Discord Visits the Afterlife

by Zennistrad

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Fluttershy, Tragedy, Random, Discord, Slice of Life
Length: 1847

When you're an immortal spirit of chaos, why let the boundary between life and death stop you from saying hi to a friend?

The sudden and unexpected loss of Fluttershy was one of the most tragic events to have struck Ponyville in living memory, and most of her friends have struggled to accept the fact that she is gone.

It's a good thing Discord isn't like most of her friends.

Published 2017-08-24 10:40:05 UTC
Last updated 2017-08-24 10:40:05 UTC

A Pain in the Astral

Rain pattered against the ground in small droplets, dousing the grass and dirt with a light covering of moisture. Even without the darkness that had been cast over the sky by the clouds, the light that normally shown brightly over Ponyville in the summer seemed to have dimmed.

Rainbow Dash approached the casket, and placed a hoof over the glass panel that protected Fluttershy's body from the rain. Her friends had all gathered for the funeral as well, dressed in dull blacks and greys that matched the expressions written on their faces. Even Pinkie Pie showed no sign of joy, her usual self seeming both metaphorically and literally deflated.

Rainbow Dash sniffled, unable to tell the tears on her cheeks apart from the rain. "I-it's not fair. I... I never had a chance to say goodbye. I-I never had the chance to tell her how I really felt."

Applejack approached the distraught pegasus, and gently wrapped a hoof around Rainbow's shoulder. "None of us could have seen this coming, sugarcube. You did everything you could."

Rainbow Dash returned the gesture, wrapping both of her forelegs around Applejack in a tight embrace. Several seconds passed as the two held each other silently in the rain.

Rarity approached the two as they released each other from their mutual embrace. Her outfit was easily the fanciest of any pony attending the funeral, but its meager frills were greatly restrained in comparison to her normally extravagant designs. It was little more than black dress and hat, paired with a transparent veil that covered the top of her eyes.

"Twilight is about to give her speech," she said. "Have you seen Discord anywhere? I was told he would be arriving in time for the burial."

Rainbow Dash shook her head, unable to bring herself to answer in words.

"Ah wouldn't worry too much about it, Rarity," Applejack replied. "Fluttershy was the first friend he ever done made. If anything, Ah'm guessing he's still having trouble accepting her loss. It's probably for the best that we give him some space until he comes to terms with it himself."

"I suppose you're right," Rarity admitted. "He must be absolutely distraught, the poor thing. I just hope he'll be okay..."

———————

Fluttershy let out a noise of satisfaction as she sat atop her seat, happily munching on a slice of pie. The walls that surrounded her were of a quaint one-story farmhouse situated atop a seemingly endless expanse of clouds, clouds which extended even within the walls, making up the entirety of the floor. In the center of the cozily-furnished kitchen was a small table with an assortment of apple-related foodstuffs, laid out by both of Fluttershy's hosts.

"Oh, this is amazing!" said Fluttershy. "Your apple pie is the greatest thing I've ever tasted! What kind of recipe did you use?"

Bright Mac smiled. "Sorry, that's a family secret. 'Course, it also helps to add a bit of manna as well."

"Well, it's wonderful!" said Fluttershy. "Thank you both so much for having me over, I really appreciate it."

Bright Mac and Pear Butter both glanced into each others eyes, then turned towards Fluttershy.

"Actually, if you don't mind," said Pear Butter, "there's another reason we invited you over. We wanted to ask you about something that's important to us."

"Oh?" said Fluttershy.

The ends of Pear Butter's lips curved downwards slightly. "It's about our children. We haven't watched over them as much as we wanted to since we, er... left. We've been meaning to head to the Astral Observatory to check on them more often, but between eternal bliss and having no sun or moon, it's easier to lose track of time than we thought it'd be."

"Oh, you don't have to worry about your family, Miss Butter," said Fluttershy. "They're all doing very well for themselves. Applejack is a dear friend of mine, and Big Macintosh has grown into a fine young stallion. Apple Bloom's been doing a wonderful job finding her own way since she earned her cutie mark."

"Oh, goodness!" Pear Butter exclaimed. "She got her cutie mark already? That's wonderful!"

Bright Mac beamed, and wiped a tear from his eye. "Our little filly is growing up so fast. It's a darned shame we can't be there for her while it happens."

Pear Butter placed a reassuring hoof on Bright Mac's shoulder. "Come on, sweetheart, there ain't no use fretting over something that's out of our hooves. It ain't like anypony can just come and go from the Elysium as they please."

"True enough," Bright Mac responded. "Ah'm just glad they're living happily."

Fluttershy's ears suddenly began to twitch. "Um... not to interrupt, but did either of you hear something just now?"

"Like what?" said Pear Butter.

Fluttershy didn't need to answer the question. Rather, it was immediately answered for her when the entire house, save for the table, disappeared in a flash of light. All around the space where the house used to be was an assortment of ponies looking on in shock.

Bright Mac let out a yell. "What in tarnation!?"

Another flash of light, and several dozen miniature copies of Discord appeared, each of them dressed in white robes and carrying a trumpet. Each of them possessed a much larger additional pair of wings above Discord's normal wings, white and feathery like a swan rather than the usual mismatched wings of the draconequus, and each had a conspicuous golden halo above their heads that the ponies of the Elysium lacked.

The mini-Discords shooed away the surrounding ponies as they flew into a synchronized aerial formation just outside of where the house would be otherwise. They each blew on their trumpets simultaneously, but the sound that came out was not the sound of an instrument but the sound of a herd of sheep bleating in chorus.

A pillar of golden light appeared from above, and Discord descended from it, arms held out by his sides. As he landed atop the endless cloudscape, his miniature clones flew around him as he approached the table.

Then with a snap of his fingers, another flash of light engulfed the area. The mini-Discords disappeared, and the house was restored to its former existence.

"Welcome to the afterlife, Fluttershy!" Discord announced. "You're dead!"

Fluttershy briefly glanced towards Bright Mac and Pear Butter, who simply gawked at Discord in wide-eyed bewilderment. "Um... yes, I noticed. Discord, what's going on here?"

"I already told you," Discord replied with a grin. "You're dead, this is the afterlife, and I'm God."

Fluttershy's eyes narrowed as she shot Discord a glare. "You are not God!"

Discord waved a hand dismissively. "Blasphemy. You're lucky I don't smite you or cast you out or something. The bottom line is, your life ended about five minutes ago, under the inept ministrations of Doctor Beverly— hold on, something's not right here." A stack of papers appeared in Discord's hands, and he flipped through the large document rapidly. "Oh phooey, I've got the wrong script!"

Fluttershy sighed. "Discord..."

"Oh well," said Discord. He crumpled up the stack of papers and threw it over his shoulder. As it went through the air, the pages separated and folded themselves into a series of origami cranes, which flapped their wings and flew out the window. "Fortunately, as it so happens, I am also a master of improvisation!"

A microphone materialized in Discord's right hand, seemingly unconnected to any speakers or amplifiers. "Hello, is this thing on?" He tapped the microphone with a finger, causing a whine of feedback to sound out of nowhere from a direction that Fluttershy couldn't quite pinpoint. "Yes, there we go! Hello, Elysium! I just flew in from the mortal plane of existence, and boy are my arms tired!"

Discord looked at his self-appointed audience expectantly, but was met only with several seconds of awkward silence. Pear Butter looked over towards Bright Mac, and then back at Discord.

"Beg your pardon, but... don't you have wings?" said Pear Butter. "Why would you use your arms?"

"Ah was just thinking the same thing mahself," said Bright Mac. "Looks like great minds really do think alike!"

Pear Butter let out a giggle. "Oh, stop it! You're such a flatterer!"

"Ugh, why do I always get the tough crowds?" Discord let out a groan, and threw his microphone over his shoulder. Upon hitting the surface of the clouds, it spontaneously sprouted six insectoid legs and skittered into another room.

"Discord, this isn't funny!" Fluttershy blurted out. The entire room went silent as she stared Discord straight in the face. "I... I don't know what's going on with you! I don't know why you're here! I don't know how you could even be here! Don't get me wrong, I'm glad you are, but... I-I don't even think you're actually dead!"

"Dead? Moi?" said Discord. "I am a four-hundred-quintillion-year-old elemental spirit of chaos! The boundaries between life and death are about as meaningless to me as the laws of thermodynamics! I simply wanted to reassure my closest friend that I'm here for her. Is that so wrong?"

"Oh." Fluttershy turned her eyes away. She began to fidget in place, rubbing her hoof against her foreleg. "W-well, that's very nice of you, Discord, but, um... don't you think that's a little bit unfair?"

Discord raised an eyebrow. "Unfair? What do you mean?"

"W-well, it's just... as far as I'm aware, nopony else is capable traveling to the Elysium whenever they want," said Fluttershy. "My friends are probably devastated that I'm gone, and it must be very hurtful for them to think that they won't see me alive again. I'd hate for them to be jealous that you're able to come here and visit me when they can't."

Discord placed a finger to his chin. "Hmm... I hadn't quite thought of it like that. Are you absolutely sure you don't want me to visit you every now and then?"

"Um..." said Fluttershy. "Well, maybe not right now. But I'd love for you to visit once all my friends are here with me, so they wouldn't feel left out. Given how long you've lived, I'm sure it won't be much of a wait for you."

"Well, I'll admit I'll miss getting to see you every week," said Discord. "But I suppose it wouldn't be too much trouble to wait just a little while longer before visiting you again. Oh! And speaking of waiting..." Discord pulled back the skin on his right arm, revealing his bones underneath. Wrapped around his wristbone was a small golden wristwatch, with a picture of himself on the face pointing to the appropriate time. "...It looks like it's almost time for me to attend your funeral. Don't worry, I'll be sure to put on a sad face so I don't offend anyone. Toodles!"

There was one last flash of light, and Discord vanished from the Elysium. Fluttershy looked around, and exchanged a frazzled look with both of her hosts. Finally, she let out a deep sigh.

"...Do you have any cider?"