Author's Note

A complete rework of a story I had begun writing some time ago. There are more chapters to come. You can also read the companion story featuring Starlight Glimmer titled Get to Heaven if the premise of this story interests you. Thank you for reading.

Iamundernodisguise

It was unusual for Sunset Shimmer to be at rest. Ever since she was young her mind had been focused on climbing, on learning, on becoming more than what she was. The notion that who she is now was enough was a new concept, a welcome change to the self-deprecation that pervaded her life previously.

She owed much of it to Twilight, really. It was immeasurably fortuitous that their paths crossed when they did. To try so hard and to be beaten so soundly was one thing but to receive absolution in the place of vengeance cemented the place Twilight had in her heart. The direction provided by her in those few moments they spent together as friends changed her for the better and it was a change she was happy to bring with her back to Equestria.

Still, it was strange to be back here. It was home and it wasn’t. She had become so accustomed to human life and the trappings that surrounded it that the simplicity of pony life still seemed fresh and almost unreal at times. If she wanted fresh vegetables or eggs she need only visit a neighbor and trade something of value. If she wished to see a friend she could ride a train or hire a carriage. No more cellphones, no more computers. It was nice.

These were the thoughts that filled her head most days, idle musing of how far her life had come. The last time she was a pony she was making off with Twilights’ crown, filled with the kind of determination only hate could bring. Now her soul felt clean, bared to the beauty of the world around her. She took delight in the cooking of a meal for her friends, in the way the sun broke through the leaves in the trees.

Life wasn’t always sunshine and rainbows, of course. She would go stir crazy without obstacles to tackle or challenges to overcome. So it was that she found her old perfectionist streak transformed into a desire to change for the better when the opportunity presented itself. Lately, however, she had begun to feel stuck in her role. So it was that she asked to speak to Twilight today.

╔═╗

║┼║

╚═╝

They met in Twilights’ crystal palace and wandered its halls, talking of the change the two of them had undergone since their time in the human world. Sunset spoke excitedly of her time with the alternate Twilight and the other Elements, of the things she had learned from them. Twilight spoke of training Starlight and Trixie, two ponies whos’ stories mirrored her own in ways she found eerie at times.

“Do you ever feel stuck, Twilight?”

“Stuck? That’s a good question. Sometimes, yes. There are days where I feel like I should be progressing in ways that my mind or body aren’t yet ready for. It takes time to accept that you’re not always going to be the pony you want to and even longer to know that that’s okay.”

“I appreciate that. It’s just strange for me to feel this way because I’ve always felt like my life was building up to something, like I was doing everything for a singular purpose. It used to be a desire for power and nothing else but that’s changed. Now… now I don’t know what I’m living for.”

Twilight stopped when she heard this. That look of concern was all too familiar to Sunset. It seemed like there wasn’t a moment that went by that Twilight wasn’t concerned with the feelings of her friends. Sunset supposed that was the nature of the Princess of Friendship, wasn’t it?

“Not to make it sound like I don’t enjoy living, of course!” Sunset scratched her chin with her hoof, a sheepish look on her face. “It’s just… I don’t know what’s driving me anymore. I don’t know what my goal is.”

“Sometimes… sometimes you don’t have to have a goal. Sometimes you have to be yourself for nopony else but you. I’ll get nervous some days without a problem to fix or a monster to banish. Then I remind myself that that’s why I worked so hard when there was a problem. It was to have those days where all I had to do was loan a few books out or help bake a cake. I live a complicated life to enjoy the moments of simplicity.”

╔═╗

║┼║

╚═╝

As they walked through the halls, Sunset noticed a change of scenery start to overtake them completely. The ambience darkened and the scene took on a dream-like fog, a liminality creeping over everything around her. There was a warmth and a light coming from the side where Twilight walked beside her, betraying the unreality of the moment she found herself in. A voice not unlike her own spoke, coming from all around her and deep inside her mind simultaneously.

”Do you know who you are?”

Sunset kept her vision trained ahead of her, ignoring whatever figure now walked the halls beside her. It was best if she knew as little about this situation as possible, she decided.

“I think so? I’m Sunset Shimmer. I’m a friend of Twilights’ and many other ponies as well. What more do I need to know?”

”You have much to learn of yourself, dear Sunset. To accomplish that, you must first let go of the self you have constructed.”

A warmth touched her chest and began to spread through her body like wildfire, burning through years of perception. Almost immediately her concept of self washed away and she found herself afloat in a void of non-identity. She was no longer a pony or a human. She had no horn, no wings, no legs to stand on. She wasn't a mare, a stallion, or anything else. She was herself, a unique creation in an infinite sea of unique creations.

The voice came again, from inside herself. She felt the words in her throat, her vocal chords vibrating and lips parting to produce the sounds she heard now in her heart. Her heart, a drum of water pumping the miracle of life to her body.

”You see now who you truly are, yes? You see yourself with no disguise, no flesh to burden your sight. Feel the truth, Sunset, for it shall be your only guide in these trying times.”

Finally she turned her attention to the figure next to her and found it was herself she was looking at. It was her being realized, her dreams given form. She was completely alight, wreathed in spectral fire. She had wings and a horn and the air of totality that Sunset had sought since she was a filly. It was her without borders. It was who she was meant to be. Just as quickly as the vision began it dissolved, leaving her standing stock-still in the hallways. Twilight stood in front of her, looking her up and down.

“Sunset, what happened back there? You just… stopped walking entirely. I saw your eyes roll back into your head! What sort of crazy magic have you been dabbling in?!”

“You’re not going to believe me when I tell you this Twilight but… I’ve had a vision. One I very much need to tell you about.”

╔═╗

║┼║

╚═╝

That day they spoke about what she had seen and what it could have meant. Twilight made a promise that they would meet with the Royal Sisters the next day to figure out their next course of action. So it was that tomorrow became today, and Sunset awoke to find wings where there were none before.