Don't Drink so Much Coffee, Cady!
Cadance crunched the last coffee cup with her magic. Then she teleported it to the last trash can she remembered seeing. She put her now empty and shaking forehoof to her chest, and pushed outward. She sucked in a breath as she did so, feeling far too tense.
Breathe, she willed herself, and even her own inner thoughts sounded shaky. You're getting married to the stallion you love soon—
"Cadance?" a familiar voice questioned.
The pink mare whirled around clumsily, her smile strained at the edges, though she didn't know whether it was due to her own nerves or the will of caffeine.
"Hi, Luna," she said with forced cheer. "Lovely stars tonight." Her two purple eyes looked to the starry night sky, which was more ethereal and dazzling than Cadance could remember it ever being. It was what she should have expected with the rightful goddess of the night restored, but seeing a night-time that took one's breath away every sunset was something she wasn't sure she could ever get used to.
Luna regarded her stoically, completely ignoring the compliment as far as Cadance could tell. If she heard it at all, she sure knew how not to show it. "How many cups of that dreaded liquid have you had?"
Cadance gulped. Nerves weren't helping. Enduring the cool, mysterious stare of Luna's night-time eyes — she had discovered that Luna's eyeshadow was primarily for keeping this natural effect at bay — wasn't helping either. Those two cat-eyed pupils watched her with an unnaturally lofty calm that couldn't be matched.
"Seven," she said weakly. "At least seven."
Luna scoffed. "That beverage is most foul, yet you and Tia love it so. Spill what has you troubled, if you will. Just refrain from spilling another cup of such a foul drink into your body."
In the end, Luna gave Cadance a small smile. A friend's smile.
Cadance shuffled on her hooves, feeling only slightly reassured. "My wedding... it's soon... like really soon. There's still so much left to do, and I need to help Auntie. Shiny's as stressed as I am. Some of the invitations are going to end up being sent last minute and—"
Luna's neutral frown had returned, but Cadance wasn't bothered by the look. The sight was a look of ease from Luna and was about as small as the smiles she usually gave. "The guests are family and friends, no?"
Cadance nodded quickly and found that her head had begun to ache. "There's going to be a lot of socialites there too."
Luna blinked, frown twitching downward a little more. "Socialites?"
"Y-yeah," Cadance said, biting her lip. "I want a lot of ponies to be able to say they got to see a royal wedding. It's barely a once in a lifetime thing, since Auntie hasn't ever been married. I think it would make a lot of ponies happy, and I want the ponies of Equestria to be as happy as I am on my most important day."
"Socialites," Luna repeated, tone incredulous. Her black cloak shifted with her as she leaned forward. Her wide eyes normally reserved for wonderstruck looks and introspective stares were no filled now with an almost dire plea.
"Yes, Luna. Socialites."
Luna blinked again. "Eww."
Despite the stress, Cadance found herself giggling. Luna could always be counted on to say something strange and delightful in a way that took the weight off of her withers.
"The upcoming wedding is the sole cause of your nerves?"
Cadance knew that as soon as Luna spoke, she already knew the answer. Her head was cocked to the side and she watched Cadance like an owl watches a mouse. The cat-like eyes weren't helping.
"Well... no," she admitted quietly, bowing her head so her face could be hidden by her curtain of curls that not even the balcony's night winds could sway.
"Would you mind disclosing what bothers you?"
Luna's gaze was soft. The sight of her worry was the most genuine thing — other than the stress —that Cadance had caught sight of in a few days.
"There's a lot going on. I just keep feeling like something's gonna be overlooked... okay, Luna, since you're basically asking for it, can I... vent a bit?"
Luna looked around, confused. "There are no ducts, Cadance. We are outside. Has all that coffee addled you so greatly?"
Cadance inhaled again. Her hooves and legs tingled with pacing she wanted to be doing — even if it was something she wasn't prone to — but she was glad that her exhale sounded relieved. At least, a little relieved.
"Complain. I'm asking you if you'd listen to me complain."
Partial realization showed in Luna's gaze. "Is this... the fabled 'girl talk' that I hear so much about? Something I do not ever find myself... well, wanting to take place in? I would do it for you, Cadance. You're my friend."
Cadance giggled as Luna flashed a small, sheepish smile again. "Yeah, Luna. It's totally girl talk. Ten bits says we'll just be complaining about our heat cycles by the end of this, eh?"
Luna blinked again, and her natural composure returned. "I would rather not like to hear about the 'heat cycles' that mortal creatures are burdened with. It sounds annoying."
Cadance groaned and sat down on the tower balcony with an inelegant plop. "C'mon, you're like Auntie — three thousand years old, right?"
Luna nodded.
"See," Cadance pointed a pink forehoof at the darker mare. "You must have tons of horrible heat cycle stories."
"I don't," Luna said flatly, still standing as stoic as ever. "True Alicorns do not have heat cycles like ponies. 'Twould be an inconvenience to give a timed, finite cycle to a creature with my lifespan."
Cadance's jaw fell. "I WANT TO BE YOU SO BADLY!"
Luna's ears flicked at the sudden shout, but her expression remained cool. "If that is something that's going to be happening soon." Luna tugged at the color of her hooded cloak awkwardly. "I have little to offer in terms of advice for a mortal mare's seasonal burden. Perhaps you could locate a helpful book or sympathetic friend who would better understand your plight?"
While Cadance's laugh wasn't strain-free, it was lighter. This odd mare always had something to say that had her giggling like a schoolfilly again. "No, it's not that. You and Auntie Celestia... and any other goddesses are just so lucky."
Nodding absentmindedly, Luna leaned against the balcony's short wall, propping her head up with a hoof. "Very well. Please go on. What is your first problem?"
"Twilight Sparkle," Cadance blurted.
Luna snorted. "She is indeed one who can be a bit of a problem, isn't she?"
Cadance sighed and dragged a forehoof in lazy circles across the ground. "I know you don't get along with her that well, but I'm marrying her brother. She's gonna be at the wedding... it's just... Luna, I haven't seen her since I stopped foalsitting for her years ago... we just sort of drifted away, y'know? Auntie told me about her progress, but most of the time I was sent off on diplomatic trips here and there or doing all sorts of princess business. I am a ruler of Equestria, after all... just a junior one compared to you and Auntie."
"Mhm, I suppose," Luna mumbled, looking out at the stars, enraptured by her own work. Only the way her ears were pricked offered any indication that she was listening. "The drifting part with a friend — I've never experienced that before, not with anypony I shared camaraderie with. You're my first pony friend."
"Okay, but what if we pretend that you have had and maintain a normal social life?"
Cadance thought that Luna almost considered it, or perhaps the princess of the night was just lost in thought.
"I think that I shall pass. Even in pretend they are quite dull-sounding."
"Recluse," Cadance mumbled.
"Extrovert," Luna hissed back with faux malice.
A smile spread its way across Cadance's muzzle again, but the smile was still laced with the stress that wouldn't go away so easily. "Hey, if it weren't for my cursed extroversion, you would have had to stay at the Gala that Twilight and her friends trashed instead of hanging out with me."
Even in the dark, Cadance saw the curl of a smile on Luna's lip.
"Yes, yes. It is both a blessing and a curse, no? As for the Twilight Problem, why not just have your groom-to-be greet her first? Send the invitations and have her brother explain things face to face. Surely that's not a horrible idea is it? Twilight Sparkle is a grown mare, I'm sure she shall understand schedule constraints." Luna didn't tear her gaze away from the night sky, but her free forehoof would occasionally tap the short wall in what Cadance took as an analytical gesture.
Through the haze of caffeine, Cadance nodded slowly. "Yeppers," she drawled wearily, "That'll work. She's drifted a lot, Twilight. I swear that her studies in Canterlot sometimes were a gilded cage that always had the door open... but she just never wanted to leave. Shining didn't get the same treatment I did because he's her brother not her old foalsitter. If Twilight will listen to anypony other than Auntie, it'll totes be him."
Luna brushed some debris that was on the balcony, stirring a small bit of dust. She watched the motion of the motes and then waited for them to settle. "What else is on your mind?"
Sighing, Cadance began anew. "Do you think something bad might happen? There's never been a royal wedding before, not in the entire history of Equestria. I know Auntie's had stallions 'friends' before, but that was before I was even born, and she never wed any of them... I'm the first, and what if I don't set a good standard? Blueblood's probably never going to pop the question with his coltfriend — seriously, try using that new dream magic of yours to give him cryptic advice to commit because he and Joe are just..." Cadance stopped and blinked, seeing Luna's almost bored expression.
"Rant on," Luna said, "I am here to listen, am I not?"
"...What about you, Luna? I know that you're, well, not interested in anypony, and... were you ever? Even a little?"
Luna scowled. "No. I have told you this before—"
"I know!" Cadance said hurriedly, holding up her forehooves like she was a guilty suspect. "I'm sorry... it's just different. I've never personally known somepony like you. I've gotten letters from ponies like you who want help with asexual relationship problems, but never have I known somepony who just... didn't ever want something like what I have with Shiny... and yet still wasn't at least an admitted aromantic. Have you ever even looked at anypony and thought they looked... I dunno, nice or, uh, cuddly?"
"Never," Luna said with ease, giving Cadance a mildly cold glare. "I don't think ponies look particularly splendid, anyway. Unlike my sister, I have remained a maiden, and find nothing to regret in that choice. Now, what other problems might you have left to discuss? I can promise you that when you stand next to your Shining Armor, I shall be scouting the neighboring mountains for trouble. If anypony is to root out what might lurk in the old tunnels and woods on nearby peaks, there is none more capable than I. Though, I do wish Tia would let me officiate your ceremony."
Relenting to the night's breezes, Cadance swept her multicolored curls off to the side. "I don't doubt that one bit... it's just..." Her smile vanished almost as soon as it appeared. "I wish you could be there too, that's all."
The soft sound of Luna's feathers rustling and the swish of fabric caught Cadance's attention. Luna's wings stretched out from under her cloak, but those deep blue eyes rested on Cadance.
"Me?"
Cadance nodded groggily and hung her head, not caring that her curls fell into her face again. "That's right. You."
"Why me?" Luna stared straight at her, nothing but disbelief shining in her eyes.
"Luna, you're my friend. Ever since you've returned, you've been so much fun to hang out with... when you bother at least, recluse. I think you're fun to talk to, even if you just listen to me complain about a lot of silly things and do even sillier things."
"To be quite frank, I do not really see why or how you expect me to hear music stored within those strange black dinner plates of yours when there's a hole in the middle. What purpose could they possibly serve if they all have holes in them? I haven't the faintest idea to what spell activates them, and yet you praise them and their alleged contents constantly. That is quite silly."
Making a mental note of things to explain to Luna another time, Cadance tried to explain herself. "Everypony in Canterlot is really nice. Kinda. Blublood's... Blueblood. Auntie always feels so... perfect. She's got this god-queen image, y'know? Or at least she does for me... she always has. The staff are fun to chat with, and Raven's awesome!"
Cadance caught Luna nod to the last bit, and giggle into a forehoof. "Yes, Raven certainly is a wonderful pony to have employed at the castle. I know not what Tia would do without her. Why not have her at your wedding? I never really liked such affairs. I feel no connection to them... they're just unpleasant to me, like a stuffy summit filled with ponies who busy themselves with nothing but an unneeded idle chat over purpose."
"Oh," Cadance said softly, visibly disappointed. "I know you're a goddess Luna, but you've always felt... close to me. Despite being thousands of years old, you feel my age. There's a lot of mares in Canterlot I can talk with about basically anything—"
"Heat cycles," Luna deadpanned.
Snorting and grinning sheepishly, Cadance nodded. "Yes. It's always been easy for me to make friends, which is probably why I don't study it, but I've never had a friend like you."
Luna tilted her head to the side, and her mane rippled quizzically. "How so?"
Sucking in a nervous breath, Cadance looked down at the ground and kicked at it with a forehoof. "I always thought quiet, reclusive ponies... were just gloomy and creepy. I mean, yeah, I grew up from thinking just that. I know plenty of introverted ponies, but none quite like you... and while I did grow up and stop thinking that, I don't think I stopped feeling like that... not until I saw you looking so dejected at the Gala when everypony else was so happy and celebrating."
She knew Luna was just looking at her. She just knew it.
"I'm sorry, Luna," Cadance whimpered.
Luna shrugged. "I am used to it, you needn't apologize." She waved a hoof dismissively. "Many ponies think the same. It is not as if I hadn't heard similar notions countless times throughout the ages."
Cadance smiled weakly. "You must've heard everything before, huh?"
Luna shrugged again, and finally let her gaze rest on something other than the stars: Cadance. "Not really. An eternal life has more surprises than you might think, no matter how much might become familiar. Are you feeling any better?"
"I think," Cadance said slowly. "I'd probably better go see what Shiny's up to. Flower choices shouldn't keep two ponies up at night, but Luna, I swear that they're gonna haunt me."
There was that small smile of Luna's again, and Cadance saw her flick her dark tail. "You might wish to invest in some sleep too. I have mountains to scout." Her wings spread once more, and Cadance noted that she was poised in a way that made it clear she'd be leaping into the air shortly.
"It was nice talking to you," Cadance said softly when she knew Luna wouldn't say anything aloud.
Luna nodded quietly, and Cadance glimpsed the last of that smile before Luna took to the skies, cloak fluttering in the wind. Maybe Luna wouldn't show up at the wedding, but things seemed like they could be okay, and sleep certainly sounded nice.
Author's Note
While not required reading, this is technically in the same continuity as this story that comes before it and a prequel to this story. All are stand-alone works.
[Revised for print on 9/2/2020 and 1/7/2023]
