Culture shock

by Thatguywiththeface

Rating: mature
Tags: Princess Celestia, Human, Main 6, Princess Luna, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe
Length: 27487

A roughneck construction worker gets sent to Equestria.

John was having a fairly good day at work, but a freak accident sent him to a strange land and turned his world upside down. Now he has to learn to fit in a whole new culture, and share some of his, because he might not be able to go back home.
Rated mature for language.
Special thanks to Lumox6 for proofreading for me.

Published 2017-06-20 16:20:10 UTC
Last updated 2017-09-04 06:47:44 UTC

Starting over

Drip.
Drip.
Drip.
Drip.
Damn it's cold here...

Maybe picking a fight with anything that moved wasn't such a good idea. I found myself in what could best be described as a dungeon, complete with chains, dripping water and rats competing with each other and the prisoners for food. I've been down here for maybe a week, chained to the wall, contemplating what's next.

Footsteps coming down the passage grab my attention. I haven't seen anyone since I woke up, and I'd like to set things right.

"John."

Not a question, more of an observation, like I was being studied. I look up, and see the same horse? that captured me before I ended up here. Now that things are under a little less pressure, I take the time to have a good look, and maybe take a different approach to things.

"How can I help you?" I don't want to beg, no one deserves to have to do that, but I'll play nice this time around. People tend to be a little cross after getting beat on, and I'd prefer to not have a repeat performance.

"You can start with explaining why you assaulted your doctor, two orderlies, destroyed hospital property and attempted assaulting me." Judging by the stern, feminine sounding voice, I'm gonna say it's a she, and she is pissed. And wearing a crown apparently. This is gonna suck for awhile.

"To be honest ma'am, I'm very freaked out by the circumstances that I find myself in, from when I woke up immediately after my crash, all the way to now. I'm sorry that I assaulted the doctor, but I couldn't help but feel threatened."

I pause for a second, trying to gauge her reaction. Nadda.

"I've never encountered... Magic before, nor talking horses and-"

A vaguely horse-like snort stops me short, and her annoyed glare makes me realize I'm doing nothing more than digging myself into a hole. I stop, wondering how many years aggravated assault would fetch me on another planet. Not to mention trying to assault their queen. God I'm boned.

"It appears as though we're not seeing eye to eye here." She says. Her look turns hard, and I can feel a very explicit warning. "I can understand being thrust into a strange world, and reacting to defend yourself, but know this: I will not tolerate violence against my ponies. You will make this right. Do you wish to do so? Or would you rather spend what few days you would otherwise have left chained to the wall?"

Well, I can't say I was expecting that. "Ma'am,-"

"Princess."

"Sorry, Princess. Yes, I would rather make things right with you. How do I go about that?"

"Come with me."

After a really long walk, surrounded by spear wielding horses, I find myself in an elegant chamber. They didn't shackle me, but the magic fields around my wrists and ankles still made anything more than an awkward shuffle impossible. The entire trip was punctuated with looks ranging from morbid curiosity to disgust coming from anyone we passed. For her part, the Princess remained silent, almost serene. Must be fairly easy for her, trying anything at this point would result in a John-kebab, and I'm a man of my word. I'll behave.

She sits down, doglike (Horses can sit like that?) and regards me, thinking.

"Can I trust you to behave if I remove your binds and dismiss the guards?"

"Yes Princess."

She nods, and the guards file out. I'm able to move freely again, and I take the opportunity to rub my wrists and get the blood flowing in my legs again. Some feelings you just don't forget...

She studies me more, and I begin to get nervous again. I don't see a judge, or any means of execution, but I'm sure she's more than capable of... handling things on her own.

"What are you? Are you a new kind of Changeling?"

"Excuse me? I've never heard of a... Changeling. If you're asking for my species, I'm a human." I recap the events leading up to my involuntary placing here, and her expression slowly starts to go from stern, to soft, to curious.

"I wonder.... Could he be up to some wierd prank again...." She pulls out a scroll and feather pen, and starts writing. At this point, I'm starting to have questions of my own. I watch as she finishes writing, and then seal the scroll. I was starting to feel like I was in the medieval times, everything is so old fashioned here. Up until her horn lights up, and the scroll disappears in a burst of green flame.

"Can I ask something?" I gotta figure something out. She simply nods.

"Where am I?"

"You're in the city of Canterlot, capitol of Equestria. This is my personal meeting Chambers, in the Royal Palace, where myself and my sister rule." Just as she finishes answering, out of nowhere a blinding purple flash appears right next to me, where a small purple horse, with wings and a horn like this white one, appears. Bags stuffed beyond capacity slung over her back, her expression is a strange mix of overwhelming excitement and worry.

"OhmygoshCelestiawhat'sgoingonIjustgotyourletterwhat'sahumanI'veneverheardofthemisithereisitdangerousshouldIgettheotherElements-"

"Twilight, calm down, it's right here. it?

"Princess, I'm actually called a he." It's at this point that the purple one, apparently named Twilight, looks at me, bug-eyed. She freezes for a moment, and slowly approaches. She gets within a few feet, wrinkles her nose, and visibly recoils.

"You stink."

"Well, I just spent a week chained to a wall, sorry." I extend my hand, intending to shake, and promptly found it, and myself pinned to the floor in a magenta haze.

"YOU DARE RAISE YOUR HOOF TO ME! Holy fucking shitbisquits she's loud when she screams. My ears are ringing like church bells, and possibly bleeding, I can't be sure.

"No! Where I'm from we shake hands when we greet each other, it's a sign of respect and friendship, I swear!"
At the mention of friendship, the magenta haze around me fades.
I'm still on the floor, dazed and checking my ears for blood. I don't feel any, but I'm sure there's some permanent damage in there somewhere.

"Twilight, please don't use the Royal Canterlot Voice in here." She almost sounds... Amused.

"Sorry Celestia."

"Is that your name Princess? Celestia?"

She nods, then motions towards the purple ball of neurotic energy next to me.

"Yes. And this is Princess Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship." Did I hear that right?

"Is this the sister you were referring to earlier?"

"No, that would be my sister Princess Luna. There are a total of four Princesses at the moment, the fourth lives in the Crystal Empire."

"So who's the King, or Queen here?"

"We don't have Kings and Queens here, they all end up being evil. Perhaps maybe we should go back to figuring out what to do with your disposition."

Ok, Princess, and I'm assuming Prince, good. King and Queen, bad. Check.

"Sure."

"I summoned Twilight here because it seems it would be most beneficial to us all if we took a civil approach to our new situation, agreed?"

Nods. Pausing for breath, she pours herself some tea.

"As such, it is painfully obvious that there is a large difference between our two worlds. From what I gather, you're not even from this planet. I propose that the two of you work together in coming to an understanding of each other's worlds, customs, and history, so that in the likely event that this happens again, we don't have a repeat of last week. Agreed?"

More nods. Civil is nice.

"Your incident at the hospital notwithstanding, you appear to have good intentions. If Twilight is willing, I would like to send you to Ponyville to begin your work. You will stay in the her castle, under house arrest until we can figure out where to go from there. I will have a squad of guards there as a safety measure, but if you maintain a civil manner, I will call them back. Would that be possible Twilight?"

"Yes, I can accommodate that."

"Very well then. While John is staying with you, the only ponies that can know of his existence are the other Elements, Spike Starlight and Sunset. Sunset's knowledge of her dimension may prove helpful. Have you heard anything from Discord?" She summons a book and starts flipping through it.

"No, I haven't. Do you think this is his doing?"

Man, they got some wierd ass names here. I gotta figure out where they get this from.

"It's a strong possibility, the magic that brought him here resembles his magic. If he isn't behind this, maybe he can provide some insight. Have Fluttershy and Applejack talk to him. If there are no further questions, you should get started. Is there anything you would like to input John?"

"No, I'm sure that Twilight can bring me up to speed."

"Very well. Twilight, John, I wish you the best of luck."

Risking more ear damage, I cautiously extend my hand to Celestia, who after an understandable hesitation, extends her own, and we shake. Twilight looks on, curiosity getting the better of her, before she bows to Celestia.

"Are you ready? We're going to teleport back to my castle. It may be a little... wierd."

"Yea."

She steps closer, and her horn lights up, and seconds later, everything turns white. Well, at least it didn't turn black again.

Moving in

bzzzzzt CRACK

Back to reality. Oh for fuck's sake let's not teleport again. Ever. I try my best to not empty my stomach all over the place, but it's just not working out. I look at the cause of my torment, and at that point, projectile vomit all over her. Her eyes constrict, her left one twitching, and she visibly recoils back, one foreleg held up. I may not have intended for her to get hosed down in such a manner, but well, karma's a bitch sometimes.

"Sorry about that." I'm expecting to be kicked, or lit on fire, or something, but she vanishes again, leaving me alone.

"Who are you?"

I look down, and there's this little purple dude, with green spikes looking up at me. He kinda looks like the lizards they sell at the pet store, only this one's about the size of a toddler. Do all the animals here talk?

"Uh, I'm John. Twilight Sparkle brought me here. She went out for a second after I puked on her. I think she's trying to rinse off. You don't seem too surprised to see me."

"Well, with all the company that Twilight brings in, I see lots of interesting things. Wait till you see the griffons, or a Minotaur. I'm Spike by the way. Twilight adopted me when I was a hatchling."

I'm starting to like this little guy. He pulls out what looks like a ruby, and starts chewing it like it's a hard candy.

"Sorry if this sounds rude, but what are you? I've never seen anything that can eat rocks like they're nothing more than candy. You look like the biggest lizard I've ever seen."

"I'm actually a baby dragon, gemstones is the biggest part of my diet, aside from meat on occasion."

"So some of you do eat meat. I was starting to think I'd have to go vegetarian. Who else eats meat here?"

"Griffons, Minotaurs, even pegasi, unicorns and alicorns eat meat, though they prefer to stick with fish. It helps with their magic. The only true vegetarians are earth ponies."

With a flash and crackle, Twilight reappears, looking irritated, but clean.

"Next time you decide you need to vomit, please aim it in a safe direction. I'll return the favor by doing the same with my horn. Now, if you'll follow me, I will show you to your chambers. I know you don't have anything, but we did manage to save that metal box you came in, along with everything that was in it. Maybe we could start our work there, and you can show me some of the things you brought with you."

This brightens my mood considerably. I've got a case of beer and a carton of smokes screaming my name. Priorities.

"Is there any way we could go there real quick once I'm settled in? I have a few things I'd like to pick up tonight."

She nods before stopping in front of an elegant crystal door, already flanked by a single guard. He stands up straight, greeting the princess before opening the door for her.

"This is your chambers. There will be a guard present at all times for the time being. You are free to roam the castle as you see fit, but will be under escort at all times. The only areas you are forbidden to be in are my personal chambers and the restricted areas of the library unless given my explicit permission. These restrictions can be lifted as long as you don't misbehave. For now, please aquaint yourself with your chambers, and then head to the dining hall for lunch. We will tend to your personal effects after."
With that, she disappears in a flash of purple light, leaving me with the guard and Spike.

"What the did you do to end up under house arrest?" He asks.

"Well, after my arrival, I woke up in the hospital, and kinda freaked out at all the talking horses. So I fought back, assaulted the doctor and a couple orderlies, and ended up getting captured by Princess Celestia. I then spent a week in the slammer before coming here, under the condition that I remain well behaved."

"What's a slammer?"

"Jail."

"You're not going to hurt me are you?"

I look down, and see Spike curled in on himself, ready to bolt should I attack.

"Look kid, I might be a bit ragged around the edges, and not afraid of a fight, but I'm not really the type to go looking for trouble. I don't like the idea of making people afraid of me."

"Ok. Why'd you call me kid though? My name's Spike."

"Mostly because you're a baby dragon. When we talk to people that are fairly young, we sometimes call them kid. It means young person. I don't have anything to do in here, so maybe we should go grab lunch. I'm starving."

Lunch was a simple meal, some sort of vegetable soup, with some fish served on the side. Twilight was obviously surprised that I didn't mind meat being served, and immediately started asking questions.

"So, you eat meat too. I had a feeling that you did when I noticed you had canines, but I couldn't be sure."

"Yea, meat is a large part of human diet. We don't just eat fish though, we will eat just about anything. Where I'm from it's usually pork, beef or chicken. Spike told me you only eat fish, and just to help with your magic."

She looks slightly horrified that I'll eat other animals, I'm wondering if other barn animals around here talk too. That would be wierd as fuck. I'm suddenly flooded with the mental image of cows protesting burgers, and I can't help but chuckle.

After our meal, Twilight takes me to the outside of the castle, where I find a familiar looking rust bucket, with a significantly more compact front end.

"Wow, I really nailed the fuck outta that tree."

"What is this thing?"

"It's a truck, we use these and other similar vehicles to get around. We don't really go everywhere on foot or teleport like you can." I try pulling the door open, but it's jammed shut, so I reach into the toolbox in the bed, pull out a prybar and start working the door loose until it pops out. To my eternal surprise, I find that despite being jostled some, most everything is still intact. Twilight moves in closer, obviously curious.

"This is where you sit? What do you do to make it move?"

"Yea, all the controls are right here in the driver's seat." Pointing out the various controls, she begins to make connections in her head.

"So what actually makes it move?"

I sigh, and begin explaining as best I can the principle behind internal combustion engines, prying open the engine compartment and showing her what's left of it. At this point, I find my beer and smokes, and go into full redneck mode. Twilight looks at me wierd, and sees the obvious joy on my face as I pound the first drink, and crack a second.

"You know, we do have water if you're thirsty."

"My dear Twilight, this is no ordinary drink. This, is beer. It is meant to be drank in this fashion, but should be cold. However, at this point, I'll take alcohol in any form."

"I've never heard of beer. What's so special about it?"

"Well, it tastes good, and it makes you feel good. Just don't drink too much of it, or you start making really bad decisions, like deciding to drive a car, or fucking that really good looking lady at the bar that's actually not all that good looking, or in your case, guy."

Two beers down, and I'm starting to feel a little happier, and I pull out a pack of cigarettes. By this time Twilight is in full scholar mode, writing down everything I do and say. She doesn't seem to have a clue what profanity is, and I'm just waiting for her to ask what I mean by fucking a random chick at the bar. Oh that's gonna be funny.

"Hey Spike, can you breath fire?"

"Yea, why?"

"Can you shoot a little bit of it right on the end of this white stick I got here?"

I put the cigarette to my lips, and wait for him to shoot. Twilight gets a panicked look, and before she can say anything, he shoots a jet of fire at my face. I pull back, patting at my beard, and realize, my cigarette is gone!

"What the fuck? Where'd it go?"

"When Spike burns something with his fire, it doesn't stay, it gets sent to Princess Celestia, it's how we do our mail. Whatever that was, it's now sitting in front of her."

Oh shit, looks like we're gonna be getting no smoking laws passed pretty quick. I can't help but laugh at the image of Celestia holding a burning cigarette, wondering what the hell we're up to.

"What's so funny, and what was that?"

I stop laughing long enough to pull out another, and light it with a lighter I find on the floor boards.

"Where I'm from, some of us smoke a plant called 'tobacco'. It's kinda frowned upon, and seen as a lower class activity." I notice she's staring at the lit cigarette, and her face is a mixture of shock, and wonder.

"Why would you light something on fire, and then inhale the smoke like that? Doesn't that hurt?"

"No, not really. They're actually extremely addictive, and I wouldn't recommend you pick up the habit."

I go to crack open another beer, and Twilight looks at the case, almost looking a little... Thirsty?

"Can I try one of those beers?"

Oh, this is gonna be hilarious. I open it for her, and she takes a delicate sip, before pausing. She puts it down, and starts writing notes.

"Bitter tasting, but not like tea, I can almost taste some sort of grain in it, but I'm not sure what. I'm not sure why it's so fizzy. It tastes ok, I'll keep drinking it." She takes a long pull, and I sit back, waiting for the show to start.

"Sho, what elshe ij in your, thingy?"
She walks over to the other side, having a slight wobble to her steps. Boy she's a lightweight. At least I don't have to worry about her drinking my whole case. I can brew my own, but that takes awhile, and I want what little I have to last. She drains the bottle, and notices another bottle, and pulls it out. Uncorking it, she sniffs, before I take it from her magic.

"Nope, that's not beer, that's Irish whiskey, let's save that for another time."

"Whishkey? Is that kinda like beer?"

"No, it's stronger. And I'm not gonna have you mixing your drinks when you can barely handle one beer." I can already see her starting to lose control, and now I'm starting to worry that she'll get sick.

"Hey John, what's this?" I look up, and with horror, I realize that Spike has found the worst possible thing for one of these people to find. My pistol.

"Ok, put that down, please, now, don't touch anything on it, I really don't wanna have to explain-"

POW.

"FUCK! SHIT THAT BURNS!" I sit down quickly, looking at my shoulder, hoping to God that it didn't hit a bone. Blood is pouring out fairly quickly. Taking off my shirt, I shove it into the hole as best I can. Spike runs over, scared shitless thinking he just killed me.

"What was that?! What do I do?! Are you ok?! Should I-"

"Get me to a hospital. Then we'll go from there."

Author's Note

Sorry for the darkish ending to the chapter, but I couldn't help but think that Spike accidentally putting a bullet in John's shoulder would be kinda funny. I would also like to thank Lumox6 for proofreading for me.

Probation hearing

True to her word, as soon as breakfast was over, we went out into the courtyard to board a chariot bound for Canterlot. "What, you don't wanna teleport us there Twilight?"
Glaring, she snaps at me a little. "If you would prefer, I can have Spike send you with his Dragonfire. It would certainly be faster."

"Jesus Twilight, who the fuck shit in your Cheerios?" I ask, kinda miffed. "Not a morning pony are you?" I hear her grumble under her breath, something about talking to others before coffee, and how it should be punishable by public gelding.
"Hey Spike," I whisper, "how hard would it be for you to send me to Canterlot with your fire?"

"Not hard at all." He casually says. "Though it would probably hurt like crazy. Don't mind Twilight, you're right, she's not a morning pony at all, once her coffee kicks in, she'll be back to normal. Or somewhat neurotic. You never know sometimes. She lives on coffee, the only one I've seen rival her in coffee intake is you."

"Yea," I grin at him, "but when she drinks too much of it is when she gets neurotic. I don't have that problem."
Twlight sticks her head out the window of the chariot. "GET YOUR ASSES IN THE CHARIOT NOW!"

It's only been 15 minutes into the ride, and Twilight is already starting to get a little neurotic.

"Spike, did you pack plenty of scrolls?"

"Yes Twilight."

"What about quills and ink? I don't want to have to borrow any from Celestia."

"Yes Twilight. We have all the things that you need."

"What do you think she wants to talk to us about? I hope that she's not angry about what happened the other day. What if she puts John on trial? What if she throws him back into the dungeon? What if-"

"Twilight." I interject. "Calm down. For one, if Princess Celestia wanted me in jail, it would be just the two of you in this chariot right now. She's probably more curious about my weapon than the actual accident itself." I lean back, pop open a window and light a cigarette.

"I'm sure that Princess Celestia has enough faith in you to know that you can handle things on your own. She did make you a Princess right?"

She looks off into the distance, a fond look on her face. "Yea. She ascended me into an alicorn herself. But what if she decides I failed?! What if she changes me back to a unicorn?!"

I roll my eyes at her. "You need a vacation. Might I recommend Hawaii?"

"Princess! Is everything ok in there? We can smell smoke!"

"Yes, everything is ok, just someone decided to light one of those ciggert things in here." She glares at me.

"Sorry." I flick it out the window. "Say, how much coffee did you drink before we left?"

"Two cups, why?"

I snicker and look at Spike.

"Amateur."

"Princesses Celestia and Luna will see you now."

A stuffy looking unicorn with a white coat and golden mane brings us to Celestia's chambers. Even being only four feet tall, he still manages to make me feel like he's looking down on me. "How is Rarity faring lately?"

"Buzz off Blueblood." Twilight says flatly, not even bothering to look at him. Can't really blame her there with his attitude. He looks up at me, disdain clear on his face. I look at him flatly.

"So uncivilized."

"Listen fuckface, Twilight doesn't like you. Because of that, and your personality in general, I dont like you. So fuck off." Spike trys to hold in a snicker, but fails.

"It's Prince Blueblood to you."

And I thought decaffeinated Twilight was grumpy.

Entering Celestia's chambers, I bow to her, noting that she has a midnight blue alicorn sitting next to her.

"Good morning Princess."

"John, it's nice to see you again. How are things going so far?"

I look at Twilight, thinking of the last few days. "They've been quite... interesting."

"Yes, we hear that they have been." The blue alicorn speaks. While Celestia has a warm, almost motherly tone to her voice, this one sounds more regal, serene. Her face seems like she is more curious, and she approaches me, wanting to take a closer look.

"We are Princess Luna, Princess of the night. Thou does not see us in the waking realm often, but thou may often see us in thy dreams. Our sister takes care of our ponies in the day, while we guard them in their dreams in the night."
While speaking in this odd manner, she is walking around me, studying me. I can't quite figure out her speech, and it must be clear on my face.

"Art thou confused by the Royal We?"

"Uh, yes Princess, I'm not sure why you refer to yourself as if you are a group of ponies."

"It is an old manner of speaking, one that hasn't been used for almost a thousand years." She chuckles. "Not too long ago, we were still in the habit of using the Royal Canterlot Voice. We had trouble speaking with the citizens of Equestria because of that."

"Is that the really loud voice that almost makes your ears bleed?"

"Yes, 'tis indeed." She chuckles, blushing. She smiles at me, and returns to her seat.
"Please, sit and have tea with us."

"Do you have any coffee?" Out of nowhere a new pot appears on the table. I pour myself a cup. Twilight reaches for the pot, but I pull it from her. "No coffee for you, you're neurotic enough as it is right now."

The look on Twilight's face is priceless. "I AM NOT NEUROTIC! Just because I was super nervous about how this meeting was going to go and didn't want to see you thrown in jail because you got shot in the shoulder with your own gun and had a weapon I'm Equestria and got me drunk and accidentally-"

"I prove my point." Twilight glares at me, but I simply grin back. She takes a cup of tea instead.

"So, first things first. What was that food you sent last night? It was quite good in all honesty."

I grin, explaining what little I know about Italian food, and the basic recipe for pizza. I'm getting curious about what kind of toppings I'm gonna see on pizza now.

"Yes, but thou should have sent more, we did not get to have any of it, and we are disappointed about it."

The mood starts to grow somber however, and I'm sure I know why.

"Twilight told me about what happened two days ago."

Well, can't say I'm surprised that this came up. Twilight looks nervous, fidgeting with her teacup more than anything.

"Yes, there was an... accident involving a weapon I had in my truck. Spike found it, and not knowing what it was, accidentally shot me." I say as honestly as I can. "I'm not holding any grudges, and Twilight and I have agreed that for the time being it would be best to keep the weapon in her custody. It led to some... interesting conversation."

The sisters share a look of concern. "Interesting in what manner?"

"I explained to her my species' tendency for war. There seems to be little conflict here, at least on the surface. That isn't the case in my world, a planet we call Earth. We fight openly, with little shame. Yet despite that, there are people who are like you, who only strive for peaceful coexistence with others. I promised Twilight that I would never allow the hatred and violence from Earth to spill over here."

They both look relieved, but now curious. "Thou speak of this as though you are familiar, yes?"

I nod, not sure how to explain. "Before I came here, a few years ago, I was a part of that. I was a soldier for my country, and had been to war. It is a horrible thing to experience. That is a part of my past now, and I would prefer to keep it that way."

"Thou were a soldier once?" Luna asks.

"Yes." I say proudly. "While the experience of war is horrible in itself, I am proud of my service to my country. Because of it, I have a brotherhood with all other servicemembers, no matter what capacity they served in. They are like family to me."

They nod, respecting my viewpoint. "And what of us?" Celestia asks. "We are peaceful, but we have had war in the past. If war were to come to Equestria, would you help to defend her?"

"I would Princess. You have been kind to me, and I wouldn't turn my back on you simply because I don't want to go back to being a soldier. My own honor would not allow it."

"That is good to know. I'm sure you're aware, but there is more to this meeting than just discussing your accident, and war. We are also here to discuss how relations with Princess Twilight are going. From what she has told us in her reports, it seems that you're not as much of a threat as we originally thought." Celestia pauses, taking a sip of tea. "Your doctor, Bedside Manner even put in a good word for you. With this in mind, we have decided to lift your house arrest. From this moment on, you are free to go as you please, and meet the rest of Equestria's populace."

"Thank you Princess, for trusting in me. I am looking forward to seeing the rest of Ponyville. I just hope that my novelty doesn't prove too much for everyone."

"You're welcome John." Celestia smiles warmly at me. "You will find that outside of Canterlot, ponies are very friendly, even to complete strangers."

"Our other order of business is whether thou wishes to remain in Equestria." Luna states.

"Well Princess, I haven't really thought about that." I sit back, thinking about whether I really would want to stay here. It's a nice place to live, kinda like home, but more laid back. "I'm not sure how to answer that Princess. With everything going on, I haven't had a chance to think about it. I know that I will have many friends here, and a good life. But one thing I haven't done yet is settle down with someone, and start a family. I don't see any other humans here, and I wouldn't want to bring someone here against their will." They look thoughtful, and Celestia speaks to me.

"We haven't found how you came to arrive here yet. Two of Twilight's friends have gone in search of answers, but I haven't heard anything yet myself." She looks to Twilight. "Twilight, has Applejack and Fluttershy returned from seeing Discord yet?"

"Speaking of the devil" a sly, jovial voice sounds from seemingly nowhere. A cloud of smoke forms into this... thing. What the everloving fuck is that thing?

"Who in the fuck are you?" I stand up, instinctively putting myself between it and Twilight.

"Tsk tsk." He chuckles. "Naughty human, using such dirty language in front of the Princesses. Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" He floats into the air, laying in a hammock, upside down, sipping a drink and wearing sunglasses. "I presume you must be John." He makes a toilet appear, flushing it before it winks out of existence again.

"And you are...?" I ask. Until I determine this thing isn't a threat, I'm not budging from being in front of Twilight. The sisters are quite powerful, but something makes me want to protect Twilight from harm. Despite this, she sidesteps me, and tries to defuse things.

"This is Discord. The one we think might have brought you here."

"Me?" He sits up, feigning offense. "No, this little trick is not mine. I may do many things. But bringing anyone, pony or otherwise, into a potentially harmful situation is not my style. I prefer the fun chaos." With that, he snaps his fingers, and pink rain clouds appear above us, raining chocolate milk.

"If thou hast no part in this, perhaps thou would tell us how this might have come to pass?" Luna asks, soaked in chocolate milk. "And if it pleases thou, dispatch the clouds from our presence. We do not like getting soaked in chocolate milk."

"Oh Loony, you're no fun." He snaps his fingers again, and the rain stops. He pulls a cloud down and starts eating it. "It is an old trick though."

"As for your guest here, I may have had no part in it, but I can point you in a direction. He pulls a spinner arrow out of a bag and flicks it with his tail. As it spins, he continues his monologue. " About 3 weeks ago, I felt a surge of power. It was more powerful than anything I've felt in recent memory. Out of pure curiosity, I set out to investigate." He looks at me with a serious face. "You wouldn't believe what I found."

"It wasn't Tirek, or Sombra again was it?"

"No, quite the opposite actually. Deep in the White Tail Woods, I found....."

All four of us are now practically falling forward we're leaning so far in.

"Silly, if I told you, that would ruin the surprise now wouldn't it?" He looks down, pointing at the arrow. It stopped while he was speaking, now pointing roughly Southwest. "This arrow will help you find the answers that you seek. You will be pleasantly surprised by what you find I'm sure." He shrinks it down until it's the size of a phone, giving it to me. "Alas, I cannot give you any more answers. Arrivederci!" With that final word, he disappears in a cloud of fireworks.

"Does he normally give wierd, mysterious answers like that?" I ask sardonically, looking at Twilight.

"Oh, you have no idea." She answers. "Celestia, John and I will go into the White Tail Woods and investigate. Hopefully the answers really are there and this isn't another one of Discord's puzzles." She looks at me, new questions in her eyes. "Maybe then we can start to make sense of what's going on here."

The answers you seek.

We had been walking through the White Tail Woods for half a day now. Twilight had been able to teleport the two of us to the edge of the woods, but beyond that, we had to hoof it, following Discord's compass as best as we could. Harkening back to my days in the Army, I had plotted a course on a map, triangulating the rough location of where the compass wanted us to go.

"So, you're sure that whatever it is we're looking for is in the middle of this valley?" Twilight asks, no small amount of doubt in her voice.

"Yea, you've never heard of triangulating?" She shakes her head, looking to me for further explanation. Well, this is as good a place as any to stop for a break, so I guess I'll explain over lunch. Sitting down, we break out some food and I spread the map out on the ground, showing the woods in their entirety.

"This point is where we started from when we arrived," I point at the edge of the woods. "Luckily it was at a known landmark. Once we had determined that location, I plotted the direction Discord's compass was pointing in relative to North. When we arrived at these falls here, I repeated the process, giving me these two vectors on the map." I point at the two arrows I had drawn. "I drew them out until they intersected, and that will be the approximate location of our destination, within hopefully about an acre or so of woods." She understands now. Good thing for land navigation courses. Finishing our quick meal, we head out again. Twilight still has a somewhat concerned look on her face, and I can't help but ask what's bothering her.

"How come you asked to bring your weapons along?" She asks, eyeing my pistol in it's leg holster, along with my AR15 that I had taken from a box in my truck. "And how come you didn't tell me about the second one? We can't keep secrets from each other, especially ones of THIS nature." Now she sounds fearful. "Judging from the fact that it's bigger than your pistol, I'm guessing it's more powerful. You even mentioned that it's similar to what your military uses. I can't stress how nervous this makes me."

I stop, kneeling down in front of her, looking into her large, violet eyes. "Twilight, I would not bring this along to harm you or anything else that means no harm to us. I don't know what to expect here, and I don't want to be unprepared. I hope that I do not have to use these." She sits down, looking worried, and slightly offended.

"I'm the Princess of Friendship, and an alicorn. My magic is only surpassed by Celestia and Luna. You don't think that I can take care of myself?"

I look away. She's starting to get close to the real reasons why I'm acting towards her the way I am. Reasons that even I haven't been able to fully understand at the moment. I look back into her eyes.

"I'm sure that you can Twilight. I'm sure that you would appreciate the help though. Truth is, I care for you, and I don't want to run the risk of anything happening to you. Perhaps..." I cut off, not ready to go this far. Not yet. "We should keep going. Judging by the map, this trip will take at least 2 days, and I'd like to find a good spot to settle in before nightfall."

She furrows her brow, now genuinely curious. I stand up, and we continue on in tepid silence. Looking around, I notice that the general sounds of the forest seem to have almost died down to nothing, save for the sound of our footsteps. "Twilight, what lives in these woods?"

"Nothing major really. This is nowhere near as bad as the Everfree Forest. But there have been rumors of timberwolves lately."

I look down at her. "And what exactly are those? Where I'm from, wolves are like dogs, just bigger, and wild. In fact, dogs are descended from wolves, from when we domesticated them thousands of years ago. The biggest difference is that while most dogs won't attack you, wolves are much more likely to do so, and turn you into a meal."

"Yea... About that..."

And you said I didn't need a weapon. I think to myself. This silence is starting to get unnerving, and I start swiveling around, checking behind us.

Twilight notices this. "What's going on? I dont hear anything."

"No offense, but you don't have combat experience. I've learned that if you get a funny feeling about something, it's most likely true. And right now, I have a funny feeling that something is following us."

I start seeing movement, about 10 yards to the side of the trail to our left. I don't see anything that looks like a wolf, but something big is disturbing the underbrush. I check the other side of the trail, and I'm seeing the same thing.

"We're not alone, Twilight." Flicking the safety on my rifle off, I take aim. "This is typical pack hunting activity. Whatever is out there is surrounding us."

I look back at her, and surprisingly Twilight is crouched low, charging her horn. "I'll cover the right side John, you take the left."
She pauses and looks at me, a sarcastic grin on her face. "Please don't shoot me on accident."

I look back, and notice what looks like a loose pile of firewood that wasn't there before. It starts to move towards me, letting out a low growl. What the fuck.

"Contact!" I yell, and the boom of my rifle sounds out, echoing off the surrounding trees. I hear a strange zap next to me, and I look over at Twilight, who has started shooting magic at the opposite side of the trail, bolts of angry red energy splashing off the foliage, burning it to a crisp. I return to engaging my own set of targets, though the smaller projectiles don't seem to do much besides piss the creatures off. Aiming for their faces, I unleash quick bursts of fire, trying to disorient or even blind them.

After a few minutes of this, the creatures on my side start to fall back, not liking the noise from my rifle, smarting from the bullets chipping away at their heads. With a final burst, they go into a full retreat, and all is quiet again. Taking advantage of the break, I reload a fresh magazine. I back up and put a hand on Twilight, who's now shaking slightly.

"Are you ok?" I ask.

"Yea, I'll be fine." She murmured, sitting down. I look at her side of the trail, and see the destruction she unleashed.

"Holy shit Twilight. I didn't know you could do that. I guess you weren't exaggerating when you said you could take care of yourself."

"Yea." She chuckles in a low tone. "Told ya so."

The threat gone, I re-engage the safety on my weapon and sling it on my back. I turn to Twilight and kneeling down, I put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

"Are you really ok Twilight?"

She looks up at me. "Yes. Thank you for asking. And thank you for helping me. I guess you really do care about me huh?" She smiles.

"Yea."

She closes the space between us and nuzzles into my chest. "I'm glad you came along."

A few hours later, it starts to get dark, and we stop for the night, near a ledge overlooking the valley. Just out of curiosity, I pull out Discord's compass. Sure enough, it points straight to the middle.

"Well, looks like we're gonna be going down this ledge tomorrow." I muse out loud, stepping forward to see about figuring out a path down.

"So what now?" Twilight asks beside me.

"We set up camp. We're gonna need firewood for starters."

With a purple flash and a clatter, Twilight pulls together a small pile of firewood.
"Done." She sings out with a toothy grin. I can't help but chuckle at her.

"Well, we have plenty of food, and I have a small tent for you, so let's just get a campfire going."

With a warm fire and dinner mostly finished, Twilight rolls over on her back, and looks up at the night sky.

"It sure is beautiful isn't it John?" She whispers quietly. I look over at her. She's lying back with her forelegs held close to her chest, and in the dim light, her eyes almost had a look of, longing?

I lie backwards myself, not sure what exactly to think. To try and keep from having an awkward silence, I strike up a conversation. "Yea. Back home, in ancient times, people much smarter than myself looked up at the night sky, and saw pictures in the stars. They gave them different names from their myths, and called them constellations. They don't appear here, but if you know what to look for, you'll see them."

I hear a rustle near me, and Twilight settles down beside me. "We have those too," she quietly says. Pointing at the sky with her hoof, she points out a cluster of stars. "That's Starswirl the Bearded right there, and next to him, Clover the Clever and Princess Platinum." She points at another cluster. "There is Commander Hurricane, and Private Pansy, with Chancellor Puddinghead and Smart Cookie."

She's quiet for a minute. Looking over to her, it's obvious that this is important to her. "Starswirl has been a long time idol of mine, and the other six were the founders of Equestria. Equestria is the harmonious nation that it is today thanks to them."

Another pause. "What about your constellations? Do you have any?"

I chuckle to myself. "Sorry Twilight, but I can't really give you too much on that. Astronomy wasn't really anything I got into."

"That's ok, you can't know everything." She whispers. She moves even closer, resting her head on my shoulder. I look at her, and when our eyes lock, I see for a fleeting moment, a spark that I had never seen before. I wrap my arms around her, and someone, somewhere, turns on the autopilot, and our lips connect.

I close my eyes, running my hand through her mane, enveloped in a moment of sheer joy. When our kiss breaks, she smiles and settles down, seemingly content, drifting off to sleep, with me not far behind.

"John, thou art certainly interesting." A serene, yet stern voice states. I sit up, finding myself in a field of tall grass, with Luna approaching.

"Where am I?"

"Thou art in the dream realm, where we stand guard over our ponies while they rest."

She stops before me, her face unreadable. "Thou art very interesting indeed. We first noticed, upon meeting Discord for the first time, thou placed thyself between him and Twilight, even though he was of no threat to her. And today, while we watched over, thou protected her against the timberwolves, and comforted her. Tell us John, why is this?"

I look down, uncertain how to answer. "Honestly, I'm not sure."

She chuckles lightly at me. "Oh, we are sure, that in the deepest part of thine heart, thou knowest exactly why. Thou love her, yes?"

Flushing, I look away. "I wouldn't know what to say to her about it. She's a princess and I'm a professional ass-kicker. Not exactly a match made in heaven."

"Dost thou wish to know how she feels?" She asks, smiling.

"I don't know. I don't want to force the issue with her. I was going to let her say something about it when she's ready."

"Twilight is indeed ready, she just doesn't know it yet." Chuckling, she extends a hoof. "Come with us, thou should see."

After a moment's hesitation, I take her hoof, and with a gentle tug of magic, the world melts away, replaced by a dream of Twilight curled up in my arms, asleep on a cloud.

We both stand there, looking on, before Luna speaks again. "This is her dream right now. She loves thee John."

I move closer, seeing a content smile on Twilight's face. I reach down, and gently caress her mane. "But I'm not a pony."

"We see love in a different way than thou does John. It is still the foundation of a life-long relationship, but we apply it more openly. We don't look at what you are, but who you are. That is the major difference. We cannot tell thee what to do in matters pertaining to the heart. But please, take this into consideration, for she wishes to give thee hers."

With this, she walks away, before looking back. "If thou wishes, we may join your dream with hers. Would thee like to do this?"

Looking down, I nod. "Yes."

With a midnight blue glow, I feel another tug of magic, and I'm lying down on a cloud, with Twilight curled in my arms. I settle down, and let the dream take over again.

Morning comes, and I wake up with Twilight curled up in my arms, resting her head on my shoulder and her hoof on my chest. I pull her in closer, and she stirs, beginning to wake up. I gently kiss her, and she sighs, before opening her eyes. When she realizes where she is, she freezes, wide-eyed.

"Relax Twilight, it's ok." I tell her. Sighing to myself, I sit her up. I guess I'm definitely gonna have to clear the air now. "I guess we should talk."

She sheepishly rubs her head, "I'm not sure how that happened. I uh, dont know what to say."

"Does Luna come to ponies in their dreams?" I ask.

Twilight looks up, surprised. "Yes, actually, she does. That is her primary duty, to watch over our dreams and keep us safe while we sleep. She even gives advice in the dreamscape, where our true desires often manifest." She looks at me cautiously. "What did she tell you?"

"That you love me." I mumble.

"And if it were true?"

Now it's my turn to look up. "Do you?" She nuzzles my neck. I think that's answer enough. "Twilight, I will always give whatever I have to in order to keep you safe. Because I do love you, the only thing that's different now is I've acknowledged it."

Hearing this she smiles and nuzzles me again. "Thank you John." I return the gesture as best I can. I don't have a snout like her, so I end up just awkwardly burying my face in her mane. She titters at this, before moving to stretch out before grabbing some breakfast.

A fresh cup of coffee in hand, I look down to the valley before us, contemplating the mystery within. Twilight nudges against me, seeming to be more confident now that we're more honest with each other.

"You can do a lot with your magic right?"

"What are you asking for?" She gets an uncertain tone. "Even alicorns have limits."

"If I don't go home for whatever reason, I don't want to be the only human in Equestria. I would rather be a citizen of Equestria, body and spirit. I like your world, and I don't think I would mind becoming a permanent part of it." I pause, swirling my coffee around in my mug. "Maybe the best course of action would be to pursue that instead of figuring out how to get me back to my home world. Because I can't help but think that whatever is down there, it has me here for a reason, and it's not going to do any good for me to pack my bags and leave when I'm needed here."

"Are you saying you would rather be a pony?"

"Yea, I think so."

She looks up at me, seemingly happy. "I'll see what can be done for that." I smile back at her, and rub behind her ear. Looking out over the ridge, I swear for a second I saw a midnight blue pony watching over us, smiling, before disappearing in a dark blue flash.

Finally making it to the bottom of the ridge with nothing of concern happening, I pull my map out to see how much longer we have. "Going by the map, we've got about a mile left to go." I look up at the rolling hills ahead of us, sparsely covered in trees. "At least navigating won't be too difficult. I think we could stick with Discord's compass for the remainder of the trip."

"Awesome. Can we take a breather for a bit?" Twilight huffs at me. Remembering the wolves from yesterday, I scan the ridge above us and the surrounding hills. We'll be able to spot anything coming from a mile away, so we have all the space in the world.

"Yea, this looks like a pretty safe spot." I drop my bags and sit on a stump, pulling out a smoke. Even with rationing I'm down to just a few packs. Cold turkey is gonna suck.

"Why do you keep using those? I'm surprised you haven't burnt anything down yet." Twilight quips at me. "Are they that addictive?"

"Yea, they are." I say, taking a drag. "The good news is I'm running low on them, and when I run out, I'm out. Don't bother looking for a substitute, I need to quit anyways. The bad news is when I do run out I'm gonna be fairly cranky for a week or so. Extra coffee might help mitigate that." I chuckle to myself. I hope I can keep my crankiness in check, Twilight doesn't deserve it at all. Twilight comes over and nudges me, ready to keep going.

"Let's keep going. When we get back to the castle, we can spend some more time together, but for now it's really important to get some answers."

I turn to her and kiss her cheek. "Yea, that sounds nice." I stand up and strap my gear on, ready to get some answers myself.

After about another hour of hiking through the hills, Twilight stops again, looking around her. I stop and immediately start scanning for threats with my rifle, but Twilight stands up and puts a hoof on my shoulder, whispering in my ear. "Don't John. There's no danger here. Can you feel what I'm feeling right now?"

I relax a little, and notice there is a strange feeling in the air, almost like static, making the hairs on my arms stand on end. "I feel something, I just don't know what it is. It feels like static electricity on my skin." I look in her eyes. "Is that what magic feels like?"

Twilight steps back down before answering. "Possibly, though I feel it deeper down in my core. You're not a magical being, so the fact that you can feel it too means that either we're approaching something extremely powerful, or tuned in such a way that it can affect you." She jumps back up and nuzzles me. "Please be careful."

When we get to the top of the hill, the magic field gets so powerful that I now feel compelled to continue; I couldn't stop if I wanted to. At the top is a tree, similar to a weeping willow, branches reaching down to the ground and completely shrouding its trunk. It seems to give off a slight glow of it's own, and when Twilight sees it, she gasps in shock. "No way..."

"What are we looking at?"

Twilight sits, and beckons for me to do the same. "Back before I became a Princess, I came to be one of six bearers of what we call the Elements of Harmony. My Element is that of Magic. The others are Honesty, Loyalty, Generosity, Kindness and Laughter, each one represented by my closest friends. They have been instrumental in defending Equestria from great evil. They come from the Tree of Harmony, and are the foundation for my castle. Up until now, the Tree of Harmony has been the only Tree of Power that we knew of, dating back to the founding of Equestria. Some say that the founding ponies were the original bearers of the Elements." She looks up at the tree, awestruck. "I think we found another Tree of Power." She looks at me gravely. "If that's the case, then that means that there is a great evil coming, one that the Elements of Harmony won't be able to defeat. And if you're connected to this tree, than you are a bearer of an Element, and will be instrumental in defeating whatever is coming. We need to go and investigate."

Reaching the edge of the canopy formed by the branches, I hesitate, looking to Twilight. She nods, and I part the branches, stepping through with her close behind me. Near the base of the trunk are six branches with a bulge near where they join the trunk. When I approach, one of the branches starts to move, opening up and revealing a small opening with an object inside.

Looking into the branch, I lift out a small metal shield, dark charcoal grey in color, with crossed swords behind it. Upon seeing it, Twilight whispers, "You're a bearer of an Element."

"As honored as I am to receive this Twilight, it's like you said. This is bad news. Something is coming." I look down at my shield.

"And I need to defeat it."

Guardians of Harmony

Twilight had finally finished analyzing the new tree of power that we had discovered, sitting in a trance-like state for a number of hours as I stood watch.

“So, what’d you gather from it?” I ask, somewhat annoyed at spending the last few hours with little else to do but count the surrounding trees. Despite the fact that the timberwolves had left us alone after our previous encounter, I was still getting an off feeling about this place, and it wasn't just the pervasive magic. It was starting to feel like it was too quiet again.
“From what I can tell, it’s definitely another tree of power. I’m just not sure what it’s purpose is. It has it’s own sentience, much like the Tree of Harmony does. But this one feels different.” She lays down in front of it, resting her head on her hooves while she thought some more.

“The power that this tree possesses is at the same level as the Tree of Harmony, but this one feels… foreign. You can feel it's magic too though right?” She looks back up at me quizzically.

“Yea, I can, I just don’t know how to describe it, or even translate it to something useful for that matter.” I sit down next to her and rub her wing joints. “It’s starting to get late, what do you plan on doing here?”

“I think I’d like to stay another night here and see what I can get from this tree if you don’t mind.”

“Alright, I’ll set up camp then.”

I wake with a start, with an unnerving feeling that something is not right. I look down at Twilight, still sleeping quietly with her head resting on my shoulder. Gently pulling my arm out from under her, I grab my rifle and search for whatever is setting my nerves on end. It certainly didn’t take too long; as soon as I left the protective concealment of the willow-like branches, I was immediately tackled, finding a fighting knife held at my throat, held by a man in black armor wearing a mask of a yellowed skull. Instinct kicked in, and I grabbed his wrist and folded his arm back up enough to get out from under the knife. He put all his weight back down on the knife, and I rolled to the side, using his momentum to drive his head into the ground where I had been a split second before. Pinning his knife hand down, I twisted the blade from his hand, and chopped his elbow, hyper-extending it. To his credit, he didn’t even grunt, just rolled away enough to get back up and reset his arm. By the time he had his arm back into a normal angle, I had found my rifle, and raised it to fire before finding one just like my own pointed right back at me, putting us both into a Mexican standoff.

“Who the fuck are you?” I ask, slightly out of breath.

“You’re in my woods, you don’t get to ask questions.” He replies in a rumbling voice. I lower my rifle just a hair, looking at him with narrowed eyes.

“Your woods? How long have you been here?” I ask. Things are starting to get a little bit out of line with what I’ve known about this place so far.

He lowers his own rifle, then drops it completely, slinging it over his back again, as I do the same. He removes his mask, showing a full bearded face, worn by the elements.

“Three years.” He says tiredly. “Since I was banished by Celestia, I’ve been living out here, where no one else can bother me. You and your princess friend here are the first I’ve seen in months.” He says ‘princess’ with no small amount of disdain. I cock my head at him, ready to go back for round two.

“What’s your problem with the princesses?” I ask. “They’ve been pretty helpful to me, getting me aquainted with this place.”

“You obviously haven’t been used by Celestia like I have. I was her personal assassin, used to carry out the missions that she couldn’t allow to be seen in the public eye. You’re a soldier, or at least you used to be. I can tell by how you fight, how you move with that rifle of yours, so don’t tell me that you’ve never heard of a government using people like us to do it’s dirty work.” He spits out angrily. “Then, just as I had finally settled down, and was starting to be happy with my life again, she had no more use for me, so she banished me, and erased my very existance from history.”

This doesn’t sound like the Celestia that I’ve come to know. I hear rustling from within the willow branches, and a grumbling “John…?”

Turning back to the newcomer, I realize that things might come to a boil far quicker than I would like. “Does she know about you?”

“I don’t know.” He says. “I would think that she does. I met her once before, before she was a princess, and it wasn’t the friendliest of encounters.” He chuckles fondly at the memory. “But with her being a princess now, not to mention Celestia’s former protégé, she probably does. I gotta warn you, don’t get too cozy with her, it might end up fucking you later on.”

The branches part, and Twilight pokes her head out, looking around. “John, who are you talking to….?” She inhales sharply. “YOU!” she flashes her magic, capturing the man and bringing him in closer. “You’re not supposed to be anywhere in Equestria, under penalty of death. Why are you here?”

He looks at me with bored indifference. “Well, I guess that answers that question.” Returning his gaze to Twilight, he frowns down at her. “You really are deluded, you know that? I can’t say that I blame you. You’re young, newly crowned. You haven’t seen the dark underbelly of politics, the dirty doings that no one wants seen by those that they rule.”
“You haven’t answered my question.” She growls back. “But if you wish to play games, then we will have to resort to more… painful methods of getting answers from you. Once we have what we’re looking for, a summary execution will be in order.”

“Whoa…. Hold on there for a second Twilight, last I knew you ponies didn’t pull shit like that, what’s with the sudden change in policy, and when did you gain the power to make that kind of decision?” I ask, suddenly very alarmed at the new turn of events.

“I was under the impression that I was the only human here, until we come out here and stumble upon him. Obviously, someone has been lying about something here, and I would very much like to get to the bottom of this.”

“I think that I may be able to give you what you need to know, if you’ll listen. Otherwise, you might as well save yourselves the trouble and off me right here.” The newcomer says. He looks at Twilight, who begrudgingly nods. “Can you please release me? I’m not gonna pull anything on you. Your bodygaurd here can make sure of that.” He nods in my direction.

Twilight rolls her eyes, raising him up a couple extra feet before dropping him to the ground. “He’s not my bodyguard, he’s-“ she suddenly stops, looking at me quickly, ears laid down before turning back to him. “Nevermind what he is to me, it’s none of your concern.”

“Hey, I don’t judge, I loved a pony once too.” He smiles at me, his eyes telling me ‘be careful with her…’

“Twilight, can I speak to you for a moment?” We head back closer to the tree, before she sits down, looking up at me defiantly. “What is your problem with him?” I ask, kneeling down in front of her and wrapping my arms around her. She looks at me angrily, and pulls away.

“Seriously? You don’t see what he's doing? He’s manipulating you, probably to get back at Celestia. He did horrible things to get banished, murdered innocent ponies, threatened the Princess herself, and probably would have actually murdered her too had my brother and his guards not been there.” She starts pacing back and forth, working into a frenzy. “He even manipulated Fluttershy and Rarity. Fluttershy came to her senses and ran away, but Rarity fell for it, and they even got married! Celestia had to erase her memories of him in order to get her out of his spell. Then he went and murdered all those pegasi, not even caring if they were innocent fillies or colts. He killed an entire village of them. And you think that he deserves to be defended?” She stops her pacing and glares at me, wanting to hear my explanation.

Sighing, I try to think of some way to put forth something rational. I’ve said so myself how violent people can be, and its obvious that they think this stranger is a prime example of it. But something doesn’t seem right.

“Since when were humans able to cast spells?” I deadpan. “Even now, three years later, some of your magic has to be tailored to affect me. Humans are non-magical creatures. We’re unaffected by it, and unable to use it. And if he had indeed attacked that village full of pegasi. Don’t pegasi live on clouds? Do you think he was able to just magically walk on those clouds, at least without outside assistance?” I pause, getting into my own frenzy. “Has he even had a chance to prove his innocence? Did he go on trial? It sounds like the conclusions that you have were fed to you. And honestly, there must be ways that ones innocence can be proven.”

She looks up gruffly. “Fine. If you really want to see for yourself, I will show you. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.” She walks back out in a huff, to where the newcomer is sitting with his back to a tree, picking his nails with his knife.
“Daniel, John has… convinced me to look into your claims. You are familiar with memory reading spells, yes?” He nods quietly. “Then I will read your memories, and pass them on to John to see himself.” With that, she lights her horn, and touchs it to his forehead. She holds it there for a few seconds, before pulling back, a look of utter shock on her face.

“That… that’s impossible! She would never have done that! All those ponies, dead, because she… she stops, tears streaming down her face, and walks over to me, before touching her horn to my own forehead. With a sudden jolt, all the memories that she had were copied to my own mind. She pulls back slightly, looking into my eyes, before coming in and pushing up to my chest. “I’m so sorry John. I never knew she would actually do this. You will see what it is that I'm referring to. I need to go, I need some time to myself, to think about this. I’ll be back by sunrise, I promise. I love you.” With a quick kiss, she pulls back and teleports away.

Now thouroughly confused, I look to 'Daniel' my mind whispers to me. Whoa, that was weird as all hell. Since when did my brain do that? “How do I see the memories that she gave me?”

He shrugs at me. “I don’t know for sure. Never done it myself. I’d have to guess its like any other memory, just think about remembering it.”

Suddenly, everything rushes in within a matter of seconds. It’s no wonder Twilight wigged out so badly. I see everything, from when he first arrived to when he was finally banished from Equestria. Jumping up, I stagger around, trying to regain my bearings while the world spins from all the simultaneous input. Finally, everything settles back down, and I sit back down. “I’m so sorry Dan. You’re right, I’m no stranger to black ops, but that shit’s just plain cold.” I pull out a cigarette, needing one now more than ever. Lighting it, I offer one to Dan, who shrugs and takes one himself.

“So what are you gonna do?” I ask. “I really cant say I blame you for feeling this way about Celestia, and to be honest, I'm wondering myself about what her plans are now. How much of our trek here in the woods have you seen?”
“Most of it. I spotted the two of you about noon the day that you camped on that ridge. I have to say, the way you handled those timberwolves was fairly impressive for never seeing them before. As you can see, 5.56 ammo doesn’t do much more than piss them off, but they hate the noise.” He takes a drag before continuing. “I’m sorry that my innocence had to be proven to her in such a drastic way. She seems like she’s genuinely nice.”

“Well, she did just have everything she’s known to be true turned upside down and thrown into a blender, so I cant say I'm surprised she reacted so strongly.” I stand back up, and walk towards the tree again. “How long has this been here?”
“About three weeks. Before it was just another hill here. Then the tree just started growing, not like Jack’s beanstalk fast, but over the course of a few days. Still pretty fast for a tree. While I was inspecting it one day, Discord stopped by. Jumped the everloving shit out of me, but he seemed to be expecting me to be there. Told me there was something in motion that he couldn’t quite figure out, that even he had no control over, and that I should stick around until the tree is fully grown. Then just disappeared as fast as he had showed up. When the tree was large enough, it spit this thing out at me.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small shield, blood red with crossed rifles.

I pull out my own, and hold it next to his for comparison. “Well I’ll be damned… It’s a good thing we didn’t kill each other. Looks like were supposed to be on the same team for some reason or other.”

Just as the sun begins to rise, Twilight reappears. She quickly comes over and nuzzles into the side of my neck, giving me a quick embrace before bowing low in front of Dan.

“Daniel Armstrong, I cannot speak for the other princesses, but I offer you my sincerest apologies for the crimes that have been committed against you. I will do whatever I can to make this right, and I will not quit until it is so.” She holds her bow, while Dan looks to me, unsure what to do. I just shrug with a ‘I don’t have a clue’ look.

Looking down at her, he sighs, and pulls her up before giving her a close embrace. “I would like to see Rarity again if that’s alright with you.”

Nodding, she pulls back. “Yes, I will definitely allow that. She has no memory of you, and I don’t know how to give them back to her.”

“Well, maybe we could start by returning this.” He pulls out a small ring hanging from a chain around his neck. “It’s the ring that I gave her when we were wed. Maybe it will help her to remember.” He says, putting the chain back under his vest.

“I’m going to teleport us all back to my castle. You can stay there for the time being.”

I chuckle. This should be interesting. “I hope you had a good breakfast, because you’re gonna be seeing it again.” And with a flash, everything turns white.

Back in the castle, Dan quickly runs to the corner and dry heaves for a few minutes before regaining his composure. He returns, holding his stomach. “Well, that was… interesting.”

“You handled it better than my first teleport. First time she pulled that on me, I ended up puking all over her.” I chuckle at the memory. “You should have seen her face.”

Twilight sighs, and turns to me. “There were two more of those cavities on that tree, though one of them had already given out it’s element already. I don’t know who the other two are, but we need to find them.”

Dan steps forward, pulling his own shield out. “I’m guessing this is what you’re talking about.” He says, holding it for Twilight to look at. It gave it to me when I found it. Discord said that there were things outside of his control going on. Sounded bad judging by the tone of his voice.

“We’ll figure that out soon enough I hope. For now, I will show you to your room. John, why don’t you head to my chambers, I will meet you back there.” She teleports Dan away, leaving me to find my own way.

“Glad to see you’re back.” I turn and find Spike walking up chewing on a ruby. “Why did she bring him though? I thought he was banished.”

“He still is, but Twilight realized… things that made her believe what Dan was saying. He really is innocent. I’ll let Twilight fill you in on that though, I don’t know how to break that kind of thing to you gently.” I start walking to Twilight’s chambers. “You wouldn’t believe the trip that we had.”

I explain to him about the tree that we found, and what we think is going on with it. “I don’t know for sure what it’s doing this for, but I have a really bad feeling about it.” We stop in front of Twilight’s door. “I hate to be rude, but it’s been a really long night, especially for Twilight, and I think she wants to get some rest.”

“Yea, that’s fine. I havent really gotten anything made for breakfast yet, so I can wait until you get back up before I make anything.” He walks away, chewing the remnants of his ruby like a hard candy.

Sighing, I open Twilight’s door, finding her already inside, laying dejectedly on the bed. “How much did you tell Spike?” She asks.

“I told him about the tree that we found, and what we think might be going on with it. I also told him about Dan’s innocence, though I left out the really crazy details. I didn’t know how to break it to him gently. I’m sure that he’s not going to take it well. How are you holding up?” I sit down on the bed next to her, rubbing behind her ears. She closes her eyes, and a single tear rolls down her face. “I don’t know what to think. Celestia has always seemed to be… above this kind of thing. I would expect something like this from some of the nobles, but not her. She leans over and rests her head on my chest, crying openly now. “It feels like everything I’ve known is a lie. How much more of this has she done without me knowing? What else has she done? I can’t bear to think about it.”
Pulling her in close, I sigh. “Twilight, no government is without its dark dealings. Every government in my world was like this. I know it sounds harsh, but it’s a fact of life really.” She shudders in my hold. “You need to rest Twilight, I’ll leave you be so you can think, and try to rest.” Kissing her, I go to stand, but she holds me back.

“John, if you don’t mind, could you stay here with me? You’re probably tired too, and I need you here with me, please.”
“Sure, I can do that for you.” Laying down, Twilight quickly curls in close, kisses me and drifts off to sleep.

A few hours later, Twilight, Spike and I, along with Twilight’s student Starlight Glimmer, are seated at the table eating dinner. Dan hasn't been seen since his arrival here, but knowing him, he’s probably somewhere just out of sight, getting a feel of the castle.

“So, what’s with this new tree of power that you found out in the White Tail Woods?” Starlight asks. “And why are the only ones who have been connected to it humans?”

“We’re not sure what it’s for. Though from what I gather, it seems to be connected to those who are more inclined to war than anything else.” Twilight says academically.

I look over at her, head cocked to the side. “What are you trying to say Twilight? That the only thing I’m good for nothing more than picking a fight?”

Twilight blushes furiously at me, “Uh… I mean… um, no…? It seems that it is calling for those that are inclined to be more… protective than normal. You and Dan both are both soldiers, correct?”

“Marine.” Dan corrects flatly as he walks into the dining hall. His tone speaks of constantly having to make that correction. “Now that I’ve finally figured out where you guys eat, what's on the menu?” Sitting down, he looks around, impressed. “Last time I was here, this was a library, carved out of an oak tree. What happened to it?”

“Tirek.” Twilight growls darkly. “He stole all the ponies’ magic, then went on a huge rampage, destroying everything in his path. Nearly took out Ponyville. Asshole. After beating him, the Elements of Harmony grew this castle in place of the library.”

“Ah, yea. I remember Tirek. Yea. Asshole. I saw some of the shit he pulled before he went all Godzilla here. Damn near killed those ponies when he took their magic.”

“Why didn’t you shoot him and make our lives that much easier?” Twilight asks flatly.

“Karma’s a bitch Twilight.” Dan says with a grin, helping himself to some salmon.

“Twilight opens her mouth to retort, but reconsiders before going back to her meal. Suddenly, Spike belches out a jet of green fire, depositing a scroll on the table, which Twilight promptly picks up and opens in her magic. Reading it, her expression goes from bored, to sudden interest. Without another word, she puts the scroll down and teleports away.

“Well, that was rude.” Dan muses to himself. “I wonder what the letter said.” Picking it up, I read it out loud.

Dear Princess Twilight,
Another human has appeared, and is currently in my custody at the castle. Take him with you back to Ponyville, and get him up to date with John. I would also like to discuss your trip to the White Tail Woods.

Sincerely,

Princess Celestia

“Oh I hope she doesn’t run her mouth about me.” Dan groans to himself.

“She might not have to. I’m pretty sure that Luna was keeping an eye on things.” I murmur back to him. “Either way, the gig’s up for Celestia. Now its just a matter of seeing who stands where when the dust settles.”

“What’s going on over in Canterlot that has all of you acting like this?” Starlight asks standing from her spot at the table. “I’ve never known anyone to do anything dishonest there, aside from some of the shadier nobles, but certainly not a princess!”

“Apparently you haven’t worked in any sort of government for very long. The bigger it is, the uglier it gets. And Celestia is one big motherfucker.” Dan says wryly. “Soon enough, she’ll lay in this bed that she’s made. I wont kill her. That’s too easy. I just hope that I'm still around to see it.” He looks over at me. “Have you met Rarity yet?”

I shake my head. “Aside from spending a week in the dungeon for beating up some of the hospital staff when I woke up, I’ve been stuck here more or less. I wasn’t allowed to be seen by anyone other than Twlight’s ‘Elements of Harmony’ until just before we went into the White Tail Woods.”

“Well, Rarity is one of her Elements.” He pulls her ring out from under his uniform again, and looks at it forlornly. “She truly was a very loving pony. Very sweet indeed. I hope that she’s been able to do well for herself these last few years.

“What happened?” Starlight asks, returning to her seat.

“Yea, what gives? You can’t keep us in the dark forever.” Spike adds.

With a purple flash Twilight reappears, with another man in tow. He quickly runs to the corner and loses his lunch. “Heh. At least you didn’t get puked on this time.” I chuckle at Twilight.”
She glares at me for a second, then softens her look and smiles at me, nuzzling my neck. “You should have seen it the first time I ever tried it myself.”

The newcomer walks over to the table holding his stomach. “Ugh. Let’s not do zat again. Vere is zis place?” he asks looking around.

“You are in my castle in Ponyville, where I've been placed in charge of keeping you comfortable until we can figure out what’s going on. Now is a good time for everyone to get into introductions. She looks at me first.
“John Anderson, Staff Sergeant, 3rd Ranger Battalion, United States Army. I report around a mouthful of salmon. “Served in Iraq in the early parts of the war. Been out for about 10 years now.”
“Daniel Armstrong, First Sergeant, Force Recon, United States Marine Corps. I was in the middle of an op when I ended up here about three years ago.”
“Hmmm, vell, at least I am in good company, ja?” the newcomer says with a smile and sits down. “My name is Aurik Wilhelm, Feldwebel with the German KSK.”
“Huh?” I blurt out. I worked in a fair amount of joint force operations, but I was a little rusty on foreign rank.
“It’s zee same as your Staff Sergeant.” He says matter-of-factly, helping himself to the remains of dinner. “Vat I’m still wondering is how I got here, and vy.” He says, looking more to Twilight now.
“Well, we’re not exactly sure why. I can show you how you got here, in one way or another. Though you’re probably not going to like how I take you there.”
I finish my meal and stand up. “I think I'm going to go out and relax for a bit before heading to bed. I’ll be outside.”

I go and grab a cup of coffee, and head out to think. Shortly after, Twilight appears next to me. “Let’s go to the balcony outside our room, there’s more privacy there than right outside the front door of the castle.” She flashes her horn again, and the world rematerializes into the balcony high above the ground.

Immediately, Twilight jumps up and wraps her hooves around me, leaning into my chest. “I feel so guilty about lying to Celestia. I can’t help but wonder if she knows more than she’s letting on to.”

“I don’t know Twilight, but we’re going to have to do something about this soon. I have a feeling we don’t have time on our side.” I sit down on a bench, with Twilight nuzzling under my chin. “What about you? You’re pretty shaken up about this, and I’m sure that you don’t trust her all that much anymore. I certainly don’t.”

“I don’t, to be honest. Not only did she go against everything I’ve ever been taught, but this violates most of the tenets of the Elements of Harmony. As a bearer of one of those elements, and the leader of that group, I have to take action. I just don’t know what I will do.”

“What about the other princesses?” I ask. “Do they know the truth about this?”

“I don’t know.” She whispers. “I can’t imagine that they do. They would never go along with it. Not even Luna.”

“Well, hopefully not. I’m pretty sure that Luna was watching over us the whole time we were in the woods. It wouldn’t surprise me if she came to visit in one way or the other.”

She sighs, and starts pacing around. “Maybe we should talk to Celestia. We both know that we have to be careful in how we approach this.” She looks at me sternly. “I know how strongly you feel about this, loyalty to other humans and all, and the fact that you seem to share a bond with others like yourself. I don’t blame you, I feel the same way with my friends. But you need to be careful in what you say.” She nuzzles me gently before kissing me. “I’m going to bed now. I love you.” She retreats to her room, leaving me to my thoughts.

I sit back down and look over Ponyville, far below. “I wonder if Luna can hear me if I call for her. It would certainly be handy.”

“Nay, we cannot hear you, but we happened to be here because we wish to speak with you.” A familiar, dark figure lands on the balcony in front of me. “We will be direct, for this is of grave importance. Why dost thou harbor the man that our sister banished from Equestria?”

“He’s innocent Princess. Twilight and I both saw for ourselves. Memory magic is really handy that way.” I state matter-of-factly. “Would you care to see for yourself what I’m talking about?”

“Yes, we suppose that it would make it much simpler to see things from his perspective. Would we be able to see him, and his memories?”

“No, but I have his memories myself. As does Twilight. Frankly, I can’t believe that Celestia would do something like that.”

“We shall see.” She lights her horn, and touches it to my brow momentarily, and I feel a strange tug in the back of my mind. “Oh. Oh my. So it is true. He really is innocent.” She sits down in dismay. “This must be addressed. We cannot allow this to be ignored. That is a grievous abuse of power, one that we hope to never see happen again. What dost thou intend to do?”

“Twilight and I were gonna confront her about it. As it is, it seems that Daniel is here for the same reason that myself and this new guy Aurik are here. So he’s critical to whatever we need to accomplish. We need him.” I pause as I light a cigarette. “And Rarity deserves to know the truth too, about what her and Dan meant to each other. She destroyed their lives, and that needs to be addressed too. I just don’t know how to go about it without suffering the same fate.”

“Unfortunately, with this revelation, nothing is going to be the same anymore. Celestia cannot stay in power, not if she’s abusing it the way that she is. The Elements of Harmony are no longer bound to us, and they would not accept Celestia as a bearer now regardless. She cannot use them against us anymore. All that she has is whatever support she would have from the Equestrian military.” Luna pauses, looking down at her hooves. “We cannot believe that we are saying this, but we must overthrow our sister. If that brings war upon us, then so be it.”

“Twilight isn’t going to take to that too well.” I toss the cigarette away and finish my coffee. “She might now know just how bad this is, and that something needs to be done, but she prefers to go about a more peaceful route. Unfortunately, the longer a ruler sits on a throne, the more likely they are to violently resist being taken off.” I approach Luna and look closely into her eyes. “How far are you willing to take this?”

Luna looks away. “We will do what we must to protect Equestria and it’s citizens. Hopefully when this is all over, we have not gone too far to keep our souls. What of you?”

I shrug. “I’m a soldier, again. I do what I’m good at. Take it however you wish, but what I’m good at, is killing. I don’t enjoy it, but I accept that sometimes, it has to be done. I would prefer to not kill her, and Dan feels the same. Aurik, he probably couldn’t care less. He has no reason to hold a grudge for the moment.” I sigh, really wanting to go to sleep. “We should gather what forces we can, because once the cat gets out of the bag, we’re all gonna have targets on our backs.”

“Yes, we agree. We will begin this immediately. We must depart now, however, so we bid thee farewell.” She spreads her wings to fly away, but I interrupt her.

“Luna, can you help me with Twilight? Shes taking this really hard, and she needs some comfort and guidance.”
She smiles back at me, and nods. “Of course we will John. You love her, and wish what’s best for her well-being. We are happy for you two.” Without anything further, she lifts off and flies into the night. Returning to the balcony door, I enter, and finding Twilight already asleep, I gently close the door and join her.

Author's Note

This is a collaborative work with a friend of mine, Daniel is a character from his fic Celestia's Secret Guard by Lumox6. You can find his backstory here:
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/375672/celestias-secret-guard

Reunion

“Dan, you sure you’re ready for this?” I ask as we approach the doors to the map room. “I know that this is something that you want, but you haven’t really thought out how you’re going to do this. I don’t want everything to backfire on you.”

“Look John, I’m not winging this as much as you think. You and Twilight are helping in your own way, along with her friends. Everything will work out fine.” He stops at the door, pausing to collect himself. “I hope.”

“Yez, I have to agree with Daniel on zis John, he has been horribly wronged, and zis must be fixed quickly. Ve have many important matters to attend to.” Aurik, looking the most refreshed out of all of us, sips at his coffee, seeming to enjoy everything around him “If ve are to be successful in zis campaign against ze prinzess, ve will need to have an army behind us, and a place where we can operate out of. Otherwise, ve will be wiped off ze map.”

“Yea, warfare 101, I know.” I rub my face, wishing I could get some coffee myself. ‘You seem to be enjoying yourself here, way more than us. What’s up with that?” I ask.

“If you went through what I just got away from, you would enjoy everything around you as well my friend.” He takes another sip of coffee. “Are you ready to begin Daniel?”

He sighs before looking at me. “Yea.”

Seeing him calmer, I open the door, letting him through before following myself and closing the door behind me. Seated before us around the Cutie Map are Twilight and the rest of the Elements of Harmony, along with a very tired looking Princess Luna.

“Welcome everypony. Before we begin our meeting there is an important matter that must be attended to first.” Twilight looks to Daniel and I apprehensively.

“Rarity.” Luna begins. “Three years ago, a human appeared in the halls of Canterlot Castle in the middle of the Changeling Invasion. Although initially fearing him to be a Changeling, they realized he wasn't, and was employed by Celestia as…” she looks to Dan uncomfortably “a soldier of sorts. While he performed his duties admirably, he also began to bond with the ponies in Ponyville.” She looks to Dan again, who has now started shifting on his feet in the awkward conversation.

“What is this all about?” Rarity quietly asks, looking at Dan herself and trying to understand.

“One of the ponies that he became close with was you, Rarity.” Twilight adds. “You fell in love, even married, until Celestia wiped the memories that you had of him. He was framed for murder and banished from Equestria, so he hid in the White Tail Woods, waiting for his chance to come back to you until we found him.”

“How is this possible?” Rarity asks quietly. “I don’t recall much of anything from that time. There’s something faint, but I can never fully understand it.”

“Maybe I could help." Daniel steps forward, but Rarity pulls back in fear, causing Dan to hold back. He looks to the floor, downcast, and then reaches under his shirt, and pulling out a necklace. "Rarity, when we were wed, I gave you this ring." He kneels down in front of her, presenting it to her. "We started to grow close beforehand though, when you made me uniforms to work in." He gestures down to the clothes that he wore. "I even kept a journal of our time together." He reaches into his pocket, pulling out a small green book. Opening it, he begins to read a passage.

"I finally found the perfect gift for Rarity today, and now I think that I'll be able to propose to her. I've never been able to put too much romance into anything, but I sincerely hope that the love that we share will make her happy. I have one more mission left, and then we can settle down and start a family together." Finished with the entry, he quietly closes the journal, meeting Rarity's gaze, who is now openly weeping.

Rarity's gaze returns to the ring held in her magic, transfixed. "Is it true?" She whispers, looking over to Twilight, who bows her head in sorrow. "Were we really married? Happy?"

"Yes, you were. You were planning on settling down together, starting a family. When Celestia no longer had any use for Daniel as a pawn, she simply made him disappear."

Tears continue to fall down Rarity's face as she moves closer to Twilight. "And what did you do to stop it?" Her tone is cold, furious. "You're a princess too, are you not? You could have said something. Done something. But instead you just left everything to her again, like a coward! You couldn't stand up for your friends? For what you though was right?!

Twilight reaches to put a hoof on Rarity's shoulders, "Rarity, I-"

"No, stop! I do not want to hear from you." Twilight pulls back in shock, ears laid back, even as Rarity advances on her in a full-blown fury. "You did nothing but stand by and watch. Unable to think for yourself because SHE was the one to give the order, and you didnt question it. You let her destroy the lives that we had built, and left us with nothing." She retreats to her seat, visibly distraught. "Please leave us Twilight." she whispers, almost too low to hear.

Twilight sits down hard, shock on her face, and looks to Dan for input, who simply frowns and look away. He leans over Rarity and pulls her into an embrace, seemingly putting a stop to the conversation as a whole. Applejack walks over and puts a hoof on Twilight's shoulder.

"Ah appreciate yer honesty Twi, but Rarity here is gonna need some time to heal. We'll help 'er, but she needs space. Please understand."

With a nod, Twilight turns around and leaves, quietly shutting the door behind her. I look to Luna, who seems just as guilt-ridden as Twilight. "I'm gonna go and be with Twilight, she shouldn't have to be alone either." Luna just nods and looks away again.

Going through the door, I take one last look back, and see Dan holding Rarity to his chest, surrounded by all her friends. Even Pinkie, the ever hyper source of cheer, has been hurt, her normally poofy mane flat. He looks me in the eye, a silent thanks in his expression. Nodding back at him, I close the door and begin looking for Twilight.

“How are you holding up?” I ask Twilight. We decided to go for a walk around Ponyville while Dan and Rarity reconnect.

“I’m doing OK John. I cant say that I didn't really see this outcome.” She pauses to sniff at some roses one of the street vendors had on display. "When I was first told about Dan, I just took it as the truth. I didn’t think for a second that he had been set up. Now I don’t know what to think.” We reach a park bench, and sit, not really feeling like doing much of anything else.

"I first began on the path that brought me to where I am now when I saw Celestia for the first time as a filly." Twilight whispers. "Ever since, I made it my personal mission to be the best there ever was at magic. When I was nine, I was accepted into Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, as her personal student. Passing the entrance exam was actually how I gained my cutie mark, and how I met Spike." A glimmer of a smile crossed her face, then was gone just as quickly. I had never heard this personal side of her. I take her hoof in my hand, giving whatever support I can.

"I was so engrossed in my studies that I never really made any friends. In my final year, Celestia sent me here, to Ponyville, saying that I needed to make some friends. That's how I came to be friends with the ponies here. She did this because she needed me to defeat Nightmare Moon, and bring back Princess Luna. Eventually, and after defeating many different enemies with my friends, I was coronated as a Princess of Equestria. Looking back on all of this, I can't help but wonder if maybe I'm just another piece on a giant chessboard." I don't know what to think, let alone tell her, so I keep my counsel to myself for the moment, and look out at the town busying itself around us.

We had been out of the castle for a few hours now, and the afternoon was starting to get late. In the distance, I see Spike and Rarity coming closer. Rarity slows, then stops in front of Twilight, with Spike nervously hanging back. "John, I know that you truly mean well, but can you give Twilight and I a moment alone please?" she looks to me quietly.

"Sure. Let's go grab something to eat, Spike."

Leaning down, I gently rub behind Twilight's ear and kiss her cheek. "I'll meet you back at the castle." With a small smile to Rarity, Spike and I head out to the market.

Sitting at the local ice cream shop, Spike and I are trying to pass the time waiting for Twilight and Rarity to return. Not much is said, which is fine, I've been getting an odd feeling in the back of my mind, and I can't shake the suspicion that I'm being watched. Looking around, I see a certain dark green pegasus that's been discreetly following me around.

"Hey Spike, lets get going back to the castle. I told Twilight that we would meet her there."

Spike nods and gets up. "Yea, I'm not really feeling up to doing much right now anyways." We head back for the castle, but stop at SugarCube Corner. Just before opening the door, I see the same pegasus quickly dart into the alley next to the shop. The bell at the door jingles softly as the door opens, and Mrs. Cake looks to me and smiles. "Why hello there John, how can I help you?"

"I was actually hoping that you could do me a quick favor." I hold up a fistful of bits. "Is there any chance I could use your side door into the alleyway next to the building?" She nods quickly with an anxious look. "I might be coming back through, just leave it unlocked."

Carefully opening the side door, I peek out towards the street, where the same pegasus stands, watching the doorway into the shop. I'll only have one chance to get this right, or he'll fly away and the sorely needed element of surprise is lost. Creeping up behind him, I grab him by the mane and slam his head into the wall, stunning him. With a hard stomp to his outstretched wing, he is effectively immobilized as he screams in agony. I knock him out with a fist to the temple, and drag him back into the shop, much to Mrs. Cake's horror.

"WHATDIDYOUDOTOHIMISHEDEADWHY-"

"Mrs. Cake, please calm down, I caught him spying on Princess Twilight and she's going to want to know why." Not exactly a lie persay.... "Spike, could you please go find Twilight and have her come here? And have a secure room prepared for our newest guest?" Spike stands frozen, unable to process what happened. I forget that he's never seen me or any of the guys do our thing. "Spike, snap out of it, time is critical here."

Shaking his head, he runs off to find Twilight as I turn to Mrs. Cake again. "Mrs. Cake, I'm really sorry, I wish I didn't have to have him in here. I'll just pretend that I was never here and hide in back until Princess Twilight arrives."

As if on cue, Twilight appears in a burst of magic. "JOHN WHAT IN TARTARUS HAVE YOU DONE?!"

"Twilight we need to get him back to the castle, he's been spying on you all afternoon and I don't know why, but we need to find out. He's unconscious, but I don't know how long he'll stay that way. We need to get going now!"

With a glare, Twilight teleports us back to her castle. Finding ourselves in the map room, she turns to me. "We WILL talk about this later. But for now, get him somewhere where he wont escape, and get whatever information you can out of him. I have to return to Mrs. Cake and make sure that she's not too traumatized, or trying to call Celestia." Twilight disappears again as Dan walks over.

"Looks like we're sharing the couch tonight. Who's this?"

"I don't know, caught him spying on Twilight and I, figured I'd find out why. Why are you in the doghouse tonight?"

"Well, not exactly in the doghouse. Rarity just needs some time to process everything."

"Gotcha. Where's Aurik?"

"Getting ready to head out to the bar."

"You think he'll pick up some tail?"

"I don't know, maybe."

Just then, Aurik walks by, dressed up in his least ratty looking fatigues. I yell out to him "Hey Aurik, make sure you take a couple rubbers with ya, you don't wanna be catching anything from these ponies."

"Vuck you, I'm not gonna go and sleep vith any of ze poniez, zat's just vucked up."

"You don't know what you're missing!" Dan yells after him.

Aurik looks back with a horrified look before walking off muttering under his breath. "Kranke ficken Amerikaner schlafen mit pferden, was zum Tuefel ist mit Leuten falsch."

"Five bits says he'll pick up a pony tonight." Dan says behind me.

"You and I both know he stands a pretty good chance of at least trying. The only reason I'd bet against that is if I knew no one was interested. But with the way things are going, who knows anymore. Make your bet with someone else. but for now, we have a prisoner to attend to."

"Wake up fuckface!" Our newest guest has been locked in a makeshift cell in the basement of Twilight's castle. It's 2 AM, and Dan and I figured now would be as good a time as any to play some good cop/bad cop. Princesses Luna and Twilight, and myself are standing behind a partition hiding us from view. The pegasus is jolted awake when he gets a 5 gallon bucket of ice water dumped over his head.

"What's with the peeping tom routine you got going on?"

The pegasus looks up at Dan scared out of his mind. Dan had donned his yellow skull mask to hide his identity, and maybe play some mind games at the same time.

"Is this how you treat all your prisoners?" Twilight hisses at me. "I still don't understand why you had to break his wing. I can see knocking him unconscious, but you could have killed him with the way you attacked him, and DRAGGING him into Mrs. Cake's shop?"

"Do we have to talk about what your favorite teacher did to Dan, or my first week in Equestria? Or how you reacted when I tried to shake your hoof when we first met? You ponies weren't exactly the friendliest of folks you know." I hiss back.

"You beat up your doctor, put a couple orderlies in the ICU, and went on a rampage through town."

"Don't forget that where I'm from, horses aren't miniature technicolor talking beings with magic and wings, so please excuse me if I was just a little bit freaked out."

By this time we're both eye to eye, Twilight standing on her hind hooves with her forehooves on my shoulders for support, when Luna clears her throat. "If thou could be so kind, either get a room or get a boxing ring, we care not which."

Twilight drops back down in a huff. "I still don't understand your methods."

"It's a common tactic in our world when interrogating prisoners. We call it good cop bad cop. Dan's job is to make the prisoner not trust him. I'll go in later and act all nice, and try to earn his trust. It's all a mind game."

Looking out to where Dan is, I see that he now has the pegasus tied to a table with a cloth sack over his head, pouring water on his face.

"And just what exactly is this going to accomplish?" Twilight grumbles.

"You don't wanna know. There's a reason I suggested you and Luna stay out of view. Especially you Princess Luna." I walk over to Dan, signalling to switch places. Untying the pegasus, I allow him to sit back down while Dan leaves the room.

"So what's the name kid?" I ask him calmly. I pull a smoke out of my shirt pocket and light it. The pegasus simply glowers at me. "Look, I'm sorry I kinda kicked your ass back there. Honestly. I didn't know what you were trying to pull back there, and I've grown kinda protective of Twilight lately. It's just in my nature I suppose." Still nothing. I pull an apple out of my pocket, polishing it and putting it on the table in front of him.

"Look, I'm actually a nice guy once you get to know me. I'm just wondering what you were up to out there. As I'm sure you're aware, not everyone is... friendly towards Princess Twilight. But who knows, maybe you were just looking to meet her in person, maybe get an autograph? What's the harm in that? I tell you what, if you're honest with me, maybe I can cut you a deal, get the Princess to cut you some slack."

To his credit, he hasn't budged one bit, doing nothing save for staring a hole in my forehead. I take a final drag before putting the cigarette out on the floor.

"How's your wing doing?" He narrows his eyes for a split second. Good, I've hit a nerve. "I mean, jeez, that's gotta suck, not being able to fly and all that. We can get it fixed, but we gotta get some answers first."

"You want some fucking answers?" He suddenly snaps. "No one here likes you. Or that other human that showed up a little while ago. Princess Celestia doesn't either. You're not the first one to show up either. The last time we had one of you here, he went on a killing spree and was banished. You are all the same, human" he spits out.

"Yes, Princess Twilight told me about him. A real asshole if you ask me. So Princess Celestia sent you to keep an eye on me then. Make sure I don't do the same thing I take it."

"She just doesn't want you getting too close to the Princess. Doesn't want you taking over."

"Well, sorry to say, but it's kind of a waste of time to be honest. You get some sleep now, ya hear? Wake up call is at six." I get up and make for the door, leaving the apple behind. Twilight and Luna are waiting outside for me.

"I can't believe that actually worked. Usually we just let them sit in a dungeon without any food until they're ready to talk." Twilight mutters.

"You just need to learn how to get into their head." I snark back.

"Or, thou couldst have allowed us to look into his dreams and we would have been able to get it that way." Luna mutters.

"Sorry Princess, but time is a commodity that we don't have. He didn't say much, but we now know that at the very least, I'm still under Celestia's watch. I'm sure that Celestia's expecting a report from him soon. Once she realizes something's up, she's gonna come down hard. We should move, soon."

The next morning, after making amends with Twilight over yesterday, Luna, Twilight, Dan and myself are seated in the dining hall eating breakfast and discussing our next move.

"Since time is no longer on our side, we should make our move as soon as we can." Dan says over his coffee.

"Yes, we should. Celestia seems to be getting suspicious of us. Ourself and Twilight can handle getting into the castle on our own, but the three of thou showing up heavily armed is going to raise the alarm. Dost thou have anything thou can do to help with that matter" Luna asks.

"Actually, we might. I still have my truck, and it seems that the engine still runs. It should be good for one last ride. we can even McGyver Dan's magic gun onto the roof and make a turret of some sort.

Dan perks up at this. "That sounds pretty fun. Bolt some armor onto it, it'll be like old times, with a little bit of Mad Max thrown in for good measure." He grins.

"Yea. Aurik can ride shotgun, you'll have the turret, and I'll drive. I just don't know how we'll get the truck to Canterlot."

"We will take care of that. Just make sure that thou eats a light breakfast."

"Speaking of our little German friend, where is he? I haven't seen him since he went out to the bar last night calling us a bunch of sick horse-fuckers." I ask.

"LANGUAGE JOHN." Twilight yells. Her cheeks are a distinctly dark shade of pink now.

'Wait, are we missing something? What dost thou mean by 'horse-fucker'?"

"NOTHING." Twilight yells again. Realization dawns on Luna's face as she falls over onto the table laughing.

"All this time.... HAHA and it took you meeting a human... HEHE to finally get laid?"

"OK, NEW SUBJECT!" I yell, getting a little flustered myself. "When Aurik gets back from his 'ahem' R&R, I'll get him back up to speed on what the plan is. We'll see about getting the truck ready, and getting as much ammo as we can together."

"Actually, we were the ones to cast the spell that Dan has on his weapon. If thou could give us your weapons for a few hours, we can do the same."

Later on that evening around dinner, Aurik finally staggers into the dining hall where we are all eating dinner with a noticeably wider stance to his gait.

"Oh hey Aurik. You uh, have a good time?" I can't help but grin. He hasn't gotten a chance to get used to Ponyville yet, but the castle is a pretty obvious landmark, so I know he wasn't lost.

"I don't vanna talk about it..."

"Get any tail last night?" Dan adds to the fire. Luna chokes on her dinner, trying not to laugh, while Twilight covers her face with her hooves.

"I said I don't vanna talk about it. You Americans are a bad influence. I am never going drinking with you sick vucks. Or with any of you ponies for that matter."

"Did you at least use the rubber I gave you last night?"

Aurik glares at me "I do not know."

I raise an eyebrow at him. "You should probably get yourself tested. Don't run off with your honey just yet, we got a mission briefing to do."

Assault

Author's Note

This chapter was written by a good friend of mine, Lumox6, who has been proofreading this story from the beginning, and collaborating with me on other related works. He wrote Dan and Aurik's stories, and can be found here: https://www.fimfiction.net/user/299708/Lumox6/stories

Assault

Equestria, Canterlot, Three days later

In the throne room of Canterlot castle, sat a flustered Princess Celestia. She had been pacing back and forth, reading the letter that she had found pinned to her wall by a strangely shaped knife, one that only one person could have. She set the knife down on the table and began pacing again, waiting for John to arrive with Twilight and Aurik.

Twilight, accompanied by John and Aurik, both now wielding purple rifles, styled after Twilight's cutie mark, come rushing into the throne room, fear quite evident on their faces. "Princess Celestia, what's wrong!?"

Princess Celestia has a look of fear on her face as she hands her the letter. "I found this attached to the outer gate wall this morning." She gives Twilight the note, before sitting on her throne.

Twilight's face turns a dark shade of green. "Celestia, what does this mean?" John motions for the letter as Twilight gives it to him. He takes it and reads it aloud.

"Dear Princess Celestia,

You stupid cunt... You crushed me, broke me down, lied to me, took away the one thing that made me more happy than any pony or human could ever be. You took away what I cherished most. Prepare your self Celestia, for I am coming for you with the rage of a thousand burning suns.

And I'm gonna start by taking the one thing you cherish most, the one thing you are most proud of, Your bitch of a student, Princess Twilight Sparkle." Twilight looks like she is going to faint as Aurik goes over to her to hold her up. "And after I drain every ounce of FUCKING blood from that whore's pretty little neck, I will not rest until I have slit the throats of every fucking pony from here to the Crystal Empire. Now that I mention it, I will start with Ponyville. Good luck stopping me.

Sweet Dreams, Princess Celestia.

Signed your doom, ARES "

John crumples the letter, dropping it to the ground. He walks over to Twilight, who is now openly sobbing, and hugs her.

"Princess Celestia," Aurik approaches Princess Celestia, rifle at his side. "Vhat do you need us for?" Princess Celestia looks at him before sighing.

"I need your protection." Celestia turns around and walks to one of the windows overseeing the courtyard, where soldiers march in and out by the hundreds. "I am sending nearly all of my soldiers into Ponyville to guard the town, even though it won't be enough to stop him."

"Stop who, exactly?" asks Aurik, who is now adjusting one of the straps on his helmet.

Celestia sighs "Ares is a human, much like you." Tears begin streaming down her face as she remembers what happened. "He arrived here the day of the changeling invasion, three years ago. We saw that he had certain..." She looked down to the floor, before bring it back up towards Aurik. "skills we saw as useful. We employed him as a mercenary, only to be used on special occasions, however, he eventually went on a killing spree and we had him banished from Equestria."

Aurik stood at attention, saluting Celestia. "Do not vorry princess, ve vill protect you." Aurik looks back at John who is now cocking his rifle.

"Yeah, no one threatens a princess and gets away with it." He lowers his rifle, walking to the window. He looks out, just in time to see the last of the soldiers leave, making their way towards Ponyville towards certain doom.

_____________________________________________________________________

Equestria, just outside of Canterlot walls, three hours later.

It is quiet as the Guards ponies patrol the wall, looking for any signs of an intruder. From what they had heard and seen, most of their forces were in Ponyville, protecting Princess Twilight, who had secretly been moved to Canterlot. One of the guards sat down at his post, quietly sipping his coffee, when one of his buddies comes trotting up. "Hey Flash, hows it going?" said the gray pegasus.

"It's going pretty good, I can't believe somepony threatened Princess Twilight." said the orange pegasus, taking off his helmet to let his blue mane flow through the air.

"Yeah, I know. So any luck with the princess?" asked the gray pegasus, a look of excitement on his face.

"Uh... not really, I think she do-"

tchhh

Bones and brain matter showered the gray pegasus as his friends head explodes into a fountain of red. The gray pegasus screams, trying to see where that magic came from. He runs over, ringing the alarm to let everypony know that Canterlot is under attack, before his brains are splattered against the alarm panel.

____________________________________________________________________________

In the throne room sit John, Aurik and Twilight, along with Princess Celestia and her sister, Princess Luna. John gets up and walks to the window, moving the curtain to see outside. "Vhats the plan, John?" asked Aurik, who was now getting up and walking over to John. "Vhat are ve going to do if he really does get through that army?" John looked at him, a look of determination on his face.

"We kill him when he enters the front gate."

Over across the room was Princess Luna, who was now scolding her sister. "How could you not tell us, your own sister, what you had done?" Princess Celestia sat there, looking at the picture behind her, a picture of her and her rule. "Hiring a mercenary to do what we could have done instead?" Luna looked away from her sister.

"I did it to protect my-" She stuttered, putting her hoof to her mouth and coughing. "Our rule. Without us, Equestria would be lost." Celestia tried putting a hoof on her sisters shoulder, but Luna just brushes it off before getting up from her throne.

"Forgive us sister, we have many a thing to do before our impending doom." Luna says as she walks out of the room. Aurik notices this and walks over to Celestia, who is now looking more sad than scared.

"Princess Vhat vill ve do if-" The alarm sounds, causing Celestia, Aurik, Twilight and John to jump.

"He is here!" Screams Celestia. She looks down at Aurik and John. "Please, I need you to protect me!"

"What about Twilight?" Asks John, who now has his weapon trained on the window. The alarm stops, causing everyone to lower their guard.

Celestia looks at Twilight, who now has a look of absolute panic on her face. "She can come with me, just protect us."

An explosion, followed by gunfire rings out as Aurik runs to the door, putting the bar lock down. He then runs back and pushes over a table, sitting down behind it. "I vill take care of him, go!"

John gives him a salute as he, followed by Twilight and Celestia, make their way down the hall towards the safe room.

__________________________________________________________________

Brain matter is spewed all across the wall as Ares walks past, his M24 limply laying over his shoulder. He walks over to the alarm box and switches it off. "Finally, that was getting fucking annoying." He looked at the now headless pegasi before him. "Tonight is just not your night, now is it?" He chuckles as he walks back towards the gate, his weapon changing from an M24 to an M79 Thumper. He opens the reciever, the new 40mm grenade, pops out. He lifts it up, admiring it. "Wow Luna, You did a fantastic job on this gun." He loads the 40mm grenade and clicks the receiver into place. He then aims it at the front gate. "Knock knock, motherfucker." He pulls the trigger, the projectile hits the gate, shattering it and sending shrapnel into the square. He unloads the grenade launcher, admiring as the grenade shell magically acquires another projectile. Once done, the grenade vibrates in his hand. He loads it, before it turns into an M240B.

Screams erupt as he walks through the front gate, his gun at hip level ready to be fired, he walks past some of the unlucky guards ponies that were right next to the gate when it exploded, some are missing legs, faces, one is even missing his lower jaw. He is still alive, screaming as his tongue flops around, trying to feel around for his jaw. "Poor guy."

BANG

The jawless ponies face immediately disappears in an explosion of red as his face is blown away by the 7mm bullet. Blood decorates the ground as he continues on towards the castle.

As he walks, he sees many ponies, all running to get away from him. Guards ponies run through the crowd towards ares as he raises his LMG. "There he is, get hi-!" the Guards pony's voice is cut off as he opens fire.

DADADADADADADA-

Guards ponies fall to the ground as they get ripped to pieces and the guards ponies just keep coming. As soon as the crowd of civilians clears, Ares tosses a grenade towards the oncoming guards. It explodes, sending some of the ponies into the air and through the windows of stores near by. Seeing what just happened, the remaining guards run away.

"Man, you guys aren't much of a fight, I probably don't even need to waste ammo on you." He hangs his rifle on his back as two guards run up to him, swords drawn. They both jump, bringing their swords down on him. He grabs them by the necks, squeezing just hard enough for them to drop their weapons. "I'm gonna have fun with you two." He throws one down and stomps on its neck, killing him instantly, before grabbing one of the dropped swords and thrusting it through the remaining pony's stomach. His screams echo off of the buildings. "AAHHHHHGGHGHGH, FUCK!"

"Huh, I didn't know you ponies knew how to cuss." said Ares as he thrust the sword farther in, twisting it and killing the pony. "Oh, dead already?" He drops the body lifeless pony to the ground before walking to the front doors of the castle.

Ares walks past pony after pony as he walks towards the doors. He notices one pony in particular, a white unicorn stallion with a blonde mane. The unicorn stares at him as he walks past. "Haven't I seen you somewhere befo-?" Asks Ares as he turns around.

"You arent fooling anypony with that ridiculous getup of yours, I know it's you. You are going to pay for taking Rarity away from me!"The stallion comes out with a knife and stabs Ares in the chest, before running to the front doors, standing in front of them before showing some form of pathetic defensive stance. "When my Aunt hears that I'm the one who killed you, she will have to make me an Alicorn!" He grins.

Ares looks at the stallion before looking down at the knife in his chest. Ares slowly reaches up and pulls it out before sighing. "I knew I had seen you from somewhere before." Ares takes the knife and flips it, holding it by the blade. "Prince Blueblood," Ares bends down with his arms outstretched. "what an honor it is to finally make your acquaintance." Prince Blueblood's smile instantly vanishes as he sees this. He turns around, hitting the door trying to get in. "Oh no you don't," Ares throws the knife into Blueblood's hoof, slicing cleanly through and sticking him to the wall. "AGHHGHGHHH!!"

"Yeah, I remember you now," Ares slowly approached Blueblood, who was now struggling to keep from crying. "I remember that you wouldn't even give my Rarity the time of day, you shunned her." Ares grabbed a knife from his chest and flipped it in his hands a few times.

"I-I did no such thing, I was just p-playing h-h-hard to get!" Yelped Blueblood through clenched teeth. Ares raised his now bloodstained yellow skull mask and gave him the biggest 'You fucking dipshit' look. "And who says she was yours, you know that if I c-called, she would have come running, she was always a whore for rich stallions." He laughed "She never loved you."

Ares lowered his mask and grabbed Blueblood's other hoof, pinning it and stabbing his knife through it. The feel of the knife breaking through flesh and bone was almost as satisfying as Blueblood's screams. Ares leaned in close to Blueblood's face and whispered into his ear. "Listen here you little shit!" Hissed Ares as he grabbed another knife from his chest, putting it up to the now sobbing stallion's throat. "Because I'm a nice guy, I'm gonna let you choose how you die." The stallion pissed himself as he sobbed, urine running down his leg.

"P-please, no..." sobbed the stallion.

Ares held up the knife to his neck. "Now, would you like me to slit your throat?"

"I-I'm sorry..."

Ares then placed the knife to his ear. "I could send this knife through your ear and into your brain, sure it would hurt more, but it would be quicker."

"Oh god..."

He then lifted the knife to his horn. "Or I could just cripple you and let you live, don't worry, your horn will be fine. I'll keep it as a trophy in my collection." At that, Blueblood, defecated on himself. Ares jumped back. "Jesus man, I thought you were grown up. It's not that hard of a decision, it's a choice between life and death."

"I can pay you a-anything you want, do you want bits?"

Ares steps back and grabs the watch on his wrist. "I'm gonna set my watch and if you haven't chosen one by the time it's at zero, I'm gonna choose for you. Aaaaaannd... there."

"Please I beg of you!"

"Nine"

"I dont wanna die!"

"Eight"

"Please!"

"Seven, you're wasting time. Six"

"Please, I don't wanna die. Ill give you anything!"

"Five"

"Have mercy!"

"Four, Now you're just wasting my time. Three."

"I can't choose... I love my horn, but I don't wanna die!"

"Two."

"Fine... I choose..."

"One"

"I choose to have my throat slit... I can't live without my horn."

Ares watch beeped. "Ohhhh...." He held up his watch, pointing at it. "Didn't choose on time, now I get to choose how you die."

"NOOO, you bastard, I beat your fucking time!" He screamed "You're going to chop off my horn." He sobbed.

"Hey hey now," Ares gently lifted up his head. "I never said that I would cut it off if you didn't answer, that was just one of your choices." He rubs the knife against his cheek, cutting it.

"Y-your choices?"

"Yeah, my choices are pretty much endless, luckily for you, I already have something dreamed up." Ares reached on his chest, grabbing a grenade. "Also, this works out for me, because I need to get through the door, which you're attached to."

At that, Ares thrust the knife into Blueblood's stomach, causing him to scream out in pain. "AAHHAHHGHGHHA-ACK!!" During his scream, Ares plugged Blueblood's scream hole with a grenade, before jumping back behind a wall.

___________________________________________________________________

The gunshots got closer as Aurik set up his defensive line. His rifle clanged against the table as he pushed it to the door. "Zhere, zat should be enough." Aurik walks back and sits down behind a turned over table. He reaches under his vest and pulls out a cross, He holds it up and whispers a small prayer before putting it back under his vest. All of a sudden the screams stop.

Muffled yelling is heard at the door. Aurik, with his rifle raised, approaches the door, ready for anything to happen.

Thud thud thud

Aurik approaches the door and reaches for it, jumping back when a knife stabs through the door. Muffled screaming ensues as Aurik notices that the knife is now dripping blood. Aurik trains his rifle on the door, ready to start shooting when he sees another knife come through, this one coming through about three feet from the other knife, caked in blood. At that point Aurik jumps behind a table and he changes his gun into an MG3 LMG. He deploys the bi-pod and kneels behind the table, mentally preparing himself for this...thing.

Another thud, followed by a scream is heard, followed by silence. Aurik lowers his head as he guesses what happens next.

BOOM

The front doors fly inward as pieces of wood and gore fly everywhere. Aurik pokes his head up and seeing that, to his horror, half of a pony's torso is laying there, it's intestines laying in a heap around the opening, blood seeping out, staining the now charred white fur of the unlucky pony. He looks slightly past the smoke and ducks down as a hail of bullets nails his cover.

Ares walks through, hip-firing an M240B. Round after round impact the table as he slowly talks towards it. When his weapon clicks, signaling Ares that his gun is empty, he lowers the gun. Aurik sees this and opens fire, his MG3 rip-roaring through the remaining pieces of wood, the buzz of his LMG giving him confidence. Ares lifts up his arm and turns to the side as the LMG tears into him, pushed back towards the wall by the repeating fire. After about 200 rounds, he falls through the wall and hits the ground, completely inert. Aurik walks towards him, his LMG lowered. As Aurik approaches, Ares' M240B vibrates, turning into a sawn off double-barreled shotgun. Ares lifts it, catching Aurik off guard as he fires a round into him, sending him flying back into a table. He gasps for air as he reaches at his vest, he lifts his hand up to see blood. How had the buckshot gotten through his vest. He felt as his breaths slowly got weaker. Ares got up and walked through the hole in the wall and approached Aurik, kneeling down beside him, lifting his mask. "Wow, those tungsten rounds really do work."

"V-Vhy D-(Cough)daniel?" Asked Aurik as he looked into Daniels eyes, life slowly draining from his body.

"Well, " Said Daniel with a smile. "I felt that you guys were hindering my plans to kill Princess Celestia." Daniel stood up and lifted his shotgun to Auriks head. "Listen kid, I have nothing against you, you were a good kid, but-" Daniel paused as he stared at the cross around Auriks neck. "I just can't have you trying to stop me, Auf Wiedersehen, German boy."

________________________________________________________________________

John ran with Celestia and Twilight and turned around a corner as he heard a final gunshot. He paused, looking back before hearing laughter, the laughter of someone who had just claimed a life. John felt sadness sweep over him as he ran towards the panic room, where Luna was sitting patiently, her head to the floor as she wept. As Celestia went over to console her, Luna slapped Celestia's hoof away and turned, submerging herself into the darkness of the room. Celestia looked down to the ground, a tear fell down her face as she started shaking. She turned to look at John, who was now barricading the wooden door. When done, he sat down against it, giving a long sigh as he cupped his face in his hands.

"What are we going to do, John?" Asked a panicked Twilight, who now had her face buried in her hooves. John looks up at her, a look of sorrow on his face.

"I don't know, Twilight. I'm so sorry." John checked his rifle ammunition. "But I know that I will never let anything hurt you." Twilight buried her head into her hooves.

Knock Knock

John jumped away from the door before it got blown from the hinges. A small burst of fire and blue enveloped everything in the room as Daniel walked in. "DANIEL, STOP!!" John raised his rifle, only to be mowed down by an MP5K. He hit the wall with a thud, before sliding down it. He hit the floor and lay there, completely still. Twilight looked at John and screamed as she ran over to him, shaking him before looking up at Daniel, a look of satisfaction on his face. Celestia backed up towards the wall, a look of petrified horror on her face as she stared at Daniel.

"You bastard, You killed my John!!" She lunged at him, only to be caught by the neck. Daniel let the MP5K hang loosely around his neck as he grabbed a blue and white combat knife, stabbing Twilight. Her screams drowned out any and all of Celestia's thoughts as she stared in horror as her star student is eviscerated in front of her. He twists the knife, causing Twilight to fall limp. He pulls the knife out, dropping Twilight's corpse to the ground and looks at Celestia, then past her. He throws the knife into the darkness. "Don't think that you are safe from your sins, Luna." Said Daniel as Luna falls to the ground, the knife sticking out of her temple. Celestia stares in horror at her now departed sister. Celestia looks up at Daniel, who is now slowly approaching her. Tears stream down her face and fall at her hoofs as she tries to get up, her legs shaking as she tries to stand. She whips her head around to throw a spell. It does nothing. She tries again and again. She sits back down as Daniel gets closer. He drops the MP5K and unholsters his Beretta, pulling the hammer back. "When I'm done with you, I will finally have my revenge." He takes the pistol and lifts it to Celestia's head as she pleads with him.

"Please, don't kill me, I swear. I can give you everything you had back." She pleads.

"No, you can never give me what I once had, you can barely even use your own magic right now." He presses the pistol to her forehead as she closes her eyes, tears streaming down her face.

"Please..."

"Say hi to your bitch and your sister for me."

He pulls the trigger.

Click

Celestia opens her eyes as Daniel starts laughing. He looks back at John's corpse who is now getting up, brushing off his jacket, red paint smearing his jacket. "Can you believe this dumb bitch?" Daniel laughs some more as John then helps Twilight and Luna up. She removes the knife from her head and drops it to the ground.

"Twilight? Luna?" Tears flow down Celestia's face as she looks at them. "H-how?"

"Paint rounds..." says John, bending down to give a crying Twilight a hug.

Daniel looks back at Celestia. "Did you really think that they would let me kill you?" He laughs.

"Daniel, we will take care of our sister." Says luna, who shows no sympathy in both her face and voice as she stares at Celestia. "She will be tried for her crimes."

"I love you John, let's please not ever do that again." says Twilight as she nuzzles John's chest. He kisses her before looking up at a disgusted Celestia.

"So... is that how they turned you against me? He made you his whore?" Said Celestia, a look of pure anger on her face.

"Celestia, ple-." Twilight started

"Thats PRINCESS Celestia to you." Screamed Celestia who lunged at Twilight, only to be tackled by her sister, Luna.

"Please sister, let us hear what she has to say!" Celestia stops struggling enough to hear Twilight.

"Please listen to me, the humans? They are not a horrible species, they may be a little brash, yes, but they are still full of compassion and love. Yet you take away the one thing he loves and still dare to call him a monster. What do you think that makes us look like?" Twilight turns around, walking with John out of the room.

"You little SLUT!!" Celestia uses her head as a weapon and hits Luna, knocking her down, before bucking Daniel into the wall and falling to the ground, unconscious. Celestia then runs at John, who turns around before being impaled and lifted into the air by her horn, his blood coating Celestia's face as she slams him to the ground.

"JOHN!!" Twilight Cries. Celestia stands over John as she rears up for her final blow, she stands on her hind legs, stretching her wings.

BANG...cling clang

Celestia looks to her left and sees Aurik, who is covered in red, holding a smoking pistol. She looks down at her chest, and falls to the floor. She slowly closes her eyes, never to reopen.

"JOHN!!" Cries Twilight as she runs over to him. "It's ok, it's gonna be ok, I love you baby, I love you, you're gonna be fine."

Luna lifts her head, rubbing it. She looks over and sees the scene outside as Daniel comes to. She raises a hoof to her mouth as a tear falls down her face, She moves over to Daniel and helps him up before walking to John and Twilight. Aurik runs toward them, dropping his gun as he falls to his knees and just stares at John.

"Please, John, don't leave me." Says Twilight as she lays her head on his chest. She slowly lifts his hand up, placing it in her lap.

"I-I love you T-Twilight." He coughs, causing blood to fly out, falling onto his jacket. He looks Twilight in the eyes before saying his final words. "T-thank you for m-making me the most h-happy human in the world." His hand drops beside him as his last breath leaves him. Twilight lays there, her head on his chest weeping as everyone surrounds him.

"JOOOOOHHN!!"

Goodbyes

The slow walk down the path to the Ponyville cemetery was the longest I had ever had. It was a small group, sure, but he never liked the idea of big and flashy, preferring to keep things simple. Humble to the last. A single carriage, with a casket cloaked in the flag of his country, escorted by his friends and brothers in arms, as they seemed to call each other, nothing more. To my left, Princess Luna, who has taken the mantle of the leading diarch, looks to me briefly before resuming her solemn march forward. She is grieving her loss too, but cannot allow it to interfere with her new duties, as I cannot allow my grief to interfere with mine. The road ahead of us will be long and rough, and paved with the sacrifice of many, starting with his, and I don't want it to be in vain.

Finally, we arrive at the gravesite, adorned with nothing more than a simple marker. Dan and Aurik, dressed in the uniforms of their respective militaries, come to a halt, before beginning their own solemn ceremony dictated by the traditions passed down from their ancestors. As they bear his casket, I can't help but think of what could have been. He may not have been immortal like myself, but we would have had a life together, and that's all that he wanted. It's all that I wanted.

I couldn't bring myself to write a speech. It hurt too much. I may not have known him for very long, but he had a profound impact on me. The lessons that he taught me, not just about friendship, but about the world around me too, I will keep with me until the end of time. Lessons about doing what is right, trust, and healing the hurt done to those who deserved it the least. Lessons that I couldn't hope to be able to write into one of my storybook friendship reports.

I watch, awestruck, as Dan and Aurik fold the flag draped over his casket into a small triangle, the red and white stripes tucked within a field of blue adorned with white stars. Dan kneels before me, and with a whisper that only I could hear:

"On behalf of the President of the United States,

The Secretary of the Army,

And a grateful nation,

Please accept this folded flag in honor of your loved one's honorable and faithful service."

Presented to me, I take it in my hooves, the only remnant of him that remains. Pulling it close to my chest, I'm unable to hold back the grief any longer, and lose myself in it.

I've since returned to my castle. Wanting to be alone, I immediately go to my chambers. There, I find on the table, rolled up with my own seal, a letter. Opening it, I can't help but sit down in shock.

Twilight,

For obvious reasons, I hope that you never have to find, much less read this letter, but if you do, than hopefully it will help you find peace in my stead. The life of a warrior is oftentimes a short and violent one. We willingly stand guard in the worst of conditions, so that those that we love can live in the best. For those of us that do make it home, we will always hear the call to go back out, and help hold the line for just one more night, one more battle, for the continued assurance of the well being of those back home. And so because of this, I ask that you not grieve for too long over my sacrifice, but find joy in the peace and freedom that it bought. Someday, we will see each other again. 'When our days become dreary with low-hovering clouds of despair, and when our nights become darker than a thousand midnights, let us remember that there is a creative force in this universe, working to pull down the gigantic mountains of evil, a power that is able to make a way out of no way and transform dark yesterdays into bright tomorrows.' -Martin Luther King, Jr.

With love,

John

"And what shall we do with these two?" a quiet voice questions, wise, older than time itself.

"One of them has failed at their task. They were meant to uphold harmony on their world, and instead flaunted their power, using it to their own advantage. Had they not done so, we would not even have this problem." states a second, more stern voice.

"Should we send forth a replacement, then?"

"No, that decision has already been made. We will see how this plays out."

"And what of the other?"

"What of the other one? They're both dead. They have both served their purpose in one way or another."

"I think not. The failed one we will keep here for now. Perhaps there is redemption. But the other, I do not believe is done yet. I will send that one back, for there is still work to be done....."

I find myself standing in a field of tall grass, stretching out as far as I could see. I don't know how long I've been here, nor do I know how to get out. A constant flow of memories assaults my mind, of feelings, names, and faces, but I can never hold on to any one of them for very long before it slips away again. I feel a presence here with me, though I can't tell who they are, but I feel compelled to follow them.....

"John?! Can you hear me?" A voice, hopeful, and strained, is calling to me. I open my eyes again, where a mulberry colored blur takes up most of my vision. As my vision starts to clear, I can make out more details of the face in front of me. I look around, looking at the charcoal coloring of my coat, the wings on my back, the shield shaped icon on my leg. Clutching at my aching head, I feel a horn protruding from my forehead. Standing beside me is someone tall, dressed all in black, looking down with a smile. I can't quite seem to place where I've seen all of this before. Memories start to trickle in, and the first one I grab onto is small, a simple name.

"Twilight?"

Just another day in paradise

"Alright guys, let's wrap it up for the day. We got a pretty nasty storm coming in, make sure everything is weighed down, I don't wanna come in tomorrow and find debris all over the place." Rob, my foreman yells to us. I stood up, back screaming in protest from being bent tying rebar all day, and take my tool belt off, glad to shed the extra weight. 'Just a few more minutes making sure everything's all secure' I think to myself.

After getting the site cleaned up, and punching out for the day, I toss my tools in the back of my truck, praying the heap of junk can make it another day for the drive home. Looking up as I navigate through traffic, I can already see a line of thunderhead clouds coming my way, directly over the highway. "Fuck, traffic is gonna suck" I grumble, flooring it to try and get ahead as much as possible and get clear of the city. I hear the engine protest, but surge forward nonetheless, so after checking for cops, setting the cruise control, and turning on some music, I settle in for the ride. Hearing nothing but screaming death metal, I didn't notice that lightning is already starting to strike around me, until my vision turns completely white, destroying all awareness of the world.

Reality fades back in, just in time to realize that I'm making a beeline for the trees on the side of the road. I can't hear anything, but I'm sure my bald ass tires aren't contributing much to traction, and the last thing I see is a sea of green, and then black.

'fuck, that's gonna leave a mark.'

"Dammit." It feels like I got hit by a freight train, and everything is all foggy. All I'm aware of at the moment is a splitting headache, and an angry buzzing in my ears as I try to remember what happened and where I am. Slowly looking up, I see my airbag in front of me, covered in a bloody impression of my face, and broken glass all around me. I'm pinned to my seat, but I can feel all my limbs, so as long as nothing catches fire I should be ok. Eventually. Gaining some of my hearing back, I listen for any signs of life around me. I'm expecting to hear sirens, voices, anything, but there are none. Just the ticking from my cooling engine. I hear footsteps rushing from behind me, and a concerned voice.

"Are you ok?"

I can't see them, but I'm relieved that someone found me.

"Yeah, I think so, I don't know for sure. I can't find my phone, can you call 911 for me?"

"Call? Who? What's a phone?" I look over, seeing a tan horse, smaller than usual, barely able to look in through my window, and oddly, wearing a stetson hat, of all things. Whatever, I can deal with a farmer dressing up their horse. I just wish she would come around front so I can talk to her though.

Then I realize that the horse is the one doing the talking.

"Who's 911?"

Wow that impact must have been a real doozy. And then the blackness returns.

"It's moving around, I think it's starting to wake up."

The first thing that I notice is a steady beeping. Oh, good, hospital. Opening my eyes, I look for what I'm assuming is either a nurse, or a doctor. Instead, I see another fucking horse, and it's neon blue, with an orange mane for some reason, wearing what looks like a lab coat. And this one talks too.

"That was quite the magical show you put on when you showed up out of nowhere in the middle of Applejack's farm. Do you have a name?"

I'm still trying to CTRL-ALT-DLT my brain into working, but this is getting to be a bit much to process. I can deal with a hallucination of a talking horse after plowing into a tree at 80 MPH, but I was under the assumption that would go away after awhile.

"You're a horse."

"Uh, actually I'm a pony, there's a difference." He deadpans.

"Ok. You're a pony. And you're talking. What in the actual fuck is going on here? Is this some wierd prank you people are pulling?"

"No. This is real, and yes, I can talk. I don't know who these 'people' are that you refer to, but you seem to be in a bit of shock. Let's start off easy. My name is Bedside Manner, I'm the doctor in charge of the ICU today. Do you remember your name?"

"John"

"Ok, that's a good start." He starts writing down notes, and I notice he's got a glowing horn in the middle of his forehead, and is somehow floating a pen and clipboard in front of him.

"Uhhhh.... What is that? And how are you doing that?"

"Doing what?"

"That thing, with that horn and the floating stuff." I'm starting to get really weirded out, and wondering what kind of drugs they have me on to be seeing this kind of shit.

"Oh, that's my magic. You're not familiar with it?"

"Negative ghostrider." More notes, a curious hum here and there. He approaches my bed, and I instinctively tense up, not knowing what to expect, though I get the feeling he means no harm. Hopefully.

"Please relax, I just want to examine you, see how you're healing is coming along. You sustained multiple fractures, and our healing magic doesn't seem to work on you for some reason."

Magic. They throw that word around like it's a normal part of life, and all it's doing is just adding confusion to this mess I'm in, but reluctantly, I try to calm down, noticing that the beeping from the monitor next to me has been slowly accelerating. He nods, and offers a comforting smile, and his horn lights up again. I feel an alarming tingling all over my body, and for some reason, I can't move. It doesn't hurt, but I still don't like it, and start to tense up again. "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?"

"Please relax, I'm sure this is new to you, but this is how unicorns do everyday tasks." A little sternly, and I notice he has to strain some to maintain whatever it is that he's doing, and two more horses... Ponies, whatever they are, come in, and try holding me down. One of them seems normal enough, but the other has wings. When they put their... Hooves? on me to try to hold me down, I come completely unglued, and somehow manage to break out of the doctor's magic field. Taking advantage of the break, I fight back.

Working in construction, I'm no stranger to a fight, and the daily grind makes me deceptively strong, despite my somewhat smaller size, and I land a solid jab on the nearest ponie's face, knocking it back and crashing into the doctor behind it. The winged one launches itself up, pulling it's hooves back in what I can only guess is a punch of its own, and I charge forward into it, tackling it, and sending both of us crashing through the glass door and into the hallway beyond.

At this point, I start hearing alarms going off, and see a crowd of multi-colored ponies looking at me in terror. Looking around, I see a door leading outside, and make a break for it, wanting nothing more than to get the hell outta this fucking freakshow.

Crashing through the door, I find myself in a city, one like I've never seen before. I've been to Boston, New York, but this wasn't like any of them. The buildings looked impossibly old, and I couldn't find any direction to go, so I just picked one and ran. I only made it about 50 feet before a much taller white pony, no, this one's a horse! But with wings, AND a horn! I kept charging at it, but instead of tackling it, I found myself stuck in another one of those funny looking magic fields, except this one was golden colored, and not so tingly. I think the proper term for this one would be painful. Really, really painful. It pulled me closer to get a good look at me, and then everything faded to black.

Oh, hello darkness, my old friend.

Author's Note

My first work.

A lesson in recklessness

"So, John, we meet again." A familiar looking, and somewhat standoffish neon blue horse approaches cautiously.

"Bedside Manner. It's been awhile." I frown, the tension is thick enough to drown in it. "Here for some payback?"

He pauses, thinking before speaking again. "Well, I was assigned to be your doctor, and as nervous as it made me, Celestia has made reassurances that you mean no harm. Still, seeing is believing."

"Yea, about that. I uh..." Damn, never thought I'd have to apologise for throwing a fist. "I'm sorry about beating you up. I'm trying to process what's going on here. I won't be doing that again."
He looks at me, skeptical. "If I examine you, will you remain calm?"

"Yes. All I ask is that you let me know what you're doing. Magic isn't unexpected anymore if that helps." I smile at him, hopefully it doesn't make me look crazy.

"I'll accept that for now." He lifts a needle. "You fuck around, and you're going to be taking a nap."

I sit up straighter, bracing for the tingling sensation. The familiar blue glow surrounds my left arm, and Bedside, looking at me, then my arm, comments on his observations.

"Your injury was strange. I've never seen anything like it. I had to remove a small piece of metal from your shoulder. For such a small object, it did horrendous damage. What was it?" He releases my arm, obviously relieved.

"Weapons are far more advanced where I'm from. The most advanced weapon I've seen here, besides magic, is spears. Since we don't have magic, we improved our weapons. The small piece of metal was called a bullet. I have a pistol that fires those. That's what Spike was holding when I got shot." I frown, wondering how Twilight and Spike are doing. Twilight might have been too drunk to remember, but Spike seemed pretty traumatized.

"So doc, when can I get outta here? I have amends to make with Spike."

He looks at me funny, then just shakes his head. "We changed our healing magic so that it can work on you. Your physiology is quite different from ours. You're fully healed now, but remember, just because we can magically heal you, doesn't mean we can magically resurrect you. So don't do anything to get yourself killed."

"M'kay doc" I chuckle at him, jumping out of bed.

"Hey Spike, how's it going?" The little green dragon jumps up, obviously lost in thought.

"Oh, hey John." He looks down at the floor, looking nervous.

"Spike, are you ok? I know you're probably hurting about what happened yesterday, but everything is fine. If anyone is to blame, it would be me. I didn't warn you that I had a weapon in there, plus I got a little buzzed. Where I'm from, mixing alcohol and weapons is frowned upon."

He looks at me, confused. "I'm not sure what it is you're talking about. I've never seen anything like that before. We should go see Twilight, she wants to speak with you. She's fairly concerned about what happened."

We head to Twilight's chambers. As Spike knocks, I realize that I recognize the guard from yesterday, he was the same one that responded to yesterday's incident. He almost looks scared.

"Enter."

Spike opens the door for me, then continues down the hall. I haven't seen Twilight's chambers yet. Despite it's size, it's amazingly simple and well organized, bookshelves going all the way to the ceiling. Twilight is laying on a cushion, reading a book.

Seeing me, she closes the book and gestures to a nearby seat. "Please, take a seat. Taking her offer, I wonder what she had to say. She sits up, looking nonplussed. "I hope you're not holding any grudges against Spike for what happened yesterday."

"No, I'm not," I frown. "I explained a little to him what happened, and I take full responsibility for it. There was no way he could have known. I should have explained to you the contents of my vehicle, and done so while sober."

She sits up while listening, adopting a more serious expression. "I wasn't able to fully recall what happened, due to my own inebriation, and I take responsibility for that. But I do recall your injuries. Judging by the wound you received, you're lucky to be alive. Though you seem to be fully aware of this already, am I correct?"

"Yes. Where I come from, it's quite common for everyday people to possess a weapon such as that. Some of it is done illegally, but for the most part there is no law against it. We know what they are capable of, and we have them for our own protection. My race, as a general rule of thumb, is capable of great violence."

She looks down, ears held flat. "I've seen some of what your kind is capable of. We have no place for that here. We strive for peace, and I hope that you would be willing to do the same. I can understand your desire to protect yourself in your own world, but Equestria is my world, so for the time being, your weapon has been taken into my custody for study, and for everyone's safety."

Damn. Not exactly a good impression to make on them. Getting my pistol taken sucks, but she makes it sound temporary.

"I suppose I could work with that. When you took it, did you do anything with it?"

"No." She shakes her head. "Is it dangerous?"

"Not on it's own. But if someone fiddled around with it, someone else might get shot, and they might not be so lucky. I need to unload it. Once that's done it's nothing more than a really expensive paperweight. At the same time, I can teach you about it, along with the nature of it's use."

She looks at me thoughtfully, nods, and opens a drawer, lifting the gun out with her magic likes it's a ticking timebomb.

I take it from her, unload it, and show her the various parts and how they all function together. She's obviously amazed that it doesn't rely on magic to function.

"So these little metal rocks that you put into it are the real danger? How can something so small cause so much damage?"

"This is where it gets ugly Twilight. My kind has been making these for hundreds of years, in various forms. We as a species are constantly fighting each other, often over trivial things such as fuel, or land, or even a perceived insult. There's always been a race to have the better weapon, ever since the first fight where someone picked up a rock and used it to smash someone else's head in. After that, someone made clubs, spears, bows and arrows, until finally, you have this." I look at her gravely. Shes starting to realize that my fight with the doctor was nothing compared to what people in general can be capable of.

"This isn't even our most powerful weapon. This is a small fry compared to other weapons, like our bombs. About 70 years ago, someone decided to go and drop a couple bombs that leveled two cities. All that to end the bloodiest war in human history." I look up, realizing I had gotten lost in my own monologue. Twilight is visibly shaken, ears laid back flat against her head.

"What caused that war?" She quietly asks.

"Hatred. It's what causes all wars. We claim to fight to protect our loved ones, but deep down, in the darkest part of our hearts, it's all because of hate."

A single tear rolls down Twilight's cheek, and she lays back down, putting her head down on her forelegs. I never realized how empathetic these ponies can be. I close the distance, putting a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Twilight, while the vast majority of my people are like this, there are many who are like you, whose only desire is peace. I will never let the violence and hatred of my world come to pass here. I give you my word on that."

She looks up. "Pinkie Promise?"

"Um...."

"Here, I'll show you." And she walks me through the motions, and somehow I end up hitting myself in the eye.

"You're gonna have to explain that one to me." Not knowing what else to do, I gently hug her. She wasn't expecting me to be so warm to her, but she relented.

"Maybe we could find something a little lighter to talk about. Did you happen to find a small, flat black object in my truck?"

"Yea, I did, why?" She levitates my phone up.

"Well, I'm going to show you one of the better things that my people have come up with. We call it a movie."

After the movie, some light romantic comedy that my ex-girlfriend had, she seemed to be in better spirits, though she didn't understand some of the jokes. We had a light dinner, and I decided to show them the wonders of pizza.

"I'm not gonna lie John, this 'pizza' is pretty good." Twilight grins.

"It originally comes from a country called Italy. I'm a big fan of various cheeses and pasta, I'll have to show you some more of their foods. Most of it is based around tomatoes and pasta. It's also very vegetarian friendly."

Spike looks at the remaining slices, picks one up, and shoots green fire at it. "Let's see what Princess Celestia thinks of it." He says with a grin.

"Well, we will have to see tomorrow. She has summoned the three of us to see her. The chariot leaves first thing in the morning."