Goldenpie

“Are you sure it’s empty!” Twilight asked in panic.

“Yes Twilight.” Starlight answered irritatingly for the hundredth time.

“But are you really, really, reeeeeeeeealy sure!” Twilights mane had started getting a raggedy look. Her white teeth jutted out in a crazy manner. Starlight sighed inside the movie.

“Yes Twilight. We’ve been looking all around the base. There is nopony here!” Starlight insisted that the antenna installation in Cuba was empty.

Twilight started shaking her head.

“No. no. no. It doesn't make any sense!”

“But can’t you just destroy the antenna now?” Apple Jack made her input.

“Yes. Yes. Good point.” Twilight wavered her hoof in a ‘point taken’ manner. She then transmitted to Starlight the crazy version. “But Starlight, can't you just destroy the antenna now!?”

Starlight frowned inside the movie.

“Twilight, think. If there’s nopony here then the chances are pretty high that Ourumov might have found another antenna someplace else. In fact, how do we even know that he plans to fire the Goldeneye? Wasn’t that what the Janus group planned? How do we know that Ourumov is planning the same thing?"

Pinkie Pie was in the next room. She heard everything that Starlight said. She looked down at her PPK pistol. She still remembered the faces of all those humans that she killed. But thanks to Starlight Glimmer she also knew that she was still the same Pinkie Pie that she was when she left ponyville, despite all the bad things that she had done. Still, without that other Pinkie Pie they would never have escaped that interrogation room. She raised her ears and listened to the arguments next room.

Pinkie Pie picked up her PPK pistol. She placed it in the sheet around her belly. No, it wasn’t going to do. She admired her friends help. But she was 007 now, and if there’d ever be any hope of her and Starlight getting back to Equestria she would have to become two ponies. She also didn’t care what M said, if it hadn’t been for her silliness at the train Trixie would still be alive and they would all be home in ponyville. This was all her fault and she was the pony that would have to sort this out. The only pony that was out of context here was the pony that threw the chopper pilot out of the chopper, that pony named Pinkiemon Pie.

That pony she would never become again.

Starlight heard the door beside her open. She saw Pinkie Pie walk by without looking at her. Pinkie Pie opened the exit to the cottage they had taken residence in, the light outside patching through her curly hair.

“Where are you going Pinkie?” Starlight asked.

Pinkie Pie turned her head and looked sideways at Starlight.

“To find the Goldeneye, to find out what Ourumov plans to do with it and stop it.” She answered.

Back in Equestria the TV screen went black.

“What happened?” Fluttershy asked.

The image returned again. It now showed an overview of some kind of mansion, security guards surrounding it. A text showed up at the bottom of the screen. The text read in capital letters. ‘ONE YEAR LATER.’

Twilight paused the tape. The others saw Twilight sitting still in front of the TV screen. Slowly, she rose up on her four hooves, her lavender alicorn body silhouetted in front of it.

“Eh, Twilight?” Apple Jack asked.

Twilight wailed her head around. Her raggedy mane pointed straight upward. Her crazy eyes had hard pupils. There were the sound of a spring bouncing.

“Well, hello there fillies and gentle colts!” She said with her teeth jutting out of her mouth.

The faces of the others formed somewhere between disbelief and sadness as twilight started walking around in front of the TV, pretending to have a session.

“We’ve all ben gathered here today to watch us a movie. What movie you may ask? Well, it’s all part of our study into the topic How To Get Things Right. Now, as a volunteer to this deep diving endeavor i have my lovely student Starlight Glimmer and her lovely friend Trixie.”

Twilight flung her head around and placed her hoof underneath her mouth.

“What’s that? Trixie is dead? Well, i guess we’ll have to take my party planner instead. Starlight, would you be so kind and drag her along? Thank you Starlight. I’m so glad that you’re following the advice of your teacher.”

Twilights sarcasm and crazy talk sounded no different from one another.

“Now, as far as the experiment goes it have been a HUGE success. It all started with James Bond getting stuck on a wire, bouncing up and down turning into a porcupine. Since then he has been growling and barking all day with saliva flying through the air so i had my party planner Pinkie Pie put him out of his misery. Thank you Pinkie Pie.”

Twilight stopped in front of the TV. Her raggedy mane formed into a shadow that looked like a porcupine.

“And now we have entered the interesting part of the experiment were my party planner gets blamed for the murder of a cake hunting defense minister, chased by a crazy general accompanied by a mad lady with tight leather clothes and receiving a new job as a secret agent lead by a dried out vegetable. Now, does anypony have any questions?”

There were only awkward silence.

“Yes. Fluttershy, good question. What happens now? I’ll tell you that happens. What happens now is that my party planner is going to have to chase all these crazy humans down, all while the movie decides to jump years into the future, giving my party planner and my student ample time to BANG each other while I'm stuck here waiting for them to return as old mares after...”

Twilight flinched.

“Excuse me for a moment.” She said and trotted out to the balcony.

The loom of the sunlight sent flashing lines against the silvery Aston Martin. The small car sailed gently through the small streets of London. Neatly it parked itself beside the stone wall surrounding the Russian embassy. The inside of the car had vanilla colored seats and a dark base color with the occasional silvery button. Now, a modern designer might call this enough, but sometimes one might have the need for something more daring.

There was a pink hoof pressing the silvery button. A part of the vanilla interior next to the gear lever turned. It revealed a tv screen. A woman voice gave the driver context.

“Good evening 007, M here. 25 hours ago we’ve received reports about a former Russian hacker staying at the Russian embassy in London. The hacker is believed to be in possession of extremely sensitive information that neither the Russian nor the British government is aware of. Your mission is to find out who this hacker is and find out if he or she is willing to share their information with us. We don’t know his real name, but reports suggests that he might be using the codename Gerard Monterou. Use extreme caution ms Pie. This hacker is believed to be under grave threat given the kind of information he has. And please, try and be discreet on this one ms Pie.” M paused, then empathized. ”Try to keep your hair in check. M out.”

The pink hoof reached out into the hand compartment. It brought out an electric hair styler.

Boris Grishenko looked nervously around the lobby of the Russian embassy. His nerdy glasses sent shimmering lights about. The woman said she would meet him there, but where was she?

“Excuse me?” A woman voice said.

“Huh!” Boris heart jumped. He wailed his head around. The woman was in her late 20s. She had red lipstick. Her red hair hanged beautifully at the side of her head. Her eye brows had black mascara. She wore a dark blue dress.

"Are you mr handsome?" The woman asked the raggedy haired, straight faced, big mouthed, pointy nosed and dent skinned computer hacker.

"Wherever your sun shine." Boris said the code word in his thick Russian accent and smiled.

The woman looked blankly at the man she now knew was Boris, as if she was trying to swallow this situation.

"Right. Follow me."

The woman led Boris up some stairs. Boris watched her from behind. He straightened his glasses, believing that would help.

"So, do you work here?"

The woman didn't look back. Boris considered it a challenge.

"Have you ever been to Paris?" Boris retried.

The woman kept on walking, her short dress waving beneath her behind.

"You know? Iv'e been to Paris. They say it's the city of love."

The only answer sounding were the woman’s high heels on the hard floor. Boris looked down at the floor and smiled to himself. When he looked up he saw a big door opening in front of the woman to her left. She walked in, a man in a black suit were holding the door. Boris figured he'd get a second chance with her i there.

As Boris walked into the room he saw a big presence in the middle.

"Hi Boris!" Valentin Zukovsky boomed and smiled.

Boris stared in disbelief at Valentin. He pulled himself together. He put on a smile.

"Hello Valentin. Nice to see you."

Valentin looked smiling at Boris. The smile seemed stuck in place, turning it more and more passive aggressive. Boris listened around. He heard people walking outside.

"Are you enjoying your London stay?" Boris asked politely.

Valentin looked at Boris. He studied his relaxed face and smug smile. He could just continue as normal, but this was going to be more effective the other way. He relaxed his face and put on a understanding appearance.

"Oh yes. Yes i have. Thank you for asking." Valentin answered politely.

Boris felt his muscles relax. He listened to all the people outside again.

"Please. Sit down" Valentin offered.

Boris sat down in the chair further away opposite of Valentin.

“So? How are you enjoying your stay Boris?” Valentin asked

“Good. Very good.” Boris nodded.

Valentin smiled statically at Boris. Boris grabbed his neck. He laughed nervously.

“Listen. If this is about the money, the rest is on it’s way, i can assure you.”

“Oh. No. No. No. This isn’t about the money Boris.” Valentin assured Boris. “Even though i was the one who made sure you got out of Russia, away from Ourumov, this isn’t about that.”

Boris smiled and nodded.

“So? What's this about then?” Boris asked.

Valentin made a hand motion.

"Christine?!" He called

"Yes Valley!" The red haired woman answered hoity toity.

"Get over here!" He blasted

The red haired woman came forward. She kissed Valentin on the cheek. Boris smiled at Christine. This time she smiled back. She wavered her hand.

“Boris. I want you to meet Christine. She and i were in Paris last year.” He looked at Christine. ”Where’t we dear?”

“Yes Valley.” Christine turned her head and looked at Boris, then added. “They say it’s the city of love.”

Boris laughed. Christine laughed harder. Valentin laughed the hardest.

“Tell me dear,” Valentin said while still laughing. “What did i buy you while you and i were in Paris?”

“Oh. You sweetheart! You bought me a diamond...”

“A diamond.” Valentin mirrored Christine while nodding his head.

“...this fancy new dress.”

“The new dress.” Valentine motioned her blue dress,

“...That lovely car.”

“The car.”

“...That beautiful apartment.”

There were silence.

“No i didn’t. You bought that.” Valentin said while still smiling.

“I did?” Christine asked, laughing nervously.

“Yea, with my money.” Valentins smile faded slightly.

There were awkward silence. Valentin continued.

“I borrowed you some. Don’t you remember?”

The silence festered inside the room. Christine looked nervously at Boris and around the room. Valentin smiled widely.

“But as we just said. This isn’t about the money.” Valentin said and started laughing.

The fake laughters filled the room, Christine’s being the loudest of them. Boris felt the laughter boil up inside him, Valentin is such a funny man he thought. His eyes met Valentins, who's big cheeks bent into long lines by his wide laughter.

Valentins face dropped. His eyes blackened. His big chin hanged down from his face.

“It really isn’t.” He said darkly.

There were decisive footsteps walking up behind Christine. A big man with silvery teeth bent her right arm. Christine's scream filled the room. Boris froze. His eyes widened in disbelief. He tried to stand up but was held down by two men standing behind his chair. Valentin stood up. His short legs and large body still had him towering somehow.

“Do you see Boris. I don’t need my money! We can all be friends here!” Valentin exclaimed sarcastically.

“Boris...”

Boris looked at Christine, her teary eyes begging.”

“Boris. Please, help...” Christine cried.

Valentin turned his head in a incredulous manner.

“Oh for petes sake!” Valentin said and brought up a pistol. He aimed it straight at Christine close range.

There were three loud bangs echoing the building. Christine's eyes were still looking at Boris as they froze in place. She fell face down to the floor. A puddle of blood formed under her. There were a moment of silence, Boris panicked breathing being the only thing that could be heard. The door to the room slammed opened.

“What in the bloody name is going on here...!” The man with pointy beard froze once he saw the dead woman. He looked up at Valentin. Valentin glared back at him. The man opened his mouth several times as if he was about to say something. Eventually he was able to.

“Please. Can you all just be quiet? I’m trying to have a meeting downstairs.”

Valentin smiled and nodded.

“Sure thing.” He answered.

The man looked again at the woman with sad eyes before leaving the room. Valentin walked over to Boris. He bent his knees and put his large chubby face right in front of him.

“Do you know who that was?” Valentin asked and pointed his gun at the door.

Boris shook his sweaty head.

“That was the chief of police, of London. Did you really believe that you would be safe from me outside of Russia Boris?”

Boris looked behind Valentin. The large man that held Christine’s arm smiled with his big iron teeth.

“Don’t look at Jaws! Look at me!” Valentin blasted. Boris looked at Valentin again, who now spoke with a understanding voice.

“So, you see. I hear what you say when you say ‘if this is about the money then...’. And i agree, i agree.” Valentin pointed his gun at the dead woman. “That, Boris. That was not about the money anymore. I’m never gonna to get her money now. Don’t you agree?”

Boris was shaking and sweating so hard that he could only muster a small nod. Valentin looked silently at horrified Boris. He then said understandingly.

“Shall we both agree that this IS about the money, for now?”

Boris nodded.

“Good, and i think we can both come to understanding that this will continue being about the money...” Valentin paused, letting the seriousness sink in, as if he needed to. “...Until seven days from now. huh?” Valentins eyes widened as he looked at Boris

Boris nodded again, feeling himself calm down.

“Good. Cause after that...” Valentin looked back at Christine, then at Boris again. “...it won't be.”

Boris felt his muscles relax as he was walking down the stairs, entering the lobby again. He closed his eyes, wiping the memory of Christine out of his head. It was easier this time. It had been way harder the last time, following the bloodbath at the Severnaya station.

‘Natalya...’

Boris eyebrows twitched. He shook his head. No, he had to forget about her, for his own survival. He opened his eyes. He squinted them as he caught sight of a pink pony entering the building.

'Did i drink that vodka again?' He asked himself.

The male receptionist looked bewildered at the rare sight. The pony had a pink fur. The pink mane of the pony hanged downwards from the sides of her head, curling up into hooks at the end. Her short tail hanged also, barely touching the ground. She had a pink tailored suit over her back and forelegs. Her back moved slightly back an forth sexily as her hooves sent echoes through the lobby. Despite being a pony her blue eyes looked suggestively at the human receptionist.

“Whats your business at the embassy?” The Russian receptionist asked curiously, somehow avoiding the question what in the name of the motherland she was. Pinkie Pie sensed the real curiosity. She answered in a slightly lowered highly pitched voice, slowly and seductively.

“I know what you’re thinking. It must be so rare for you to meet a pony.” Pinkie Pie flickered her eyebrows. “Tell me human, before i answer your question, have you ever seen a pony before?”

The receptionist was about to insist on an answer immediately, but his curiosity got the better of him.

“No, i haven't.”

“Well, there’s a first time for everything.” Pinkie Pie laid her hoof on the counter, her blue eyes leaned in closer as she looked at the human. “Tell me handsome, did you know that this is my first time here in London?”

The Equestrian ponies inside Twilights castle saw everything on the TV screen.

“Is she flirting with him?!” Rainbow Dash raised her hooves in confusion.

“This isn’t like her. She’s so seductive.” Fluttershy pointed out in bewilderment.

“This isn’t like her. She’s so fabulous!” Rarity wailed dreamily while holding her hoofs under her chin.

“Pinkie Pie?” Was all Twilight could say.

Back inside the movie the receptionist smiled. He laughed nervously.

“Well, i can’t say i knew that. Ms...”

Pinkie Pie looked confidently at the receptionist.

“The name is Pie, Pinkie Pie.”

“Pinkie Pie.” The man mirrored. “Well, what brings you to London then Ms Pie?”

“A man. Long and in his middle ages. He goes by the name of Gerard Monterou.”

Boris heard everything. His reaction did not delay. Fast as a fox he slipped out of the main door behind Pinkie Pie.

Pinkie Pie heard the man she saw when she walked into the embassy slip out of the door the moment she said Gerard Monterou. She also knew that he had a lost friend that he was trying to forget, given the signals that he sent when she walked in here. Seems like this ‘Gerard’ was a man on the run. Pinkie Pie lowered her eyebrows in sadness and continued.

“Well. Im sorry but i have to go now, your answer will have to wait. I’ll come back later. Don't go anywhere handsome.” Pinkie Pie waved her hoof. The receptionist waved back as Pinkie Pie trotted out. Unbeknownst to Pinkie Pie there was a man in the corner. He picked up a walkie talkie.

Valentin and his men was on their way getting rid of the woman body. Valentin listened to what his lookout said through his walkie talkie. The more his man talked the more incredulous Valentin got.

“Well?! Don’t just stand there! Gather the men and go ahead and deal with it!” The skin on Valentins face shook as he talked. After the call had ended Valentin turned to Jaws. He pointed his finger at him.

“I got a job for you.” He said firmly.

Jaws face dropped in disappointment. So far this half as tall mob boss had barely given him anything useful to do.

“How would you like to squeeze a pink pony?!” Valentins eyes widened as he squeezed his walkie talkie so that it made cracking sounds

Jaws disappointed face quickly broadened into a wide smile of steel and industry. He loved ponies.

Pinkie Pie saw the man get into a cab further ahead. Quickly she made her way to her Aston Martin one street away. She used the hoof specialized handle to open the car door. Once inside she pressed a slivery button.

“Starlight?!” Pinkie Pie called.

“Pinkie Pie!” Starlight answered from MI6 headquarters.

“Starlight, I'm going to need some feedback on the cab traffic!” Pinkie Pie said and gave Starlight the cabs license number.

“I’m on it Pinkie.” Starlight answered.

Back at MI6 headquarters Starlight Glimmer the unicorn was sitting on a round rotating chair. Around her she had twelve different computer screens, all with their own hard drive. Starlight Glimmer spun her round chair around. Her horn lit up as she was using her horn magic to write commands into the hard drives remotely. Starlight Glimmers tongue hung out as she concentrated.

“Aaaaand. Got it! Alright Pinkie, i got feedback!” Starlight gave Pinkie Pie the location of the cab.

Boris took seat inside the fancy Greek restaurant.

He looked around. The restaurant building itself was square formed. A Roofless garden laid in the middle of it, filled with trees and flowers, a water stream was running through it with small bridges. In the corner of the garden there was a copy of the greek statute Discobolus. The garden could easily be entered by the diners downstairs thanks to the big oval openings to the sides. Boris couldn’t see that anyone would have been able following him.

“Can i take your order miss?” The waiter walked up to Boris. Boris looked at him in bewilderment.

“But I'm not a...”

“I’ll just have a coffee please.” A highly pitched female voice ordered beside Boris. Boris wailed his head around. The pink pony was looking down at the menu as she was talking to him.

“You know, not that many hackers like yourself carry around that much heartache.” The pony said confidently.

“Sir?” The waiter asked Boris. Boris turned to the waiter.

“Just coffee for me thanks.” Boris ordered quickly before turning to the pony again. The long pink mane covered half of her face.

“Listen. I don’t know who or what you are. But i am just a...” Boris was interrupted.

“Just a normal guy having meetings with Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky inside the Russian embassy under false name while running from a home where you left your loved ones behind. Look on the bright side, at least your decision to order coffee was all day, ‘Gerard’.”

“Who are...”

“I’m from the British secret service. My name is Pinkie Pie. But you are not ‘Gerard’, unless you like that name and prefer to keep it. But that won't help you if you don’t have friends.” Pinkie Pie turned her face and looked at him.

“What do you mean? I have friends...” Boris was interrupted again.

“In Russia. But not here, and not while in this pickle that you’re in.” Pinkie Pie softened her voice. “Listen, i know that you see Valentin as your friend, and maybe he is.”

“He is.” Boris said aggressively, letting slip that he’s indeed been in contact with Valentin.

Pinkie Pie looked back at her menu again.

“Good. Then, come back to me again when you’ve convinced your friend to stop being the most powerful mobster in Russia that you owe favors to, probably money. Tell me ‘Gerard’. You are a man on the run from people within your own government. Have you ever wondered what will happen after you’ve payed Valentin what you owe him? Have you ever wondered what will happen if someone within his giant organization let slip that he’s been in contact with you?”

“You know nothing about that.” Boris pointed out.

“No, i don’t, and neither will the guy waiting outside your apartment with a silencer.” Pinkie Pie looked up from her menu again, her flattened hair wavered as she turned pink head. ”I am an agent in her majesties secret service and I am your friend. Let me help you!” She exclaimed silently while looking at Boris with begging eyes.

“Mr and Ms?” The waiter came back with the coffee. He brought out a small note and pencil. “Would you like some cake on the house also?” The waiter asked.

There was a small hissing sound. Pinkie Pies confident smile was stuck in position as it intensified.

“What did you say?” She asked.

“Some cake Ms. Would you like some?”

The hissing sound became louder and louder. Pinkie Pies confident face slowly raised itself. Suddenly there were the sound of confetti exploding. Pinkie Pies straight mane puffed up into full Pinkie curliness, the surprised faces of Boris and the waiter buried somewhere behind it.

Jaws slam opened the door to the restaurant. His ironed face dropped in disbelief as he was greeted with flying confetti and half eaten birthday cakes. Around him every worker and diner were having the time of their lives. The waiter laughed widely as he was playing pin the tail on the pony in full waiter regalia. Jaws saw a minister blow a party horn, his old head covered in confetti as he smiled. On the restaurant floor oversized state women and men were dancing to a ditty electric tune. One after one the chefs of the restaurant brought out cake after cake, smiling widely all the way.

Jaws looked straight forward toward the garden. A big multi level party cake had been placed in the middle of it. Further ahead the Discobolus statue was throwing his frisbee unbothered like he always had done for the last 2000 years. Bewildered Jaws walked inside the garden. There were the sound of a cannon firing. A huge swarm of confetti and party regalia flew past his face, followed by a pink face.

“SURPRISE!” The pink pony blasted.


Jaws grunted. His lips bent in bewilderment whilst his iron teeth remained hard. The Pink pony was jumping happily up and down in front of him. She was talking fast with a highly pitched voice.

“I’m so glad that you could make it here whoever you are. Now let me guess, is it Iron Teeth? Iron Man? Long Leg? Bright Smile? Sun Tower? Oval Steps? Mountain Climb? Shorty? Harry...?”

The pink pony was spewing Equestrian names faster and faster. She sounded almost like a tape recorder in fast forward.

Jaws pulled his strong arm backwards. He thrusted it forward and punched the jittering spectacle whilst it was still smiling. The speeding tape recorder was abruptly cut with a short, highly pitched “hoaa!”. The pink pony went sailing through the air like a doll.

At the upper floor the rest of the dining guests were still eating like nothing was happening. There were the sound of something slamming into the window. The guests turned their heads and stared blankly at the flattened pink face outside.

“Whie!” The flattened face greeted before sliding down.

Jaws grunted and flung his heavy arms around like a colossus. The pink party pony was jumping around so fast that he missed every time. The smiling pink face kept flashing before his eyes, her constant talking fading in and out as well.

“Aren’y you exited...That makes me exited...I haven't seen you before...Taste the cake...Whats it like with those teeth?...” That last phrase had a bewildered face attached to it.

Jaws kept throwing his punches. His stiff movements created an image of his right arm bending downward after a punch, his left arm pointing straight backward, his long stiff body standing straight with his upper body bending slightly. Beside Jaws the ancient Discobolus statue were throwing his frisbee in the exact same manner. The curly hair made out of white stone laid still above the statuettes sad face.

Jaws stepped on the cake plate lying on the ground. The cake went rocketing up, smearing his face white.

“I see you tasted my...Isn’t it delicious...”

The cake landed on the ground. Blinded by the cream Jaws stepped on it. His giant body went sliding on one foot, his white face making him look like Santa Claus with teeth holders. Jaws foot jammed under one of the tiny bridges above the water stream. Jaws fell forward. He hit his head on the stone pavement and passed out. The ancient Discobolus was looking down at him from above with sad, sympathetic eyes.

“Come on everypony! There’s cakes for everyone!” Pinkie Pie shouted. At that same moment there were a cascade of gun blasts coming from the entrance.

Discobolus neck was hit with a bullet. Jaws woke up just to se Discobolus white sad face fall toward him. It hit him in the head. He then passed out again.

Pinkie Pie threw herself behind the statue. She poked her party face out.

“Sure you don’t want some as...!?” Pinkie Pie was interrupted as the bullets hit the side of the statue.

Pinkie Pie leaned herself against the statue as she took cover behind it. She heard the sound of stone breaking and screaming party guests fleeing as Valentins henchmen fired their guns. Pinkie Pie closed her eyes, her party smile staying in place. Slowly her fluffed up curly mane descended. The mane was still curly once it hanged limply at the sides of her head. Her party smiled changed slightly into to a serious grin. She opened her eyes, revealing a hardened blackness inside them.

“If that’s the party you want....” She mumbled darkly.

Pinkie Pie thrusted her front hoof forward, raising it slightly upward in a specific way. Out of the sleeve of her pink dress a contraption pushed out Pinkie Pies ten round PPK pistol. It turned at the end and placed it neatly in her right hoof before pulling back inside her dress.

Behind the statue one of Valentins henchmen had walked up into the middle of the garden, believing that this silly party pony can't be that dangerous.

Pinkie Pie wailed out of cover. She placed one round straight into the heart of the henchman. He screamed and fell sideways. The large white party cake behind him splattered with blood.

“Kill her! Kill her!” One of the henchmen screamed as they defiled what was left of the poor replica statue.

The frisbee arm of the statue was hit, sending the stone frisbee tumbling onto the pavement. Pinkie Pie looked at it. After a second of thinking she picked it up. She fastened a small bomb at it. She stood up on two hooves and threw the frisbee like it was meant to in ancient times.

Once the frisbee was in the middle above the garden she pressed a small button on her hoof watch. The frisbee exploded mid air, causing a huge cloud of stone powder to form all over the place. There were the sound of henchmen coughing.

Still behind the statue Pinkie Pie thrusted her right hoof forward, causing the pistol contraption to re appear. All that Pinkie Pie needed to do was to let go of her PPK pistol and the contraption pulled it right back underneath the sleeve of her dress again. She thrusted her left hoof forward, revealing a grappling hook in the same kind of contraption.

Pinkie Pie aimed upward, felling herself rise into the air after firing. She kicked the window in as she sailed into the upper floor of the restaurant. She could hear henchmen shouting below.

“Where is she? Where did she go?”

Pinkie Pie made a roll on the wooden floor, catching a glimpse of all the horrified humans hiding underneath the tables. A presence rounded the corner ahead.

“Look. There she is!” The man shouted and pointed his gun at her. He fired, the bullet going for her neck. Pinkie Pie moved her head sideways as she used her pinkie sense to doge it. In the same moment her PPK contraption had already delivered her fire arm.

“GAAAH!” The henchmen screamed as Pinkie Pie sent a bullet straight into his heart. Three more henchmen arrived and started filling the corridor with bullets. Pinkie Pie hid behind a wooden pillar.

“Come on guys! Kill her!” Pinkie Pie heard them shout as the pillar behind her diminished with bullets.

Pinkie Pie hid her pistol and equipped her grappling hook again. She wailed out of cover. She fired the grappling hook at one of the Henchmen, causing it to get stuck in his clothes. She galloped across the floor, hearing the bullets pass her before throwing herself out the window leading to the outside. She heard the henchman scream above as he was pulled against the window. She adjusted the grappling hook, allowing her to smash the window downstairs.

She released the rope through a very specific turning motion with her hoof. This took the two henchmen downstairs completely by surprise since they believed she was upstairs. She put two rounds in the chest of the first one. She threw herself forward as the second one fired at her. She fired three rounds in the air, two missed and one hit him in the chest.

The three henchmen left descended the stairs. One of them had grabbed a 13 year old human girl as a hostage.

Pinkie Pie heard the crying of the young human child as she was hanging above the ceiling in her grappling hook. She reminded herself that she had only three bullets left in her ten round PPK.

Pinkie Pie closed her eyes. She sensed the bullets path inside her mind. She released her grappling hook, landing in-between the henchman with the hostage and the two up front.

One of the henchmen up front fired in panic toward Pinkie Pie. She moved and let his bullet hit the hostage holder in the arm, causing him to stagger and release the human child.

Pinkie Pie fired two bullets, both through the hearts of the henchmen up front. Just as the hostage holder wailed his gun around Pinkie Pie sent her last PPK round through his lounges.

“AAAAH!” The man exclaimed before hitting the floor.

The girl went running to Pinkie Pie. Pinkie Pie heard the moaning of the last henchmen together with the crying of the human girl who had wrapped her arms around Pinkie Pies mane.

All around her the complete restaurant silence was only broken with the crying of the human child along with all the civilians in hiding. At least that was something, given the fact that her objective, the hacker, was nowhere to be seen.

Pinkie Pie lowered her pink head over the sink. She flung water all over her face, feeling its cold touch try to reach her troubled mind. The water went running down into the sink, just like the water in that greek restaurant garden ran when...

Pinkie Pie shut her blue eyes between her limply hanging pink hair. She shook her head as she blocked the memory. She breathed heavily as she looked into the bathroom mirror. In the mirror she saw a face, a face far away from the party pony that she knew she still was.

But why didn’t it help knowing this? Why did Pinkie Pie, once again, feel the panic rise within her. Was she finally about to lose her mind? Was she about to become that MI6 agent that went A-wall, the one that went insane? Pinkies eyes went dim as the last question hit her in the head.

‘Am i becoming Pinkiemon Pie?’

Pinkie Pie took another hoof full of water and tossed it all over her face. It still didn’t help. She could still hear the scream of the man she shot in the stomach. She could see the blood of the man she shoot through the heart smeared all over that large party cake.
The image reformed in her mind into an image of her friends standing in Sugarcube Corner. They all looked disappointed at her with frowned faces. Behind them was a large cake covered in blood. Spike was eating part of it. Was it her friends blood? That man...?

‘I’m not a real friend anymore...’



As the last thought hit Pinkie Pie in the head she felt everything that she had ever lived for slip away. It left only a dark hole behind, a dark hole of screams and blood and happy memories twisted into bad ones. Pinkie Pie breathed more and more heavily. She felt herself grow dizzy. Her eyes started wailing around the bathroom.

All those good memories from Ponyville was gone. All that she could se around her was that colorless clinker floor. That hard sink. That tasteless water. That mirror that showed the image of herself, making her the only pony around. She only had herself. She was alone in the entire world.

Pinkie Pie turned her head downward. She screamed into the sink with her mouth closed, her screams subduing inside the small bathroom located in her and Starlights apartment in London. She screamed over and over and over again.

She screamed away the faces of the people that she killed only a second later, but she couldn’t scream back her friends happy faces. Tears filled her eyes. She crumbled down into the shower beside the sink and started crying uncontrollably.

Starlight Glimmer used the key to get inside their apartment even though she could easily just have used her magic to turn the lock inside the door mechanism. Or, duh, teleport herself, as Trixie would have expressed it.

‘Trixie...’

Starlight close her eyes. She still missed her best friend in the world. She knew that she would be waiting for her in Equestria if they managed to reverse the spell that brought them into the movie. But knowing that didn’t ease her longing.

It was now that Starlight heard the crying inside the bathroom. At first she raised her head in bewilderment. But as she heard who it was she immediately knew why.

The tears were running down the thumping party pony turned MI6 agent’s cheeks as she hid her face beneath her hooves. Starlight entered the bathroom. She looked with a sad face at the crumbled piece of pink inside the shower. She entered the shower. She sat down beside Pinkie Pie and folded her hooves around her.



 “...h...h..h..Starlight...h” Pinkie Pie sobbed.

Starlights horn lit up. She turned the valve above them. The shower started pouring water over their manes. She turned the temperature valve to warm. As the water heated up she started swaying her sobbing pink friend back and forth.

“So, so, so Pinkie Pie. There, there. It will be alright. I’m here.”

“...h..h...Starlight...i can't remember...h....h....I can't remember them.” Pinkie Pie sobbed.

“Sssh, shhh, so, so. Remember who Pinkie?” Starlight asked comforting.

“h...h...My friends.” Pinkie Pie sobbed with a piping voice.

“So, so Pinkie. Your friends is all waiting for you home in Equestria.”

“...h...h...What friends? I don't have any friends!” Pinkie Pie wailed, contradicting herself.

Starlight waved her crying friend back and forth for a while, calming her down slightly before answering softly.

“Yes you have. You have Twilight, you have Fluttershy, you have Apple Jack, you have Rainbow Dash, you have Rarity. All of them is waiting for you to come home. We only need to sort this mess out so that we can reverse this foolish spell of mine that brought us here.” Starlight said the last part about herself with a tinge of scolding.

Pinkie Pie imagined getting home to Equestria again. She thought she saw herself meeting her friends again. At first it actually looked like them but the image slowly reformed into the face of that man. She imagined herself inviting him to a party in Equestria, but instead she... Pinkie Pie felt the crying boil up again. What had she become?

“Starlight...h...h... I can see him. I can see his face!” She wailed

Starlight Glimmer thought back on the last year they spent living inside this movie. She remembered the other times they had this same discussion. She knew immediately what ‘him’ was all about.

“Yes Pinkie. I know you can, but you only did what you had to do. You heard what M said about when these things happen. It’s on MI6 what happened to him, you only followed orders.”

“I am...” Pinkie Pies face widened in horror. “Pinkiemon Pie.”

Starlight raised her head. She pulled up Pinkies head with her hoof, having her own eyes meet her teary eyes. Starlight smiled.

“Hello Pinkie Pie.” She greeted.

“...h...h...I am?”

“Yes you are, and you have always been... The most funny, happy, smiling and uplifting pony that i’ve ever known. Long ago i thought i knew what smiling was. I thought that all you needed to do was to raise your mouth and show your teeth, until you came into my village and showed me how to smile from the inside.”

“But Pinkiemon...” Pinkie Pie blurted.

“Pinkie Pie, look at me, look at my smile.” Starlight urged.

Pinkie Pie studied Starlights smile. It was a smile that came from pure joy of seeing the pony you care about.

“It’s a good smile.” Pinkie Pie concluded with a broken voice. Starlights smiling mouth then opened and asked the question.

“Would Pinkiemon be able to tell the difference?”

Pinkie Pie felt her sobbing stop. Even though her mouth remained dropped she felt a smile form inside her. Pinkiemon Pie was gone.

“Oh Starlight.” Pinkie Pie cried and wrapped her hooves around Starlight and buried her face inside her mane.” Starlight, what would i do without you?”

Suddenly another horrifying thought festered itself inside Pinkies head. She felt the crying boil up again.

“But Starlight. What if my friends won't recognize me?” Pinkie Pie started sobbing again. “What if i’ll never be a party pony ever again?”

“You have a difficult job Pinkie Pie. Being a MI6 agent must be hard, but thats only temporarily. Trust me Pinkie, you WILL be that pony again once we return. And when we do we will all be having a big party together.”

Pinkie Pie breathed her sobs as an answer. She eventually managed.

“A party?”

“Yes, a party.” Starlight answered softly. “...And all of us will be there. Right there, at Sugarcube Corner. We will have a big cake. Trixie will be there.” Starlight Glimmer leaned her mouth close to Pinkies ear. “...I will be there.”

“And I will!” A voice exclaimed inside Starlight Glimmers head. Starlights face lit up.

“Twilight?” A huge smile formed on her face. “Twilight! Its really you?!"

Back in Equestria Twilight was sitting in front of the TV with tears in her eyes. Behind her she had her friends doing the same. Starlight continued inside the movie.

“Let me guess, there's been a time jump in the movie.” Starlight was still smiling as she talked.

“Yes. One year.” Twilight informed. “For us it only took a second, but for you... I wish i was there, i really do.”

“I know you do Twilight. But its probably better if...” Twilight interrupted Starlight.

“Starlight?”

“Yes?”

“Starlight, can i talk to her?” Twilight asked. Starlights horn lit up. She re-casted the transmission spell to Pinkie Pie.

“Sure Twilight.” Starlight obliged. Twilight then spoke softly to her party pony inside the movie.

“Pinkie Pie.” Twilight began softly.

Pinkie Pie didn’t say anything. Her sobbing continued.

“Pinkie Pie, do you remember Alec Trevelyan?”

“...h...Yes.” Pinkie Pie was able.

“Do you remember what you said to him when you met him at Severnaya?”

Pinkie Pie didn’t answer. She raised her teary face as she seemed to think. Twilight continued.



 “...Cause i do. You were talking to him in the snow blizzard. You said ‘Hi there, my name is Pinkie Pie. Nice to finally meet you again.’

“h...h...You do?” Pinkie Pie piped.

“Yes, i do. We all do. We all do because we all saw you, right here on the TV screen in Equestria.”

“..h...You did.” Pinkie Pie told herself.

“Yes we did. And we have all been with you all the way. Me and the rest of my friends. In fact, lets se if i can't...”

Twilights horn gave a glow in Equestria. She widened her transmission spell. She then spoke to the movie goers.

“Say hi to Pinkie Pie ponies.”

“Hi Pinkie.” Fluttershy greeted.

Pinkie Pie raised her teary head. Her eyebrows lowered in disbelief.

“Fluttershy?”

“Hello Pinkie Pie.” Rarity took over. “I really adore your dress. Who made it for you?”

“A guy called Q.” Pinkie Pie answered. “Hello Rarity. Are you all there?”

There was a unison answer among the movie goers.

“Yes!”

A smile started forming underneath Pinkie Pies teary eyes.

“Howdy partner.” Apple Jack greeted.

“Hello Pinkie!” Rainbow Dash blasted.

“We are all here Pinkie Pie. In fact, there are more than just us ponies here. Isn’t that right guys?” Twilight turned to the none ponies in the room.

“Hello Pinkie Pie. Nice to see you again!” Littlefoot exclaimed whilst poking his long neck through Twilights window.

“Littlefoot!? Are you there to?” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, becoming less and less sad by the second.

“Hello Pinkie Pie!” Ash Ketchum blasted “Team Rocket says hello! They miss you. But at least we are here. Isn’t that right Pikachu?”

“Pika!” Pikachu exclaimed.

“Ask Ketchum?!” Pinkie Pie said incredulously. A large smile started to form on her face. A low voice rumbled Twilights transmission.

“Hello Pinkie Pie.” Peter Dinklage greeted.



 “Peter?!” Pinkie Pie said. A huge smile had festered on her face. Her eyes now cried tears of joy instead of sadness. Peter continued.

“You owe me a rematch Pinkie Pie on that Game Of Thrones board game. I almost had you last time.” Peter Dinklage said. A raspy voice took over.

“Pinkie Pie. You... are... AWSOME! I didn't know you were such a badass!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed while raising her wings.

“But i killed those people.” Pinkie Pie pointed out weakly.

“What are you talking about!? You SAVED a little girl! You SAVED an entire restaurant! Those guys had it coming.” Rainbow Dash exclaimed cocky.

“Rainbow Dash!” Rarity scolded.

“But it’s the truth! Pinkie Pie didn’t choose to become an MI6 agent. What were she supposed to do, let them just kill her!?”

“But i did choose.” Pinkie Pie said weakly.

The silence laid itself. Pinkie Pie continued.

“If it hadn’t been for my silliness the movie would have been back on track long ago and Starlight would have been able to send us back way earlier. And Trixie...” 



Pinkie Pie paused, letting the sadness about Starlights best friend sink in. “...She would still be alive. I know that killing James Bond later was an accident, but the movie still choose me. I must be the one to finish...”

“No Pinkie Pie.” Twilight interrupted, she then spoke passionately with a strong voice. “...We will! I know that there’s a lot of pressure on you alone, but from now on we will help you all the way. We promise! We will help you both make it to the end of this movie. And after that we will have that party, right here in Ponyville!”

There was a unison mumble of approval among the individuals inside and outside the movie.

“And then we can leave you two to it!” Ash Ketchum blasted without thinking. There were the sound of electricity running when Pikachu gave him a jolt.

“Ao!” He exclaimed.

"Pika!" Pikachu scolded

Pinkie Pie and Starlight Glimmer blushed inside the movie. There then were the sound of a door knocking.

“Who could that be?” Pinkie Pie asked bewildered while looking at Starlight. Starlights voice grew dark.

“I don't know.”

Starlight got up. She opened a drawer outside the hallway and brought out a pistol. She walked to the door and opened it halfway, hiding the pistol behind it.

“Yes?!” She asked.

“It’s me.”

“Who are you?!”

Starlight had never heard Boris voice before. She raised her pistol behind the door. Pinkie Pie trotted into the hallway.

“Gerard?” She asked confounded.

Starlight and Pinkie Pie opened the door. Boris Grishenko had his face turned down. He spoke as he raised it. His eyes looked serious at the ponies.

“I will help you find the Goldeneye and kill Ourumov.”