The Pinkie Games

by King of Madness

Rating: everyone
Tags: Limestone Pie, Main 7 (EqG), Random, Maud Pie, Marble Pie, Equestria Girls, Comedy
Length: 10349

Pinkie Pie forces her friends to participate in a series of games. A parody of Saw.

Sunset, Rarity, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Twilight wake up in separate rooms after being fed drug-laced cupcakes. They find themselves forced to participate in a series of games that end in humiliation should they fail.

Pinkie has outdone herself.

A Saw parody. Takes place between Friendship Games and Legend of Everfree.

Inspired by a conversation with Vertigo22.

Awesome artwork by Grim_Grin.

Published 2017-06-17 03:40:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-08-20 18:57:40 UTC

I Wouldn't Eat Those Cupcakes

No one had questioned Pinkie Pie when she asked them to attend a 'special' party at her house. Sunset Shimmer, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Twilight Sparkle, Applejack, and Rarity had all been free that day, so why wouldn't they attend? Each of them were curious as to what was so 'special' about the party, but everytime they asked Pinkie, she would start giggling and say "It's a supriiiise!".

The party was at Pinkie's house in what she called her party room. It was pretty much her own personal living room. According to Maud, their parents had it built for Pinkie so that she could be herself and not mess up the neatness of the house. The party had, up to that point, been like any other Pinkie Pie Party. Balloons; games; random blasts from her party cannon; Gummy getting into the punch bowl (much to Rarity's disgust); the whole nine yards. It was as fun as any other Pinkie Pie party, but none of the girls could figure out what was so 'special' about it.

Eventually, Pinkie left to the kitchen and came back with a tray of cupcakes. "Hey, everybody! Come get your cupcakes! I made each one special for each of you! See!"

The others looked and saw that their were seven cupcakes, each with a different color of frosting. There was a cyan-frosted one for Rainbow Dash. A purple-frosted one for Twilight. A light pink-frosted one for Fluttershy. An orange-frosted one for Applejack. A white-frosted one for Rarity. A yellow-frosted one for Sunset. And, of course, a dark pink-frosted one for Pinkie Pie herself.

Each girl took their respective cupcake and dug in.

"Tastes great, Pinkie." Sunset complimented after swallowing. "Though, it tastes a little... different."

Pinkie giggled as she licked frosting off her lip. "Oh, I've been trying this, hehe, new recipe."

"Uh-huh," Sunset couldn't help but feel like something was up, but she wasn't sure what it was. "So, Pinkie, when are you gonna tell us the 'special' part of this special party?"

Rainbow nodded. "Yeah; when are you gonna spill the beans?"

Pinkie had an unusually sinister smile on her face as she looked at each of her friends. She looked at her watch and chuckled. "Well, I guess I can tell you all now. Hehe. Okay, I've been working on something totally amazing that I want you all to be part of!"

That got the girls' interested.

"'Totally amazing' you say?" Rainbow liked the sound of that.

"Pray tell, what sort of project are..." Rarity shook her head. "Uh, pardon me, darling. I... I feel dizzy all the sudden."

"Yeah, Ah feel dizzy too." Applejack held her head.

Sunset felt it to. She looked to see the other girls were feeling the same way. She looked down at her hands as her vision started becoming blurry. "Pi...Pinkie... What was... in that..." That's all Sunset could get out before she fell to the floor unconscious.

The others followed suit, leaving only Pinkie still standing.

Pinkie proceeded to do an evil laugh that she had been working on. "MWAHAHAHAHAHA AHAHAHAHAHA! Now, if only I had some lightning..."

At that moment, Maud entered the room.

Pinkie turned and smiled at her sister. "Oh, hi, Maud."

"Hi, Pinkie." Maud greeted in her monotone voice. She looked behind her sister and took in the scene. "...Why are your friends unconscious on the floor?"

"Oh, because I baked crushed up sleeping pills into their cupcakes. I even covered each one with a different colored frosting so that I new which one wasn't drugged." Pinkie explained.

"Interesting. But why did you drug them?"

"Well, I saw this really scary movie where this creepy guy with a really creepy puppet makes people escape from death traps. At first, I was like 'that's so horrible' but after a while I started thinking 'maybe I can make that fun'. So, I've been working on a series of rooms underneath the house with what I like to call 'prank traps'!" Pinkie's smile widened. "And I'm gonna give them instructions on how to get out just like in the movie! And if they fail, they get pranked! It's gonna be so much fun!"

Maud stared at her excited sister for a moment. "...Are you sure they won't be mad?"

Pinkie shrugged. "Meh, maybe a little at first. But once it's all said and done, they'll realize how much fun they had and we'll all have a good laugh!" She stated with certainty.

"If you say so."

Pinkie looked to her sleeping friends then back to Maud. "Would you mind, uh, helping me get them to the prank rooms?" She asked sheepishly.

"Sorry, Pinkie. When they get out, I want to be able to say I had nothing to do with it. So, no." With that, Maud turned and left.

Pinkie turned around and picked up her toothless baby alligator. "Well, looks like it's just you and me, Gummy."

Gummy licked one of his eyes.

Pinkie plopped herself down in a rolling chair and turned on the cameras. Six screens flashed to live and showed the images from each camera. Camera 1/1 showed Fluttershy. Camera 1/2 showed Sunset. Camera 1/3 showed Rainbow Dash. Camera 1/4 showed Twilight. Camera 1/5 showed Rarity. Camera 1/6 showed Applejack. All the girls were still asleep.

"Camera's are okie-doki-loki!" Pinkie then turned on six of the trap timers one by one. Each timer was connected to their respective screen and would allow Pinkie to control when the time alarms are set on the traps. "Prank Trap Timers are fully functioning!" She pressed a button that said 'Puppet'.

A few yards away from the party girl, sitting atop Pinkie's party cannon, a puppet resembling Pinkie's pony counterpart roared to life. In front of the puppet was a camera that would broadcast the puppet to each of Pinkie's friends via screens in the prank rooms. Pinkie had wired the puppet's mouth to move in response to voices, giving it the impression that it was talking. "Puppet ready for action!"

She brought a voice changer like the one she saw in Scream to her mouth. "Voice changer... working!" She said in a dark, distorted voice that perfectly matched the one she had heard from Saw. "Woah! I sound creepy! Hehe! I will eat your soul, mortal!" Pinkie laughed and set down the voice changer. She had already ran the tests with the microphone and speakers, so everything was in place.

Pinkie spun around in her chair to look at Gummy, who was playing with a ball of yarn. "Everything's perfect, Gummy! I even measured how much sleeping powder I put in each cupcake to make sure they wake up one at a time and I can give each of them instructions as soon as they wake up!" The party girl smiled big in pure delighted. "Oh, this is so awesome!" She turned to face the screen and put on her game face. "Now, let the games... begin."

The Pie Mask

The first thing that Fluttershy noticed as she started waking up was a sweet aroma. The next thing she noticed was that her head felt heavy, as if she was wearing an oversized helmet. She opened her eyes and the first thing she saw was... a pie. Judging from the aroma, it was a raspberry pie. Fluttershy lifted her head and, to her surprise, the pie moved with her. It was right in front of her, held right below chin-level by some kind of metal contraption. Fluttershy then realized the contraption holding the pie was also on her head, which explained why her head felt so heavy.

Fluttershy, realizing she was sitting in a steel chair, tried to move only to find that her hands were tied behind her back. She looked back to see a metal pole directly behind the chair. Her arms were between the opening behind the chair, tied behind the pole with rope. Now, she was scared.

She nervously looked around the room, which was dimly lit by a a few light bulbs dangling from the ceiling, and saw that the floor was covered by what appeared to be a bunch of keys, but nothing else. "H-Hello?" She called out. "Is... Is anyone there?"

Suddenly, a TV screen flashed to life on the wall directly in front of her. What appeared on screen was a puppet that resembled a cute pink pony with a red bow tie. "Hello, Fluttershy." It said to her.

Fluttershy jumped in her seat when she heard the voice. Hearing a voice so... demonic-sounding come from such a cute puppet horrified the poor girl.

"I want to play game." The puppet said sinisterly. "The device on your head is what I like to call the Pie Mask. One half of the mask is around your head while the other half holds a pie. In five minutes, starting from when this message ends, the mask will connect and you will receive a pie to the face. However, on the back of the mask, there is a lock that will allow you to take it off. The key to it is hidden in the room."

Fluttershy looked across the room at the hundreds of keys and started crying, really not wanting to be pied in the face; not in such a scary, pressure-inducing way.

"Don't worry, Fluttershy." The puppet continued. "I'll give you a hint: The key is not where you would expect it to be."

"Wh-Who are you? Wh-Why are you doing this?"

She could have sworn the puppet giggled. "It's a surpriiiise."

Fluttershy's eyes widened. "Pinkie?"

"Let the games begin. Good luck."

"Wait! I-I can't even get out of this chair!" Fluttershy pleaded.

"Oh, don't worry. It's a loose knot. You can wiggle your hands out." The screen changed to 5:00... 4:59... 4:58... 4:57...

In a panic, Fluttershy quickly wiggled her hand free and got up, rubbing her wrists as she looked across the floor that was littered with keys. With sweat running down her face and her heart beating so hard it made her ribs hurt, she started picking up keys at random, hoping and praying one would work. A small part of her knew she was overreacting and that a pie wouldn't hurt her, but the situation at hand made it scary and causing her to think irrationally.

With shaky hands, she fit key after key into the lock; none of them saving her from her fate.

3:12... 3:11... 3:10...

Fluttershy realized that she wasn't getting anywhere. "Okay... Okay... Calm down, Fluttershy. You can do this! Now, what did Pinkie say?"

I'll give you a hint: The key is not where you would expect it to be.

That's when it hit Fluttershy. "It's not any of the keys on the floor. But then... where is it?" In desperation, Fluttershy searched the walls of the room for a key, thinking one may be hidden in the walls.

1:25... 1:24... 1:23...

Fluttershy looked through each wall and corner and found nothing. She even checked the screen and noticed a door opposite from where she had been sitting. She tried opening it, but to no avail. She was getting more and more anxious, forcing herself to not look at the timer. She gulped and scanned the room. The only other thing there, aside from herself and the keys, was... the chair.

0:27... 0:26... 0:25...

Fluttershy ran to the chair and crouched down to look under it. Low and behold, there was a key taped to the bottom on the chair. She picked away at the tape and got the key.

0:11... 0:10... 0:09...

Fluttershy brought the key to the lock behind her head, but her hands were shaking too much to get it in. She steeled herself as best as she could and managed to get the key in. She heard a click and felt the mask loosing. In a flash, she pulled off the device and threw it on the ground just as it closed.

She sighed with relief and put her hands on her knees. She took several deep breaths before the screen changed from 0:00 to the puppet again.

"Wow! That was a really really close one! Ahem. Please proceed to the next room."

The door automatically opened to another room.

Fluttershy stood in silence for a moment before sighing and walking into the next room. "Maybe that was the only bad thing..." She let out an 'eep' as the door shut and locked behind her. "...Though I doubt it."

The Hose

As Sunset slowly awoke, she felt her arms aching. She tried to stretch only to find that her arms were stuck above her head. She blinked her eyes open and took in the room she was in. The room was lit by four dim light bulbs that illuminated the room in an eerie way. Directly in front on her, about five feet away, there was what appeared to be a water hose propped up by black... prop ups. It was bigger than a yard hose, but smaller than a fireman's hose... and it was pointed right at her. To the left of the hose, there was a TV on top of a small black table. She looked up to find her arms chained above her, dungeon-style, from a contraption about ten feet above her.

Sunset quickly tried to assess the situation. The last thing she remembered before passing out was... "Pinkie?!" Sunset called out.

Right after she called out, the TV flashed on, showing a cute but at the same time creepy puppet that resembled Pinkie's pony counterpart. "Hello, Sunset." The puppet said in a demon-like voice. Hearing such a voice come from a pink party pony puppet was uncanny and silly at the same time; Sunset really wasn't sure if she should have been scared or amused. "I want to play a game."

"Pinkie, what are you doing?" Sunset asked in annoyance. "And where are the others?"

"You want answers? You'll have to beat the game. Now listen, there is a button that will unlock your shackles and allow you the leave to the next room... but there's a catch. The button is on top of the mechanism above you. The only way to get to it is to climb... and every time you hit the floor, that hose in front of you will squirt you with water. Like this."

The hose fired a blast of water right into Sunset's face.

The bacon-haired girl kicked and squirmed as she was blasted. Once it was over, she spat out the water in her mouth and glared at the puppet.

"Let the games begin. Good luck." The TV flashed and turned into a picture of a kitten trying to climb onto a bed with the words 'You Can Do It!" on the bottom of the screen.

Sunset sighed and got up. Knowing she had no choice but to play Pinkie's game, she pushed her hair out her face and looked up at the contraption above her. Despite knowing she couldn't reach it, she foolishly decided to jump. Right after her feet returned to the floor, another blast of water hit her right in the butt. Caught off guard, Sunset face planted into the wall and fell on her knees, getting her back and hair soaked in the process.

Once the hose stopped, Sunset rubbed her face and took a deep breath. "'Every time I hit the ground'... Right." Glancing back at the hose before looking to the device above her, Sunset pondered how to get to it. When she lifted her arm to slick hair back, she took notice of the chain and how it connected to the device. The solution was clear: She had to climb. She took the two chains in her hands and brought them together. She gave them a yank to make sure it was sturdy and took another deep breath before putting her foot on the wall.

With some hesitation, she lifted her other foot up onto a wall. "Heh, this isn't so hard." She stated before lifting her other foot and slipping. She fell on her butt and got another blast of water. As she got up and rubbed her sore backside, she took notice of the wet footprints on the wall. It then dawned on Sunset that the real reason Pinkie Pie had given her a 'demonstration' was so her boot would already be slick and make it harder for her to climb.

Gritting her teeth, Sunset got the chains together once more and got back to climbing. Despite how slippery her boots were, Sunset remained steady, not wanting to fall and get even more drenched. As she got closer and closer to her goal, she could feel her confidence building... until she slipped and fell on her back. Apparently, The Hose had a target seeker because, despite Sunset being flat on her back, she still got blasted.

Sunset slowly sat up and crossed her legs under her. When she had been Princess Celestia's student, the princess had taught her ways of remaining calm in infuriating situations. At the time, she hadn't taken it to heart, but now that she was a different person, she could put those lessons to use. She put her hands in her lap, closed her eyes, and softly hummed to herself. After a while of meditating, she took a deep breath and opened her eyes. She got up, stretched, and got ready to try again. She almost started jumping as she readied herself, but remembered the consequences for doing so before she could make that mistake.

She once again brought the chains together and put her foot on the wall. One slick foot after the other, Sunset slowly and steadily climbed up to the box. She paused each time to keep herself steady and got closer and closer to the device. However, once she was only a two feet away, she slipped. But this time, she had managed to hang on to the chains. She wrapped her legs around the chain and pulled herself up to the device. Once she had reached the black box-like contraption, she raised her hand and hit the top of it, hoping that she would hit the button. She did.

With a click, the shackles fell off her wrists. Sunset sighed with relief... and then lost her grip. She fumbled at the chain and slowed her fall, but landed hard on the ground regardless, earning her another blast of water.

The TV flashed back to Pinkie's puppet. "Well done, Sunset. I was starting to get worried, but you pulled through! Now, you may-"

Sunset grabbed the TV and smashed it screen first on top of the hose, destroying both objects. She sighed with relief before the door on the other side of the room opened. She rolled her eyes and walked to the door. "Well, at least I won't have to shower tonight." She walked through the door, which shut and locked behind her

Batter Tester

"Ugh... What happened?" Rainbow Dash groaned as she woke up. She opened her eyes to find herself in a dimly lit room. She spotted a TV a few feet from her and a door on the opposite side of the room... Hold on, why was the door opposite down and on the ceiling? Suddenly feeling dizzy, she noticed that her arms were above her and found that she couldn't nor could she move her legs. She looked down and saw that her ankles were tied by a rope that was wrapped around a hook attached to a chain. Said chain was hooked to a mechanism that reached the ceiling... Wait, the ceiling?!

Rainbow looked up and saw what looked like a giant bowl of cake batter directly under her.

"Am I seriously being suspended over giant bowl of cake batter right now?" She asked to no one in particular. She looked to the TV and saw that it was being suspended from a rope attached the ceiling; dangling upside down along with Rainbow.

Suddenly, the TV flashed on and the weirdest looking puppet ever appeared on screen. "Hello, Rainbow Dash." The creepy puppet said in an even creepier voice, though Rainbow was too weirded out (and awesome) to be scared. "I want to play a game."

"What the..." It suddenly dawned on Rainbow that this could only be the work of one person. "Pinkie, what the heck is going on?!"

"You want answers? You have to play the game." The puppet explained. "Right now, you are currently being held over a bowl of cake batter that I made myself. There is only one way to get down." The screen flashed and now showed an unplayed game of hangman. There were twelve blank spots for the words with a space in the middle. Two six letter words "We are going to play hangman. Get a letter wrong? You will be lowered a scooch. Get four wrong? You will dipped into the batter. Get a letter right? You will be raised a scooch... if you've lowered already, that is. Complete the game? You will be released to the side. It's as simple as that."

Rainbow groaned. "Come on, Pinkie! You know I'm not into word games."

"That's what makes this fun. Let the games begin. Good luck."

"Pinkie!?"

No response.

Realizing that Pinkie wasn't going to respond and that there was no way out of this, Rainbow frowned and crossed her arms. She thought about sitting up and undoing her binds from where she was at, but realized, if she did, she would just end up dropping herself into the batter and be forced to swim out of it. She stared at the screen for a long moment and sighed. "Well, I guess I have no choice."

Rainbow tried to think of a word that would go with the layout. Something with two words; each with six letters. When she failed to think of anything, she decided to just start throwing out letters. The figured the best way to do so was to start going through the alphabet like back in Kindergarten. "A?"

A pink hand, undoubtedly Pinkie's, drew an A above one of the blanks.

__ A __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __

Rainbow's eyes widened in surprise when she got it right. "Oh, heh, I got it! Um, B?

B A __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __

" Oh, yeah! Two in a row!" Rainbow bragged as she pumped her fist in the air. "C?"

Though Rainbow would never admit it, she yelped when she dropped slightly.

"Okay, um, D?"

She dropped lower.

Realizing she was only two wrong answers away from being dipped into a thing of batter, Rainbow bit her lip in hesitation. "...E?"

B A __ __ E __ __ E __ __ E __

Rainbow was raised a notch.

"Oh, come on! Three lines filled and I only get raised one notch?!" Rainbow facepalmed and groaned. "Well, at least I have three chances now instead of two. F?"

She was lowered back down to where she previously was.

"Dangit! G?"

She was lowered again.

Rainbow winced and looked up, err, down to see her beautiful hair chilling on the surface of the batter. She looked over the screen and tried to piece together what the words could be. However, she drew a blank. "Ugh, why couldn't Pinkie have gotten Sunset or Twilight to do this?" Having no good alternatives, Rainbow stuck to her method. "H?"

The next second, Rainbow was up to her waist in cake batter. When she was pulled out and reset in her original place, the entire upper half of her body was as yellow as Fluttershy's skin. She shook her hands and wiped her face before glaring at the screen. She stared for a moment before licking the batter off her figures, "Hmm, not bad."

She continued on with her tactic of going through the alphabet and was dipped two more times before hitting a bingo.

"Q?"

Lowered.

"R?"

B A __ __ E R __ E __ __ E R

Rainbow was surprised when she was raised up as Pinkie wrote the letters down. "...That was right? That was right! Finally!" Rainbow sighed and continued. "S?"

B A __ __ E R __ E S __ E R

"Heh, right again. Um, T?"

B A T T E R T E S T E R

When Rainbow saw the completed words, she smirked and shook her head. "Pinkie, you are an evil genius."

The contraption that controlled the chain brought Rainbow to the side and gently lowered her to the ground. Once she was on the ground, Rainbow sat up and undid the bindings on her ankles. It took a moment for her to stand up, but she managed as the TV flashed back to the puppet. "Congratulations, Dashie. You may now leave to the next room."

The door on the other side of the room opened up.

Rainbow blew a raspberry in annoyance before walking over to the doorway; absentmindedly sucking the the batter off her fingers as she did. "Well, at least it tastes good." She stepped in and the door shut and locked behind her.

The Jumpscare Quiz

Twilight Sparkle awoke and opened her eyes. She lifted her head up to find herself sitting in front of a computer. She looked around her to find that she was in a chair with her arms and legs shackled, a quick jerk proving that they were locked tight. The computer was on a desk attached to the chair like the ones in school and Twilight noticed that there was also a key board; here hands having just enough movement to type. She was in dimly lit room and a glance behind the computer told her that the door was on the opposite side of said room.

"What the..." Then Twilight remembered what happened before she blacked out. "Pinkie, what's going on?!"

The computer flashed on and the screen showed a puppet of a pony that bared a resemblance to Pinkie Pie. "Hello, Twilight." It greeted in a voice that sent chills down Twilight's spine. "I want to play a game."

"Well, I have a feeling that I won't enjoy whatever game you're thinking of, so I'll pass." Twilight deadpanned, slightly disturbed by the demonic-sounding puppet.

"Oh, don't knock it 'till you try it. Now, listen. In order to escape this room, you have to answer twenty questions correctly. But there's a catch. If you get an answer wrong, you will be jumpscared."

Twilight's eyes widened. "Wait, no! No, Pinkie! I-I have a really bad history with jumpscares!"

"All the more motivation to succeed, silly." Hearing the word 'silly' come from a voice like that struck Twilight as just being weird. "Don't worry, Twilight. You're great with tests; I have full confidence in you. Let the games begin. Good luck." The screen changed to the first question.

Twilight closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Okay, Twilight. Pinkie's right, you can do this." Twilight opened her eyes and bit her lips. "And if you don't, you're gonna have a heart attack... or wet yourself. Not sure which would be worse." With another deep breath, she read the first question.

Why did the toilet paper cross the road?

"Oh, no... It's joke questions." Twilight realized. Luckily, even she could see right through this one. "To get to the bottom?" She asked as she typed it out.

There was a ding as the next question popped up.

What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

Twilight deducted that this was gonna be a bad pun and rolled her eyes. "A Boomewrong?" She typed it out.

For two seconds the screen was filled with a horrifying picture accompanied by a bone-chilling screech. AAAAAAHCK!

Twilight screamed and reeled back at the jumpscare. Once the screen returned to the question, she took a moment to compose herself. "Goshdangit! How am I supposed to know?!" She asked Pinkie, who refused to answer. She sighed and went over the question. "...Maybe it's one of those jokes where the humor comes from the obviousness of the answer." Deciding it was worth a try, she tried to bring logic into it. "Well, if a boomerang didn't work, wouldn't it just be a plain..." She winced and typed in her answer. "A stick?" She steeled herself for another jumpscare.

Ding.

"Oh, thank goodness."

What do boobies and martinis have in common?

"Excuse me?" Twilight said out loud at the odd question. She thought for a second and raised an eyebrow as she typed. "One is not enough and three is too many?"

Ding.

Twilight chuckled. "Okay, that was pretty good."

What do you call a row of white rabbits hopping backwards?

Twilight set her jaw as she went over the question. "Okay, there must be something to how this is worded. A row of white rabbits... hopping backwards. A row... of white rabbits... hopping backwards..." It dawned on Twilight what the answer was. "A receding hare line?"

Ding.

Twilight smirked and nodded. "Clever, Pinkie. Very clever."

What horse never comes out at night?

Twilight rolled her eyes. "A nightmare?

Ding.

What do you get from a pampered cow?

"Spoiled Milk?"

Ding.

"Heh, this isn't so hard."

Why do seagulls live near the sea?

Twilight figured this was another obviousness joke "Because they are seagulls."

AAAAAAHCK!

Twilight's scream caught in her throat, coming out as a mere whimper. "...What?" She asked weakly. "I thought that was right. Um... There must be a pun in here." She decided. "Because they are not landgulls?"

AAAAAAHCK!

Twilight reeled back and forced her breathing back on track. "Pinkie... You're gonna give me a heart attack." She took a deep breath and tried to better process the question. "Well, seagulls live around the bay..." If it weren't for the restrants, she would have facepalmed. "Because if they lived near the bay, they would be called bagels?"

Ding.

Twilight sighed with relief. "That wasn't fair, Pinkie. That joke could have been taken in multiple directions!"

What will find furniture in a dark room?

"I'm guessing a flashlight is out of the question?" Twilight thought about her own experiences with dark rooms and how she came upon furniture; usually by hitting her... "A shin?"

Ding.

Why are fish easy to weigh?

"...Because they have their own scales?"

Ding.

On a turkey, which side would you find the most feathers?

"But most turkeys have an even amount on each side," Twilight contemplated. "Unless you mean... The outside?"

Ding.

"Hehe. Okay, we're halfway through."

If a cat has nine lives, what has more?

Twilight racked her brain, trying to think of an animal that would fit the joke. "Umm... Oh, boy." She ran through the animal kingdom, trying to find something about each animal that would work with the joke. After a few moment, she hit a bingo. "A frog because it croaks all the time?"

Ding.

Why did the room full of married people seem empty?

"Married people..." It only took a moment for it to hit Twilight. "Because there wasn't a single person there?"

Ding.

How do you discipline a rock?"

"...You hit rock bottom?"

Ding.

I can jump higher than a house. Do you know why?

Thoughts of trampolines, pogo sticks, and Pinkie being Pinkie went through Twilight's head, but none of them felt right. "Well, logically, for someone to jump higher than a house... Or am I reading it wrong?" Twilight went through the question in her head and hit another bingo. "Because houses can't jump?"

Ding.

What path do crazy people take through the woods?

"...The psycho path?"

Ding.

"Alright, just five left."

What was the name of the person who made King Arthur's Round Table?

"What? The novels never said anything about..." Again, Twilight's restraints kept her from smacking herself. "It's a joke, Twilight. Ugh... Well, let's see. King Arthur ruled in medieval times..." Twilight could feel the joke. It was on the tip of her brain. "Knights of the Round Table...... Knights of the Round Table..." Twilight couldn't help but smile once she got it. "Sir Cumferance?"

Ding.

Twilight giggled. "Thank you for that one, Pinkie."

Why is it hard for leopards to play hide and seek?

"...Because they're always spotted?"

Ding.

What is red and smells like blue paint?

"Doesn't all paint smell the same... Oh... Red paint?"

Ding.

What do you call a bear without an ear?

Now, Twilight was stuck on that one. "Umm... Let's see. What looks like a bear without ears?" She once again started listing through animals, but she couldn't think of any that fit the description. "Hmm... Maybe it's another super obvious answer." Going with that, she started typing. "An earless bear?" She answered confidently.

AAAAAAHCK!

Caught off guard, Twilight jumped and made the entire chair, computer and all, jump with her. "Good Grief! Ugh... I bite my tongue." She took a deep breath and tried to ignore her sore tongue. "What is it then?" She read through the question again and started noticing something. "...Wait a minute." She looked through it again and finally saw it. "Oh, for the love of... B?"

Ding.

Twilight sighed. "Alright, just one more."

What is purple, has four eyes, and gets along great with dogs?

"Purple... Four eyes... Dogs..." Twilight gave the screen a dry look. "Twilight Sparkle?"

Ding.

The screen changed to the puppet again. "Well done. Now, you may leave to the next room."

The shackles came undone as the desk opened to the side like a door, allowing Twilight to get up and stretch. She noticed the door open up and slowly made her way to it. "I really hope this is the last of... whatever this is." She stepped into the room and the door shut and locked behind her. "...Probably shouldn't have said that."

The Ice Cream Pit

Rarity let out a groan as she woke up, opening her eyes to find herself in a dimly lit room, laying on the cold hard floor. She pushed herself off the ground and stood up, putting her hands on her back and popping it with a loud crack. "What on Earth?" She muttered as she looked around. There was a door opposite of her and a pit of some kind a few yards away from it. Between the two, there was a TV atop a black table.

Curious, Rarity slowly walked over to the circular pit, which had a circumference of about six feet from the looks of it, and looked down to see... "Is that... ice cream?" Indeed, about five and a half feet into the pit, there was a lake of ice cream. From the looks of it, there was every flavor of ice cream in the known world in that pit. Rarity couldn't help her mouth watering. "Oh my... That certainly looks delicious. Such temptation..." Then a crucial detail hit Rarity, causing her to back off. "Hold on just a moment! I have been kidnapped!" She glared at the pit of gluttonous temptation with spite. "Nice try, but my mother warned me about accepting sweets from strangers. Especially from a stranger whose face I haven't even seen and has put me in a room where... Hold on. How did this happen?"

Rarity thought back to what had happened just before she fell asleep and she finally realized who the culprit was. "Pinkie Pie, darling, if this is some kind of prank..."

Suddenly, the TV flashed on, catching Rarity's attention. The screen displayed a puppet that would resemble Pinkie were she a pony. "Hello, Rarity." It greeted in an atrocious voice. "I want to play a game."

"Pinkie?" Rarity raised an eyebrow as she walked up to the table to get a better look at the puppet. "...Goodness, darling, is that the best design you could come up with?"

"You want answe- Wait, what?" The puppet stammered.

"Don't get me wrong, it's a fine design, but it leaves much to be desire." Rarity explained. "For one thing, the choice of making it a wooden puppet makes it far too stiff. Making the puppet operate as a traditional marionette would make it far more appealing."

"W-Well, I, uh..."

"And the design itself tries too hard to be in the uncanny valley. It's too clean cut. A deliberate scar or missing appendage would go a long way. Really, you should have came to me before doing this."

"I-I didn't, uh, I never thought, uh..."

"And, darling, why would you choose to use such a low, dark voice? It just doesn't match up with the puppet. A little girl voice or even a clown-like voice would have worked so much better. As it is, it's just silly."

"..."

"Just giving you my thoughts." Rarity said with a shrug.

"...You want answers? You must complete the game. Now, listen. The door to the next room is locked. In order to exit, you must acquire the key that is hidden inside what I like to call 'The Ice Cream Pit'."

Rarity looked from the pit to the puppet and crossed her arms. "I hope don't expect me to jump into the pit to find it." She deadpanned. "I am willing to do many things in humoring you, darling, but I must draw the line here. The stains would be devastating!"

"Oh, lighten up, Rarity. It won't be so bad. Besides, at least you get free ice cream."

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Very funny."

"Let the games begin. Good luck." The screen changed to a picture of kitten jumping from a couch to a table with the words 'Believe in Yourself' at the bottom.

Rarity let out a 'humpf' and turned away from the TV as if it were a person. "Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you, Pinkie, but I cannot allow myself to participate in this nonsense."

30 seconds later...

"I mean it, Pinkie Pie. I will not participate."

25 seconds later...

"No, ma'am. Not going to do it."

15 seconds later...

Rarity sighed and walked over to the pit. "I hope your enjoying this, Pinkie." She said with annoyance before jumping in. She landed on her bare knees in the pond of cold, sugary goodness. She shivered as the icy feeling immediately hit her, goosebumps crawling over her body as she stuck her hands in it, trying to find the key. To her dismay, the ice cream had been partially melted; not only causing her to sink deeper, but also making the stains on her beautiful outfit worse. "Oh, goodness gracious..." She muttered.

She continued to search for they key for what felt like hours, shamelessly helping herself to some of the ice cream in the process. It may not have been ladylike, but she felt that she deserved a reward for going through with this. She shivered and groaned as it continued. Occasionally, she would have to pull out her hands and rubbed them together to regain feeling in them. It got even worse when she discovered that Pinkie had put ice cream cones in there as well, which are apparently rather painful when you unknowingly stick your hand into the sharp part. "Ow! Pinkie, was that really necessary?!"

She continued to dig and dig, searching through the ice cream and random condiments and whatever else Pinkie snuck in there to find that goshdarned key. Her hands and legs had gone completely numb and her dress was ruined. Even her hair was ruined by this travesty of a prank. "When I get out of here, I am going to give Pinkie Pie a piece of my mind... and perhaps a good kick in the derriere." She muttered.

After what felt like an eternity (though it was really just a few minutes), Rarity's hand wrapped around something and she pulled it out. She gasped when she saw it was the key. "The key! I've got it!" She clumsily got to her feet and throw the key out of the pit before waddling stiffly to the wall of the pit and climbing out. Once she was out, she laid on her back on the floor.

The TV screen returned to the puppet. "Well done, Rarity. You've gotten the key."

The door automatically opened.

Rarity sat up and stared at the opened door. "...What?" She got up and confronted the TV. "The door was automatic the whole time?! What was the point of getting the key?!"

"The key is for what lies ahead." The puppet said with a chuckle before the screen flashed and turned to black.

Rarity stared at the TV for a moment before sighing and walking over to the key, picking it up before heading to the next room. "The things I put up with for my friends..." She stepped into the room and the door shut and locked behind her.

Mystery Boxes

"Ugh... What in tarnation?" Applejack stirred awake to find herself in a dimly lit- Ehh, you get the point. She pushed herself off the ground and took a look around. She was in the middle of the room and was surrounded by ten pink boxes. A door laid ahead of her and, standing between her and it was a TV on a small black table. Feeling like something was missing, Applejack subconsciously lifted a hand to her head and fond her hat missing.

"What the heck is goin' on here?" Applejack asked to no one in particular. She remembered back to the party and you know the rest. "Pinkie? Pinkie, what's goin' on?!"

There was a flash as the TV turned on, revealing the single creepiest puppet Applejack had ever seen. "Hello, Applejack." The pink pony puppet greeted in a voice that reminded Applejack of one of her uncles. "I want to play a game."

Applejack gave the TV a dry look. "Well, Ah don't feel like playin' whatever ya have in mind. So, why don't ya just get me outta here?"

"Oh, don't worry. I'll let you out and you will get answers. But first, you have to play the game."

Applejack, dry look still on her face, raised an eyebrow. "Ya pullin' mah leg, right?"

"No."

"Darn it."

"Now, listen. In order to leave the room, you must get your hat back. It's hidden in one of the boxes surrounding you. However, if you open the wrong one, you find a little surprise. Hehehe."

"Uh-huh... Well, I gotta better idea. How about you just go ahead an' give me back mah hat an' let me outta here and I won't put mah boot in ya rear end?"

"Tempting, AJ, but no can do. The game will start now. Good luck." The screen flashed and showed a picture of a kitten dipping it's paw into a pool of water with that words 'Be Careful' at the bottom.

Applejack sighed and shook her head. "Alright then. Ah guess Ah'll just have to choose one'a these here boxes." She eyed each box, listening to her gut for which of them held her hat and key out of there. Unfortunately, her gut was on break, so she had to pick at random. Deciding on one, Applejack approached the box and hesitantly took the top off. As soon as she did, an apple pie was launched into her face, knocking her on her butt.

She wiped her face off and glared at the TV. "Really?" With a groan, she got up and approached another box. More cautious this time, she distanced herself as she reached out and grabbed the lid of the box. She swiftly pulled it off and backed away. When nothing happened, she determined it safe and looked inside... only to get another pie in the face, knocking her back down.

Applejack grunted as she wiped her face off again and approached another box. Preparing herself, she pulled the lid off and narrowly dodged the pie that was launched at her. "Ha- Ugh!" Her victory was short lived as she laughed at the box only to get another pie launched into her face, knocking her back down. "Ya gotta be kiddin' me." She said with a sigh before wiping her face off and getting back up.

Seeing as there were still seven boxes left and not wanting to get another pie to the face, Applejack contemplated her next move. Taking a physical approach wasn't working, so she had to use her wits. "Let's see here..." After some thinking, she realized something. "Hold on, if there's a pie in a box, the scent should be strong enough to smell from outside." Going with this, she kneeled before another box and take a whiff. She could indeed smell apple pie. She went to the next one and took a whiff. Nothing.

Thinking she had it won, Applejack opened the box... and got a water balloon launched into her face. Applejack stared off into the distance, her eye twitching as water dripped off her face. "...I've about lost mah patience, Pinkie." It was then that Applejack decided to just go on and take whatever was thrown at her. With only half of the boxes checked, Applejack grabbed a lid at random and prepared for impact... only to find her beloved stetson sitting in it. The cowgirl blinked a few times to make sure her eyes weren't deceiving her before taking her hat out of the box.

The TV flashed and Pinkie's puppet reappeared. "Well done. Now that you have your hat, the-" That's all she got to say before Applejack superkicked the TV, breaking the screen and knocking it to the ground.

Applejack dusted off her hat and placed it on her head as the door opened. "Well, at least this is over." She said as she went through the door, only for it to shut and lock behind her. She pursed her lips. "Spoke too soon?"

Sisterly Advice

"I think Applejack may be a little annoyed." Pinkie mused with disappointment as Applejack exited her room. "Oh, well. I have some great things in store for my friends." She turned to Gummy, who was on the floor, chewing on a rubber ball. "You know what I mean?"

The baby alligator made no physical indication that he was acknowledging Pinkie's existence.

"I totally agree, Gummy!" Pinkie turned to the monitors. "It's time for Round Two."

However, before Pinkie could start anything, there was a sound of a door opening and shutting behind her. She turned to see a dark-violet girl with silver hair down one half of her head walking over to her.

"Limestone!" Pinkie jumped out of her seat to greet her eldest sister.

"Hey, Pinkie." Limestone greeted with no intentions of hugging Pinkie. "Can I borrow Gummy for a bit?"

"Sure!" Pinkie handed the baby alligator to Limestone, who had said reptile latch himself unto her hair like an earring. "What do you need him for?" Pinkie asked."

"Me and Maud are running an experiment and we need Gummy." Limestone said in a defensive tone, which was actually her normal tone.

"Oh, okay." Pinkie plopped back into her seat.

Limestone put her hands on her hips as she eyed Pinkie's system of electronics from the monitors to the switches to the puppet until she finally looked to Pinkie herself. "What'cha got going on here?"

"Well-"

"Short version." Limestone demanded before Pinkie could get started on one of her super detailed descriptions.

"...Oh, right." Pinkie blushed a bit before explaining. "I got this great idea to prank my friends by drugging them with my cupcakes and trapping them in these rooms built to challenge them with silly pranks!"

Limestone raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, they'll be fine." Pinkie assured. "I'm sure they're enjoying it just as much as I am!"

Limestone looked at each monitor screen, each one showcasing one of Pinkie's friends in a small lobby of some sort. Fluttershy was sitting on a little sofa, hugging herself and rocking nervously. Sunset was wringing out her soaked jacket. Rainbow Dash was sitting on her sofa, eating cake batter off of herself. Twilight was pacing back and forth, seeming to be in deep thought. Rarity was laying on her sofa, ranting about how hard it will be to wash ice cream out of her clothes and hair. Applejack was leaning against the wall, looking a bit aggravated.

Limestone looked from the monitors to Pinkie. "They sure don't look like they're enjoying it."

Pinkie looked at the Monitors then back to Limestone. "Don't worry, Limey. This is just one of those things where you don't like it at first, but then, when you look back on it, you realize how much fun you had!" Pinkie gave a confident smile.

Limestone slowly nodded. "Uh-huh... Suppose you don't get the intended reaction?"

"Whadda'ya mean?"

"Hypothetically speaking."

"Oh, Limey, don't be so negative." Pinkie waved off Limestone's concerns. "They'll see the bright side, I'm sure of it."

"Right... Well, if they don't, they're gonna string you up from a tree and I'm not gonna help you. So, for your sake, I hope you're right." With that, Limestone left Pinkie to her devices.

Pinkie smiled and shook her head. "Oh, you'll see, Limestone." She turned to her monitors. "Now, let's get this party moving!"

"I tried to tell her, but she didn't listen." Limestone said as she, Maud, and Marble (Who had decided to join in on the experiment) arranged a collection of rocks on the floor. "I swear, that girl can be as overconfident as that Rainbow chick sometimes."

"I tried to tell her too." Maud added. "Right after she drugged them."

"Hmmm." Marble didn't like the sound of that.

Limestone shrugged. "Ehh, it's not our problem. We tried to warn her, she didn't listen. All there's left to do is wait."

"Are you sure we shouldn't try again?"

Limestone shook her head. "Naw. Besides, if she's right, there's no point to it. And even if she's wrong, this isn't a time to hold her hand. This is a time to let her fall on her butt and learn from it."

"Mmhmm." Marble nodded in agreement.

"Good point." Maud agreed. She fixed the arrangement of the rocks until they were set up perfectly. "Alright, let's see if a baby alligator responds in any way differently to the touch of different types of rocks."

Chicken Run

A startled Fluttershy jumped to her feet when the next door opened. She stood in the middle of the lobby she had been in ever since she escaped from that terrifying Pie Mask and stared at the open doorway. The room on the other side was pitch black, giving the already spooky scenario an even spookier feel.

"P-Pinkie?" Fluttershy questioned.

No answer.

Fluttershy took a deep breath. "Okay, Fluttershy. Keep calm. I mean, this is Pinkie Pie. She wouldn't put you through anything you couldn't handle." She smiled a bit and approached the door. Her smile faded when she stood in the frame and still couldn't see anything. She gulped and forced herself to smile a little as she started taking her first step. "Oh, I'm sure it won't be so ba-AAAAAAAAAD!"

As soon as Fluttershy had taken her first step, she fell forward down a slide; rolling down until she landed in something. Fluttershy opened her eyes, dizzy from her fall, and saw that there was now light. Everything was a blur at first, but she could feel herself being covered in some sort of sticky substance and could smell something sweet. As her vision adjusted, she pulled herself up out of the pool of... "Is this... tree sap?"

Being a nature expert, Fluttershy almost instantly recognized the substance, though why Pinkie just had her slide into a huge puddle of it was beyond her. She got up and examined her sap covered body, not daring to even think about her hair, before walking through and out of the pool. However, right as she reached the end of puddle, her foot snagged a trip wire, causing four cannons to fire simultaneously at the poor girl.

She screamed and flailed around as a swamp of white surrounded her. "AHHHHH-ahh... ahh... Achoo!" She looked over herself and realized what those cannons blasted out: White feathers. To make matters worse, the sap had caused them to stick to her. If that wasn't bad enough, her yellow lips remained clear, giving an impression of a beak.

Still reeling from what had just happened, Fluttershy took notice of the rest of the room. It was small and empty except for a tiny elevator on the wall opposite of her. There was also a sign on the wall that said 'Get In' with an arrow pointing to the elevator. Fluttershy sighed and did as she was told, needing to crouch on her knees to fit inside. On the other side, there sat another TV.

The elevator moved upwards a few feet before stopping. It was then that the TV flashed on, showing the terrifying puppet from earlier. "Welcome to the next stage, Fluttershy."

"Pinkie, I'm sorry, but I really don't like this very much. Can we just stop?" Fluttershy pleaded. "And why am I covered in feathers?"

"Oh, that reminds me. There's something on top of the TV. Take it and put it on your head."

Fluttershy obeyed and grabbed the item atop the TV... which turned out to be a red glove. Fluttershy pursed her lips and gave the TV a bemused look. "Really?"

"You see, Fluttershy, the end is almost in sight, but first, you most get passed this next room. In it, there is a farm of chickens that I, umm, borrowed. The entrance to the final challenge is inside one of the little hen houses. All you have to do is act like a chicken. Seeing as you have a gift with animals, I have full confidence in you."

Fluttershy stretched the red glove onto her head and sighed. "Why do are you doing this, Pinkie?"

"You'll know soon enough. Good luck." The TV turned off and the elevator rose to the next level.

Fluttershy looked through the new entrance to see what was less of a chicken farm and more of a chicken neighborhood. There looked to be a little coup for each chicken; forty in total if she counted correctly, with ten in a row and two alleys. Of course, there were also a bunch of chickens walking around.

Not wanting to disturb them, Fluttershy crawled out and decided to stay on her knees while she looked into each of the coups to find the entrance. At first, she thought to only check the ones that sat against the walls since there was no logical way that the ones against each other would have it, but then she remembered that it's Pinkie's work and decided to check them all.

She slowly made her way through the alley, politely yet nervously greeting each chicken she crossed. "Um, hello, err, um, bok-bok. Bok-bok. Bok to you as well. My, you look bok today. What's bok in the bok, mah chicken? Oh, I wish I could talk with animals." She checked inside each coup for something that would say 'Hey, this is the entrance, Sherlock'. Despite the situation at hand, Fluttershy had to admit that she didn't mind this challenge. "This isn't so bad." She muttered with a smile. "I mean, I get to be with all these sweet little chickens and nothing scary is going on. I don't really mind this."

Meanwhile, stepping out from the other alley was a rooster named Slick Cock. The big bird was patrolling the area same as usual and looked down the alley. His jaw dropped when he beheld the site before him. She was the biggest chicken he had ever seen. Her feathers were so ruffled; so wild. Her wings were so long and solid. He even caught a glimpse of her sparkly blue eyes as she looked into one of the coups. She was... perfect. With a devilish smirk, Slick licked his his wing and slicked back the red thingy on his head before strutting over to this fine piece of work.

"Not here either." Fluttershy muttered as she pulled her head out of another coup. She caught a glimpse to something to her left and turned to face a rooster that was leaning against the coup and giving Fluttershy a strange look. Wait, why was he smiling the way Rainbow Dash smiles when she has a mischievous idea? Wait, why was he wiggling his eyebrows? Wait, why did he remind Fluttershy of a boy she met once? All these questions circled Fluttershy's head as she jumped back in surprise. "Oh, umm, hello, Mr. Rooster. Uhh, I mean, bok-bok."

Slick slowly stepped closer to Fluttershy in a way that reminded her of how her brother, Zephyr, would strut over to girls he liked... Well, until he got kicked in the crotch for his trouble.

Fluttershy backed away with each step the rooster took, starting to become uncomfortable. "Umm, sorry for disrupting your rounds. I'll just go. Bok-bok." With that, Fluttershy moved as fast as her knees could carry her to the other alley, only to come face to face with the same rooster. "Umm, hello again."

Slick brought out a bouquet of flowers out of nowhere and handed, err, winged it to Fluttershy.

Fluttershy took the gift, feeling very confused and somewhat afraid. "Oh, umm, thank you."

Slick picked a flower out of the bouquet and stuck it in his mouth, err, peak and stroke a pose as the entire room went black except for a spotlight on him and another on Fluttershy.

Fluttershy's eyes widened as she tried to comprehend what was happening.

Familiar sounding music started playing as Slick folded his wings in a mouth position, opening and closing them four times. He then flapped his wings four times and shook his tail four more before stomping the ground four times.

Wait a minute... It was the Chicken Dance. Fluttershy hadn't danced that since first grade. However, seeing as the rooster was motioning for her to go, she dropped the bouquet and started doing the dance. She held her hands in a mouth position, opening and closing them four times. She then made wings with her arms and flapped them four times, shook her rear four times, and clapped four times. It was like riding a bike.

Slick then went through his routine again and had Fluttershy do hers again before spreading his wings and spinning in a circle.

Remembering the bridging part, Fluttershy held out her arms and spun in a circle was well, which was harder to do on her knees.

However, as the bridging part came to a close and the lights came back on, Slick caught Fluttershy mid spin and held her close with his wings. Despite not having lips, the rooster puckered up and leaned in for a kiss.

Fluttershy, now truly terrified, pressed her hands against the rooster's chest and leaned back away from the rooster's kiss. "Ehhh, I'm not that kind of girl, err, chicken, err, thing!" She cried out before hopping to her feet and running away to... Well, back to the other alley.

Slick, having been accidentally knocked back, stood back up thought about how strangely long that chicken's legs were. So nice and long.

Fluttershy, not wanting that rooster to find her, crawled into one of the coups and stuffed herself inside. "Oh, Pinkie, why did you have to put an amorous rooster in here?!" She whispered to herself. However, her concentration was broken by what sounded like an 'ahem' if it were coming from a chicken. Fluttershy turned to find that she was squished up against a very annoyed chicken. "Oh, pardon me- Ahh!" Fluttershy was just finishing the sentence when the bird literally kicked her out of the coup and onto her back.

She sat up to find the rooster right beside her, causing her to yelp and back away, only for the rooster to keep advancing towards her. "Look, umm, I'm sure you're a very nice bird and I just know that any of these chickens would be lucky to have you, but I'm afraid I'm just not the one for you."

Unfortunately, her pleas fell on deaf ears as Slick continued to strut over to her; smirk on his face, eyebrow raised, and bobbing his head from side to side like he was the coolest kid on the block.

Desperate, Fluttershy quickly got up and leaped over the wall of coups to the other alley, landing with a thud. She then crawled over to the coup in front of her and poked her head inside to see if she could hide in there. She gasped when she saw a black curtain instead of a wooden wall inside the coup. The entrance.

Not wasting another second, Fluttershy crawled in and pushed through the curtain, finding herself in a dark hallway. She scrambled to her feet and dusted herself off, which was rather pointless since she was still covered in feathers and sap. She then looked to the end of the hall to see a chair in front of what looked to be a window. With a groan, she walked over to the chair and saw that there were actually three windows; one directly in front of the chair and two that branched to each side, giving a view of the left and the right. However, it was too dark to see anything.

Seeing as there was nothing else to do, Fluttershy sighed and sat down.

Rurp.

Fluttershy blushed as she got up and turned to see a whoopie cushion. With a look she usually reserved for her brother, Fluttershy tossed the darned thing to the side and sat back down.