"Bright Mac let out a ghastly fart..."
Bright Mac stumbled into his house. His body was covered in dirt and sweat from the long days’ work. It was hard, grueling work, but it was honest work. And he loved it.
However, there was one thing he loved more than his job, and that was enjoying a nice, refreshing, ice cold beer when he was done.
“Honey, I’m home,” he shouted aloud. “Where’s my favorite mare at?”
His wife, Pear Butter walked in the room. “I find it hilarious that you say that every day, even though you technically never leave home in the first place.”
Bright Mac chuckled. “I’m sorry, but I can’t really call the fields home if you’re not out there with me. Home is where the heart is or so they say, and my heart is standing right here in front of me.”
Pear Butter chuckled and planted a kiss on his cheek. “I love it when you say corny lines like that. I love you, baby.”
“Love you, too, hun.” Bright Mack went over and fell back into his favorite chair. “Honey, if you really love me, you know exactly what I need right now, I bet.”
“I think I do,” she said, playfully rubbing her chin. “I think you need a beer. Am I in the ballpark?”
“Yes you are,” he replied. “And this is why I married you.”
“Just a minute, hun,” she said, walking toward the kitchen. “I have something special for you, today.”
“Something special?”
“Yep,” she said. She quickly returned from the kitchen with a bottle of beer. “This is homemade beer from my cousin, Pear Pressure. She prepared a bottle just for you.”
Bright Mac’s eyes lit up and his eyes widened as he laid his eyes upon the beautiful sight before him. It was already opened with the foam spilling down the side of the bottle. He had never witnessed a more beautiful sight in all his years existing on the planet.
“Honey, thank you so much. And make sure to send my regards to your cousin as well.” She handed him the bottle which he quickly took a huge gulp.
It had a strange taste about it. A mixture of tart fruits, bitter hops and a bit of… saltiness?
It was good, however, so it didn’t take long for him to polish off the rest of the bottle.
“Honey?” he shouted. “Did your cousin say anything about the ingredients? It was very good.”
“I’m not sure, hun,” she yelled back. “She just said it was specially crafted for you.”
Bright Mac shrugged and was about to reply, but that was when it happened. An insane gurgling began from his stomach and traveled to his intestines. It almost felt like he was about to explode from something going on inside him. The sheer pain alone caused him to hurl his bottle across the room, where it proceeded to slam into the back of his wife’s head and shatter into several pieces. The mare fell to the floor with a thud, unconscious and unaware of what was about to happen as Bright Mac fell out of his chair.
Unable to come to her aid, Bright Mac let out a ghastly fart, one that would likely have suffocated his wife anyways. It was the kind of smell that would waft through the air for days on end, much like a mustard gas explosion, making the area uninhabitable to all but the hardiest of creatures. The smell was bad enough, but it was simply precursor for the worst yet to come.
With a sound rivalling that of a thousand cannons being fired at once, his anal cavity began expelling its contents in a thick spray, coating the walls like paint on a hot summer day as he laid face down on the floor. His nearby wife wasn’t spared, either, her well-trimmed coat getting a nice fudgy finish as he fired out a gatling gun of goopy feces.
Before long, the shit that had been liquidy was now turning quite hard, and an especially large block of poo lodged itself firmly in his sphincter, acting as a plug of sorts as more and more liquidy diarrhea began to build up behind it. Bright Mac knew that this turd was far too colossal to squeeze through his tight virgin plothole, but the goopy mess pushing against it had other plans, finally forcing it free at the expense of the poor farmer’s asshole.
With a tear that sent jolts of pain through his body, his sphincter ripped open, blood beginning to mix with the massive amounts of diarrhea escaping his newly prolapsed anus. The stench of his ripe anal prolapse caused him to vomit, and he found himself choking a bit on the chunks being expelled from his stomach. All the while, his house was beginning to flood from the sheer amount of waste leaving his body.
As the brown menace began to rise up, his unconscious wife was unable to do anything but try to breathe in the gooey gunk, and began to suffocate. Bright could do nothing but watch as his beloved mare finally ceased her labored attempts at breathing, succumbing to her husband’s shit flooding her lungs.
It wasn’t long before he, too, fell victim to the rising tide of crap that eventually flooded his entire home and more, a few acres of property being coated in thick, crusty feces.
It had been a few days since the Apple Family Farmstead had been victimized by Bright Mac’s anal explosion. Many authorities had been dispatched to help with the cleanup and revitalization of the property, none higher than Princess Celestia herself. She had been made aware of the incident through a letter from Mayor Mare detailing exactly what had happened.
She hadn’t come to help, though. No, her intentions were far more sinister. She had been experimenting recently, trying to find a way to increase her well-known immortality. One of her attempts had involved three fetuses stolen from an abortion clinic in Canterlot, but they had not been nearly good enough for her to use.
The Apple Family Farmstead would be a fine spot to dump the fetuses now. Disposing of them in a massive pool of shit would ensure that they were never discovered. And so, with a trio of plops, she left them to their fate, flapping her wings to quickly flee the scene.
Little did she know, Bright Mac’s shit had properties unheard of for any normal dumping of the ass. Within a few months, the fetuses had absorbed enough of his shit to develop into fully grown newborn ponies, albeit at different times.
Their discovery by none other than Granny Smith led to them being declared as Apples, and their names would come to be Big Mac, Applejack, and Apple Bloom.
The End.
