Author's Note
"I should write my fics, I'm lagging behind on a few of them, I can't wait to get star-"
Sees MAGA Covefe
This is created
This was just a friendly gag fic. For others, I also apologize yet another trump fic is on the front page, but I wrote this in merely an hour, and thought: Why the hell not?
All Trump's dialogue are actual quotes from him
Fire and Fury!
The sky roared with thunder, striking the sand with such a heat and ferocity to render it glass. Thousands upon thousands of Equestrian mares and stallions stood side by side, expressions stoic, trying their best to hide the fear heavy in their hearts. Their eyes were planted on the other side of the dunes, staring at a black gossamer shadow that stared back, the writhing horde appearing a void; so dense their number it was almost like staring into a starless night sky. It was courage that weighed their hooves down, planted them in the sand, as well as the inspiration derived from their… uh… leader. Who has yet to enter the battlefield.
Ponies weren’t built for war. Certainly they could field guard to protect the streets and to pacify crime… from other ponies. However the Changelings were an entirely different threat. They lacked the numbers usually to be much a menace, nothing a good culling can’t handle, however never before had such numbers been amassed before. At the front of what could barely be called a ‘line’, the mass writhing too much to be a cohesive legion, was their Queen. Chrysalis gave off an aura of malevolence that could be felt even a thousand leagues away, and it took a great deal of will for the many stallions and mares to not shake on the spot.
Chrysalis smirked. “Is this it? Is this the cavalry, their last stand? What a joke…” she chortled with a pretentious air, rolling her eyes.
Suddenly, as if on queue, the loudest and most ear shattering of the whips of lightning struck the middle of the desert plain, causing all gathered to hide their eyes at such an intense heat and blinding light. Sand was whipped up into the air, created a near impenetrable cloud, and many looked at with confusion at the occurrence. What possibly could have done such a thing?
Out of the quickly dissipating cloud, Chrysalis laid her emerald eyes upon two distinct silhouettes, her brow arching so high on her head it threatened to come off. She glances to the solid line of Equines on the other side, and saw many of their expressions contort into smiles, and she nearly gagged at the overpowering emotion that began to emanate from them: hope.
“Who da-”
“You are fake news,” a voice to match the thunder emerged from one of the large outlines, calm and unbelievably manly. Chrysalis blinked, and when the figures came clearly into view, she blinked again. Just what was she stareing at?
Her eyes were attracted to the larger of the duo. He was a giant of a creature, standing tall, above the heads of any other create in Equestria; his mere presence eclipsed the largest of dragons. He was clad in bulky and impractical armour, which shined a near incandescent gold - not unlike his brilliant blonde locks - and was decorated with many different ornaments and trinkets; an unfamiliar red, white and blue flag worn around his neck and draping down his back as a cape. She had heard the stories, the legends, but no, it couldn’t be…
“Donald Trump…” she muttered in disbelief, and a hidden underline of arousal. She looked to who flanked him. It could only be…
Mike ‘AC/DC for the LGBT’ Pence. He didn’t have as much an ornate appearance as Donald Trump, but he was only slightly less intimidating. Mike ‘Electrocution is the final solution’ Pence wore a very expensive looking suit, his silver hair making him look as shrewd as a fox. Mike ‘Turns trans into transistors’ Pence lagged behind Trump, stopping when he did, and only then did Chrysalis notice his eyes were alive with currents of sparking electricity. That answered one of her questions, although she still wondered why with every mention of his name - even internally - did he have something between his first name and surname. Mike ‘Touch the jewels, get the joules’ Pence was truly an enigma.
Donald Trump, with a swish of his patriotic cape, turned on his heel; his unflinching stare helping to rekindle the bravery in the gathered ponies hearts. Chrysalis stared, her lips parting in a snarl.
Donald Trump parted his lips to speak, and before the words even left his mouth Chrysalis flinched. Already he gushed with charisma and unflinching courage. “Remember this: Nothing worth doing ever, ever, ever came easy. Following your convictions means you must be willing to face criticism from those who lack the same courage to do what is right. These Mexi- Changelings are murderers, rapists, thieves, some, I assume, are good people. We will march forth into the world and turn your hopes and dreams into action. Amer- Equestria has always been the land of dreams because Equestria is a nation of true believers. And the future? The future belongs to the dreamers, not to the critics. The future belongs to the people who follow their heart, no matter what the critics say, because they truly believe in their vision. I have a vision of a great Ame- Equestria! You have a vision of a happy and great life. And the critics, will ruin that vision. So never stop fighting for what you believe in and for the people who care about you! March, for fire and fury!”
Despite being nothing more than an amalgamation of quotes, it worked. The Equestrian’s threw up their hooves, and their cheers and shouts echoed across the dune, causing the emotionless Changelings to live out their first every emotion: fear. Chrysalis was stunted, she looked at the advancing force with incomparable fury, and could already hear her army’s hooves on the sand… running in the opposite direction.
“Fight! Fight you foals!” she barked her commands to no avail, her brood wouldn’t even cast their eyes back. She growled, and in an act of defiance, charged toward the God Emperor, horn lowered; ready to impale the man.
She jolted when she felt a powerful fist clench around her stabby-stabby, prompting her to release a shriek when hoisted from the ground. “What separates the winners from the losers is how a person reacts to each new twist of fate,” Trump taunted, her teeth shining as brightly as his armour when he smiled.
“Unhand me!” she demanded, flailing in the air.
“All of the women on The Apprentice flirted with me - consciously or unconsciously. That's to be expected,” Trump cooed, prompting Chrysalis to blush.
“B-baka!” Chrysalis stuttered, her arousal was sky high!
“Grab ‘em by the pussy.”
“Argh!” Chrysalis stirred awake, a droplet of water colliding with her muzzle. She glanced around her surroundings, the entire landscape pelted with rain. She retreated here after losing that ‘battle’ (Very loosely used as none took place at all) and lamented on her defeat every single day to Celestia’s champion. She huffed, and planted her face back in the mud. Stupid sexy Trump, she griped, before turning over in her sleep. It was supposed to be her turn.
