Chapters The rapid-fire clopping sound of weather-hardened hoof against crystal flooring announced the last of the eight to arrive. Applejack slowed her approach to a trot after entering the throne room, and took her seat alongside her other six friends. The only pony without a throne of her own, Starlight Glimmer, stood awkwardly toward the rear wall and fidgeted with her mane.
"Sorry I'm late, y'all," said the farmhoof. "There's a lot goin' on down at Sweet Apple Acres this week, and crack o' dawn is workin' time."
"It's fine, Applejack," said Twilight Sparkle. "I'm just glad you're finally here! Starlight Glimmer hasn't even told me why she summoned us."
"Well, it better be important. I was having the best dream ever!" said Rainbow Dash, huffily crossing her forelimbs over her barrel.
"Oooooh! What was it?" said Pinkie Pie, punctuating the brief interlude with an excited gasp. "Was it about chocolate? Or marshmallows? Or ice cream? Or chocolate marshmallow ice cream!? "
"Pinkie Pie! Show some decorum, for goodness sake," chided Rarity. "You're sitting in a throne ." Situated between Pinkie and Rarity, Fluttershy cringed as though she were the one being upbraided.
"Guys, be quiet and let Starlight talk already, okay?" grumbled a bored-looking little dragon, currently lounging sideways in his proportionately tinier seat.
"Whoa there, Spike," said Applejack, tipping her cowpony hat upward to reveal a stern look on her muzzle. "Sounds like those manners o' yours might need a tune-up."
Twilight cleared her throat noisily. "Spike's delivery could use some work," she said with a brief glare in his direction, "but I agree with the substance of what he said. Let's give Starlight our full attention." Fluttershy breathed a sigh of relief, and a moment later all eyes were fixed on the presenter.
Starlight wore a forced smile. "Okay! Well, um. I'll just out and say it. I have a new spell I want to cast, but it's a little... controversial."
"Oh my," said Fluttershy, cowering in her throne.
"Define controversial," said Twilight. Her eyes were open wide, but the muscles in her jaw drew taut.
"I'm getting to that. Basically, I need you all here because I wanted to make this a group decision. This is a spell that could affect all of us," said Starlight. Then her eyes widened and she added, "For the better, I mean!"
"Hm. I detect a moral quandary on the horizon," said Rarity.
Applejack nodded slowly. "Same here. You asked all seven of us to come 'cause you knew Twi was gonna shoot you down, didn't you?" she added, narrowing her eyes in Starlight's direction.
"No! I mean, um, no," said Starlight Glimmer, as beads of perspiration appeared on her forehead. "It's actually the exact opposite of that. I think Twilight will say yes, because she's as curious about magic as I am, but I'm worried the two of us might not be, well..."
"Grounded in objective reality where the decisions you make can mean life or death for all the ponies around you and the entire future of Equestria could be at stake? " said Pinkie in a single breath, followed by a loud gasp as she inhaled sharply for a second round. Before Pinkie could speak again, Fluttershy placed a hoof in her mouth. She'd slipped out of her seat when nopony was looking.
"Let's take this one step at a time, okay Pinkie?" asked Fluttershy, with a gentle smile. Pinkie nodded through puffy cheeks, then gasped again with the hoof removed. Fluttershy returned to her throne.
"Do we even need the Element of Laughter here?" grumbled Rainbow Dash.
Fluttershy turned toward her other neighbor. "You're just grumpy because I woke you up."
"Ladies, please..." said Spike.
Starlight Glimmer coughed a few times, and everypony refocused on her. "To be honest, Pinkie Pie is dead on the mark."
"Well, duh ," said Pinkie Pie, rolling her eyes.
"Goodness, then don't keep us in suspense," said Rarity. "What is this mysterious spell?"
Twilight Sparkle smiled. "You've certainly piqued our interest, Starlight. Go on," she said, offering a reassuring nod toward her former protégé.
"Thank you, Twilight. Here's the thing. There are some really old books in the library that we received from Canterlot, and neither Twilight nor I have had a chance to look through all of them yet," said Starlight. "Long story short, after an all-night binge through the magic section, I discovered a spell that can predict the future path of all the residents of Ponyville."
"Hold on for just a moment, Starlight," said Twilight. "If you thought I'd agree to this, you might have jumped to conclusions a little early. Time spells are proscribed for a reason, Star Swirl the Bearded notwithstanding. Don't you remember the last time we got caught up in a time travel mess? We nearly destroyed Equestria!"
"Yeah, that sounds bad," said Rainbow Dash. "Let's not do that." Applejack and the others nodded in response.
"This isn't a time travel spell, guys. It won't allow us to alter history in any way, or even to mess directly with the future. All it will do is let us see problems that might occur in the future unless we take steps to prevent them," said Starlight, turning to face her former mentor. "Twilight, think about all the good this could do. Instead of a monster overrunning the town and putting lives at risk a month from now, we could stop it before it ever reaches Ponyville!"
Twilight Sparkle pursed her lips. "I'm starting to see your point. If we have access to this knowledge, it seems like it'd be wrong not to use it."
"Let's try it!" said Pinkie Pie, grinning from ear to ear. "What could possibly go wrong?"
"Twilight, I ain't gonna sugarcoat it. I don't like the sound of lookin' into the future," said Applejack. "The most valuable thing about tomorrow comin' is we ain't seen it come yet, if you follow. Ponies gotta live for today ."
"But, um, if we could prevent even one tragedy, wouldn't it be wrong not to at least try?" asked Fluttershy.
"Sure, but what if we can't prevent it?" said Rainbow Dash. "Then it's just twenty times worse! We already know we're hosed, like, a hoofball game in the fourth quarter when you're down by a hundred baskets. That is not a fun time to be on the losing team."
"Rainbow has a point too, and I've had personal experience with Neighvikov's self-consistency principle. So I'll need to see the spell before I can volunteer my opinion," said Twilight Sparkle. Before she could finish her sentence, the spellbook appeared in her hooves with an accompanying cyan-colored flash of light, already opened to the correct page.
"As best I can determine, the casting provides future sight to give us knowledge of imminent death in the local area. Pretty straightforward," said Starlight.
"Wow. This is really old, and my Late Middle Cornese is rusty..." said Twilight as she pored over the pages of the book with a wide, unblinking stare.
"Mine too. I've been trying to translate with dictionaries, but a few of these words don't appear in any of the authoritative texts. It must be an offshoot, maybe from another tribal group of unicorns, like the umbrum," said Starlight, pointing at the book. "See, this rune implies knowledge and future."
"Right, and this part of the spell gives the area of effect, and the duration," said Twilight. "It's clearly a twenty-four hour spell, there's no mistaking that. I'm not sure exactly who gets to see the future, though, because with this radius the spell should cover all of Ponyville, Sweet Apple Acres, and most of the Everfree and Ghastly Gorge. I'm also not clear on the kind of knowledge. Does this symbol imply darkness? Blood? Maybe it's ancestry-related..."
"Oh no. M-maybe this isn't such a good idea after all," whimpered Fluttershy, wrapping her wings about herself.
"Well, there is this ," said Starlight, pointing at the book. "I didn't know if anypony here might object to the idea—the dark thing, I mean."
"That won't be a problem. It should be safe as long as I help you cast it," said Twilight.
"Um, I hate to intrude on the egghead party, but do you mind clueing in the rest of us?" asked Rainbow Dash. Several ponies exchanged looks of agreement.
Twilight took a deep breath and pulled her nose out of the book. "Starlight has discovered an ancient spell written in an obscure language. It's really hard to cast, but with her and my powers combined, we should be able to manage with virtually no chance of error," she said. "The spell will only last for a day and a night, and it will affect all of Ponyville. Starlight and I are fairly certain it will allow us to see into the possible future, and use that knowledge to help prevent disasters from occurring."
"That sounds amazing! Do it!" squealed Pinkie Pie.
"Are you certain you wish to do this, Twilight?" said Rarity. "Including yours truly, none of the rest of us have the background to understand the spell, let alone the ramifications of casting it. In general, I would advise caution."
"Absolutely," said Applejack. "Measure twice and cut once, as Rarity might say." Rarity briefly smirked in her friend's direction.
"Um, what was that thing you said about us objecting to something...?" asked Spike.
"Ah, yes. Well, the only potentially dangerous thing about the spell is it uses a tiny bit of dark magic—" said Starlight Glimmer. Fluttershy immediately interrupted with a high-pitched squeak.
The look on Pinkie Pie's face flipped like a switch. "No, wait. Now this sounds bad . Like, really crazy bad. I think 'dark' means 'bad'. Doesn't 'dark' mean 'bad'? I mean, not in a racist or speciesist way or anything."
"I've used dark magic before, Pinkie. There's nothing dangerous about it. I've been able to control it without any side effects, and this is just one spell," said Twilight. "Most high-level alicorn magic is dark magic, like when I unlocked Zecora's memory potion."
"I, too, have used dark magic, as has Starlight's friend Trixie," Rarity piped up. "Those situations were not exactly problem-free."
"You were both using cursed artifacts, Rarity," said Twilight Sparkle. "This is just a spell. There won't be any effect on either of our minds, not even in the short term."
"It's entirely external," added Starlight. "That's the main reason I'm confused about where the knowledge comes from, but there isn't any way it can harm us."
Applejack cleared her throat. "That depends on what you mean by harm, sugarcube," she said. "Now, we're gonna do this all democratic-like, I presume. If that's the case, based on what little of this I can follow, I'm against."
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "Oh, come on. This is Princess Twilight Sparkle we're talking about! She's awesome," she argued. "And Starlight Glimmer is also kind of inexplicably awesome for some reason nopony seems to understand. If the spell actually lets us prevent disasters like Twilight says, we'll be fine. And even if we aren't, the eight of us can handle pretty much anything. I'm in."
Rarity took a deep breath. "Despite being a unicorn versed in magic herself, I'm certain I don't know enough about the details to accurately opine—nor could I likely learn much more without weeks of study at a minimum. I'd normally defer to our two experts, but I have a bad gut feeling about this due to my own experiences with dark magic," she said. "Therefore, I must abstain."
"Yeah, well... I hate to be the party pooper, but I vote no," said Pinkie Pie. "At least not until we know more."
"Wow. Pinkie being extra cautious," said Spike. "Weird."
"I'm not sure how much more we could learn without casting the spell, Pinkie," said Twilight. "I don't even know where to begin decomposing it if I can't figure out what it does in the first place. But it sounds like the overwhelming consensus is against, so—"
"Um, I vote in favor," said Fluttershy, interrupting with a very soft voice. "If that's okay."
"And that's weird too," said Spike.
Fluttershy shook her head. "I feel the potential for good here outweighs the potential for harm," she explained. "Of course I'm afraid of the consequences, but well, sometimes it's worth it to take a risk, in the name of helping others."
"Huh. Well, the two of us are obviously in favor," said Starlight Glimmer. "But we're both more than a little biased toward wacky magical experimentation, and the whole point of getting your reaction was to provide Twilight and I with more grounding. I'd prefer it if the six of you could come to a consensus, or else we should shelve the idea until we complete more research."
Twilight nodded. "I agree. So, with Starlight and me removed from the equation, that makes it two and two. It looks like the deciding vote falls to Spike."
Suddenly, Spike felt seven ponies staring at him, and his eyes widened in shock. "Me? " he said, inadvertently coughing up a green flame in the process. The little dragon paused for a moment in thought. "Well, listen, everypony. I know Twilight Sparkle really well. I've seen her make some pretty big mistakes before, but never after consulting with her friends like we're doing now. She's a princess for a reason, and I think she can handle this. I say we let them try it."
"Yesss, " said Rainbow Dash with a large hoofpump, as Applejack scowled at her. "Now that that's settled, I can go back to sleep. Right?"
"Not yet," said Starlight Glimmer. "It's probably best if you're all here when we cast the spell, just in case something does go wrong. Which it won't."
"Yes. Of course it won't," said Rarity, flatly.
"Wait, right now?" asked Pinkie, leaning forward across the Crystal Map. "How long will it take for you to get ready?"
"I think we're ready now, actually," said Twilight. "There's nothing to learn since we have the instructions right in front of us. The directions are very clear—it's only the semantic annotations we can't parse."
Applejack removed her hat and placed it on the Map. "Twi, I hope you realize just how much we care about you," she said, with a wry smile. "It ain't just anypony whose messes I actually look forward to cleanin' up."
Pinkie giggled, and the rest of the crowd put on brave-looking faces.
"Here goes everything," said Twilight Sparkle, standing up next to Starlight Glimmer. The book lifted into the air with a mixture of magenta and cyan auras, shimmering with iridescent blue sparkles. Both mages blushed momentarily as their auras mingled, then focused on the book. Starlight didn't appear to change, but the sclera of Twilight's eyes glowed a bright green as purple flames licked at the edges of her eyes and her aura shifted from magenta to black. There was a momentary flash of bright red light, followed by a brief squeezing sensation gripping everypony's foreheads.
The sounds of raw magic faded out, and all present looked around the room at the aftermath.
"Ow. What just happened?" asked Rainbow Dash, rubbing her eyes with an ankle. Twilight and Starlight were standing right where they had been, apparently unfazed. The book rested on the Crystal Map, now closed.
"Um, Dashie?" said Pinkie Pie. "I think you have something on your forehead."
Applejack paused for a moment. "We all do, I reckon. I dunno what mine says, but y'all got a big red 'ee eks pee' there, followed by what looks like a date. Fluttershy's noggin says 'EXP 5 May 1083 A.S.', for one."
"Pinkie appears to be an exception. Hers just says 'EXP', centered right in the middle of her forehead. There's no date at all," noted Rarity.
"I'm an EXP!" said Pinkie, proudly. "That's good, right?"
"I don't see anything on Spike's forehead," said Fluttershy. "Maybe it doesn't work on dragons?"
Twilight leaned in. "No, there's something there. It looks like a very thin, wiggling red line. I have no idea what any of this means."
"Rarity and Rainbow Dash look like they have... two dates? They seem to be blinking back and forth," said Starlight Glimmer. "Oh. Oh no, " she said, aghast.
Twilight looked back at her friends and gasped. Her face paled.
Applejack's eyes widened. Then she sighed, placed her hat back on, and used it to hide most of her face—including the date on her forehead. "Twilight Sparkle, please tell me this ain't what I think it is."
"What?" said Rainbow Dash, looking rapidly left and right. "What's going on?"
"Ooh! Maybe it's telling us when our favoritest birthday party will be!" said Pinkie. "No, wait. None of these are on your birthdays. Except Starlight. And that one can't be right either, unless she's WAAAY older than she says she is."
Starlight winced at Pinkie's comment, then spoke softly. "Okay. Well, I'll just say it. I think the spell is showing us the date that... we might die on," she said. "But this isn't a bad thing, necessarily!"
Rarity shrieked and passed out, muzzle thwapping hard against the Map followed by her head rolling to one side. Spike rushed clockwise past Twilight and Applejack to tend to her. Fluttershy squeaked and slipped beneath the table, while Twilight Sparkle simply grimaced.
Rainbow Dash began to sweat. "Starlight, this better not be one of those 'fate' things. Because I don't wanna know when I'm going to die! I mean, I don't even want to die!" Her hooves clattered against the Crystal Map. "I was really kinda hoping that wouldn't happen. Ever."
"I'm pretty sure nopony wants to know when they're going to croak," said Pinkie. "But... Oh my gosh you guys! We could have a huge 'going away party' the day before—no, wait, don't say it. Even I can tell that's an awful idea."
"How could Rarity die on two different dates, Twilight?" asked Spike, tears starting to form. "Does she come back to life after the first time? Please, please say yes."
Twilight Sparkle breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay, this is actually good news. The fact that Rarity and Rainbow have shifting dates implies there's a recursive loop in the spell's actualization."
"Smaller horse words, please," said Applejack.
"She means we can make use of the spell to prevent your deaths from happening prematurely," said Starlight Glimmer. "The spell shows us when somepony is going to die, but the magic remains active. So if the information we get from the spell would end up preventing somepony's death, the spell updates the image. But if not seeing the original date anymore would keep us from preventing the death, it shifts back to the previous date."
"It appears to update roughly twice per second," added Twilight. "Essentially, this means Rarity and Rainbow Dash would have died early if we hadn't cast the spell."
Fluttershy peeked out from under the table. "Oh my. I guess it was a good idea to cast the spell," she said, returning to her seat. "But, um, maybe we should agree to not tell each other when we'll die, out loud? Except for me, because I already know. Eep."
Applejack kept her hat on low, but looked up from beneath the brim. "Well, we should probably deal with the oddballs first," she said. "We already pointed out Pinkie ain't got a date, and Spike's just got a line. But Twi and Star are more than a little weird too, to tell it."
Twilight and Starlight immediately looked at each other's foreheads.
"Just tell me and get it over with," said Starlight Glimmer, sighing.
"Well, huh. Judging by the negative sign, apparently you died roughly ten thousand years ago," said Twilight. "I assume you don't want specific details."
"Starlight's a zombie?!" shouted Pinkie Pie.
"Zombie ponies!" yelped Spike, the noise finally rousing Rarity from her theatrics.
"Spike, please . I have a splitting headache," Rarity said in a groggy voice. She placed a hoof on her own head and used her leg to prop it up from the Map.
"Guys, I'm pretty sure I'm not a zombie," said Starlight, frowning. "It probably just means I do some stupid time-travel thing at some point and die in the past, which definitely sounds like typical me activity. Er, is mine blinking at all?"
"Nope, solid," said Applejack. "Everypony's I can see is, 'cept Rarity, Dash, and you too Twilight. Oh, and I'm near enough to make out Spike's red line jigglin' at roughly the same pace, but it still looks like a line. And it ain't two lines bouncin' back and forth, neither. Looks more like a constant wiggle from here."
"I have two dates?" said Twilight. "Um... how much of a difference?"
"Wow. Much, much larger than a normal pony's lifespan, but less than how far off in the future both dates are," said Starlight. "Wait, it just stopped! The earlier date disappeared, but I think I still remember what it was."
"That's it!" said Twilight. "Write it down for me."
"Are you sure? " asked Starlight, immediately summoning a quill and scroll in front of her.
"Yes! Now that somepony remembers the first date I would have died on, the later one disappears. That means remembering that the first date is dangerous will help me to prevent my own death," said Twilight.
"I'm a bit confused," said Rarity, now fully up and holding a shaky hoof over the right side of her forehead where the month and year would be. "Why does the earlier date disappear just because Starlight remembers it? Shouldn't it happen after you give the information to Twilight?"
"It happens as soon as you're fated to fix the problem, Rarity," said Twilight. "Once you know enough to prevent the problem from occurring, the recursion stops and the date remains consistent."
"Right. It has nothing to do with 'free will' or anything fake and silly like that," said Starlight Glimmer, apparently not noticing the exasperated looks across the table. "Here you go, old-timer," she said to Twilight with a smirk, hoofing her a strip of the paper.
"What?! This... can't possibly be right," said Twilight, eyes wide.
"EXP 22 Aug 13077 A.S., just like it says. As long as you remember that date, you'll die millennia later," said Starlight.
Twilight frowned. "I'm not sure I even want to live this long! Maybe it's due to another timeport spell?"
"Twilight, you're probably gonna live a long time," said Applejack. "You're an alicorn now, and someday you'll get that fancy mane-wavin'-in-the-air thingy, too. I hear tell that thing comes with an extended warranty, so to speak."
"Yeah. Like, deal with it , Twi," said Rainbow Dash, narrowing her eyes. "Some of us would be thrilled to live that long. And on that note, as much as I hate to jump into this madness, you might as well do me next." Dash gritted her teeth as though she were performing a Sonic Rainboom.
"Good. It just stopped on the later date. Here's the original," said Starlight, levitating another strip of parchment across the table. "You should probably memorize the date, and keep the paper with you just in case. Actually, I'd even annotate it to avoid any unnecessary chances. Write down 'I'll die on this date unless I take precautions' or something, then keep it somewhere safe."
"Wait, what?! I was going to die twelve years from now?" said Rainbow Dash, lurching away from the paper like it was a time bomb about to go off. "Okay, I guess I'm happy you cast the spell after all."
"I still ain't," said Applejack.
"Hay!" said Rainbow Dash, looking very hurt. "You want me to die? I can't believe that, AJ. I won't believe it."
"Of course not! I don't want you to die, sugarcube. But I'd still prefer it if we never knew any of this nonsense to begin with. Everypony gotta die someday. That's just the way it works. It's life."
Fluttershy shook her head. "I'm sorry, Applejack, but I'm afraid I disagree. In this case, knowing was a good thing. We've saved two lives already, and three once we fix Rarity."
"Well, we've extended them a good deal, anyway," said Twilight. "At least, I don't think mine counts as 'saved' if I've already lived an obscenely long period of time in the first place. Still, the sentiment is shared, and thank the Stars we prevented Dash from dying early on us. Rarity, I think you're next."
Rarity closed her eyes and sighed. "If I must," she said, then removed her hoof.
"Oh, now that's interesting," said Starlight, with a sly smile. "It looks like the nearer date is already gone. Did somepony here memorize it already?"
"I didn't memorize it, but I remember it was only a few years from now," said Spike.
Rarity gasped in horror, and then her face hardened into a scowl. "Well, that does it! I am getting a complete physical done, ASAP, with magic scans and all the bells and whistles. Plus a teat-cancer screening, even though I'm not nearly old enough for that sort of thing," said Rarity.
"Oh! I get it," said Pinkie Pie, bouncing in her throne. "We didn't need to know the exact date, we just had to know enough about how soon it was to convince Rarity to take precautions!"
"Whereas for Rainbow Dash and Twilight, it looks like the date holds some kind of special significance," said Starlight.
"Then what's up with Pinkie and me—" Spike began to say. Just then, a trio of screams cut through the air, pulling everypony's attention. The shrieks were coming from the direction of Ponyville.
"Oh, right. The area of effect," said Starlight Glimmer, with a sheepish fake smile. "Um, we should probably do something about that. Like, right now."
Suddenly, Applejack stood up, eyes wide, and adjusted her hat. "Twi, you know I hate to bail on you, but with your permission, I gotta get to the farm. Like, yesterday."
"Yes, of course. You're free to go. Good luck, AJ," said Twilight.
Rainbow Dash looked up at Applejack's forehead as she turned around. "Whoa! How do you live so long, AJ?"
Applejack blushed in response. "Longevity's an Apple trait, I suppose. Well... usually, anyhow." She pulled her hat forward to hide the date, which made her look more than a little silly. Pinkie giggled as Applejack galloped out of the throne room.
Rarity watched Applejack dashing off with a curious look on her face. "Twilight, I feel it may be prudent to find a way to cover up these terrible things on our faces," she said, fussing with her mane. Then her eyes brightened. "Oh! I have the most delightful idea. I presently have several bolts of fabric upstairs in one of the guest rooms. I was planning to make draperies for the castle, but most of hues I brought with me look simply dreadful against the crystal the castle tree is grown from."
"Oh, I get it," said Spike. "We can cut the extra fabric into strips, so ponies could tie them on as headbands. Nice thinking, Rarity."
"Yeah, well... sorry to bring this up, Rarity, but you're going to have to be more specific than 'dreadful' for us to know which colors you want to sacrifice. We don't all have your eye for fashion here," said Rainbow Dash.
Rarity rolled her eyes dramatically. "My goodness. Well, I'll make it simple, then. Anything between salmon and drab olive, feel free to shred."
"That's very generous of you, Rarity," said Starlight Glimmer.
"A fish and a fruit? Are those supposed to be colors , or what?" asked Rainbow Dash. Rarity tossed her an icy stare.
"I'm pretty sure I know what Rarity means," said Fluttershy. "I'll go take care of it in a moment."
"Ooh, and I can help!" said Pinkie Pie. "I'm really good at ripping things into pieces."
Rarity smiled at both of them, but the smile fell quickly. "Twilight, would you mind terribly if I went directly to Ponyville General?" she asked. "I'd rather not take any chances at this point, regardless as to what this garish mark on my forehead might presuppose."
Twilight nodded. "No, please, go right ahead. Try to explain the situation to them, because they may have sick ponies with only a short time remaining. Have everypony there cover up the dates on their foreheads, if you can. The hospital should have plenty of bandages that will work for that purpose. After we handle the rest of Ponyville, we'll do the hospital separately," she said. Rarity nodded, then carefully adjusted her mane to hide her forehead before trotting out the door.
Spike began jogging after her, but stopped short when Twilight continued, "Wait, Spike. I need my number-one assistant here, with me. Go sound the trumpet for an announcement. Everypony else, hang out downstairs near the entrance until I've finished addressing the town."
Spike sighed. "Right, fine," he said glumly from the hallway entrance, then shifted his course toward the foyer stairs.
"Looks like this is going to be a long day," said Starlight Glimmer, shaking her head. "I'm sorry about all this, everypony. I still think it was the right decision, but—"
"Eh, don't be," said Rainbow Dash, standing up and spreading her wings in a triumphant-looking pose as a smile crossed her muzzle. "Today, the eight of us are gonna kick death's butt."
Princess Twilight Sparkle stared down at the throng of onlookers. She wore neither her crown, nor clothing, nor any other other royal embellishments, but informally-nude was how she preferred to be recognized. Twilight did, however, have a makeshift yellow bandana currently blocking her forehead from view. In front of the castle door were thousands of long strips of fabric in a large box, delivered by Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy less than a minute ago.
Twilight scanned the crowd. There were hundreds of ponies present, and around one-third of them were actively shouting questions at the castle's announcement balcony—even before she and Spike had stepped out onto it. The sound was so loud and muddled, she could only make out the occasional question every now and then:
"What is this thing on my head?"
"What in Equestria is going on?"
"Does this mean I'm going to die? Please say no!"
"Help! HELP! HEEELLLP!"
Twilight Sparkle cleared her throat into a microphone Spike had hoofed her, and the cacophony slowly dropped. "Citizens of Ponyville! Please, remain calm. Today we face an important and unique challenge, and I need you to be strong of heart," said Twilight in her best Royal Canterlot Voice, which still wasn't very loud. Fortunately, the microphone and balcony speakers made up the difference. "I'm going to ask you all to gather up everypony you can, including tourists and visitors, and form a line outside of Town Hall. We'll be taking actions there that will end up saving some of your lives."
"What does this foal thing mean?" shouted Cranky Doodle Donkey, angrily pointing at his forehead with a hoof.
"Oh! Oh! What actions are we taking?" shouted Pinkie Pie from the middle of the crowd, wearing her own headband.
"Pinkie Pie? How did you get out there?" asked Twilight. "I thought you were waiting downstairs!"
"I am! Technically, outside is downstairs," she argued.
Twilight rolled her eyes, and the little dragon behind her groaned. "To answer the relevant question, you don't need to worry about the dates. After our initial round of work is completed, I'll be casting a special spell that will remove your memories of any specific dates you've seen. Until that time, just try not to look at anypony else's forehead," she said. "Thanks to Rarity, there are thousands of strips of fabric of all sizes at the front door for you to wear. This way, nopony else needs to see whatever happens to be on your forehead. These are intended for family members as well, so please take some for anypony you know who isn't present today. Fluttershy and Pinkie counted them and there are at least six thousand, which should be more than enough for all of Ponyville."
Twilight paused and scanned the crowd, estimating the number of ponies with toggling dates. For the moment, she still had their full attention. "We're going to need teamwork to get through this today, and I'm counting on each of you every bit as much as you are doubtlessly counting on me and my friends. We'll be joining you at Town Hall within a half hour to begin organizing the work."
"Should we bring the twins and close up shop while we're out?" Mr. Cake called out. Twilight didn't see his wife with him, which made sense.
"Yes, that would be best. We'll handle the infants first because they're unlikely to enjoy being stuck in line for what may be several hours. Anypony, regardless of age, will need to take part in what we'll be doing at Town Hall. Hopefully we can get this done quickly, efficiently, and in an orderly manner. Thank you all for understanding that I wouldn't ask this of you if it weren't of paramount importance. I'll explain more about what we're doing once the problem has resolved, which should be in about twenty-four hours, but suffice to say this is something nopony will want to miss out on." Twilight stepped back inside her castle as questions began to rise, and Spike shut the door behind them both.
"Wow. We're really in it this time, Twilight. What's the plan?" asked Spike. He followed her downstairs as she regrouped with Starlight Glimmer and the two pegasi.
"It's relatively simple. We need to do the same thing for everypony else that we did with Rarity and Rainbow Dash," said Twilight. "We'll line all of Ponyville up and check each date, one by one. If they toggle, we'll try to handle them right there and then. If that doesn't work, or if they don't toggle, but their date is prematurely young, we'll put them aside into groups to handle later. Given the decent life expectancy curve today, most ponies should be fine with the dates they already have."
"If we count whatever the hay Spike's forehead is doing, half of us were togglers," said Starlight Glimmer. "This might end up taking a long time. Too long, even. We only have about twenty-three hours left, so we might need to power through this with coffee and extra volunteers. We can probably take shifts screening ponies. Twilight and I should write up some instructions, and the rest of you can come to us if they don't cover some particular case."
"Um, I don't really enjoy thinking about it, but we do come into danger more frequently than most ponies," said Fluttershy. "Maybe only Rarity's 'toggling' should count. Rainbow and Twilight's dates might have been, um..."
"Hero-related?" asked Spike. Fluttershy nodded and grimaced.
"Good point," said Rainbow Dash, showing off with a wing flex. "Leaving out everypony standing here except Fluttershy, that makes what, one in three? That's, like, more than a thousand ponies. Unless my math is way off."
Starlight Glimmer shook her head. "No, your math is right... one in three would be a little fewer than two thousand citizens. It could be manageable if we can handle the togglers as quickly as we did for you two and Rarity, but that's still a very rough estimate, and we won't know more until we start screening. Without Rarity or Applejack to help, there's only six of us. Unless we decide to bring somepony else in on the details, we might end up with a scaling problem."
"I didn't see too many togglers in the crowd. Definitely fewer than one in four," said Twilight. "But even if I'm right, we could still top a thousand. If we need assistance, we have a lot of options, at least. Definitely Mayor Mare."
"Um, I think she has a cold this weekend, Twilight," said Fluttershy, frowning. "We'll probably have to go to her house just to handle her."
"Okay, then maybe Sparkler—that's Amethyst Star's nickname, if you don't know her. She's a great organizer. I can think of a few others too, but let's assess the scope of the situation in pony before we start recruiting," said Twilight. "I'd rather not spread details about what the dates mean if there's any way we can clamp down on it now. Ideally, nopony will figure it out, and clearing everypony's memories of the specific dates they saw will put things back to normal."
Rainbow Dash snorted. "Pfft. Good luck with that," she countered. "Few ponies are anywhere near the magnitude of egghead of you two magical mares, but if Applejack can figure it out—er, no offense to her, I just mean she's, like, relatively normal—then a lot of ponies in town probably already know what's going on."
Pinkie Pie entered the castle through the main door. "Party's over outside," she said, and pronked over to the discussion, carrying several extra strips of fabric with the tip of her mane. One was Spike-sized.
"Do I have to wear this?" said Spike, tying the green swatch around his head anyway. "It's not like my weird line says anything."
"I don't think we want to spook anypony, Spike," said Fluttershy, petting his head. "It's for the best."
"Hay there Pinkie. So, we have to find some way to organize the entire town, apparently," said Rainbow Dash, tying a yellow strip around her forehead. "Any ideas might be helpful, even the crazy stuff you usually come up with."
"Ooh! I know everypony in Ponyville. I could make a list," said Pinkie Pie.
"Wait. You know more than five thousand ponies, personally? " asked Starlight, the disbelief etched into her muzzle.
"She does," said Twilight, with a chuckle. "By heart, even. Including birthdays and favorite gifts."
"And if I do forget something, I have a file on everypony in the basement that lists all their public and private information, including their worst fears!" said Pinkie Pie, with a bright smile. "You should see your file, Starlight! It's like, thiiiiiiiis thick." Pinkie motioned with her hooves unreasonably far apart.
"Really? Really? " said Starlight, looking around from pony to dragon to pony. "And nopony here is concerned by this?"
"You get used to it," said Spike. "Sort of."
"Pinkie Pie is a good friend, Starlight. You can trust her," said Fluttershy, with a gentle smile and a leg around the magenta-colored horse.
"Hay, I just thought of something! If our deaths are fated, doesn't that mean we can do anything we want?" asked Rainbow Dash. "Like, doesn't this date on my forehead mean I can light myself on fire right now and run around and not die? Because that would be totally awesome."
Starlight shook her head. "No, Rainbow, it doesn't work that way—and please remind me to discuss this with Applejack and Rarity later," she said. "Sure, you might not die, but you could be in a coma for decades, or worse. We need to be just as careful about safety now as we were prior to learning about our 'deathdays', everypony."
"Starlight Glimmer is exactly right," said Twilight. "Anyway, Pinkie Pie's bizarre knowledge of the town should be a boon here. It makes sense to have her keep track of the crowd's progress. Rainbow Dash, could you and Pinkie start rounding up everypony?"
"Dang. I was kinda looking forward to lighting myself on fire," said Dash. "But yeah, we need to get moving. You and Starlight can make instructions or whatever while the rest of us get stuff set up. I'm sure AJ and Rarity will join us soon. They may have their own things to deal with, but they're no slouches when it comes to hard work."
"Agreed. Now, does anypony else have anything important they need to handle before we begin?" asked Twilight.
"My animals should be able to take care of themselves for the day. I already made arrangements just—" said Fluttershy, stopping short with a loud gasp. "Oh my gosh! What if the date thing is happening to them, too? I... I don't think I'd want to know..." Her eyes began to water.
"It's okay Shy," said Dash, hugging Fluttershy close. "They don't know how to read, right? We'll just... keep you away from animals for today, I guess."
"Well, why don't we just figure out if this thing affects semi-sapient beasts now?" said Starlight. "As far as we know, the spell should only affect people."
Fluttershy sniffed, and a little bluejay flew in from outside. She held up her hoof, and he lit upon it. "Oh, my. Mister Jay here doesn't seem to have a date," she said, and whispered to the bird. "What's that?" she asked, as he made little whistling and chirping sounds.
"What did he say?" asked Twilight Sparkle.
Fluttershy smiled. "Whew. It looks like it isn't affecting any of the animals, not even the pigs. Only people."
"Presumably, that still includes sheep and cattle," said Starlight. "And most of those citizens are under Applejack's direct care. She might need longer than we thought."
"I'm sure she'll be as quick as she can," said Twilight. Then she put on a serious face. "Okay, let's head out, everypony. Pinkie, bring the box of remaining fabric with you. We're going to need it."
"Here we go," said Spike, jogging forward toward the castle entrance as the herd began to trot alongside him.
Twilight Sparkle watched from inside Town Hall as Pinkie Pie directed pony after pony to the two available repurposed voting booths. There was a third booth, but it remained empty for the time being. Twilight crossed her forelegs and pouted. "This is so aggravating," she said. "That third booth is just standing there, empty! I don't know why I agreed to sit on the sidelines like this."
Rarity gently placed a hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "Pinkie Pie told me about the arrangement, Twilight, and I'm afraid I agree with the others. You and Rainbow Dash have terrible poker faces, and Spike's isn't much better," she said, gently. "We need somepony to handle quality control and manage this entire undertaking, and that is precisely where you excel. Meanwhile, Pinkie's at the 'front of the house' where she belongs, Rainbow Dash and Amethyst Star are busy locating everypony and keeping them in order, and Fluttershy, Starlight Glimmer, and Applejack can pony the booths."
Spike nodded. "It's not so bad, Twilight. You get to handle the edge cases, and you're here if anypony has an emergency. It's not like you're being lazy."
"There haven't been more than a hoofful of edge cases, Spike. We seem to be moving quickly with just two ponies doing the sorting, but Applejack hasn't even returned yet—which is starting to worry me, too," said Twilight, pointing at the empty booth. Then she sighed and rubbed at the base of her horn with a hoof. "Look... I'm sorry, guys. I shouldn't be complaining. I just feel like I'm weighing everypony down by sitting here and waiting, and I know how stressful this must be on all of you."
"There's no need to fret, Twilight," said Rarity, removing her hoof from her friend and using it to adjust the medical bandage covering her own forehead. "After I've rested a few more moments, I'll go ahead and pony the third booth until Applejack arrives."
Twilight Sparkle continued to sulk while watching all the activity going on inside Town Hall. Pinkie Pie was as efficient as she was cheerful, greeting each pony one by one as they slowly entered the building in a long queue that snaked back and forth over most of the free space inside. What little Twilight could see of the outside suggested the queue continued on for blocks. Most ponies who came through the line were dismissed relatively quickly, but the small number of ponies who required additional attention sat nearby playing board games and eating snacks as they waited. Although everypony had been headbanded by Rainbow Dash while still outside the building, Pinkie would sneak a peek at each pony's forehead in order to screen out some of the non-toggling ponies whose dates were so far in the future they didn't need to be checked. This helped speed things up considerably.
Spike was busy writing up more sorting cards labeled Still Toggles , Kinda Early , and Really Early for the mares in the booths to distribute to ponies who needed further study. So far, neither Starlight nor Fluttershy had requested any extra cards, but it gave him something to do. "Um, Rarity, I forgot to ask. How did the physical screenings go?" he said, wearing a concerned look on his face.
"They went very well. If you must know, yes , they found a small lump. But it can be easily removed, I won't lose the teat, and they can do wonders with implants these days. I suppose I might as well go the whole nine and get a full set," she said, with a wink.
Spike's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates, and his tongue slipped out of his mouth where it began to collect on the wooden floor, slowly coiling up into a pile.
"Spike!" said Twilight, her brow furrowed sharply.
The little dragon put his claws up in Twilight's face, still staring at Rarity. "Met meh heb tiss mument, Twuymuyght," he mumbled around his ribbony tongue.
Rarity blushed and smirked in response.
"We really need to talk about you leading him on," Twilight whispered to Rarity. "Blast it. I should have had this conversation with you years ago."
"Whatever do you mean, Twilight?" Rarity whispered back. "Spike is in his twenties now. I don't see anything wrong with flirting."
"We'll talk later," said Twilight. "And yes, I know my poker face is terrible. I just feel useless right now, and we have so many ponies to work through," she added.
As if on ironic cue, Fluttershy slipped out of booth two. "I have an exception case, Twilight. Mr. Waddles doesn't remember when he was born," she said.
Twilight pursed her lips for a moment. "Mr. Waddles is ancient. He doesn't need a card unless his date toggles or says something within the next year or so," said Twilight.
"But..." said Fluttershy, wincing.
Rarity nodded. "I'm afraid Twilight is correct, as usual. It's okay, Fluttershy. Ponies get old," she said. "The trick, of course, is to do so fashionably."
Fluttershy hung her head low and returned to her booth. The others could hear her muffled voice from behind the curtain, "It's okay, Mr. Waddles. You can head home now. Just keep the band on until tomorrow noon."
Twilight breathed a nervous sigh of relief. "This... this is way too much. I'm asking too much of you all."
"Nonsense, Twilight. We're always here for you," said Spike. "Fluttershy understands, too."
"Indeed. We're in this together, darling," said Rarity. "Our extraordinary service to the community is just part of the price of being... how would Rainbow Dash put it? 'Amazingly awesome ', or something along those lines. Saviors of Equestria and all that silliness."
Twilight Sparkle chuckled darkly. "Yes, I suppose," she said. "I definitely think you're all awesome for putting up with my shenanigans, at least."
"Just a moment," Starlight Glimmer said to somepony as she stepped out of her booth and looked around. "Oh, hello Rarity, welcome back. I assume everything went well?" Without waiting for a response, she turned to Twilight Sparkle. "Twilight, I thought you'd like to know something interesting: I just handled our first triple -toggler."
"That's fascinating!" Twilight responded, with an open-mouthed smile. "I didn't think we'd have any, given how the spell works. What happened?"
"I agree it's pretty strange. I don't know how to fit it into theory yet, but it wasn't hard to solve. The dates were cycling from latest to earliest, which is the reverse of what I would have expected. I wrote down both of the earlier dates and followed the rest of the instructions, then the whole thing went solid," she said. "Anyway, just wanted to share. Back to the grind." Starlight Glimmer smiled tiredly and returned to her booth.
"I feel even more guilty for finding this data so... so horse-feathered interesting," said Twilight Sparkle. "Er, sorry for the language," she added. Spike giggled at the profanity as he sucked his tongue back into his mouth like a plate of spaghetti.
"There's nothing wrong with how you feel, Twilight. It is interesting, even if it is a touch macabre," said Rarity. "At any rate, I think I'll go pony AJ's booth now. I assume this page holds the various instructions for classification? 'Look for toggle but don't read the date; if it stops, go to step 2a. If it doesn't toggle, ask the pony if it toggled previously...' Seems clear enough, but I'd expect nothing less from our resident genius."
"Thanks," said Twilight, now blushing herself. "Fortunately we haven't needed hardly any of the cards. Apparently, most of the togglers can be fixed right on the spot."
"Woo-hoo! We've hit the one-quarter mark!" announced Pinkie.
"I guess we're going pretty fast," said Spike, with a smile. "At this rate, we should finish the sorting before nightfall, and given the small number of cards being hoofed out, we'll have a lot of time to handle the special cases too."
Twilight smiled and exhaled deeply. "Oh, thank the Sun and Moon."
"I don't know how Pinkie keeps track of all of them," added Rarity. "You know, I'll wager she's not even counting the total. She probably remembers exactly which ponies have been through the line."
Twilight nodded. "Honestly? Pinkie may act like a lunatic much of the time, but sometimes I think she's a genius in her own way—"
Just then, Applejack burst her way into Town Hall, apologizing to each and every pony she bumped into along the way. "Pardon me, miss. Beggin' your pardon. Excuse me, sir," she said repeatedly, finally arriving at the side table where Twilight, Spike, and Rarity sat. "Um, hay, Twilight? I'm... I'm here to help now."
It was obvious from Applejack's reddened eyes that she'd been crying, which her friends recognized as highly unusual for the stoic mare. In fact, in the ten years they'd known each other, Twilight couldn't remember ever seeing her friend look this distraught.
"Oh no. What happened, AJ?" Rarity asked, walking up right next to her.
Applejack removed her hat, briefly exposing her date. "I, well, uh... I believe I can confirm that the date thing is indeed accurate," she said, softly.
"Dear sweet Celestia," said Spike, covering his mouth with his claws. Twilight and Rarity were completely speechless.
"No, no, it's okay. We knew she was gonna kick it sooner or later," said Applejack. "It's maybe a little premature, but it ain't a shock. She had yesterday's date, oddly enough, which means she must have passed on before you cast that horrible spell. So, I guess it works on corpses too."
"Oh Applejack, I am so sorry," said Twilight, grimacing as her own tears began to well. Rarity said nothing, but took an olive-colored headband she'd picked up from the table and wrapped it around her friend's head, then simply embraced Applejack close to her barrel.
"Again, it's... it's okay, honest," said Applejack—yet she held Rarity in her legs as tight as one of Harry's bearhugs. "And it ain't your fault, Twi. I'm not sayin' you were apologizin' for it, but even if you wasn't, just know that you shouldn't. It was bound to happen one way or the other, and I'm grateful for the times we had together." She replaced the Steedson hat on her head, now less awkwardly tilted.
"I can't even imagine," said Spike. "You probably need to go, like, make arrangements... or something?"
Applejack shook her head. "I reckon we got things under control now that Big Macintosh knows what's what. His forehead's so red you can't even see the EXP unless you squint, funny enough. I did squint, though, and he's got a long life ahead of him, thank the earth beneath our hooves. I told him to look out for Apple Bloom and to bring her here if her date ain't way off in the future or if it blinks. He's gonna keep her out of Granny's room as well. Bloom may be a grown mare now, but she don't need to see Smith Apple cold and stiff with that cursed mark still on her noggin. Granny already had her special air cooler thing on freezin' cold, so she'll be good for a couple of days at least. No worries."
"Applejack, I... I really don't want to bring this up now, but did you check on the cattle and sheep, by any chance? If not, I can send somepony to take care of them," said Twilight.
"Neigh, Mac got that covered too. They never complain about nothin', bless their hearts. There were a few of them with the blinkin' forehead thing, but I told him what to do to help them, so that's probably all fixed up by now," she said. "I'll check up on them later tonight." Applejack took a deep, empty swallow, and the muscles in her cheeks quivered.
Rarity gently broke the hug, and put on a very serious face. "You are not going to work in here, Applejack, and that is final."
"Nothin' doin'. I'm here, and I aim to help y'all," said Applejack, her voice less firm than the words it carried.
"Rarity's right. She can pony the third booth for you. You should go find Rainbow Dash and help her round up the rest of the ponies in town, excluding the ones in the hospital. Sparkler probably needs a break by now, and Dash has a list of likely stragglers Pinkie's been keeping her up to date on," said Twilight. "I'll send Starlight Glimmer to handle Ponyville General once we're done sorting here, though Rarity's already taken care of most of the staff and patients."
Applejack stared at the floor and pulled her lips tightly together, still stalwartly holding back any further waterworks. "Right. Right, yeah. Good plan as always, Twilight. Thank you kindly," she said. "And good luck on this end, guys."
Twilight smiled and brushed a tear aside. "Thank you for understanding. Even from the start, this whole thing hasn't exactly been easy for you."
A soft smile broke across Applejack's face. "Yeah, I guess not. But then, nothin' worth doin' ever is, is it?" she said, then winked and tipped her hat before trotting back toward the door.
"What a trooper," whispered Spike, shaking his head.
"Of all ponies, I can't imagine Amethyst Star requesting a break," said Rarity, with a sad smile. "Besides, we don't even need two ponies rounding up the rest of the town, do we? I mean, everypony who hasn't been checked is probably in line as we speak. That monstrous queue wraps around town square five times at least. When I came in here not ten minutes ago, Dash was entertaining the crowd, and Sparkler was idly fetching water and chairs for those who need them."
Twilight nodded solemnly. "Oh, I know. But Rainbow Dash will commiserate with her, and that's exactly what Applejack needs right now."
Rarity looked back at Twilight with misty eyes, then took her instructions and headed to booth three.
Twilight took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. Roughly twenty ponies sat at a long table in Town Hall, chatting as they ate food donated and delivered by The Hayburger. To the side at a separate table sat Twilight Sparkle, Starlight Glimmer, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Spike. The rest of the building was empty. Everypony else in town had already been taken care of.
"Starlight Glimmer, status update," said Twilight, between exceptionally messy bites of her burger.
"Well, it's almost nightfall. Everypony's been sorted since early afternoon, according to Pinkie Pie, including her sister Maud and Zecora. Pinkie's still out searching for any visitors or tourists we may have missed," said Starlight. "Big Mac stopped by to tell us the sheep and cattle were all fine, not to mention Apple Bloom. It appears we've solved all the togglers except for a few that Rarity and Fluttershy are working on at the hospital, and I'm sure we can trust them to manage that by themselves. We're left with surprisingly few ponies that still need our assistance, thanks to everypony's hard work. It even looks like we'll have enough time for a good night's sleep."
Starlight smiled and clopped hooves with Rainbow Dash, who spoke next. "Like Star said, great job everypony. Anyway, about the stats: not counting foals, most ponies who die before fifty die from accidents, falls, poison, or suicide. We have to learn about it in the Academy because part of what we do is roll-out prevention efforts," she said. "Most of those are going to be blinkers, so they've probably been handled by now."
"Right, so it's not a big surprise there aren't many left," said Spike. "I guess any foals would already be in the hospital?"
"Most of them, yes," said Twilight, wiping the ketchup off of her cheeks with a napkin. "Congenital defects are what tend to claim foals early, and most families know it's coming in advance. Minus those in the hospital, how many do we have in the 'Early' categories?"
"Um, pardon me for the interruption, but could you kindly explain the two 'Early' labels again?" asked Applejack. "I wanna be sure I don't make no mistakes if I gotta help out with 'em."
"Oh, certainly," said Twilight. "The 'Kinda Early' category is for ponies who are scheduled to die between one-third and two-thirds of their life expectancy based on current age and gender, while the 'Really Early' category is for ponies who will die sooner than that."
"Read this if you want a headache," said Rainbow Dash, passing an instruction page to Applejack. "The charts on the back tell you how many years somepony should live to fall into one of the edge cases."
"I thought my charts were more precise than this?" said Twilight, looking one of the instruction pages.
"Sorry, that's my fault. I changed them a little after we finalized them, Twilight. I appreciate your dedication to exactness, but we needed to be have a chance finish in time. I was pretty sure the math you provided would be too difficult for anypony else to do in their heads," said Starlight. "I used a close approximation instead. Any cutoff we went with was bound to be arbitrary anyway."
"Oh. Well, I suppose that works," said Twilight, wrinkling her muzzle up.
"It's fine, Twi. We can only do what we can do," said Applejack. "Besides, I still ain't sure what we can do for somepony if they're not a toggler. What options do we have?"
"We'll need to brainstorm on that now. How many Earlies are left, Starlight?" asked Twilight Sparkle.
"We barely have a hoofful of ponies left to solve. Two of the ponies over there are fine, they're just parents of the young foal next to them who still needs our assistance," said Starlight. "In total, there are fourteen Kinda and three Really , not counting the ponies who were in the hospital today. That said, I still have no ideas on what we can do about the non-togglers. The spell we used is fate-driven, and if we could have helped them, they'd be blinking already, wouldn't they?"
"There hasn't been much for me to do today so I've been wracking my brain on this for hours," said Twilight. "I keep getting stuck in a recursive loop with the logic. If we don't try to save them because they aren't a toggler, then it's consistent that we could have saved them as long as we never would have bothered to try in the first place. The reason togglers toggle is that we would have tried to find a solution for them regardless, either because their date was unusually early, or because something about the marking or the pony had a special significance that would have made us look deeper."
Starlight frowned. "Exactly, and that's another reason we have so few 'Kinda Early' cases. There have to be preventable deaths we can't detect, because the recursion doesn't capture them with the same kind of ontological paradox that causes the toggling in other ponies. There are lots of ponies who might have been togglers if only we would have used a looser criteria for the categories," she explained. "To put it another way, the spell isn't going to show two dates unless we would have written down the early date or otherwise looked for a solution, without having seen the later date. This accounts for Twilight, since her date is so unusual we'd almost certainly have written it down anyway. Plus, she's one of us, so to speak, so we would have been thorough."
"Well, if they're going to live one to two-thirds of their life expectancy based on however old they are now, unless they're really young at the moment, that's actually a pretty long life," said Dash. "I'm not saying we shouldn't try to help them, but we shouldn't beat ourselves up about it."
"If they're already old, that might even be past a normal pony's life expectancy," said Spike. "That's not a bad outcome."
Applejack nodded. "We had to get her done quick, and we did what we could," she said. "There was no way we'd fix them all. I mean, it's amazing we done this much."
Twilight held her hoof against the base of her horn. "I still feel guilty, but you're all right," she admitted. "Anyway, here's the crux of the remaining paradox that I haven't been able to solve. There's a chance we might be able to save some of the remaining ponies if we try. But, if we try to, and there's any chance we could save them, then they would already be toggling, because they fell within our screening guidelines... and they're not toggling. So we can't save them, which means trying to save them would be traumatic and pointless, but in that case..."
"...in that case, that reluctance to try might be the only reason we can't save them," Starlight continued. "Yeah, I've been thinking precisely the same thing. My gut here tells me there's nothing we can do. We've saved or extended the lives of more than seven hundred ponies today, which is beyond incredible. We might need to count this as a win and move on. Most of the Kinda's don't matter that much, except for a teen who will probably die in early adulthood—but he has cystic fibrosis, so that isn't a surprise to him or his family. It'd actually be weird if he didn't have the card."
"Okay, so let's ignore the Kinda's for now. Who are the Really's ? There's only three of them, right?" asked Twilight.
"Two of them are already over sixty, so I think we can put them on the back burner with the Kinda's ," said Starlight. "I don't mean that their lives don't matter, of course, but they've already lived a long time. The big problem is the third one, the foal. I don't remember his name, but he and his parents are tourists."
"How old is he?" asked Rainbow Dash, craning her neck to get a good look at the little colt across the room.
"And, er, how long we talkin'?" asked Applejack.
Starlight Glimmer closed her eyes. "He's five, and he has a little over nineteen months remaining. I did the sort myself, and there was nothing particularly unusual about him. His parents told me they recently took him in for an extensive physical when he fell ill, but the doctors found nothing abnormal. He got better after having his tonsils and adenoids removed, and that was that."
"Oh no. This is terrible," whispered Twilight. "We have to do something ."
A long silence pervaded.
"But what can we do?" asked Spike.
Applejack looked away from the group and stared at the wall as she spoke. "Guys, y'all need to recognize somethin' here. We can't stop everypony from dyin', that just ain't how life works. Maybe we gotta accept he ain't gonna live long, and make peace with it," she said. "Obviously if we can think up a plan to help him, we should take it, but... if we can't, at some point we're gonna have to deal."
"Well, even if we do give up like a pack of cowards, what in the clouds do we tell his parents?" asked Rainbow Dash.
Starlight paused in thought. "Wait a moment. Do we tell his parents?" she asked.
"Wow. I... I have no idea," said Twilight. "I mean, if I were a parent, I would... no, wait, I don't know. I'm not a mother. I have no sound basis for making an estimation."
"Maybe pretend it's somepony you know, like, your niece?" said Spike, and then he winced. "Sweet Celestia—Twilight, I'm already sorry I said that."
Twilight grimaced, but shook her head. "No, no, that helps. It certainly hits close to home. I'm pretty sure I'd want Shining and Cadance to know. But, well..." she said, her voice trailing off as she began to chew at her lip.
"Obviously we gotta tell them. We made this bed. Maybe it was the right thing to do, but now we gotta sleep in it," said Applejack.
Rainbow Dash shook her head. "No we don't! We're just going to traumatize the family by telling them the truth," she said, then dropped her voice when she noticed ponies at the other table beginning to look their way. "Do you really want to ruin the short time they have left together?"
"Well, they might already know," Applejack pointed out. "Surely they've seen his date. Maybe they only seem okay 'cause they're expecting us to whip out a miracle."
"That's a good point. Wiping the memory of his date won't be enough to for the parents to forget that their foal is terminally ill," said Twilight, rubbing her bleary eyes. "But, they're tourists, right? They don't need to remember anything at all. I could erase their memories of the entire day, and we could come up with some sort of excuse to explain it. So we still have a choice to make, I just don't know what the choice should be."
"It's a bucked-if-you-do, bucked-if-you-don't scenario," said Starlight Glimmer, staring into space.
"What happens if we can't decide?" asked Spike. "Should we flip a coin, or something?"
Twilight tapped her hoof against the table repeatedly. "No, wait. There is a solution." she said. "We could invite the whole family to stay at the castle overnight, and tell them everything, up front. Then, they would be able to make the decision. If they choose to forget what we tell them, I can cast the spell to make it happen."
Starlight Glimmer narrowed her eyes in thought. "I'm not seeing a flaw, but I have a bad feeling about the idea. Even asking them to make that decision is going to be traumatic. Erasing their memory of the proposal won't change the fact that we traumatized them in order to give them the choice. That kind of undercuts the utility of making them forget."
"Hmm. It ain't ideal, but I agree with the plan," said Applejack. "It's the only fair way to handle it, by lettin' the parents be the ones to make the decision."
"At least this is the only loose end, but... it's just awful," said Spike. "If we can't save his life, it's bad no matter what we do."
"Well, yeah, fine. It's really sad. But it would have happened anyway, okay?" said Rainbow Dash. "I mean, he was already doomed. It's not like we did this to him! We helped all those other ponies... we just failed to... ugh , this sucks." She quickly dumped a carton of horseshoe-shaped hay fries into her mouth. It did little to hide the glum expression spreading across her now-distended muzzle.
Twilight Sparkle sighed. "Unless we come up with another idea, I guess this is all we can do. I'll have everypony here go home except for the family. We'll invite them to the castle, and I can have the uncomfortable talk with them there."
Applejack cleared her throat. "You sure you wanna be the one to do that, sugarcube?" she asked.
"Yeah," said Twilight. "I need to do it, actually. Maybe it'll be cathartic for me, and maybe it'll be Tartarus. But I'm the regent here, and the ultimate responsibility falls to me."
"Twilight, you need to lean on your friends for support," said Spike. "It doesn't matter if you're a princess or not."
"Exactly. We're in this together," said Starlight Glimmer.
Twilight proffered a half-smile at that. "I'm sure I'll need your support tomorrow, but I can handle the talk tonight. Anyway, we should all meet again in the throne room before dawn. We can wait until the original spell elapses, and then I'll cast the memory charm to remove the date memories from everypony in town," said Twilight Sparkle. "But please keep your headbands on. It's important. I'll explain tomorrow."
"I think I already know where you're headed with this, but yeah, let's keep the bands on," said Starlight. "Thanks for your help, everypony."
Rainbow Dash swallowed the lot of fries in a single gulp, then coughed a few times before she could speak. "Look, we saved a lot of lives, including mine, and I'm super thankful for that. I don't think we have anything to be sad about," she said, looking sad anyways.
"Agreed," said Applejack. She gave Rainbow a sideways hug, which made the pegasus smile for a moment.
Twilight Sparkle tried her best to smile, but came up empty. At the moment, shouldn't feel sad and don't feel sad were light-years apart.
Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash trotted into the throne room. "I'm getting way too old for this," said Dash. "Sorry we're a little late, everypony."
"Hmph. You're barely twenty-nine," said Fluttershy.
Rainbow Dash frowned. "Uh, right. Just like I said," she added. Pinkie Pie giggled in response.
"Wow. Way to make a mare feel old, guys," said Starlight Glimmer, with a deep sigh.
"Cheer up Glimglam! You're bound to be an alicorn by the end of Season 10," said Pinkie Pie.
"Not even going to ask what that means," quipped Rarity.
"Twilight, did everything go okay with the family last night?" asked Fluttershy, as she took her throne.
Twilight Sparkle shuddered. "It was... rough. They already knew what the date meant, and I explained our plan. They discussed it for a while, and eventually elected to forget that their foal was going to die. There was a lot of crying, but right after I cast the memory spell I put them to sleep with a different enchantment," she said. "They'll wake up the next time they're directly affected by magic, which shouldn't count the cessation of the date spell, but will definitely count the limited memory-erasure spell I'll be casting on all of Ponyville. It shouldn't have any added effect on them since those memories are already gone."
"I'm just glad this is finally over," said Spike, leaning sideways on his chair. "Why does this feel so terrible when we did so much good? It's depressing."
"I can't imagine how medical doctors deal with this kind of stress," said Fluttershy. "It's hard enough doing palliative care for animals, but life-or-death surgery?"
"Physicians are made of special stuff, that's for sure," said Starlight.
"I definitely... no, wait a moment, where's Applejack?" asked Twilight. "Unlike yesterday, she knew about this meeting well in advance, and she's rarely late."
Fluttershy gasped. "Oh no."
Rarity tousled her mane nonchalantly with a hoof. "Applejack is a good friend with a lot of horse sense in her. If she got into some sort of trouble, she would seek our help immediately," she said. "Just be patient, I'm sure she's fine." Rarity then surreptitiously wiped a dot of sweat from her brow.
"Well, I hope she's okay," said Twilight. "We can go search for her after we finish here if she doesn't show up. But it's almost time, everypony. It'll be obvious enough when the spell expires, so you don't need to take off your headbands."
"Um, but why should you leave them on?" said Spike, the only one present without a headband. "I mean, obviously Pinkie and I don't matter, but aren't we all going to forget the dates anyway?"
"I still have an 'EXP', just in case anypony was wondering," volunteered Pinkie.
"We weren't," said Dash. Fluttershy reached out and poked her hard in the ribs. "Ow! Ugh, fine, I'm sorry."
Starlight Glimmer shook her head, turning back to Spike. "We need the headbands on to prevent either Twilight or I from remembering any more than we need to. One of us has to cast the spell, and it can't be cast successfully unless the caster retains her knowledge of the entire event. I'd rather be the one to bear the burden of knowing , but I suspect Twilight disagrees."
"You suspect right, Starlight. It makes the most sense for it to be me," said Twilight Sparkle. "You've already seen, what, two thousand dates? I didn't do any sorting, and as for everypony here, I've forgotten your latter dates entirely. Plus, I never knew my latter date to begin with. I was so caught up in my thoughts yesterday that none of the data shifted into long-term storage."
"You don't know that for certain," said Starlight. "It could come back to you later."
"Just let Twilight handle this," Rainbow Dash said, sitting up in her chair. "It's... it'll be fine."
"Agreed. Besides," said Rarity, "as much as I understand the magic in question, we'll still remember generalities of the event, won't we? Which is why you needed to handle the tourist family separately. They might not remember the date, but they would still have known it was coming very soon."
Twilight nodded. "Yes, exactly. After I put them to sleep, Spike helped clean them up so it wouldn't look like they'd been crying," she said, with a short sigh. "They knew exactly what they were deciding. I'll need to send them away from Ponyville for a couple of weeks just to be safe, but we can come up with a way to make it up to them."
Starlight Glimmer shrugged. "I still don't like letting you be the one, but if it ends up being a problem, we can probably come up with a fix later. Good luck, Twilight."
The friends broke into two groups and made idle conversation until Applejack galloped into the room. Her eyes were wet, but she was grinning wider than a yawning hippo.
"AJ? Is everything okay?" asked Rarity, her facade of calmness cracking immediately. Her hooves trembled against the armrests of her throne.
"Eeyup! Even better than okay. You ain't never gonna believe it," she said. "Get this. Apple Bloom managed to get past Mac and see Granny, and she had the crazy idea to write on her head with a red marker..."
"What? Oh? Oh! " exclaimed Pinkie Pie, mouth open wide. "And it worked?"
"That... okay, that's brilliant , which I've come to expect from Apple Bloom by now, but it's also completely impossible," said Twilight. "That isn't how this kind of magic works! If we could do something like that, it would lead to paradox after paradox!"
"Well, it done worked, so there you go. She turned a 1 into a 4—Bloom's mouthwriting's always been pretty, as you know—and Granny's back among the living, just like that. We're keepin' her away from mirrors, but she seems totally fine. She'll break the age record for earth ponies by several years if she actually lasts here 'till 1040 Anno-Sol and all," said Applejack with a chuckle. "Hopefully it won't be a slow decline, but well, we can cross that bridge when we come to it."
"Oh. My. Gosh. Twilight. Twilight! Twilight!!! " shouted Rainbow Dash, fiercely gripping the edge of the Cutie Map with her hooves. "Add a buckton of 1's after my date! Do it do it do it do it do it now! "
"Actually, that's not a bad idea," said Starlight Glimmer. "Wait, this means can save the foal! Holy Moon and Stars. We can save everypony! Forever! Seriously, nopony ever needs to die again! This is... it's just unbelievable."
"It can't work that way," said Twilight. "This has to be dangerous. Something will end up stopping us if we try, because the statistics are against it. Like, in combinatorial terms."
"Um, Twilight, I think you should know..." said Spike, but nopony was paying any attention.
"Well, we might as well make an attempt , for goodness' sake," said Rarity.
"Do me first!" said Rainbow Dash, lifting her headband as Twilight averted her eyes from the date... and then there was a bright flash of red light. "Ow. Did I do that?" Dash said, blinking several times.
"No, that was just the spell ending," said Twilight. "But that's fine, we can just cast it again."
"Guys, that might be a problem," Spike said much louder, to no avail.
"Twilight, where's the book? I thought we left it here on the Cutie Map," asked Starlight Glimmer.
Twilight's eyes widened. "I don't know! I didn't move it. Spike, do you know where the book went?"
Spike covered his face in his claws. "That's what I've been trying to tell you!" he said, exasperated. "It's not here anymore."
Rainbow Dash glared directly at Spike. "What. "
"It wasn't my idea! Look. I told Celestia about the situation because she mailed me last night and asked what all the hubbub was about down in Ponyville," he said.
"I doubt she used the word 'hubbub'," said Twilight Sparkle.
Spike rolled his eyes. "Fine, I'm paraphrasing. But she told me to return the book immediately. She says all of the spells in that book are forbidden, and she shipped it here by mistake. I sent it back Pony Express. Derpy left before midnight and headed straight to Canterlot."
"No. No, no way. That... that must be a mistake. Twilight, tell her there's a foal about to die!" said Rainbow Dash, leaning so far over the Cutie Map her chin was bumping Cloudsdale.
Twilight covered her face in her hooves, and her voice dropped. "I don't think it's a mistake," she said.
"But Twilight, this is an unfathomable opportunity. We could cure death itself! " said Starlight Glimmer, wide-eyed. "I mean, surely you can talk some sense into her?"
"I'm sorry, Starlight. Celestia and I... we've had this discussion before, on more than one occasion. Immortality isn't for everypony, guys. It would ruin society and prevent progress toward a better future. Ponies are supposed to die," said Twilight. "Even Princess Celestia and Princess Luna will die someday. When I last spoke to Celestia about it, she made a very convincing argument. I've had to accept that my parents and friends will all die at some point, no matter how powerful I become, and at this point, I'm afraid I agree with her general position on the subject."
"That's as it should be," said Applejack, narrowing her eyes in Rainbow Dash's direction.
"Easy for you to say!" said Dash, wings launching outward from her barrel. "You just gave an ancient pony, what, thirty more years? Meanwhile, a little foal is going to die in less than two! How is that even remotely fair?"
"It ain't," said Applejack, "and I wasn't the one who did that to Granny. I wouldn't have brought her back, to be completely honest. I'd even take those thirty years off her and give it to the foal, seein' as I know without question she'd agree to it, even though it'd pretty much be murder at this point."
"This is wrong. Talk to Celestia, Twilight," Rainbow Dash said, thumping her hoof repeatedly on the Map. "I don't even care about me anymore. At the very least, we should make sure everypony in Equestria can live a good, long life."
Starlight Glimmer slowly shook her head. "No. There's another angle to this I just realized," she said. "Sure, we could give everypony a long life, but at what cost? There's more to life than being alive . If we give this foal another thirty years, the most likely situation is that he'll spend them in a coma, or turned to stone, or something much worse. The future might not be much better for Smith Apple. Yes, the spell was a good thing to cast, but manipulating the dates like this is begging for a 'monkey's paw' outcome. And as Twilight implied, even the act of trying to fix things could cause a disaster due to the unlikely statistics involved. Like, a comet might crash into the castle before we get a chance to make the attempt, because as unlikely as that might be, it would still be more likely than lots of ponies living past their naturally-fated expiration dates. I mean, it can't kill us because it doesn't match our dates, but we could each be timeported to our fated deathdays at the same time. It might sound unrealistic, but when you're up against fate, the most likely scenario will win—even when all the possibilities are remote."
Fluttershy hugged Rainbow Dash as she began to cry, and Fluttershy cried along with her. "It's okay, Rainbow. I... I know you don't understand right now, and maybe you'll never agree with me, but death really is a natural part of life. I hate it as much as you do, but... maybe we need to move on, so the rest of his life can be normal." Pinkie Pie trotted over and joined the maudlin hug, but Rarity sat firmly in her seat and frowned.
"This... well, it's a big pile of wet horsefeathers , is what it is," said Rarity, invoking blushes around the room. "Pardon my Prench. However, as much as I hate to admit it, I also am forced to agree. Twilight is undoubtedly right on the bits this time, as usual. Plus, the idea of a comet smashing into all of us isn't a particularly pleasant thought. It would simply ruin my hooficure, for one." The dry humor eked a soft, sad-sounding 'heh' from Pinkie Pie, but that was all.
"It isn't fair," sobbed Rainbow. "It's one foal. Just one! Just, do it for him. Please?"
Twilight's face steeled with bitter resolve, and she slowly rocked her rump in her throne. "Spike, take a letter."
Spike looked down at the floor beneath the Map. "Twilight, I already asked her if there's anything she could do about the foal," he said softly. "I'm sorry."
"Well, what did she say, Spike?" asked Starlight Glimmer, before Twilight could even open her mouth.
"Again, I'm paraphrasing, but I kept the letters so you can read them yourselves. Princess Celestia said there are always options to save a pony's life, but those options are sometimes no better than death itself," he said. "When you go against fate, they're almost always worse, so it isn't worth the risk. She also said to treasure the time you have together, because those moments are precious... yadda yadda yadda. You get the idea."
"Twilight, this mess has gone on long enough. Let's get it over with. Please," said Applejack. Fluttershy and Pinkie broke the hug with Rainbow Dash and returned to their seats. Dash stopped sobbing and nodded in defeat, then sat back down.
Twilight straightened her back upright and looked out around the room. "My dear friends, we did something very, very difficult this past day. Our actions have saved numerous lives, including two of our own—or, three if you count my ridiculous extension—"
"Which we do ," said Fluttershy, with a gentle smile.
"—thank you Fluttershy—and for that we should be very grateful. An opportunity this golden rarely comes along even once in a lifetime," said Twilight Sparkle. "And now, we must trot forward. I love each of you dearly, and I'm sorry you had to suffer through this, but you did an amazing job, the ramifications of which will likely live on for untold centuries from the progeny of the formerly ill-fated."
There was a brief silence. "Anything for you, Twilight," said Pinkie Pie. "Equestria too of course, but mostly all the ponies in this room. Oh, and the dragons, too."
"Hear hear," said Rarity, her mascara starting to smudge a little beneath her lower lashes. "Thank you, all of you."
"Spike, I realize it doesn't matter now, but could you ask Princess Celestia about your squiggly line later?" asked Starlight. "I'm still intrigued."
"I already did," said Spike. "It's weird, but my date was just in small print. I'll explain more later. Oh, and she has no idea what's up with Pinkie Pie."
"Me neither," said Pinkie, painfully faking a smile.
Twilight Sparkle closed her eyes. Her horn began to glow as she cast the spell to remove the date information from everypony in the vicinity. There were no fancy flashes of light this time, but a momentary dizziness struck everypony else in the room.
"What a ghastly sensation. I take it that's why you wanted me to tell the doctors in Ponyville not to do any delicate work around sunrise," said Rarity, rubbing her temples. "I'm going to need at least three spa treatments after all this drama."
"That was the idea, yes. As a side effect, that spell should end up waking our three guests. They're bound to hear us down here and show up eventually, probably confused as anything. Spike, could you go make breakfast for eleven? I heard you in there preparing things before the meeting," said Twilight.
"You got it, Twilight," said Spike, jogging off into the kitchen.
In-between flipping the pancakes, Spike fetched four chairs so everypony in the castle would be able to take a seat at the Map. It wasn't long before the family of tourists wandered into the throne room. The parents looked exhausted and confused, but the colt seemed perfectly fine.
"Hello?" said the stallion. "I'm sorry to intrude, but we're very lost. We went to sleep in Ponyville's Dragon Inn, I think it was called, but we woke up here, somehow? Is the Castle of Friend—oh, the Princess!" The parents quickly bowed, and the colt attempted to copy them, to imperfect but adorable results.
Twilight laughed it off, dryly. "Please, I'm nopony special. Er, well, I suppose I am , but don't bow. We're very happy to have you as our guests. I'm here to serve you, not the other way around."
The mare nodded. "Thank you, Princess. Can you explain what happened to us?" she asked. "Are we in some sort of trouble?"
Twilight Sparkle shifted nervously where she stood, and Starlight stepped up next to her. "May I explain?" she asked, and Twilight quickly nodded. "There's been a mishap with a magical spell that affected most of the town. For your safety, we need to escort you out of Ponyville by heading around the farmland to the West, and we'll need to ask you to stay away from the area for at least two weeks. In compensation, we'll give you a voucher you can use later on to stay here at the castle for three nights and enjoy the city, plus a thousand bits to help with travel and shopping."
"My goodness, that's very generous!" said the foal's mother.
The foal gasped. "Thank you Princess Twilight!" he said, bouncing in place.
"You'll need to use it in the next, um... six months," added Twilight. "But if there are problems with that, let me know. We'll find a way to accommodate the three of you."
As the conversation continued, Spike busily brought out silverware and stacks of pancakes with butter and whipped cream on top in whimsical shapes.
"I guess if you need to be secretive in getting us out of town, you can't tell us what happened in more detail then," said the father, looking sullen. "I hope we've done nothing wrong."
"No! No, not at all," said Twilight, fighting desperately to force a smile to the surface, even just a phony-looking one. "You're fine. You've been wonderful—this, this is all my fault. Not yours. Don't worry about it."
"Then, um..." whispered the stallion, frowning as he leaned forward with watery eyes, "do you know why my wife and I are so terribly sad?"
Twilight Sparkle froze for a moment before saying, "It, well, um... it was a side effect of the spell, but it only hit a few ponies who visited from out of town."
Unfortunately, she could tell by his face that he wasn't buying the ruse. Internally, Twilight wondered if somehow he still knew, and then the realization hit her like a sack of bricks.
Nothing is more heartbreaking than losing a child.
Of course they knew. They were his parents. The emotions were crushing them so severely, the depth of sadness could only be caused by one thing. She tried to think of something—anything—comforting to say, but the words just wouldn't come.
So, Twilight Sparkle forcefully pushed forward a pancake stack with a silly-looking smiley face on top. "Um, pancakes?" she asked him.
It was the only smile she could muster, but it was better than nothing.
