Falling for Ponies - Secret Agent Man
Farewell Ponies
Previous ChapterStill Day 51
You roll the marble like things around in your hands, the fate of all pony kind apparently resting on them... God help you if you drop them.
"So.... These are the 'Elements of Harmony'."
Celestia nods.
"Yes, in their most complete and utter base forms, almost entirely devoid of magic thanks to the cataclysm of our homeland... They were once items of great power, used for a variety of things... Luna and I, once realizing how weakly magic resonated on this world, immediately began undertaking a mission to find them... They are of the utmost importance to our plan, simply due to the fact that they can hold immense loads of magic within them... We will need all the magical power we can possibly get in order to recreate the spells that formed our realm in the first place..."
Along with the other ponies, sans Sugar Kisses who has decided to take a nap, you listen with rapt attention. You've been pretending to follow what they've been telling you about the history of these things for the past ten minutes. The ability they had to either banish or turn to stone any threat seems pretty overpowered.
Celestia sighs as she regards Sugar Kisses.
"I wish I were as confident in our plan... My little ponies never cease to amaze in their regard for us humble Princesses..."
You resist rolling your eyes as the pony in question snorts in its sleep.
"Right, so, the plan?"
"Ah yes, well, we need to charge the Elements up with an abundance of magic, but to do so, we'll need to, or more precisely, you'll need to, go on a small journey."
At this, Luna pipes up.
"Sister prithee. I very much bethink not we can trusteth the future of our entire species and the many others of our world to this perverted ape."
Celestia's eyebrow raises.
"Oh really? And would you be able to do what's necessary to flood the Elements with magic? Could you, even?"
Luna somewhat screws up her face in irritation, before letting out a 'humph' and quickly averting her gaze.
Celestia sighs and shakes her head.
"But I'm afraid we are far from that stage in our plan. The Elements of Harmony were one thing, we used up the final reserves of our magic to find them, and are now as weakly able to wield spells as any other pony while on this magic depleted world... But this next item may prove to be a nightmare to track down... Anon, we pray you'll help us, to use every resource at your disposal to be able to find it... It will most likely take years, decades even, an entire lifetime, but no matter how long the search, no matter what nefarious beings may hold it, we must never waver, or all is lost... We seek a mirror, the thick frame of which is purple and jewel-encrusted, in the shape of a giant horseshoe. It stands on a plinth with-"
"Oh does it have like, a picture of a pony reared up on its hind legs on top of it? Yeah I think we picked that up a few days after reports of magical creature sightings started popping up at insane rates. Do you... Want me to go get it?" You ask the now stunned visage of the big white Princess.
"Oh... Well, yes, thank you."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You step up to the currently locked, twenty foot tall steel doors that lead to an almost endless room, that houses most of all the various clothing, weapons, artifacts, and doodads of power in the world, otherwise known as 'The Warehouse'.
The girls were worried about you gaining access to, and taking out an item of such magical significance without being at the very least questioned, or more likely, outright stopped, dragged off, interrogated, and subsequently imprisoned for the rest of your life.
You assured them it would all be okay, that no matter what, if all the horrors of the world stood in your way, nothing would stop you from getting something so important to them.
You press and hold a button on the intercom system by the doors.
"Hey Ted."
You wave to a camera.
"Hey Anon."
"Can I come in?"
"Yeah alright."
The next second, those massive steel doors start to slide open, to reveal a pure slab of titanium, that lowers down into the floor, followed by a block of osmium, which is pulled up through the ceiling, to unveil an iron gate with bars like fence posts that slowly swings open.
You have to take five steps just to make your way through the now open doorway, the metal of each barrier so thick, each one like a heavy duty bank vault.
Once through, you look to the side, where Ted and Buddy usually are. The area they've appropriated has a couch, TV, fridge, ps4... As well as the more obvious things to do their jobs, like a wall of cameras, a desk to look professional, and several types of forklift truck.
The rest of the giant expanse of concrete floored land is made up of crates, shelves, crates, shelves, and more crates. Plus smaller crates and bigger crates as well.
Apart from cataloging a new item perhaps a few times a month and then finding it a place to rest forever, they don't really do much, as evident in the state that you find them now. Buddy is wearing a pair of those big green toy Hulk gloves, while Ted is holding a replica of Thor's hammer.
"Not interrupting anything am I?"
"Nah, what do you need?"
"Big magic horseshoe mirror."
"And what do you want it for?"
"Err.... Official business?"
"Hold on..."
He moves to the desk and types on a laptop for a few seconds.
"Row 11, Stack P, Ground Level. You can take a forklift and a crowbar to check you've got the right one, I'd do it myself, but we're kind of in the middle of a reenactment here, and I can't be bothered. Such lowly tasks are fit for mortals, not the one who wields the might of, Thor!" He exclaims while raising up the hammer.
"Right, well, cool Thor Hammer, but aren't only those who are Worthy able to wield it?"
You smirk as you take hold of a crowbar.
"Oh no, Mjölnir can be held by anyone, it's only the power that's withheld if the person isn't deemed worthy."
You pause from climbing into a forklift. Well, that's just flat out not true of the comic version of Thor, you've seen the movies... Which can only mean one thing.
"That's actually the real Thor's hammer isn't it." You state more than ask.
"Well yeah but, he's a little too dead to stop me from playing with it, so who cares?"
You take a second to think about it.
"Well, don't accidentally kill yourself with it."
"Look who's talking, you're about to take this mirror thing we know almost nothing about."
You take a seat on the small truck as you ponder whether to remind them that there did use to be three of them working here until a portal 'somehow' opened up and sucked whatever the third one was called through it and into space...
Eh, they probably know what they're doing.
You drive off and head towards the eleventh row. As you Travel down it you mostly space out as there's only so much interest you can take in walls of crates stretching up close to the ceiling either side of you.
As you finally get to Stack P, you hop off and begin walking, looking at the labels on the crates sat on the ground.
"Let's see... Mask of the Reaper, no... Fountain of Doubt, no... Ark of the Covenant, AHA! Magic Mirror."
You twirl the crowbar in your hands for a moment, before cramming it into the side of the crate. Pulling down on it, nails slide out as you force the crate to open, and come face to face with yourself.
Because you're looking in a mirror.
It looks different from ho-hang on, the reflection is changing, changing to swirling pools of black, and a white shadowy mask, that begins speaking to you.
"I was the mirror, on the wall, through my mind's eye, I could see all. Now I'm the mirror, in the crate, if ye wishes to know thy fate, speak to me oh man of-"
"Sorry, wrong mirror." You press the side you just tore open back down.
"Oh please, I'll stop rhyming I swear, it's been two hundred years and-"
You drown out the noise by using a nearby hammer to hammer the nails back in, sealing the crate shut once again.
"Right... So, Memory Box, The Philosopher's Stone, ahhhhh, Horse Themed Magic Mirror."
You go through the same motions as before, this time with the added bonus of confirming that this is actually the mirror you're looking for.
You re-package it, load it up on the forklift truck, and drive it back to the entrance, where Buddy is holding his left leg, swollen to double the width of the other, bursting through his pants leg, with a reddish, purplish coloration to it, puss and blood oozing from several bloated blisters.
His face is in a similar condition.
Ted is looking at the back of a ceramic jug.
"Damnit, I thought the pictures meant it would make you super big and muscular, not make you explode...."
You cough in order to let them know you've returned, as well as to hopefully stop them from implicating you in anything too awful..
"So ah, I'm gonna borrow this forklift because uh, well, this thing is nine foot tall and made out of stone and metal..."
"WAIT!"
You wait, expecting a cry for help over Buddy, who's currently trying to breathe passed his swollen tongue.
"You need to sign that out."
He holds up a tablet and pen.
"Oh, right, sure..."
As you sign, you ask "And uh, when are these things checked by anyone other than you two?"
He takes a moment to think, while Buddy looks at his hand, palm now the width of a frying pan and splitting down the middle.
"Well, the last time anyone took anything OUT of here was about, four years ago? So, it'll probably be a couple of days before anyone checks."
"Right, well.... Good luck."
You watch as he goes back to looking over the jug, while Buddy sways on his feet...
And then you leave.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Your home now has several new additions.
The wooden panels of the crate, a magical mirror that will be the key to saving pony kind, and a pile of rubble, because the circular stone base of it was way too wide to fit through your door.
Luna's horn glows as she examines the mirror, as apparently she's all about the moon, and the mirror somehow works in tandem to the moon, but the moon they had in their world was different to yours, as it, the stars, and the sun were actually fake magical constructs to go with their entire fake realm that existed within the space between spaces of your world, and Luna has to gauge the mirror's new magical output and-
"Okay, okay, please, enough, just... Just tell me what the mirror actually is, and what I need to do."
Celestia sighs, and Twilight whimpers.
"B-but, history I've never heard of..."
You smile down to the pouting Twilight, and give her forehead a kiss.
"You can hear it in full while I'm busy with...?" You trail off, letting Celestia continue.
"Simply put, the mirror is a gateway to another world. Not a created realm within this one, but an entirely different Earth. We will need you to go there, with the Elements of Harmony. They are tied not only to the ponies that best represent them, magic, honesty, loyalty, kindness, generosity, an-"
"And throwing parties!" Pinkie yells out.
Celestia smiles. "Yes Pinkie, and throwing parties. But they are also tied to those that best represent them in this other world. These ponies perfect human counterparts."
"Wait wait wait... So, it's not just another world, it's more like an alternate universe, a universe that 'mirrors' yours, or, ours." Damn you feel smart for pointing that out.
"Correct, and it's a place where magic still flows fairly strongly... However, it wouldn't be enough for our means, and that's if the both of us were to travel there and absorb all we could... We, suspect, the portal may only have enough charge left on this world to send one being through..."
You lightly play with Twilight's and Rarity's manes.
"Okaaay... So why me?"
"Well, we need to load up the Elements with as much power as possible, via these ponies counterparts which they are tied to, with the greatest and most powerful magic of them all..."
Twilight grins happily. "Friendship!"
Celestia averts her gaze. "Ahem, perhaps a, smidgen more powerful than that..."
Rarity swoons against your side. "Ooohh looove..."
Celestia audibly swallows. "Heh, maybe the teensiest little bit more-"
"Ooh ooh ooh ooh ohh!" Pinkie waves a hoof. "Does Anon have to make the human us-es fall dreamily in love with him before giving them the sweatiest most amazingest screamiest fuck sessions the world's ever seen?!"
As all eyes slowly swivel from Pinkie, back to Celestia, the Princess bites her lower lip, clearly nervous over how you'll all take it.
"Well... Yes. The fact that you'll be so emotionally bonded to both the counterparts of two different universes should surely give quite the boost of power, on top of such an intense magic as the mesh of friendship, love, and lust."
You sit there in shocked silence.
The fate of so many lives revolves around... Your dick?
"Shucks..." AJ starts. "Ah guess if it's to save Equestria it would be okay, right?"
Fluttershy joins in. "W-well, I suppose it wouldn't really be cheating, if he was cheating on us with, well, us..."
Dashie takes a seat on your lap. "Heck you couldn't get a better guy for the job, he's gonna fuck me stupid!"
Celestia smirks. "Oh really?"
You start to blush as Dashie gets carried away.
"Oh yeah, human Dash aint gonna know what hit her. He's gonna be like 'Have you ever seen a dick this big?', and she's gonna be like 'There's no way that could even fit', and then he's gonna be all 'Oh we'll just see about that', and then they're gonna be all-" She starts moaning and grunting while slapping and mashing her front hooves together.
Celestia chuckles. "I'm sure he'll do fine. Now-Oh good, Luna, what's the verdict?"
The darker coloured, grumpier Princess trots on over. They're honestly like night and day. Oh hey, you made a second play on words, you're on a roll today.
"The verdict is we art positively sickened by the bethought of this thing copulating with aught. As for the mirror, there is just enow power to receiveth anon and the Elements through, and backeth again... 'long with perhaps another trinket... And we has't utterly nay idea how the floweth of timeth may differ between these worlds once the gateway is ope and the rapist monkey passes through."
Celestia's eyebrows furrow.
"Ah, that explains why you mentioned a 'trinket'..." She sighs, and begins trotting back and forth, pondering to herself. "Oh bother, well with all the other truths coming out, I suppose one more wouldn't hurt... We're not actually immortal."
"WHAT?!"
Ow.
Oh Christ, your poor ears...
Wait a minute, they were thought to be immortal?
"This Crown, these Shoes, this Peytral... Each of them is infused with one purpose above all... To keep the wearer ageless, undying... Immortal... Which they've been doing so for us for the past five thousand odd years."
You look in newfound awe at the royal decorations, before realizing,
"Hey hang on, why do each of you need six of them?"
Celestia shuffles in place.
"Well... I'd hate to have lost one right at the moment where I really needed to be immortal. Do you know how many times I've had my crown knocked off?"
You roll your eyes, before asking your next burning question. "But, what about, you know, immortality being a curse?"
Celestia smiles at that.
"A good reason indeed for having multiple immortality trinkets to share with your most beloved... But even more than that... If you were a married man in your thirties, and your wife died, would you simply cast off the thought of loving again until you passed as well? Of if a friend had left you, you'd never befriend another? Life is a wonderful thing, and I have not tired of it yet, even with the deaths of so, so many loved ones along the way. And when I do? I may simply remove this curse any time I choose, and live out the rest of my life naturally... Or I may even have a change of heart a few years later and reclaim immortality again before gaining my first wrinkle."
She titters.
"I'm sorry if I make it sound like I'm making light of death and don't take it seriously. But I have hundreds of lifetimes worth of experiences, and I'm afraid I cannot squash them down into a little pamphlet on why immortality is actually quite nice, nor all the reasons why my sister and I stand alone before you, void of some charming stallions or other loved ones that we surely must have bestowed these gifts to........ Now..."
As her horn lights up, followed by Luna's, their shoes, one by one lift off from their hooves, and float towards you and all the girls. The Princesses' faces show their strain as the shoes warp and shift into bands. Seven ponies have bands slide up and over their front right hooves, partway up their legs, before shrinking to fit.
Your golden band floats over your hand, and shrinks down to comfortably fit your wrist.
Celestia and Luna both pant.
"There we go... It would be a little unfair if you were to return and your special someponies had all aged to death, or if any unfortunate accidents were to befall you in your journey, what with our ultimate hopes resting on you..."
You gaze at the band on your wrist.
"I still have a few questions about immortality... But at the same time, I actually don't really care enough to ask and then listen to the answers."
Twilight's lower lip wobbles. "But... But I want to know things..."
The Princess chuckles.
"I'll tell you absolutely everything you wish to know once Anon leaves."
"So, anything I need to know about jumping through a wormhole disguised as a mirror?"
The sounds of a little purple adorkable pony gasping can be heard "That's right! What if Anon is turned into a pony on that side?"
Wut?
"Why would I-?"
Celestia looks to Luna, and Luna, shrugs.
"We art 98 percent certain yond Anon shall not beest transformed into a pony, and 87 percent sure that he will not beest transmogrified into an unholy mess."
"What?"
"Twilight Sparkle becameth a human once passing through the portal, and the lovable dragon Spike, a canine. We very much doubteth thee'll turneth into aught. And whilst there were counterparts to most all walks of life from our realm through this mirror, we predicteth there to beest only the tiniest of tiny fractions from this one."
You slump back in your seat.
"Oh........ Well as long as you're sure... Oh hell, this is all going to go wrong..." You bring a hand up to shield your eyes.
Almost as soon as you do, you feel multiple bodies moving against you.
"Hey Shugacube, what's wrong?" You feel as much as hear her soft whispering voice, her breath lightly tickling your lips.
"It... It feels like everything could go wrong... I go through the portal and it rips me apart, dead... I'm there for longer than a few days, people wonder where I am and bust in here, you guys, dead... The portal screws up and I just can't come back. I go through but I'm turned into a jellyfish, fuck, I..."
Lips kiss along your fingers, light suckling as they feel across them, working over your knuckles.
Legs wrap around your arm as hooves and a face softly massage the muscles beneath your skin.
Bodies push and snuggle against you, faces nuzzling against your chest.
"I... Fuck... I've been fighting and fighting and fighting near enough all my life but... I've never had anything to really lose before... God... I don't want this to all screw up in a hundred different ways and not be with you any more..."
As you breathe, you can taste the very air...
It smells like Applejack.
You peer through the gaps of your fingers, to see her close enough that her nose almost brushes yours, as she slowly breathes in and out, in time and opposite to you.
When did this become so relaxing for you?
Dashie gently holds your hand, prying it away from your face, and pressing it to her tuft while she delicately coos.
AJ's nose bumps yours as you breathe each others breath, and she slowly, softly speaks.
"Ah love you Anon... We'll get through this... No matter what... Look in my eyes baby... Am I lyin? Is there any doubt whatsoever, that we won't all get through this... That we won't be together again... Ah don't care what happens, how long it takes... That's just how it'll be..."
More pony faces crowd around you, hot, sweet, different breaths lightly blasting against you as cheeks smoosh together.
"Ah trust you Anon... All you gotta do is trust me."
Your arms move to encircle as many ponies as you can.
"I do..."
AJ smiles, and leans in the tiniest bit closer
"So what are ya'll worried about?"
Her lips connect with yours, and your eyes close. You kiss her tenderly, lovingly, while she does the same.
The moment her lips leave yours, a new pair does it's utmost to make you feel loved, as gentle, smooth kiss after kiss blesses your lips, and after seven short sweet sessions of smooching, where your eyes drift back open, you're not even fully sure who was who.
"Thanks AJ. Thanks girls."
"I can see why they like you."
You blush, remembering Celestia was stood right there, and as you look up, find that she hadn't moved an inch.
"You are awfully cute when you're emotional."
She giggles as you squirm, and Luna shouts out "Preparations art done, we just needeth to waiteth for first moonlight. Before we loseth our appetite for good over such unnatural displays, some more food wouldst beest most welcometh!"
Celestia leans towards you, "Don't mind her, she's just trying to seem tough. Why I don't think I've ever heard so many eth's and art's from her before! Now, is there any cake in this place?"
And so you spent over an hour, with at least two ponies pressed up against you at all times, trying to take in as much of you as they can before your departure...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
...Now with a full stomach from dinner, a head full of stories of how life is in mirror land from Twilight, and an empty pair of balls from where Pinkie mercilessly sucked you off from under the table, you now stand by the mirror.
Celestia begins the sendoff with, "Are you sure you don't wish to hear more of the history of our land before you leave? Perhaps of other magical anomalies we have experienced, tasks I have sent Twilight on, and how they all tie together in one incredible story that perfectly ties up any plot holes my dear student has been wondering about over the years?"
"Yeah, I'm sure."
"Oh, well, good luck then."
You give each of your girls one last hug and a kiss.
Pinkie giggles as your lips break contact with hers. "Hey, I just had a great idea, to like, truly show that the human girls are our human copies or whatever, you should totally bang them in the same order you did here!"
You smile. "I'll keep that under advisement."
Lastly, you reach Luna.
"Don't die."
You can't help but smile more, if only to ruffle her feathers. "I knew you cared about me."
She snarls, "Seriously, countless lives hangeth by a thread. Once thee returneth, thee may kicketh the bucket instantly if it be thee desire... Now here, taketh this, the Elements art inside."
She hands you a rectangular wooden box, before taking a deep breath in, then letting out a strained one before speaking.
"Anon, stripeth. We toldeth thee before, the portal couldst taketh thee and hardly aught else... Or, thee may loseth a handeth but keepeth thy robes. And aye, I am serious, prithee, stripeth and wend through the portal, and doth not utter a single word more on this."
She hastily moves away from you, over to Celestia.
You take a few seconds to fully process this. You gulp, take one last look at her to make sure she is really being serious, before you strip, using a hand and the wooden box to hide your modesty.
Pinkie sighs.
"I sure am going to miss my daily helpings of cum to get me through the day."
"Pinkie!" Twilight splutters, "N-not in front of the Princesses..."
"Am I addicted to Anon's cum? Is there a Cumaholic's Anonymous club I can go to? I might be deprived of it for a while... "
"Pinkie darling, you're being ridiculous." Rarity interrupts.
"Teehee, I know, why would I ever need help for that? Not when I've been saving up anyway." She kicks at a wooden barrel that you've only just now noticed, that's bigger than her. It doesn't budge, at all, and what's more, it doesn't sound hollow in the slightest. A line of white goo oozes from the lid, down the side of the barrel.
"Wh... What the, when did you...? How did you...?" You struggle to understand. Forget about how she could hide that she's been storing your cum, that barrel has got to be the culmination of every load you've ever shot in your entire life.
"Hey, a gal's gotta be prepared for when Anon and the cum factories go on holiday. I'll miss you my babies!"
Luna's eye twitches. "Please Anon... Just go already."
You turn to the mirror, and open the box, just to check the large, mostly black, marble like Elements of Harmony are actually there and you're not about to make a really dumb, simple mistake... You reach out a hand and touch the cold reflective surface....
...
Nothing happens.
"Errrr..."
"Pinkie, pluck one of Anon's hairs. Then stepeth backeth. Yond ought to doth it."
She jumps up behind you, takes a single strand of hair in her teeth from your head, and as she drops back down, pulls it from your scalp.
You hold back an 'ouch', and as she draws away from you, the surface of the mirror starts to shimmer, slightly rippling. You make a mental note not to gain any weight whilst over there. You take a breath, before ducking down to fit through the portal, the actual mirror portion of it barely over five foot tall....
Just as you walk through, you catch Pinkie exclaiming "Good job I drained his nuts fifteen minutes ago, otherwise we'd have had to shave his whole head and body!"
Author's Note
A big thank you to BadTouch and Free Roamer for supporting me through Patreon!
I'll try to make sure the next update or any other stories I'm thinking of don't take so abysmally long seeing as people are actually following me and what I'm doing. I don't want this to remain unfinished when I've been invested in stories in the past that were abandoned.
