“Princess Diane Pastel, you stand accused of multiple counts of murder, arson, the wanton destruction of property both public and private, sedition, inciting rebellion…”
“Don’t forget vandalism!” The young changeling grinned widely.
“Do you not feel any remorse, young one?” Princess Luna’s tone was stern, but her eyes reflected a profound grief.
“I’m sorry that I failed.” Diane scowled. “I’m sorry that Celestia has chosen to scatter the free hive and give Decanter back to her sycophant nobles to keep as their plaything! I’m sorry that my Uncle Train Wreck didn’t rip you castle down around your flanks!”
Gasps and mutters echoed throughout the court. Luna ha hoped that by holding this hearing in the court of the night, she could keep it from become the spectacle that would have surely ensued had this trial been held in her sister’s court. Still, there was only so much that could be done. There had to be a trial. On that point her sister had been inflexible. It had been on that sticking point that she had summarily dismissed Stand In and disbanded the changeling hive.
“Order!” The princess’ command, while not as forceful as the Royal Canterlot Voice, was more than enough to silence most protest.
“Princess Diane was right!” A non-descript mare near the back shouted. “The shadow over Decanter was never the Nopony, it was Canterlot!”
The guards moved quickly to silence the mare. Too quickly, perhaps, and surely too roughly. Luna noted that she didn’t recognize these particular guards. In itself not all that unusual, she didn’t know all of the Lunar Guard by name of course, but it was enough to make her suspicious. She made a mental note to seek out Moth after this was done. The sterile queen had nearly as many crimes to answer for as did Diane herself, but she would be both useful and necessary in the task of bringing the late Madame Butterfly’s “Shadow Hive” to heel. Especially as it became more and more apparent that they could not count on any cooperation from Diane Pastel.
“Princess Diane Pastel, there can be no doubt as to your guilt.” Princess Luna sighed heavily. “I can understand your motivations, young changeling. I can understand your desire to avenge your loved ones and to protect those you see as your subjects, but the taking of pony life is never acceptable…”
“There it is!” Shadefire, Luna noted the firebrand umbrum ex- school- teacher- turned- political- activist. “It’s all about protecting the little ponies from the ‘scary’ monster races!”
“Leave her be!” Luna quickly ordered the guards back to their places, before silently adding, “Shadefire would like nothing more than to be made the martyr.”
“I will remind you all that the greatest majority of her victims were her fellow changelings. Invaders, infiltrators, saboteurs, and worse.” Luna continued, her tone grim. “Those ponies whom she victimized were known collaborators of the Nopony. Traitors who aided in the invasion of the tyrant Queen Chrysalis. It is only the severity of her actions, and her continued lack of expressed remorse that necessitates this trial at all.”
“We all know how this ends, ‘Princess’,” Diane openly spat on the floor, drawing a gasp from the assembled ponies, and an annoyed eye-roll from the Princess of the Night, “The only reason you dragged me out of Tartarus was to put on a pretty little show for all the happy little ponies. Can you get on with this farce of a trial? I have eternal damnation to get back to!”
“Diane Pastel, you would make your noble mother weep.” Luna bowed her head deeply. “Surprise Pastel was a pony of infinite mirth and forgiveness, a pony of such great virtue as to embody it. Please, if you cannot show any respect for this court, or these proceedings, at least show some respect for the memory of your adopted mother.”
For a moment rage played across the youth’s face like a tragic mask, and Luna worried that she might have to call on her guards to restrain the poor filly. But at the last moment Diane collapsed with a strangled sob of utter defeat. “Just get on with it…”
“This brings me no joy. This sentence is not an act of justice.” Luna glared throughout the court, daring any noble to show any feeling of triumph. “In this entire affair, there have been no heroes, and no villains, only victims. I do not pass sentence on you to punish you, Diane Pastel, nor do I pass any moral judgement upon you. You have been pushed further than anypony should ever be pushed. You have sacrificed your own innocence to protect those you loved from an evil beyond the imaginings of most ponies. Is Equestria to judge you in possession of guilt for the innocence you have given up on their behalf? We should think not…”
The Princess paused for a long, sad moment to allow her words to sink in fully before she continued. “However… while we cannot in good conscious judge you, likewise, we cannot allow our subjects to become the victims of your anger and bitterness, for truly, Diane Pastel, your rage knows no bounds. The order of warlocks have found a place… a world separated from Equestria. It is not a place of harmony, but you are not the daughter of harmony. It is our hope that you can learn to live there, and even to thrive. It is the hope of the Equestrian Crown that one day you may learn to find the magic of friendship that we know lies within your heart and that you will return to us. This is our judgement. Bring forward the one who claims to be ‘The Text’.”
“‘A Text', your majesty, not ‘The Text’.” A cyan pegasus with deep blue mane and a greasy smile stepped forward. “And let me be the first to thank you for sending someone to fetch us up out of Tartarus. I’m sure Diane would have thanked you herself, but teenagers, am I right?”
“Be silent.” Luna scowled. “I do not know if you are, in fact, who or what you claim to be. I do not know how you managed to infiltrate Tartarus. If you are who you claim, then you are a cruel god who has been cast amongst the ponies he has tormented. I am presented with a unique conundrum… and a unique opportunity. How does one judge an architect of suffering? By your own admission, you created the Nopony and unleashed him upon our subjects. Why? Because you thought it might be amusing. You have wreaked untold havoc upon Prince Silver Watch…”
“Not it!” The pegasus proclaimed cheerfully. “The whole Iam Noone in Equestria ordeal, that was my fault, and I really do feel bad about that. And what happened with Train Wreck. I really liked him. He was like me, if I were much less of a bad person. But Prince Silver Ships is not in my jurisdiction. Not my circus, not my human.”
“Enough! Count yourself lucky, fiend, that the heir of the Unspoken prince is so fond of you.” Luna bared her teeth in her anger. “You may join her in exile, and know that you shall be held to account! It shall fall on you to ascertain that the young princess is not harmed, nor allowed to bring harm to the natives of that world. Guards, take them away. This has been a tiring and filthy affair, let Equestria be done with it.”
