Twilight and Rarity says no to Panda cheese

by Mark Pecan29

Rating: everyone
Tags: Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Second Person, Spike, Comedy, Rarity, Random, Crossover, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 1182

Going through their everyday lives, Twilight is about to find a world changing cure while Rarity tries to go on a diet. One doesn't have time for it and the other doesn't want it in her 'diet'. So let's just say a certain panda loses its marbles.

Going through their everyday lives, Twilight is about to discover a world changing cure, while Rarity tries to go on a diet. One doesn't have time for it while the other doesn't want it in her 'diet'. So let's just say a certain panda loses its marbles.

Published 2017-07-31 22:40:06 UTC
Last updated 2017-07-31 22:40:06 UTC

I said DON'T say no to panda cheese!

It was a sunny and cheerful day at Ponyville today, or at least to Twilight Sparkle, but not for long.

"Twilight!" Spike's voice boomed.

"Not now spike, I'm about to make a scientific breakthrough!" She shouted back.

Spike was heard coming up the stairs "Twilight it's been two hours since your lunch has been made, the bread will go stale if you don't eat it!"

"Spike this is not the time, I'm about to make history by inventing the cure for cancer!" She yelled back.

Spike entered the room and coughed to get her attention, but to no avail. "Twilight, I've even used this new brand of cheese that has been nearly sold out due to its popularity, you could miss out on the taste that makes this cheese so popular." He holds out a tray that has half a loaf of bread, a butter knife and a block of the supposed cheese he's been bugging Twilight about.

"For the last time Spike," she called back, "I'm not in the mood for food, not even cheese!"

The atmosphere of the room began to get eerily quiet, she stopped writing only to notice a large, fuzzy panda standing right next to her staring at her like she just murdered a box full of kittens.

She jumped back in shock, she could've sworn than she didn't hear any footsteps or breathing that could've revealed its presence beforehand.

Suddenly the radio on her desk spurted to life and started to play some sort of song she couldn't recognise.

Just you know why
Just you know why

The panda started walking over to the beaker.

Why you and I
Why you and I

The panda turned towards her and lifted its arm up.

Will by and by...

The music abruptly stopped as the panda threw the beaker down on the floor, shattering the beaker and splattering the medicine everywhere (it was pretty thick, even for medicine).

Twilight couldn't move, not out of freight but out of shock.

Twilight couldn't believe what she was seeing, those ingredients took several years to gather, and countless mistakes that set her back months at a time.

Unfortunately the panda wasn't done. It turned to its left towards the direction of the book that she had been reading from to help gather the ingredients and how to tell the difference between this thing and when you should harvest it, or that thing and how to preserve it.

It reached for the book and grasped it in its large furry hands. It then grabbed a test tube full of acid and slowly tipped it into the pages of the book while it was still closed, as if it was pouring a mug of coffee.

As the pages was being mercilessly eaten by the acidic substance, the panda threw the book out the window, into a wheelbarrow of manure still in the process of filling.

Now both Twilight and spike were in deep shock about what the panda just did. When they looked back at the panda it was gone. And a block of cheese tightly wrapped in tinfoil was sitting on the desk.

It was right about now that the song ended.

"You know" Twilight started. "I thing I will have lunch right about now."
________________________________
(This bit was written so that I could actually upload this fic (including this sentence))

"Hey Rarity, what do ya think about this cheese they're sellin' over there?"

"Applejack, as much as I would want to to so under normal conditions, I just simply can't." Rarity said to Applejack.

"C'mon sugarcube, what'll it hurt to have one?" Applejack suggested.

"Well, I've been putting in some weight over the past week, and I'm on a strict diet so that I may maintain my body shape." Rarity dismissed.

She looked at her shopping cart she was pushing around. True to her word she was stocking up on low fat, low calorie products and some fruits and vegetables without preservatives. It piled up so high that it was extremely difficult to control it without something falling off. Of course, Applejack repeatedly offered to help her with the payload but Rarity kindly refused every offer, saying things like; "It'll help my diet," or "You don't have to help me all the time darling."

They were about to head off to the aisle where the cans of fruit salad was until the cart bumped into something (knocking down the supposed ingredients for a zucchini slice).

Her heart stopped for a millisecond.
"*gasp* did I hit somepony?!"

Rarity let go of the handles and rushed to the front of the trolley, only to find a panda has placed its foot in front of one of the wheels to block the trolley's path.

"E-excuse me sir, but could you-"

The panda turned its head around slowly to meet her's.

Suddenly the current music that was being played around the store changed to a totally different song.

Just you know why
Just you know why

The panda gripped both sides of the trolley while placing its left foot against the side of the right wheel.

Why you and I
Why you and I

The panda started to shift its body weight to its side.

Will by and by

Before Rarity could react the bear tipped the entire trolley into its side, spilling all of its contents on top of the ingredients for the zucchini slice and partially covering the opposing aisle in eggs, cucumbers and capsicums.

Rarity's eyes were the size of dinner plates at what she just witnessed the bear just did.

Applejack popped her head over the trolley to see the destruction the bear made. All the while she was barely stifling a laugh. Rarity heard her and shot her a withering stare.

Her attention was brought back to the panda when it kicked over a pile of onions to reveal a bunch of caramel filled chocolates that was previously hidden from view.

The phrase 'kicking a dead horse' would've worked perfectly in this situation.

Applejack couldn't hold it in any longer and burst out laughing. Rarity's cheeks lit up in embarrassment.

The panda gave her a look that said "there's no excuse, give up." While holding up a block of panda cheese. It tossed the cheese into the trolley and started jumping up and down on the rest of her groceries.

Author's Note

Holy crap I finally uploaded a fic onto this website, and I would've wrote this in less than a day if I didn't forget about it for 2 days. Talk about efficiency.

Really enjoyed writing this one, it felt good to just empty my mind onto an iPhone screen after months (!) of laziness, not being able to actually write anything, forgetting about it and writers block. Hope this'll make a good first impression on my account. And for all future stories that I'll be posting on this site!

Rarity ran around the left of the trolley in case anyone was wondering.

Also I looove zucchini slice!