The Amazing Arcane Alicorn Frappe

by Vic Fontaine

Rating: everyone
Tags: Equestria Girls, Pinkie Pie (EqG), Comedy, Random, Pinkie Pie, Sunset Shimmer, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 2376

EQG Pinkie Pie unlocks the secret of the Unicorn Frappaccino's power, and sends the recipe to her Equestrian counterpart. What could possibly go wrong?

Unicorn Frappaccinos are taking the world by storm, thanks to its secret ingredient – “unicorn magic”.

Pinkie Pie is sure her Equestrian self could easily reproduce the drink, given the recipe, and sell a lot of them in the process. After all, who better to buy a magical drink than magical creatures?

A late entry to the frappaccino bandwagon. Written just for fun.

Published 2017-06-09 12:30:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-06-09 12:30:06 UTC

Powdered Magic

Author's Note

Really late to the bandwagon on this one, thanks to real life stuff, but I have too many fics languishing in my drafts folder already.

This isn’t any fancy or high-minded story, but I hope you enjoy it anyway, and got at least a few laughs along the way. :pinkiesmile: Thanks for reading!

Powdered Magic

“Are you sure this is going to be the last stop?”

“Absotutely-lutely!”

Sunset slowly rolled her bike over a final set of speed bumps, then weaved around a gaggle of cars that had somehow managed to clog up three spaces and a drive-thru lane. She glanced in her side mirror out of habit, though the feeling of arms around her waist, not to mention the smell of cotton candy in her nose, were more than enough confirmation that her passenger was still safely aboard.

After waiting for a small truck to move out of the way, Sunset pulled into one of the spots marked specifically for motorbikes and quickly secured the engine and kickstand. She slipped her helmet off and shook out her hair before turning back to her friend.

“That’s what you said the last time, Pinkie.”

Pinkie removed her own helmet and watched her hair literally spring back into its usual poofy arrangement. “No, last time I said ‘Yeppers!’. This time I said ‘Absotutely-lutely’, and that’s definitely not the same thing.”

“Wha—” Sunset’s mouth closed without another word. She shook her head a bit to refocus. “Yes, of course, Pinkie. My point though, is that this is the fourth location we’ve been to, and the one past downtown is too far away to get to before I need to be at work. If this one doesn’t have what you need, we’ll need to wait until tomorrow, okay?”

Pinkie just smiled back. “Not to worry, Sunny! This location has the last ingredient for sure!”

“Let me guess,” Sunset replied, “Pinkie sense?”

“Right leg twitch, followed by a pinch in the knee and a delayed tingle in the boobs, of course!” Pinkie thrust out her leg and then her chest for emphasis, with Sunset doing her best not to be seen in public staring at her friend’s admittedly prodigious bosom.

“Okay, okay. I believe you,” Sunset replied. “Let’s… just head inside, alright?”

“Sure thing!” Pinkie skipped on ahead and held the door open ahead of Sunset. “After you, miss Shimmer!”

“Thanks, Pinkie.” She kept walking, but turned back at the last moment. “Wait a sec; you said something about ‘tingly boobs’ at the last store.”

Pinkie winked as she nudged Sunset ahead. “Nah, that was just my bra getting twisted then. This one’s for real though.”

The two girls entered the coffee shop and made their way toward the counter. Sunset glanced at her watch as they took their place in line. She had three hours until her shift at the Canterlot 14 Cinema. Plenty of time, if we don’t catch any traffic on the way back. Thankfully, the baristas here seemed as speedy as the other location, and their turn came up quickly.

“Welcome to Stardust Coffee! What can I get for you two ladies?”

Sunset was about to answer the young man when Pinkie nearly elbowed her out of the way.

“Who are you, mister?”

The barista flinched awkwardly. “M-me?”

“No, the other grey-skinned, two-toned hair guy in here!”

“Huh? Someone call me?”

All eyes turned to the far corner of the cafe, and the lanky businessman who happened to fit that description.

“Butt out of this, suity mcsuitpants!” Pinkie snapped. “This is super duper important official Pinkie business here.”

“P-Pinkie, uh, what? What are you—”

“Don’t ask, sir. Really.” Sunset replied with as apologetic a look as she could muster. “It’s not a big deal.”

“Not a big deal? Are you kidding me, Sunny?” Pinkie rounded on Sunset. “This is a big deal, remember? Huge even! Entire worlds may be at stake here!”

“Wait, as in actual multiple worlds?” The barista’s hand clamped over his mouth a second too late.

“No! I mean yes, er, no! Not at all!” Sunset stammered. “No multiple worlds here that need to be saved! Or any worlds, for that matter. Look, the thing is—”

“So, my drink’s not ready then?”

“No!” Sunset yelled at the top of her lungs. The older man fell back into his chair as if he had been physically pushed.

“Geez, Sunny. No need to get all riled up at the guy,” Pinkie replied cooly. Sunset’s mouth opened and closed a few times, but she could only manage a frustrated groan in response. “Um, you okay there?”

“I—” Sunset let her hand slide off her face and fall limply to her side. “Eh, never mind.” She glanced at her watch and did a double-take. “Crud. I’ve got to get to work, Pinkie. Can we hurry this up?”

“You got it, Captain!” Pinkie snapped a quick salute before whirling back around to face the barista.

“Alright mister, here’s the deal. I need a unicorn frappuccino, and I— nonono, hold on...” she dismissed his objection before he could speak, “I know what you’re going to say. The drink’s popular, and you’re technically sold out. Right?”

“Uh, y-yes…”

“But you do still have some of the ingredients leftover. The pink and blue fairy powder, to be exact.”

The barista’s jaw dropped. “How’d you…”

“Pinkie knows, javaman. She always knows.” Pinkie leaned over the counter and batted her eyes at him. “And Pinkie also knows you’ll be a big help and go get what she needs, right?”

“I-I guess… um, yes, I can,” he stammered. He looked quickly back to Sunset, who was leaning against a nearby display shelf. “Is she serious?” he asked.

“Very,” Sunset replied before raising her arm and making a show of tapping on her watch.

“O-okay… I’ll see what I can find. Just, stay right there.” The barista quickly darted into the back room, returning a minute later with two small plastic bottles. “Okay, I’ve got the powder. What do you need it for?”

“An experiment.” Pinkie answered.

“What kind of experiment?” the barista asked, clearly skeptical of her answer.

“Oh, you know, nothing special. Just sending them through an interdimensional portal to a parallel universe populated with talking animals that love baked goods and fairy dust.”

If not for the constant hum of the espresso machine, everyone in the cafe would have heard Sunset’s near-panicked gasp.

The barista shook his head in disbelief. “Wait, what?”

“It’s a joke, silly!” Pinkie interrupted. “What kind of crazy person do you take me for, anyway?” she added with a wink. “Look, I just want to try making unicorn drinks at home, since you’re already sold out.”

“Okay, I guess you can try, if you really want to,” he replied. “But I can’t just give you these powders, you know.”

“What?!” Pinkie was incredulous. “And why not?”

The barista clutched the bottles closer to his chest. “Because these are the secret ingredient to the whole drink. It’s what makes the whole thing work, and if the recipe ever got out and people began making these at home, it’d kill any chance of corporate ever offering the unicorn drinks again.”

“Seriously? Ugh…” Pinkie rapped her fingers on the edge of the counter and sighed. “Alright, fine. Look, then can I at least have a sample of it? A taste even?”

The barista hesitated for a second, then smiled a bit. “Well, I guess I could accidentally sprinkle these on top of a drink, instead of the stuff that it’s supposed to get.”

“Grande mocha latte?”

“Like that one, sure.”

Pinkie leaned over the counter and bopped him on the nose with a laugh. “Now that’s more like it. And make it snappy; my friend’s gotta get to work!”

Twenty-five minutes and some frenetic weaving through mid-afternoon traffic later, Sunset pulled her bike up the driveway outside of her home and dismounted. “Okay. I’ve got just under forty minutes to get changed and get to work. You going to be okay until I get back, Pinkie?”

Pinkie dismounted the bike and removed her helmet, revealing the coveted drink still – somehow – tucked into her hair. “No problem, Sunny. Worst case, I’ll text Rainbow and have her come and get me. She’s always looking for an excuse to take her car for a spin anyway.” She took a small sip and licked her lips in contentment. “Wow, this really is made with magic! Wow!”

“I’ll take your word for it,” Sunset answered as she made her way through the front door and past the small foyer. “You know where the fridge is!” Sunset added as she jogged up the stairs.

“I’ll try to save you some whipped cream this time!” Pinkie yelled back before plopping on the couch and taking another satisfied sip from her drink.

Barely fifteen minutes passed before Sunset came barreling back down the stairs, with her hair down up into a loose ponytail and her work nametag pinned to a brightly-colored polo shirt. “See ya later, Pinkie!”

Pinkie waved after her, then jumped off the couch in one motion. “Oh! Hey, Sunny?”

Sunset stopped with one foot out the door. “Yeah?”

“Can I borrow your special book for a minute? I want to let the other me know how awesome this drink is!”

“Yeah, sure. You know where I usually keep it. Just don’t forget to address it to Pinkie. Otherwise, Twilight will get the message instead.”

Pinkie snapped to attention and saluted. “Auntie Pinkie won’t let you down!”

“Thanks for the mail, Ditzy! Enjoy the drink!” Pinkie waved after the departing mailmare as the door closed behind her. She slipped the trio of bits into the register and was about to begin sorting the stack of mail when the front door swung open with a loud bang, and a loud voice filled the room.

“Pinkie Pie! Get out here now!”

She waited a second before uncovering her ears and looking up, where she spotted a familiar face. “Oh! Heya, Twilight!”

“What have you done, Pinkie?”

Pinkie gave her a quizzical look. “Just now? I put bits in the register and began sorting the mail. But earlier today I baked three dozen cookies, booked a party for Lyra, talked to Roseluck about a—”

“Pinkie...” Twilight stomped her hoof on the floor. “You know what I’m talking about!” She began taken measured steps across the room towards the counter. “What. Did. You. Do?”

“That’s not really specific, Twi…” Pinkie scratched her chin a few times in thought as Twilight crept closer. “Maybe it was… Oh! I know!” Pinkie pronked over the counter in one leap. “You must be talking about the new drinks!”

Twilight shuffled back to avoid bumping into Pinkie. “Yes! The ‘Amazing Arcane Alicorn Frappe’, if I have the name correct.”

“Great name, isn’t it though?” Pinkie said as she bounced in place. “It would’ve been even better if every word began with an ‘A’, but I couldn’t think of any good A-words that fit.” Pinkie stopped suddenly. “Wait, is that it? The name’s horrible and you want me to change it?”

“Wha– no!” Twilight huffed. “The name’s not the problem. The drink itself is; or more specifically, what’s in the drink!”

Pinkie cocked her head to the side. “I thought the Prench roast espresso would make a better flavor profile, but if you really think the Maritalian roast would be better…”

Twilight facehoofed. “For Celestia’s sake, Pinkie, it’s not the name, or the espresso. You put magic into those drinks, didn’t you?”

Pinkie leaned in close and dropped her voice to a whisper. “Yes, but you have to promise not to tell anypony. It’s the secret ingredient!”

Twilight’s eyes went wide. “Secret ingredient? Pinkie, that can be dangerous! Where’d you ever get an idea like that?”

“From the recipe, of course. Other Pinkie sent it to me the other day through Sunset’s book. Here, take a look!” Pinkie dug into the back of her mane with a hoof and produced a folded slip of paper. She hoofed it over to Twilight, who quickly took to reading it.

“Four pumps simple syrup, two or three espressos, sour and sweet filling…” Twilight’s face took on a more panicked look the further she read. “...and ‘magic powder’? “What did you use to make that powder, Pinkie?”

“Oh, nothing special,” Pinkie answered. “The Cakes only keep magic cells around for the twins’ toys, and I have to save the gems for cake decorating, so I went by Lyra’s shop and bought some there.”

“What did she sell you then? Unicorn magic? Pegasus? Something else entirely?”

“Kind of a mix, really. I told her it was just garnish for a new product, so she just took some leftover stock, whipped it up into a mixed batch, and turned it into a powder. Easy as pie, really.” Pinkie smiled. “Oh! I wonder how that powder would work in one of AJ’s pies?”

Twilight shook her head, and scanned the paper again. “A mixed batch… so that explains it then.”

“Explains what?” Pinkie asked.

“Why half the town has lost its marbles!” Twilight exclaimed. “BonBon can apparently make herself invisible now, Roseluck and Lily are sprouting entire gardens out of the ground with their hooves, and Lyra’s flying without wings! Oh, and that’s not even counting Starlight’s sudden ability to use the Royal Canterlot Voice on command, and teleport Luna to and from her bedchambers!”

Pinkie shrugged. “So, no worse than the average Tuesday around here then, and besides, think of it as a magical sugar high! The effects will wear off after a couple of hours anyway. Then again…” Pinkie paused for a moment in thought, then sidled up to Twilight and threw a hoof across her withers.

“You’re already an alicorn, Twi. Imagine what you could do with an ‘Amazing Arcane Alicorn Frappe’ in your hooves. Solve friendship issues with a mere thought, reshelve the entire library with a single spell…” Pinkie leaned closer and winked. “Teleport yourself right into Rainbow’s quarters all the way up at Wonderbolts HQ?”

Twilight blushed furiously as Pinkie pronked away back toward the counter, and after a second’s hesitation, she hurried to follow.

“Fine! But make mine a small!”