" Mrs. Oinkers said as she motioned over to the chinchilla. Babe opened his mouth but them closed it as if he was trying to find the right word's. As for Saphy she answered immediately.

"The color is lesss of a gold and lookss asss if ssssomepony painted it pisss yellow." Everyone of the pet's eye's widened and Cream Cake's face turned red as his eye's flickered over to Babe. He chuckled nervously,

"Well......I wouldn't say it like Saphy.....but the collar it's just.....look it clashes with your coat. And ruins your perfectly groomed fluff. Plus it's another on of those "fashion, everyfurry who's anyfurry is gonna wear" thing. And your much better then that. So I'm sorry but that coller I don't like." Babe said a bit hesitate but deciding on what his gut was telling him; not his heart.

By then all the pet's we're now looking at Cream Cake who had tears welling up in his eye's.

"Creamy......you okay?" Poppy asked taking a step back from her beloved, and just like that his face started to turn red. And before he could stop himself:

"No I'm not okay! I had to get fifty bits to pay this by doing other pet's chores! And some of them we're demeaning and down right unspeakable! I stayed up for one hundred and sixty-eight hour's to buy it! I value honesty but......I can't believe you two would say these thing's! In fact Babe probably knew the coller was out and instead of walking up to me and asking me what I was trying to do he didn't! And everyfurry knows Saphy has a good sense at fashion. So instead of doing what Babe could've done but telling me what she thought of the coller beforepaw. I wasted my time, energy, and money!" Cream Cake then threw the collar down and ran out the room with tears in his eye's.

"Baby cakes. Come back!" Poppy said as she went flying after Cream Came, after some very uncomfortable silence. Mrs. Oinkers death glared at Babe and Saphy. And followed after the couple with Crackers following. Knowing his lover wouldn't want him to stay.

"Teach me in your ways." Crackers whispered and followed Mrs. Oinkers out the door,

"Do you think I wasss too harsh. I mean we are all friendssss but now their mad at me." Saphy said her eye's starting to water.

"Well......what you said was a bit excessive but it was the truth in your own way. Maybe......it was me? I was just doing what my gut was telling me. I didn't want Cream Cake to stoop to the lowest way of gaining friends or reaching popularity." Babe said as he started scratching at the floor,

"I jussst don't underssstand they wanted honesssty they got honesssty." Saphy said as she used her tail to wipe teas from her eyes. Babe shrugged,

"Somethings pet's can't take honesty." He said simply not knowing what else to say. The two then sighed and ran off to find Cream Cake and give a proper apology.

It was night and Babe was on his pet bed trying to get his sleep but his conscience was making sure he'd get none. 'How could you apologize for giving your opinion. This isn't like what Starlight did making ponies think and act the same. Your, your own sheep you can tell what on your mind. After all Cream Cake, himself, learned that lesson!'

Babe groaned as he felt his face turn red at the memory. It's not that he didn't like to apologize it's that it was humiliating. Crackers definitely wouldn't let him live this down. 'But it hurt his feelings.' Babe argued back trying not to let his conscience win this debate, 'He got his own feelings hurt when asking! Everyfurry knows you are not into popularity contests and that collar was screaming that!' He then sighed and closed his eye's trying to block out his mind that wouldn't shut up.

Meanwhile Saphy was in her terrarium as the heat rock was slowly putting her to sleep. But still her conscience had a few choice words to say. 'I still can't believe you apologized! That collar was hideous! And Babe agreed. How could you?' Saphy sighed, 'Because I didn't mean to make Cream Cake cry. He worked really hard for it and I sssmacked talked him and his pissss coloured coller right acrossss the face!' Her conscience then replied back but she chose to ignore it, but both pets we're wondering why was it so wrong to be right?

The next day the pet's we're again rejoined in Timidthy's room at the castle. All except for Cream Cake.

"I still don't see why you guy's said those thing's." Poppy said who was trying to get a satisfying answer out of Babe and Saphy who we're quickly growing annoyed.

"Of course it's not like we told you we murdered some one or anything. No we said in summary we didn't like the coller. SSSo of courssse you guy'sss are in the right it'ssss not like it feelsss like I'm chewing glassss when you don't underssstand why I have thissss persssonality." Saphy said as she got in Poppy's face casing her to back up from fear and guilt. She than regained her composure and started growling, Babe then got between the girl's.

"Hold it. You can't blame us we we're honest straight from the heart. And....she means she's sorry and so am I....we didn't mean to cause any trouble and if it helps we'll pay Cream Cake back the bits if he can't get the money back." Babe said and Poppy took a deep breath and looked over to Saphy,

"Yesss that'ssss what I meant and I'd be more than happy to sssplit the bitsss with Babe." She said through clenched teeth as all she wanted to do was bite Poppy. And Poppy then took a deep breath and left the room but as she left the two could hear her mutter.

"Stupid overgrown belt hurting my cream puff and why is that sheep so determined to defend her?"

"I'm glad you two came to your senses." Mrs. Oinkers said with a proud smile,

"Oh yeah I enjoy being bossssed around by a rodent and the cousssin of the retarded fluffle puff." Saphy said sarcasm clear in her voice,

"Wow you really are cold-blooded." Crackers said as he soon after started laughing at his own terrible pun. Saphy started hissing, Crackers and Mrs. Oinkers then quickly left the room knowing the snake was ready to strike.

"Hey, hey, hey calm down." Babe said and Saphy calmed slightly, "We're both on thin ice we need to not slip up okay?" And Saphy nodded but in truth she really wanted to say:

"Those morons need to grow some tougher skin!" But she didn't because she knew Babe was right.

Why You Should Never Force Love

Saphy hissed angrily as she slithered across the room still irritated with her friends attitudes. 'I can't believe them! I've never felt more insssulted!' Saphy thought but she was cut short when she heard a loose floor board fly open. She turned towards the uninvited visitor,

"YOU HAVE FIVE SSSECONDS TO LEAVE OR I'LL SSSINK MY FFANGSSS INTO YOU!!" She shouted. Her furry disappeared and shame took its placeas Babe was staring back at her with shocked eye's.

"SSSorry."Saphy said as she recoiled back avoiding any eye contact with the sheep, finally Babe blinked and walked over toSaphy.

"Well I can see your still mad but I highly suggest you don't take your poisoned wrath out on any of our friend's." Babe said,Saphy sighed as red blush spread on her cheeks.

"I won't but no one underssstandsss me." She said,

"That's no true. I do, and I might not approve with some of the remarks you make, but I know it's something that can't be helped." Babe said andSaphysmiled. Saphy wrapped herself onto Babe in a loose hug, causing the sheep to grow a sheepish smile.

"Thanksss."Saphy said softly as she undid her hug,

"Your welcome now come on I think we both need some fresh air." He said as him and Saphy headed out the door. Unfortunately they hadn't noticed a smirking Crackers who now had the biggest idea of a life time.

"Really?" Poppy said,

"Yep! Babe blushed after Saphy hugged him. I think he was just being shy because he's never been hugged before. But maybe we could get them to become a couple." Crackers sqwaked while Mrs. Oinkers rubbed the little hairs on her chinny-chin-chin.

"Makes since to me. They'll be so wrapped up in each other they'll stop annoying us." Cream Cake said,

"Okay it's settled then! We'll make sure those two fall in love and we'll get a little bit of peace in return!" Mrs. Oinkers said finally convinced and all of them cheered. After all what could possibly go wrong? Saphy and Babe we're now in the underground tunnels they had made to be specific they we're in a town under Canterlot. That was called Collerlot, when word of their tunnels got out pet's all over Eqestria made towns under their owner's town's. At first they we're made to reststops but now pet's who's owner's we're busy or abandoned pet's lived there. Their was houses, market places, inns and lot's more.

"Thisss placesss isss certainly busssy." Saphy said as she watched pet's of all species move about,

"This is nothing you should see the midnight rush." Babe said. Saphy smiled meanwhile in the crowd the rest of the pet's we're ready to put their plan into action. As Babe and Saphy made their way to one of Collerlot's cafe's. There we're tables outside of the establishment. And the two wasted no time to sit on one of the table's as the other animals we're doing. A fox waiter came over and took their orders and left as quickly as it came.

"How are you feeling?" Babe said and Saphy smiled again,

"Better. I guessss I jussst needed to clear my head." She said.

"Well good for that or else I might've gotten the vet to defang you." Babe said jokingly,

"Oh really? I didn't think you had the moxy to do ssssomething like that." Saphy replied back causing her and Babe to laugh. Finally their deserts came over, Saphy had an ice cream sundae with extra rat. While Babe had candy hay and grass. Babe took a mouthful and started chewing it. Saphy ate all the rats in one bite and started eating the ice cream that went with it. While the two we're feasting Crackers flew under the table.

Unfortunately Crackers's timing was just a little off. He flew up casing Babe's part of the table to rise just as he swallowed his mouthful of candy grass and hay. Babe ended up crashing into Saphy as their food flew up into the air with the snakes quick thinking. Babe's desert landed on Saphy's head almost appearing to be a wig while Saphy's sunday landed on Babe's butt. The sheep in question felt the frigid ice cream and screamed out,

"C-C-Cold!" As he was now on top of Saphy who was trying to figure out what had happened. Cream Cake, Mrs. Oinkers, and Poppy smacked their foreheads. And Crackers smacked his own for getting himself over excited, all the pet's we're now laughing. Babe's face was red as he tried to shut the world out. While Saphy felt anger bubble inside of her until she said:

"All of you ssstop your gigglesss or elssse I'll make sssure you'll all be ssskined alive!" Everyone paled ans went silent, including their friend's, "Come on let's go." Saphy said quietly as she slithered from under the paralyzed sheep and shook the food off her head. Babe got up and quickly followed after her as everyfurry stared still in shock. Saphy and Babe we're in Crepe and Binkey's room still slightly humiliated. Babe was still shaking as he ran out the door not even daring to look back. Saphy on the other had was hissing clearly irritated. She took a deep breath and sighed as she slithered to her terrarium and turned the heat rock on. Saphy closed her eye's as she felt blushed redden across her face as she thought: 'Why do all the bad thing's happen to me and Babe?'

Meanwhile Mrs. Oinkers, Cream Cake, and Poppy had just got back from Collerlot. And as you could guess all of them we're in bad moods.

"Thanks alot Crackers you did nothing useful as usual!" Poppy said,

"Don't go blaming this on me! You guy's know I need a perfectly drawn out plan before jumping the shark!" Crackers said.

"Well I am blaming this on you! You should've waited!" The piping made pomeranian argued,

"How was I-" Crackers said before Cream Cake and Mrs. Oinkers cut them off.

"Stop!" They both shouted,

"Going at each others throats isn't going to fix this. We'll meet back her I'm two day's with our own solution idea's. Got it?" Mrs. Oinkers said and everyone nodded as they all split up running (or flying) back to their homes.

The Breaking Point

Crackers, Mrs. Oinkers, Cream Cake and Poppy we're all at Bumper's room ready to get their solution ideas out. Crackers banged a gavel on Bumper's dresser,

"Alright this meeting has now come into order." He said. "So does anyone have any idea's?" Cream Cake cleared his throat,

"We tell them the truth, apologize, and help rebuild their reputation and self-esteem." He said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Creamy you do realize one of our friends is a deadly python with a thirst for blood?" Poppy said, Cream Cake paled. "I think we should still try to get them to fall in love while trying to fix what we caused before." Crackers rolled his eye's,

"Nah we should just get them to fall in love. They won't care about the incident when they're in the honeymoon phase." He said. Mrs. Oinkers shook her head,

"Guy's I think we should try to forget trying to get them to fall in love and be there for them in their time of need. Ya know what friend's do." She said making everyone go silent finally Crackers spoke:

"Everyone who's in for my cute little piggies plan say 'I'."

"I." Everyone said almost immediately,

"Alright motion carried." Crackers said as he banged the gavel back down.

"So who should we try to help first?" Cream Cake asked,

"Well we should try to get the most painful one out-of-the-way so I choose Saphy." Poppy said and everyone nodded knowing that it was true Saphy was gonna be in the worst mood. The pet's went through the tunnels and on no time at all they we're staring at Saphy as she hissed angrily on Binkey's bed. They stepped cautiously towards the snake,

"Saphy........are you okay?" Mrs. Oinkers asked fearfully. Saphy turned around with her face as red as a rose and years streaming down her face.

"Yeah sssure I'm fine, it'sss not like I was humiliated. And ,again, failed to keep my mouth sssshut. And probably sssscared an entire city of pet'sss for life or anything. Thankssss for asking I'm just peachy." She said before she turned away from the others, everyone was stunned.

"Sa-Saphy i-it's okay you can talk to us." Cream Cake said,

"I'm fine! I just rather be alone far away from Babe." She said.

"Come on let's try with Babe." Crackers whispered and everyone left Saphy to wollow in her sadness. They made it to Babe but they saw his was pacing as tears feel from his eye's. Poppy opened her mouth but before she could speak Babe interpreted.

"It's all her fault! She just has to be so blunt! I should've never defended her! But of course I always have to be so understanding! I'm almost as bad as Timidthy! At least I wasn't dumb enough to befriend a dictator and a psychopathic murderer! I tried to be nice but I ended up getting laughed at for it! Well mark my word's I'm never going to speak to that idiot ever again!" He ranted, the pet's eye's we're wide in shock.

"Come on Babe I'm sure you don't mean-" Poppy said before an all too familiar voice spoke up,

"My fault!? How was all of thissss my fault?!" Saphy then popped out of a loose floor board and stared at Babe with hatred.

"Guy's wait I'm sure we can-" Mrs. Oinkers said but unfortunately for her Babe replied,

"Because you couldn't keep you fanged mouth shut! Why can't you think before you speak?" By then Saphy had started barring her fangs.

"Well maybe it's because telling someone they look like a clown in make-up. Instead of saying they look bad will make the message sink in better!" She replied back, getting in Babe's face.

"That's ridiculous! You just have no self-control. Y-You......handbag!" Babe said and Saphy along with the other pet's gasped,

"That's it!" She screamed as she tackled Babe to the ground and started wrapping around him and cutting off his air.

"G-Get off!" He managed to squeak out,

"Never!" Saphy said as she stared into Babe's eye's. And her eye's began to ripple through three different colors. Successfully hypnotizing the sheep.

"No stop!" Cream Cake said before Saphy bit Babe on the neck. The hypnotism wore off and the sheep in question screamed in pain and bit Saphy on her tail. She screamed and unravelled from Babe. Saphy grabbed Babe by his tail and started knocking him against the floor. Finally she let go and he went flying into the wall, Babe got back up and tried to focus his now swimming vision.

He charged towards Saphy and she whipped him on the nose with the end of her tail. Babe jumped and landed on Saphy's head and started jumping up and down on it. The pet's watched in horror as the python opened her mouth and swallowed Babe whole. The sheep kicked and squirmed causing Saphy's face to become a mixture of nausea and pain. Finally she threw up Babe with his wool drenched in acid and vomit.

He tried to shake the substance off but Saphy bit Babe again on his lower waist. He screamed and bucked Saphy off, she crashed into dresser head first. As her teeth made a long line on Babe ending at his tail as blood began to stain his wool. He took a couple deep breaths before he passed out. It was then their friend's had realized Babe had been poisoned.

"No! No! Babe come on get up!" Crackers said as he started tugging at Babe's wool. Finally they all looked over to Saphy and saw that her head was bleeding. Her skull had been cracked open like a coconut. And it was all their fault. Crackers flew over to Saphy and started crying,

"No, please no....." He said his voice cracking. And the rest of them started crying for the lose of their friend's. And that was all the sound that was heard in the room.

Looks Can Be Deceiving

The pet's we're still crying over their friend's,

"W-We should've never b-been so insensitive to them." Cream Cake said.

"We shouldn't have tried to force a relationship onto them." Mrs. Oinkers said. Poppy looked at Babe and Saphy,

"W-We never even got to tell them we caused their humiliation." She said as tears poured from her eye's. Crackers was too distressed to even speak as Mrs. Oinkers walked over and pat him on the back.

"Alright now I'm ssssatissssfied." A voice rang and everyone looked over to see Saphy rubbing her head with a rag. Once she was done she threw the rag away and it was revealed no blood was on her head.

"Huh!?" The pet's all said at the same time,

"Alright Babe get up before we give them a heart attack." Saphy said in the middle of a chuckle. Babe got up and turned around with a sly smile,

"Okay I'm so confused how are you two still breathing!?" Crackers said.

"Well......it all started a day after the incident." Babe said,

We met up in the underground city Clawwood at the famous blossom tree root.

"I still don't understand how it happened." Babe said as tears streamed down his face with it being red,

"Me neither. It'sss impossssible!" Saphy said looking distressed. Babe sighed as she tried to wipe tears from his eye's but they kept going.

"I mean it'ssss asss if sssomething pushed your side of the table up." Saphy said and Babe's eye's widened,

"Or......someone." He said and Saphy's eye's widened as well they had figured out who the culprits we're.

"After that it was just a hop, skip, and a jump till we figured out why." Babe said as he finished his story, everyone was shocked as Saphy slithered over to Babe with a smug grin.

"Bu-But how is Babe alive everyone knows that Saphy's bite is deadly!" Cream Cake said,

"Easssy I lined my fangsss with anti-venom and I gave Babe a ssshot of it for when I bit him again." She said.

"And we staged it, I gave Saphy here a tube of fake blood and while you we're focusing on me she put it on." Babe said,

"But why!?" Mrs. Oinkers said.

"To teach you a lesssson on how to treat other'ssss, not everyone is like you. Alssso to teach you not to medal in pet'ssss perssssonal livessss." Saphy said.

"I didn't want you guy's to think that we we're dead. But Saphy thought that faking our deaths. Instead of faking serious injuries would make you all get the message better." Babe said with a cocky smile, everyone blinked.

"Fine we get it now if you don't mind I'm going to take a four-hour nap." Crackers said before flying out the window. Everyone else then said their goodbyes and left.

"Should we have told them what the blossom tree root is famous for?" Babe asked Saphy one he was sure the others we're gone. She then giggled wrapped around Babe and gave him a passionate kiss.

"Naw, let them think they failed." Saphy said as she looked at her lovely sheep with his face flushes red,

"Alright then." Babe said.

"Now come on let's fix those cuts of yours." Saphy said as she unravelled from Babe and they went to get the first aid kit.