Shifting light

by Lucaridis

Rating: mature
Tags: Main 6, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Adventure, Sex, Gore, Screwball, Princess Celestia, Dark, Alternate Universe, Human
Length: 69399

After a man dies he gets sent to Equestria with power of his own choosing.

Chris Licht, a rather enthusiastic man, unfortunately passes on at the age of 24 but rather than going to hell as he should have some God offers him a deal "I'll give you superpowers and you get to fuck about. It'll be funny either way, hope you don't mind making friends." and so, with the powers of people from different types of media he sets off on a quest to not get killed as the world he is in, is a bit less friendly than it seems.

All the ponies are humanized.
Expect foul language, possible puns and a few sex jokes and references.

Co-Author Silent Slender (P.S Its me Slendy, just thought I'd make it obvious who's helping!)

Published 2017-07-06 03:10:05 UTC
Last updated 2022-07-01 20:04:12 UTC

I'm combat ready

Author's Note

I get the feeling I could have described the mane 6 better. If you feel like it just imagine them as your own human version of them.
Next chapter we might find out what are main character looks like.
Mabye sometime in the future we will even find out why he's such a dick aswell.

I'm combat ready

"So this is Ponyville. I assume it looks better without the fire and destruction." I say to Srew Ball who is standing beside me with the most depressed expression ever.

"...Yeah. You're not a very nice person, are you?" She asks me with a hint of worry. Probably thinks i'm going to destroy the place.

"It's a matter of perspective." I tell her before adding "You may want to stay here. The forecast predicts rain, Crimson rain." and with that statement I jog forward toward the villige while trying to come up with a speech to give to these diamond dogs.

Upon entering the village I notice that no one is around but there is a strong scent near the middle of the village and it smells like Earth and shit so assume it's the diamond dogs.

After a minute of sprinting through ponyville, thank God and or blacklight for infinite stamina, I see what is happening. There seems to be a few hundred, brightly coloured people all gathered in the middle of a market and they are all surrounded by the ugliest creatures in existence, in human standards anyway, until I realised thst they are human aswell.

In the middle of them though, is some sort of demon creature. It's hard to tell because it's wearing a cloak but I can see horns coming from underneath it and the claws it has for hands. Since it's obviously the leader of this attack, I pull out Jackal, aim for the back of its head and pull the trigger only for some retard dog to walk in the bullets path. He was dealt a swift and bloody punishment as his brains sprayed all over the ground and his boss.

Every single one of the dogs lost their shit at that, although their boss was shouting orders, trying to regain control, unsuccessfully at that. Since it's a little sad to watch them fumble around like a shit ton of rabid animals I decide it's time to step in.

"Hail friends. How can I kill you today. Bullets, fire, lightning, void or maybe you want to be eaten. The last one sounds fun." My entrance gained the attention of the guy in charge and a quite a few of the dogs.

"Who! Are! You!" the guy says, definitely a guy by the voice. Sound like sandpaper having sex while doped up on helium.

"I'm the man who's going to fuck you to death." I tell him, getting a really weird look from him. Don't see what the problem is, it happened to the Canadian president so why not this guy.

"Enough of this! Diamond dogs... Kill that man!" and like world war fuckin' Z I'm rushed by a horde of animals.

So I run at them as well and as I reach a few metres in front of them I activate fist of havoc. Coating myself in lethal electricity, lunge forward and smash into the ground, fists first sending a shockwave of lightening death forward, incinerating the dogs at the front. With this display of power they all stop charging me. But I don't. Still charged like a true striker I shoulder charge the closest dog and him and five of the people behind him meet their end. Seeing that they don't have a change a winning with me covered in Arc they back away. Noticing this, I stomp the ground causing an area of effect storm surge killing off the first few rows of the dogs at the cost of the super to end.

The dogs see this and they run forward again like a shit smelling, horde of Leroy Jenkins. Not being one to disapoint I charge again and punch the first one to take a swing through the face instantly consuming him. This scares the shit out of most of them, giving me an opportunity to draw Jackal and Casull and start shredding into them.

For the next minute or two all you can hear are the screams of the damned and blood and gore flying everywhere. The whole thing was beyond terrifying... For the dogs anyway, I was having the time of my life. All the blood I stood on was being drawn into my body through my feet invigorating me with even more strength than I already have.

After I stop shooting I can feel quite a bit drained thanks to the continuous fire I was placing the dogs under. As I look around I see that there are barely any dogs left, if they started at five hundred there was at least four hundred or more casualties, fatalities or not.

The man in charge notices me slouching and seems to believe that in my tired state he can beat me because he is walking forward with this smug ass expression on his face.

"If you give up now I can promise you a quick death. So why don't you just stop." If I was anyone else, I might have charged forward to try and kill him, but had an idea.

"Counter offer. You an' me, one-on-one, No weapons. If you win, you can do whatever you were going to do and if I win I can kill you all. sound fair?" I tell him and from his face I can see he is considering the proposition.

"Alright. But don't be upset when I kill you." at that I smile.

"Same to you. By the way, magic is acceptable." As a suprise he holds out his hand for a handshake. Which I comply with. A deals needs a seal and I'm not kissing the guy.

Both of us walk away from eachother, roughly ten paces then turn around to face each other. He removes his cloak letting me see what he looks like.

He, as I expected, looks like a demon. Standing around six feet tall with grayish skin and onyx horns emerging from his head. He has blood red eyes with white irises. He is wearing a gladiatorial outfit. Bare chested with a metal shoulder plate on his left shoulder, leather straps keeping it on him. A studded leather kilt was firmly attached to his waist and from what I remember of the Scottish I laugh a little as you apparently go commando when wearing a kilt. Finally, he had fairly plain sandals.

"Do we count to three or..?" I say drawing off at the end to see what he wants.

"Down from three."

3!
2!
1!

And with that we charge eachother. I slide towards him with the intent of kicking his knees in dying light style but he jumps over me and his momentum and the blood soaked ground don't agree with him and he slipped on his ass.

Seeing the opportunity I get back to my feet and run for him again, with the ground being damaged because of my heavy footfalls, and when I get to him I try to curb stomp the guy in the face but he rolls out of the way in time for my to crush to dirt Road beneath me. He doesn't dodgge unscathed however as I use earth bending to raise a pillar get him in the solar plexus and sends him flying back to where we started.

Looking around I see the crowd of prisoners looking at me in awe and the diamond dogs looking in fear.

With my momentary distraction the demon gets a hit off on my by clawing my chest. The wound is superficial as ever since I acquired dermal armour i've kept some of it active, just under the skin and since no biomass was lost in the attack I felt no pain either.

My lack of reaction suprised him enough to be able to give him a strong punch to the throat sending him flying backwards, grasping his throat, gaging and coughing up blood. With him lying on his back I walk forward until I'm above him, looking him in the eye and I can see the fear. If he could speak he might of been begging but I doubt I'll find out. Wishing to show the man the error of his ways I place foot on his chest and start applying pressure.

I look at him under me. Struggling like a worm, trying to lift my foot off of him bit the more he tries the faster I press down. Another few seconds and I feel and hear his ribcage breaking and he immediately starts to cough up blood since his lunges were likely punctured. Knowing i've won I stare around at the town seeing that I have be actively cleaning it by absorbing the blood. I look at the crowd and see staring in shock, probably not expecting me to collapse the guys ribs.

I look back the demon and remove my foot from his chest. I decide to give the man peace of mind by stomping on him head and consuming him. Oh boy, the pain from that was... Unfun.

In a dark cave there is a large red light in the middle of it and it is constantly pulsing like a heart beat. To my immense suprise a voice calls out.

"Go to Ponyville and kill the Elements of harmony and everyone else who stands in your way." it says in a cold but feminine tone and getting right to the point

"Of course, anything you say." I tell her without hesitation.

"There is a diamond dog clan near the villiage, they have been recently wronged by the elements. Gaining their assistance won't be too hard as long as you say the right things.

"I will leave at once." I say, getting excited about the prospect of a slaughter.

"Remember, don't fail."

Well that wasn't unnerving, ah well, not my problem. With the pain if the memory infusion fading away I open my eyes only be greeted with a towns worth of people staring at me. Turning away I see the remaining the dogs running for the hills.

All of a sudden my ears are greeted with clapping and I see everyone from the village looking at me with smile and the occasional cheer, honestly it looks like they're going to burst out in song, which would be freaky, but not unwelcome. I feel like I should say something to them.

"Thanks for the applause but I'd appreciate you stoping know. I know you're all happy you're not dead an' stuff but really I just did what any other person with my capabilities would do." Judging from the fact it's geeting quieter I'm guessing they heard me. I probably shouldn't tell them I was testing myself rather than saving them.

"You actually did it!" Says a familiar voice from behind me and as expected Screw Ball is there with a massive smile that practically radiated sunlight

"Yeah, I did. I guess I'm pretty cool." Rather than replying she runs up and hugs me. She can't see it but my face is twisted into a grimace. "Okay... Child, let us end this contact." I tell her, lifting her up and setting her down a few feet from me. She give a small pout but goes back to smiling.

"Ahem, excuse me." I turn around to see the girls from the manticores memory.

The first girl had dark blue or purple hair with a magenta and hot pink streaks going through it, she has lavender eyes and pale skin. She seems to be wearing some form of personalised school uniform, it's mainly lavender in colour with black patterns going across her jumper, her dress shirt underneath it was plain white. Her skirt was black with a purple stsrburst.

The next girl gave the stereotypical farm girl. She had long blonde hair tied in a ponytail, green eyes and tan skin. She a had a red, Short sleeved flannel shirt showing her muscular build and a tattoo of three apples. She had denim shorts and a pair of boots.

After her was a rainbow haired girl with reddish almost purple eyes. She had a tank top on that shown her tattoo of a cloud shooting tri-coloured lightening. She was wearing sports pants that ended half way down her calf and some running shoes. She way also flying with cyan coloured wings.

After her was a smartly dressed woman. She had long, curly purple hair that had to have taken hours to prepare and two blue orbs for eyes. She had an dress shirt with the first couple of buttons undone that was tucked into a constrsaining skirt that ended right below her knees with a trio of diamonds on it and on her feet were a pair of hight heels, she also had basic black stalkimgs.

The next girl looks ready to explode. She had incredibly poofy and curly pink hair, baby blue eyes and fair skin. She was wearing a blue shirt that said 'SMILE' in big yellow letters. She had a short yellow skirt with tree balloons stitched into it. For shoes she, like Screw Ball, had high tops athough these ones were pink.

The next girl was had long, silky pink hair with bright blue eyes. She was wearing a yellow, turtle neck jumper with three butterflies stitched into it ovee her right breast. On her back I could tell that she has two yellow wings. She had green jeans and blue shoes that seemed to be decorated with little animals.

"Yes?" I say to the purple one that acquired my attention.

"We would like to thank you for saving Ponyville." Oh, thats nice, I guess. Don't really care about her thanks though

"Suuure... Anything else or can I go now?" she seems upset with my lack of fucks but quickly returns to smiling

"I'm Twilight Sparkle." I could have guessed, she looks like her pony version so there was only so many things she could have been called aside from changeling.

"mmgh, hi. Chris Licht. A pleasure killing for the sake of your town." I tell her and while it may have sounded sarcastic it was the honest truth. Probably wouldn't like that answer though.

"We're trying to thank you, you don't need to be so moody about it." says Rainbow Dash, if memory serves my correctly. I can tell I don't like her already.

"Sorry, not used to being thanked for murder." I tell her with a smirk which seems to bother her more than it should or less given the context of what I said. "You're welcome, I suppose. Anything else I should kill while I'm here. Your worst enemy, best friend, orphanage or a hospital, it's all the same to me." Now that drew reactions from everyone and most if the were shocked and or scared.

"W-well, I was hoping to ask a few questions? If that's alright." Twilight asks me. I stop to think about it for a minute, I mean, do I really want to tell her everything.

"I'll ony answer the questions I want." I tell her and she smiles anyway, probably happy to get anything with the attitude I'm coming at them with. So it is justified that she's happy about that.

"Well first lets introduce you to my friends." I already know them and I doubt we'll actually be friends so this is rather stupid but if It moves this along faster I'll deal with it.

"You've already spoke to Rainbow Dash." The girl in question just give a nod.

"This here is Applejack." Said person reaches over for a handshake.

"Howdy partner, you sure made a mess o' those dogs." I suppose I did. While we are shaking hands everyone seems confused. "Well, your certainly are strong. If you ever need a job Sweet Apple Acres 'll welcome you." I was then that I noticed that she actually seems to be trying to really shake my hand with great enthusiasm, no doubt capable of dislocating someones arm if not careful, lucky I don't have any bones.

"Next is Rarity." then she motions to the girl that looks like a receptionist from a half decent porno.

"A pleasure, darling." egh gag, what the fuck sort of accent is that, is it British. Fuck, i'm British and I can't even tell. It's like one of those shit impersonations.

"Hello." I say with a curt nod, shit accent or not, might aswell be somewhat polite.

"This here is Pinkie Pie." Twilight says, gesturing to the girl and she seems to be vibrating on the spot.

"Hi-there-i'm-Pinkie-Pie-do-you-like-parties-or-cakes-Cupcakes-maybe-even-muffins-you-seem-like-a-muffin-person-so-do-want-one." As she finishes the sentence se produces a muffin from her hair and hands it over. I'm going to admit, I understood everything she said but I'm not going to grace her with an answer. So I smile and nod. I Also take the muffin but I'm pretty sure eating won't do anything.

Then Twilight points to where Fluttershy is hiding and again introduced her. "Over there is Fluttershy." I stare in Fluttershy's direction for a few second noticing that she isn't that well hiden before looking over to Twilight.

"You wanted to ask me questions." I say to her, hoping to continue forward and get everything over with so I can look for things like a house fly, catch it is going to be a bitch but the increased reaction time will hopefully be worth it.

"Ah right. Sorry about Fluttershy, she doesn't handle new people very well." Twilight says before beginning to walk in the direction of what, I assume, is her house. Eveyone else walks away though. They have their own personal lives so it is to be expected especially after it getting interrupted by the demon guy, Malreth, is his name appearantly.

Walking to Twilights home was peaceful, aside from the odd thank you, and I prefer it to be that way, athough I get the feeling that at somepoint in the future my love for peace and quite is going to be challenged by a need to fight something, probably will be those demons, but I suppose that isn't so bad if I get to consume them. Malreth actually gave me really good mutations and I'm thankful for that, I got:

Demon blood, can transform into a demon and has a resistance to hellish attacks.

Arcane knowledge, I know the hows and whys of magic but not the ability to cast.

Claws, not to be mistaken for the foot long blades of death, these claws are smaller and look similar to really sharp fingers.

I also got a few skills from the diamond dogs that got consumed like:

I can now dig through the earth like it's play dough.

A greater sense of smell.

Dog like hearing.

With these new skills I find myself feeling more confident in my ability to make things die. Honestly, I feel like doing a real version of Bulletstorm, if you're gonna kill you might as well do it in style.

As I'm walking with Twilight I just notice that Screw Ball is standing beside me and even with superhuman abilities I never even noticed her. She sees me staring and looks up only to give a smile and look forward again.

Weird.

Some questions and a party

"Twilight!" shouts a voice from the back of Twilights home. I turn to the voice to see a kid run up to Twilight and give her a hug. He had messy green hair with bright, emerald, slit, eyes. He was wearing a purple zip up jacket with a plain green shirt underneath, he had green and purple cargo shorts and some purple and white shoes.

"I was worried about you, when those diamond dogs came in and dragged you out I couldn't do anything but hide... I'm hardly a great assistant, let alone number one." at this I feel I should interject with his statement.

"If you tried anything you would have died, you might not want to believe it but it's true." This seems to shock (I'm using the words shock and suprise a lot.) the boy and from his facial expression I can tell I'm right. "Chin up kid, the problems gone now so you can focus on your life again." This doesn't do much but get a depressed sigh from the boy but there isn't much I can do about that.

"Anyway, Chris meet Spike, the best assistant anyone could ask for." I can tell she's doibg her best to lift his spirits and it worked a bit as he gave a small smile.

"Hey, I take it you help everyone?" Now that's a suprise, don't even tell him anything yet and he figured that out.

"How'd you guess?" I ask genuinely curious, I don't believe it was obvious but damn, he is sharp.

"I've never seen you before and when I do meet you it's right after the town is save. I just connected the dots." Well, he's definitely smart for what smells like a fourteen year ol- nevermind kids that age can be that smart if raised normally. But still, good on him.

"Clever enough, we might just become friends." This is likely the only compliment i'll be giving for a quite.

Huh, barely been in this world a month and my personality has changed so much. I used to actually be a nice person, well, nice enough. Now I'm almost sociopathic in terms of socialising with people and dealing with threats.

And yet I don't care. That's Blacklight for you, getting rid of remorse and empathy for the sake of survival.

"Thanks, I'd like to have more guy friends." I guess I can see why. Guys and girls interests can get too at different times. More power to him if he wants to make more friends.

"Well, we'll talk later. Right now I'm going to answer a few questions for Twilight." after saying that, spike gives me a look of pity before walking over to the kitchen to get something to eat.

"Well then, take a seat. I'd like to get started." doing as she asks we both take a seat on one of the chairs in the main library. "Now then, what type of human are you? Normally you can tell by looking at them but I can't tell with you. Judging from some of the uhh... Skills you displayed earlier I'd have to say that you're a Magi but taking into account the power you gave of when doing that lightening spell I'd have to say you might even be an Ultagi and so far there are only three of them amd they are all princesses... Your not some secret Prince, are you?" seeing my confused look she gives a shy smile. "Right, that's ridiculous." since I have no clue what she's talking about I just agree with her.

"Yeeeaah, ridiculous." I say before asking a question myself. "Say I've uh been asleep... Yeah, been asleep for a quite a while. So I have no idea what your talking about. Care to elaborate?" Now that got a really shocked looked from her.

"How could you not know!? It's been this way for over a thousand years." Well at least I know how far back history goes here. Earth wins by five thousand, if I'm correct.

"Well then, I have a lot of birthdays to catch up on then, don't I, haha." Okay, now she just looks curious.

"So you've been around since before humans gain their aspects." Ah now that's a familiar statement. Aspects, not hard what they do.

"Yeah, so what type's are there." I ask hoping to learn as much as I can. Knowledge is power after all. Pretty easy to win a fight when you know exactly how to react to your enemy.

"Well, as I said, there are the Magi, like myself, who arw capable of manipulating the world around them with magic." Alright, that's a reasonable trait. They must be the most frail though.

"Next are the Avious. If you are one of these you can fly and control the weather. The Avious has two sub-species, the pegasi and griffon. A egasi Avious usually has a herbivorous diet with the occasional fish. While the griffons are more carnivorous, but both of them are omnivores, just like every other aspect type." Good to know, flight will definitely be useful, just shake an Avious hand and be done with it.

"After them are the Terrus. They are physically stronger and more durable then both Magi and Avious and can increase the growth rate of plants. When they do this the plants usually grow better than a natural grown one." Alright they could also be helful. I wonder if they could become Poison Ivy.

"Then there are the bat aspects or Threstrals as they are officially known as. They have a combination of bat ans Avious abilities." if echolocation is one of them I might just have a plan to aquire Hunters sense.

"Next are a combination of all three, the Ultagi. As you can guess they have physical superiority, flight and weather control, magic and immortality or at the very lest agelessness. This is an incredibly rare occurrence and as I said only three of them exist. Princess Celestia, Luna and Mi Amour Cadenza or Cadence as she prefers. If you do turn out to be an Ultagi you'll likely be crowned as a prince." We can't have that, it puts me under a spotlight and since I am immortal I'd be stuck there forever.

"Next are the dragon aspects. They, live dragons in myths can breathe fire and have longevity. They are known to hoard and the ones with the biggest hoard eventually take on a dragons appearance. Spike is a dragon aspect, you can tell by is eyes and sharper teeth or his tendency to eat gems." Well that's a suprise. I wonder what I could do with that. Diamond coated durmal armour, not a bad idea.

"That's all the one's you are likely to meet, if you want to now more, you're always welcome to study in the library." A fair offer and one I'll take at somepoint in the future.

"I can say for sure that I'm not any of those, but for convenience sake lets just say Magi for know." she seem strangely accepting of that answer. I figured she was super inquisitive, apparently not as much as I thought.

"What was the magic you used? I've never seen anything like it, but it was definitely powerful." Ah, smart question I suppose. Might as well get this over with.

"It's light. A type of energy, similar to magic, that can be focused in three different types of power. Sol, Arc and void. Currently it only has twelve main 'spells' and a few small tricks." I tell her, trying to remember some of the skills.

"Really, what type of spells are there?" she ask me with her overly excited expression if learning something new.

"There are twelve class spells. For those that are hardened with discipline they can get the Striker, Defender and Sunbreaker. What I used ealier was the Stiker spell, fist of havoc. Next are the spells for the free spirited. The Gunslinger, Bladedancer and Nightstalker. After that, are people like you, people that want to understand everything. The Voidwalker, Sunsinger and Stormcaller. Each of these perform different things that are useful for certain tasks. You should note that all spells made from light, aside from a few, are made for combat. Defender is the only class dedicated to protecting yourself, as its spell is a massive shield thst can take on anything without collapsing." Now Twilight looks awed at the what I've told her. She's definitely a Warlock.

Holy shit, just thought of something. Can light bring machines to life. It would explain the Ghosts.

"What was that thing you done to that demon at the end? You... Asorbed him. How?" well shit, I'm not revealing that shit. Doesn't matter if this is Equestria, no one needs to know about Blacklight. It would terrify them. I'm arguably worse than a demon.

"I not telling. I don't want to be rude about it, but I refuse to answer that question. All you need to know is its safe if used correctly. If an amnesiac can learn how to use it in a day without ending the world, then it's safe enough, but there's always a margin for error and that is way no one can I don't completely trust can know. Since someone might try a replica and while I doubt the could recreated they may make something that could cause life threatening problems." Twilight certainly looks spooked, I already know she's going to try and find out what it is but with no context she won't find anything and just assume it's a spell from my time before her world began.

"W-well. I think that's enough questions for today. Is there anything you wanted to ask?" not really sure what I want to know. I lift my han up to scratch my check more out of instinct than anything else and feel something that has never been there before. Facial hair, huh.

"A mirror, I get the feeling in my time asleep I've changed." I know that might be unnecessary but out of all my time alive, starting from puberty anyway, I have never grown facial hair. So when Twilight returns with a mirror I get a shock.

Staring back a me is the Devil. Well, Lucifer be correct and not the guy from supernaturals, but the one from Lucifer. The show where the Devil got bored of hell so he leaves for the world of humans, opens a nightclub then after a murder he starts helping the police. Why I am describing the show to myself. I may never have an answer, but it's is a shame. I never got to see season three.

"I... I not gonna complain, but why? Then again, the fsce of the devil is fitting for the type if person I am. Always did believe in the freedom to do anything as long as you accepted the consequences." I whisper to myself "Not like yhe devil is all that bad anyway. He's the voice of freedom and curiosity, to fight for what you believe in and to try and reach a maximum understanding of everything you can." The religious part of me doesn't seem to agree. Lucifer started a war in Heaven, after all. Thst is true but it was a war to escape the guilded cage known as Heaven. True it's paradise, but an eternity of paradise will get boring after a while and when boredom sets in, welcome to hell.

I'm really getting in to all this religious stuff. That's not healthy for the mind. No one wants to be a zealot. That now that's real bad.

"I think I'm going to talk to Spike. He seems like a interesting guy." after bidding Twilight are rather abrupt goodbye I walk of to the kitchen to see Spike sitting at the table with a bowl full of gems.

"Oh, hey there, Chris. Need something?" How kind, he certainly doesn't have a dragons heart. Least, not a European dragon anyway, maybe Chinese.

"Nah, just wanted a chat... You seem like a comic book type guy, am I right or not." he doesn't even have to answer I can see it on his face the moment I said comic.

"Yeah! Why? do you want to read one? I can spare a few." yep, total comic nerd. I prefer the games, but hey, what can you do?

"Who's your favourite hero?" might be able to find out more about him if I know what ideals he follows.

"I don't really have one yet, but my favourite team is yhe power ponies." All right, i'll have to read on these guys.

"Do you have a favourite hero?" well this is going to be hard to answer. There are too many heros where i'm from.

"Uhh, the Red Hood. He isn't technically a hero, but he's no villain either. He is an anti-hero." Now I seem to have his attention. Obviously, he hasn't heard of the Red Hood before. This is new territory.

"What's his superpower..? And what's an anti-hero?" this is a good conversation, maybe I'll tell him about deadpool next.

"Well, he doesn't have a superpower. He's smart, strong and has almost unmatched skill in fighting, he was trained by one of the more brutal heros, Batman, who constantly scares the hell out of all everyones henchmen and isn't afriad to breaks bones to deliver justice. That being said Batman, nowadays, will not kill." This seems to please Spike, after all, you can somewhat relate to powerless superheroes. "Like a few other heros, the Red Hood is an anti-hero. An anti-hero is someone who will likely murder the bad guy rather than capture them. This is because anti-heros either used to be villains or have a backstory that makes them one." I can see the questions burning behind Spikes eyes. "What do you want to know?"

"Why did the Red Hood become an anti-hero?"

"At somepoint in the Batman comics, his sidekick, Robin Aka. Jason Todd was presumably killed by Batmans Arch-nemisis, the Joker. So with that information, Batman eventually moved on and got someone else to fill Robins role." And what do you know, Spike is hanging of every wotd I say. "After some time Jason Todd was brought back to life through the Lazarus pit. Unfortunately the oit changed him and his emotions so much that he eventually dawns the Red Hood. He goes on a quest to tries to find people who wronged him. He finds, kidnaps and beats the Joker with a crowbar mirroring how the Joker did to him. The Red Hood then takes control over various gangs and then starts a one-man war against the Black masks empire... I just realised gave you a summarised backstory, sorry for the rant." it appears as though Spike doesn't care about that shit, though.

"Are you kidding!? That was awesome! I didn't think they made stories that go that far, with scenes like that. It's rare to even see blood in comics here." Really now, I think I found a way to make money. It's not plagiarism if it doesn't exist.

"Well then, you're gonna love Deadpool." Deadpool, my favourite organ donating, psycopath.

"It all started with a mercenary...

... Then, while colossus was giving an inspiring speech, he pulls the trigger, splattering Francis's brains over the ground and it makes colossus throw up chunky goodne-"

"Hey Chris." motherfuckin' interruptions

"Yeess." I say to Twilight, drawing out the word for longer than necessary.

"Do you two feel like coming with me over to sugar cube corner to get something to eat." I don't need to eat.

"You wanna go Spike? I don't really care." He contemplating, he probably should go we've been in here for a few hours.

"Yeah, I'm getting pretty hungry." It's settled then, I get up with Spike and walk out of the library with him and Twilight.

The trip to sugar cube corner was a suspiciously short one. Suspicious because there was no one around, I mean the sun was still pretty high, just getting oast the zenith, since I arrived here at the start of the day. The walk was short because I was taking long strides.

So we finally arrive and what do you know, it smell full of people and I can hear them whispering. Might as well play along. We walk up to the ginger bread building and I open the door really slowly, trying to build up tension for those inside before stopping and turning to Twilight.

"You sure it's open, the lights are off." I say loud enough for everyone inside to hear. Now Twilight's looking rather nervous, probably expected me to walk in without hesitation.

"O-of course it's open, it's always open this time of day, everyday. It's a part of their schedule." Rahter than responding, I look at Spike, who's just chiilin' there and when he looks up at me I give him a knowing smirk. Something that he is all to happy to return.

"Fair enough. Any sane person would never break schedule." I say with obvious sarcasm. Stare Twilight in the eyes for a few more seconds before turning around and walking in. 3. 2. 1.

Suprise!!!

I give them the satisfaction of slightly widened eyes and a small gasp so they don't feel bad about. It somewhat worked. Some of the people that were looking at me in fear earlier gave a sigh of relief, they probably figure I tear their heads off or something.

Then the pink menace appears looking at me suspiciously. "You weren't suprised, were you?" She says in a serious tone, her hair seems to have defleated a little and she is giving a slight glare.

"I'm suprised you bothered trying, I thought that out of everyone in this town you would be able to get read on me the easiest and would ne awee that suprises wouldn't work. A for effort, though." tell her giving a small smile.

She gives an exasperated gasp. "Your right, I must not have noticed. Can you ever forgive me!" she practically shouts.

"Of course. I hate suprises anyway and saw this coming a charging Bull." I say with a semi-serious expression.

"Lets get this party started!!!"

Indeed.

And being myself I immediately walk of to the corner of the room barely taking notice of the stares. What can I say, Lucifer was a handsome fellow and I happen to be a replica of him, minus the scars, obviously.

After a few minutes into the party and I haven't done anything but stand there like a grumpy SS soldier on a watchtower, not the best comparison, but you get the point, and after a few more minutes I am approached by a trio of children, more specifically known a the Cutie Mark Crusaders.

"Hey there." I look down at the scootaloo and give a nod.

"Hey. Want something?" I inquire, curious as to what they want and yet I know the answer at the same time.

"We wanted to say thanks for saving the town." Sweetie Belle says, staring up at me with a thankfull smile before handing me a basket.

"What's this?" I ask, knowing these three it probably isn't good at all. Even if it's a thank you gift.

"Well, open it and find out, silly." oh dear, I do as i'm asked. Surprisingly there was rather ~~Well made~~ good looking food. The Crusaders are all looking at me expectantly, so I decide to try eating it. Well I definatly wasn't what I was expecting. It was a salad but it got added to my biomass reserves. That shouldn't happen, but hell free biomass, why complain.

"Thank you. I'll be sure to return the favour at some point later." I going to ignore their excited looks and just go back looking around the party. I'm seeing a lot of familiar faces. Before I can do so much as to introduce myself to any of them Pinkie appears and stares at me for a second.

"Are you not enjoying the party?" that was an unexpected question, sure I'm not having a great time, but this isn't the worst thing I've done. It's certainly no murdering hundreds of people the minute you enter a village. Yes, I am aware that they were people I killed and that I should be drowning in guilt, but I'm not so I won't.

"The parties fine, I'm certain you put everything into it." I tell her. True, her feelings mean nothing to me but that's no reason be a dick.

"Prove It." I detect a challenge

"What do I need to do?" I ask smiling at the possibility of staving off boredem. Athough her request takes me a bit to fully comprehend.

"Play some of the games, of course." Well the is going to be fun said Mr sarcastic

"Sure, lead the way." This was the beginning of a somewhat not shit day. Still prefer the Everfree. At least there when something is afraid of you it runs away. Well, they are just animals solely on instinct whereas hear the play nice and hope you don't kill them. Don't get me wrong the ones that fear me are a minority but still, if you don't want to interact with me leave or ask me to.

This monotonous party stayed dull for about an hour until a shocked voice rang out making everyone halt what they are doing.

"Princesses!"

This might not be so bad after all.

Author's Note

Hope you enjoy. I'll try not to rush things but I'm not a fan of writing about normal stuff.
The princesses have arrived, will our borderline bloodthirsty protagonist get along with them... probably not, but friendship and tolerance, people.
You're probably curious about his appearance, well I like the show Lucifer and I got lazy. I can change it anytime I feel like it, so don't worry about that, I'll find an alternative at somepoint.
Also, an official friendship has been established between Chris and Spike through the almighty power of The Red Hood. This also created a possible business venture for Chris, Spike, like many young boys his age can appreciate the art of violent comics, but Equestria isn't providing. so if you want to see Chris bring Earth comics to Equestria, just say so. I'll take silence as a mabye.

Princesses of Sol and Void

"Princesses!" and like Goku's space shuttle, gravity must have increased tenfold because everyone immediately dropped to the ground. Practically grovelling at the feet of the new comers. This made it awkward as I was the only one not my knees and everyone knew. Not like they're willing to do anything about it as trying to correct me might lead to their death and yet they're not going to defend me as it's their princesses they'll be speaking against.

Lets get this over with.

"Hi there, wonderful weather we're having, is it not?" everyone lost their shit. Unlike the diamond dogs, it was all silent 'What the fuck are tou doing' type of lost shit. The tallest princess didn't seem to mind. In fact she was smiling. The other one looked ready to kill me.

"You Dare address us so causally, knave." Ow, very Ow. Sensitive hearing might not be so good. White noise and pain. Oh, wait nevermind, it's all gone now. Even the eldest sister (I'm assuming sister.) was grimacing at the volume of her voice.

"I believe what my sister is trying to say is 'Why are you not bowing like everyone else?" well at least I know for certain that this is Celestia and Luna, at least personality wise.

"There are currently, only two ways to make me bow. Earn my respect or force me to my knees. For both your sakes I hope you try the first one. It would be a realm shame if a fight broke out. I don't think I'd be able to hold myself back for the sake of everyone in my way." Of course if a fight between us were to happen Celestia would likely teleport us somewhere barren to decrease accidental deaths.

"You seem confident you would win." is my confidence misplaced... Yes, yes it is. Truefully I doubt I would win a fight with them. One-on-one, mabye, it could go either way, but definitely not both of them at the same time.

"You never know what could happen in a fight. Anyway, you came here for something, yeah?" this is unlikely a suprise visit consdering Luna's here and she looks like she did after her purge. Hmm, season one then. Unless the timeline is really fucked.

"True, Twilight sent a report detailing the attack on Ponyville and its rescue. Am I correct in guessing you are the reason Ponyville is still standing?" yeppo, might as well play nice with the princesses, they are the only other immortals here..

"Yeah, I found a kid in the Everfree and she asked for my help. Feeling generous I went and helped out." that sounds reasonably trueful. Still debating whether I should tell them it was a test for myself. Nah, what they don't know won't kill them.

"Well, for that you have our thanks, right Luna." Seems Luna is still a little salty. What did I expect though. She probably taking out some frustration on me, learning a thousand years of history will piss anyone off.

"Aye, we thank thee for aiding Ponyville." aannd now she's cheerful, weird. Hole up. Everyone is still bowing. Jesus, do the need to be... Nevermind.

"Do you want to tell everyone they're free to stand." I ask not fully enjoying everyone on the floor.

"Right. You may all rise." seems she never noticed, not as perfect as they think. Well, she is a human now. That's to be expected.

"Anything you wished to speak with me about." lets be honest, if they wanted to meet me they could have asked Twilight to bring me to them. I wouldn't have went, but still. They likely need something and require it fast enough for both of them to leave the castle.

"Yes. Do you mind if we speak in private?" that I can do. Without speaking a word I walk past them and out of the party. When I'm outside the princesses leave sortly after.

"Sooo, whatcha need?" They look at eachother before nodding. Which is getting pretty damn paranoid. Preparing for a possible fight I get into a half-assed combat stance of putting my left foot behind the right and twisting it at a ninty degree angle incase my first move should be a dodge.

"Twilight Sparkle informed us that you use light as a means to to vanquish your foes." It's going to be strange listening to her switch between old and mordern English.

"Yes? What of it?" that sounded rude. Oh well. Celestia and Luna look at eachother again, though it's more of a we know something you need to know type look. If that's even a thing.

"Well you show us? We would like to be sure before we tell you." tell me what? Ah fuck it, I'll find out soon enough. What should I do. Which one glows the most. They want light. Right before I select the one I want an unnaturally loud roar/Screech breaks the relative silence we were in. And looking over to the Everfree forest I see another demon walk out.

This one doesn't seem to be as intelligent as the other one but I can tell I might cause some problems. It steps into the moonlight, yeah, the party has been going on that long, and what I see makes my eyes widen significantly and a single confused thought rushes through my head.

Xenomorph?

No, it's not, but it's similar enough the biggest difference is that it doesn't have those things on normal Xenos back and its head is human in shape with no eyes and a set of razor sharp teeth where lips would be.

"How about a demonstration?" I say looking back at the princesses, they seem to be ready to fight themselves, but there is a confused terror that's being pushed down so they can focus. By focus I mean stare at me like i'm an idiot.

"You don't expect to fight that thing off. It may be wild, but I can sense the magic pouring out of it from here. It'll kill you." This thing has magic. Fuck. The hell. Yes. I want- no I need to consume it. Here's to hoping magic is a biological triat.

"Trust me. I can take it." they back of a bit. Likely because of the unholy smile that has made its way onto my face. Taking that as a reason to go ahead, I run toward the Xeno clone.

As I get closer and closer it seems to sense my presence and turns toward me, giving a hostile hiss before getting down on all fours and then starts crawling toward me. We finally meet, It pounces up, but instead of getting my throat it gets a fist to the face and I flys backward. Unfortunately it managed to wrap its tail around my leg before hand, this causes me to get dragged along with it.

As I land on top of it I can help but realise thing is stronge enough to actually move me. My thoughts were cut off when I feel something enter my throat and it takes a moment to realise it bit me. Then the pain starts as it actually tears out my throat causing biomass to fly everywhere. There are a few shocked gasp in the distance, certainly more than two people meaning I have an audience. I ignore them, regenerate my throat and then grab the creature by its arm and crush it causing its, suprise, acidic blood to coat my hand. Starting a battle between my skin melting and regenerating.

Getting up off the creature and it doing the same while cradling its arm. The little shit turn around to run, but I activate shadowshot and I hit its leg, blowing it off, and causing it to collapse. It immediately rolls with the fall and throws its unbroken arm at me and an ice spike flys at me an impales my in the gut. I just tear it out and shatter it over the things head, good thing I can still get adrenaline.

As I lays there, bleeding out, I wonder how to go about consuming it. Getting an idea I walk over to it's lost leg, surrond my arm in durmal armour, and pick up the lost limb, noting the acid doesn't work that well against it, and consume it. Seeing it leaving minimal damage I harden the armour I usually leave under the skin and consume the main body, it still hurt, and recived some interesting mutations, like:

Magic cells, you can now take in the ambient magic of the world and charge your cells with them giving you the ability to use magic.

Acid glands, turn biomass into a corrosive liquid or gas.

High impact shell, this armour upgrade makes it so dermal armour can ignore damage from attacks that move at incredible speeds or hit dangerously hard, like a bullet or a trian.

Scent, people and animals give certain smells depending on their intentions.

Echolocation, use sounds to see all aroind you.

Hunters scent, combining scent and echolocation sends out a pulse that tracks down a certain smell, such as a person, for miles around.

Wall crawl, can stick to surfaces.

Bladed tail, a tail that can glide through flesh with ease.

Cold immunity, can thrive in the most extreme blizzards without any discomfort.

I'm liking this, so much stuff. Hunters scent seems similar to that pulse thing thing you can do Prototype 2 so that's good. Don't know when i'll use it, it is still useful.

Through the memories I managed to get from it, it was suppose to find out what happened in Ponyville and report back. It isn't getting that chance, Ha.

Moving on, I look back at the princesses only to realise that they were surrounded by everyone from the party. I stare for a second not really sure what to do, déjà vu anyone, I decide I would be best to talk with the princesses again after all, that is why I decided to fight it.

"Sooo, whatcha think?" I ask them, now curious as to what they wanted to tell me before we were interrupted by the quasi-xeno.

"So that's what light can do." that wasn't a question, I wonder if she's talking about the consuming.

"Shadowshot, the bow, was made from light. That thing at the end was different." or is it, Blacklight. Black-light. light. Ha, not so different after all. Never would have guessed, imagine it, Guardians of earth going around and consuming Fallen, Hive and cabal. No Vex though, they're machines.

"Well then, what are going to show you hasn't been seen in over a thousand years." How, specific. Mabye it's actually trillions of years old. Rather than taking me to some secret cave that holds Excalibur or some crap like that, they just summon a small book. Although the real suprise came from what was on the front of it, it was the Destiny's symbol. Looks remarkably like a figet spinner, with the middle and top removed and a small line where they used to be.

I flip open the book to read the first page and see that it is a small description of what light is and who and what can use it. Although it doesn't say how you can learn to use it. The next page is a Titans striker sub-class. It tells you what a striker can do as well and provides a picture of a Titan performing a fists of havoc. I flip through the book and see that it shows the same thing, more Sub-class descriptions and pictures depicting their supers. Then the last page came an I wasn't sure the hell to think about it. There was Genteks logo with a biohazard sign behind it with the words 'Not all light is good.' Likely referencing Blacklight.

"Where did you get this?" Like seriously, where the fuck.

Celestia answered " We aren't too sure why, but a thousand and some years ago someone broke into our old castle, injured anything that got in his way, walked into my court and dropped the book and turned away and walked out." oooookay, certainly a strange story.

"Who... Was this?" I ask feeling a bit like I know the answer.

"We aren't sure. When I ask who he was he just stated 'Guy who has yet to be named.' he also said that we I should prepare for the arrival of this world greatest hero and I most horrifying Villain, but he made it sound like the hero and villain were the same person." motherfucker, it was the same guy that sent me here. That means he got here a thousand years before I did, gave them that book and then sent me here. It also implies that he new what I was going to choose... or he can time travel. What's this shit about being a hero though, I'm as heroic as cancer. Sure i've done heroic things, but the main factors for doing them were selfish. I also won't be a villain, a violent force of nature, but not a villain.

"In light-" Ha, pun "-of current those events and your own actions today we have decided to see you adequately rewarded for saving the lives of everyone in Ponyville." You know what, I don't even care anymore, if people want to believe i'm a hero, fine, let them. "For you actions you will be granted the title of noble and, if you wish, you will be knighted." That's a lot of stuff, I think. Being a noble, don't know what that gives me but fuck it, it can't be bad if it's a reward. Being knighted though, this means I'll be defending Equestria from threats and fighting in wars. I'm okay with that. Let it happen.

"Sounds fun, I'll accept both." Wonder how many Knights there are. It's far too peaceful for there to be many. Ha, too peaceful. My hundreds already and it has only been a day.

"Wonderful, you will need to come to Canterlot for it. Knighting services are held within the castle, throne room." A fair enough, might even meet sme fellow Knights. Not looking forward to the nobles though, they're kind of pricks.

"Well then shall we be off?" Before Celestia gets to answer Luna cuts in before her cusing some suprise for her.

"May we have words with thee before we leave for the capital." didn't expect that, but it should be important if she's keeping the family out of it. Naughty, barely back from the moon and already keeping secrets.

"Sure." Luna and I walk away from Celestia who is just standing there, though she shrugs and walks off in Twilights direction.

"We wish to offer you a job." I swear to God if this isn't fun I will Lord Boros her back to the moon

"Depends on what it is." I say with a suspicious glare, although she doesn't seem to care about all that shit and keeps speaking anyway.

"We believe that Equestria hath gotten weaker, over the thousand years that we hath been gone. We want for thou to perform missions that would stop threats before they get out of hand." ohhh, hell yeah, dis gon be gud.

"So you wish for me to be Equestria's black hand, Alright sure." and another suprised face. Didn't expect me to agree no doubt. I shall be the be the greatest knightsassin

After our conversation we walk back over to Celestia who is just finishing a conversation with Twilight. She looks over and see us coming and says her goodbyes with Twilight then walks over to us.

"Are you prepared to leave now." she ask, Luna and myself just nod and follow Celestia over to the center of the town before they light there hands in a Gold and Teal glow before everything goes blindingly white. Deciding to test Scent I activate it and I'm suddenly see that i'm beside two green auras with a few other yellow ones all over the place. I'm assuming green means ally and yellow is neutral.

My eyes finally regain their sight and I look around to see Canterlot in all it's glory. Currently I'm seem to be on a balcony of some sort, looking over the entire city. Good view.

"I take it you like the view." says Celestia from behind me and I give her a small nod. Sure it's a good view, how could it not be, it's a city of marble. I might be slightly bias, but I like marble. So yeah

"I shall have a servant escort you to a guest room, you can stay in there until I get you a more permanent place of residence." coolio, don't really need a house, the Everfree was good enough.

After waiting for about five minutes of waiting the door finally knocks. "You may enter." and in she comes.

Standing at the door was a girl roughly in her early twenties, with fairly Tan skin, Caramel hair and pink eyes. She was wearing a ehat I assume is the castles maid uniform since their is no other reason for her be wearing one. Altogether she looked plenty nervous. First time receiving direct orders from her princess perhaps.

"Y-you asked for me, Princess?" did that sentance sound weird. No, but it did. You asked for me. Asked for. Hmm, that wiuld mean thst Celestia specifically wanted her... Or it was a slip if the tongue.

"Yes, would you be kind enough to show my guest to one of the gues rooms?" Celly asks her. Hearing her orders she looks aroind the room and sees me... Then blushes? The fuc- Oh wait, nevermind, I look like Lucifer and he's pretty high up on the handsome scale.

"Of course, you highness." she says,slipping into a somewhat professional tone. Good for her. I get up an walk towards her and as I'm right infront of her I stare he in the eyes for a bit, to see whst see would do, which is blush again.

"I'm assuming you're green." she looks at me with a confused glance before shaking her head.

"N-no, i'm Swift Feather" What. Oh, green. Equestria and their adjective based names, Goddamn.

"Chris Licht, you seem fun, so you get the privilege of calling me Light. Or Nazi." I rather not be called Nazi, but friendship traditions dictate that, at least one of my friends has to.

"Shall we be going then?" ahah, my weirdness has made her less shy. Great, maybe I can kill boredom with a conversation.

"Lead the way." ands so she did. We had a normal conversation on the way to the room so I was happy with the results. I might even have a second friend, this is good, four more and I'll have more friends here than in my old life... Why hello nostalgia, we haven't spoken in a while. Ah yes I do remember my family and yes I still don't care for them.

Moving on from that, we arrived at my destination, technically i've been here for fifteen minutes, but I was talking with Swift. I bid her goodbye and walk into my temporary room and notice that it's pretty swanky. A large bed, two nightstands on eath side, cupboard, vanity set, private bathroom and a large window.

First order of business, closing the blinds and curtains. The second, go to sleep.

Christ, this bed is comfy.

Author's Note

Welp, tell us whatcha think. May or may not take a a few days break from this. To think about the story and what I want to add or change about its future.
If you have any ability idea's for blacklight or his newly acquired magic feel free to say.

The creature

A nightmare, well I certainly didn't think that was possible. Nothing much I can do about now though. What was it about... It was all multicoloured and shit. Ah fuck it, I can't remember the damn thing which is concerning considering my supposed perfect memory.

I get out of bed a bit slower than I wanted, but nothing I can do. As I get to my feet I begin to walk to the rooms private bathroom before stopping. I don't need to piss, that is... Weird, it's practically a morning ritual by now. Deciding to ignore it I check my clothes in a mirror and notice that they are a fairly simple.

A blazer, unbuttoned dress shirt, dress pants and polished boots. Pretty plain. Lets change that.

After I finish shifting the biomass that makes up my clothing I can't help but smile and nod at my new clothing choice.

The blazer stays roughly the same exept that it has its sleeves rolled up, after that I have a black suit vest over a grey dress shirt that gets longer near the back and is almost completely unbuttoned except for the middle and under that is a plain purple shirt. For trousers I have a grey pair of dress pants and for shoes I have grey and white boots. On each of my legs, on the sides of the thigh, are leather holsters for Jackal and Casull.

Overall it looks like a modified version of handsome Jacks clothes. The primary differences being the colour and the size.

Not being one to waste time I make my way to the door by shade stepping 'cause why not. As I open the door I notice that Swift Feather is standing there with her arm raised probably going to attemp to wake me.

"Morning." I say which seems to bring back from her stupor.

"Good morning." The good is subjective, but whatever.

"Did you need anything or did you just miss me that much?" hahaha, making people blush is fun, I should make a game out of it. What should it be called though. I'll think about it later.

"The uh... Princesses wanted to invite you to breakfast." How kind, I wonder if they have cheese. Is cheese breakfast food, pretty sure it's an anything food.

"Lead the way." and with that simple request I start another adventure of aquiring knowledge of the castles layout. At least feom my room to the dining hall, cafeteria. Something like that.

"So umm?" a conversation, thank the Gods.

"Yeeessss?" that sounded freaky as hell, I ain't no Hisoka. Ah Hisoka, you scary bastard. That's good memories there.

"Well, there is a rumour that you are getting a noble title as well as being knighted. Is it true?" so that's what this is about. Wonder why she cares.

"Yeah, I'm more interested in the knighthood to be honest. Wonder if I'll get my own armour." Alright now she seems nervous.

"You're not going to turn out like most nobles, are you?" if by being like most nobles means being beyond sexy then yes, yes I will be.

"Care to elaborate, i've... Been asleep for a few thousand years and I don't really understand most things here." That's the lie I told Twilight, might as well stick with it.

"I'm not supposed to say this, but most of the nobles are selfish and corrupt. I rather you not be like them. You seem like a nice person, so it would be sad to see you become so vile." I get the feeling that she doesn't now i've already killed hundreds of people, granted they were diamond dogs so they're barely human.

"I can safely say that I will not become a selfish noble. As long as I have no reason to get upset I'll be content." This puts her a ease. Gonna admit, feels nice that someone is concerned. Enough of the emotion crap, we're here.

"Well, I hope to see you later." Might as well be polite.

"Goodbye, swifty." A nickname already, haven't even given Spike one yet. Dovahkiin will do for now since he is technically a dragon born.

Entering the dining hall was awkward to say the least. Celestia was sitting there alone, in a table fit for at least thirty to forty people.

"Princess, Morning. Where's you your sister?" I say with a nod in her direction.

"Good morning, Chris. She has already eaten and gone to sleep." oh right, nocturnal.

I walk over to where Celestia is and take a seat next her.

"I see you've procured new clothes." Hmm, strange. Does she have an inner fashoin sense that's tellling her how fabulous I look.

"You like, it's inspired by an ambitious man." not an untrue statement.

"It's definitely different than most of the clothes the nobles wear." that wasn't a confirmation or denial.

"My ask you a few questions as we eat?" I don't need to eat and the only reason I would is for memories and mutations.

"Go ahead." Wonder what she will ask.

"May I ask where you come from? You just showed up yesterday and saved an entire town. I was curious as to were you live." Hiw do I answer this. Simple, by telling her my fabricated backstory.

"You wouldn't know, the world I once knew is gone and in its place is... Here, I guess." She seems really curious now.

"How so?" well, time to tell her of my current predicament that is totally true.

"There isn't much to it. At somepoint I went to sleep and later, possibly thoudands of years in the future, I wake up." Now Celestia seem a bit skeptical.

"If you had to guess how long would you say you've slept for?" Hmm, how to answer this one without answering

"When Twilight asked me which type of race I was like a dragon or magi, I had no idea what she was talking about. So, before the races existed." The look in her eye seems to tell me she believes, surprisingly enough, but that's probably because I don't have any ticks to give away i'm lying and looking in my eyes won't help as i'm sure I don't have a soul to read. Unless viral bacterium has souls.

"That's beyond anything we understand at the moment. So long, possibly millions of years." not that bad, not like I really care for anyone back home aside from a few friends and the odd family member.

"There is a lot to tell about the past. Like it is far more advanced, technology wise, than Equestria." Now her eyes jave widened. "Though there were a lot more wars, a few of I fought in." That's over embellishing, but I remember playing through my video games like I lived through them. Alien: Isolation though. Egh, not fun. Then there's Outlast, hell to the no.

"I see. Well, I'd like to inform you that your ceremony for your noble title and knighthood is scheduled for tomorrow." so much time to spare, mabye I should go back to sleep, nah that'll be boring. Besides, if this is like any other Equestrian universe then this castle has a problem with blueballs. Not literally of course that'd be fuckin' weird.

"Anyway, it is nearly time for the morning court to start. I should head over to make sure i'm ready. I'll see you soon." what a nice lady. No point sitting here, time to explore the castle.

Getting up off my chair I leave the dining hall and make off in a random direction hoping to something and for the longest time I don't find anything until I come across an art gallery full of people. It's like nine in the morning, why are there so many people.

After walking in i'm greeted with the sight of many different artistic pieces, all of which were pretty decent. Nothing mind blowing quite yet, unfortunately.

Then I come across it.

One of the shit ones.

I stand there almost glaring as the piece of crap hanging on the wall. It's an almost completely white canvas with a single green line running through the centre. This isn't art. A dog could do it if I dipped its ass in paint and it scooted along the floor. I look at the description below until I find however made it and to my surprise it was Blueblood. I will be the first to admit that I thought he would be a good painter. He has fuck all friends, he needs to do something with his life and I though painting would be it. Mabye piano then.

Although thinking about the painting makes me remember something else I said I was going to do.

Time to draw a comic.

And done. I'm impressed, only took me about five hours to recreated. Granted it has no colour and the details aren't as full as they could be, but everything else is there.

As I said to Spike it's a Red Hood comic. I'll have him read it when I get the chance. I almost feel like thanking the person who I got all the drawing equipment from, but he wasn't using it so I took it upon myself to lay claim to the art supplies.

Looking at the clock, I notice that it's about half one. Leaving the comic in my room, I get up and walk out and straight into someone.

"Watch where you are walking you inept buffoon!" hoooooly shit. That smell is potent as fuck. It's a combination of something musky and bloody. Musky means that he's either not showered in a while or he's been having intimate relations with someone. The blood though, that means a fight or accident. Worst cause scenario, this guy had to get violent before forcing himself on someone. Best case is he doesn't like washing and cut himself pretty badly.

"Are you going to apologise for walking into your prince or are you going to stand there like the imbecile you are!" Oooh ho ho ho hooooo. Worst case it is. I can't just straight up kill him though, not without proof. I'm going to stalk him for the rest of my time in Canterlot. Firstly though, lets play along.

"My apologies, my Prince. I was blinded by your brilliance and couldn't see where I was going." This is bullshit. There no way he'l-

"I suppose I can't fully blame you then. Very well, continue with your work servant." Hahahaha, he's lucky I don't have a sense of pride mearly mock narcissistic personality to joke around with.

Now then, lets stalk a prince.

Suspicious already. Hasn't been a full half an hour and he is already up to something. If the fact that he is trying to not be suspicious isn't suspicious then the fact that he has left the castle completely, without an escort, and has found his way into an alleyway definitely is.

He stops and knocks on a door and I hear a voice coming from it. "Yes?"

"Sigma." what the hell, a password, maybe.

"Welcome back, Prince." and with the door opens and Blueblood walks in. Deciding to find out what's going on, I create a small wasp out of Blacklight and when it wakes up I send it off, into the building. I wait for about twenty minutes, trying to draw out magic so I can get a feel for it, when the wasp returns I absorb it back into my vody and its memories pour into me.

"A slave ring? Ha, more like an excuse to kill. Hold on... Is that... Swifty. Now I have to be careful." after deciding on a course of action I walk over to the door and knock on it.

"You look new, now the password?" could you have at least try to conceal something is going on.

"Sigma." I hear the door unlocking. As soon as it opens I see the man guarding the door. I didn't really take in his appearance as the second there was enough room I changed my right hand into the claws and ripped the guys throat open then consumed him.

A recruit. Ha, bad time to get hired. What he does know is that this thing is lead by someone called Chrystal. I soooo wonder who that is. Totally not a changeling and certainly not a queen.

In the guise of the rook, I walk into the complex. After a few moments of wandering the halls and looking around the place I find a few little goodies. The first thing was a small bag of bits, I don't need money for anything, but I feel like having it for possible bribery. The next thing I see is a lone noble, standing there by themselves with no one around. Making the choice to consume them and dawn a new disguise, since it's likely a new guard would be suspicious if they were caught wandering, and with it I walk over to the final thing I found. A large set of double doors are in feont of me and the smell coming from it indicates that it is likely full of people, horny people, but still people. At least until i'm done, then they'll be a meal.

"Ah, sir Red Crest, there you are." who's this.

"Lady Hollow, to what do I owe the pleasure." Thank the Gods for lymphocytes, if I didn't get peoples memories, my life would be so much more bloody.

Why am I even disguised again. Kicking down the door and slaughtering everything would have been the preferred option. Oh right, Swifty, she got caught up in all this and unfortunately she isn't secretly a noble meaning there is one reason for her here and the only reason I bothered helping personally. I was going to let the guard do it, but I would rather her not be a hostage if things went south.

What these little creatures wouldn't expect is for say, a noble to suddenly start killing everyone, they wouldn't even have the time to get there pants up much less take a hostage.

"I just never exp-ack!" to be stabbed in the throat, for the face of your friend to be last thing you see or to see a mans arm turn into a weapon.

Oh... It people have noticed what has happened. Might as well not waste free food and with that I stsrted consuming the girl I killed to everyone's shock and horror. Deciding to start of the party, drew Jackal and Casull then start ripping in to people.

The first person to try and fight back manged to get and energy bolt to hit me and other than searing into my shoulder, which hurt like hell, nothing particularly bad happened as it started to heal over.

The man who shot reached his end when I dashed forward and jammed Casull into his eye before pulling the trigger, painting everything behind him red, including the other nobles and even a few slaves.

Then, as if by some unanimous and unspoken agreement, all the nobles stsrted firing and I have to admit the shots that hit burned. One of the few thing that can hurt be are things that burn my biomass, hell, anything that causes me to lose mass hurts so thst includes burning, tteaeing and corroding.

Thinking about desting I make a test and to my eternal thanks it was successful. Summoning the sentinels shield, I hold it in front of my and all the shots start hitting it. After the barrage stops I take an unneeded breath before drawing my arm backwards and throwing it forwards, making the shield fly towards the nobles and it starts bouncing off of them like a sick game of pinball, incinerating any who get hit by the shield. When the shield runs it's course the shield evaporates into nothingness.

Seeing the nobles look on in horror, I allow myself a smirk of satisfaction. Thinking on it, I remember that the demon I ate a while ago still has knowlege on quite a few nasty spells thst I can put into practice because of that magic xenomorph.

Lifting up my left hand, I watch as it ignites into flame without harming my. Not knowing what to do, I decide to Mustang it. Pointing my hand towards the terrified nobles, I snap my fingers and a large flame erupts forward and engulfs the cowardly creatures in flesh melting hellfire.

Smiling a little more at the screams I look around and see something under a table. Walking over, I look under the table and see something that disgusts me.

Blueblood.

The creature itself is hiding from me, attempting to get away from its punishment. I grab the bastard by the ear and drag him out from under the table before pulling him up to his feet and giving him a headbutt to the bridge of his nose making him fall backwards again.

"Pease don't kill me! I'll give anything you want, even leave Equestria, you name it and i'm there."

"You now what, you can go somewhere for me. Hell." with that statement, I pick up one of the few knives that were a random table. Turning back to Blueblood I think about what to do since I have no intention of doing this quickly.

"Halt! You are under arrest for multiple accounts of murder!" oh great, royal guards. More like a royal pain in the ass. With the knife I picked up I throw it on the ground. By throwing, I mean stabbed and by ground I mean Bluebloods groin.

After witnessing such a brutal display all if the guards present grimaced. With this small opening I run forward with a burst of speed and clothes line the guy that shouted because I can. With that done I keep running outward, knocking over anyone in my way, and eventually I find my way out of the building.

When I get outside I jump up on the side of the building ahead of me and kick of it with enough force to send me upward and on to the roof. Checking for any Avious guards I change back into my normal form after seeing no one around.

Deciding it's time to return to the castle I jump of the roof, landing in the middle if the street and I make my way back to the castle.

Thinking back, I smile. There were peole of all types of aspects back there. Checking for any new mutations, my smile gets wider than before.

The mutations I got are:

-Terran magic, with this I you can influence plants and animals to a degree. The more magic you gain the more control over nature you get.
-Muscle mass/Terran physiology, with the consumption of many Terrans you have gained the ability to increase the mass of your muscles.
-Avious magic, can manipulate the weather and even stand on clouds.
-Avious physiology, like an angel of death you are now capable of flight, as long as your wings are stong enough to compensate for your emense weight.
-Magi magic, with the consumption of many magi, you can now perform they're spells easier.
-Magi physiology, magi have magically conductive bones and circuitry making spells easier to do and more powerful.
-Devastation, with the amount of biomass you have absorbed you can now do a Devastation attack that is liable to kill everything short of a large dragon with incredible viral tendrils that spray everywhere in a three hundred and sixty degree and angle around you. This attack causes you to lose a chunk of your biomass.

Cool, now all I need is to kill and eat a dragon and I'll get to do some dicy moves.

Well, time to go back to the castle and hope Celestia doesn't suspect me of murdering those creatures in noble skin. I she asks me I won't deny, but if she doesn't ask, she doesn't need to know. That's how I done it back home, that's how i'll do it here.

Now to more important matters. This world isn't as safe as I had assumed, it was a naive assumption anyway. Mabye I'll go down the vigilante route.

Hahaha, time for the Red Hood to rise in Equestria.

Author's Note

No, he isn't going to become the Red Hood. Before I come up with the Vigilante name, you guys may give a suggestion, I was thinking Blacklight for his name because it makes sence.

Tell us watch you think of this chapter and if there is anything I can improve on.

After a little research with a friend you can all expect Chris to become a real powerhouse in the future, i've got surprises.

Wandering

Today is a good day. I got to kill people and mutilate someone, can't ask for anything better. Well, now that i'm back in my room I guess it's time to practice some of the things i've earned.

Sitting up on my bed I stare over at a pencil on the desk I use to draw and attempt a levitation spell. It doesn't work and it confuses me as to why, that is, until I remember something about my skills.

"Magi bones are magically cunductive." with that, I change the genes that make up my fingernails into a thin layer of unicorn bone. I try to cast the same spell again and it is somewhat successful. I managed to lift the pencil, but other than that not much happened. Seeing that I was capable of actually performing magic, I couldn't help but smile and the fact that it's levitation makes it even better, you see, most people don't see the full potential of a levitation spell, sure, it's great for picking things up, but it can do so much more. Someone pissing you off, levitate them in the air and throw them away, someone trying to kill you levitate their heart and compress it until it pops.

Finishing my levitate tirade, I look back to the pencil and with renewed determination I levi the shit out of the pencil towards me and it worked a little too well if the pencil sticking out of my chest is any indication. Pulling the pencil out, I stare at it and smile like a child. Who wouldn't, magic bitches.

After a few minutes of childishly spinning the pencil around in the air someone knocks on my door, curious as ever, I walk toward it and slowly open it. Whrn the door is fully opened I see Celestia stsnding there looking at me with a strange look.

"Sup?" I ask with a confused tilt of the head. She takes a breath before walking into my room. Without permission, rude much. At least she isn't a vampire, that would be awkward, herald of the sun and also a vampire.

"Something terrible has happened." I wander what it is, mabye it's not the slaughtering that happened. If it is why did she come to me... Unless, shit.

"Liiiiike?" when I say this, Celestia gives a slight glare, but it passes after a few seconds.

"My subjects have been killed." Sure, I kill a bunch if diamond dogs and it's all 'no sweat brah', but I kill some rapist ponies and it's all 'Why did this have to happen'

"Was there a reason? I'm no psychologist, but i'm pretty sure people try to kill for a reason." She pauses for a second, then continues.

"That brings me to the second part of the bad news. It appears my subjects have been indulging themselves in slavery." O.M.G, i'm soooo shocked. Deciding to olay the ignorant card, I gasp a little and allow my eyes to widen.

"That's disgusting, why would they ever... It was normal slavery right. Y'know, making them work endlessly without pay." If I had muscles they would have likely been forced to smile at my acting.

"Unfortunately, it was not. They were being used as objects of desire." You could just day sex slave, but whatever floats your solar powered boat.

"Gonna be honest, what i'm about to say might offend you i'm some way, but I truly believe rapists deserve a fate worse than death. Like, flaying them then rubbing salt in the wound and of course castration and whatever the female variation of that is." Looking up I notice that Celestia has a grim yet understanding look on her face.

"I... Can understand why you would feel that way. While I believe everyone is deserving if a second chance, I am, truthfully, conflicted on what to do with rapist and murderers." she's being so honest with me it's actually kinda heartwarming given the subject we are discussing.

"Well, to be fair, castration is a fitting punishment for rapists. For murderers, just stick them in prison until they die, they take a life so take theirs, if you catch my drift." I can tell that she doesn't agree with my methods, but even then she accepts them without a rebuttal.

"You seem rather torn up about it, was someone you liked, be it friend or family, involved." I already know the answer, but I want to see how honest she'll be with me.

"My nephew, Blueblood, partook in those disgusting activities." I'm kimda feeling bad for her, I was never really close to my family, like, at all so I can't quite empathize, but I do know the pain of losing someone and in this case a family member dying probably feels better thsn being betrayed by them. Again, I wouldn't know since i've never been betrayed, but still, I can try.

"Anyone else you know involved?" probably not, but still might as well play therapist while i'm here.

"A few of the castle staff, but they were all victims. I believe the maid I assigned to assist you was one of them, Swift Feather, correct?" Huh, what do you know. She remembers the name of her staff, or enough of them anyway. I can respect that, ha, mabye I'll be bowing to Celestia sooner than I thought.

"I'll have to talk to her then. That's what friends do, right? I wouldn't know considering i've only had five good friends and they were all guys, so we never help eachother all that much unless it was really bad, like, hiding from the police, bad." This seems to stun Celestia.

"You've broken the law?" She asks with a concerned voice.

"Relax, nothing major. My friends though, not so much" She's calmed down a little, but is still a bit unnerved.

"Why did you not you not tell the authorities about what they'd done?" Snitches get stiches, quite literally in my friends case as we weren't afraid to beat the shit out of eachother.

"Loyalty, I guess. If I make a good friend, I'll value them above everything else." I suppose that's one of the few things that carried over despite Blacklight numbing my emotions to the point of non-existence.

"It's good to hear you're a loyal person."... How did this conversation derail so bad. We are supposed to be talking about the crime I committed.

"Anything else you wanted to tell me or can I get back to practice?" Aw fuck, i've peaked her interest. Leave, you've spoke your peice, get the fuck out.

"Practice, for what?" my right hook if you don't get the fuck out. Now that's just rude.

"Magic." I say, levitating over my pencil and twirling it around for a bit." Random and completely unrelated thought, if I was born before friendship is magic does that mean that in this universe, i'm primordial. Huh.

"You are welcome to use the castle library anytime you want if you wish to study magic." How kind, I might just do that if eating doesn't work.

"Thanks." with that statement, she takes her leave from my room so I can bask in privacy.

After about half an hour of levitation practice, I stop and start to thing about future plans for my stay in Equestria.

First thing is to gain more magical power, I can do this by consumingthings as everything in this world is saturated in magic and after consumption that magic is added to my pool of mana. After that I plan on learning spells so I can stop relying on force. When I'm finished up with that I shoukd head to Tartarus and kill Tirek so I can learn how to eat magic. With my new ability I will then look for magical artifacts to consume as they usually have strange abilities. After all of that i'm unsure what to do.

With my half assed planning out of the way I return to practicing with magic again, only this time it witg more demanding spell than levitstion.

After an hour or so of practicing I stop after and knock on the door, I walk over and open it only to see Swift Feather in uniform which confuses me greatly. Dod she not get time off for such an event

"Heeey buddy, how ya feelin'" She looks sad for a second, for an obvious reason, then looks me right in the eyes only to freeze in shock. "You uhhh, You alright?" she takes a step back for a moment and her breathing starts quickening and over the course of the hole thing she keeps muttering 'They're the same.'. What the hell. After a few moments of this she calms down a little bit, althought she's still shaking.

"Your eyes are the same as his." That's not ominous at all.

"Whose?" I ask slowly.

"That man, the monstrous one. They just seem so hollow." I have no idea what's going on and I don't think I want to find out. That being said lets find out.

"I prefer empty." Although hollow does sound pretty cool. If my eye were hollow, what would the be, Vasto lorde.

"Were you the... Man that killed them?" that seems like a farfetched conclusion, even if it is correct. Should I tell her or no. Fuck it, why not. I pull her inside my room and close the door and walk over to her before resting my hand on her shoulder.

"Yes."

The simple answer to the question must have suprised her because see done a double take and then just stared at me.

"W-What... How?" A fair reaction ro finding out one of your friends is a murderer.

"What I'm about to tell you is for this room only because if you tell anyone they'll just say you're delusional. So it's for your own good." I stop to look at her and she nods her head in confirmation. I woild have preferred to hear her promise, ah well. "I'm actually a shape-shifting virus." at this she just stares at me in disbelief.

"Really?" that went better than expected. To prove my point I shift into Red Crest again then turn back moments after. All Swift is doing is standing there blinking owlishly.

"Told ya. Pretty freaky, right?" All she does is nod. Fairly certain I just blew her mind. Since she's likely going to be like that for a while, I pick her up and set her on my bed. Since I have nothing to do, I leave my room and decide to wander the castle a little more. I keep this up until I find my way out of the castle and into its gardens. Looking around, I see that the garden is filled with statues with different descriptions on them. I continue to look at them until I come across one of a man... Yawning or laughing, kind of hard to tell, with it being a statue. The description of the statue said that this was supposed to represent discord and since this one means Discord it means that Discord is still imprisoned and judging by the position he's in, it would seem that i'm within season one unless the timeline is fucked.

Looking at the statue again, I begin to notice the differences between the Draconequues and this man. Where Discord had brown fur this man was wearing a brown over coat, instead if a lion paw his entire right arm seemed to be covered in plate armour, his bird talon left arm I replaced with a torn sleeve and an arm covered in bandages, he had normal trousers, that may be because he's all grey though, his normally hooved left leg had a boot on it while his right leg had a scaled cowboy boot on the other. On his back where his pegasus and bat wings.

After I finish admiring the statue I back away and return to the castle, quite content. At least I learned that I should be in season one meaning I have a small window before Discord escapes and gets resealed. That gives me some time to prepare and and try to come up with a plan to get Dicords DNA. I'll just shake his hand, after all Discirds isn't really a bad guy, just a fun loving mad man.

Moving on, I walk back to the castle humming the tune of a song called circles, petty good song if I do say so myself. As ilenter the castle I have no idea what i'm going to do. So being as inquisitive as I am I find my way back out into the city and go exploring since that's all I can do.

After a small while I find myself in a familiar Street, specifically the one where the slavers worked. Looking over I see that there aren't any guards inspecting the place. Being as deductive as ever I wander over to the ally and enter the building again, noring that it looks like it's been almost completely cleaned out of anything possibly suspicious. I finally find myself in the main area agsin and the smell of blood hits me rather hard which means that eithee my sense of smell is better than I thought or it wasn't fully washed out. Pausing a bit I take a deeper breath and to my suprise there is an insect smell, it's hard to describe, but it's definitely insect. That means that my theory was likely correct and changelings were in charge of this whole thing. The wonderous feeling of cold fury burns through me for a few sexonds before dissappearing.

"I should get the lucky couple something for their wedding. A few gallons of pesticide should be appreciated." with a small chuckle I look around the room in mire det and unfortunately, I don't find anything worth while meaning the royal guard are at least somewhat competent when cleaeing out a building for evidence. As I walk around I notice something off about a section of one of the walls. Walkimg up to it I tap on it and it makes an echoing sound. Smiling to myself, rear my arm back and punch forward, destroying the wall. I look behind the wall and see two safes, one bigger than the other. Tearing the biggest ine open I see it has a large deposit of bits inside it, can't do anything about it though, never brought a bag. I tear open the second one and I see some books, opening them I notice they're record books, full of names, dates and mony paid.

"It would seem that I have some blackmail material. Using it would be cheating though. I'll just give it to the guard... After reading through it course." with that I opened the first of many record books and memorised the names in them just incase I hear about people with matching names.

When I finish with the books I leave the building, but not before putting on a random disguise. With my new look I ealk around with the records until I see one of the royal guards. I walk up to him until i'm infront of him, he looks at me with a raised eyebrow, but before he says anything I hold out the records.

"I believe your superiors will appreciate these." without fiving him much if a chance to do anything I hand over the records and out of reflex he grabs them without question. Deciding that i've done enough good today, I return to the castle, not allowing the guard to ask anything.

Looking up to the sky, I see thst the sun is meeting the horizon. I stare at it for a while not quite sure how it's becoming night so soon. "Must have spent a lot of time exploring than I thought." with that I enter the caslte and make my way back to my room. As I arrive I see that the door is open a bit which is seriously unhealthy for my paranoia.

I walk up to the door and peer through the crack, but I can see anything. Since I could likely unalive anything inside I just open the door like I would any other day. When I enter I hear a sqeak, quite loud so it likely wasn't a mouse. Looking over to where it came from I see swift there, reading the comic that I drew for fun. We stare at eachother for a bit, she looking rather pale and me with a amused smile.

"W-who are you?" what weird question, why would she as- Oooh. I forgot to change back from my disguise. Doing just thst I get another fearful squek from her.

"Relax, i'm not going to eat you." Mabye, probably, most likely. She looks at me with a confused expression before slowly nodding. Huh, she took that better than the entirety of Manhattan. Good for her.

"What was that?" Did I not already tell her earlier, pretty sure I did. Then agian, shape shifting virus isn't much of an explanation.

"I can shape shift. Magic an' all." probably best not to tell her i'm a walking apocalypse. Enlightenment can drive you mad, after all.

"Oh, I figured you were a Terran." have not used any form of magic in front of her before. Now that I think about it, I don't believe so.

"Nah. I'm a magi or whatever. Still not sure which one." all of them, if life goes my way.

"How do you not know, you find out when you're born." Did you just assume my species, you bigoted fool. He, can't go wrong with jokes about those... people, if they assoc with the term people, that is. Fuckin' weird.

"I was born looong before you people had aspects if a certain creature. I'm basically prehistoric compared to you." MLP G4 was made in 2010, I think. So I'm roughly seventeen years older than the show. Good to know.

"Wow. So... You're older than the princesses?" Why does everyone believe me so easily. Not gonna complain, it's rude to deny a gift. Wait, Swift counts as a witness.

"Complete change of subje, but would you mind watching as I change my face?" Alright, she's confused, a fair emotion to feel considering thw question.

"What?" she asks, with an incredulous tone.

"Yeah, i'm kind if borrowing someone else's face, so I was planning to change it and I want a witness so someone can vouch me when I need to explain who I am." she she hums in understanding, with that I walk over to to a mirror and look over myself. After a few moments of thinking I come to a conclusion of what I want to to look like.

When i'm done I hear a small gasp behind me and I see swift looking at me in shock. Probably didn't expect it to be so quick or for it to work. I look at myself in the mirror and tske in my appearance. My hair is all brushed over to the side and yet still quite messy and it colour changed to an ashen/grey, it kinda looks like a white haired version of Heath Ledher's Joker a little bit. Speaking of Joker my skin is a little paler than it used to be. And the last major detail is that my eyes have turned from brown to a dull blue.

"Well, what do you think?" I ask Swift, for a moment I didn't think she was going to answer, but eventually finds her voice.

"Better than the last one." ooh~ a compliment, how kind. It's probably because of the hair being slightly more 'Out there' by normal human standards, meaning that it fits in with Equestria a little more.

"Thank you. Now then, as much as I enjoy your company, I feeling bored so i'm going to sleep it off. So you can either leave or join me, don't quite mind either one." it was ment to be a joke, but I have a feeling she thinks i'm serious or she's coming down with a fever from hell, cause her face is more red than the streets of Ponyville when I was clearing out the dogs. Not giving her much of a chance to answer I jump on the bed which was a risky move considering my weight.

"I your going to leave you can take the comic book and finish it." with my piece said and done I clock out only to enter a familiar void.

"Want some pudding?"

A familiar face

"I'm going to take your silence as a no. Shame, I got this pudding from Neptune so you know it's gon be gud. Then again, you probably don't know who she is, so my word likely means less than a bottle of air, minus the bottle." I honestly have no clue what this guy is talking about, but i'm going to assume it's nothing important.

"Do you need anything or is this just a social call?" Might as well get this over with.

"Bit o' Both, really. Being around me tends to weird things to people, kinda like getting superpowers." I wonder if there is actually a point to all this, it's a little scary knowing that there is someone as supposedly powerful as this man in existence.

"Oh, come on. You don't live long enough to watch THE God, create the universe and not go a little mad. Oh yeah, God made angels before the universe, just sayin'." Alright, so he's really old, unfortunately he isn't one if those cryptic, yet wise old people, but the powerful, yet mad.

"Anyway, back to business my ever evolving friend/experiment." he sure does like to take his time. Then again, if he's as old as he says he is then he has nothing, but time.

"I've come to realise that you aren't anywhere near as fun enough yet. So i'm giving you more things, don't ask what they are though, it's a suprise. To find out you'll need to experiment with the knowledge you have from games, movies and other shit like that for super happy fun times." what the hell, I've killed hundreds of people in mearly two days and i'm not fun, this guys has gone full psycho.

"You try having almost no interest in sex and then being 'aggressively persuaded' to live through both Corruption of Champions and trials in tainted space. I can assure you that it's confusing as shit trying to figure out what to do. Even more confusing as to why people have sex for any reason other than reproduction. I mean seriously, what the fuck." so he's going on a rant now, that's certainly interesting. Though he does raise a good point, why do people have sex for any reason aside from reproduction.

"Speaking of sex. You have any kids?" I ask 'cause why the hell not. The guy is older than the universe and he's lived through both those games, if he doesn't have a kid i'd be surprised.

"Sure i've had children, granted none of them had immortality because they were born from a mortal, but they're still my kids." I am confused, if my science is correct then a child get the dominant traits from both their parents. Immortality seem like a dominant trait, apparently not.

"Anyway we've went off topic, basically i'm giving you cool shit and you need to unlock ro get. Also check under your bed, there are some neat lil' trinkets in a box under there." Ah sweet, this guy would make a pretty great element of generosity.

"No I wouldn't. I'm giving you these thing because i've nothing to do with them and i'd rather not become a hoarder, so i'm pretty much using you as a bin." he could have destroyed them for fun.

"I could have, but that isn't productive, now, is it?" Alright he wins. Recycling rather than wasting, go green and all that crap.

"Soooo~ you gonna tell me your name yet?" just remembered that I don't even know the guys name.

"Can I trust you?" what a stupid question, this guy has given me superpowers and he keeps giving me more stuff, i'd bomb an orphanage for the guy.

"Please don't, i'm not fond of children, but Karma and Miss fortune would have my ass if they found out I was the reason you killed a bunch of children." Well shit, those two are living creatures, who would have guessed. "Anyway, my birth name is Elerial, but these days I go by Loki since Elerial sounds too serious for my taste." so he went through a name change, neat-o

"Capital. Well, it's nice to meet you Loki." not how I usually do introductions, but meh.

"Sure bud. Real nice to meet you to." Why do I get the feeling he doesn't really care that much. "That's just just Sloth talking, ignore it." who's Sloth, well it's a sin for a start. Mabye he has a relationship with that certain sin.

"Who's Sloth?" I ask out of curiosity, heh, mabye he has a voice in his head called sloth.

"Sloth is just one of my many, many titles. Sloth the Indolent, I get power from doing nothing exerting. Grif would love my job." i'm sure a lot of people would like it. Immortality plus gaining power by doing nothing. Just go to sleep for a few thousand years and then your unbeatable.

"That all or is there anything else you want to tell me?" I ask hoping to see if I can get anything else from him.

"Not right know, but if remember anything I can just invade your dreams anytime I want." Well that's upsetting, but not unacceptable.

"Well, c'ya Loki." Wonder what I got from him. Penance stare, power of the warp, pokémon summoning. I like that last one.

"Bye, congrats on deballing Blueblood by the way. I turn him into a girl a while back for funzies, check up on... Bluebell for us would ya." and with that he's gone, wait what the fuck, he turned Blueblood into a girl, ha. That has to be some sort of karma.

With the disappearance of Loki the word me started to collapse in on itself until all that was left was a starry void with a letter floating in front of me. I open the letter and read what's inide if it. In large fancy writing the letter states You can lucid dream Now, isn't that a blast.not entirely sure how to intemperate that I just shrug and allow my thoughts to drift off until I se the world around me change and infront of me are people with various different powers like superman or thor. This is likely due to me thinking about them considering I can apparently lucid dream now. Not really sure as to what I should do I just wander the rows upon rows of superpowered beings.

The world around me starts to properly fall apart this time just as I walk past Doomsday. I take this as a sign that i'm returning to consciousness and allow the world to fall apart. Have to say watching the world crack open and shatter like glass was a quite beautiful. Certainly wouldn't mind the world ending if it looked as good as that.

As I regain my senses I feel something off about waking up, it's probably nothing, but the large amount of heat on my left side says otherwise. Opening my eyes amd turning to see the problem I am greeted by something unusual... Or should I say someone. Yep, that's right. It would appear that Swift didn't realise I was joking or she did and is turning the joke against me. On the bright side this probably means she trusts me, on the not-so-bright side it could mean something else, but i'm not going to get into that.

After thinking a few different possibilities I decide to leave it at that and get out of bed. As my feet hit the cold floor I remember that i've got a present under the bed, so looking under it, I see loads of boxes and all of them are pretty big. Grabbing the first one, I open it and the contents suprise me.

Sitting in there is a PS4 with various equipment likely meant to power the machine. Along with that are a few games that I haven't played in a while alongside games that shouldn't be out yet, then again, I suspect Loki can time travel. If I had tear ducts I would cry, but alas I can't so I shan't. Before I close the box I see a letter attached to it so being myself I opened it and it read.

Dear Chris,

Interdimensional Multiplayer included since I can.

Yours sincerely,

Loki Magnus

I think my body just generated tear ducts for the sole purpose of crying at this very moment because I can feel something wet travel down my face. It's weird, crying and smiling, like those two things shouldn't happen at the same time and yet they do.

Still grinning like a certain cat I put that box back under the bed for use later. I grab another box from under the bed and open this one which gives me another suprise.

It's... Somehow the Arkham knight armour only missing the blue helmet and instead is the Red Hood one that is supposed to be under it. My main question is how it fit inside the box, but hell, if Loki can time travel who's to say he can't Tardis-ify boxes.

I close this box, with everything inside it, and return it back under my bed. I was going to go for another box, but I was interrupted by Swift Feather stirring in her rest.

I turn around to see her slowly wake up. It would seem she hasn't noticed me yet which is pretty hard to considering i'm right in front if her, but she does look ready to die.

"Morning, Swifty." What do you know, she's instantly awake and fully alert.

"I'm so sorry, I don't know how I got in your bed, but please forgive me!" She doesn't remember, hehe, it's time for ol' fashioned prank.

"Oh, don't apologise, you were simply wonderful last night. I had no idea someone could be so submissive." This could be mean and insensitive considering what happened yesterday, but the look on her face is worth it.

"Y-you mean... We..." Huh, she seems shell shocked, I think. Okay mabye not, her smile is creeping me the fuck out.

"S-suprise, just a prank brah." I don't feel nearly as confident as I did starting this, that smile promises all kinds of hell, kinky hell. The worst kind, for me anyway can't say the same for other people. Deciding to save my ass, quite literally, I leave my room for the safety of the hallway.

Remembering the route Swift shown me yesterday, I walk towards the dining room that Celestia was in. After a few minutes of getting admiring the castle architecture I make it there in time to see a tired Luna leaving. She looks up and nods before trudging her way towards her room.

Walking into the hall I see Celestia sitting there with her ever present smile. I seems to get a little wider upon seeing me enter.

"Good morning, Chris." Is it a good morning though. Yes and no.

"Good is subjective, I have the distinct feeling that Swift may want to have a piece of my ass." I say and Celestia just raises an eyebrow with a somewhat concerned look that's bordered with amusement.

"How did you come about this information?" oh you know she smiled a creepy smile.

"Well, I played a bit of a prank on her. You see she stayed the night in my room, don't ask why, and when she woke up she didn't remember how she ended up in my bed. Thinking it would be funny I heavily insinuated that we had sex. After saying this she went quiet then started smiling with this really creepy smile." I don't think Celestia cares if her laughing at me has any indication, this isn't even a reserved giggle either, this is full blown I'm suffocating laughter' That may be taking it too far, but it's close enough to the truth.

"You hehe, you may want to clear that up." No shit sherlock, but how does one say... You know what, she's a smart girl. She'll remember what happened and realise I was joking with her so worrying is uncalled for.

"My inevitable rape aside, may I ask when this ceremony thing is going to happen?" please tell it's going to be soon, I can't stand waiting for things.

"Later today, it's set for seven in the evening." dear merciful God, kill me. That's too long. What can I do to pass the time, open boxes, hell yeah. There was a shit ton of them under my bed.

"Capital. Anyone noteworthy going to be there?" Might as well scope out the nobles who are likely to come.

"Most of Canterlot nobility are foing ti be attending. You should look out for Fancy Pants as he is one of the few Knights we currently have. I'm fairly certain my student and her friends are going to be coming as well." Another knight, would be nice to talk to someone with the title and learn about what he's done as a knight to understand more about my job.

"Anything else?" I ask, might as well cover all my bearings while i'm here.

"A lot if nobles will likely try and gain your attention if they believe you are worth it. I'm also certain some celebrities are going to come as well." getting my attention isn't that hard,it's keeping it that's the problem.

"I had no idea I was popular enough for celebrities to attend." probably just a bunch of self entitled jerkoffs anyway.

"It isn't everyday a lone man saves an entire town from destruction." so they just want to be seen with a 'hero' to boost their reputation. Who new I was such a pessimistic person.

"Fair enough. Well, i've bothered you enough. I'll just go and check up on Swift, see if she's still in my room." As I leave I can hear Celestia laughing at my misfortune.

The walk back to my room was slow and calm. With such a state if peacefulness I can't help but let my mind wander about what Loki said earlier. Looks like I have even more powers now, with the only problem being I can't use them since he wouldn't tell me what they are but I have to guess they have to do with my current theme of games and shows. It would seem like Loki wants me to become as overpowered as possible now which is weird because with my first meeting he cut it short saying I was too strong with Blacklight. I have a feeling he wants to use me for something because he's freely giving away so many things, then again it could be a few small abilities that can't di anything making this entire dialog unnecessary. I was going to think on this more but it would seem that I have arrived at my room.

Slowly opening the door, I look around and see that Swift hasn't moved from her position yet. I walk in cautiously and make my way over to the maid,tapping her ob tje shouder. The gentle tapping doesn't seem to to work so I go to do it again only for her to turn around before I can. Resting my hand at my saide again, I look down at her with a natural expression.

"You can be mean sometimes, you kniw that right?" it would appear her memory has returned and with ita sense of deja vu. Didn't Screw Ball ask the same thing.

"Yeah, sorry about that, but an opportunity for fun appeared and I took it. No harm done anyway, right? You don't seem like the type of person who would hold a grudge for something so petty." This is getting way to emotional, granted my face is still passive and my voice monotone, but I can't help but feel strange, a strange, strange, that makes even the strangest of strange seem normal.

"Well, don't do it again. I was terrified that something actually happened." I can't help but feel a little insulted at that.

"I'm Really feelin' the love right now." That sounded petty and sarcastic, I think

"That's not what I meant. It's just that i'm nowhere near ready for taking care of a child. So I I just sort have freaked out when you said what you said." That makes sense, now that I think about it. Do I even have a dick? I mean, I don't feel it at all. I'm certainly under reacting about the fact I lost my jewels.

"Alright then, no more sex pranks, for you anyway." I wonder if Celestia likes pranks

"I think i've spent more than enought time in your room, so i'll see you later." I she going to be appearing at the ceremony, cool. I wonder if Spike is going to be there.

"I'll be seein' you then." with that out of the way I walk back over to my bed and pull out a few of the boxes from under it.

I open the closest one to me and to my surprise there is a inside it.i pick it up abd stare at it for a small while, thinking about what it might be able to do. In the middle of looking at the cross guard I suddenly recognise the blade. Realising what it is I accidentally drop it.

It's Azreals' blade from Lucifer. A weapon so strong it literally erases your essence from existence, preventing you from going to heaven or hell. I decide i'm too careless to wield something like that I place it back in its box.

Looking over yhwe other boxes, I can't help but feel a little nervous. If Loki is willingly giving away Azreals blade then there is no telling just what might be in them. Going for another box, albeit with more caution than the previous one.

Opening it, i'm not even surprised. Sitting at the botton if the box is a metal sword hilt with a few ridges going along it and underneath the hilt is a robe. Picking the hilt up I look it over in more detail and notice that there is a button on tge side of it. Preesing the button a large blade erupts from the top of the hilt. The blade is as black as the void, the sword is also being highlighted by a white light. I can't help but chuckle at the weapon in my hands, it's the darksaber, the only lightsaber to have a black crystal. I'm pretty sure that's true anyway. Deactivating it I wonder where i'm going to put it as I want to keep it on my person so I can actually use it.

After thinking about wanting to put it away the saber disappears in a flash causing me to stare in confusion and a bit of disappointment. I new it was a false hope but I tried to will it back since it would have made an excellent weapon. Then to my surprise and relief it reappears it my hand.

I stop to think for a second. Then I try to will the saber away again and it works, the angular blade dissappears from my grip only to be returned after wishing it back.

"Is this one of my new abilities, a personal arsenal or inventory, like a game." thinking about it, it makes a lit of sence and it's going to be hella useful." I take the boxes that I have already opened, take everything out, being extra careful with Azreals blade, and will them all into my new inventory.

With a happy sigh I grab the next box for today and open it. To my disappointment, all that is inside the TARDIS box is a couple of fruit baskets. I pull one out and grab a fruit. The moment I pick it uo I feel something wrong with it, like the Devil himself made the fruits. Pausing for a moment, I begin to laugh.

"Haha, Devil fruits. Never would have thought of that." I stare at the fruit in my grasp and start breaking it down with biomass. After its consumption I begin to filter through all if its genetic components before finding what i'm looking for.

To my great pleasure I can announce that this Devil fruit is the Ope Ope no Mi, Laws Devil fruit. Meaning I can create spherical barriers in which I control everything inside it with some type of spacial manipulation.

I don't consume the other fruits right away as I decide that I might as well see if I can find people to give certain fruits to. Hope they don't like swimming.

After adding all of the fruits to my new inventory I decide to mess around with my new ability, after all the best way ti kearn something is to submerge yourself in it. Quickly leaving my room, I try and find some people to experiment on.

Mabye this wait isn't going to be so bad after all.

Author's Note

I don't really now why I let Chris have more power, but I don't really care. More power equals more ways to kill things, after all.
There are still a few boxes left, feel free to comment if you want Chris to have a specific item.

Knighthood and noble-ness

Ope Ope no Mi = top banter

Seriously, it's fun as fuck to create your own personal universe that overlaps the one you're currently in and you get to control everything inside it. I'll admit it was a little difficult to get the hang of at first, but having abilities to manipulate space and time to a degree shouldn't be easy to control without quite a bit of practice.

Anyways, I currently find myself walking through Canterlot, y'know as you do. Only to come across a... Shall we say not entirely clean house. It doesn't look like it belongs in Canterlot anyway, it might fit in with another city like anywhere, but Canterlot. Somewhat recognising it, I allow myself a smile.

"It's time to dance with the moon." walking over to the house I knock on the door and wait for a little. Seeing no progress I knock again. "I can stay here for at the most five more hours, I can assure you, I can be incredibly stubborn when I want to be." I didn't expect that to work, but what do you know, it did.

"What do you want?" I sense anger and sadness. How can I sense these things? I'm not a changeling.

"I say as your house and was like "Whoever lives there must be a sad person." and what do you know, i'm right. Sooo, you going to tell good ol' unlce Licht what's up?" Why am I trying to do this again. Is it because it took Twilight five seas, mabye. Is it because I actually care about the well being of other people, certainly not. In all likelihood, it because I. AM. SO. FUCKING. BORED.

"Why should I tell a complete stranger anything?" thus Moon Dancer lass sure uas a good head on her shoulders.

"My name is Chris Licht, I currently reside inside the castle, I like understanding things down to the molecular level and right know I only have two definite friends. What do you say, want to be lucky number three." I think I can hear her defeat, hahey, true human persistence strikes again.

The door of her house opens and I finally see what the human Moon Dancer looks like.

She has Red hair with two purple highlights of different shades that is also tied upward and not like a ponytail, this literally pointing up to the sky, purple eyes surrounded by thick, rimmed, Black glasses. She is wearing a dark grey/blue turtle neck sweater and has a black skirt that ends just above her knees. On her feet are a pair of black, possibly artificial leather, school shoes.

Overall, she's looks like a serious book nerd, but that was to be expected, this is someone who saw Twilight Sparkle as a role model. She also doesn't seem completely livid meaning that her hatred for Twilight hasn't completely cemented yet, that's good. I'm won't do anything about it though, if someone blew if any of my parties for anything short of they literally died, I wouldn't be too happy with them either. Question is, does saving the world from eternal night giver her a pass, probably.

"Are you going to come then?" Huh, she's letting me in. Ha, I'm making more progress than. Granted, she doesn't hate me like does and or will Twilight. Walking forward, I take a step into her house and follow her into her living room/library thing. "You wanted to talk about something?" I'll admit this might get annoying.

"You seem depressed, figured I'd help." True enough. Hell, if Moon Dancer becomes interesting enough I may even give her a devil fruit. What one would I give her, though.

"I don't need help. You are just wasting you're time." That's kind if the point. Ope Ope no Mi is fun and all, but I get bored easily, too easily and i'm almost certain yhe princesses wouldn't appreciate their subjects disappearing.

"How about this, I let you... Study my abilities before Twilight and if that doesn't work I owe you a favour." Of course, i'm talking about light not blacklight or bending or my new spacial control.

"What do you mean Twilight?" I new that would catch your interest.

"Twilight Sparkle, you might know her. She is Canterlot, after all." If that glare has anything to go by she knows what i'm talking about.

"I know her. I can't say I like her that much." she didn't want my help and yet you mention the cause of her problem and she starts talking.

"What did she do?" it's shicking how good I am at faking sympathy. I should take up acting classes.

"I was having a party thrown and out of all my friends, I was hoping Twilight would show up, but instead she blew it off like it didn't even matter!" This is getting dicey and loud.

"Do you know why she didn't come?" I can't believe i'm doing Twilights job. This isn't my friend andbshe has nothing to do with me and yet I help anyway.

"Appearantly she had an assignment from the Princess." she knows thst much, more knowledge than I thought she would have.

Did you know... That it was Twilight and a few other individuals that stopped Nightmare Moon from bringing about eternal night." Best nit say she made new friends otherwise Moon Dancer might flip shit and no one wants that. Especially the clean freaks. "Celestia also gave her a permanent residence in Ponyville for some reason." it isn't lying it's omitting details for the sake of getting what I want.

"I didn't know that. I never expected Twilight of all people to save Equestria." Moon is being unexpectedly trusting, great. Makes my job far easier than it has any right to be.

"Yeah, people can be surprising. Here's a surprise for you. Did you know that i'm being knighted later today and Twilights likely going to be there." I have no idea if you need a ticket to join an event like a knighting, but I would hope not, I mean, I would give everybody the chance to meet the people who are supposed to protect their country.

"I'll see if I can make it there." Why is she so trusting... does it really matter.

"Wunderbar. Well, I gotta do stuff. Like getting clothes for this event and some other things. See you there." making my way to the door I think back on if just leaving like that was rude, likely. "Oh, yeah. One Last thing, if you somehow have any friends, invite them as well." If I wasn't rude before, I definatly am now.

Leaving her house, I walk the streets of Canterlot trying to think if I should change what i'm wearing for the sake of the knighting. I settle on yes.

I'm currently sitting in my room and think on when this thing is actually going to start. To stave off my boredom I look towards the boxes that have been left over, there's a lot of them.

Walking over to one of them I pull it open and see another weapon. At first, it looks like a gold and red Lance of some sort, but anyone that's an anime fan would recognise this sword to some extent.

Ea

Loki sure does like overpowered weaponry, you just have to wonder how strong Loki is when he considers a sword, that is rumoured to be the embodiment of God, a piece of garbage that he can just throw away. I mean, i'm just holding the thing i and I can feel it's power pumping through my body. Either way, I can't help but smile, if the swords rumours are indeed true then I have a literal God in my hands.

Feeling genuinely excited about the boxes of power I move on to another one. Opening it if find something that I legitimately did not expect.

An Omnitrix.

I say an Omnitrix because it doesn't look like any of the variations that I have seen. This one is primarily grey with an orange tint and the part that glows is also orange. Looks good, to be honest. Reaching out I realise that this doesn't latch onto my arm so I place it on like you would anyother watch. The moment I put it on the watch there is a hiss and it clamps down over my left arm and speaks.

"Versatrix online - scanning weilder - Blacklight: Evolutionary chimaric mutation, an infectious agent that can reproduce only inside the living cells of other biological organisms. The synthetic female voice tells me.

"What's a Versatrix?" is it wrong of me to assume it can talk to me.

"A Versatrix, like the Omnitrix, is capable of turning the wearer into different beings, only the Versatrix does it from across many universes, unlike the Omnitrix, it can also turn you into other people from the same species as long as they are scanned. Again, unlike the Omnitrix that is designed for knowledge and understanding, the Versatrix is designed with combat in mind. Another thing to note is that the beings you transform into are not personalised like and Omnitrix. When you turn into something you become them with your mind in place instead of their own." Alright, so it's a tool for war rather than knowledge. I can get behind that, I don't understand the feature for turning into people from the same species, but whatever.

"Give an example of what I can become." If what it is saying is true then I can become different people without the need to consume.

"Alduin, Ulquiora Cifer, Galen Marek, Kaneki Ken, Lancelot (Berzerker) and all Jinchuriki to name a small few." thats pretty cool and yet there is even more where that came from.

"I've noticed that all of the people you have told me are male, i'm assuming I can't take female forms then?" a valid question, there is a shit ton of highly destructive girls out there.

"Incorrect, you may take on a female form. Seras Victoria, Cinder Fall and Undyne are females forms you may take." fair enough, need that Gender equality people.

"Thanks for the information, Verse." That's right, I named it, Sue me.

"Not a problem, Sir." what a well mannered A.I.

*Knock knock*

"It's open!" I shout at the person on the other side of the door and to my pleasant not-so-suprise is Swift standing there, honestly it's like she's my personal maid. I'm not against that.

"Princess Celestia has requested to your presence in the ball room." ball room? It is bigger and I guess if someone where to get knighted there might be a party... Social gathering, the place is going to be full of nobles.

"Sweetness. Lemme gets more appropriate clothing on." I walk over to the mirror and change my current clothes to that of a basic suit minus the blazer and with a suit vest. It has a white and green colouration, as I said, basic. "Lets-a go." I say, channeling my inner Italian.

"Of course." How bland, she seems to have dulled down. I hope it wasn't the prank, surprisingly enough I already consider the girl a friend, meaning her life automatically more valuable than mine. Then again I can't die, well, i'm very hard to kill. Either way, a life is an adventure and all adventures end inevitably and unfortunately someone else has to end mine. Enough with this sad shit, I get it, I get depressing sometimes, but that was way to philosophical and depressing for me.

After a good while of walking in silence I suddenly realised something, no rehearsals. I get that this isn't a wedding or anything, but still. I have no idea what to expect. That might be the reason, if you don't know what to expect everything you say will be from the heart because you don't have a predetermined answer for everything thst happens, Heh, Celestia may not actively defend her Kingdom, but I must admit she has the mind of an veteran chess master and then some.

Looking out one of the windows, I see a large amount of nobles making there way inside the castle, good thing i've never had stage fright.

Eventually we make it to the ball room and outside of it are two guards, standing there like the bland and boring statues like always.

"Well, I'll be seeing you later, Chris. Good luck in there." she isn't coming in, so sad. Ah well. Call me noble 6 because I've watched all my friends die in separate occasi- FUCK OFF DEPRESSION. Jesus fucking Christ, can't a guy go a full year without reminding himself of shit like that.

Anyway. As I approach, the guards open the door and I walk inside only to see abroom full of nobles, standing off to the sides of the room to allow me a straight line up to Celestia. Speaking if, she's standing there with that smile, y'know the serene, i'm everyones mother type smile.

I decide it would be best to walk forward so with my hands behind my back and head held high, I begin my one man march toward the stage that Celestia is using. I won't say i'm nervous, but I will say i'm uneasy, paranoia keeps people alive after all. Finally after about half a minute I make it to the stage.

Walking up it I stand infront of Celestia, I stare her in the eyes and unfortunately I know what I am meant to do. Begrudgingly, I lower myself until i'm on my right knee, bowing to Celestia. This sickens me.

"People of Canterlot and beyond, may I present to you all Chris Licht, Warrior of light and most importantly, hero of Ponyville." Oh shit, someone wants to fuel the hype train. "This man single handedly defeated an force of five hundred diamond dogs from taking everybody from Ponyville and forcing them to work in their horrid mines." lets be honest, the demon was planning to kill them all, but we can't have that becoming public knowledge. "So today we are to honour this brave soul with the titles noble and knight." A round of applause, expected yet loud, too loud.

"Chris Licht, do you vow to protect Equestria and everyone in it with your life?" I think she has this backwards, don't you ask these questions first and then tell everyone about the titles. Fuck it.

"I do." I here by announce you husband and wife, hahaha.

"Do you vow to uphold the law and bring justice to those who are deserving." ye, a special justice called kill everything.

"I do."

"It's going to be so hard to have real fun when everyone knows my face, oh wait, I can change that. Next question is where is Luna, I feel like she doesn't like me. Offering me a job then never talking to me, rude much.

"Then, as of now, you shall be known as Chris Licht, noble of Equstria and knight of light." Now here's a question. Back in medieval Europe, wasn't the rank of knight on par or higher than noble or am I completely wrong.

"It's an honour, Princess." so much formality, so dull. Kill me... Again.

"Now then everyone, please, enjoy yourselves." Thank the almighty Gods it's over. It was shorter than I thought. I was expecting to kneel there for about an hour or so.

"That wasn't so bad, now was it." Celestia, I should flay you, but your interesting, in a harmonic way. So your boring, but not.

"No, it wasn'ea that bad. Shorter than I figured." welll, that drew a giggle from Celestia

"That's what they all say. I assume you wish to mingle with everyone." Not really, I kinda want to give the Versatrix a spin.

"No, but i'm going to do it anyway because I find self-harming to hilarious." at least Blueblood won't be here. Now that I think about it, Loki said he turned him to a girl for whatever reason. Not like he had a dick anymore. It was probably a sympathetic favour.

Walking down from the stage I walk about the hall, waiting for someone to approach me. It took longer than I thought, but it eventually happened, only it was by Spike. Awesome.

"Hey bud, how you doing?" je looks depressed. This is in season one and we aren't at the Gala. Spike is likely upset right now because he didn't get to show his friends around the the castle and parts of Canterlot, similar to how he got upset at the Gala when he got ditched by everyone.

"Everyone left before I could show them around, like I wanted." I'd pity you, but you wouldn't like that.

"I'm not doing anything, aside from dying of boredom." I haven't even managed to live past my human life expectancy yet and this bored. I dread the possible centuries to come.

"Do you want to just hang out then? We don't have to leave here since this is your party, but we could just talk." better than what I was planning anyway.

"That sounds pretty good. Wanna learn how to fight?" yep, that took him by surprise. " Not now, obviously, in the future, Besides, it's good to know how to fight. Builds character... Or is that discipline." knowing how to fight is important for something. Not dying, that's it.

"I-I guess, if you're willing to teach. How hard can it be." Hello Murphy... Yeah... His name's Spike, a young boy with a dragon aspect... Kind if broke a universal rule, your one to be precise... Thanks, bye.

"Sure bud. Now then, lets suffer through this horrible waste of time together." Hmm, I told Swift, might as well tell Spike. "Hey Spike?"

"Yeah?"

"Did you know, that i'm a virus capable of shape-shifting and eating people whole while gaining their memories because of said consumption." I don't think he believes me, ah well. He's not getting a public showing.

"Oookay? That's cool, I guess." definitely doesn't believe me.

"Anyway, lets get started."

Finally, it's over. I'm a little upset that Spike didn't get a chance to stay long. Left about halfway through and left me to deal with the nobles. The weren't as bad as I was expecting, but the were still self-obsessed pricks.

Looking around I seeb Celestia beckoning me over to her. Feeling as bad as I am, I took my sweet time walking to her. I got there eventually.

"Yo, wot can I do ye fir." Needless to say, I got a raised eybrow for the weird accent.

"I just needed to tell you that mist Knights are often placed in towns or cities outside of Canterlot I was wondering where you would like to be be stationed?" Might as well go with what she secretly wants.

"I'll stick with Ponyville, i've there before and it's beside the Everfree meaning that it needs constant protection." Celestia, you shouldn't smirk like yhat around people who know you.

"In that case, the is a house already available for you. Here's the address." A little piece of paper, hope I don't lose it. "Your home also has some servants there to help you with cleaning." she definitely planned this, it's 100% obvious now.

"Thank you, I'll try not to burn the place to the ground. Ha, I guess that's what the staff are for." or to spy on me, it's incredibly doubtful that Celestia fully trusts me. Speaking of moving to Ponyville, i'm starting to feel like a fanfiction protagonist. Now that's a scary thought.

After a little bit of smalltalk we said our goodbyes and made are way to our respective rooms and settle in for the night. Well, Celestia did anyway.

"How the fuck am I suppose to get the boxes of almighty power back to Ponyville." and with that brand new dilemma, Chris found out that he doesn't actually need to sleep.

Author's Note

Honestly I don't know what to wright here.
There are still boxes of supreme hyper fuck-shitery. So if there is anything weapon ir otherwise you want Chris to have and he can have it.
Remember to point out my mistakes so they can be fixed at somepoint in the future.

The Versatrix is fun

I'm really fuckin' special.

Retard special not good special.

I spent an entire night awake planning on how to move the boxes of badassitude to my new home in Ponyville. It took me roughly six hours to realise I could just use my inventory/pocket dimension to store the boxes with no weight gain at all. Have to thank Loki for that secret ability he bestowed upon me.

Honestly, I don't even know why i'm bothering to learn magic in whatever spare time I have when I take into account all the other secret abilities and my current ones. Ah right, the answer is power and my subsequent corruption. Absolute power, corrupts absolutely, after all.

What time should I head to Ponyville at. I could go now. Leave a letter for the princesses and just leave, but that would be rude. I'll go to the dining hall again and speak with Celestia, mabye Luna if she's there.

To breakfast then Ponyville. Can't say i've missed the place, then again, I was only there for a few hours short of a day. Mabye Spike and the other girls stayed the night here, could get the train with them. Good idea me.

You're welcome

Fuck off.

Anyway, before I was interrupted by an... Incredibly racist word that may or may not begin with N. I was doing something.

Going to breakfast, of course. Making my way to the door I open it and step out into the bland hallways, as always. Only to smell something that isn't as bland as the down right sterile air of this damn castle. It familiar, a bad familiar but it's covered in a new, overlapping smell. This warrents investigation.

So like any no good adventurer, I set off to alleviate myself of my growing case of boredom. Not gonna lie, I am genuinely concerned for my health, is it natural to get as bored as I do not that it matters at the moment considering something is about to end my boredom.

I find my way over to the castle infirmary which cases me to slow my pace and think for a moment. The smell is recognisable, but enough that I immediately know who it is which means we have only meet in passing. The smell... It's a weird one, it's like it's meant to be one thing but it's actually another.

Clearing my head of these thoughts, I walk in to the infirmary and find it empty save for one person. I can't make out much, but the are definatly female with pale skin and yellow hair. Something about that thought bothers me.

"Check up on... Bluebell for us, would ya.

Ohh, bloody hell. I thought that was a joke, apparently not. Well if we can't call him Blueballs anymore we can certainly call him Bluebitch. Egh, doesn't fell the same. Now the real question is what Loki meant by check up. Did he want me to see if he- she is alive or was something else to it. Might as well see if she still capable of actual thought.

Walking up, I flick the man turn woman on the nose, causing their face to scrunch up and for them to stir awake.

The first thing the cursed man got to see when he awoke was me standing over him like Death. Not a bad analogy, if I do say so myself. When he managed to properly wake up his eyes went wide.

"W-who are you?" he sounds like a broken woman. Then again, he did lose his testicles, penis and gender all in one day and Blueblood was a vain man, no doubt the sudden change is messing with his head a lot. I almost feel bad, key word being almost as I have to fake all my emotions and feeling bad for this piece of meat would be a waste of effort. Meat? Why do I have a sudden urge to cover pelvic region. Probably because it sound like a pet name a sexual sadist would give their little sub.

That came out of nowhere. Freaky.

"I'm Chris Licht, Knight of light." I've also decided a knight us better than a noble so that's the titles I'll be using from now. Why did I say that like I was talking to someone? Perhaps i've gone bat shit. "And you, are the former man known as Blueblood, am I correct?" gonna be honest, if this turns out that it isn't Blueblood, i'm going to find a way to kill myself.

"Yeah." wow, I fucked this guy up. Sure Lokis turned the daft sod into a girl, but that wouldn't have happen if I didn't stab the dick... In the dick.

"Well, now that I know you aren't dead, I'll be going. I suggest you get a name change, C'ya." Why did I not consume her, you may ask. Well, my imaginary friend, it's because the jakey formerly known as Blueblood has to live with this arrangement. A far more, amusing punishment than outright murder.

With long strides I make my way to the dining hall, thank the Gods for this nose of mine or i'd be more lost than a nun in a brothel. My analogies are amazing, where did I get that one from. It took me a while to get their super smelling or not as it doesn't tell me which turns to take, so I got a little lost. I would have asked for directions, but y'know, men don't do that.

When I arrived, I was pleased to see that Spike and the elements did stay the night and that they are still here.

"Morning everybody." everyone, but Applejack, Celestia and Pinkie, jumped at my sudden arrival. Many of them laughed it off and returned my greeting with their own.

Taking my usual spot beside Celestia, that for some reason isn't taken by Twilight, and sit down with a small smile.

"You seem pleased with yourself." turning to look who spoke, I see it was Celestia.

"Just had a small conversation with your nephew or is it neice now?" the question wasn't meant to be serious, but I don't think Celly got it... At all.

"What do you mean?" Alright, you've confused me, Celestia. Unless... Ho ho hoooo, has Celestia not seen what has happened to Blueblood yet.

"Oh you know. Just that at somepoint between his de-balling and hospitalisation he was turned into a she. I thought you would have at least visited him once and seen it for yourself, but meh, guess not." This was really unexpected of Celestia, I thought she would have checked on him once and noticed what happened.

"How is that possible? I'm aware that spells exist to change someones Gender, but the never last." I suppose when a someone like Loki cast a spell that's meant to be temporary he can make it permanent.

"I can't say I know. But you have to admit, whoever did it was probably trying to do Blueblood a favour." Celestia nods, but other than that keeps quite. If I were to hazard a guess she's trying to think of people who could do something like that.

Turning to everyone else I look them all over, not really interested in starting another conversation. That is, until Twilight spoke up.

"I notice your appearance has changed since we last saw you." and I bet you want to know how that's possible.

"I'm pretty good at changing my appearance with magic." Yes magic, totally magic. I am eternally greatfull for that bullshit excuse I can use anytime.

"That's pretty complicated magic, especially if it's permanent." I can only imagine, my dear Twilight.

"Soooo, while i'm still here, anyone want to ask me any questions." Why not, thus is likely the only time i'll much about myself. Surprisingly, it was Applejack that spoke first, rather than Twilight... Or Pinkie.

"Ya have a family, partner." way to kill the mood, jackass. Le sigh.

"They're all dead." Yeah, honesty isn't all that great anymore, now, is it Applejack. The answer seemed to effect everyone at the table a little differently. For starters, Applejack gave me an empathetic look which bothered me to no end, Twilight just looked upset, Rainbow seemed to be burying some sort of sadness, Pinkie quite literally deflated, Rarity gave a pitying glance and Fluttershy seemed almost terrified at the prospect of losing family.

"S-sorry for your loss." here comes the pity, I hate pity.

"Ha, they've been feedin' worms longer than you've been alive. I'm over it, Trust me." I think i'm the one killing the mood now, wonderous. "Anyone else want to ask a question."

"When's your birthday?" Pinkie being predictable, how predictable. That felt confusing to think.

"13th October. A little chilly around that time, but I prefer it that way." I honestly find my date if birth to be incredibly annoying and amusing. If only I was born on a Friday then I might laugh.

Content with her answer Pinkie pulls out a folder out of nowhere and jots something down. If I eat Pinkie will I get her power ovee randomness, for the sake of this planet i'm not going to do that, unless she's on deaths door and there isn't anyway to save her.

"You like pranks?" I wonder who raspy voice belongs to. Though that is a good question. I've never really indulged myself in a pranking before.

"I haven't pranked anyone before. I do like watching the aftermath of a prank though, they can be pretty funny." That answer felt bland and boring, I really need to get my fun personality back, i'm not a fan of being so bored all the time.

"Well, Pinkie and I need to take you on a pranking spree sometime." I believe I might enjoy that. I give her a nod of acceptance which makes the prismatic tomboy smirk.

"Would you mind if I made you soem new clothes. Not that there is anything wring with what you currently have, but feel like I must do something to personally thank you for saving Ponyville." Oh yeah, I keep forgetting I saved Ponyville, all I remember is killing things so, I guess, i'm not completely at fault.

"Thanks, i'll be sure to come around at somepoint in the future." I wonder hiw long I can delay this from happening. My clothing is literally a part of my body, so wearing fabric is obsolete. Better than being naked all the time.

I see Fluttershy near the end of the table raise her hand, which got a chuckle out of me, what am I, her teacher. Nodding in her direction, I give permission for her to speak.

"W-hat your favourite animal,
If you don't mind me asking?" Ahh, Fluttershy, speaking as quiet as a mouse and yet I can hear you speak perfectly fine, a true testament to what blacklight can do.

"For a pet, i'd have to say a cat, you don't really need to look after them aside from feeding and cleaning them and as long as they're docile enough they can walk themselves. Although my favourite animal is a tie between the centipede, axolotl and the wolf. They're all interesting in they're own way, it's hard not to like them." That got her smiling, it would appear my... Um, fondness? Yeah, fondness for animals has appeased her.

"Are you going to be coming back to Ponyville or are you going to be stationed elsewhere?" leave it to Twilight to ask the important questions. Well, this one isn't important, but out of all of them it sound the most important.

"You'll be happy to hear that i'm returning to Ponyville, someone has to keep Mistress Everfree calm." I don't even what the fuck that means, but i'm going to role with it.

Kind of like how I'm rolling on the floor right now. It would appear that the news of my return was to much for Pinkie to handle as she lunged over the table and wrapped me in a hug tight enough to be uncomfortable. That's saying something about the girls strength, it doesn't matter how many sweet you eat, a rock farmer still a rock farmer and I bet you need some extra special strength for that occupation. If Pinkie can make me uncomfortable then Maud is likely to have the strength to probably tear me apart.

"Yesssss, this is great. Now you get to take part in all my parties from now on. Isn't thus going to be great." Ah fuck. Part of me wants to tell her that her parties kind if suck, for me. They just aren't parties I like mabye if I was pre-pubescent or drunk and/or high. I'm not going to tell her that though because i'm now certain upsetting Pinkie upsets Maud and she is a dangerous person. She'll never kill me since she can't, but immortal or not, pain sucks ass.

After Pinkie gets off me I finally get up only wonder what time it is. Lets hope one of the boxes has a phone or something, if only for music and the time. When should I leave for Ponyville and if I should go with the girls and Spike or should I make my own way there. I can likely run faster than the train, but I won't get to converse with anyone which is unfortunate, but being an overpowered and/potentially overpowered being kind of makes life a bit lonely.

Might as well wait for the girls to get the train out of here, at least then I'll get to enlighten Spike on the wonders of my world.

Finally, we are on the damn train. Unfortunately, train is called the friendship express which is a little cringy, but it was expected.

Sitting down next to my main man, Spike. We begin a great conversation on comic books although I veered off and started speaking about games after awhile although I have a feeling Spike thought I was still talking about comics since I only spoke about the characters and story. I'll need to show Spike the PS4 that was in one of the boxes, even better is it two controllers.

"That basically sums up every thst happens in Oblivi- HOLY CUNT!" It would seem I can still be caught by suprise if I don't pay enough attention because it took the whole damn train to shake before my conversation was interrupted... What the fuck causes a train to shake aside from rocky terrian. Rough terrain isn't possible though as we are currently in flatland between Canterlot and Ponyville.

"Alright everyone! Hand over all your valuables and nobody gets hurt!" a robbery, of course. This is exactly what I need to bring my old self back.

Looking about the train, I see that two of the, who knows how many, thieves are in the same cart as me, Spike, the elements and a bunch of other people. Everyone, aside from the obvious few being the elements who were getting ready for a fight and myself who didn't have anything to give, were already handing everything they have over to the thugs.

Realising something, I look down at Verse and cycle through it, looking at all the options I have. Thank the Gods for 3D holograms rather than a silhouette of what the are because that would be confusing as shit. I stop looking through the Versatrix when I see one of my favourite game characters, seeing them also make me smile like a psycho.

"Hey Spike." The little dragon blood looks up to me with a scared expression. " What's and learn." with that I press down on the Versatrix and get consumed by an orange light.

"KRIEG!!!" I did not mean to shout that, but it got the results I desired. Both of the theive, and the whole cart for thst matter, looks over to me with confused expressions.

"Ha, I would advise you sit back down before we have to hurt you." I would have laughed if it wasn't so sad, strangely, I laughed anyway. I go to tell them that they might as well give up, but something else come out intead.

"GIVE UP YOUR PANCREAS SO I MAY FEAST, HAHAHAHAHA!!!" I just when full psycho on these ass hats, I almost pity them.

Without some much as a warning my body runs forward, with it's buzzaxe in hand, and swings at the first man and because he was so suprised he meet a bloody end at the hands of KRIEG. That's right, full capitals. The next guy gets over his shock and pulls out a knife and stabs KRIEG in the torso puncturing a lunge, doesn't mean KRIEG give a shit though. I do cause it fuckin' hurt, good to know I feel whatever KRIEG does.

"HAHAHA, MY TURN!" and with the grace of a butcher toying with a piece of meat, KRIEG grabs the guy by the throat with his left hand and with his right jabs his fingers into the mans eyes and scoops them out. "ICE-CREAM ANYONE!" Heh, that was fucked up. How do I change back, not that KRIEG is bad or anything thing, but I have the feeling he'll turn his attention to the passengers with the threat eliminated. With naught, but a thought I manage to turn back to normal.

Walking to the next train Car is see that it is also full of theives. Well, three. Activating the Dail, I spin it around and on random press it down, allowing myself to be consumed by the Fanta orange light. Checking over myself I confirm who I am. By that I mean I listen to my breathing.

"Darth Vader, that's... Agreeable." I'm in so much pain right now. Feels like I tried to fight someone on the high ground and ended up taking a lava bath... Oh wait. Walking, ever so menacingly, into the next car, I look over all the theives, nothing special. These guys are seriously under prepared for whats about to happen.

Not being one to waste time I force pull one of the theives towards me and active my sith red lightsaber as he approaches then when he is in range I bisect him allowing both pieces to fly past me. The other two flops notice me just as their friend died and decided that charging me was a masterful plan. Getting into Vaders natural battle stance I wait for them to aproach me.

The first guy takes a swing at me with a small knife. I quickly retaliate by side stepping and bringing my saber down on his outstretched arm them as he falls to his knees I cleanly decapitate him. The next man is nervous and is slowly backing away however I don't appreciate that and grab the bastard in a force choke.

"Cowardice is... Unacceptable." talking with a constantly active respirator is and intriguing experience. With the man being lifted into the air with the force i'm quick to clamp down on his throat and kill him then for effect I discard the body by throwing it out of the widow, the closed window.

Change back, I walk to the next final car if the train and notice that it also had three people in it. Spinning the Dail again for randomness. I press down and get enveloped by the familiar orange light. Checking my body I see who I've become.

"Cole Macgrath, infamous Karma." As I said i'm all red and stuff with a few arcs of red and black electricity dancing across my body. I've always enjoyed infamous.

Entering the next car I look over the guys in here and it seem the all notice me as well. Shame, sneak attacks are always fun.

"Who the hell are you?" i'm the trains electrician.

"What's it matter, you're gonna die anyway." I'm liking the voice, i'll have to find a way to replicate the sound with my own vocal cords.

These guys, like the rest, aren't that intelligent because the charge me like mindless idiots. The first man goes to punch me, but I step into the punch and grab him by the shoulder and unleash lightening hell throughout his body. This makes him drop to the ground like a bag of potatoes, fried potatoes.

The other guys pull back upon noticing my electrifying aura and wait for me to do something, which is honestly stupid, they should be taking hostages at this point. I point my left hand forward and allow arcs of red lightening to arc arcross it before releasing a barrage of electric bolts to th remaining men. They try to get cover, but there simply isn't anything to do, which means the got nailed by a localised lightening storm, ending their lives.

Switching back to myself in a orange light of orangeness. Turn around as to walk back to the carrige I was originally in only to hear the familiar voice of a nerd ring out throughout the train.

"WHAT DID YOU JUST DO!"

Well cunt, this isn't good.

Author's Note

Remember to point out errors and tell us what you think about the story.
Next chapter a few more boxes will be opened... Probably. Feel free to comment what you want from the boxes whether it be weapon, armour or just stupid.

A nightmare

Geez, Twilight doesn't know how to have any fun. She interrogates me about the Versatrix and I answer all of her questions by being incredibly vague and she starts freaking out like it's the end of the world or something. How she makes any friends is beyond me. But none of that matters as I have finally arrived at my new home and I must say Celestia...

"What the fuck." This isn't a house, it's a fucking mansion, about three stories high. This is completely unnecessary. I hope she doesn't expect me to clean because that isn't happening anytime within this universes life cycle, that's too much work.

Walking toward the building, I open the door and see three people standing there waiting. They almost look like statues with how still they're being. Looking over them, I see that they all have maid uniforms causing me to frown.

'No butlers, damn.' that is a shame. Butlers are cool. Especially the old badass one's like Alfred or Walter because then I won't even need to fight weak opponents as they'll have them defeated for me meaning that only strong and worthwhile combatants get the amazing honour of me putting them in the ground. I suppose I should complain, maids can be pretty scary at times and most people overlook them as weak due to them being girls so I guess I could possibly have a trio of assassins in front of me.

Lets hope their job is to help me rather than try and kill me because if they do attempt to end my life I can say for sure if I could resist the chance to learn about being an assassin through consuming them. Now that I think about it, don't think that's the case, at least for one of them.

"Swift? Ha, I swear, Celestia is trying to keep us together." If that's true I can only assume that this girl has some hidden potential... Or Celestia is playing with her navy (Shipping, in case you didn't know what that meant.) and to be honest I don't see why she's keeping her with me if the first option is true and if it's the second option then Celestia is wasting her time.

The other two are new though and both of them have intriguing scents to them, one of them I recognise a little.

The first maid has shoulder length, dark blue hair and... I believe the correct term is African-American, however, it may be different in Equestria. Her most noticeable features are her golden, slit eyes and her bat wings, as well as the darker uniform. She's giving me a slight glare, although I can't tell if it's because a predator is recognising another predator or it's because i've been staring at her for longer than necessary. It's probably the first if i'm being honest she seems to be the proud type if her posture and smell has anything to go by. How does the smell help you ask, imaginary person i've created for the sake of allowing myself to explain this? It's because out of everyone, she smells the most of perfume, indicating that she likes to take care of herself more than the others. Funny what a simple smell can tell you.

The next new maid has chin length, blonde hair and toffee coloured eyes and pale skin. Out of the other two she appears to be the most beautiful, but if the smell has anything to go by, I now why. Her smell reminds me of that slave den as it and her share an insect smell. If she is here for the reason I think, i'll be getting changeling DNA faster than I had thought, am I lucky or what?

All at once, the three of them speak.

"Welcome to your new home, master." I hate this already. There is just something annoying about being called master, it just leaves me feeling disgusted with everyone involved.

"Well, as your new master, I hereby order you to never call me master again. If you can follow that order we'll get along swimmingly and i'm sure you would prefer that than anything else. Have fun cleaning or whatever it is you do." with all that said and done I walk past three shocked maids, two of them likely because of my attitude and dismissal and the third because I highly doubt Swift expected me to care so little about her being here. I suppose it was a little dickish, but I do plan to give a devil fruit to her since she has been trustworthy enough so far.

Looking around for a while I begin regret not taking one of them with me. At least then I would have had a tour guide, hindsight 20/20. After a small bit of exploring I find out that the first floor is for business and general house things like a library, living rooms and meeting areas. The second floor looks to be all about fun as there is a variety of games that people of all ages can play like foosball, trampolines, arcade machines and even a ball pit. This is some good shit so far, I can even set up the console Loki gave me in there which is great because I didn't think i'd be able to use it so soon. The third and final floor seems to be about sleeping and relaxing as it has multiple bedrooms, a personal bar? A swimming pool and one of those steam room things, whatever you call them.

While I appreciate all that stuff, I could have done without them, especially the swimming pool. I'm certain I can't swim and it isn't because i've eaten a devil fruit. In Prototype you could never stay in the water and usually just sank to the bottom before jumping back out.

Shaking my head, I walk towards the biggest bedroom of the mansion because, c'mon, it's my house and as such I shall have they biggest room. When I arrive I adopt a large smile and allow the 'boxes of good shit' to fall out of my inventory.

Giddy like a child on Christmas, I open one of them only to see a hand mirror, a fancy hand mirror, but little disappointing. Picking it up I notice that it has a nite on it.

Say cheese!

After reading it, a large flash of light erupts from the mirror and blinds me. It took a moment to realise that I wasn't flashbanged, but my eyes jyst so happened to have melted. It explains the pain.

Picking up the mirror to see it my eyes healed properly, the mirror almost falls out of my shocked grasp.

My left eye has gone completely purple with four black ripple-like lines going along it, reminding me of a certain something called the Rinnegan. No biggie right, not like could destroy cities or anything. On a brighter nite this would mean that one of the secret powers Loki let me have is chakra.

My right eye was normal enough aside from the red and black pupil that has a pinwheel pattern to it. It would appear to be a Sharingan, a copy of Sasukes' at that. Pretty cool, if I do say so myself.

I'd say that box was a great success. Looking over at another one, I walk over another box and open it only to pull out an intricately designed revolver with a full chamber. Not knowing what is pick up the sticky note that was in the box and the only this it says is Mysterious Magnun. Well it certainly is a mysterious gun, I don't think i've seen it before. Aww well, a guns a gun, so it doesn't really matter where it comes from. Putting it in my inventory with the rest of my currently unused items. I continue to the next box.

Tearing it open I see that it's a mask, but not just any mask, it's eyepatches or most commonly known as Kaneki's. Deciding, what's the harm, I put it on with fanboy excitement.

When it's on securely I begin to feel a little lighter and yet I can tell I didn't lose any weight. It's like i've become faster and stronger at the same time. Feeling another presence within me I allow it escape with, what I assume is, a mental command then all of a sudden four large red tentacle like things sprout from my back indicating that I have a Rinkaku kagune. This means that my regeneration has also been amped up a fair amount. I take off the mask, throwing it inmy inventory, and command the kagune to disappear.

I'm about to go for the next one, only for rapid knocking to break me out of my thoughts. Walking to the door and opening it, I see that the bat-like maid standing there with a worried look on her face.

"Yeeessss?" I'm unsure of what to assume right know, if the maid I guessedwas the most composed is freaking out then it would mean some real shit happened and it requires me to sort out. Hopefully it's just a crap ton of packages that none of the three are capable of dealing with at the moment, but that's just wishful thinking. Then again, doesn't the Sharingan allow some form of reality warping, mabye i'm allowed to wish a little more than average.

"There are monsters requesting your presnce in the centre of Ponyville." How do they know my name? I guess i'll just ask.

Sighing, I run past her and down my hallway until I reach the window at the end before dolphin diving out of it because who needs doors. Continuing my, above average speed, light jog I find that there are a bunch of black creatures standing around, but not doing anything. There are about ten of them, but only one of them seems to have intelligence.

Nine of them just look like large dogs or lizards, but with a void black colouration and pure, glowing white eyes and mouths, while one of them, stood fully clothed and walking around like a person. It looked like it's clothes were stitched together poorly yet at the same time the looked quite comfortable.

The creature notices me just before I got to it and smiled. This one had sickly green eyes opposed to its white, animalistic counterparts.

"Wonderful, your here. What a strange voice. It sounds like two different voices are speaking at once, props for that strange dude.

"You wouldn't happen to have a name?" Might as well be polite, he may look evil, but that doesn't mean he is.

"Oh, i'm Ruin and i'm here to change the world." Alright, that sounded ominous, but it could still be a good thing even though it clearly won't be.

"That's nice. You wouldn't happen to be even nicer and, I don't know, change a different world?" Let's hope this works even though it won't because everytime I hope something happens the opposite does.

"Nah, this one will do. Anyway, I called you here for a reason." Yeah, no shit. I wouldn't be here otherwise. "You see, you reek of the mad fool Loki and I just want to be cordial and tell you to stay out of our way or else i'll personally see to it everyone you love dies." That's a bit much, but then again, with a name like Ruin you kind of have to be evil in everything you do.

"To bad for you, everyone I love is already dead." I'll admit that isn't really true as the moment I hit puberty i've never loved anything. Can't sat for sure what happened and I can't even make a theory about it. All I know is that I stopped loving.

"Oh... Shit, sorry dude. Ahem, allow me to repeat myself. If you try to stop us I shall kill you and destroy everything you stand for." definitely better than the last threat.

"Alright, Alright. I get it, you're evil, can we just fight alrea-KAAGHH!" It appears I just coughed up a bountiful amount of blood. It also appears my body has entered shock otherwise i'd be in a shit ton of pain right now. "Wou-egh would you... would you kindly remove your fist from my abdominal region, it's causing discomfort." with an irritated scoff, he rather rudely tears his arm back out insuring the maximum amount of pain possible.

"I'll be seeing you."

"Euugh, what the fuck, Where am I?" looking around, I can't help but notice the giant, forty foot tall, chiselled door in front of me that is depicting all types of different demon torturing people.

"Oh, Hello again." quickly turning around, I see Loki sitting by a table, lazily shuffling a deck of card while looking straight at me, it's actually quite impressive. "You like the door, it's actually the gate to hell. I figured while i'm here I should take in the sight one more time and after a few minutes of admiring it, your souls just comes flying by. Luckily for you I prevented it from actually entering." This is too damn confusing.

"So, I died?" That's unfortunate, it's barely been two months since the last time I kicked the bucket.

"You shouldn't worry about it too much. Since your soul didn't technically enter hell I can just shove you back into your body." That's good to hear, I think.

"Alright, what were those things that killed me?" I ask out of curiosity and because my mind screams for revenge.

"Hmm, the black things? they're Nightmares. Nasty pieces of work, they are. They begin as nothing more than feral animals looking for souls to consume until they get enough to develop sapience. A friend of mine, Nekros, is a nightmare. He's bit stubborn and little too murder happy, but so am I, so complaining is worthless. Nightmares are creatures of destruction, they all love violence to a degree and are more than willing to do anything to get what they want." This is certainly an educational death. "The guy that killed you, was called Ruin as i'm sure you're aware. He's one of the traditionalists, you could say, his heart, and I say that as loosely as possible, is dead set on how Nightmares used to work. Go to different worlds, corrupt them and then move in. I prefer Nekros's way of living, which is go to a different worlds, bond to a host and then wreck shit before doing the same in different dimensions all for the sake of having a bit of fun." These are certainly interesting creatures.

"Can you kill them?" I can tell he knows what i'm thinking, it's his damn smirk.

"Only other Nightmares, Gods and a Nightmares symbiotic partner have the ability to kill them. So yes I can kill them, but I try not to. Fighting them takes too long." Well, there goes my plan. "However, I have a theory."

"What would this theory be?"

"A Nightmares souls are interesting, if you remove a soul that Nightmare has consumed, it will immediately go to an afterlife and it weakens the Nightmare due to them needing souls for their strength and intelligence. So... If all the souls they've collected are removed they will be incredibly weak, from what data i've collected from watching Nekros. If all his souls were removed he would be just about stronger than a human at peak physical, mental and emotional condition and Nekros was naturally stronger than most of his species. This would also leave him susceptible to normal attackes meaning even a child could leave a permanent scar or kill him if they were incredibly lucky." Huh, he makes this sound easy.

"I guess there isn't any I can do then." Aww man, this sucks.

"Not necessarily. Ruin entering that world was kinda, mabye, sort of... My fault, hahaha. Sooo uh, Nekros is strong-arming me into getting rid of them and I thought, this would be a good idea to test my theory. So, for the sake of Equstria, i'm going to give you soul magic, the ability to manipulate and control souls to do as you please. Have fun explaining why you aren't dead." aahhh fuck, my new eyes. Too bright.

Owowowowow, my everything hurts. Hold on, is that crying, yeah it is, isn't it. I'm going to get slapped for worrying someone I just know it. Lifting up my hand, I place it on the head of the crying person. Huh, this persons head is sort of squishy, hahaha, it like one of those gelatinous balls you can buy for kids.

I really wish I opened my eyes first.

A sharp gasp resonates from the crier and for a few seconds nothing happens causing the air to become uncomfortably tense. Sighing, I speak up.

"That wasn't your head was it?" They're growling at me, why are they growling? Peaking open my Rinnegan eye, I see a red faced Swift Feather staring down at me. What makes it worse is the tears still streaming down her face. "Oh."

Rather that say anything she just gets up and runs away making me grimace. "Why didn't she just hit me, it's so much easier to deal with angry women than sad women." I say in a quiet voice.

Sitting up. I look around and notice that the Nightmare didn't trash the place and leave everything in... Ruin. Oh yeah, I deserve to go to Hell. Thanks God, for confirming it when I died the second time. Standing up, I look around and see that a lot of people from Ponyville are standing around me and looking in varying degrees of shock.

"You should probably go see if mum is okay." looking down at the voice, I see that's it's Screw Ball. Looking at her, I can't help, but blink in confusion.

"Mum, Really?" I ask, I honestly didn't think she had parents. As dark as that may sound.

"Well, you're like my Dad so that must be my Mum." Now that was a shocker, but I still can help but smile at the childish naivety.

"I don't think we know eachother well enough for that kind of relationship, but Hell, I just came back to life so i'm not even going to argue. So go ahead, call me what you want." I wonder how she managed toget to the conclusion of me being her Dad... Now isn't the time to think about this, asshole, we have a friend and apparent 'Wife' to try and comfort. Wait what, when did I start caring about people?

"Fucking Equestria."

Author's Note

Took a break for a month, wrote this in one night. Something is wrong with me, oh yeah, I got bored of wrighting for a bit. Quick warning, that happens.
Now then, it would seem our not-hero is getting even stronger than before. He also seems to be becoming more compassionate, whatever will he do?
Remember, more boxes mean more OP fun. Don't be shy, just wright in the comments something you'd like to see Chris have.
Like always, point out my mistakes because I live for criticism, like a verbal masochist.

On another note, someone wanted me to continue 'Not part of the equation' If you want to see me write more stories, read it and tell me if you want to see more.

What I do Is For The Greater Chaos

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Power to the people!

Author's Note

Ok, someone get this guy a computer. Also, enjoy, since he's been helping me for the last 3 hours with this, yay I guess.

Sincerely, Slendy

Lucaridis here, I have a slave! it's fun.

I hate you, asswipe.

Power to the people!

"Merry Christmas." I say as I hand Swift a box of ultimate fun time. I don't think see knows what Christmas is and considering the look on her face I may be more right than wrong. Either way, her knowledge on Christmas is irrelevant and she accepted my gift nonetheless.

"Thank you." No proplemo, Swifty. Thank me by opening the damn thing, I wanna know what's inside. Cautiously she opens the box and peers inside only to seem somewhat confused and underwhelmed but she does pull out a note before anything else.

"What does it say?" I ask for obvious reasons, if Loki put a serious note in their it'll be worth checking.

"It says that anyone incapable of shapeshifting will face irreparable genetic damage." Holy fuck, that sounds dangerous. Walking towards Swift I look inside the delicious box of goodness and see something... awesome, yet underwhelming.

"Huh, it's full of scouters." Taking a moment to think about it I suddenly realise the implications and then allow myself a teethy smile. "Swift, I know as of this moment that box belongs to you, but may I have a scouter." She looks really confused but I can't really blame her.

"Um, sure. what do they do, anyway?" gently taking a scouter I look at Swift with a grin.

"They tell you how strong someone is. In this case, however, I think something rather super might happen." By that I mean a there is a possibility of becoming one of the strongest races in the universe. Or just read power...yay, I guess. So, as Loki would want, I placed it over my left eye, and for a second. Nothing, well that was-HOLY SHIT, ITS OVER-wait...oh, ok, infinity.

"Well Swifty, turns out I'm an overpowered mess of a thing." At my response, she placed hers on her eye, and for a moment, nothing...surprise, surprise. Then next thing I know, my ass is flying through every wall of my home, Shit-Fuck-Ow-Balls. And finally, touch down.

"How the fuck are you stronger than me, I'm me!" I yelled from the other-side of the house. So in almost light-speed, Swift was in front of me, a worried look on her face, which was now covered with a golden aura, as her eyes turned to a brighter teal, even her hair was gold now. Bluebell would be proud. "Just because you're a super sayian, don't make you better than me."

"I'm a what?" You're a wizard, harry.

"Surprise, you have the power to turn into a very formidable force, and you can grow stronger with each fight, and any near-death experiences." I bluntly explained, as Swift looked over her body in wonder, as I brushed the stone, a possible blood off my stylish clothing. "Also, how duh fuck did I get knocked on my ass, but you stood up without a care?"

At my question, we watched as a small receipt flew out the side of my scouter, so I grabbed it, and held it up so I could read it out loud.

Dear, Rook

As you've probably discovered, you've been knocked on your ass, and are currently wondering what is going down in my town. Well, you both now have the power to grow and evolve into the evolutionary forms of the super sayians. Chris, you've got enough power to go super sayian blue, meaning only Gods can sense your God-Ki, or something. For Swift, yes, I know where you live.

Well she can progress through the levels as always, just try not messing with any death-related stunts, progression is a bitch, but not worth taxes.

Sincerely, Your most awesome God, Loki

"Wait. Who's Loki?" Good question. I still have to figure that out. Then she looked directly at me, as she own hair went back to normal, strange, she's still awake. "And better yet, what am I now!?"

"Ok-Ok, cool your Vegeta, you're....something, but still you, just a better you, strength-wise, not like appearance needed to change, that you have in spades." I explained, before her face lit up like my face a few minutes ago. Then something interesting caught my attention. "Hold the metaphorical phone....I've got God-Ki, right?"

"Y-Yeah?" Still recovering, got it.

"Then have a guess who can probably sense my power level."

Canterlot

Celestia was carefully looking through her notes, eyeing the boring concerns of the Nobles like usual, until she felt a wave of pure chaotic magic, on terms with a God wash over her like a tsunami. This caused her to shoot from her chair, her eyes widening from the sheer amount that pasted her.

"WHAT IN EQUESTRIA WAS THAT!!?" She yelled in fury, as she heard someone enter the room, before her own sister yelled out to her

"Did you sense that!?" She screamed. As Celestia gulped in terror

"I tasted that...."

Discord's Statue

As the wave past over Discord's prison, his own eyes grew within the frame of the stone, before his head snapped to turn towards the origin of the magic, as the stone snapped out of its hold, leaving his body to face the opposite direction, as he peered towards the town.

"What the fu-"

Frozen North

As the winds howled through the everlasting winter, a lone soul wandered endlessly through its grasp. Before its shadow turned towards the spike in magical power. As he snorted in disgust.

"Why do the good ones always get the good shit!?" Sombra spat in distaste, before he decided to make his way in the direction of the Empire, before he paused, and looked in the direction of the energy spike. "Hmm..."

Badlands

"Another-one bites the dust!" Ruin sung, as he let the two changeling bodies turn to ash, as their green souls joined his mass in wonder. But before he could progress any further, he froze mid-stride, before turning around with a twitching eye. "Is that me!? Is that me, stronger than me!? I'll fucking kill me!"

Then he paused....before his rage, turned to a laugh of pure joy.

"Oh, now that is cute. Adorable even!" He mused, as he felt his connection grow ever-so-stronger

Tartarus

Among the darkened parts of the world, a creature stood within his cage, as the monsterus being stood watch over his frail body. But nothing could prepare the two for the overwhelming force of nature that washed over the two beings. The Cerberus growled in defence. But the creature within the cage grinned sickly, as his eyes watched over the crimson horizon.

"Interesting...."

"Chris?" Ah, so she finally speaks. I was beginning to think patching holes killed her mind, I know it worked on me, then I replaced those cells, with regenerated cells. Anywho, back to the now nervous girl before me, strange, she seems to be rather frightened. Did my face melt off?

"What." I muttered, not really focusing as I finally patched the last irritating hole up within my home, and yet I didn't ask the maids. Fuck me.

"You knew I was in that...place, back in Canterlot." Ah, so that's what that was...well, this got fucking awkward fast

"Well, you know, Blacklight. enheightened senses, so picking up on your presence wasn't a chore, but the guards were." I rambled, as she looked away from me, but then she answered

"I didn't want to be there, Blueblood....he promised me a promotion, then I would have been able to live a better life, but...he only kept me around because I was a girl, nothing more. Then, you showed up, and well, the rest is history." She explained as I kind-of phased out a little, but I got the memo.

"Yeah, he's a she now, so you're all good." I replied, as Swift blinked at that, before actually laughing, good, less awkward.

"Still, I just wanted you to know that." Why? "Because you actually made my life alot better." Oh. "So thank you, for everything."

Wait. Did my heart just skip a beat? Wait, I have a heart? Questions for later. So, instead of an awkward hug or some shit, I just patted her on the head, although, she didn't mind, I guess. I've been guessing alot lately. Ooh, idea! Will it work? Meh. So, I quickly grabbed Swift's hand, and pulled her through my repaired wall, as I felt a tear roll down my face. All that work... Why would I do that!? I have maids for Loki's sake!

"Chris, where are we going?" Swift asked, as she flew beside me now, as I ran down the streets towards the massive tree-library-thing. The Treebrary. Then I saw her look at me with a deadpan look. "Also, you know I can fly, right?"

"Details Swifty. Right now, how do you feel about making this a threesome?" And like that, she nearly met the dirt in a way that seemed fun. Then she recovered, her face turned red. "No! Not like that, unless you're in to that, but right now, how do you feel about having a dragon?"

But before she was allowed to even comprehend my question, I saw the house in sight, so I held my arm in front of me, as I picked up the pace, forcing all my mass into my arm. Ok...

3...

2...

1...

And within the time-frame, I collided through the door, sending splinters and dust through the walls like arrows. And as I rolled, Spike looked at me with confused-horror, as he dropped his comic in surprise. Then, without any consent, I grabbed his tail, and pulled him out the door, Swift narrowly avoiding my charge.

"Spike. Follow. Now. Threesome. Fun!" I worded angrily, as I pulled the wood fragment from my throat, throwing it away. And so, the fun began!

"Ok Spike. That's the rundown. Wanna be number one?" I asked curiously, as Swift sat on my bed, as Spike tried to collect his thoughts, and mouth off the floor. It was progress. But I didn't really care, so I pulled out from under Swift, three boxes. Mind you, I have absolutely no idea what's in these, and I couldn't care less, my face was melted last time...oh shit, which one was that?

"Ok, you got three choices, and mind you, one of these may kill you, so worry about that bridge later." I waved off, as he finally spoke

"Wait-Wait-Wait! So, not only are you from another world, you have powers that make you more powerful than Celestia. And you want me to join you because of the promise you made me ages ago?" Spike nut-shelled, and I just shrugged

"Well, I'm not training a dragon, I'm training a Dragon that can shout like a Dragon, and have the power to kill a drag-" And like that, he lost me

"Heck yeah! Count me in!" He cheered. Not noticing my blinking face. "I hope Twilight won't be too annoyed about this..."

"Wait what!?" Me and Swift replied in absurdity, as we looked from each other, than to Spike. Ok, kid's got balls

"You do realize, that one of these boxes may very well melt your face off." I reminded, but he shrugged

"Well....that does sound bad, but it also sounds cool!" Ok, I like this kid, but seriously, what part of 'melting face off' sounded remotely interesting, to the point of reaching the level of 'cool'. A super computer could take decades and not comprehend the amount of fucks this child did not give.

"Fuck it. Take your pick." At that, I shoved them over to him. But Swift looked worried.

"Are you serious?" No, that takes time to replicate. Mere seconds woman. "Chris, I don't think-"

"What is this?" At Spikes words, we looked to see a small red gemstone, as it seemed to give off a strange aura. But what happened next made a small grin appear on my face, then, the gemstone vanished into the drake's arm. "Ahh! Where'd it go!?"

"So, that's what you got." I muttered, before Spike looked at his hands as if they were broken. "Dragon Slayer Magic."

"Dragon Slayer...?" Spike and Swift echoed, as I cracked my neck, until my spinal cord snapped. Shit's about to get crazy.

"Right then. Who wants to cause World War 5?"

To Be Continued...

Swift's Abilities:
-Sayian Blood (Able to obtain and control super sayain forms)
-Zenkia Burst (Stronger with every near-death experience)
-Avious (Can fly and control the weather)

Spike's Abilities:
-Fire Dragon Slayer Magic (Natsu basically)
-Second Generation Dragon Slayer (Slightly stronger than 1st)
-Dragon's Blood (Attributes of dragons, tougher skin, immune to fire etc.)

I Will Kill As Many People As I Have To As Long As You Are One Of Them

So, woke up today, or mimicked the cognitive function of 'sleep'. Thinking my rather less-than unfortunate life couldn't get more stupid, I was wrong, as I saw that my three woman-dragon-virus team was cut to just woman-virus. Quite the piss-take. So, to sum up my day. Gargle, red dragon-guy, took Spike cause I may have taught him how to 'speak' like a dragon, or 'Dragon Shout' from Skyrim, and that may have ended with him being kidnapped. Fuck me.

"You know this is a bad idea!" Oh, yeah, Swifty was here. I turned my neck to look at her, my eyes never once sticking to the water beneath me, cause, you know, I can't swim, but Loki, is it good to be a Sayian

"You joined on your own accord. Not my problem." Seriously, why do these people try to involve themselves in my sto-Oh shit, I really am a fucking OC in a story. Shit.... Hmm, I get cool as fuck powers out of it though, worth it.

"You would just kill everyone until someone knew where he was, right?" . . . No comment.

Other than my easy way of dealing with things, I saw some'thing' approaching us, was it a person? I don't know, I can't see from a fuck-yard away. But if I had to guess, it was either a dragon, or one of those hybrids, oh joy. But judging by Swift's reaction, it was the latter.

"Dragon?" She muttered, and so I did the only rational thing I could comprehend. I shot it. So I stopped mid-air, before clasping my hands together, as Swift gulped nervously. "Uhh, Chris? What are you doing?"

I then felt my hair stand-upright, as I activated SSJ2. Then I called out with much fabricated glee.

*GALICK GUN*

From my palms, a huge wave of purple shot forth, clouding the sky in a purple hue, as my 1000% boosted attack fired across the sky like a railgun. Then, it hit its mark, causing several beams of purple to rebound across the sky, smashing into the dirt beneath the body, as it fell down with it. Huh, that was rather one-sided.

"Are you insane!?" Swift exclaimed, as I turned to look at her

"Maybe, but I honestly can't be bothered figuring it out." I replied, before I could just about see the remains of the body. "Well, look at it this way, he's breathing....or gasping for lack of lungs, heart, guts, stomach....alot of stuff."

"Fine...let's just go see if he's alright." Swift sighed, as she descended with an odd mix of emotions. What? I just helped us...ungrateful bitch. That was uncalled-for, strange.

When we did land, I saw that I managed to clip the wings, along with an arm, ok, so accuracy is down, gotta improve the cells in my eyes. So, being the gentleman I am, I picked him up by his coat, lifting his bleeding form to look at me, his eyes now showing pure terror.

"Ok, if you tell me, and my maid, what you know, I won't un-alive you." I bluntly stated, as he coughed up some blood, and directly onto my face. Cool, free DNA.

New Abilities:
-Adult Dragon's Blood (Everything Spike has but stronger)
-Gem Breakdown (Can consume, and gain magical power from gemstones)
-Tougher Skin (Skin as hard as dragon scales)
-Thu'um (Dragon speech/Roar)

Aw sweet, I can actually use the Thu'um now, I had hoped that would be the case, I may also have aids now, shit. So, with my shout in tow, I grinned at the commoner as I stared into his draconic eyes.

"Right-o, how's about you tell me where I can find a purple Kirin, and I'll maybe-" I just got a glare from Swift! "-Will spare your life, probably."

"Rok Ko Faal Volcano Voth Fin Sunvaar!" Oh, that's oddly specific. Probably a trap

"Ok Swifty, he's in a volcano with a beast. Either its another dragon, or is Ruin. I hope its the latter." I finally spoke, as she just blinked at my complete understanding of dragon tongue

"Umm, ok?" She nodded, ok, now what shall I do with-Oh he's dead, aw well. So I unceremoniously dropped him, as his body was quickly absorbed by my biomass. "That...was really disgusting."

"Meh, take what you will but I...oh Loki, I really do have aids now!" I gasped in surprise, before my frown returned. "Welp, no use crying over rotten corpses, lets make haste!"

"Hey buddy! You ok!" I yelled down at the massive pool of molten rock, as I saw the purple dot from afar. From what I gathered in about 5 seconds is that he's been tied up, left in the middle of volcano that looks strangely like an arena, and is gagged. And yet he didn't use his fire dragon slayer magic. Piccolo would be disappointed

"I don't like this. I'm a maid, not a fighter, so why am I here!?" I've been asking that question myself, but here we are, stalker

"You followed me. And besides, you have Sayian blood now, so just fire off a Ki blast if something moves." I complained, as she looked at me with worry. Ooooh my Loooooki!

"But i'm not a fighter!" Yeah, I can tell

"Then stay here, but if you're thrown into a shit pit, crawl your way out yourself!" I snapped, gods she's annoying sometimes

"As is everyone we know." Oh fuck nuts! "More like "Oh holy Loki" but whatever."

"Ok, so why are you here?"

"Well one, I wanted to see how fucked up this ordeal is, and two, Serafin's threatening me." Who? "Hush boy! She's right beside me!"

"I can hear you. And who is this?" Oh great, another one. "Let me guess, Loki's got you hooked into his mess, right?" Yeah....? "Figures."

Right, So whist I untie my companion, mind telling me why you two decided to drop by? Or is that just not happening? In reality though, Spike was currently yelling something to me, but all I heard was stuff, danger, more stuff, gargle, stuff with stuff, and we need to leave. Riveting.

"Well, if you care to listen to your friend, he's trying to tell you something." Oh, ok then, focus

"Sorry, you were saying something that had to do with the plot of my disturbingly story-like life?" I asked calmly, then he just pointed behind me. So like a dramatic camera, I turned. "Oh for fuck sake-"

"Nice to see you again!" Ruin replied from the ridge, as he kicked Swift down to the magma below, thankfully, she remembered the fucking wings poking out her shoulder blades. "I must admit, you have quite the knack for fucking with everything I try to do."

"Would you just say that its a trap, before I fuck your cat!" I replied, causing him to pause for a moment, then he narrowed his gaze

"I don't have a cat." Ruin, im'ma ruin your cat

"So i'll buy you one, just so I can fuck it!" That made him take a step back, before he cleared his throat

"O-Ok then, umm, well....do you know what happens when a Nightmare corrupts a weaker specimen?" Shit. Loki, explain!

"You may want to look behind you. Also, Serafin, give him the 'thing'." What thing?

"What 'thing'?" Serafin echoed with annoyance, before she replied with a sigh. "I swear Loki, if this gets out of hand-"

"Oh my cotton socks! Just give him the power-up!" And like that, they decided to piss off. "...bye."

When I did actually turn around, I watched as a massive wyrm (Chinese Dragon) of molten red rock, and flesh with some sort of leathery, black skin, as it emerged from the volcano, somehow not causing an eruption. Its entire body was dripping with magma and rotten flesh, its ribs just barely containing its organs as some sloshed about in its mass. Its face was torn in two, with blood dripping from its missing eye, as it breathed a mixture of flames, and blood. I'm so glad I don't have a sense of smell.

"So, I'd say its been nice knowing you, but it hasn't. So do me a favor, and die screaming." Ruin grinned, as I felt a new rush of energy flow through me, along with some pretty interesting attacks. Shit, now I like this Serafin chick, she's got some good stuff

New Abilities:
-Crimson Paladin (Now a royal guard of the Nether realm)
-Sacred Flame (Completely immune to fire)
-Pyromania (Can control fire and create weapons made of fire)

"Ha! Now i'm immure to-AHHHHHHH!!!" Holy fucking shit this hurts! Ah balls, crap, dick, bitch! Right, magma is not fire.

"IIZ SLEN NUS!!!" Wait, was that the-oh, everything is cold now. When I clawed my way out of the rock, I looked in honest surprise at Spike, who was breathing like he ran through a triathlon.

"Oh Celestia, Chris!" Swift cried out.

"Are you ok!?" Spike added.

"Are you fucking serious, that freakin hurt!" I replied, as I looked up at the growling wyrm, its rotten teeth bearing.

So like the great Piccolo once taught. I dodged, avoiding a mix of magma, fire, and blood. Then it flew around to fly in front of Ruin. His smug look matched by the creature's fucked up face. Then I looked to see the most pitiful sight to behold, the two beings at my sides.

"Ok, so who here has the balls to actually fight?" I asked, as Spike nodded, obviously, but everything about his posture screamed 'I'M GOING TO FUCKING DIE!'. But Swift....well I doubt she'll-and she's now a super sayian....did not see that coming. "So...who want's to kill it."

"Don't you do it!" Ruin yelled.

"I'm'ma do it!" I called back, so I pulled Cassul and Jackel, but at that moment, both Swift, and Spike ran, as I was drenched in molten magma again, before I rushed out of the was, but it burned like a mother fucker. "Stop doing that-" I was hit again with magma.

"Spike, can you use your abilities, i'll try to distract it from Chris!" Thank you! I swear, this day has been one big-AHHHHH-Fuck me, again! Really!

"Look what washed up! A bitch!" Say what now.

"Fire Dragon Roar!" Spike yelled, as the beast was hit with a torrent of flames, causing the beast to scream at its own discomfort, so I took my opportunity to-FUCKING BITCH! "Chris, are you-"

"I'm going to do handstands on your corpse when i'm done!" I retorted, before I managed to get airborne again. I then brought my arms back, as I condensed the light into my hands, and before me, a bow of void appeared. "Now I can finally-Fuck my ancestors!"

"Another one bites the dust!" Ruin taunted. And as I shook the remaining lumps of flaming flesh off me, I could feel it, my biomass was melting, fast. Shit, i'm going to be 2 feet shorter at this rate! Then I'll have to spike my hair up, and constantly nag about the Sayian race.

But as I watched, Swift was simply dodging the wyrm with ease, as Spike tried to damage a creature made of lava, with fire. Ok, that's just-AHHHHH.

"Chris!!!" Yes-Yes I know! Then finally, nothing attacked me, maybe I can catch a break now-

"So, how's that 'winning' strategy working for you?" Ruin asked from behind the Wyrm, as I panted at the lack of energy I had, almost all of it was used just to keep my being moving again. Ok....that's it. Fuck this, fuck that, fuck Ruin, and fuck his cat! So I slowly rose into the air, as Spike, and Swift moved aside, both tired at this point.

"What's he doing?" Spike asked

"I don't think its good..." Swift gulped, then chuckled nervously. "I mean, the worst he could do at this point is use that 'Gun thing' from before."

"He could try and blow up the planet." Spike suggested, but Swift rolled her eyes, oh? Is that a lack of faith in me? Lets fixed that.

"AHHHHHHH!!!" I managed to turn Super Sayian Blue, as a golden aura surrounded my being. The winds around us quickly picked up, as the lava below flew from the pit it resided in

"He's going to blow up the planet!" Swift freaked out

"But I live here!" Spike whimpered, as Ruin just tilted his head

"He-He can't be serious?" Ruin blinked at my rage-mode. Then I placed my hands in front of me, as the golden energy built up within its center. Then, arcs of lightning shot forth, some narrowly missing the gnat. "Oooh I can actually feel that!"

"Oh yeah! THEN HOW ABOUT THIS!!!" I screamed, with the sound of a thousand rage fuelled voices all at once.

"Well...first you have to 'hit' me." He was...taunting me.... hehehe.

"Chris, this isn't worth destroying Equestria!" Swift begged, nope, not happening

"I don't think he's listening anymore!" Spike retorted

FINAL FLASH

"Wait, Final what?"

At my final scream, I released a ray of pure gold, blinding me completely as it engulfed the entire area around us. It was only a few seconds later did I finally release my hands, as my SSJ Blue subsided, along with basically 20% of my biomass. And when I did, I blinked at the nothing ahead of me.

I managed to not only destroy half the volcano, but the mountains ahead had a hole piercing them all, and if my directions were correct, that means Griffonstone is gone, total, poof, everyone is dead. But the biggest change, was the massive hole that now pierced the moon, a permanent donut shape was left in the sky, as I panted from the lack of strength I had. Even with abilities reducing that to nothing, no biomass, meant I was dead for real, so i'll need to take that into account next time.

Even Ruin, and that creature were nowhere in sight, but if Loki was right about Nightmares, he might have survived.

"C-Chris!" Oh yes, people problems. So when I finally descended, Spike's mouth wouldn't close, and Swift seemed to be crossed with a mixture of anger, relief, and shock. Hey, I was surprised she did more than be a side-character this time. Gold Star. Then, I replied simply.

"I fucked his cat."

To Be Continued...

(Here a representation of what just happened)

Author's Note

I have an idea! I'm curious to see how people view Chris so if your feeling artistic draw to your hearts content and send it my way, or don't, it's not like you'll get anything out of it.

Loki's Rant of Impossibly Unexpected Revelations

"WHAT! THE! FUCK!" So this is fear, I did not think I could still feel this emotion. That is simultaneously interesting and terrifying.

"... Sorry." Why is everything spinning. Ah, a haymaker with the strength of an Ultmagi.

"YOU SINGLE-HANDILY WIPED OUT A RACE, AND MANAGED TO TURN THE MOON INTO A DONUT!!!" Well, that certainly sounded ridiculous when said out-loud

"Well in my defence, Ruin caused me to do it." It was true, he did start it. But now I was fearing for my life when I was telekineticly thrown into the floor, shattering the tiles, then I spat the marble from my mouth. "I get the feeling you're upset?"

"Upset wouldn't begin to comprehend the reckless actions you pulled yesterday! I hereby ba-" I was about to retort on that rather bland writing, but someone beat me to the punch

"Well, that's just lazy writing." Oh shit

"Oh shit..." Wait. Did Swift just swear? Wow...i'm actually feeling a sense of pride right now. But in all honesty, I was more concerned for why Loki was standing before us, and why he was standing on my head, I was starting to swallow that marble now

"Who are you?" Finally, she speaks. At Celestia's question, Loki stepped off my head, as I pulled my face out from the floor, then he tapped his cane against the floor

"Well...I guess I'm still a ghost, shit." He muttered, no idea what that meant. "It means no one knows me, asshole!" Oh...

"Wait, since when could you read my mind?" I asked the obvious like I just slapped with a fish

"Boy, everything, everyone, every time." Loki replied, before turning on his heel, and looking directly at Swift, and Spike who were watching in silence, and possible fear. "'Fear'? Bitch, i'm adorable."

"So, you're Swirft Feath, and Barney, correct?" Loki pointed with a squint, as they both looked at each other, before opening their mouths to speak. "Swirft, correct me, and I'll tear your world a fucking sunder!"

Her mouth closed. So Loki turned again, levitating me to my feet, before smacking me across the face with his cane, which sent my skull, and half the wall to my left into dust. Hold on, I don't have a skull...did he just knock the non-existent skull out of me!? When my face regenerated, Loki groaned.

"Great...I'm weaker in this world, fucking brilliant...." What. The. Fuck. "Ok, right now, serious time people! So shut the fuck up and listen!"

"But no one else is talking but you..." Spike spoke up, as Loki paused, his purple coat blowing in the wind from the new hole in the castle

"Right! So let me explain that Chris did you all a favor." I did? I erased a kingdom, and made a donut of the moon. "Like I said, he did you all a favor."

"And what might that be? That, and who are you?" Celestia asked curiously, as we heard the sound of tires screeching to a halt, as Loki tilted his head to look at her

"Did I say you can fucking speak?" He asked dangerously, but rolled his eyes into the back of his head, then back again, what that an 'eye roll'? "Well first, i'm Loki, God of Stars, learn it, worship it, fucking purge because of it."

"And as I was saying, Chris here actually stopped what would have been another one of Ruin's attempts at building an army, one which I rather have far away from the problem at hand, so in hindsight, probably should have told him, but I like surprises." He rambled, as I blinked at that revelation

"So we stopped an invasion plan?" Swift finally caught on, as he clapped with no movement of his hands

"Essentially, I must say, did not expect you, and Barney to actually fight, given your passive nature." Loki shrugged, then clicked his fingers. "Merry Christmas bitches..."

Swift was now carrying a longsword with a silver blade, with a bulky hilt, with a purple shard attached between the blade, and hilt. The sword forged from Willbreaker, (Void-Edge). For Spike, he now carried a large handcannon, black and white, with a spade symbol on either side. (Ace of Spades).

"And like that, you both get upgrades." Loki slurred in boredom. "Swirft, you can now wield the power of void, alongside 'taking' enemies as your own personal army, all you need to do it make their will bend to yours. Barney, you carry the most powerful handcannon ever made in Destiny, one shot of its endless chamber with cause even dragon scales to be turned to dust, and that doesn't even count the explosive tips."

"Cool!" Spike was already looking at his new weapon with glee, and Swift....well I couldn't really tell, it was a cross between something like fascination, and utter terror

"Right...as I was saying, Ruin is...an odd creature." Oh here we go again. "Shut it boy! Ruin is a Nightmare, as in the physical manifestation of negative emotions, and they do 3 things. Control, conquer, consume. That is what Ruin is here for, and due to his high level of intelligence, and the amount of souls that Chris left behind from Final Flash is only going to make things worse." Oh fuck my ancestors

"What do you mean by that?" Luna inquired, as Loki pointed to me

"He left behind the equivalent of an entire race, and since Nightmares grow stronger with the consumption of souls...." Loki then trailed off, as Spike spoke up again

"Then he's going to be even stronger!?" Gold star to him

"Yep, and if you two 'monarchs' think those 'Elements of Harmony' can harm him, then you must really want me to leave Chris to fuck this world." He laughed at this, before tapping his cane on the ground again, and before we knew it, the whole wall to our left was repaired, and even the face-mark left by me was gone

"Honestly, I don't have the foggiest idea where he is now, and to be honest, as long as he's dead, and the world isn't completely gone by then, I couldn't care less." Loki then tipped his hat, before looking directly at me, I swear, his eyes were scary. "Make a bet if you're concerned, it could be good revenue for later."

*POP*

He just...popped from reality, what the fuck? But then I felt something scroll through my mind, like a typewriter, that, and I could hear a typewriter in my head. 'Challenge THeum-Fuck! Challenge them to addd-Balls! Challliggh-Oh Fuck it! Challenge them to o a duelly-Fuck me!' I think I get the idea.

"Ok, Princesses, Loki wanted me to challenge you both to a duel." Insert large gasp. "I guess its a way to forgive what I did or something along those lines?"

They both looked at each other for a moment, then they both looked at me evenly.

"We agree to your challenge, and when we win, you are to tell us everything about you, from your abilities, to your affiliation with this 'Loki' character." Luna stated, then she glared at me, but I wasn't really phased this time, but the pressure around her body was building, almost like gravity itself was bending. "Noble or not, I will not hesitate to kill you."

"And I you, Luna." I nodded, then I pointed directly at the two of them, as I let some of my biomass seep from my body, almost like I was melting, tendrils seeping from my arms, and face like a Nidus. "If I win, you give me the freedom to use whatever methods of destruction I choose to destroy Ruin."

"That...yes, we will allow it." Celestia agreed, and the flaming aura was burning from her like a comet. "We will grant you one month of preparation, then we shall meet in the Canternlot Coliseum."

"Goodie, but I just want to add one more rule..." This made me grin a little. "Let this event be open to anyone, if they sign their names down, they fight me before all of you, either one or ten times that, then after, I'll face you both at once."

"Deal." Luna instantly agreed to, then I grinned smugly

"Look at it this way, i'll be weaker, so you might just have a chance." That pissed Luna off, and a pang of irritation struck Celestia, good. So I moved towards Spike, and Swift, grabbing the two of them and making my way to the exit. "Seeya when I seeya."

"Are you sure about this?" Spike, If I wasn't sure, I wouldn't be listening

"Meh, you're saying you don't wish to see the fight of the multiverse play out in front of you?"

"...." Not a single word from Swift, hmm, this is rather perplexing, I might need to look into this...

To Be Continued....

Author's Note

This shit's gunna be great! Or atleast later, for now though, I guess i'll leave you to dwell on all these revelations.

Next one will be from the perspective of Swift and Spike for a change. So, that's a thing.

Interlude 1: Swift's Reality

"You see only innocence, and love. What you fail to see, is the shadows that await underneath it all." - Nekros

Why all of this? What does beating Celestia, and Luna have to do with anything? Its pointless, I think...ahh! I hate this! Every time something normal seems to be going right, its always thrown out of the window because of this...God. I can't really blame Chris, since he's been tied into this mess, but...he agreed.

"I give up..." I muttered, staring down at my reflection, my eyes were teal again, my hair stood up in a wild mess as I narrowed my eyes, swiping the image away, turning the water to ripples as my hair finally sat back down normally again. "Stupid Sayian Blood...."

"You have a serious mental problem, like, I might need to add a 'Self Harm/Suicide' tag to this story, but fuck it, its beneath me." At the voice, I nearly fell into the lake, before I stared up at that guy from- "You say my name, or else."

"Loki. Why are you here?" I really wasn't in the mood, haven't been for nearly two days, heck, I haven't even slept for two days. But like when I first met him, he went on a tangent

"I'm here, i'm there, basically everywhere when you think about it." He mused, before tapping his cane on the dirt twice, before a chair appeared from nowhere. "But enough about my problems, which is alot, how's my newest pawn doing?"

Are you kidding me? "Do you ever stop annoying people?" That made him grin. "Don't answer that. But seriously, why all of this? Just for one guy. when you clearly have the power to do so, so why?"

"Cause the Multiverse is a bitch, and i'm its pawn." He stated matter-of-factly, before he continued. "Gods created mortals, Gods were created by The Prime God, and Prime was created by Creation. A simple, yet overwhelming conclusion, no matter how you look at it."

"You mean something created us all? Not a God?" That made him click his tongue, before he pointed towards the night sky in amusement. So I looked up, staring at the clear, night sky above us, then he clicked his fingers

In a mere second of white, I gazed up at the massive collection of stars, but among massive constellations of universes, which were collected in a mass of other universes bigger than it. Reds, oranges, yellow, everything was igniting the whole aurora of colour, and impossibility. It was honestly the most beautiful thing ive ever witnessed.

"Like I said, Multiverse is a bitch, and I can control a fragment of it, but that's limited to very strained rules." He muttered, then he pointed to one universe, as he sighed in actual despair. "Fucking idiots made me soft, but besides my bad luck of immortality, you finally snapped out of your depression, or are we still doing this?"

"Well...I think I get what you're trying to say?" I did?

"You do?" Even he was skeptical, but his eyes never left the crimson universe

"I was given a life better than the one I have, even if you don't express it, you wanted this to happen out of curiosity, and kindness, even if that's harder to explain." I responded. "You want to do better, I don't know why that involves someone as insignificant as me, but thank you."

"Rather you than Ruin, am I right?" What? "But I've grown bored of this chat, so I'm off to go mess with Serafin....have fun dealing with....your mortal problems or something...." He then made everything in reality turn back to normal in an instant, before turning to leave

"Whiny. That's what you are." He added, as I stared at him with surprise, and irritation that began to grow. "But....insignificant is not one of them, trust me, I learned that a long time ago, and I still regret it, so seeya."

*POP*

"And...he's gone." I blinked, I guess I don't have a choice in this matter anymore, whether or not I agree with my new way of life, I can't just throw it away, not when I can actually 'do' something to help others now. A maid isn't really meant for much, I don't know how I expected my life to go well in that state, but now. Now I can do something better

Do better....if only I realized that long ago.

1 Month Ago

"What a strange guy..." I was pondering why he was so...odd, he wasn't a noble, I think, but he certainly wasn't a monster. But there's something about him I can't quite put my finger on. So I just opened the window in my room, and stared out at the sky ahead of me. One thing I did enjoy, was not being stuck in a damp, dungeon, just the thought of it made me...no, don't think about it

"But you still will, since all you do is whine." I was quickly forced to throw myself back towards the edge of my bed, as the black figure hung from the edge of the window, using its tail to pin itself upside-down. But he laughed. "Woah, easy with the trigger, Swifty!"

"R-Ruin...you're back?" I was puzzled, why now? He said he was going to be gone for a long time, but he quickly answered that, as he hopped into the room

"Well don't sound so disappointed, I was honestly expecting my little....agreements to go alot slower, but then again, Loki has been a bothersome tick." He rambled, still didn't know who Loki was, but then he pointed to me with an evil grin, his teeth sharp, and crooked. "But here I am, buddy."

"Ruin, what did you do?" I was worried, even terrified, he promised he wouldn't harm anyone that wasn't a threat. But then he laughed even more, twirling his finger around a purple flame

"Well...things got, messy." I froze at his words, my body wouldn't even more at the revelation, then his tail snapped towards my neck, as my eyes widened slightly, but his narrowed. "You're not reconsidering our plans, right?"

"N-No, how could I? After all, you d-did save me...." I couldn't do anything, even if I wanted to, he had me on a noose, so I had to let him use me as his scape-goat. "Just please, did you kill innocent people?"

"Hmm...." He removed his tail from my neck, the jagged end moving away from my throat, as he thought about it as if it was actually difficult to remember, then he shrugged. "Can you tell the difference between a child's scream, and a man's scream? Cause I freakin can't! I swear, throw them all in a soup, and you can never tell them apart."

I-I was going to be sick, I knew he was a monster, but this....this was even worse than Discord, than Sombra, he was insane! But I was quickly cut off again, as he grabbed me by my shoulders, looking directly at me with green eyes, as my pink eyes turned to pin-pricks.

"Remember our plan, and I swear, if you dare to back out, nothing will save you from me." Then he grinned as wide as a crescent moon. "You owe me!"

"R-right...i'm sorry...." I whispered, then he patted me on the head, before turning towards the window

"Good, Swifty. Now then, I heard you have a new visitor, a please, do keep an eye on him for me, I hate to find out that it was anyone I rather forget was trying to kill me." What did Chris have to do with- "Chris huh? Ha! Like Christ without the 'T', yep, im'ma crucify him later!"

And in a flash of green, he was gone, leaving me to not only worry about tonight, but about who I may have just endangered, i'm such an idiot!

Present Day

"Hey Swift! We got chocolate-chip cookies, they smell like raisins, but I swear they're chocolate-chips!" At Chris' voice, I snapped out of mu daydream to see him standing beside the tree, before he pointed at the water. "Why the hell do you always come out here! I fucking drown in water you know! Blacklight, Devil Fruit, remember?"

"Oh! Ok, i'm coming!" I called over, before I turned to follow after him, but I swear I saw something from the corner of my eye, its green glare staring at me with a wide, crooked grin

To Be Continued...

Author's Note

Well shit. Chris is being played for a fool, if he wasn't already one. But to clarify, Loki is going to be around a lot more often.

Enjoy, since Lucaridis still uses me to write, as he yells in my ear.

Sincerely, Slendy

Where can you buy a whip?

Go back to hell.

The Taken Queen

"Have you tried dodging?" I explained, as I watched Swift's body go flying into the sand again, the green-scaled snake coiled back into a defence position, hissing at Swift who picked herself up from the boiling sand again. Now, having a maid being a force of power is not what many expect to take seriously. "Duck!"

She didn't duck. As I watched the snake throw her flying into the stone beside me, as she panted for breath. Back to my monologue, I decided to invest in making Swift far more...durable, if the last two hours weren't a clear example on necessity. She now wore all white, with a skinny jeans, and a jacket to match, underneath was a breastplate, i'm not that stupid. Next was the pauldron, and the short sleeves of the jacket left room for the metal plates along her arms, with padded gloves. Hazel boots, and a hazel sheave for the Void Edge.

"For all that is holy, focus...my blacklight's dying over here!" I called to her again, as I watched the mini basilisk whip her side, knocking her to her knees with a cough, oh for fucks sake....

I stepped up from the rock, looking down at the snake with a bored expression, before I placed my fingers in an 'X' formation.

*kage bunshin no jutsu*

In an instant, and puff of smoke, five clones of my Blacklight armour appeared, before they rushed the snake, easily avoiding the snake's attempts to attack, before they pinned its head, and tail in place, allowing me time to stretch, and sigh in utter disappointment.

"Will over will." I muttered, before Swift looked up in a sad motion. "Don't try your luck, I'm half-dead, and mostly bored, so you either 'Take' the snake, or im'ma beat you with the snake. Got it?"

". . . Crystal." She pouted, before I grabbed the blade from her back, swinging it around with ease, then, I stared down at the snake, its eyes glaring in hunger at mine, then I placed my foot atop its head, before its glare finally wavered under me, and within a few moments of silence, the form of the snake turned to black, and white, before it vanished in a flash

Then, within a few seconds a more horrid form of the basilisk appeared, with only one eye in the center of its face, with the rest of its body being a molten black, and grey. Then, my shadows vanished, as I threw the sword back at Swift, who managed to catch it.

"The power to take anyone is very interesting, you need to will your own self over them, make them fear you, obey you, that is how you take them. If you can't do that, then you might as well die from what i'm about to do." Am I being a cunt? Yes, yes I am, for good reason, no one got strong by being nice, clear fact of life, so, this is a sure fire way to expedite the process.

"Wait." I sat my foot back on the sand, before getting a feeling of deja vu wash over me. "You continue to help me, but why? Am I not just a problem? I mean, you broke the moon, why do you need my help!?"

"Hmm...that's a good point...might need to dwell on that, in the mean time." I then slammed my foot into the sand, shaking the whole area like a shockwave of energy, before I pulled my foot back, the spines on the bottom of my foot retracting. "Right, you either live, or you don't. But fuck it."

And as the sand beneath us slowly shifted, and stirred, I hoped back onto my rock, waiting for the big event, and possible loss of limbs, but the latter was a debatable judgment. Meh, more biomass for me.

*Swift's POV*

"Now, I never said this, but don't scream, they sense by sound, and movement!" I heard Chris yell, as I looked from the sand, and back to him in a frantic attempt to understand what he just did. Sadly, being knocked onto my ass again proved to be a good indicator

From the sand rose a massive serpent, its mouth laced with two jagged fangs, with emerald-blue scales, then it smashed into the sand, sending a wave of dust into the air, as I gulped in fear as I watched it stare down at me in what could be described as contempt.

Then I ran, avoiding its maw at it smashed through the sand like water, then I flew over its body, as it tried to circle me. However, I was nearly knocked out by its head, as it came swinging round, my body rolling across its rugged scales, and onto an old path within the ruins. But it was relentless, as I screamed from its mouth crunching down beside me, shattering the sandstone.

Why am I doing any of this, it makes no sense!? Sure, Loki gave me these powers, but how can I do anything to stop Ruin, he's apart of me! I gave everything I had to be free, and he did that, but at what cost? Everything will either be wiped out, or completely destroyed in the cross-fire between Chris, and Loki. So why me!?

I stopped thinking, as the tail of the serpent thrashed through the stone, knocking me flying into a wall, before I was headbutted through the stone, causing my whole body to convulse in agony. My body rolled a bit, but I managed to push myself back to my feet, using Void Edge as a crutch, since I felt my ankle give out from my weight.

At this point, I was tired, in pain, and my mind was screaming for me to stop. But if I did, well, the collapsing ruins behind me. Honestly, what's the point. I then slid down the wall, hearing the roars echo down the derelict halls, seven managing to shake the whole foundation of the ruins.

Great, death by giant snake....how great. I've been used like a pawn, raped, nearly murdered, single-handily led the only person who's cared about me to his death multiple times, and worst of all, I've been given a chance to do better, I even told a God that, the beings that created us! And what did I do? I lied....typical.

"Remember our plan, and I swear, if youdareto back out, nothing will save you from me."

"You owe me!"

Before I could begin to wonder why 'that' memory resurfaced, I watched as the wall in front of me collapsed, as a massive tail shot through the gap, striking my chest as I flew into the open again, my lungs nearly collapsed entirely, as my heart rattled in my chest. I was back in the heat again, as I stumbled to my feet, my hands shaking as the lifted Void Edge again.

But I stopped quickly, my heart sinking as I peered down at the massive cliff below, some loose rock falling into the pit below as I stumbled back, only to hear the massive hiss. That made me turn, only to come face-to-face with a colossal, thirty foot long serpent, its eyes staring at me with the intent to maul my body into chunks.

"You know its rather sad...watching you struggle." W-What!? Ruin? "Who else? God?"

"I see you're in a jam, if you want, I can help...since we do have a role to fulfill, and I rather not loose you now." Is that it? "Well...what else would be necessary? Wait, you...you think that power is going to change your fate? Hahahaha! I swear, sometimes you crack me up, Swifty!"

At that remark, my posture froze in place, as I felt my breathing slow a little. I don't know why, but staring at Void Edge seemed to make me angry, almost like it was feeding off of me, but it was good, really good. I felt my teeth grind a little, as Void Edge's blade glowed a little more.

"Face the facts kid. You're no God. You're no Chris, and you're certainly no hero, you're just a maid." Ruin commented, before I felt my teeth shatter because I was gritting them so hard. Then, I gripped Void Edge with two hands, my pain completely drained, almost numb, but the power I felt, I loved it

"Yeah, well you know what!?" I snapped at Ruin. "Fuck Gods! Fuck This whole world! But most of all, FUCK YOU!!!"

"AND MY NAME IS SWIFT FEATHER YOU BLOODY ASSHOLE!!!" I was seeing red, quite literally, before I let out a bloodthirsty war cry at the Serpent, before the sand flew past us both, my arms, and blade covered in a beautiful, golden aura, as the muscles in my arms seemed to be more refined than skinny

When I glared back at the serpent, it had already made its approach, but I could see around my wrists, blue bolts of Ki coursing across my arms, sending waves of power through my body. I see now, Loki didn't just give me power, he made it bend to me, and 'only' me! No Nightmare had control, only me.

When I saw the serpent loom over me, I glared up, before my wings launched me into the sky, narrowly missing the massive reptile easily, then I swung my arms around, as Void Edge struck the side of the serpent's jaw, leaving behind a purple streak of void. Then I spun in the air, striking downwards, creating an 'X' on its face.

But the head swung itself into me, knocking me into a nearby pillar, as I grit my teeth in pain, but my glare was still present. Then I planted my feet on the pillar, before launching myself at the serpent, as it lashed towards me, but I did a back-flip in the air, ducking under the serpent's head, before pulling Void Edge to my right guard.

The first hit is was a horizontal swing from right to left , I immediately followed by an uppercut with the sword. I then then flew up and slashed it from left to right while spinning, twice. I quickly landed, facing it as I slashed an 'X' from top to bottom, before inversely slashing the X again from bottom to top. I then leapt up at its underbelly, making two diagonal slashes from the same starting point, with void edge heading from top to bottom to the left, then I raised my left palm, before firing a small beam of Ki into its body, causing the serpent to cry out in pain, falling into the ruins behind it.

Then I flew up again, before I charged Void Edge with my Ki, then I swung randomly in the serpent's direction, sending a wave of Ki slashes towards its body, but I gasped, as the tail swooped up from behind, before slapping towards the earth, then the head appear from the sand, smashing into my body as spiraled through the air uncontrollably. But I quickly recovered, shaking my head.

Then I sheaved Void Edge, flying farther into the sky, before the Serpent was nothing more than a worm to me, but I could tell, I could fly higher now, see things in perfect harmony, it was amazing, I felt so much more powerful, and now, I'm done with this bloody pest, I was going to make it 'Mine'.

So I shot towards it again, the wind beginning to whistle past my ears from the velocity I came crashing down at. Then I pulled Void Edge out, pointing it down with both my hands like an arrow, before I yelled out in pure anger, everything ive endured was let out in this one moment, and it felt amazing!

Then, like a speeding burst of magic, I held my hands to my sides, as my head crashed into the top of the serpents skull, releasing a massive crack into the air, before its dying scream crashed into the sands with it, as my body slowly floated to the ground, Void Edge to my right as I continued to glare with teal-colored eyes, my hair standing on edge with a golden glow.

Then, as the sand cleared, I stared at the head of the beast, its body unmoving, as it stared back at me in defeat. I slowly stood before it, before I raised the tip of Void Edge, pointing it directly at its eyes.

"You belong to 'me'." I spat, and within only seconds, its eyes shut, and its body was slowly consumed by the magic before me. But I could feel it, the might of the serpent, its soul was now mine, its heart beat in unison with my own. I've taken it as my own. I sighed, my hair falling back in place, as my pink eyes returned too, as I smiled a little in pride. "I did it."

"You have no idea what you've done..." Ruin. "This isn't over, Swift Feather."

But as his voice vanished from my mind, I was caught off guard by the appearance of Chris, and before I could begin to explain anything, or even what just happened, he...embraced me? He actually held me in a hug for a few seconds, but I froze a little, my mind unable to understand why, but when I looked at him with surprise, he was crying!?

"That was fucking beautiful!" He complimented, as he then pointed to Void Edge. "So much for training. I guess, 'learning to sprint before you walk', works best."

"I-Um, yeah. But, i'm just as surprised as you are." I answered, as I carefully placed Void Edge back in its sheath.

Author's Note

First off, I wasn't done, but I guess this is still pretty awesome. Hope you enjoyed our work.

Sincerely, Slendy

CHRIS: Controlling Hybridized Reaver of Intelligence and Specimens

In Short, this is a basic summery of Chris' known abilities, and weaponry

Main
-Destiny Light (Able to use any subclass as one desires)
-Blacklight (Basically near immortality/But stay away from fire)
-Avatar (Can control the 4 elements/including blood, sand, metal etc.)
-Jackal and Casull (Alucard's weapons)

Rabbit DNA
-Agility increase.
-More sensitive hearing.
-Increase jump height.
-An animals instinct to detect danger.

Manticore DNA
-Manticore venom, numbs the nerves before stopping the heart.
-Enhanced senses
-Knowledge of the beasts in this forest.

Demonic DNA
-Demon blood, can transform into a demon and has a resistance to hellish attacks.
-Arcane knowledge, I know the hows and whys of magic but not the ability to cast.
-Claws, not to be mistaken for the foot long blades of death, these claws are smaller and look similar to really sharp fingers.

Diamond Dog DNA
-I can now dig through the earth like it's play dough.
-A greater sense of smell.
-Dog like hearing.

Unknown Creature DNA (Xenomorph-like creature)
- Magic cells, you can now take in the ambient magic of the world and charge your cells with them giving you the ability to use magic.
- Acid glands, turn biomass into a corrosive liquid or gas.
- High impact shell, this armour upgrade makes it so dermal armour can ignore damage from attacks that move at incredible speeds or hit dangerously hard, like a bullet or a trian.
- Scent, people and animals give certain smells depending on their intentions.
- Echolocation, use sounds to see all around you.
-Wall crawl, can stick to surfaces.
-Bladed tail, a tail that can glide through flesh with ease.
-Cold immunity, can thrive in the most extreme blizzards without any discomfort.

3 Types of Magically Gifted Humans
-Terran magic, with this I you can influence plants and animals to a degree. The more magic you gain the more control over nature you get.
-Muscle mass/Terran physiology, with the consumption of many Terrans you have gained the ability to increase the mass of your muscles.

-Avious magic, can manipulate the weather and even stand on clouds.
-Avious physiology, like an angel of death you are now capable of flight, as long as your wings are stong enough to compensate for your emense weight.

-Magi magic, with the consumption of many magi, you can now perform they're spells easier.
-Magi physiology, magi have magically conductive bones and circuitry making spells easier to do and more powerful.
-Devastation, with the amount of biomass you have absorbed you can now do a Devastation attack that is liable to kill everything short of a large dragon with incredible viral tendrils that spray everywhere in a three hundred and sixty degree and angle around you. This attack causes you to lose a chunk of your biomass.

New Gear
-Azreals' blade from Lucifer (Don't cut yourself)
-Darksaber (I am one with the force, the force is with me)
-Devil Fruit (Don't go swimming)
-Versatrix (The multiverse DNA storage device)

Boxes
-Rinnegan (Don't know what that is, but apparently its cool. Sensing enery, instantly learn skills by looking at them, all element affinities, Six Paths, black receivers.))
-Sharingan (A combination of all of them. Amaterasu, Tsukuyomi, Kamui e.g)
-Unknown revolver (Even Me and Lucaridis don't know what it does)
-Soul Magic (Sense souls, control them, tear them from a person)
-Sayian Blood (Able to obtain and control super sayain forms)
-Zenkia Burst (Stronger with every near-death experience)

Dragon DNA
-Adult Dragon's Blood (Everything Spike has but stronger)
-Gem Breakdown (Can consume, and gain magical power from gemstones)
-Tougher Skin (Skin as hard as dragon scales)
-Thu'um (Dragon speech/Roar)

Netherealm Power
-Crimson Paladin (Now a royal guard of the Nether realm)
-Sacred Flame (Completely immune to fire)
-Pyromania (Can control fire and create weapons made of fire)

Author's Note

So, decided to jump into Lucaridis' account to upload this, since we can barely keep track of all his powers. So consider this a bonus chapter, but be warned, this is far from Chris' true power (To which i'm dreading).

Sincerely, Slendy

P.S. I did us both a favor, Sloth

Training Time

Ahh, the Everfree forest. My first month was spent here and now I shall spend another. I do, love the feeling of nostalgia, it makes me feel... Happy, no, I suppose nostalgic is probably the proper word. 'cause, you know, nostalgia makes you nostalgic. "Nossstallllgiiiaaaaa. Hmmhm, I like that word."

Righto, training, do I even need to train, no, but I will because I have the Sharingan and the Rennigan and that means I have chakra and that, means I can Shadow clones which in turn means I can probably squeeze a couple years of training out of this month. Go me.

Pausing midstep I close my eyes and focus on my cells, more specifically, my chakra cells. Forcing Blacklight to do its thing, I make them bigger and more productive meaning I can use them more and gain back chakra faster, honestly, I spoil myself sometimes. Mabye I should produce an artificial heart, it makes chakra as well, doesn't it? On second thought no, a doesn't feel all that appealing and it probably wouldn't beat without actively trying to make it.

Performing the correct hand signs I pump a shit ton of chakra into the shadow clone jutsu and the result was most pleasing. At the very least there was a couple hundred me's running around, it was like Mr Meeseeks or something.

"What do ya need, Mother." Oh dear God, that was loud. What the hell, I really should have expected that, it was about three hundred voices at the sams time.

"Hold up, Mother, fuck's this about?" No really, do I look like a girl... Am I a trap then, oh God.

"We are-" Jesus!

"ONE! One of you speak, not all of you, just one." probably should have just summoned a couple at first, ah well, hindsight 20/20 and all that jazz. A random clone steps forward in what I hope be an explanation.

"Blacklight can make a hive mind, right? So, in a way, we are the hive which makes you the queen because hives don't really have kings. The only person to have a decent hive mind in Prototype was Greene and she figured herself a mother which means your now mother." Ok, what the hell.

"That was the dumbest shit i've ever heard in my life... and I've been to spaz-land." Spaz-land, how I wish I could forget that place, it practically breeds autism. Never again shall I do charity work. "Anyway, this isn't about those disgusting vermin, this is about superiority. Those princesses think they can leash me, prevent my evolution, but they will fail and I swear to all that is holy, I AM going to sing 'P is for Perfect' when I beat them!

*3 Weeks Later*

"Right-o. Glen one-hundred, and Glen two-hundred and seventy four! I need to test something!" At my call, the two identical me's appeared, both awaiting my command, as the other 298 me's continued to train, one was even training how to use a typewriter, trying to re-word the whole Star Wars series. So far, he's gotten to the third movie

"Now, I need you-" I pointed to number 274. "-To stand over there, and 100, I need you to continue practicing, and master the 8 paths on him." I ordered, as the two blinked for a moment, before they bowed, and proceeded to the empty field ahead, as I watched the other 298 join me in watching this show of awesomely-overpowered feats

Right now, the two were staring directly at each other like awaiting my command, then, I watched as 100 stared to glow with a sickening purple glow, before his body flew towards 274, causing a back-draft of air to nearly knock us flying. The Gate of Opening. Then in a flash of purple, 100 flew right through 274, knocking him to his knees.

Next was The Gate of Healing. At the new level of power, I watched as 100 vanished info a moving line of purple, before he struck 274 down to its back with a strike from below, then proceeding to kick him with an axe-kick on the head. When the dust settled, the clone rose from the hole, dusting itself off, as I watched its arm turn to shadows again.

"Shit. One of you replace him..." I muttered, as one took the place at the fading shadow, my mind thumping from the linked pain of being struck with the equivalent of a railgun to the head, chin, and chest. I then watched as 100 grunted, blood leaking from its mouth, before evaporating into red smoke, before I watched its body turn a darker shade of crimson. "Huh, already at Gate of Life."

100 then flew forwards, landing a solid, bone-shattering kick to the clone, sending it flying into the air, before 100 a flurry of strikes into the clone's body, 100's arms turning into nothing but flashes of red, and purple. Before I brought its palm above its head, before decapitating the clone entirely mid-air.

When a new clone took its fate to the battlefield, I watched as the forth Gate was activated, as 100 came crashing towards the earth like a comet. Then, in a flash of golden light, the two shadows being consumed by the massive release of magic power. Then, I nearly toppled over in pain, as I watched my clones all vanish from the intense light, which was now flickering like golden flames? Now that's strange, I don't-Oh fuck...

When the flames did subside, my clones were gone, along with my knees apparently, as I coughed up the equivalent of blacklight blood, before I looked up with a grin at the two Gods before me. Loki looked like a cross between calm, and 'I'm going to put my pain into your souls', and the other....was a girl? Not amused.

She was glaring with a fierce look in her golden eyes, as she moved a strand of orange-golden hair from her eyes. Then I watched as a blade appeared from thin-air, the tip stopping just before my neck. Ok, she's going through that time of the month.

"So, once again this clown's clown has nearly brought his own destruction. Prefect." She spat with a narrowed look, before I quickly stood up, pushing the flaming blade aside, my finger melting from the contact. Ow! "I can control flames, so try it again."

So I did, pushing my hand right through the blade, before I nearly screamed in pain from my hand turning to ashes in an instant. Ok, she was serious, and completely unfazed by that, damn she's good. Then Loki tapped his cane on the dirt.

"Serafin, please, don't provoke him, he's very persistent." Thanks for the vote of confidence Loki. "Shut it, you really fucked yourself this time."

"What Loki is trying to say, is that you nearly killed yourself without your own knowledge." Serafin...wait, the Nether Goddess? Great, another one. Then I watched as the blade was pointed directly at my eye. "Pay. Attention."

"I would, but you lost me at....Loki's name." I answered, as she blinked, before Loki pushed her back gently

"Ok-Ok, chill Serafin, I got this." Loki reassured with a sweat-drop, then he quickly spun on his heel, the Goddess tapping her finger against her arm. "Right, you. I just thought I let you know that even with those abilities, you're body will still be massively affected by the drawbacks. Therefore, stick to anything below 6 paths, if you go higher, I can't confirm you'll get another chance of avoiding Hell."

"So everything else is game?" I questioned, as I thought about it. There's still more applications of chakra that don't require my body to go through a breakdown of cells. So I just shrugged, before the temperature around us seemed to grow cooler. "Meh, I still got alot of other neat things to try, so one ability won't bite."

"Good, atleast he has his head on straighter than most." Serafin grunted, before her blade vanished into a puff of flames, before she approached me, punching me lightly in the chest. "Try that again, and no blacklight is going to fix you when i'm done. Got it?"

"Crystal." I muttered, before adding. "You could loose the blaze-like attitude next time." I don''t know why, but that did something. Now, being highly evolved sociopath, I can see even subtle movements, even down to her eyes reflecting...pain? That's new, so is most of the things ive learned in the last month

"R-Right. Seeya around, Loki." Wait, that's it? Apparently so, since she just up and vanished in burst of flames like a phoenix. I just stood there for a moment in confusion, not before Loki looked annoyed, before he sighed, looking like someone just shot his cat

"Couldn't have phrased that better, huh?" Loki mused, before pointing behind him at nothing. "I hate to say it, but bringing up her dead-husband's name was a near hit-and-miss."

"Wait what?" Shit, feeling rather guilty now

"Yeah you bloody sociopath!" Loki retorted, before grunting in annoyance, pulling on his face. "This is gunna be my weekend, isn't it?" Then he tapped the air behind him, a rift bubbling from the reality around the air

"So...not gunna tell me more?" I asked, being genuinely curious about who 'Blaze' is?

"Nope." He shot quickly, before adding. "Like I've boasted before, i've lived for like...a long time, so expect me to meet people who I hate bringing up, good? Good. Now go do me a solid and head to this location." He then handed me a scrap piece a paper

"Oh, and take this, trust me, it will make sense when you use it." Next came a box, which landed safely in my hands, then he walked through the rift, before tipping his hat, along with my sense of gravity, as I felt the entire planet turn with his hat, before vanishing within the portal

"Well...today was productive, and awkward." I spoke to no one in particular, before I opened the scrap piece of paper. At first, I just read off a bunch of location details, but then a small smile grew into a large, twisted grin, my eyes blazing with fury at the name, but as I did, I watched as an aura of blue completely covered my body, before I watched the chips of blue shatter, revealing a new, royal blue glow to my body's eyes

I felt my eyes turn a new shade of royal-blue too, along with my hair standing up straight again, as I watched for a mere millisecond as red flashed along my hair, before staying on a new, blue aura of power.

"Super Sayian Royal Blue? Something's different, Super Sayian God flash for a moment....ok, now i'm interested." I was nearly the form of a God now, this certainly wasn't planned, neither was most of what's happened, but fuck it. So I turned on my heel, staring towards the vast forest ahead of me, or what was left, as the forest now burned with blue flames

Then I grinned sickeningly, like some deranged animal. This was near the power of a God, how the hell could these mutts possibly compare to me? They want nothing more than to please their God, right me? Well then....

"How's about I give these Caribou a God?" I say as I summon hundreds of super sayian blue shadow clones covered in Susanoo.

To Be Continued...

Author's Note

Just a heads up, we gunna get into alot of graphic shit next time, then again, fuck it, its the Caribou.

We're gunna work for this 'M' rating!

Sincerely, Slendy

World Edit

"Peaceful young races with fire on their houses..."

"Millions of voices all silenced like mouses..."

"Watching the cowards bow toward their new king..."

"These are a few of my favorite things..."

At my charming voice of hell, not a single Caribou spoke, none moved nor blinked. I was happily standing in the middle of their fortress, in their capital, now, I watched as they all moved from their seats, clad in hides of I don't know what, i'm probably have some of it inside me though. But one of them moved before me, standing with a stern look on his putrid face, even from here, I could smell the sent of lust seeping from his being.

"So...you must be one of the higher ups? Correct?" I asked calmly, trying to keep my anger in check. Little fact, I 'hate' rapists, like, I would peel their dicks like bananas, then proceed to skin them alive in front of each other. That's putting it lightly. "Or am I still a ways-away from anyone important?"

"No. I am General-"

"I don't care for side-character names, just answer my question, this place reeks like a Catholic priest's basement. So tell me, is your Ki....Leader here?" I asked, my tone turning a little violent near the end, but I could see his eyes flicker with anger, but before he could foolishly try to attack me, I watched as a-Holy fuck-balls this creature looks like a living scrotum that's been headbutted with a belt sander

"Now-Now, there's no need for any bloodshed, after all we're all the same here?" Tell me how I can possibly be related to this walking cactus? That actually made me laugh a little.

"How the hell is a Nazi compared to you? You're rapists, i'm....a genocidal monster." I answered for him, but something was...off, like, he's on to me type of 'off'. But, I guess he wanted to continue, good, buys more time for my plan.

"I can understand that, but judging by your past experiences, you've been used as a pawn by not only the princesses of Equestira, but also by one of your own...female comrades." Oh My Loooooooki. Sensing my distaste, he decided to wrap up his little villain speech. "You see? I have seen what you've struggled through. " Hahahaha!!! "So why not free yourself from your chains, join us, and you'll be given a new life of freedom."

"Ok, even with your...really bad offer, I can't really accept, since someone would not only have my head for it, but I'll then have to listen to Swift give me an earful, and that's atleast....five minutes of my time, besides, i'm made of like... a thousand genders, I mean, there's only two, but that's another grey area I want to avoid." I explained to the Caribou before me, then I clicked my fingers. "Also, bow."

In a mere instant, all subjects before me were now struggling to hold themselves up, all collapsing to the floor like rats, but with my ears, I could hear the snapping of bones, followed by the tearing for flesh and screams of the fallen, then I looked down at the grovelling masses with a smile.

"Ok, now that I have your ears as well as your spines, allow me to tell you what I truly think not of you, but of this whole situation of mine." I began, before one groaned in pain

"My foot's behind my ear, and I don't think its suppose to do that!" He cried out, as my smile of anger grew

"Spectacular! Now then...." I cleared my throat, before my frown shot onto my face with more disgust than the emotion itself. "You are by far the most annoying, most putrid race of sapience i've seen wasted on this fucking world, I mean, oxygen is wasted on you all because of your lust for wealth and sex, I mean, ever heard of a hand?"

"But by far, the worst thing you could have done, that not even the princesses were mentally defective enough to try, was that you 'checked' my mind, if you've seen my memories, than you know what i've done, you've seen what I can do, and if you think for even a fucking second that I can't erase your existence from this world, then, hohoho, you are fucking 'dead' wrong!"

"And besides...." I then walked towards the priest, before my blacklight wrapped around my arm, as it became blunt, more twisted, before it popped off my hand, allowing me to hold a black and red mutant barbed bat, and she is awesome! "...Sometimes, you need to know when to hold them, and when to fold them, and boi....its folding time."

"H-how could you!?" He managed to spit out, as my arm rose, the demonic bat hanging above us both in anticipation, then I grinned like a maniac

"I now dub you all....Glen." Then the hammer, or this case, bat came down. The first strike made his head bounce from my force, blood coating the bat quickly, some beginning to leak down the old fools face, his eyes struggling to stay open, then I laughed. "Woah, didn't think rapists could last after one strike, guess I was wrong!"

The bat smashed into his head once more, the sound of his skull cracking echoed among the crowd in horror, before I began to completely pound the sod's head in. Swing after swing my bat brought forth more of the creatures blood until the very room was painted in crimson juice, bone fragments and grey matter. I finally stopped when his body eventually stopped twitching, his life leaving him as I very forcefully prevent my instincts from consuming what was left. Admiring my work I set the bat on fire and allow the blood stained weapon to burn, along with all Caribou DNA. Pausing for a moment I listen to the explosions beginning in the background. Channeling my inner emo jedi I speak.

"This is were the fun begins." feeling my insides attempt to revolt at the statement. I chuckle, smelling (and gagging slightly) at the scent of the king of the castle, so to speak.

"Alright, which limp dick, slut loving, piece of cunt thinks they can fuck with me and my Kingdom?!" Holy crap, you gotta admire that language, it's like, some black dude with something to prove.

"Ahh! Skidmark! Wait... That's a different story. HEY FUCKFACE!" I shout gaining the attention of the Caribou leader.

"So it was you. Give me a reason why I shouldn't tuen you into a cunt and have you fucked brain dead."...

"I got to admit, that threat made me slightly uncomfortable... Good for you. Anyway since you've effectively killed my positive vibes I'm just gonna burn this shit stain to the ground." Haha, that'll show'em.

"Now listen here you piece of-"

"SUPER SAIYAN SHADOW CLONE SUSANOO X5000" Why the fuck did I shout that.

"Why the fuck did you shout that?" It disturbs me greatly to know that piece of shit knows what i'm thinking.

Without much notice the walls of the fortress all started crumbling and with the use of my Rennigan I saw that it was my clones using earth chakra to tear down all the buildings in the city causing rubble to crush most of the inhabitants both inside and outside. Smiling at the destruction and a little glad they didn't drop this entire fortress on top of me because that would be sad. Probably not actually, I mean, it would save a hell of a lot of time.

"You-you fucking piece of... You are going to die." Ohh~ kitty got claws. That was gay, not homosexual, just gay.

"No u." What the hell happened to that bottomless pit of rage I had. Honestly, it just isn't the same without it. Le sigh. Besides, he didn't even say "Your mom gay."

Is that a fist in my face, yes, that is indeed a fist in my face. But all that came after it was the sound of a bone cracking, before I watched a shard of his arm-bone split from his flesh and skin, spraying blood onto the king's face, as I just blinked a little at the sudden contact of bone meeting blacklight.

"Now you see, 'that' there wasn't so smart. Seriously, if I can clone myself five-thousand times over, drop your best....guards to their knees, and use my own body to create a bat strong enough to shatter that priest's skull into the gravel, then oh boy, you fucked up." I explained, the king not even yelling in the tremendous pain his arm must be causing him, so he dropped his arm to his side, glaring down at me with a crimson glare

"Just....what do you want, monster?" Oh? I'm a monster? Now that's a little hypocritical, eh king? But then I grinned at his distaut face

"I'm nothing more than three simple things." I began, my mind anticipating my next move with a new found lust for pain. "One, I was conscripted by a God to do things to bad people, since why not? Two, Glen who is currently turning the gravel beneath me red, thought it be a grand idea to get inside my head and then proceed to use Swift as if she was an object of trade, big mistake. Three....and, I need you to pay attention to this one..."

At my words, I stepped a little closer my hand carefully reaching towards his chest, then, before he even had the mental capacity to understand what was about to happen, his face soon contorted with a mix of both shock and agony, but I could feel it, the rapid beating between my fingers, the blood trickling down my arm from the chest wound I made, even the ribs were jabbing my arm in protest.

"Three...you're a monster, I'm evil, and you want to know the difference?" I asked kindly, before my hand retracted, pulling the king's heart out of his chest with ease, causing a sea of crimson to spray into the air around us, the blood trickling down my face with glee. "One of us has the intelligence to erase the other, that, and nothing is going to stop me!"

With my grin spreading like a crooked scythe, I began to laugh like a deranged animal, multiple voices I've consumed joining my own in my amusement, the onlookers now staring at me with pure terror, as my voice grew colder, more deeper, then my hand rose to my left, before a loud click rattled the air, and in a mere second, everything collapsed.

Shinra Tensei

I can't really say I'm impressed with my work, since I just realized that innocent lives were most likely among the crowd I just turned to soil, and judging by the nothingness around me, I can surly say that there's nothing to salvage from this situation, oh well, no use trying to act all depressed, since that never solved anything.

"Huh, that was rather depressing, shit." I muttered to the nothing around me, hell, my voice was echoing around me, man, is it just me or am I feeling...lost, not that I can't find my way back, since I did kill everything on my way here, but....hmm, I can't quite understand what's bothering me for once, strange, thought blacklight would have fixed that

"You are just weird, you know that, right?" Hold up, since when does anyone talk to me? "Behind you, dipshit."

At that, turning to see Ruin standing among a glowing pool of colours was the last thing I expected to see, nor the fact he hasn't tried to stab me again. But judging by his narrowed expression, he wasn't here for a fight.

"What do you want? Kind-of trying to think." I asked, but he just laughed, the glowing aura of blacks, blues, and whites all slowly vanishing into....his....body-oh for fuck sake. "I done goofed, correct?"

"Well, not entirely, but....yeah, if you call erasing another problem for me, giving me more souls, and throwing multiple opportunities to kill me to the wind, then yes, you did." I was beginning to see why I hate him again, but that only made his hand raise to stop my motion

"Now-Now, I just wanted to see how poorly your efforts have been to stop me, nothing more." Was he...trying to agitate me? "Besides, even if you did try using your new upgrades, that being your month of training, using your shadows to train for you and stuff, you honestly still can't grasp the extent as to why Loki has sent you after me."

"Now I'm interested, explain?" Ok, he's interested me, so what does he know that I don't? Mostly likely alot of things, but I don't like the look on his face, he was too happy

"I guess you've met Serafin, correct?" I nodded. "Right, then you must know that Loki hates seeing that annoying bitch upset, much as he tries to hide it, but did he ever tell you why that's the case? Then again, why am I asking, you don't know."

"Get to the point." I snapped

"The reason for her sadness and Loki's mixed emotions of pain and anger towards me, well, its because I 'was' him, Blaze I mean, well, not entirely." Ok, jaw has actually hit the floor at this point, but Ruin didn't seem amused. "Mock me again, see what happens."

"Ok fine, then who is this 'Blaze'? Better yet, why should I even care? This happened a long time ago or something, and I know nothing about any of them, so why, pray tell, should I care?" I asked, before Ruin clapped his hands together, before his hand shifted slightly to the side

"Because...." Wait, when did the moon start to scar? Can a moon even scar? Hold on, duh fuck!? "Oh! I guess you just realized my new augments, 'new' being that I haven't used this trick in a long time. Call it....what was it again? Stupid memories..."

Upon closer inspection, I noticed the vast amount of weaponry floating behind Ruin, they weren't special, but most looked old, rusted, or near broken by the cured and cracked formations along their blade. Then I could see it, a strange, green hue coating them all, matching Ruin's energy to a 'T'.

"Serrated Edge. Sorry, had a slight memory gap, but lets just say, you don't want my hand to drop right now." Ruin grinned with amusement at my now froze form. "Ah, you realized it too. Yeah, if even a single blade scratches you, then bye-bye to your soul!"

"What's you game? Cause all I've gathered here is that you used to be someone good, you then turned bad, you're most likely on par with Loki, and you have me against the wall." I asked, since attacking would be fruitless, if I missed, he'd kill me, and bugger off...well shit

"Honestly, I was expecting a bit more bite from you, but I guess I can wait." Ruin sighed, his fingers clicking, as the clattering blades fell from the sky and to his feet, then he narrowed his pupiless eyes again. "You have two options. You either leave this world behind, so grab your friends, grab your shit, and go....or die, and please, make the right choice, because I won't be as 'calm' next time we meet."

Then he was gone, again, leaving me to question what to do next.

"I'm so going to fuck his cat when I'm done."

Author's Note

Oh look, we missed a week, let the gate of hell be unleashed or something.

Sincerely, Slendy

Wee average chapter length.

Collective Mortals

The Equinox Battle Royal

The highly anticipated gladiator match between the monarchs Celestia and Luna and the highly efficient noble Chris Licht will consist of two defining rounds, and contain as followed

Round 1: One-Vs-All

In this lineup, any and all personal can choose the enter the arena against Chris, either solo or in a team, they will be given a full hour to attempt to take down Chris, using any methods they see fit. However, loss of limbs, skeletal structure, organs, soul, or all of the above is expected, so enter at your own risk

Round 2: Royal Clash

After round 1, the final round will be a tag-team against Chris, where Celestia and Luna may use whatever methods they see fit to eliminate Chris from the arena, however, the same can be said for Chris. The round will only end once one side has been defeated, or the arena falls off the mountain, order doesn't matter

"Well, they certain know how to care less about loss of lives in this place. I approve." I spoke to no one in particular, as my eyes moved from the sheet in front of me, and onto the massive arena ahead of me, to which I whistled at this world's attempts to make their architectural designs near perfect. "'Upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of Hades will not overpower it'....well I guess i'll be making a gate to hell, but that's alot of damage control."

*Here's an image since I'm bored*

Ok, I know seeing a battle between rulers is fan-fucking-tastic but this is rather much....I say this, and from the looks of both the stands and walls, everyone from across the world is here, hell, they even had some levitating in the air to grab the best view of the slaughter. But my view was on the many 'champions' that wanted a piece of me, quite literally since I saw diamond dogs too.

"-Are you even listening?" What-No-oh yeah, Swift's ranting again, judging by both her frustrated look, and the fact that her eyes were glowing like the Taken slightly was a dead give away

"Sorry, you lost me at...well you never had me in the first place. Repeat?" I answered, as Spike rolled his eyes in the background, groaning at my negligence, mostly likely due to the fact he has to listen to her again. I feel your pain, even if I can't physically do that

"Ok, because I know you won't listen again, just try not to kill anyone, its a fight, not a war." What's the difference? "Don't question me, I know you're thinking it." Shit. "Just...try."

"Meh, they're all monkeys and typewriters. But fine, last thing I need is another race being up my ass about 'global annihilation'." Lets be honest, I could honestly care less with what happens to anyone, they signed their fates when they jumped into the ring

"Right-o! Swifty, Spike, grab a seat and sit near the front, for this will be a splash zone!" With that said, I made my way towards the light and the roaring for the sound of beautiful violence

*Introduction Theme*

Standing among a crowd of people who actually 'liked' me, or just want to see someone thrown around like a ragdoll. But judging by the massive amount of head trauma i'm receiving is certainly noticeable. Then, the sound of...wood and bone conjoining in a failed relationship, where sex was the only thing that mattered came through the microphone system.

"Sup, bitches!" Oh for fuck's sake. "Sadly, your last commentator was....indisposed, so I will be taking the metaphorical reins for this autistic match-up, that I totally didn't set up for my own curiosity and boredom!"

"Now! Allow me to explain the regulations of the first match, that, and I know no-one here read the rules." Loki muttered, before clearing his throat. "First of, once you enter into the ring, even during the match, the only way out is either by painful torture to the point that you'll be begging to die, or you win . . . HAHAHAHAHAHA....oh yeah, you're all fucked...."

"The second, and only other rule, any infighting and I'll be sending you to hell." For some reason, everything went dead silent, even crickets were playing in the distance....it was getting rather awkward. "I-i'm being serious, one SINGLE misstep, and I'll send every gnat in this fuck-pit to the depths of brimstone and pride, since my brother is down there."

After the ringing in my bleeding ears died down, I saw Loki rubbing the sides of his temples, before he clicked his fingers once, before the roar of a war-horn tore through the mumbles in the crowd, then, he tapped the mic again. "Begin."

*Stop Music Bitches*

Cries of warfare rang a chorus once more, funnily enough, it was fun, the fact that most expect me to be some low-life snobbish playboy, yet, I'm a highly mutated....thing, with the powers to rival the moon, a whole range on mountains, a civilization and end some. Welp, guess I should make this atleast a bit more pleasurable. So, I fumbled through my interdimensional pockets, as many warriors leapt into the ring, all itching to make the first move.

"Ah, there it is." I said to no one in particular, as I found a small device that literally read the word 'Play', yet somehow I could tell what it was willing to play for me, and for once, a smile crept onto my twisted face as I pressed the button down, placing the device back in my pocket

"Stand back, comrades! For I shall slay this monster!" Oh first blood, when I turned around with a smile and gleam in my eyes, my hands moving to the beat of the song that played for the world before me. The man was clad in silver armour, a zweihander between his fingers, then he charged. "Have at thee!"

The first step he made was ultimately his last, as my dancing hands pointed up with two index fingers, before a massive pillar of rock flew from under the man, launching his body far from the arena, and off into the distance, allowing everyone to watch the silver star fly past them with an audible gasp. Then I saw Swift face-palm in irritation, whist Spike cheered on, whist the main 6 looked really, 'really' stunned.

"Don't stop me now!" I sung with a grin, as multiple raid parties came at me, as my right leg stayed in place, twisting my body round to kick to across the neck, knocking them into the sandy dunes, before my knee shattered, allowing me to bend down completely, my right foot planted firmly in place, before I shot up, shattering the mace above my body, and puncturing the helmet of the man with the shards

I then turned around to face the three that remained, all shaking in fear, before my entire body coursed with arc light, before I conjured an arc staff, the electrical staff touching one of their shoulders lightly, before the three convulsed with spacial lightning, smoke rising from their bodies as the fell over in a heap.

The next thing to stop before my face was blazing ball of fire, as I watched the sky alight with an orange hue, a mix of all types of fires, but not a single one moved, since my hand was placed before the first, whist the mages before me tried to force their attacks to move, only to met with failure, so I clicked my fingers, before all the orbs of fire flew back towards their casters.

"AND LIKE THAT, ANOTHER MATCH, ANOTHER BATCH OF SUCKERS!!!"

Once the smoke cleared, I watched as....Griffons, oh shit.

"You! You'll pay for what you've done to our kind!" Oh yeah, that was me

"What's wrong, feeling homesick?" I mused, the remaining flames gathering in my hands, then in a flash of ash and fire, two simple, flaming katanas now rested in my hands, but I could feel the blacklight scream in irritation at the contact, as an aura of black gas leaked away from my palms, and my face. I even conjured a blade in my jaw, my teeth now clenched down on the brimstone handle

"T-Three swords!?" One of the survivors muttered, but the one in front grunted, before releasing a battle cry as the crafters-dozen moved in unison around me

"Well, anyone infront of Chris, move seats now." Loki warned

Santoryu Senhachiju Pound Ho

Within a flash of steel between my fingers and maw, the eight remaining Griffons were now out cold on the sand beneath my feet, the crowd was speechless as I heard the sound of limbs dropping to the sand, along with blood-soaked weapons rang before me. But the worst sound yet, was the crashing of rock and steel, as a portion of the arena fell off the mountain-side, sending rock and debris flying into the valley below.

Once my work was done, the flames turned to ash before me, as the blacklight that tried to escape finally stopped, and I was left with a few dozen opponents who were either scared shitless or fell into the ring by accident and were trying desperately to claw back out.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING!?" Wait...was that, no. My body turned again, as the blacklight bone snapped to turn 180 degrees, only for two pink eyes to burrow into me like a rabbit on speed, not gunna like, if I had blood, it be cold as ice

"What, you said 'not' to kill anyone, and I didn't!" I countered, before I pointed to the griffons. "The flames sealed the wounds so no harm down!"

"Do it again and I make sure Ruin can't fucking fix you!" Swift countered, and for once, I didn't reply, that, and a spear was currently rupturing my wind pipe. But God damn she makes me proud, seriously, since when did she ever threaten me? 'Cause, last I checked. She. Was. A. Maid.

"Do you mind...?" I asked, the spear snapping between the blacklight in my neck, before I turned to face the man. "Trying to have a conversation."

But the masked man paid no heed, and swung a dagger from his cloak, but it was easily knocked away by a twisted, black tail, as the point of my xenomorph tail pointed directly at the man's throat, but he didn't move an inch, hell, he didn't even blink.

"Damn, you got balls for someone with no weapon..." I mused, before my tail moved away from his neck. Before my eyes narrowed like a hunter. "Now I'm gunna make you my bitch."

Another second more, maybe he would have survived, but my tail quickly twisted around his leg, before I easily flung his body into another challenger, pinning both to the wall to my left. My tail retracted, blocking a blow from a cryomancer, but I watched as my tail froze on contact, before I pulled it back, staring down at my now stiff tail. So, I did the only thing necessary, besides inserting an erection joke.

I grabbed the frozen limb, before I snapped it off my body, then, I lunged the frozen tail towards the cryomancer like a spear, the blade knocking the staff from the girl's hand, pinning the staff against the sand. Only for the mage to conjure up another one in its place.

"Ok, so what's your saying?" I asked with a bored look, before a few more cold motherfuckers appeared before me

"We only wish to cleanse this world of you and the shadow that roams this world." The leader most likely, spoke

"Ever tried using bleach?" I muttered, before their staffs began to glow with magic, but I was still in a more bored state now, so I sat still as they fried their blasts of elemental magic towards me. Once contact was made, my body quickly rearranged my cells, converting the magic and breaking down all weaker forms to the their purist forms, leaving the more dominant magical ether for me to absorb to my mouth

*IIZ SLEN NUS*

From sand to ice. By the time I stopped breathing a wave of arctic ice, I was left with half the arena looking like the north pole, the mages were completely encased in ice, the only sign of life was the fact that their limbs still moved. But before I could relish in my easy victory, a group of misfits seemed to rally behind me, as their obvious battle cries rang out among the crowd, so I decided to have a little fun.

I quickly turned again, then I placed my hand before me, my eyes shutting as I allowed the Light in my body to hum, before the energy gathered between my fingers with more ferocity than the Thu'um. When my eyes opened, my hand held a Nightstalker's bow, with a Sunbreaker Hammer between the string and bow, whist the might of a Stormcaller surged through the hammer. Then, I released the string.

The first to suffer for their mistake was another insignificant character, when he tried to swing at the hammer, the mere instant the blade made contact with the hammer, the whole arena erupted into an aurora of light, whist a blackhole held the group back, as the weaker links fell to their knees, the arc lightning coursed across their body, combined with the air burning with such intensity.

"AND LIKE THAT, ONLY THIRTY CHALLENGERS REMAIN, AND I WON'T LIE, THE CHANCES OF ANY ONE OF YOU UNLUCKY SODS BEATING MY CREATION IS....WELL YOU WON'T WIN"

"He's got a point, and besides, you have all been very entertaining, but I'm only going to say this once." I stated calmly, before I pointed to the sand and ice. "Kneel."

"What the hell? Are you crazy!?" One yelled, as the rest all seemed to be foolish enough to agree. Well then, guess Ive gotta use the little number I did for the Caribou

"Oh...so you think you still have a shot at me? Now, while I can admire someone who has guts, they aren't really impressive if said guts were spilled across the floor and strung on the wall." I began, before I pointed down at the sand again. "And besides, even if it was the Monarchs themselves. I couldn't care less about what happens next."

"By now, some of you more perceptive individuals have noticed that I haven't moved my foot from this spot, for every inch of the fight, I have firmly planted my foot upon this sandy dune, and only now have I reached the point of completion." When I said that, I blew a bit of the sand away from around me, and from that, the whole crowd gasped

Dotting the sand were countless blacklight spines, all poking to just beneath the ground where I stood.

"Now, I'll ask again. Get down on your knees and forfeit, otherwise, I'll turn ever last one of you into an iron maiden." I asked as calmly as possible. To be honest, alot of them didn't even move, nor did any weapons drop to the sand beneath my feet, it was strange, I couldn't even sense any sign of defiance, hell, they 'feared' me, and yet not a single fucker dropped to their knees

"Obviously they won't, since they have the same stupidity as someone else I know." My body quickly turned to see...are you fucking kidding!? Why was Swift down here

"You have a serious anger problem too." And of course Loki, but he hardly seemed phased. "You do realize you ran out of time, right?"

"What?" When-I mean-how?

"Yeah, you were so caught up that I forgot to mention it to you like....10 seconds ago, but yeah, you won." Loki shrugged, I didn't realize it until now, but the crowd was cheering...for me....yeah, cheer for the guy who put half your best fighters into the sand, knocked on to the moon-donut, and erased a segment of the arena

"Now, I hate to tell you this, well actually I don't care, but the guys who are standing over there?" Loki pointed towards the remaining challengers, who were still standing as stiff as boards. "Yeah they passed out on their feet. Like, as in they can't hear us or anything and yet they're still standing with their weapons and stuff."

"You sure that isn't another power you have?" Oh ha ha.

"Not my fault their fucking pussies." I shrugged with as little tolerance as possible

"Then maybe we'll prove to be more...entertaining." Now this was what I was waiting three chapters for. Before us was the two prime fuckers of the world. Luna was coated in a black, midnight-blue armour, silver lining the edges of the jagged and crooked metal. In her hands were two scimitars. Both were silver with a strange, blue metal built into the blade and handle

"And believe us when we say, we won't hold anything back." And last was Sunbutt. Obviously she was wearing a set of golden armour, curved plating and build, with orange thrown into the mix for colour, what she held instead a Halberd in one hand. It was silver too, but gold was fixed into the metal between the axe and spear, whist a jagged tip stuck the sand

Now I was amused, the pressure building around even just one of them was crazy, almost like a blackhole was threatening, and with the blacklight still planted in the ground, it would take time to pull it back into my body, so I was actually weaker now. But who could blame me, the more deadly the opponent, the more fun it is to crush them beneath your feet.

"Are you sure there's no backing out now?" Swift asked no one in particular, as Loki grabbed her and vanished back to the stands, and away from the fucking slaughter that was about to begin

"WELL IF YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW, THEN LETS GET THIS SHITSTORM STARTED! BEGIN!"

"Hey, Princesses?" They then focused their gazes back to me, as I gave them a pleasant smile.

"You're gunna die."

Author's Note

3 Weeks and you get a chapter, have fun with that until next time.

I am a pleased individual

Red Sun and Silver Moon

*ROUND 2*

With the clear sign above us, and the sound of the dying crowd recovering from the last fight, I readied myself for an actual challenge. I didn't need anyone's opinion to know that these two were on levels of Gods in their own right, and with my blacklight needing time to merge with my body again, my strength was far lower. This was bad.

"Now then, without any delays, let me get introductions out of the way!" Loki announced, clearly pleased with the turn of events that have transpired. "On 'my' team. he's the undead bugger with more DNA than a petri dish, and who quite frankly eliminate a whole kingdom if pissed off. I give you, Shifting Light, Chris!"

"And representing the embodiment of Equestria, the celestial guardians of day and night. Red Sun, Celestia and Silver Moon, Luna!" Loki ended, allowing the violent-filled crowd to soak up the tension."FIGHT!!!"

"You know, even in this weakened state, I doubt this is going to end the way you picture it." I mused, easily antagonizing the two monarchs

"You'd be wise to not underestimate us." Luna warned me, the grip on her scimitar tightening, her foot moving to her side

"Wouldn't dream of it. If I could dream." I answered, before a certain glow emanated from Celestia. So I copied, summoning another arc staff to my hand. "Come on, give me all you got. If you beat me, I'll even do anything you command me to, no limitations."

"Big mistake!" Luna was gone, as in she became a shadow, then I watched as the shadows around me pointed up like spines, impaling multiple sections of my body to the ground. My arms were completely impaled, and my jaw had a nice spine stuck through the back of my throat

I just snapped my arm out of the hold, swinging my arc staff behind me, before it struck the scimitar, knocking Luna back, but she rolled, her body molting into the shadows around the edge of the ring. Then I ducked, avoiding Celestia's halberd as it missed my neck, before she spun, swinging the staff's axe down, shattering the stone beneath all the sand, before she swung to her left, catching my side and sending me rolling into the sand.

As I leapt to my feet mid-roll, I watched as the shadows grabbed my leg, pulling it through into the shadows, even with cold resistance, I could feel the frigid temperature snap away at my blacklight, then Luna resurfaced behind me, swinging her scimitar to my right, before I summoned my tail again, wrapping my xeno-tail around her arm as I struck her cheek, shattering the helmet's side as her focus released my foot.

Then I did a quick hand-stand, swinging my feet to boot her in the jaw, before I leapt from the sand, avoiding Celestia's flaming halberd, and landing on her head, dropping my knees on her skull, knocking her to the arena floor. Then I slid atop her back, kicking her body into Luna as she tried to recover.

When they did, I retracted my tail, before switching to two Sunbreaker hammers, waving one at the two of them. Nox recovered, the two teleported to my location, Celestia was first, thrusting her halberd forwards, as my hand caught it by the tip of the blade, the metal itself was ablaze, sending pulses of fire backwards, scorching the sand.

"You cannot win, kneel!" Really? She was serious?

"I don't think we're done just yet..." I grinned, before I flicked the blade back, kicking her left arm, before spinning and axe-kicking her head, or I would, if not for the scimitar flying past my foot to block my attack. "How's about I do just what humans were created to do. Get reckless."

Before either of them could comprehend why, my hammers reappeared, smashing the ground beneath them in a blaze of solar power, before my hand stretched through the flames, grabbing their faces, before smashing their head together, shattering the helmets into shards. Then I kicked Celestia in the stomach, before my left elbow cracked the jaw of Luna.

She recovered though, bouncing back to deliver a right hook to my shoulder, before her scimitar landed between my arm and shoulder, before she twisted, tearing the whole arm off in a quick twist, before she hooked her arm around my neck, then she smashed my face into her jagged knee, planting a new sheet of metal into my skull.

I tried to recover, but something grabbed my hair, pulling me off the leg guard. Celestia turned me to face her, before she grabbed my shirt, and before I realized what was happening. Nothing happened. No sound, no crowd, nothing. Expect the stars, donut moon and us.

"Space, thought this was Luna's shtick?" I asked, my arm struggling to regenerate, and my wounds nowhere near gone, this is bad. Celestia then raised her halberd into the void, and I actually was surprised to watch it slowly begin to grow in length, the blade now stretching into the void above us as I watched it fly away. "Oh fuck."

"Now you will learn that not every creature is weak." When did I say that? In all honesty, when did those specific words leave my mouth? Guess they did...somehow

I didn't really try to avoid her strike, so I watched as her flaming halberd thrusted through my chest, piercing me to the tip of the blade as the blacklight moved to avoid any irreparable damage, but now we were descending....towards the earth at....mach 20....oh fuck me.

As we descended towards the earth again, the re-entrance began to burn my back into ashes, as flakes of blacklight flew past me, I was a literal meteor descending towards the ground, but above me, nearly a kilometer away, Celestia seemed to smile a little, thinking she was winning this fight.

"Only one of us is going to walk away alive! Kneel!" She ordered, as I just coughed up more blacklight, before I gave her a deadpan stare

"I'm fucking miles in the air, how the fuck can I kneel you sunny bitch!?" I countered, but I don't think she heard me, or she doesn't care. Ah well, guess plan B will happen, hopefully, maybe....

When we broke through the clouds again, I heard Celestia call to me again.

"You are nothing more than a tyrant, you have so much power, and you use it for your sick games, you toy with my subjects, use them for your own ends and enjoyment, treating their emotions like a game. You're no better than that creature, you never should have set foot on my kingdom!" Celestia yelled, before we struck the arena again

Sand erupted, before the flames from the impact turned the whole floor to a new sheet of glass in an instant. But as her halberd retracted to her decent, she touched the crater softly, but...I wasn't there, not anymore. But one thing that was wrong in that little statement of hers.

*Swift's POV*

"W-What?" the Princess sputtered, as me and Loki looked at each other for a moment, before my mouth hung open in terror

"Chris!" I yelled, trying to locate him, but only the Princess stood in the crater, but splats of blacklight dotted the whole hole, even some of the walls

"Holy fuck! She turned him to putty!" Loki screamed in shock, trying to think of a way to rectify the situation. I just stared endlessly, but....I could see it, something wasn't right. Then I looked at Loki, who looked torn between laughing and terror. "Shit-Um...oh Serafin is going to Kiiiill me! Maybe...maybe we can fix this."

"Loki, shut it and look." I muttered, even though something in my head told me that all the choices Ive made today have been risky. Chris' been rubbing off on me, heck, he's practically everywhere! But I smiled all the same, if there was one thing Ive learned from Chris, its that he's the strongest there is. "Things are just getting started."

"Funny, you people seem to think you understand me, I find that amusing." My voice was gravelly, as Celestia tried to move her halberd from the crater, only for my torso to regenerate around it, Luna watched in horror as literal tons of blacklight began to pool into the crater I made, slowly reforming my entire body, my now pissed off face coming back from the glassy-sand, then I raised my upper body a little to face the halberd, before I clenched my right fist. "So do me a favor, take your fucking options and jump up your own ass and die!"

When she tried to reel back, my fist connected with the blade, shattering my fist and the halberd into fragments, but I swung my body off the ground, grabbing the spear-point in my mouth, before I spun round like a superpoered ninja, before the blade buried deep into Celestia's cheek, resulting in her body flying through the air in a spiral, her body fell flat against the wall of the arena, knocking her out cold.

"Sister!" Luna cried, but the crowd was drowning out her plea with both cheers and boos. Then she glared at me, her eyes seeming to glow with pure hatered, but I reacted in kind, as the last threads of blacklight rejoined from under the arena, before my body slowly began to react, the blacklight wrapping tightly around my body like venom

"So....you think you were the scariest thing to walk this rock a thousand years ago?" I asked, my aura glowing a sickening red, along with my eyes. Before my hair slowly began to stand up a little more, fading between black and red as I walked towards the remaining Princess with a grin of a madman

"I'll make you remember your fear."

Now, if I can confirm one thing to be real, it's that rage is universal, even if my whole mind, body and soul is now this bio-hazard, I could still be angry if pushed, and in this case it was all directed at the lunar-donut-bitch. Mind you, this all came from the hypocritical Sun princess who is having a nice taste of pride and rock, but lets be honest, I couldn't give a fuck who I was going to hit next.

When Luna finally uncovered her eyes at the light's retreat, only to watch as her eyes widened and her confidence shrank at my sight. Looking at the glass arena, I saw my blacklight move like a black symbiote around my body, my fingers were sharp, and my body took on a more skeletal form, with black ribs crossing my torso, with the aura of crimson crossing my body like fire. My hair however, was a new shade of red, my eyes matching the scheme of a God.

"So....Luna, how's it feel to be in the presence of a God?" I mused with a more distorted voice, intimidation points, I like it. Luna however kept her guard up, as she gripped her scimitar with both hands, raising it to the side of her face

"I may fear you, creature, but I 'WILL NOT' kneel!" She yelled, but I was gone, atleast to her eyes, but now I was standing behind her, my hands placed in a familiar stance by my waist

"You're gunna beg that you did so sooner." I hissed, before she turned a second too late

BIG BANG KAMEHAMEHA

The crowd watched as their second princess was thrown across the arena in a flash of crimson, as a nova of energy erupted from the crash-zone, leaving behind another crater in its wake, whist almost killing a few spectators who now took the opportunity to move back. When Luna came to again, her armour looked like it was thrown down some stairs, but her scimitar was dust now, she blocked the majority of the blast with it? Impressive, I will say, but....

When I appeared again, her foot spun in reflex, as my own managed to block the swift blow, even with this new form, its power was almost like an endless abyss of energy, but something kept blocking me from using more than ten percent, strange, I'll ask Loki about it later.

I quickly moved to her left, grabbing her head as I smashed her face into the wall beside us.

"I'ma plant me a dumbass tree!" I mocked, before I trailed her face through the rock, before planting her whole head into the sandy arena, causing more to fall through the cracks that surfaced from the pressure I force behind my palm. When I pulled back, she was gone. "You do realize this would be easier if you just kneeled!"

"Bite me!" Gladly. So when I turned to see her fist connect with my jaw, my mouth opened, revealing a maw of jagged teeth, before I bit down on her hand, the bones easily snapping like twigs as she screamed, but she quickly reached for something on my waist, before she pulled back, tearing a finger off in the process

"Not exactly the best phrase to use, but certai-GAH!" Ok, that was pain, real pain. When I looked at my neck, I watched as the darksaber dug through my neck like a hot knife, if the knife was made of plasma. Luna was quick the react to my grunting, as she pulled it out violently, forcing me down, before she drove the darksaber through my chest

She twisted the blade, before she tore it through the left side of my torso, then she spun to my right, avoiding a Ki blast from me, before she grabbed the shoulder and in a swift motion, she tore a chunk of my arm off with the blade. Being resourceful, I quickly activated Stormcaller, then from the sky, a bolt of lightning rained down on us both.

The ground shattered again, but Luna fell backwards, whist my blacklight screamed from the severe burns from both the lightning and plasma, but I was still standing. When the dust settled, Luna was holding her mangled hand, whist she pointed my darksaber in my direction, whist I brushed the leftover plasma from my skin.

"My offer still stands." I spoke calmly, as Luna panted, holding her stance shakily

"I...will never....kneel!" She's gone from persistent to suicidal. Fine by me, lets end this pitiful game with a bang

In a flash I was now hovering above the ring, whist Luna seemed to just stand in wait for my next move.

"Oh nooooo, why's he up there?" The voice of Swift spoke with worry through the mic, then I slammed my hands together, slowly pulling them back to my side

"He-He can't be serious?" Loki muttered, before Swift freaked out

"Getting Chris-Flashbacks!" That's a thing? Ah well, I'm not aiming for them, I'm aiming for Luna....and the Planet's core

"KAAAAAAAAMEEEEEEEE"

"HAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE"

By this point, a hurricane was forming around me, lightning was erupting from every angle of the sky, even the wind was tearing through the sky like a tempest.

KAMEHAME-CERO

"I KNEEL!"

"What?" I asked, the skies turning back to a normal state of peace, as I dusted the blacklight armour off my body, but when I stared down at Luna, she didn't even look at me, but she was trembling in fear

"I surrender, you win..." Luna finally spoke, her mangled hand still dripping with blood, but the other threw the darksaber back to me, to which I grabbed it once more

"HA CALLED IT!" Loki yelled, breaking the tension, as many onlookers just didn't say a word. "What? You think this was going to end differently?"

"Well to be fair, he was pinned a few times!" One random person yelled as Loki nodded in understanding

"Yeah-Yeah, I see your point-but, and hear me out....counter point." What came next was a scream, and then a flash of blue light. "Enjoy hell....'ha'."

"You are by far, the biggest, dumbest idiot in the world!" Swift's ranting soon came into earshot, as Spike followed closely

"Fuck you!" I yelled in a heavy Russian accent. That made her pull her sword on me as she tried to hit me with it. She. Tried. To. Hit. ME! "What are you doing?"

"Hitting you for being an idiot!" She yelled as all it did was make her more cute by the second, so I quickly replied

"Coming from the girl who cried over an immortal guy's body, that threat's very hollow." And like that, she was turning away from me, her sword twitching her hand

"Wait, what'd I miss?" Both Loki and Spike asked as I just pondered on something else entirely

"Wonder what Ruin's doing?"

*Somewhere*

"Oh crap I just lost that bet." Ruin muttered to himself, looking back towards the endless dunes of sand before him, before he shrugged and continued to march through the sand, the sun burning at his skin with every step. "If I see more sand with this next dune I will turn this place to glass."

What he did see was a strange object standing before him, he thought it was another cactus, much like the one stuck to his head, but he just titled his head.

"When did cacti wear clothes?" He pondered, before his own eyes widened at the crimson glare from under the hood. "Oh shit...."

Before he could react, the man had already pointed a 500 magnum to his skull, the silver chamber glowed with a strong scent of Midnite.

"Goodnight, Nightmare."

*BANG*

Author's Note

Well shit just when sideways in the most colossal way possible.

Who would want to see a Ruin side-story following him as he wanders through Equestria?

Chaotic Emotions

"Chris, open the door!?" I yelled for the....well I've been here for an hour. But he still refused the open the door for me, despite the fact he knew I could warp through it thanks to Loki's strange 'Taken Sword'. I groaned again as I tried to explain the situation to him. "Its just a wedding, how bad can it be?"

"Fuck off!" He yelled from the other side of the door. "I can do whatever I please, and right now, I want to do nothing, and I will continue to do nothing until such a time requires me to do something other than nothing."

I just rolled my eyes at this point. To be honest, it didn't bother me as much now, this whole argument would have been more annoying months ago, but now, Chris gave me a better life, fixed my old one, and even gave me something more than 'just a maid'. I actually felt confident in myself again, I wasn't going to let that go, not again.

"Fine....if you act as a guard for their wedding....I'll tell you something. Something I....really should have told you months ago." It was my only option, no doubt Ruin would be here and if things go out of hand, I atleast want Chris to be there, even if he doesn't want to.

"You can stop staring at my door now." I jumped a little at Chris' sudden appearance beside me, his face looking crossed between irritation and boredom. Then he sighed. "Its not just the fact that I have to do this, but timelines have been fucked more than a girl from Fallout: Equestria."

"What?" Once again with his references

"I really need to show you Dragon Ball Z Abridged if we're to ever have a good conversation." Chris muttered, before be turn to walk away. "When's this wedding?"

"Tomorrow. Need to be there for 11:30 am." I explained for him whist I read to the letter, so he just nodded and left me to my own devices. When he left my eye-sight I slumped against the wall, sighing at my stupid decision to reveal my connection to Ruin. "In the words of Chris. Fuck me."

"What am I going to do~?" I asked no one in particular as I walked around my room, my face scrunched up in concentration as I tried to decipher a way out of this mess of mine. But I doubt lasers and Taken minions are going to be much help. "What would 'I' do in this situation. Come on, Swift, think!"

"Don't try too hard, you might hurt yourself."

"GAH!" I yelled as my hand quickly grabbed the hilt of my Void Walker, but I froze at the being sitting on my bed, his tail smoking like it was dunked in magma. "R-Ruin? What happened?"

"Oh you know, just met an old adversary, turns out he's reeeealy strong too." Ruin chuckled darkly, waving his tail back and forth, then it pointed to me. "You've been really naughty, Swifty. Making a deal like that."

"How did-" I then realized it. "-Our minds are linked too, you never said anything about that!"

"I never said it wasn't a possibility, but I guess we learn something new everyday. Now-Now, lets get back to the important reason I'm here. You see, the wedding coming it is going to be a big event, I knowing how Chris blindly listens to you after only a simple deal, its no surprise my plans might go top-side." Ruin explained, before he pointed his finger at me.

"But 'you' will be my ticket. All I need you to do is take Chris to the tallest spire in the castle, I've already set some enchantments to weaken his abilities, and that's it, no other strings attached." Ruin finished with a wave of his arms, but I continued to stare at him intensely, then I spoke

"No." I spoke firmly, my hand carefully gripping the hilt of my blade as he turned to stare back at me, his eyes still wide as usual

"What did you just say, 'cause i swore you said 'No'?" Ruin asked me, but before he could make his move, he watched the blade-tip point dangerously close to his throat, my glare hardened into an icy stare. I was done being his puppet, what could he do to me now? "Well this is unexpected."

"Take your plan. Take your self. And Go. To. Hell." I worded carefully for him. "I'm not your pawn, because you're nothing without me, but I'm something without you."

"Hehehehehahahaha!" He was laughing again, but I didn't move an inch, but he did, as my blade followed him into a standing position. He was even clapping. "I have to admit, seeing that fire in your eyes is certainly new and scary to behold. But you're not a fighter, not yet."

"But you also seem to forget something, Swifty. Nightmares can sense emotions ever well, and from the looks of things, my last visit only seemed to solidify my thought." What did he mean by that? Does he....? "Oh? Did your tiny mind finally think for itself?"

"You..." I was beginning to shake again, but I couldn't help it, I felt like he was snaring me in chains again

"Yep, I was right. The reason for your sudden rebellious nature, your lack of faith in your monarchs, and most importantly, your trust in 'that' acolyte of Loki." Ruin responded with a grin, but before I could react, he kicked the sword from my hand, before his claw reached out and pinned me to the wall, cutting my air-flow. "Don't screw with me, girl!"

"You either do this task for me, or you, your family, your new-found friends, I'll strip them all away before I leave you in the White Dimension itself!" Ruin yelled with a chaotic glare. "Mark my words, Swift Feather. You step out of line again, and I won't hesitate to kill you. I mean, I'll give you some credit, under all that feminine anger, there's a real fighter, somewhere..."

"A-And behind all that u-unbearable ego is a dead m-man!" I choked up, trying to saver my breath as dots appeared in my vision. But the last thing I saw before I fell unconscious was his sharp grin and emerald eyes, the anger and lust for bloodshed was leaking off them both

"Girl. You couldn't fathom the amount of dead men behind me."

*Chris' POV*

"Soooooo....you gunna talk?" I drawled in my own fit of boredom, watching mountains turn into bigger mountains had grown tiresome and I was limited in my abilities of entertainment. No fun to be had, so I guess chatting would suffice. Now looking at me from my response, Swift had an aura of uneasiness, sure, I was creepy, but she was used to that, but this was different. "You seem....not normal, please explain?"

"Huh-what, no i'm fine, I just have...alot of concerns as of late." Swift lied, but I played along as she looked towards the slowly growing city. "Like I said before, the whole reason you're here is for protection, especially if....Ruin appears, but also something else."

"Go on..." I motioned, but my mind had already guessed what, due to the timing of events changing, it didn't mean the outcomes were different, so, Changelings

"Changelings-" Called it. "-Had been growing more deadly since the badlands' biggest contender....the 'Caribou'? Their camps littered the sands, but someone has recently cleared the last of them, most being from what remained of the capital. Due to this, the queen decided to expand her army, and the Princesses fear they could endanger the wedding."

"So I'm here to kill if things get more than decent?" One nod from her was proof enough, but I then rolled my eyes. "I don't understand something about this whole situtation, so explain this to me?"

"What is it?" Swift blinked, almost like a subtle tint of fear dropped on her, but I continued, pointing at her directly

"Why weren't you assigned to do the same? You have power to do your own protecting, since royal guards tend to be very fucking useless in every source of media I know, or they are there for plot convenience. So why not you or my comic brother, Spike?" I asked simply, though Spike was understandable, Swift wasn't, and it bothers me to see wasted power go to the sidelines over certain roles

"I guess....its due to my background. When you think about it, I'm still contracted under my previous job, despite my improvements, it doesn't make me anymore than a maid. Which seams pointless, considering the amount of walls you break." Swift both explained and insulted my way of entry

"Then fucking quit." I bluntly stated, not needing any explanation. "We have other maids....I mean, ones a Changeling-but that's besides the point!"

"Huh. I...never thought about that, I guess with everything going on I never-wait, one of them is a Changeling?" Swift finally caught on to what I said, then she groaned. "Are you kidding me?"

"No, because that is an emotion I lack." I responded, before I watched the sword embed itself beside my head. "Point taken."

Is if funny that I know half of the guards are changelings? No? Ok then. When I noticed the eyes of every guard on me and Swift, a whole wave of uneasiness, fear, and I think I smelt something weird. That's when something caught my attention, more importantly, what I could see 200 yards ahead of me.

"Cadence....Cadance? Which fucking way is it-nevermind. Queen Cry-Cyrs-Queen....Mephiles." I worded to myself, even with Swift looking at me like I completely lost my sanity, but we were already in-front of both her, and Shining.....Armour. I tried not to laugh. "Oh Loki....the fucking puns...."

"What?" Said joke replied, before Swift kicked my shin and spoke for me

"Nothing! It's a pleasure to finally make your acquaintance, Captain Armour, Princess Cadence." Swift bowed

"Isn't the Empire after the wedding...?" I continued to ponder out-loud, but no one heard me, again

"I heard of you too, Swift Feather. You helped a few refugees in the Badlands near Dodge, some of which are my men, so you have my respect." Armour bowed in his own turn, making Swift turn red from embarrassment. Before she could thank him Chris opened his mouth and unsurprisingly ruined the mood.

"You're marrying a bug, that's hilarious." I stated out of the blue while chuckling at the ridiculous concept, what I didn't realize, was that I said it out-loud

"What?"

"Did you?"

"SAY!?" Swift yelled at me, her eyes glaring daggers at me whist flying in front of me. Then she grabbed my head, shaking it like a rabid child. "Are you trying to start a war?" She whispered-screamed at me

"Well...no, just stating how she's giving off magic that is clearly not normal, even for a human, if she was one." I shrugged, before pointing to her. "When Swifty is done strangling me, I'm going to eat you."

"I-Love, I have no clue what this....monster is saying." Even when she pulled him away to whisper something, I could still hear it, even over Swift shaking my skull. "I think Ruin was right about not trusting ourselves around him."

"And if what rumors ive heard, attacking him may cause more trouble for both the Empire and Canterlot than we wish." Armour murmured, but that was brought to a close, due to a Taken Timberwolf dragging my body down the next hall, along with Swift

"Oh come on, its not my fault you're kind is dense!" I ranted, shoving the wolf off my leg, before I pealed Swift off my neck. "What? I could have killed her, saved us alot of unnecessary chapters, and gone to bed?"

"The 'problem', is that I can sense it too, that magic wasn't human, and from how Shining Armour reacted, I think she's hexed him, if i'm right, than we'll just cause more chaos than intended." Swift pointed out, whist we continued to walk down the halls of the fortress

"Well, since I have zero tolerance for bullshit, what's the plan?" I decided to play along for the time being, knowing she had more patience than I did

"I....have an idea. There's a tower near the back of the castle....its the tallest tower, being th observation wing, it has lookout points spanning across the whole kingdom." Good plan....but something was off, she was lying...or she was getting rid of me. "Maybe you'll quit trying to kill people too..."

"Hey! guns don't kill people, bullets do!" Then I fired a round from Jackel, watching as the bullet ricochet off every vase in the hallway, before shattering a large, stain-glass window of Luna's moon, leaving a hole through the moon. Swift's jaw was ajar, her eye now twitching. "Well...its accurate now."

So....many....stairs. When we 'finally' arrived at the top of the observatory, Swift was lying on my back, whist I crawled up the last steps on my hands and knees, my feet bleeding as I dropped at the last step. When we arrived, I shoved the door open, and Swift fell to my side, whist I cried.

"I...could have....flown." Grabbing my hindsight and kicking it in the teeth, I moved to my feet and noticed how papers, books, and a shit ton of old candles laid wasted on the floor. Observation of observatory indicates a lab or research room of some-kind. "Now then....where to start?"

"Right here." Oh mother fu-

Before I had a chance to say anything, the door slammed shut behind me and Swift, whist I blinked at the sudden appearance of the Nightmare. Ruin grinned wickedly, whist my eye traveled to my right, before it landed on a thread of blacklight strangling the last lacrima in the room, nullifying the whole trap Ruin set, though Swift was somehow involved, gunna need to talk about that later.

"I'm so glad you could make it! Ive been waiting hours for you to arrive, though, not without company." He then pointed to Swift, said girl hiding behind me as his grin widened. "Now then, I believe I said something about you either leaving or you die, now I don't think my words were unheard, due to your enheightened hearing, correct?"

"But enough with the details, letting you live when we first met was 'my' mistake, to which I plan to correct now." Ruin then moved closer to me and Swift, whist I stood motionless at his cocky attitude. "This whole room was hexed, you've probably noticed, due to your power dropping since you entered the runes effect range?"

"Now with you more or less as weak as a human. First, I'm going to kick you like a orphaned child. Second, I'll breakdown your atoms to the point that your blacklight dies out one-by-one. Last, I'll make everyone watch at I-"

*SMASH*

Ruin's body flew faster than his words to my left, as his body flew through the wall from my backhand, leaving a Ruin shaped hole in the wall, whist I titled my head to see his body fly through several towers and through the mountain. Only his screams were heard from this distance.

. . . .

. . . .

. . . .

. . . .

"Did you mother fucking bitch-slap me!?"

Good And Evil Means Nothing

"I think you made him mad." Observation goes to Swift, though that was a clear image due to the amount of condensed magic gathering where Ruin landed, if anything, he was preparing to go all in on me and that could spell disaster if I were to play this foolishly again. I had a single, more than mangled, life left. I also had backup.

"Depends, does he usually replicate a shit-ton of weaponry-which are currently heading this way?" I asked in return, seeing the hundred or so weapons flying in our direction, but before I could lift a finger to rid them from my issues, I watched as a pack of timber wolves took the brunt of the hits, their bodies black and gooey, eyes sunken and white too

I glanced over at Swift, holding Void Edge in her hands, whist she smiled coyly.

"See, I can help too." She mused, before I grabbed her leg and threw her behind me, whist the ground where she stood melted and snapped at the cursed flames which easily consumed the Taken Wolves with ease, leaving me to stare at Swift's disappointed face. "Just once....let me win...."

"The adults are talking, brat! So stay out of this!" Ruin snapped, kicking my gutless gut through the door and back down the flight of stairs as I continued to roll, my pride dripping down every step of agony. "I've waited so long to do this...."

"A bit of a delay on your part." I muttered under my rolling body, before I saw the emerald eyes watch my tumbling with glee. But I still had to ask one simple thing. "You had every opportunity to kill me, or attempt it, so why only start now? I'm far more powerful than the last time, so it seems a little wasted?"

"'Wasted'? No-no-no-no. You think you've the only one who worked their way to the top of the board from nothing? You though, you are nothing, you deserve nothing, you....are NOTHING!" Ruin snarled, before I was pulled through the spiral-stairs and through the wall into a hallway, the bricks clattering upon me as I moved off the carpet

"Someone's upset?" I added, not wanting to be dragged through another wall, since Ruin stood a few feet away from me, his talon tapping against the marble floor with irritation. But I could tell he was waiting for me to focus again, this was his final move I guess

"You have been the biggest pain in the soul to me since day one. Albatross is something else too, but right now, I just have one last offer for you." Ruin summed up his life story, but I was listening nonetheless. "Quit doing this world, and Loki the favor of aiding it, and I'll simply let you leave, clearly you hate this place, given the fact you smeared the faces of their Monarchs across the battlefield with ease, so why waste time here?"

"Better than that, I can get Loki off your back, by the time he notices your....disappearance, you'll be nothing but a ghost in the wind." Ruin emphasized his point with a wave of his hand, and to be fair, the offer is tempting, all gaps were sealed in this, hardly any twisted wording, and Loki is kind-of a dick. However....

"Why would we trust anything you say, you've tried to kill him before!?" Didn't even need to speak, Swift did it for me, seeing her stand beside me for once with a glare, now, I'm no psychiatrist, I failed horribly at it, but she's really pissed with Ruin, and in a, 'I know you know' way. "You're a pathological liar."

"Guilty as charged. But I'm serious, with my help, you'll be a distant memory of Loki, almost....adrift in an endless nothingness that even he can't detect." Ruin spoke, his left hand glowing a sickly green, as the embers dripped like venom to the carpet, question, how come not a single guard has shown themselves yet? Just me? Ok. "What do you say, buddy, feel like vanishing?"

"Yeah....how about...." I was really finding this offer tempting, but Loki did bring up a valid point, if not a very simple one at that

"-Nightmares are creatures of destruction, they all love violence to a degree and are more than willing to do anything to get what they want."

"-Me and Swifty here don't just kill you...." I trailed off, seeing his eye twitch with his claws, whist Swift seemed to grasp Void Edge closer to her chest. "But violently maim your sorry ass like a fish-stick?"

"Hmm....how about...." Ruin pondered, tapping a claw to his chin with narrowed eyes, before he melted, quite horrid might I add, into the ground like a puddle, before I turned sharply to my left between me and Swift. "No."

Ruin was far faster than I had anticipated, as his tail lunged at my stomach, slicing my chest, whist placing the force of a train behind the strike, knocking me backwards across the floor, whist his flaming left fist connected with the flat face of Swift's Void Edge, the shockwave rattling the air, as the floor beneath them shattered like glass, with Swift being forced to her knee under the pressure of his ignited fist.

"Such a shame, I really liked you." Ruin grumbled, before something wrapped around his arm, pulling it away, and towards the now glaring head of a Hydra, its sunken, white eyes narrowing under its slimy body, as the tongue dragged him closer to the crooked, serrated teeth, only for Ruin to simply swipe his tail back, slicing the head of the Taken Hydra in two, before he spun in the air, kicking the remains of the single head aside. "But this tune has gotten dry, and rather repetitive."

Facing me again, his body dashed in a blink of shadows, before he grabbed my shirt, pulling me to my feet, before his claws extended, piercing my skull like an apple, before he threw me into the wall, his foot striking my stomach again, shattering the wall behind me, then he kicked me again with much more ferocity, causing the wall behind my spine to collapse, throwing me through the bricks with ease. Then I warped behind him myself, striking the side of his face with a fist, but....I was actually startled to see him blocking the force with a single finger, then he looked over his shoulder with a mad smile.

"Bye now." Ruin put simply, flicking his finger against my knuckle, turning my arm's bones to dust, whist throwing me backwards into a spiral down the hall. Then I turned, blocking his fist with my concealed xenomorph tail, striking him, and slicing his fingers off his palm, before I bounced back off the floor, and threw a right cross into his side, followed by a left uppercut to the jaw, throwing him into the ceiling above us

Ruin only seemed to melt into the shadows again, appearing behind Swift, as she flew forwards, avoiding his grab, as the Taken rift broke between them, releasing another pack of Taken Wolves before Ruin, who only kicked one back through the rift, before he grabbed one by the neck, and used it as a stick to break the others to his left and right like a baton, before he dropped the remains of the Taken Wolf, and flattened its skull under his foot, his talons digging into the Corrupted wood.

I was finally given a chance to attack, seeing as he was trying to knock Swift from the sky, so I vanished again, appearing just behind him, but his left arm reached around to grab me again, only for me to twisting his shoulder in my fist, snapping the bone under the pressure, as his right knee flew around, breaking my ribs, before he threw a gut punch from his right fist, so I grabbed it, pulling him closer, as I threw my right fist across his smug face, throwing him back slightly.

He only seemed to twitch under the strain, before propelling himself towards me, his left fist clenched, so I did the only logical thing, I threw my face into the connecting blow, the impact absorbing into my muscles, as the bones within Ruin's fist seemed to shake and recoil from the unbreakable force, as he winced, pulling his arm back.

"N...no...!" Ruin was startled, perfect for me, as I moved closer to him, my right hand connecting with his face, throwing him backwards, before he grunted, a purple streak of void energy digging into his back from Swift, as she spun around, bringing the blade down in a horizontal arc. Ruin grabbed her wrist then twisting, making her grip loosen on Void Edge, before he grabbed her face, throwing her across the floor, before she struck the wall harshly, knocking the wind out of her, so I moved closer

Ruin reacted though, ducking with his left leg held up behind him, then he spun on his heel, swiping at my legs with his leg, but I leapt over him, so he grabbed my right leg, before throwing me into the wall, before he flew upwards, pulling me with him, before he spun in the air, and threw me into the floor, shattering the tiles even further, and most of my shoulder blades, spinal cord, and pelvis for a few short seconds of pain. Then that was replaced with Ruin's feet impaling my chest, snapping my ribs, and puncturing my heart and lungs, as I coughed up black blood, as he pressed further to look at me with a grin.

"I was going to be a simple guy and kill you quickly, given the fact you are the greatest challenge ive had in years, but now....now all I feel is robbed." Ruin frowned, moving to kick me onto my stomach, as I felt the magic pressure build into his body again. Shit, I'm kind-of having some deja vu from the last time, damn, I think he may have placed more of those nullifies again....not good, would explain my decreased strength. "So long, Chris...."

"What the...hell are you doing!?" Ok...didn't really expect Swift to be still coherent, but hey, miracles in death. "You have more power than most people across this world, you fought off impossible odds before, so what's stopping you now!? For Celestia's sake, get the fuck up!"

"Well....that was touching." Ruin mocked empathy, whist my arm slowly inched closer to my face, as I moved my sleeve slightly under his foot atop my back, slowly grinding my spine, and organs like paste, as I spat more black blood out under the pressure, then, I saw him lean down. "Swift, say goodbye to your last hope of ever being someone significant....any last words, Chris?"

"I....AM THE MACHINE!!!" I barked up, seeing his face twist round, only for my arm to completely smack him across the cheek, imprinting the grey and orange Versatrix symbol across his face, the dial slamming down against the watch, it may only last a second, but this might just work. Within that time-frame, a flash of hot-orange blinded us, as my arm converted under the light of the Versatrix, as my arm completely took on the form of Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann's arm, spiting the ceiling above wide open, atomizing the roof in a single thrust of my arm, splitting the clouds, and grazing the side of the Donut Moon, looking now like it had a bite taken out of its side, with some stars flashing in the Twilight sky, indicating at where Ruin had ended up

With that flash of orange, I breathed heavily under the strain, seeing my arm back to normal, whist the rubble of the castle rained from the roof's edges, leaving me and Swift to relax under the silence of the aftermath, seeing Ruin was nowhere to be seen. For once, I felt rather glad to be still not dead, or unalive as it were.

"Is everyone alright!?" At the sudden male voice, our heads turned to see....Armour approaching us, a group of Guards accompanying him, all armed with spears, and shields, with Princess Celestia following too with a worried expression. Then, all eyes fell on me, as I coughed up more black blood over the blacklight rebuilding my bones, and organs again. "So....this was all you?"

"Oh go fuck a cactus." I commented, moving slowly to my feet to look at the damage caused. "I was used to cause this, but yeah I did some redecorating with both my face, and Ruin's spine."

"Its true-ow!" Swift winced, holding her left arm at the blood, as she walked up to me with a reassured smile. "This wasn't our fault, it was Ruin, he ambushed us, trying to kill Chris."

"I may not agree with Chris' methods, but this seems to be a foolish attempt on any person's part in attack him." Well, seems Celestia is of the understanding type, I can accept that, then she looked me in the eye. "Was this the Ruin, Loki talked of?"

"The one....and only, you swine!" A gnarled, mangled voice sieved behind me and the Guards, as Swift quickly moved to hold my left side up, huh, didn't realize my body was still weaker

"Thank you, Swifty." I nodded, before we turned out gazes to Ruin, seeing us with a twitching eye. His body was dripping with melted flesh, as some floated in the air like a parasite, sticking back together like ink, whist his eyes were pulled, torn like claws through his face, as his frown hung open with blackened teeth, whist his both smoked with the smell of burnt flesh, hair, and skin. "Shiiiit."

"Seeing you two like this makes my melted flesh itch with pain, your disgusting presence is enough to make this unyielding rage boil in me....!" He growled, his hand both glowing a sickly green once more, as his eyes narrowed permanently at us, whist bones protruded from his shoulders, with some beginning to aligning his arms, he was evolving, not a good sign at all. "I've had it, no more holding back, no Loki, no Princesses, and certainly no Albatross is going to stop me!"

"You mad bro?" I muttered, seeing his rage break completely, so I tugged at Swift's shirt, getting her to stare at me with pink eyes. "Back off, this won't end well for all of us otherwise."

"Chris...." I don't have time for this bullshit, not right now-am I....actually giving a damn about her? Did she somehow matter? Huh, not important right now. "I'll find the lacrima causing the nullification, just hold on, ok?"

I was actually caught off guard by that, seeing her switch gears, before flying off into the tower's staircase again, leaving me to deal with the background characters in my way behind me, whist the flames crackled around Ruin. Guess I have no choice now, not that I could care less, spilling his guts was my plan from the beginning. Might as well leave my fate in the hands of girl who could fly.

"Now then....lets see....how much power you have left, Chris, to stop THIS!"

I fucking hate weddings.

Author's Note

Back from the dead, bitches! Enjoy this one, since I doubt Lucaridis will be bothered to write for a while, I'll try, but hope this to your liking, peace!

Sincerely, Slendy

Yup, why write your own story when you have good natured slaves to do it for you. I'd say thanks but we both know I wouldn't mean it.

Downfall

How would I begin to describe all that this situation? Probably something along the lines of 'Son' meets 'Bitch'. I wake up, if sleep is even a necessity of mine anymore, was annoyed by Swifty to join her on a small excursion to a wedding gone mad, with most being replaced by Changelings, meaning once I have my next problem was taken care of I'll be ending this redundant episode faster than what I would deem 'fun'. Where was I again? Oh right, a Wedding turned blood bath, mostly consisting of my own hybrid blood, against an egotistical Nightmare hell-bent on my own end, to which I am neither intimidated or impressed.

"If it weren't for my own crutch to stay alive, you'd be worth the effort in bond with. A man - no, a thing with no master, wielding an untold number of powers, combined with a Nightmare, we'd be something more." Ruin clasped his hand with a grin as if the concept of fusing with him sounded pleasant, well it did, I just have enough problems with the concept of understanding how someone so...annoying was causing me so much trouble. "I know you won't listen-"

"Really?" I raised my voice dryly, my hand clasped behind my back for my fingers to begin cycling the Versatrix on my wrist, here's hoping Loki gave me something to work with. "Now, I believe we've both heard enough speeches of 'Power' this and 'Take over the world' that, can we fight now?"

His crooked smile only made my eyes slowly narrow, he was planning something and I last that happened I nearly hit the metaphorical deck, and with Swift, much as I hate to say it, gone to fix that 'trap' of Ruin's, I had no-one to cover my ass, and like hell I'd have this hybridized ass of mine be protected my Armour of all people.

"As I said, let's see...how much power you have left to stop this." Ruin was gone, moving himself to float near the ceiling and that sudden pressure and noticeable lack of magic around me began to siphon towards himself, the streams of ether and dark matter were beginning to extinguish crystals and drain the color of some segments of the ruined hallway, impressive, he could drain magic too. "I summon forth that which is condemned, bring forth thy wrath under thou name, Amducious The Demon of Destruction!"

Despite the fact I could have easily avoided this, I'd rather not open pandora's box, so I sat still and braced for the onslaught of etheral dark matter, upon seeing the light bend towards a growing, purple and white light, the pressure that began to pull at my soul made my body brace itself for the resulting amalgamation of power, in mere seconds a massive sphere of concentrated ether and dark matter was thrown towards me, even just one source of the energy was monumental in pressure, but both at the same time, I didn't get a single noticeable point to fly away, as he lurched forwards, the radius of the light consuming me, and my entire mass screamed in pain.

The very DNA of blacklight was going to be burned straight off my body if I didn't act quickly, the force behind this wasn't like last time, he was using my shtick of holding back, combined with that annoying trap giving me a headache, I can't keep stalling like this. I needed to move, It was hard, but I shakily brought my outstretched arms closer to me, digging them through the mass of energy and back to my chest, where I heavily threw them around, my palms facing me.

This wasn't normal, given how overpowered I've become you'd think this would be a cakewalk, but sure, I had to play the nice guy and try saving idiots who can't seem to handle their own problems, and when my own arise I'm forced to 'help' them. Maybe letting myself be atomized would be a mercy, Loki knows this is pointless if I can't cause mass genocide to stop a single, fucking, Nightmare.

"You do realize, that one of these boxes may very well melt your face off." I reminded, but he shrugged

"Well....that does sound bad, but it also sounds cool!"

"Can-Can you at the very least promise to try and take care of yourself?"

...If I live through this, I'm going to find a way to understand how I'm so stupid, no matter how obvious the answer may be. Pushing back on the spiced energies, I noted how the ground had become far more...drained of color like the literal magic was completely drained from the source? Fascinating. Finally, I was able to push the large blast back far enough to disperse the blast across the hall, the magic slicing the walls but other than that the entirety of the building was intact, yet my hands were burned so black the difference between third-degree burns and blacklight was hard to distinguish.

Pushing back up with my legs I pushed through the fading embers of ether towards the ground, burrowing into the tile and soil beneath, pushing through the ground and out below Ruin, my arms planted firmly against the ground and with enough force to break my bones, I was flung towards the Nightmare, who only noticed as my fist was driven through, the lower jaw snapping and molding around my knuckle and through his melted mouth.

I went for another left hook, yet only smoke made contact with me, and I turned to have a dark shin snap my arm in two by the elbow, but the bend of my arm allowed my head to slam the dial of the Versatrix down, and a flash of orange blinded us both, and my lower body and the majority of my bone structure morphed and molded into three large pieces of bone matter. The instant the flash dialed down, Ruin was met with a massive, skeletal backhand, driving his body through the side of the left wall and through the ground.

"Skeletron!" Looking at my massive floating arms and noting that I only had a massive skull for a head I dropped my arms lower in an invisible shrug. "No ribcage, just arms, and a skull, seriously?"

I wasn't going to be picky now, lurching my right and left arms back, I swung them towards Ruin, the Nightmare standing up to deflect the left arm up and over the right, but my I instinctively reached out to grab ahold of him, yet he merely side-stepped and punched the arm through the side of the wall, while merely dusting himself off. My left arm came back around to throw a club his way, raising his arms, the fist made contact and Ruin was sent skidding back, yet his left arm raised to fire a bombardment of smaller ether blasts.

In another flash of rich orange, I reverted back, dropping to the side of the all and running across the cracked surface of the highly damaged wall, moving to avoid being struck by the negative waves Ruin propelled towards me, while I drew Cassul and Jackel and shot the closer blasts from my point of view, while some holy rounds pierced through Ruin's chest and limbs, yet he stood unfazed, merely mocking me with a grin.

Pushing off the surface I flipped over a few more spheres drawing my breath back into my lungs, and the slow sound of an old clock filled my conscious mind.

"Tiil Klo Ul!" The roar of time deceleration, the area of effect consumed Ruin, and I watched as rubble slowed in the air, waves of negative novas slowly expanded, Ruin was all but morphing his facial features chipped away from a grin to confusion. Still hanging in the air, I placed my hands together with my index and middle finger against my palm. "kage bunshin no jutsu!"

The second five more of me appeared and even that small act had put a serious strain of my vision, I felt sweat beginning to form where it shouldn't, and I was only going to make it work. In order from what I could see through the orange flames that consumed my entire body once more, I released a Blade Barrage atop Ruin's slowed form, followed by a Hammer of a Sunbreaker, a Nova Bomb, a Chaos Beam, a Fist of Havoc, and Spectral Blades, the amalgamation of Void, Solar and Arc turned the entirety of Ruin into a smoldering kaleidoscope.

The clones all turned to smoke as I landed where Ruin was, the only thing left of where he consisted of a shadow with an eternal scream and wave of hands burnt into the tiles, his shadow had been completely burnt into the stone, and I stepped down on his face so I could finally breathe, the first time I have been glad a fight was over, both a disappointment and relief.

"And that is why I hate weddings." I drawled to the awe-struck crowd, while some guards regained the intelligence to begin searching for any sign of other intruders or Ruin, the latter would probably kill them since his soul isn't here, meaning he's still alive...great. "Sunbutt, still want to rant in my ear, now's your chance?"

"I...don't believe that will be necessary, Chris." Good, I wouldn't have listened anyway, one of my ears was burned off. "You don't seem to be looking well?"

"That would be the obvious outcome, yes." Why reply sarcastically now, it didn't really matter. "If anyone needs a problem solved, go ask someone who isn't me and we'll be fine."

"Oh, Chris, if I weren't tied to that annoying little girl I'd would love to use you to my ends..." Ruin chuckled, raising his right arm before him, a blacken bow taking shape from broken glass, while a string was pulled back in his left, holding onto a highly unstable arrow, white and black light crackling across its surface. "Guess your death will be just as...satifactory."

He released it.

Loki dammit. I moved my legs again to stumble towards the line of which something extremely powerful was aimed for, the crowd of people, of course, being the persistent man I am, I stopped before them and where I saw a thin, purple arrow fly forth from the shadows, it didn't break the sound barrier, nor did it feel anywhere near as strong as Ruin's last attempts...actually, I almost couldn't tell how strong it was?

*Thunk-Slice*

The arrow stuck my chest directly, the entirety of its mass dissolving into dust around me, other than that, I waited for the new hole in my chest to...close...up? Okay, why wasn't it closing? I mean, I felt that lacrima give out during the Super attack...okay...starting to feel...not okay, huh. Falling down to a knee, I grazed my hand across my chest and I only pulled back to see...blood and purple specks were thrown into the mix.

"Chris I got it - what the?" Seems timing is on point, turning my head to Swift, then back to my hand I let out a small laugh

"I am slightly afraid right now." Black spots and darkness took over, and my mind suddenly fell into nothingness

Author's Note

We're back, and despite the shorter word count, I believe this will suffice. I mean, nothing like kicking an overpowered character in the balls to get one's writing going.

Slendy.

Who remembers this story, not me, that's who.

Forget You're Part Vegeta and Don't Fuck Up

One couldn't begin to describe the feeling I had, this....bleak, voidless existence, I....was dead, but my mind, coiled among the icy fingers of life, I couldn't breathe, at least I couldn't tell if I was. Am I asleep? I couldn't be paralyzed....and yet my world soon trickled life into my being, starting with my touch. Everything was on fire. My body, my Blacklight, every atom of my being was burning, then healed, then burned again. Either Sunbutt finally decided to off me or the world wants to be rid of me, I am a parasite after all.

"You are by far the worst creature to have been spawned by humankind." Since when did my thoughts agree with me? And were female? Oh wait, my eyes are still closed, let's fixed that

Lifting a finger to my eyelids I sliced the index finger across my sealed eyelids, and my vision cleared again, the Blacklight reconfiguring my working eyelids to act as they should again. I was alive again, this was the third time I've died, once of natural means the other two by Ruin. I was sitting in the same bed as the time I wasted in this castle, huh, I actually remembered that despite how irrelevant it was.

"So, you are alive." Oh right, someone was talking to...me? It was that bitch again...uhh, fuck what was her name? She was with Loki last time, gave me annoying fire powers too and yet I can't use fire without messing myself up even more than I have

"I am, that much is clear." A dry stare to a dry response. "...Hello?"

"..." No response, only that creepy stare, no pupils made it more creepy to look at. "How many times have you done this?"

"What, said 'hello', a lot more times than I actually remember." Still, nothing, not even an irritated sigh, what was she that emotionless? Wait, why would I care, I have no emotions?

"Since you seem the be the only person here, mind answering me the question of how I was nearly shafted?" My question was important, not why she was here

"You were struck by an unstable spell, infusing ether and dark matter into a condensed form, if shot through the soul of any living being it would fracture their soul, leaving them to fall apart mentally, before they are merely a mindless thrall." Well, that's dark, but shit that was close, I actually felt my body die from that too. "You are lucky to be alive."

I am alive? No I'm not, I mean I am but not with Blacklight running through me. But does that mean I'm dead? I'm a virus so...okay, deep questions that's not natural in the slightest.

"You feel that? Your own soul is starting to contradict itself. You doubt things you don't usually do, you remember things that meant nothing yet something at the same time." Serafin! That was her name, I also had no clue what she was going on about. "What I was asking is how many times you've put your life through torment, accomplishing only selfish ideals and chaos with every end game. To simply put, how many times have you been worse than Ruin?"

"...If that's supposed to make me feel guilty, then you're wasting your time." Have I actually killed more in Equestria than Ruin? Maybe, I did erase a kingdom before - Ok, stop doing that, it's distracting. "Okay...Serafin, why am I constantly contradicting my own thoughts?"

"Your soul is splitting." That sounds...bad. "You have gained power equal to Gods, but that 'Blacklight', it is only a thing that wishes to perfect and consume, you are a being of reason, choice, knowledge, you have free will, it does not understand that concept, so it is trying to remove it."

Moving to sit against the board of the bed I stared directing back at this Goddess with a slightly increased amount of interest in what my own body was doing to itself.

"Wait, so the Blacklight wants to remove...me?" Does that make any sense? Probably? Maybe? No? Ugh, this is getting annoying! "And you're here to tell me this and not Loki why...?"

"Loki...he has no time to waste on an idea gone wrong." Serafin had done what I think many have failed to do, they made me feel something gloomy...hopeless, so that's what 'weight on your shoulders' means. "He said that if you could not realize your own mistakes then there's no point in trying so hard to make it right."

"So, he left me to my own devices?" How was that - she was about to shoot me down again

"You have only one option." Dramatic pause much? "You need to rid yourself of Blacklight."

...

...

Oh.

"That's..." Get rid of Blacklight. Why would I do that? I should do that? No, getting rid of immortality is stupid. So is dying again. No - Okay, this was frustrating! "..."

Serafin merely stood up again, sighing as her arms laid crossed tightly to her chest, but she didn't look angry, frustrated, I swore she gave me a look not many would give me nor would I care in return, if I could care in a mindless form of Blacklight, the same power I've used to grow stronger than most would consider overpowered, that same, single wish I asked for from Loki. This power was far too real and it was going to consume me. Serafin stood above me, and slowly, her hand rested on my shoulder, I did feel the Blacklight attempt to take her DNA, replicate and evolve, but nothing occurred, only the black tendrils smoldering at the soft grasp on my shoulder.

"Loki left you with one chance, you can either let this go or, you can be left alone, forever." Simply put, I had no retort or remark. She was right, and I was wrong. "You can choose you to exchange the Blacklight for a lesser power, but that's up to you."

To my curious stare, she procured a white mask from her belt, holding it out to me in full view. A white mask with crimson lines painted across the left side, sharp teeth too. I see a Hollow Mask. Grabbing it I felt the cold surface of it as I flipped it around. With a final look to this Goddess, she merely kept a neutral expression towards me.

"I suggest you take a moment to decide, but whatever you chose it could be the last choice you make or the first step in the right direction." With that, I saw her body begin to turn to nothingness, but I did have something to say, might be the first time I have a question

"Why did you help me? You have no obligation to do so." I wouldn't piss on myself if I was on fire. Would I? No. Yes. Shut up thoughts!

"You bare the mark of my own paladins under Loki's request, therefore I will always make time to guide my followers, even if they are lost to my order." Then she gave me a small smile. "Even if they are a pain to handle."

"Up yours too." With that, she was gone, and I was left with contradicting thoughts and not much time to handle that Changeling Queen, whatever her name was, I don't remember, do I? Ugh...this is a migraine. "Okay, Queen...Mephiles, fuck it, Mephiles, time to throw strategy out the window."

I had two options, one of which was logical and the other stupid. I was on the clock with my own mind slowly turning into a mass of inconsistent thoughts and feelings. And I'm alone in this, no-one to blame but myself if shit hit the fan. Ruin is also a factor. I also survived dying by an ether-infused arrow and I'm about to go fight a Queen straight after, Swift is going to kill me, bring me back and kill me again.

I fucking hate weddings.

Author's Note

Oh look, an update made in record time, given how much I write including Lucaridis, this should keep consistent for a while. Chapters will be short, but not pointless. Hope this was interesting to read.

Slendy

Is Chris a xenophile, maybe?

Pop Goes The Changeling

(Chrysalis' POV)

"My Queen, your drones have successfully infiltrated the Royal Guard, only a select few remain, including that girl and dragon you wanted us to keep an eye on." My most loyal warrior, Phorid. My plans were finally nearing their completion, and the aid of that...Nightmare was certainly unexpected, while I'd prefer not putting my drones under his command, that monster is not to be trifled with if he promised me this kingdom for resources so be it

"Good, but continue your watch on that dragon and the maid, they have been around that creature Ruin is after, so be wary." I stomped firmly to emphasize my point, without a word he bowed, shifting back into his hidden form to proceed with the next step. I, however, found this to be amusing

"You seem awfully happy?" If I had a heart I swore it has stopped under the voice of Ruin. With a stern glare, I turned to face the Nightmare who looked to be worse than before, I could smell the burnt flesh from here. "From a woman who has yet to fully defeat her enemies you have an awful lot of confidence."

"I - well, with the way everything has progressed, and the death of Chris, I would say everything is within our grasp." My calm smile was only shot down by the cackling of this Nightmare, he stared down at me with a sinister grin, his eyes narrowed mere inches from my face

"I wouldn't count Swifty and the Dragon out yet. They are very good at what they do, even I am not ashamed to admit that." He pressed his finger to my chin, tilting my head up to look at him directly, his snake-like tongue licking his teeth. "The last thing we need to do is let a single, honest soul get through and throw a monkey wrench in my dodgeball court. You mess up and I'll let them slaughter your whole putrid race."

I suddenly felt my feet lift off the ground, his hand grasped my jaw tightly enough to force my chin to crack, forcing a wince from my throat, but I stared in horror at the sight of this being's true colors, the look of death in his eyes was enough to make even mountain shake at the sight.

"You so much as harm Swift though, I will see no reason as to not leave you all burning under my feet, as I strip the very souls from your hollow frames!" With a violent toss, I felt my feet stumble back onto the ground, my hand against my chin softly. With a smile, he turned back around. "Now, if you have nothing better to say I have an Empire to prepare for plan B."

In an instant he was gone again, leaving me to continue looking through my drones' eyes. One particular pair caught my fury though.

"Hey." Spoke the man in blue armor

"Hey." The one in gold answered back

"You ever wonder why we're here?"

"That's one of life's - hold on, totally random question, but do you hear something?" The gold guard pointed to the door they sat against, his ear to the wood

"What? We're the only others here, what else could..." He stopped when he too heard what sounded like heavy footsteps, followed by a guy shouting

"GOD DAMMIT, I CAN'T THINK STRAIGHT!"

"Who's-"

The sudden force of the wood splintering across the hallway was loud enough to alert the entire sector of the castle. The gold-armored Changeling's magic had failed, revealing its black form, not strung up on several spikes that shot forth from the door, piercing his chest and throat, green blood leaking down the tendrils as a man stepped through, not noticing the Changeling in blue armor beneath him.

"What did you-" His head was promptly smashed under the boot of Chris, his foot nearly slipping on the grey matter that stained the carpet, staining his shoe a bright green for a moment, the Blacklight consuming the DNA again

(Chrysalis' POV)

I felt my own insides turn at the sight. "W-What!? How is he alive!?" With a growl and a new-found hatred towards this vile monster, I felt the emerald magic seep across my body. "My Drones, head for the stairwell to the east, I want that putrid monster lying in a pool of his own blood now!"

I felt my eyes peer through that of my Drones, their eyes darting between each other as they marched for the hallway before my eyes I saw the staircase, but something slithered up the stairs, forcing my Drones to halt in place. To my eyes I saw that creature, the one that insulted me before, he was a mere fool with power not worthy to be in his hands, but this...this was different.

His hand clasped his right eye, teeth bare as he stumbled up the steps towards my brood, but not a single one budged from place. Only staring back at the grunting man as he moved towards them. His lips moved, but I couldn't hear him, nor make out what he was saying to my brood, but it frightened them, I felt their terror bounce back to me.

He was laughing. Not talking, but laughing as his left eye turned to look at the Changeling I looked through, but...was he looking at me? That insane stare was a pinprick, but the pupil was staring back at me through my own magic field. I...I will not tolerate this any longer, I -

We see you

I lost my connection to the changeling's mind, so with a quick redirection, I jumped to another, only to have my stomach turn at the sight of Chris standing tall with the Changeling held high above him, green blood flew from his stomach, two claws had pried the Drone in two, spilling guts and blood like a fountain atop my brood, with a turn, his eye blinked once and the eyes of another changeling went dark.

Turning to another, I felt my blood run cold, seeing the index and middle finger of Chirs piercing the eyes of the previous changeling, pulling back to allow the Drone to scream in terror, only to have another tendril from the stairway snap his neck, throwing his corpse into the wall with a silent splat, green staining the walls.

We know you

Once more I felt my gaze shift to another, and I could only watch as more of my Hive was subjugated to the horrific deaths by this monster's hands. Another had his spine torn out and used to gorge the chest of another, ribs sticking out as his body fell to the floor too in a heap. Two more were held high in the air, tendrils coiled tenderly around their necks, soon the two tendrils pulled them apart, with a spin, the bodies of my Drones were smashed into each other with neck-breaking speeds, showing the eyes I looked through with blood.

"All Drones, fall back, you need to run now!" I yelled warily at the sight, thankfully my Brood did, most either separating or flying away undisguised, it didn't matter, they needed to run. Unfortunately, my sigh of relief was cut short as a remaining Changeling was held up by Chris's hand, eye staring back at us with a sickening laugh I couldn't hear, but even as my body trembled with fear, I stood strong as I stared back. "You are nothing but a monster. You are-"

We Are You

I couldn't hear it, but the sound of flesh and bone twisting and snapping could be heard from beyond the doorway, my final glimpse of Chris was gone, along with another of my Brood. This thing wasn't right, no human would consider such an abomination as their ally. No...Ruin, did he plan for this? Was he aware Chris was alive just so he could get his side of our deal? If so...was all of this worth it anymore? To my Hive?

I jumped slightly, a voice cackled by the doorway of the dining room, he was laughing, but his voice, no, their voices, hundreds of them were laughing, moaning, crying, yelling...he had broken through my Collective Mind, he could hear my thoughts and I too. With a wave of his finger back and forth, he stood tall with his hand still held to his right eye.

"You Are Us." His thoughts were dead, say for a single voice, small, child-like. Chris was gone, and I had little time to breathe, teleporting backward to avoid being impaled by a bloodied pike of tinted spines, still coated in my Hive's blood, it was sickening to watch, it wasn't Chris I was fighting, he was playing a pawn to whatever this black entity was, no normal human's sanity could last doing this, not as he was now

"You will pay dearly, monster." I fired a burst of green flames his way, and in a split second the voices returned in an ear-piercing screech from the fire. But with a 'Z' motion with my hand, I enchanted the ground under his feet, three arcane rings forming under his feet while he was distracted. "Subvenisti ruinæ ante fructum hunc tormentorum!"

The rings came to life, engulfing the manifestation of darkness with a bright, ivy flame, the tendrils coiling back towards its host to protect itself. But from the flames shot two silver lines, so with a quick turn on my feet, I watched as the silver projectiles flew past me, embedding in the wall. I readied another spell to cursed this abomination, it was my only chance to savor my plans and my Hive from damnation. Yet Chris was gone, instead, I felt the pressure of magic shift behind me.

I erected a barrier, the claws tearing through the ether with ease, I can't win with brute strength, but I needed neither it nor thoughts to conjure a plan, I simply needed to do what was fit for a mutt like him, play dirty. The moment his feet grazed where the remains of my shield were, the remaining fragments turned pitch black on contact, protruding a dozen stalactites to pierce his form, holding the monster in place as the columns ignited.

Yet the struggle under the flames and dark magic spires did little to stop this creature from attempting to grab me, even as I had used every ounce of magic in such formidable attacks, so why was the hand covering its right eye moving for a mask? I didn't wish to endure the suffering of my own kind, the ones that I had foolishly sent to their demise if I am to bring them closure, I shall claim this pitiful kingdom for not just myself, but for my Hive.

"You hear me, monster! You may believe yourself to be that which is the apex, but those smarter than you will always claim what is theirs." Raising my palm I increased the output of flames again, the pressure of heat was next to nothing against my hidden chitin armor

With a click of his fingers, the mask was grasped between his thumb and palm, quick to raise the mask against his face, covering the wild rotations of the right eye, and the pinprick left, leaving me with a skeleton face. But, the sudden pressure of magic had ceased entirely, the tendrils screeched painfully, their cries weakening with every second, my columns of fire and dark magic dissipated too, leaving a bloodied man behind, a strange, holy light shimmering across his tattered clothes.

He only wore a torn tunic, a belt that held up burnt trousers that smoked still, a device on his left arm and a few objects attached to his body by straps and chains, other than that, the foolish Chris had fallen to a knee, panting heavily as the remnants of that dark matter disintegrated to dust. The whole room was silent between us, say for his head raising to me.

"I just got nerfed." With a breath, he fell forward, slapping against the marble floor as if all that had transpired meant nothing. He was alive but weak...very weak. My head slowly conjured the pride I needed, and soon the laugh I deserved. With a simple motion, I moved for Chris, planting my foot against his back with enough force to crack something within his body, making him wince. "I'd rather you not do that."

"Oh? Does it hurt?" I pushed again, hearing him groan before I removed my foot and promptly broke his ribs with a sharp kick of my heel, rolling him onto his back to face me again. "You should never have defiled my Changelings, Chirs...I'll be sure to make your little friends pay with their lives, and it will all be on you."

"My Queen!" I turned slowly with a smug smile, seeing Phoird standing by the doorway with a majority of my own guards, all disguised like I to not arouse any suspicion. "We came upon our...mens' worry, are you alright!?"

"Yes, I am glad you are all safe, but our problem has been dealt with." I kicked him again for good measure, whatever he has done, it had taken away his power or a vast majority of it. "Take him to the Crystal Burrows, leave him and the Princess to rot down there together!"

"At once, your grace." With a small bow, their magic grasped him, and the bonds made of the same material as my throne bound his magic, leaving me with a bitter-sweet relief. If I had not stopped him, I fear this plague could have been far worse than just Canterlot's problem

"Resist. Refuse. Run. Do whatever you like, abomination, you will find no salvation here, in MY kingdom." The final slithers of our telepathy connection gave out, and I was left to regather my plans

Author's Note

Really working for that M rating. Be glad I'm here to at least keep this story on some form of understandable storyline. Do hope you enjoyed though.

Sincerely, Slendy

The overpowered has become less so, a shame but change breeds conflict which is what I desire.

And That's How It Is

"And that's how it is, you can put together the rest as of now." That was everything until this point in time, since the day I accepted the deal from Loki, became so powerful Gods were concerned about what I could do, all to end up down here...literal rock bottom, or crystal bottom given the new prison of mine. Although I did meet probably the most...chill person in this world. "You are...taking all of this too well."

"I just find it fascinating that after all you've been through that you can hold onto your humanity." Cadence, that princess who was replaced by Chrysalis, she looked as though a mountain what dropped on her head before being left to starve down here, the latter probably. But for the life of me, I can't grasp how she can honestly listen to me for this long

"I'm more surprised that you, of all people, are listening to me." Resting back against a crystal I tapped the mask over my face curiously. "This is by far the most important day of your life, ruined, yet you're listening to me...you're pretty fucking cool."

She smiled at that. "Why, thank you, Chris. To be honest I'm glad you seem to be faring a lot better than last time."

"When did we meet?" No seriously, when did I even make eye contact with her?

"I was present during that match between you and my aunts, back then you...well...I sensed little emotion coming from you, your heart was so twisted and...sinister, but now...I can't feel much, but I sense you're finding this amusing?" With a coy smile, I rested back, taking the mask off to throw it somewhere across the cave, not like I needed it anymore. Cadence then turned to me with a sad expression. "But I can feel sorrow."

"I lost the majority of my power, how do you think I feel?" She didn't look fazed by my tone, instead, she expected me to continue. "What else do you want me to say?"

"You do care about your friends? Swift and Spike?" I can say it, not sure how you convey it when you lack even emotions

"Sure, what's your point?" Sighing, Cadence moved to sit a few feet from me, moving her rugged hair from her eyes

"Tell me, if it were anyone else in the world, do you believe they would still be by your side as a friend, or would they see you as a monster?"

"Mmm, probably." In hindsight, I'd say those two must have nothing left to lose since being near me results in blood, death, or both. "Those two I'm surprised haven't tried to kill me or have and I just haven't noticed. One's now got the power to enslave worlds and the other can burn the leftovers if I wasn't so bored I probably let them kill me." Wait... "Forget that last part, I...okay, I'll level with you, I haven't eaten, slept or shat in months, all of which are making me regret my choices within the last hour since I got here."

"You're quite a surreal person, aren't you?" She was amused by this, well at least she isn't depressed anymore - hold on, am I...happy for someone other than myself? ...Wow, I'm a fucking asshole. "I can see how she's happy to be your friend."

"Tell me." I stopped listening to her after that point. "You know that gut feeling you have when you know you've fucked up, and its that twisted feeling that no matter how you shake it, try to drown out those thoughts, but it's not enough to rid yourself of how much you have to make up for? Well...I think it finally came back around."

"Chris..." No, this was...okay, guess it's about time I got my act together like Serafin said. Standing up to peer up at the roof of the cavern I kept my concentration on the castle above me. Closing my eyes for a moment I kept thinking of Swift, her appearance, her scent, emotions, everything...despite how creepy that sounds. "Gotcha!"

Opening my eyes I stared up at the ceiling and saw that among all the glimmering crystals, a tiny, blue flame flickered through the rock and it was moving slowly. Now with that sorted, I needed to find a way out.

"What are you doing?" Looking to Cadence, I pointed up with a thumb

"We're getting out of here and getting this train wreck of a wedding back on track, minus whatever bodies I pile up along the way." Grumbling, I sharpened my nails as I looked for a weak point within the crystals. "Without Blacklight my abilities are channeled through my stamina now but given my newly acquired hunger and tired state I can't rely on anything but what I have on me."

"Then what can we do?" We? Looking to my left, Cadence was moving to look around the cave like I was, searching for any sign of a weak point with me. "That creature has ruined my day, I swear when I get out of here I'll show her that love can be just as venomous!"

"Alright then, shall we?" I held out my arm, seeing the orange dial of the Verstrix pop up again. "Intangibility...Intangibility...Intangibility..." I slammed the dial down with a flash of orange. "Jibril!"

"Umm, Chris?" I looked to Cadence, then to myself and saw my smooth hands, and small pair of wings attached to my lower back, yellow robes, long pink hair...wait...Jibril?

"Ahh, tits!"

[Swift's POV]

"I swear, this is by far the dumbest stunt for him to pull!"

"Swift, please calm down."

"Calm down? Why would I be calm for an idiot you can't even rest without walking off to Celestia knows where!" I was beyond furious. "He does this every time. Nearly dies, rests for a few seconds, then boom, straight back into whatever calamity he finds himself in next!"

"You know, you two are awfully alike." I stopped mid-stride to look at Spike with a funny expression

"What?" He shrugged

"You both start ranting when you can't make sense of a situation or you result to being moody." I...don't have a retort for that, and Spike continued to look at me with a roll of his eyes. "Seriously, I think all of Ponyville can tell how similar you both are."

"I doubt that," I replied but he smiled anyway

"Sure, just don't say I didn't call it." Spike himself turned to sniff the air though, his eyes narrowed with confusion. "What is that?"

"What's what?" He pointed to the wall to my right, looking down as if the wall was missing or something. "A wall?"

"Something's under it, smells like...roses and rotten butter." I, in turn, looked to the wall again with piqued curiosity. "You don't think?"

"We might want to step back." Grabbing Spike, the two of us moved back a few inches, just in time to see something phase through the wall, the bodies were transparent, but soon shimmered into color, and it was a girl with wings on her back, but she looked like an angel with a halo above her hair. In her arms was -

"Princess Cadence!" Both myself and Spike gawked at the horrible state she was in, but she managed a weak smile

"I swear, if not for the ability I'd have shot myself." The girl spoke with a callous look in her eyes. "Alright, where the hell is the nearest kitchen!?"

"Uhh, that's the rose and rotten butter smell." Spike pointed from behind me, and then I noticed that small, orange circle on the girl's left shoulder

"Wait...Chris?" I felt a laugh snake up my throat. "W-what happened to you?"

"Don't you fucking you say a word." I tried to hold my laugh in, alongside Spike. "..."

"W-Why are you a-a girl~!?" Spike snickered as Cadence let out her own giggle

"They sure are good friends, Christina." I couldn't hold back my full outburst with Spike, the two of us holding our sides as we laughed, my earlier anger had completely trickled away at the sight of the depressed Chris, himself tearing up at our amusement

"...Despite the universe backhanding me, it is surprisingly comfortable without a dick."

Author's Note

I mean, the worst pain a man could feel is being kicked in the balls, without them it's completely painless. That is all.

Slendy

All it took was a bit of estrogen to make Chris cry, Women are scary.

Lets not pretend this is a surprise.

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Huh, death is rewarding.

Author's Note

I would like to inform those who read this that grammar won't be the best.
This story is an idea I made so input on if it should continue would be appreciated.
Some constructive criticism would also be nice.
There will not be any romance between anyone not already a couple like the Cake's for instance. If you do want shipping be a pal and ask for it and I'll consider.

Huh, death is rewarding.

Ugh, I'm just going to freely admit to everyone that dying sucks donkey dick, like seriously, Ow. Although, I suppose I shouldn't be complaining too much considering I'm not being endlessly totured for eternity.

"You're welcome for that." says a voice that came out of the void that I am currently stuck in and to make matters worse they seemed to be the basterdous type judging from the tone of their voice. But since I'm such a nice person I decided to respond to Mr mysterio in the only way possible

"Who the fuck are you." I say to the still nameless creature that is most likely God because there is no other reason I can ask think of for the voice to come out of nowhere.

"Mabye if you opened your fuckin' eyes you would be able to see me, ye twat." speaks the not-so-nice voice in the void that was supposedly just my eyes closed and for science I decided try and open my eyes only for them to light on fire because the amount of light is blinding and possibly corrosive, like Jesus Chris. What the actual hell.

There is one surprising thing that happened once I opened my eyes and that was the person standing in front of me looking ready to rip my dick off and wear it like a badge of honour. He was roughly 7ft tall with long white hair that cascaded down until just above his shoulders. He had two different coloured eyes the left of them being an ominous green while the right is a toxic purple. Them man himself was wearing a rather fancy looking brown overcoat with gold accents running across it. Underneath he had a yellow dress shirt with a red tie that had gold piercings it it for some reason, his left hand was wrapped in yellowish bandages and his entire right arm was covered in golden plate armour, for trousers he simply had grey dress pants and had black boots on. Across his waist was a belt that had multiple different clock like devices strapped onto it.

"Sooo~, you died." the guy says as if its completely normal, which it sort of is when you think about it. "Wanna not be dead? 'Cause I can do that." he states staring at me impassivly. As if my very existence wasn't worth his time but the mad glint in his eyes was like that of a child with a magnifying glass ready to cook some ant. Guess who's the ant.

"What do you mean and why am I not freaking out? I'm pretty sure I should be freaking out, saw the gun going off. Felt it aswell." I ask the guy because I'm honestly really fuckin' confused.

"I'll bring you back to life and your rather calm because I removed you ability to panic since dealing with that would be a waste of time." The strange guy says before moving on. "You'll be given superpowers of your choosing, cause I feel like it and a few other minor things. So make a wish kid."

I have no clue what is going on however I eventually realize he is waiting for me to make my requests. "Alright uhh, first one, light from Destiny." I say to him with a smile causing him to laugh a bit.

"Smart, you say light rather than a subclass so you get everything rather than a few. Aright, next."

"Well, if your giving away Op af stuff then how about Blacklight. Start it of with zero mutations of course, I want to work for my rewards." This was beginning to get interesting however seeing the look on the other guys face means some shits up

"Alright, fair enough. Considering the nature of Blacklight however you can only get one more ability." Well shit the jig is up

"I shall become the Avatar." I tell him with a smile, remembering back to the good ol' days of the last air bender

"Alright then, done. Anything else, other than an ability I can get you?" so that means as long as it not something I can do naturally I can have it

"Jackal and Casull." was my answer after sometime of thinking about it.

"Done and done. Now all you need to do is go to sleep and you'll wake up with all those neat little prizes. Oh yeah, remember when I said I'm stopping you from panicking?"

"Yeeaaahh?"

"I can't be bothered fixing that. Lets just pretend you have gamers mind from now on." Well thats definitely a useful ability. No getting stressed over anything. Cool.

"S'pose it's time for me to sleep for a new day of strangeness. G'night, man I do not know the name of." I say the guy before allowing darkness to consume me.

'Strange dream is strange.' I think to myself before standing up in the middle of a forest which, to be fair, isn't the weirdest thing to ever happen to me. Bible camp, ughck. As I get to my feet I find a strange weight on my sides and to my immense suprise, two pistols within a harness. Looking at them further I notice that they are more like hand cannons than pistols so I take both of them out and I find they are really damn heavy but i can lift them like they aren't shit. I also take notice to the writing on the sides of them that give away what they actually are.

"Aw piss." welp it looks like strange dream is reality as I'm currently holding in my hands both Jackal and Casull, as I realise the implications of holding these weapons I decide to check for the other things I asked for.

To test for the blacklight, I wasn't sure what to do to test it. So, after holstering my new weapons, I kneel down and jump, although rather than reaching a foot or two in the air I, at the minimum, reach about fifteen metres which, to me at least confirms I've got blacklight as normal people can't do that.

Know onto testing the light. Thinking of the least destructive super I begin, I don't really know what I did but I suppose you could say I searched myself to find a feeling and after about ten or so minutes I try to push it outwards and to some measure I was successful. In my hand was a small purple ball. It's definitely not the ward of dawn but it's something at least.

Now for the bending. Again I don't know what to do so I improvise by stomping on the ground with the intention of making a pillar of stone and it works to a certain degree. By that I mean all the ground surrounding me move upwards a few metres like a small wall.

"Ha, I hereby decree that this is the wall of Trump technique, capable of preventing people from immigrating into my personal space." after my little semi-serious joke, I begin to realise something about Blacklight

"Fuck, I'm immortal now, not fun. Ah well, thats future me's problem." So after that I take off into a random direction hoping to find something that could either provide a conversation or could provide a mutation for blacklight. This means that I'm actually looking for insects as while they are disgusting little bastards they have beautiful natural abilities like venom and an exoskeleton. Both of these I want as they can be incredibly useful.

Roughly an hour later I find my self within a cave and as far as I can tell it's empty aside from the bones and a still somewhat fresh corpse means that something lives here. Me, not being someone to miss an opportunity, walk over to the corpse only to realise that it is a rabbit and after thinking about it I decide to consume it because of a few reasons:

A possible agility increase.

More sensitive hearing.

Increase jump hight.

An animals intinct to detect danger.

Now because it's only a corpse I'm aware that I might not even get everything or anything but as they say. Fuck it.

I ate it like a normal person because I'm not sure how to consume but that doesn't matter for something this small. After eating I don't get any memories but that's to be expected for something that has been dead for as long as it has although that also means no instinct improvement aswell. I do feel like I could jump a little higher though but that may or may not be because of actually eating something. But one thing is certain, my hearing has definitely gotten far better considering everthing is a little louder now.

When I'm done thinking about all that I decide to camp in here for a few hours, after all, something had to have killed the rabbit.

After roughly three hours of practicing all my new abilities and then rehearsing them over and over again I finally hear a noise at the entrance of the cave and it definitely sounds tired judging from the short, quick pants coming from it.

Deciding it would be easier to kill it when it's sleeping I sneak off to the back of the cave and hide behind a large rock. I hear it walking into the cave and it's paws coming closer to where I am before it stops and I hear something collapse onto the groung. After a minute of silence aside from short breaths from the creature I peer out from my hiding place to what it is and to my suprise I've no idea what the hell it is.

"What the fuck." I say to myself in a shocked whisper. Lying on the ground was a giant lion type thing with bat wings and a scorpion tail, my eyes rest on the tail for a bit before deciding it definitely has venom in it.

I slowly shuffle over to the thing before stopping just short if the back of its head. After a while of debating with myself I decide what to do. I rear my right fist back before throwing it forward as hard as I can and again to my suprise, my fist went through its skull like it was cardboard.

The real shocker came next as red and black tentacles came out of my arm and fully encompassed the creature until all of it draws back into me covering my entire body in a slimy yet dry sensation. Then came the pain, while it wasn't enough to really phase me it was really fuckin' annoying, but it did hold useful information as I realised the pain was accompanied by a flood of memories.

It started with its childhood were it grew up beside it's family, after a while of that it, and its siblings, moved away because they all learned how to hunt by themselves, after a few years of that, it shows him going on a rampage due to a pain in its paw which, after a confrontation with six people and a thorns eventual removal, he calms down a fair bit and after that it's all irrelevant memories of it living its life down to a sharp pain in the back of its head and darkness. signifying his death.

The creature, apparently a manticore, did give valuable information such as flying and magic humans. That's a little hard to believe but after reminding myself I just ate a manticore in a few seconds it stopped mattering. Now all I'm thinking is, is magic biological and can I get it.

But before going of on a mage murder spree I stop to think about my new mutations. Athough there is another thing on my mind like how I'm so casual about wanting to kill for magic. I'm assuming thats the blacklight talking as I'm certain that it stops the production of sympathy and empathy and it makes you view life like your watching a film rather than living.

Back to my new found skill, I've got:

Manticore venom, numbs the nerves before stopping the heart.

enhanced senses

Knowledge of the beasts in this forest.

Huh, didn't get wings, how sad. Makes sense though, manticores never flew they were used for pouncing farther.

Now then, time to tame this forest.

After a month or so of living in the Everfree forest, I learned the name through a rather dashing serpent with a bi-coloured moustache, apparently a woman lives here as well but I've never meet her, I finnaly decide to leave the forest to the village I seen a after a week if living in here.

I also gain new things in the month I've been here, the thing I've learned or achieved are:

I've got boundless light meaning that all the supers I do need a few seconds for a recharge.

I can use the light powered melee and grenade attacks.

I've acquired some measure of control over each element.

Jackal and Casull run on my own energy, so they're pretty much Ebony and Ivory with rapid fire, explosive rounds.

Suprising fact, voodoo wasps live here and because I managed to catch one I can perform a form of mind control on animals.

I also consumed a centipede and got a few things from it like enhanced durability, flexibility, agility and dermal armour. The armour is not as strong as it could be but with enought biomass pumped into it'll get stronger.

So with all of that done I make my way through the Everfree.

As I walk through the forest I manage to hear faint screaming in the distance and because of my ever curious nature I set of to find the problem.

After a few minutes of running threw the forest I find myself staring at a pack of those wooden wolfs and unfortunately I can't consume them without getting termite DNA first. In the middle of the pack was a single child which confused me since I didn't expect a pack to hunt something so small. Unfortunately for the wolves I have a love/hate relationship with children. I aprove of communication, not so much physical contact.

Finishing my thoughts I lunge forward until I'm infront of the girl and low and behold the wolves back away slightly considering almost everything in this forest is aware that I don't take shit from anything, that was proven when I had to fight a star bear. The fight was fun so I didn't kill. The thing is, apparently those bears are the top of the food chain type stuff so me beating one in a one-on-one fight shows that I don't fuck around and I can and will beat the shit out of everything that pisses me off and these ol' dogs know that.

"Hey there, buds. Where's your alpha." and with almost no hesitation they all make a path to the biggest of the group and knowing it can't get away it walks forward, although it's brave enough to look me in the eyes the whole way.

When it stops in front of my we have a stare down for a bit before I flick it in the nose causing it to flinch back. Of course, I'm still working on strength control so it probably hurt more than it should.

"I can't stop you from hunting but if it can scream please kill it immediately, I'm not fond of loud noises." I'm aware I've likely signed a death warrent for hundreds if not thousands of people because as far as I've seen, these wolves are connected like some sort if ghastly hive mind and these wolves tend to do as I say but, that's not my concern.

"Since this girls screams were rather annoying, I won't let you kill her... Yes I'm aware that sounds weird but your the wolves who caused them, so you shall take the fall." the alpha look upset but resigns himself and walks away with the rest of their pack.

"Wow." I hear behind me and turn around to see the girl I just saved.

She looked about eleven of twelve with pale skin and long purple curly hair with a white stripe going along it. She was wearing a dirty jacket with and tattered dress that ended just above her knees, around her waist was a large, yellow bow with green polka dots around it. She also was wearing white and puple striped stalkings. On her feet were a pair of purple high top converse. The weirdest thing about her were her eyes as they were both swirly masses of purple with no pupils. A part of me wanted to consume her myself just to see what type of mutation can do that.

The girl must have noticed me staring at her eyes as she quicky look away with her face marred with sadness and fear.

"Why so glum, chum?" I tell her, trying to be somewhat friendly but I'm certain I failed.

"Y-you aren't upset about my eyes?" she ask me and I can only stare for a bit, thinking for an answer.

"Do they give you the ability to rend flesh with a stare?" I ask her, the question was ment as a joke but I don't think she got it.

"What! No, that would be horrible." she tells me, making me smile a bit, but it felt hollow.

"I suppose it would. Sooo~, what are you doin' in me forest?" I ask, curious as to why someone would come in here.

"The town I was in is getting attacked by diamond dogs, I managed to escape so I came here to find someone called Zecora to see if they can help... Are you Zecora?" I actually laugh at her last question.

"No, I'm not Zecora but I think I know who your talking about. By the way, what are diamond dogs?" that last question got a weird stare.

"They're a race of humans with a dog aspect. Like the dragon bloods." she explains before continuing "Wait, you know Zecora, you need to take me there."

"Okay, one: Don't tell me what to do. Two: I don't know where she lives and three: I'll help. I've got more combat ready skills then her... Probably." I tell her which makes her jump with joy and very large amounts of consecutive 'Thank you's' were given.

"This is great, but who are you." the girl say making me frown.

I channel a bit of stormcaller which coats my in electricity before staring at her with a with an attempt at kind smile.

"Licht. Chris Licht. Friends call me Light though. They also call me a Nazi, but we shouldn't worry about the small details." I say to her and she seems pleased with the answer.

"Hi, Light. I'm Screw Ball." Huh, strange name, but i've heard worse. Pretty sure someone in shrek was called fukwad or something...

...Wait a fucking minute. Screw Ball, I've heard that name before.

Motherfuckin' daughter of Daughter of Discord. Shit. Wasn't a big fan of My little pony, well at least they're human.

That wasn't Xenophobic at all. Maybe I am a Nazi. Well fuck, that would be good.

"Well then Screw Ball. Lets go slaugh- save a village."

The emotional chapter (I hope so anyway, let's be honest it won't be.)

Author's Note

I would say sorry for the long wait and shorter chapter but I wouldn't have done it if I was. This chapter was supposed to be longer but I figured I could just publish it now and show the world that the story isn't dead.

Let us pray I don't take brakes that long again and if I do i'll put it on hiatus.

The emotional chapter (I hope so anyway, let's be honest it won't be.)

How does on such as myself deal with a sad woman. If I be myself i'll just make it worse so i'll need to be something else. Sifting through the memories both mine and other I attempt to find a suitable response to dealing with Swift.

The overall consensus is don't be a dick and apologise. Simple enough, all I need to do is quell the erge to point out obvious Flaws and just listen to her all the while apologising to her. Geez, i've never noticed how hard emotions are until today.

Running through the Whitetail woods I continuously send out pulses to attempt to find Swift Feather and after a few minutes of tearing my way through the woods I eventually get a return pulse. Smirking to myself I begin humming 'Clint Eastwood' while making my way toward Swift. Honestly, it's time like these that remind me i'm a monster, not man. Here's me frolicking through the woods while humming a song all the while a friend is in pain and even though i'm fully aware that i'm meant to be upset I can't bring myself to care to much. True, i'm concerned, but it's more out of practicality than friendship. She's my second friend and I honestly can't be fucked trying to get another if we end up being... Not friends. What would we be then? Hmm, I told her about me murdering that slave pen so I guess i'd need to make sure she doesn't tell anyone.

I think we all know what that means.

After another couple minutes I begin to hear the sound of crying and rather than feeling concern I begin to feel... angry at Swift. It would appear that her emotional weakness is bothering me. Crushing my anger under cold hard logic of she's only human, she doesn't know any better. That sounded condescending, was that condescending? Probably, oh well.

Walking past and subsequently pushing a tree out of my way because fuck that tree, I see the kneeling form of Swift and cringe a little on the inside. This is either one of two things:

This is like some Disney shit were we are gonna singing or some shit.

This is like that thing from Predator, the one that didn't have Arnold and was likely a remake, can't remember, and she is actually surrounded by deadly traps that'll nip at my heels.

Deciding to use the fuckit button I begin walking forward and to my great relief there weren't any ankle biting traps, but that leaves option one as a possibility. Shit, if anyone is going to sing it'll be me, damn it! Is what I would say if I was born Equestrian. Fortunately, I wasn't so I'll be doing the sociopathic way.

"Heeeeyy girrrl, how you doin'?" Am I fucking awesome are what. See the voice that played in your head when you read that, it's exactly tge voice I used. For those of you who are boring, think basic black bitch. Score one for discrimination. Wait a minute.

"Did I just break the fourth wall? To be fair multiverse an' all that, wouldn't be surprised if I was actually a story." I wonder other people would react to realising they were only one in infinity, probably drive them mad.

"Whar are you talking about?" Ah yes, a regular mortal mind could never comprehend the infinite of infinities.

"You actually! So... Are you upset because I groped you or because I died, I promise you, one of them has a reasonable answer." And yet another reminder that I shouldn't be emotional support.

"It- You died! How am I not supposed to be upset about that! How do I know that you won't end up getting yourself killed in the future!" Wow, seriously, fucking wow. I know i'm supposed to care and all but I don't and it just makes this really awkward.

Good thing I took acting classes.

"Well... I mean, I suppose I could... Try and not be suicidal and mabye tone it down to reckless. At least that way when shit hits the fan i'll dodge it rather than being caught with my mouth open." I honestly think i've broke her, she probably wanted to hear an apology rather than... That. "Look, I know you want me to be safe and I appreciate that. But it's going to be near impossible for me to stop rushing head first into fights."

"But why?!"

"Uuuugh, right, i'm going to help you help me. So, prepare for some backstory." Yes imaginary friends, this is going to be a sad backstory. Or it would be if I wasn't the one telling it. "Back when I never lived in Equestria, I had what everyone had. A loving mother, a dad that's kind of a dick but loves you anyway, an irredeemable asshole of a big brother and a disgusting little hellspawn for a little sister. You with me?" I ask, hoping she actually paying attention. She obviously is.

"Of course." She seems a little on edge, probably still a little upset about my death.

"Anyway, one day me, my mother and sister where doing some good ol' Christmas shopping and, y'know, we were having a good time then... Then out of nowhere this jackfuck in a car came speeding down the road we were walking across hitting the three of us. Heh, i've always had the devils luck, so I survived but the same can be said for my family." Hearing a gasp I look up and see Swifts shocked face, for a girl who doesn't know what a car is she seemed to get the picture. "Anyway, their dead now, that sucks or... It used to, but that's another story. Passing by a few years I hear about a gang fight and within the next few days my brother's dead. Now the thing about my brother is that he is worse than me. He'll never back down no matter what happens. He was also a member of a rather violent gang. Put his personality and a gang together and you get fights, a lot of them. Truthfully, his death didn't bother me much as we were never close. But I do now that he always wanted to die in a gun fight and he did... Good for him, I guess." I chuckle seeing Swifts face, she doesn't even know who he is and she's more upset than I am.

"That's horrible. Even if you weren't close how could you not care?" oh, you really shouldn't have said that.

"I never, and I mean never, had a good grasp on emotions. They've always... Slipped by me without my notice. I know what they are and how they feel but I rarely got a chance to properly feel them." laughing a little I remember something "I used to play this card game with my mother. She would show me a card that would have a face displaying a certain expression and I would need to link expression with emotion, I always liked those games."

"Is that way your a bit cold to most people?" No, not here.

"Hmm, no, not ever sine I got to Equestria. Now, I don't feel emotion at all. Not unless I don't want to. I can literally force my body to feel an emotion by manipulating the chemicals in my... Uh brain." I don't have any organs, so I don't have a brain. Never thought about that before. Cool.

"What happened to your dad?" That... That is a good question.

"He should be fine, I mean, he was alive last time I saw him. Then again, I could be an unknown amount of years on the future." Yep, that's still the story i'm going with. Because it could be the future, I don't know how I got here aside from my first death. "The moral of the story is that my lack of emotion and the fact that i'm still getting used to having people care means i'll likely attempt to do everything myself without regard for other people." Being honest feels strange, but nice. Won't stop me from lying though.

"Can-Can you at the very least promise to try and take care of yourself?" Yeah, that's a promise I can keep.

"I promise to try." I say emphasising try because, Yoda be damned, I can't simply just do. "Anyway, lets go home because i've decided that i'm going to give you something and I think you'll like. Especially since its going to be from my boxes of super fun-tastic awesomeness." Yep, it's about time I start giving things to other people because despite my power-hungry instincts I still know that an army of superpowered people is better than a single superpowered person.

Now there's an idea, I wonder if Celestia will let me experiment with her soldiers.