The Drunk And The Braggart Of His Heart

"So I try to get a grip on the mattress with his cock buried to the hilt inside of me and he just keeps mushing my head against the floorboard."

Rainbow listened intently to Berry Punch as they walked through aisle after aisle at the grocery story in search for various items on their shopping list.

"The wet slaps of his balls against my thigh and the deep grunts are the only thing I can hear."

The new teacher lauded her newest student with vivid details of past experiences, so Rainbow could learn from them.

"The big red machine goes completely savage after the first creampie and lubricates my anus with spit to get some anal sex. I stop him just in time from double dipping through a deepthroat blowjob and get things clean again before he shoves in the full length in one go with reckless abandon."

The brewer was a wealth of knowledge for Rainbow. While Rarity had her covered in romantic stuff, Berry knew the more lewd facets and gritty details of being together with a stallion.

"Whatever you do, don't switch from anal to vaginal in the same way. The taste is a real mood killer."

"We've never done butt stuff. How do you make it not taste bad from that hole?" If it weren't so nerdy, Rainbow would carry around a notepad to write everything down. The sister of his coltfriend was a sexual goldmine and only source to ask for this kind of information.

The sex education from her mother skipped topics like hygiene instructions for angry anal sex.

It helped that Berry was so nonchalant and open. "For long term, eat a lot of fruit and bright colored vegetables and avoid deep fried food. Coffee makes your taint taste more bitter like almonds, so find out if he's into that. For a trial or spontaneous occasion, just wash up really well and use a bit of edible lube in his favorite flavor."

Berry saw the expectation in Rainbow's eyes and sighed.

"Hard Knock loves strawberries. Take the brand in aisle five next to the coconut massage oil."

"Thank's your'e the best!" Rainbow was gone in a blur, wriggling skillfully around the other shoppers and close by mares that were trying to listen in for their own benefit.

One had the courage to approach Berry. "Excuse me?"

"Yes?" she looked up from a pack of raisins on sale and saw a pale blue pegasus mare with a white mane.

"I'm Cloud Chaser," the mare introduced herself with a bit of wariness. "You seem to know a lot about intimate stuff, so I thought that you could help us too."

The citizens of Ponyville, especially other mares, didn't get too close to Berry for obvious reasons. She had a bad reputation from her youth and figured, if she truly bettered herself, others would notice someday and come around. What she didn't figure out, was that it would happen so soon.

"Who's us?" Across the aisle, Berry could see another pegasus mare with a slightly lighter blue coat, straight opal mane, and a large pink bow. She waved at them and hid again behind their shopping cart from several stares of onlookers.

"My sister Flitter and I. We share our coltfriend Thunderlane. The sweet stallion always tries his best to please us both and never leaves us unsatisfied, but he's always lacked in the sperm department."

Sharing a coltfriend wasn't unusual. Some mares didn't mind that a stallion split his attention between two or more companions, if he manages to show their love for them fairly and equally. Berry wasn't one of those mares, because she didn't like to share beloved things with others.

Whether that made her selfish or romantic she could not say. "Tell me exactly what you want. Taste? Amount? Consistency?"

"The taste is heavenly," Cloudchaser hummed and Flitter agreed with nodding repeatedly. "We just want more of it. We dream of getting showered in the love juices of our beloved stallion, being drowned and smothered by him."

At this point, Berry considered the obsession of male body fluid could be a pegasus thing. Rainbow thought herself clever, but the nose on this brewer was good enough to smell spunk through scented soap and breath mints.

"Tricky..." Berry leaned on her shopping cart and thought about a solution from experiences. Just in time, she remembered a camping trip that got her kicked out of the mare scouts.

"Here's what you do: Your coltfriend needs to eat lots of protein foods like eggs, almonds, oats and dairy products with a side of celery to all those meals in large quantities. You also go to the local pharmacy and ask for the 'ink filler' food supplement. The employee knows me and will know what you mean."

Cloud Chaser was taking notes, eying the instructions she had so far. "For how long?"

"Keep that diet for a week and stop when all three of you are available. Start in the morning by getting him hard while he still sleeps. Use light strokes and keep him close to climax without letting him. After waking him up, keep the guy on the edge and stiff as long as possible throughout the day. The moment he goes flaccid, you lose your window of opportunity."

"I see." The mare hung on every word from Berry's lips. "Anything I should look out for?"

"Be patient with your stallion. He'll go wild from the desire of release but try to postpone it to midday at the least. I warn you though, do it somewhere with washable furniture and a room you don't use often. You'll be taking shots to the face like paint-filled water balloons and get lots of angry fucking in every orifice he can find."

The mare drooled from imagining the scene. "Thank you!"

"No problem. Everything you need for nutrition should be in Aisle three." Berry walked away with her cart and left two happy mares to make preparations for their project.

And bumped into a wall of twenty more mares.

"I can't suppress my gag reflex!"

"I climax twice as fast as my husband!"

"I sometimes smell funny down there!"

"His cum tastes like dirt!"

"I'm intimidated by his cock!"

The cluster of mares grew and pushed Berry against the shelf for cereal. When an Element of Harmony considered the council of her worthwhile why shouldn't they? A sea of faces pleading for advice from somepony they could actually ask without judgment.

Berry went for the lightning round approach. "Practice swallowing on stewed cucumber and overripe bananas! Masturbate more often to gain stamina! Eat healthier, wash better and go to a doctor! Let him drink ananas juice thrice a day for better taste! Put a little hat on the tip and draw cute eyes on the shaft to make the scary dick less scary!"

Two blue legs wrapped themselves around Berry's barrel and she felt herself being lifted into the air, hovering over the yelling crowd.

"Hey, she's my adviser for sex stuff! Get your own!" Rainbow Dash had returned, holding the sister of her coltfriend like a giant teddy bear and keeping the mares at bay, which turned out to be difficult for the pegasi in the crowd that also had taken to the air.

"We're supposed to be shopping for my brother. The guy who I live with?" Berry deadpanned at the desperate Rainbow Dash. "You won't get rid of me as long as you date my brother. Put me down and let me help these ponies."

The mare averted her gaze from Rainbow Dash. "The townsfolk usually don't want to hear anything from me..."

They both lowered slowly to the ground. Berry seemed to enjoy the attention and Rainbow could talk to her anytime she wanted for advice. Lending that opportunity to others sometimes didn't seem such a big of a deal. Especially, if the sister or her coltfriend could get some happiness from it.

"Ok, listen up ladies!" Rainbow gave her best expression of a Wonderbolt Drill Seargent. "Form a line and get some order into this mess! Bring a table and two chairs from the furniture aisle. All of you will profit from getting advice without shouting over each other."

In ten seconds flat, Berry sat in a comfortable chair behind a desk with a cold drink, listening to mares and their sexual problems.

"... my little honey bun has recently some really weird ideas with our pastries..."

How did they get here? One moment, she was choosing between two brands of raisins and the next ponies stood in line for advice from the town drunk deadbeat. A little interest from Rainbow Dash was all to change the perception of the townsfolk and give Berry a chance.

It felt great.

Her depravity and poor life choices were actually good for something and she felt nothing but gratitude towards Rainbow Dash for making this possible.

On her list, the weird marefriend of his brother had shifted from tolerable to totally not so bad.

Baby steps for most, giant steps for her.