345 days of hell...

“This must be it...i think?” questioned a yellow colt Pegasus with a black mane as he stare at the large tree house “Funny. I never knew ponyville had a library.”

the colt entered the library and soon saw a purple unicorn. She was reading a book and writing something down as she turned the page.

“Hello?” said the colt as he walk up to her.

The purple unicorn quickly turned around and was surprised to see a colt here. Matter of fact, she was very surprised to see one of the town ponies here at all.

“You're lost?” answered the unicorn as she rose a eyebrow.

“This is the town's library....” he slowly look around the room and saw the row's of books and knew this has to be the library or somepony needs to get out more or least get laid “...right?”

Suddenly, there was silence between the two.  The colt lower his ears in fear as the purple unicorn had the biggest smile he ever saw and it was creeping him out. Soon, stars appear in the mares eyes as she rubbed her hooves together.

“YES! *cough* I mean yes. This is the library. How...wait, hold on!” quickly said the mare as she dash off into the closet and soon returning with table and a box. With her magic, she set up the table and opened the box.

“Okay! How can I, Twilight Sparkle, help you?” smiled Twilight as reading glasses lower onto her face with her magic.

The colt rubbed back of his neck and answered “I want to check out a book ca-” but before he could finish, Twilight took out a pile of paper from the box and place it in front of the colt and said “In order to check out a books, you must fill out this form. This form will allow you to get *giggle* a library card! The fee is just five bits. Ten bits in order to get a other one, if you happen to misplace it or had it stolen. So, just sign here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, there, over here, down there, way over here, behind here, 360 turn over here, 90 turn on the left side, you think here but its really over here and up there and back down there and right here, see this? sign there three times, close one eye and sign there, count to ten and then sign here, don't forget here and here and here and there and now drink this and sign here, eat this and collect all the rings and run through that loop and run pass that sign post and then sign here, spin around four times and sign backwards and then sign in binary code and sign where the x is and sign here and re-sign it!” smiled Twilight.

“...”

Twilight notices something was wrong as the colt was scratching his head “Do I need to explain again?”

“Nononono...its...well...all that, for the first place?” replied the colt as he took the pen that Twilight handed him.

Twilight scan all 25 pages of the library card form and gave a weak smile as she place the 24 pages back into the box “One page is fine Mr...”

“Raynor.” answered the colt as he finish signing the paper.

Twilight took the form and check it and place it back into the box and took out the card and wrote down Raynor's name and hand it to him.

“Thanks. Now about the book I wanted to check out.”

“Oh yes! What book are you looking for? Adventure? Romance?” ask Twilight as she summon a few books with her magic.

“None of those. Just a book on pregnancy. That's all.”

All the books that Twilight summoned with her magic, quickly fell to the ground as Twilight was surprised and happy. “Oh Celestia! Is your wife or marefriend going to have a foal!?”

“Yes. My wife...well going to be my wife soon, is pregnant and I just want a book on this, so I can learn what will happen in the upcoming months.”

“Then here!” spoke Twilight as she summoned a small blue book “This book should help. It's called “Pregnancy 101 for Males” by Doctor PinkHeart. She written a lot of books on this subject. Wish to check it out?”

Raynor nodded and Twilight check out the book for him. As Raynor left, he started to read it out loud “Prologue? Why is there a prologue?” he stop and read on “You should have worn a condom and now there no turning back you poor fool” said Raynor out loud “...huh? Why?”