Ponyville Bar Nights

by Fedairkid

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Slice of Life
Length: 2517

This story follows Daiquiri´s experiences as a bartender in Ponyville´s most famous (and only) bar "the tipsy pegasus".

As a Bartender at her father´s bar, "the tipsy pegasus", Daiquiri is rather well known and liked among Ponyville´s citizens and they will often talk to her about anything they usually keep to themselves or drag her into all kinds of mischief (blame it on the booze). This story will depict Daiquiri as she performs all the other jobs that come with beeing a bartender. Be it acting as a good friend, counselor or partner in crime for all kinds of shenanigans.

Every chapter is a different short story on it´s own, and i currently have no plans of implementing a big storyline that weaves throughout all the chapters and instead keep the connection between chapters to little references.

Hope you enjoy and feel free to leave compliments or criticism.

EDIT: This story was created while i was in a rather, well, compromising condition. I have come to realize that i am rather dissatisfied with it and that comedy isn´t a genre i enjoy writing, so this story project is cancelled

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2017-07-08 05:00:06 UTC

Chapter 1

The veil of night had set itself upon Ponyville. During daytime every road in town would be filled with ponys going about their daily business, haggling at the marketplace, running errands or foals spending the day playing outside with much joy in their hearts which, much to the dismay of some citizens, is reflected in the sheer volume of their laughter filling the streets.

Once the sun set and the sky was alit with stars however, the streets were void of any life and apart from some ambient noise, there was almost nothing to be heard. It was as if the whole town died once it´s inhabitants leave the streets. The whole town except for one corner that is.

Near the town hall was a neat little establishment, a bar to be precise. A welcoming and warming light was shining from the windows and onto the walkway infront of it and above the door a small metal frame protruded, carrying a sign made of rugged looking wood with the insignia "the tipsy pegasus" engraved on it. From inside, muffled sounds could be heard ranging from hearty laughter to drunken, not quite recognizable speech. Especially in contrast to the bleak picture the rest of the town was during this time of the day, the bar had a very inviting charm to it.

Inside, it looked as one would expect. Plenty of tables with chairs surrounding it were placed in the roomy hall, most of them occupied. Somewhat near to the entrance and right beside the wall the counter was located. On the wall behind it, a wooden shelf filled with all kinds of bottles and barrels could be seen.

Between the two stood a female unicorn who used her magic to levitate a towel and a glass, one used to clean the other.
Her coat was of a brown hue with just a little bit of red mixed in. Her mane, while not overly long, wasn´t cut short either and was loosely hanging around her head with some strands of hair falling over her right eye. The mark on her flank resembled~~, you guessed it,~~ a daiquiri. A drink that had alot of meaning for her parents, as they first met through a mutual friend and ended up crashing at what used to be her father´s place after both having a few too many of that particular beverage.

There were currently no customers sitting at the counter, as they were all sitting and chatting with their friends and/or family, and for that an actual table was very much preferable. So the bartender decided to entertain herself by looking around the place and seeing what her customers, most of which she could consider good aquaintences by now with some of the regular visitors having become really close friends with her over the years, were up to.

Minuette, Lyra, Lemonhearts, Twinkleshine and Moon Dancer sat around a table and were laughing over a story that apparently dealt with Lemonheart´s latest goofup while planning for an event in the canterlot palace. That group came together in Ponyville every now and then and when they did, they almost always spend an evening in here. Moon Dancer is a rather new addition though.

Another table was occupied by Doctor Hooves and Derpy. He was passionately telling her about the newest scientific discovery he made, but while the grey mare pretended to listen, it was rather obvious that she was just staring at him while daydreaming about.... other activities those to could do together.
"honestly it´s ridicilous that he hasn´t caught on to her affections yet, i thought only protagonists of those animated shows could be that oblivious. I will have to do something about that someday" Daiquiri thought to herself.
"Then again, it´s even more ridicilous that he believes she could actually understand any of that sci-fi gibberish he keeps putting out." She couldn´t blame that on the pegasus though, aside from princess Twilight and her former pupil Starlight nopony in town was able to follow his equations and theorys and whatnot.

Daiquiri intended to take some closer looks on more of the small groups of ponys that together made up the happy crowd of customers, however her attention was shifted to the door as she noticed it opening. Through it, a white, female unicorn with hair that alternated between two different shades of blue entered the bar and with a happy expression loudly said

"Alright everypony, the fun can start because Vinyl is IN THE HOUSE!"

Awkward silence took over as everypony cut of their conversations and stared at the new arrival. Considering that most had been in here for several hours already the fun had already started for most, and apparently nopony had been waiting for the DJ either. After a few seconds, the staring had stopped and everything that had been interrupted resumed with nopony paying the white unicorn another thought.

Vinyl just shrugged and went straight for the counter, the door falling in it´s hinges behind her.
Daiquiri washappy to see her, and that wasn´t only because that pony´s alcohol tolerance was quite impressive, meaning that her visits often resulted in rather generous paychecks, no.
Vinyl was a rather regular customer and therefore, she and the bartender had become good friends over the years.
Daiquiri was also a huge fan of Vinyl´s music.
Once ~~Nowacking~~ the Dj reached the counter she threw herself onto one of the stools and greeted her friend with a very upbeat voice and a smile on her face.

"Hey there, Daiquiri."

"Hey Vinyl, well, you sure seem to be in a good mood. What gives?"

Vinyl rested her foreleg´s on the counter while replying in a voice that very obviously desperately tried to sound cool and casual, though her beaming eyes gave away the mare´s excitement.

"Well, i returned from manehattan a few hours ago. You know, i played my music on a party there, quite a good one actually. Lots of ponys came and the other Dj´s were pretty chill too, anyway, that´s not important. What´s important is that one of the partygoers was actually an eventplanner himself. A really big fish in the scene to be precise. He heard my music and apparently enjoyed it so much that he wants me to play in his future events!"

"That´s awesome!"

"I KNOW! This is a huge oportunity for me to really make it big you know. And to celebrate this sucess, i came here to share a few drinks with you, so pour us some liquor will you?"

Daiquiri got to work, one of her best friends making such a progress deserved only the best of the best, so top shelf it was. She grabbed a few bottles and started to mix their contents together until two drinks, the liquid beeing a vibrant orange, stood between the two ponies, with plenty of reserve to spare beeing kept in close proximity.

Both Unicorns took levitational hold of their drinks.

"cheers!"

--------------------------------------------- a few hours later --------------------------------------------------

Vinyl lowered her glass and continued her story.

" Anyway, that guy was totally trying to hit on her, despite lilac rose very obviously not beeing interested in the slightest. After a few minutes of cheesy and downright ridicilous pick up lines, some other stallion randomly walked up to those two and poured his drink all over the dude´s face and proceeded to apologize for his little brothers behaviour before dragging him out of the club. Man the look on his face was priceless!"

She was slurring her words and the volume was slightly louder than it should be.

Daiquiri chuckled. Over the years as a female bartender she had learned just how annoying persistent guys with bad pick up lines can be, so this amused her greatly. She intended to reply but was interrupted by a blue coated stallion addressing her and her friend.

" Girls, i hate to stop your fun, but it´s become very late. Both guests and other staff members already headed home and i would really like to close up now..."

Daiquiri nodded.

"Alright Dad, we´re gonna leave. I´ll lock the door from outside, so you can head upstairs already."

The upper floors of the building served as the living space for daiquiri´s parents. She herself had moved out a while ago and bought a small cottage on the town´s outskirts. She liked the feeling of independence living on her own gave her.
Her father nodded in response and vanished through a door that led to the stairs.
Daiquiri got up from her chair and got busy stowing away the empty bottles left on the counter by Vinyl and her. Most of their contents was consumed by the Dj, but she had enough to feel lightheaded and noticed a slight sway in her step.
After the cleanup was done, she headed outside and the cold air took her by suprise. After Vinyl left the building aswell, she quickly locked the door shut and turned towards Vinyl.

" Well it sure was great seeing you again. Since you´re back in Ponyville now, we should meet up these days."

Vinyl nodded in agreement, though the movement went through her whole body as she swayed from side to side while idling. Both Ponys shared a brief hug and then went about their ways home , but when daiquiri turned around she saw Vinyl walking a very crooked line and strafing against the walls around her.

" Actually Vinyl, i´m gonna follow you home. You know, just as a safety measure."

The only response she got was a smile.

...

Most of the way to Vinyls home went by eventlessly, though they did encounter a few obstacles, if you want to call them that. Namely, Vinyl had trouble navigating around a mailbox, making multiple roundabouts before giving up and breaking into tears while mumbliing something about sleeping on the street because this mean box of doom wouldn´t want to let her pass. That nonsense resided pretty quickly after daiquiri dragged her friend away from the box and on the right path though.

A while later Daiquiri sighed in content and though to herself.

" Alright, it´s only a few hundred meters left now and it´s a straight road. We got to this point without casualties, nothing bad could happen now. This worked out better than i expected--"

Her train of thought was interrupted by a loud plonk behind her and a Dj unicorn that angrily started shouting.

" Hey, watch where you´re going. Don´t just bump into another pony you hear me!?!"

As Daiquiri looked behind her to see what happened, she saw her friend Vinyl beeing visibly upset and screaming at....some metal. Oh dear.

" Vinyl, Vinyl stop shouting."

The unicorn in question turned around.

"What?"

"Vinyl, give it up, you´re shouting at a lamp pole...."

"Hey, now i know that the fact that he is apparently unable to walk straight doesn´t exactly speak for him, but don´t you think calling him a lamp pole is going a bit far? He is a pony just like you and me after all..."

That was quite ironic considering that Vinyl was swaying as much as a kayak in a deep sea storm.

" No, i mean you are LITERALLY shouting at a lamp pole."

Vinyl blinked in confusion before looking at the target of her anger.

" Oh..."

Her expression turned back to an angry one rather quickly though.

" Well, i mean-.. you know then this is the government´s fault. I mean there are just too many lamp posts. Is that what they spend our tax money on? It´s like they strategically place such a high amount of those to ensure we bump into them for their amusement."

The underside of Daiquiri´s hoof met her forehead at a pace faster than Rainbow Dash could ever hope to fly at.
However, as the two friends continued on their way, Vinyl had no intentions of dropping the subject.

" I think i might be onto something here Daiquiri. If many ponys bumo into those posts, many are bound to hurt themselves while doing it. And then those ponys have to go to the hospital. And then those hospitals make more money. And then they give part of that money to the government to repay them for influctuating their income. IT´S ALL ONE BIG CONSPIRACY!"

"Vinyl?"

"What?"

"I don´t think that´s how Celestia rules this land..."

" What if she was kept in the dark? OH MY GOD DAIQUIRI. We have to report this immediately. She will reward us with medals if we reveal the evil scheme´s made behind her back. And then that would mean even more promotion for my--"

Her rambling was cut off by her friend´s sighing.

"Listen, Vinyl. You are ridicilously drunk. I mean you can´t walk even remotely straight. Still, we somehow managed to finally reach your doorstep. Now please just let us get inside, i can assure you there are no conspiracies involving lamp posts, of all things."

" Eh, whatever. I will ask for an audience with the princess, and you will feel all kinds of silly when i get my medal."

Vinyl sticked out her tongue at Daiquiri for good measure, and then handed the key to her house to her friend since she wouldn´t hit the keyhole anyway. Once inside, Daiquiri shoved her friend immediatly towards the bed. She heard a light ping on the way and feared that she knocked over a vase or something, but since nothing of the sort was visible she determined that no further investigation was required. Once they reached Vinyl´s bed, she proceeded to throw her friend onto it.

" Alright, time for you to sleep."

In response, Vinyl´s eyes suddenly took on a seductive glint.

" Awwww, won´t you join me?."

And for the second time that night, Daiquiri´s hoof broke the sound barrier and hit her forehead, garantied to leave a mark.

" Seriously!?! You have been chasing after that roomate of yours, who luckily is in Canterlot right now, since forever. And i´m not even into mares, i think. Furthermore---"

Her speech was interrupted by a very loud and unappealing snore. Daiquiri smiled, finally this was over. She levitated Vinyl´s keys onto a nearby table and left the building, doing her best to stay quiet.
Once outside, she leaned on the door and sighed contently.

"Phew, now i can finally get home myself, i really need to hit the hay."

The walk home was alot easier without dragging an overly intoxicated friend behind her, still the sun was already beginning to peek out at the horizon once she did make it there. Now she only needed to open her door with her...keys.
She didnt have them on her. Daiquiri frantically searched, but they were nowhere to be found and it began to dawn on her what that sound in Vinyl´s house was. She dropped them. Vinyl would be out form the rest of the day, no way to wake her up. She was locked out.

" OH BUCK IT!"