Princess Problems and Problem Princesses
Wham!
The doors to the castle slammed open, a heavy thud booming across the hallway. Starlight Glimmer looked up from her book —Haycartes' Guide to Advanced Transfiguration Magic— and glanced over at Twilight. There was a heavy sigh from the Princess of Friendship as she looked up from behind her pile of literature.
"Spike, please go see who that is. And if it's the changeling ambassador again, tell him that no, he's not allowed to go around asking for love donations without applying for a permit."
"Alright," Spike groaned as he stretched, groggily moving from his cozy spot to investigate the visitor. As he approached the library entrance, the enormous library doors banged open, knocking Spike clear across the room where he landed with a hard thud.
"Where is she!? Where is Starlight Glimmer?"
Princess Luna stood imposingly upon the library threshold, hot steam trailing her every exhale. She stomped a hoof, cracking the marble as all eyes watched her warily.
"I-I'm right here, Princess." Starlight slowly moved from her cushion to where Princess Luna could see her properly. "What's happening? What d—"
"Silence!"
The castle shook. Books fell upon the floor. A single owl hooted.
Twilight peeked over her tome just enough to raise an eyebrow at Princess Luna. "Really, Luna... this is a library. Or do I need to go get Fluttershy?"
Princess Luna puffed her cheeks, but otherwise continued to leer down at Starlight. "Pardon our intrusion, Oh, Princess of Books. We are here only for this—" Princess Luna's cheeks stretched impossibly wide. "—precious little pony."
Starlight squirmed, her rump now firmly glued to the ground. "Princess Luna?"
"We've had enough, Starlight." Princess Luna's horn glowed as she approached. "'Oh, Starlight, Starbright, the first star I see tonight.'" She stepped forward, dark magic oozing and stretching towards Starlight. "Neigh, little Starlight, run not from thy princess. Your fate is inevitable."
A scream echoed out into the halls of the castle as a star was lost to the darkness.
Starlight opened up her eyes, then reached forward to move a pair of wings that had sheltered her from Princess Luna's magic. A moment later, she jumped, prancing in a circle until she finally bit down on a pair of ruffled wings that had grown from her side.
"I'm... I'm..." Her eyes sparkled as she turned and gaped towards Twilight, who was still neck deep in Equestrian tax code. "Twilight, I'm an alicorn!"
Twilight stopped, setting her quill down before she slowly turned, her expression never shifting from its passive state. “You have my sympathies.”
“What?” Starlight started, but was then magically yanked towards the library exit.
Princess Luna growled as she pulled the mare along. “Get ready, sweet princess. You’re going to be my little Twilight from now on.”
Hooves kicked, flailed and thumped against the floor as Starlight was dragged out of the library.
After the moment passed, Spike turned and looked towards Twilight. “You gonna do something about that?”
"We all have to do our time, Spike." Twilight turned a page with her magic. "Besides, she never gets to help ponies at the school; who am I to ruin that for her?"
Spike scowled for a long moment before it turned into a small smile. "Think Princess Luna can handle her?"
"I give them one night." Twilight scratched something onto a piece of a paper. "Fifty bits."
"Two hours... and you're on." Spike yawned and looked out the way Starlight and Princess Luna had gone. "Good luck, Starlight."
A shadowy form emerged from the ground, centered atop a grassy hill that overlooked Ponyville. The pair of alicorns appeared as Princess Luna’s magic fell away from them. Starlight suppressed a shudder as she took stock of her surroundings.
“Wh-what’s going on? Princess, wha—”
Princess Luna flared her wings, and Starlight shut her trap.
“You are charged with guarding the dreams of Ponyville tonight, Mini-Twilight. They pine for you so much.” Princess Luna grinned down at Starlight. “Thou must not disappoint them.”
“I’ve never studied dream magic.” Starlight looked from Princess Luna to Ponyville and back again. “What am I suppo—”
Princess Luna gave Starlight a push, and the newly ascended alicorn fell into a world of shadowy light, plopping back onto the hill where Princess Luna smirked at her. “Welcome to the realm between dreams, Starlight. Now go! We shall be watching!”
Princess Luna exploded into a flurry of dark, fluttering shadows, leaving Starlight to sit there in a daze.
“So this is what Twilight deals with…” Starlight flapped her wings, little motes of dream-magic floating alongside her. “Alright, Starlight, you can do this.”
Starlight drifted down the hill and over the homes of Ponyville. She flapped her wings, looking around with an unsure smile on her face. “You know, flying isn’t nearly as hard as Twilight said it was.” Then she smacked right into the candy cane atop Sugarcube Corner. Her wings stopped flapping and covered her muzzle reflexively.
“Oh…” She looked down, still airborne regardless of the lack of lift. “Right, dream magic.” Shaking her head, Starlight floated past the bakery, still flapping her wings despite the need. “Now, where am I—”
A building in the distance shimmered with a shadowy outline, and Starlight changed course. The unique curved shape of Carousel Boutique came into view, billowing smoke pressing against the outside windows.
“Rarity… What in Equestria…” Starlight shook her head. “It better not be a chipped hoofnail.”
Starlight started knocking on the door, only for her hoof to phase through it. Shrugging, she moved inside and started towards the stairs. A moment later, Starlight paused in the middle of the showroom, her ears perked.
“Is… is that Death Metal?” Moving closer, the hard, coarse chords and slides assaulted her ears. Starlight found her way down the halls, knowing which room was Rarity’s even without seeing the door pounding in time with a heavy bass drum. As she reached for the door, she found that it was solid, and moved instead to twist the knob.
“Here goes nothing.”
Starlight’s world exploded as a wave of sound knocked her off her hooves. Groaning, she stood and peered inside, where a huge, expansive crowd of ponies jumped and cheered before a massive stage. Spotlights of different hues twisted and fell upon a dazzling white mare, adorned in a black, spike-studded jacket. The mare’s hooves danced up and down a diamond-shaped guitar, her mane whipping back and forth as she banged her head in time with the bass.
“Rarity?” Starlight questioned as she moved through the crowd. Her words barely penetrated past her thoughts, the drummer banging out a wicked solo as she neared the stage. “Is this really a nightmare?”
Rarity spun in a circle just as the drummer finished, hammering down on her guitar strings as the lights twisted around above her. A gleeful, almost-manic grin spread across her face as her hooves actually caught fire. The crowd went nuts, and Starlight found herself knocked around as ponies reached up to catch a piece of her stardom. Then she started to sing, and Starlight’s jaw dropped.
“Raze the sun. Raze the sun. We’ll make it night before we’re done.”
The deep, gravelly voice that now came out of Rarity’s mouth would have been appropriate for a diamond dog.
“Well…” Starlight blinked. “I’m jealous.”
“She’s got good taste, we must give her that.” The cool sound of Princess Luna’s voice pierced the cacophony of noise as she stepped into Starlight’s view.
“Princess Luna?” Starlight shook her head furiously. “What am I supposed to do here? There’s no nightmare. I mean, this isn’t what I’d expected, but…”
Princess Luna held up her hoof. “We love this part.”
“Dowse the flame. Drown the fire. Bring the moon ever higher.” Rarity screamed out into the crowd, then with an eloquent flip, smashed her guitar upon the floor.
The crowd went nuts. Then the room went completely silent.
“I can’t believe this.”
“My daughter, one of those ponies.”
“If Sweetie sees this…”
The harsh voices of a pair of ponies sliced through the silence, and Rarity’s eyes constricted to pinpricks. She looked towards the sound as a harsh spotlight highlighted a mare and stallion talking from across the room.
“We’ll have to kick her out.”
“Disown her, send letters to the rest of the family.”
Rarity held a hoof out as she walked to the edge of the stage.
“Mother? Father?” Her eyes began to water. “I c-can explain, I just—”
The pair of ponies turned away, walking further and further away from the stage, from their former daughter. “Sweetie Belle will just have to find a new role model, darling. There’s just no helping this one.”
“No! Wait, I’m not—I can’t—”
The spotlights turned off, one by one, Rarity flinching at the throw of each switch. After a moment, only a dim crimson light remained center stage, Rarity’s white coat now drowned in a blood-red hue.
Starlight was already on the stage as tears began to fall. Her hooves clopped against the metal stage as she slowly approached, her hoof reaching forward. Rarity stiffened just as Starlight was about to touch her, making Starlight hesitate.
“Rarity, I’m here. It’s me, Starlight.”
“And?” Rarity turned her head, looking at Starlight through the corner of her eye. “Oh, and you’re a princess now? Great, isn’t your life just perfect?”
Starlight winced, then scowled. “Now wait, who do you—” Then she stopped, pressed her hoof to her chest, then breathed out. “Rarity, you know this isn’t how things actually are, right?”
“Oh?” Rarity raised an eyebrow, turning to face Starlight. “Don’t you think I know that? I gave up this dream so long ago.” Rarity choked out a laugh, tears dripping from her muzzle. “Rarity’s always so generous, always so giving.” She spat on the ground. “Have you ever sacrificed a piece of yourself because you’re afraid? Afraid of what your family will think—of what your sister will think?”
Starlight shrunk back as Rarity scowled. “Generosity is a curse, Starlight.”
“Y-you don’t actually believe that, Rarity.” Starlight breathed, glancing out into a now shadowy mass of ponies. Only Princess Luna was visible, who was watching her with an expressionless face. “Generosity is why your sister looks up to you. It’s why you met your friends…”
“It’s why I gave up the truest part of myself. My parents would have never accepted—” She looked down at her spiked jacket and black hoofnails. —”this as their daughter.”
Starlight sniffed, then stopped as her eyes narrowed. “Do you really think so, Rarity? I doubt it.”
“W-what?” Rarity stammered as she stomped a hoof. “Yes, I’m sure of it.”
“Did you ever actually ask them?” Starlight took a step forward, and now Rarity was the one taking a step back. “Did you show them, tell them how passionate you are, even once?”
“I… I…” Rarity’s eyes darted back and forth. “There’s no way that they would.” She looked down at herself. “This isn’t what a proper mare looks like—acts like.”
“Rarity, you owe it to yourself, and them, to try.” Starlight put her hoof on Rarity’s shoulder. “Why don’t you be generous to the one pony who really deserves it for once?”
“Starlight—you.” Rarity gaped, an invisible frog caught in her throat. “That’s… I don’t…”
The newest princess walked up and wrapped her wing around Rarity. “If Twilight gave me a chance after nearly destroying the world, repeatedly—” Starlight winced. “—then you definitely deserve one. Showing everypony your truest self isn’t a bad thing. Your friends will still care about you, and anyone that doesn’t wasn’t a real friend to begin with.”
Rarity burst into a fresh wave of tears as she snuggled against Starlight. After a long moment, she sniffed, then used Starlight’s wing as a tissue. Starlight frowned at Rarity, who blushed when she realized what she’d done.
“Sorry, Starlight. It’s just that, well, that’s most touching thing I’ve ever heard.” They broke apart, and Rarity looked around into the gloomy room. Princess Luna had disappeared, leaving only a murmuring black mass of ponies.
“It’s about time for an encore, don’t you think, Starlight?” Rarity pressed a button on the floor that hadn’t been there a moment earlier, and all the lights blazed once more. A wave of anticipation washed over the crowd as a guitar materialized in front of Rarity, even more fabulous than the last. “Care to join me, Princess?”
Starlight couldn’t suppress a grin as she stepped up to the now unoccupied drum set. “Oh, yeah, let’s turn this into a real party.”
There were reports of loud, vulgar music from Princess Luna’s tower for a week.
Author's Note
The start of a little side story for the fun of it. I promise all the chapters won't get this dramatic if I can help it. I've started on the second one already, and I might be able to finish it in the morning... maybe 
As always, comments and critiques are always appreciated.
With love and dedication, Dreams of Ponies
