Pinkoglycemia

by KinkHorse

Rating: everyone
Tags: Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1265

Pinkie Pie has to switch to a low carb diet on account of her rapidly fluctuating blood sugar.

Follow Pinkie Pie on a magical adventure as the earthpony discovers that she basically can't eat cupcakes anymore.

Published 2017-08-21 20:30:07 UTC
Last updated 2017-08-21 20:30:07 UTC

That time Pinkie Pie Blacked out in front of her friends.

Pinkie Pie’s tail was twitching... her hooves felt shaky, her legs were trembling. Like the pinkie sense, it came to her, but... this wasn’t an ordinary pinkie sense.

Six friends, one table, and a mountain of cupcakes. Pinkie pie couldn’t be happier. Her mouth babbled and babbled, in between bites, about all her newest ideas and creations in baking. Her friends were blissfully silent, save for the occasional “mmmhmm!” - the silence the universal sign that she had done her job right.

Fluttershy was the first to notice. The pegasus turned her head up and pursed her lips, swallowing a piece of cupcake. Her eyes trained on Pinkie with some - genuine concern. Rarity followed - and then Applejack and Twilight. Pinkie looked around the room - her eyes trembled and her friends became a blur. It was strong, this one, stronger than it usually was - for years she remembered her eyes being just a little bit funny at times, like they just wouldn’t focus.

‘Oh Pinkie, your eyes are glazed, have you been eating cupcakes?’ They said as a joke sometimes - but this look was more serious from her friends, like they were really worried on something. Mouth half full of cupcake, pinkie pie muttered out “what?”

She pushed back from her haunches and lifted herself up off of her hind legs. A collective gasp filled the room, but it was cut by the most horrible - grating noise, like a rockslide. Her heart hammered in her chest. The world listed - her vision went gray - and then flashed to black...

The next thing Pinkie knew, was that she was trembling. Her hooves shook, rattled, she could not make them stop. Her breath was a ragged - uneven pant. Her hearing began to pick up muffled cries of surprise, the feeling of hooves on her ribs, Twilight running out into the street and calling out “Help!” - and just like that her vision came back, first gray like her rock farm and then in full color. The shakes lasted moments longer, her abdomen convulsing before finally coming to a perfect calm... she panted and stared up to her friends.

“Yo Pinkie pie, are you alright?” Asked Dash.

“Oh my gosh, Darling, what happened?”

“D... do you n-need some water?”

She blinked slowly, her ears throbbing, and then weakly rolled onto her belly and stood up, and just like that - all was normal. She yawned and blinked, her eyes stirring around in a little whip - a blur - and like that all was well - or well enough. “I... I just need to sit down, is all.”

No- there would be none of that. Nurse redheart and two stallions were outside. Pinkie was ushered like a cattle destined for slaughter - loaded up onto a stretcher - and taken... taken away, to a comfortable bed, a beeping EKG, and a long nap...

Deep sleep, and Pinkie woke. Nurse Redheart sat there glancing over a chart. The earthpony’s ears flattened, she watched the nurse with Grave concern. “N-nurse?” She asked. “What’s wrong with me?”

The nurse poured over her chart one more time, and then turned to Pinkie. “I can’t say for sure.” She answered - “Your numbers all seem normal. So does your EKG. Blood pressure is a little low - but that’s about it. We can run a tilt-table test to see if you faint again... but that’s about all we can d-”

“OOOH - sounds fun! Fun!” Pinkie became visibly excited - and her body bounced on the hospital bed.

“Easy there.” The nurse suggested. “Part of the test is being able to sit still and relax... come on, I’ll get it set up for you. If you could - try not to bounce down the hall, Please.”

Pinkie did her best not to bounce down the hospital halls like the nurse Directed, though at a few times, the sight of balloons made her lips tremble in excitement, like watching paint dry, she knew she could do it. She was brought into a room that contained little more than a gurney, but... perhaps a special one. The nurse smoothed out the sheet on it and asked her to lay on her back.

With a mental-hospital like precision, Pinkie was strapped down, facing up towards the ceiling, where a single painting had been mounted, nothing more than a portrait of some flowers in a peaceful little grove. Nurse redheart explained.

“This test is pretty simple really. You are going to lay down on this table, and then we tilt it up until it is vertical, while monitoring heart rate and blood pressure. Maybe it will help us understand your fainting problem better.”

“Ooh - it would make sense that if I get dizzy when I stand up, I’ll get dizzy when I get tilted!” Pinkie cheered. The nurse sighed and shook her head, then reached a hoof out and gave Pinkie’s mane a few pats.

“Dearie, please try and calm down...” She suggested. Pinkie took a deep breath, and then let it all out - she just stared at the painting. An EKG was tied to her wrist, a blood pressure cuff slipped onto the other one. The nurses waited for her heart rate to slow, and then gave a simple count down from ten.

The table slowly tilted up, lifting Pinkie’s head way high above her hooves. She made a soft giggle, looking forward, and then watched - as if magic, as the world faded to black, her ears became full of beeping, Nurse redheart frantically exclaimed “Down! Down!” Just as her head went limp and her jaw slacked, and a puddle of drool rolled out of her mouth and splashed onto the floor.

Then, just like that, as soon as she was down, she was awake and alert again, if a little shaken, but only slightly. Nurse redheart looked over the chart, produced some pamphlets.

“Well Pinkie... you seem to have Vasovagal Syncope.” The nurse explained.

“What’s that mean?!” The mare asked. “Vase-oh-bagel Sink-o-pea”

Nurse redheart couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “It - it means that when you stand, you might faint... your blood pressure drops when you stand up - blood pools in your legs and lower body. It really isn’t - a big medical concern, but you have to increase the ammount of salt in your diet.” She explained.

Pinkie tilted her head. “But I eat plenty of salt.” She argued, glancing to the pamphlets she was handed as her body was unstrapped and she was let free of the table. “These aren’t much help... they don’t tell me why I faint at all!”

Just like that - call it a miracle of timing, a Stallion wearing scrubs rushed into the room, and passed a Clipboard with a single sheet of paper on it over to the Nurse. She glanced over it, and her eyes went wide for a moment, and then she bit her lip and looked to Pinkie. Pinkie glanced to the nurse curiously.

“Pinkie... did you have anything to eat just before you came?” The nurse asked calmly.

“Ooh! Yes! Yes I did! A Whoooooooole mountain of cupcakes - with chocolate frosting, and sprinkles; and vanilla, and chocolate swirl; and my new brownie cupcakes, with...”

“Oh...” Answered the nurse. “W- well, it looks like your blood sugar when you - came in was... 33 miligrams per deciliter.”

“33 miligrams per deciliter? What a fun number! What- what’s that mean?”