Fallout: Equestria: Six Bones and a Bunch of Stones

by FireheartThePone

Rating: mature
Tags: Adventure, Derpy Hooves, Violence, Crossover, Death, Main 6, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe, Original Character, Spike, Science Fiction, Cutie Mark Crusaders
Length: 4420

What happens when a thousand-year old scientist finds himself following the Stable Dweller herself?

Hello. You’re reading the personal journal of Royal Scientist G. Just a tip for reading this: Year Zero is the year I was born. Well, hoping nothing bad has happened to me actually, scratch that. I don’t care if something happened to me or not. Anyway, here’s a record of what happened to me. Learn from my mistakes. Please.

to
This is a Fallout Equestria story, set from the POV of an immortal bystander watching Littlepip's antics. It's set in a journal style, meaning that there aren't proper chapters. I've made it so that each area is it's own chapter.

Published 2017-10-31 02:10:10 UTC
Last updated 2017-12-09 00:04:49 UTC

Area 1: Ponyville

Date: Day 184 of Year 1019, Time: Around Noon, Location: Somewhere near the ruins of Ponyville

Wonderful. My last journal got destroyed by a radigator. I mean, seriously! What are the chances that the one thing the brute manages to hit is the saddlebag holding the book keeping me sane! Probably more of the universe’s tricks. Good thing I had this. Means I have to start over though. Hello, I’m G, you know what I’ll just put it in later. I’ll make another log once I get to a safe place.

Date: Day 184 of Year 1019, Time: Evening, Location: Ruins of Ponyville

Right. Made it to a building. I think it used to be Vinyl and Octavia's house, since what paint is left is split down the middle, but it’s not much more than a useful hidey-hole. This place is a raider town now. Remember when it was bright and colourful. Those days are long gone…

Sorry. Anyway, I had to hide. I may be immortal, but I can still hurt. One advantage to being a skeleton: Nobody pays any attention to you. Going to stay here for the night. See you in the morning.

Date: Day 185 of Year 1019, Time: Early Morning, Location: Ruins of Ponyville

Hello world. Still hate me? Okay then. Right. Now I can sum up what’s happened recently. My name is Windy Days, though I usually go by G. I used to be Head Royal Scientist of Canterlot. I experimented in combinations of science, magic, and technology. Eventually, I discovered many things, a lot of which no sane being should know. My biggest achievement was discovering how to access the timelines… To some extent. I couldn’t interact with them, but I could see them. Then it was only a matter of time before I did work out how to interact. I never got the chance. I got old, and Celestia, fearing I may mess something up as I got old, tired, delusional, and the like, asked me to retire. I did, as I understood her reasons, much as it hurt me to leave such a large project unfinished. I passed the job down to one of my sons, Stormy Days. We had always had weather-based names, despite being unicorns and earth ponies. Anyway, Stormy was a good lad, but despite his knowledge, was afraid he might break something, which was fair of him. It was widely known he was both narcoleptic and just lazy in general, and it was quite possible for him to fall asleep at a critical moment. Anyway, we never figured out how to access other timelines fully. But that small meddling was apparently enough. I got old, and laid on my deathbed… But never quite got there. It became quite a thing around the hospital, to bet on when ol’ Windy would finally kick the bucket. But I didn’t. I kept going, and going, and going. Other patients and staff got old themselves, and they passed away. But not me. I was rather interested myself. I finally started to wonder if I was immortal, and eventually started experimenting. I started trying to get out of bed and walk around. Eventually managed it. The hospital staff found me one night, leaning against a wall, completely exhausted. But I had at least made it out into the hall. From then on, it wasn’t ‘When will Windy die”, it was “When will Windy make a full recovery… from old age.”

…Sorry. Rambles of an old horse, huh? Anyway, I’ll go find out what’s going on. See you.

Date: Day 185 of Year 1019, Time: Late Afternoon, Location: Ruins of Ponyville

Hello again. Wandered around a bit, Made sure to keep out of raider sight. As I said before, bullets hurt, even if they can’t kill me. Found Sweet Apple Acres. Used to be a nice place. Almost never went there in daylight. Half the time the family was there, knocking down apples from the trees, and the other half I had other things to do. Only got to look once or twice, but those few times were rather good. Found Stable 2. Lots and lots of not alive skeletons at the door. Not that nice. Came back here, after going for a wander around the main town. Tried to lockpick a couple of things I found, but it’s a bit difficult when all you have is a thin wire and not much else. I could have used magic, but I'm not as good at lockpicking with it than science. Needless to say, I jammed the locks. Anyway, going to have a look at the place at night, see what it looks like then. Recon in the morning.

Date: Day 186 of Year 1019, Time: Very Early Morning, Location: Ruins of Ponyville

Well, that happened. During the night, I found myself at Stable 2 again. And I found a pony, just stepping out. I ducked into hiding, not that hard when you’re both a skeleton and dressed in a black cloak that makes me look like the Gray Mare, and watched her walk out. Rather good-looking mare, or at least, I thought, with a sense of purpose around her. I couldn’t see quite what she looked like in the dark, but I could see the glow of her Pipbuck. Useful machines, those. Got one myself during the war. Didn’t work. Apparently, their magic gets confused when they’re trying to track the life signs of someone who no longer has his vital organs. Anyway, the mysterious pony got out of the cellar, looked up… And looked very like she was trying hard not to vomit. Apparently the sky’s rather the sight when all you’ve had above your head is ceiling for your entire life. Went back to my temporary home after that. Left her to her own devices.

Date: Day 186 of Year 1019, Time: Early Afternoon, Location: Ruins of Ponyville

Well, that was something. Filly went into town, shot up the raiders, saved some ponies, and went on her way. Quite the heroic one. Sent a message to DJ-PON3 with a communicator I found in the bones outside Stable 2. Told him about the Stable Dweller. I was tired, all right? Anyway, I'm going to follow her. See what else she gets up to.

Author's Note

Right. First story posted here on FimFiction. G will not be leveling up. He hit the level cap a loooooong time ago. Anyway, what do you think? And no, he won't just follow Littlepip the entire time. He's going to go watch other ponies as well (Like Murky Number Seven and Puppysmiles).

I've done a rewrite! Now I've tried to make him seem more professional, as his character developed without me writing more for this story, and this is outdated now.

Area 2: Appleoosas

Date: Day 188 of Year 203, Time: Evening, Location: Just outside New Appleoosa

Our brave little adventurer just got shot. Four times. And she’s still going. Just. Fell unconscious, which makes sense, and the ponies she was trying to protect took her in. Good ol’ Calamity. Shooting ponies based on appearance. Eh. Worked out in the end. Anyway, he’s gone in with them. I’m heading into the town myself. Gotta pick up some supplies.

Date: Day 190 of Year 203, Time: Early Afternoon, Location: New Appleoosa

Hey, she’s finally up! Just spotted her going into Ditzy’s place. Always liked her. Before I came here, last time I saw her was in Manehattan, with another ghoul, her friend, who was apparently called May. According to Ditzy, she went feral. I know it happens to every ghoul eventually, (Though maybe not Ditzy, she’s been going just fine) but it’s still sad. Anyway, I’ll stick around till our adventurer’s left, then I’ll tail her. I really need to find out her name. Besides, I still need one last thing…

Date: Day 190 of Year 203, Time: Night, Location: Just outside New Appleoosa

She’s left with Calamity. Not for good though, from what I’ve gathered it’s to take out the old Stable. Don’t remember which one it was. I think it was… Number 24? I’ll be able to clarify once we get there. Bloody giant numbers on the doors. There’s a thunderstorm going on, and I just spotted her literally trying to hide under Calamity, only for him to push her away. Guess she hasn’t seen thunder before. There was a big flash of lightning, think she might have seen me for a second. Anyway, I managed to finish my weapon, and I’ve got it in my saddlebags now. Faust, I love matter-compression spells. Partially break the laws of physics, but then again magic’s been doing that for Faust knows how long. I’ll check up once something interesting’s happened.

Date: Day 191 of Year 203, Time: Dawn, Location: New Appleoosa

Well. She got back. And immediately crashed in the clinic. Fair, considering she spent most the night presumably fighting ‘chimera’ they’re apparently called. I didn’t try to see in. Stables have a kind of barrier around them that blocks things like E.F.S. Why? How should I know? Most likely another of Stable-Tec’s sick ‘experiments.’ Anyway, she blew up Stable 24, the river flooded in, goodbye chimera. It’s actually kind of sad. As a scientist, I really wanted to study the things. Still, probably for the best. Though, I am interested as to how in the name of physics a filly created literal death on legs. Guess we’ll never know. G, signing off for now.

Date: Day 191 of Year 203, Time: Around Noon, Location: New Appleoosa

Littlepip. That’s her name. Was in the tavern, and learnt a couple of things. Her name’s Littlepip, she apparently thought Red Eye was our leader. Considering she didn’t know, it’s okay. She’s also just discovered DJ, who was talking about her. Looks like my message got through. She and Calamity just headed off, I think to Old Appleoosa.

Date: Day 191 of Year 203, Time: Noon, Location: Between New and Old Appleoosas

Following the train

Date: Day 191 of Year 203, Time: Afternoon, Location: Old Appleoosa

Sorry about that earlier log, they left rather suddenly, and I didn’t have much time to react. Thank Faust that I still remembered my ‘Fast-run’ spell. (Rarity would be disappointed with the uncreativeness of the name, and, to be blunt, so am I.) Currently watching them sneak in. Thank you, Sightline. The Wallhack Scope is proving useful for the millionth time. Well, not the millionth, but you know what I mean. Oh, didn’t I mention it? It’s pretty much a detachable sniper rifle scope, which uses a combination of E.F.S, blunt magic, and heat-tracking technology to, well, wallhack. It’s better than ‘See through walls’ spells, because you can actually see exactly where somepony is instead of it just looking like they’re floating in the void. It was a joint project between the M.W.T, the M.A.S, and technically myself, as they used designs I created. It’s technically still a prototype, but since no more are going to be made… Sorry. Another ramble. I’ll make another log detailing how their break-in attempt goes.

Date: Day 191 of Year 203, Time: Afternoon, Location: Old Appleoosa

Seriously? She had to start firing, didn’t she? I’ve had to leap in, across the town, just so that she doesn’t get overwhelmed. Again, thank you matter compression spells. You generally don’t expect a scythe to spring out of nowhere, do you? Needless to say, about half the slavers I’ve encountered so far flat out ran away. The other half… Wheat. I’m currently writing this while watching out for any more with the Scope. I can see Littlepip, the slaves, the slavers she’s fighting, and Calamity. I think most of them were gone beforehoof. Welp. See you for now.

Date: Day 191 of Year 203, Time: Late Afternoon, Location: Old Appleoosa

What. The. Actual. Let me tell you what happened. She stopped. I could see hostiles, Littlepip herself (I’ve given her a marker, so I can tell that it’s her), and another neutral. She ran off, I presume to plan, coming across a group of slavers. They started going down, along with gunshots, so I think either she or Calamity took them down. Anyway, it caused a firefight. It turned out to have been Calamity, as Pip started moving despite shots still ringing out. The slavers came out of the barn, Pip slipped inside, the two hostiles inside winked out. Later I discovered she stumbled upon the armoury, so you can guess what happened next. Yep, she barricaded herself in. At least, I think she did. Scope can’t magically display non-living stuff. (Though I don’t know if I’d show up on it.) Then she turned herself into a trotting arsenal. Again, I think. Started messing around. I think she started using a terminal, since she sat down like she was. Then, she stalked around for about two seconds, and was blown back from the door. I could audibly hear the ‘thoom’ of the missile from half a town away. The slavers started going down, and Calamity ran in, bending down over Pip, I presume giving her a healing potion. Terribly useful, those. She split up with Calamity, him running off towards the sheriff’s place, her heading towards the other neutral mark. They met, and just stood there. I think they were talking. Then, after roughly a minute, they headed off to go meet up with Calamity, who was with a bunch of slaves, considering what their outlines looked like. They broke the slaves out, got into a big fight, then I left my post because I realized either things would go badly or they’d win and get on the train, and head starts are always useful. It ended in the latter by the way. Sorry about that very long entry, I wanted to be able to give you as many details as possible.

Date: Day 191 of Year 203, Time: Night, Location: Between New and Old Appleoosas

Well. That happened. Around twilight. No, not that Twilight- dunno what even happened to her. Probably died in the megaspells. Anyway, around twilight, up the mountain, the train got attacked. They had just set up to go careening downhill (Highly dangerous if you ask me. I mean, have ponies seriously forgotten buffer spells, snail spells, and the like?), when griffons and slavers started attacking. I saw Calamity flying overhead, Pip’s mark looked like it was making progress, and basically they were doing well. I only wish I had a sniper rifle to attach the Scope to. Then I could have actually helped instead of watching like a coward. I can’t die, so not much use in staying out of the fight, especially against slavers. I have a special hate for them. Pony lives pass so quickly, why deny them the right to live it in as much peace as the Wasteland offers? Problem is, I wouldn’t have got there in time, even with the fast-run spell (Which I will now call the Gallop Spell. It needs a name, and that one’s as good as any.) So yeah. Eventually, the slavers all died, Calamity kicked the caboose off the train, lovable idiot, they jumped off, and yeah. I decided to send a message to DJ Pon-3 saying that they died. I think they should lay off the heroics for a bit. Otherwise, every meanie in the Wasteland’s gonna be after her head, just so they can say “Hey, I killed the Stable Dweller!” Again, long entry. See you tomorrow, hopefully.

Author's Note

Here ya go, 'Chapter' 2!

Area 3: Shattered Hoof

Date: Day 192 of Year 203, Time: Early Morning, Location: Middle of Nowhere

How? (I’m running out of starter words. Brilliant.) Pip, Velvet (Listened to them talking, also gave her a marker), and Calamity just fought off a horde of zombies. Sadly they didn’t have any plants on them. (Note to self: Stop making references to other universes you’ve seen.) Anyway, they did what any sane pony would do in that situation. They ran like hell. So did I actually, despite the fact that I can’t die, zombies gnawing on your bones still hurt. That actually doesn’t make sense now that I think about it. I’m literally just bones. I have no nerves, how can I still feel things? Ah well. Probably another of the Universe’s cruel punishments. Really, all I did was meddling in things I wasn’t supposed to, is eternal life and pain really fair? Anyway, Pip did a thing. She reprogrammed a turret to shoot the zombies. I must say, she is very quick on her hooves. They kept going after that, making up a song, before encountering another of Pinkie’s gigantic billboards. Poor, poor Pinkie. Most thought she just went mad. I know what really happened. I’m one of the only two, other than Pinkie herself, who do, and the other one doesn’t really count. Still, that’s a story for another day.

Date: Day 192 of Year 203, Time: Late Morning, Location: Middle of Nowhere

NO.
Pip and her friends came across a barn. There was another in there, a filly I think, but I did notice something. The extremely dangerous something, known as a balefire bomb. And apparently she wanted to use it… for Faust-damned fireworks. Anyway, I didn’t catch everything that happened, I think the filly was obsessed with Pinkie or something, but that’s all I know. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go do whatever the skeleton equivalent of pulling your mane out is because a filly who has no idea what it is was in possession of one of the most dangerous things on Equus.

Date: Day 193 of Year 203, Time: Early Afternoon, Location: Middle of Nowhere

Well, they did the right thing. Sent the filly off to New Appleoosa. Headed off towards Manehattan. Only been there once, after the Apocalypse. Not before though. All I know is that there was a small business that started there. Didn’t get all that far, but it was one of those “Absolutely Everything!” places, kinda like Ditzy’s but this place had a lot more guns. Very “Get into a fight” place. Think it was called Mane Co. or something like that. Anyway, Pip and her friends came across some raiders. Took them out pretty well. Calamity used a wagon to pull them through the air so they could shoot down. Good tactic. Until Calamity got shot. Not so good. Anyway, they crashed, Pip and Calamity went down into the building, shot it up, and yeah. Otherwise they just looted. See you later.

Date: Day 193 of Year 203, Time: Afternoon, Location: Middle of Nowhere

Nice job, Pip! You got caught by the Talons! I was rather surprised Gawd didn’t just kill them immediately. Though now I see that she gave them a job. Gonna tail them, see what they’re up to. Velvet stayed behind though. Makes sense for Gawd to keep one of them behind to make sure they do it. She’s clever like that.

Date: Day 193 of Year 203, Time: Approaching Evening, Location: Shattered Hoof

Pip and Calamity just broke into the Visitor’s Center. Nice going. She read a terminal, then worked on opening a safe. Now, something odd: I recently discovered that the Wallhack Scope has a feature where it can track magic. (Which should eat power like mad. Thing is, the Scope never runs out of power. Maybe Null did something to it. Anyway, I accidentally switched the Scope over to magic watching. Of course, Calamity and Pip showed up, being natural magical beings, but the really odd thing is what was in the safe. It looked like a little figurine, of Rarity I think. Anyway, it was glowing like mad! And when Pip picked it up, the blue glow (Just like mine and Rarity’s magic color) passed into her a bit too. An orange glow, displaying an Applejack figure, was in Pip’s saddlebag, and I noticed the orange glow swirling around in her as well. Now that is interesting. I’ll have to look into that, if I get the chance.

Date: Day 193 of Year 203, Time: Evening, Location: Shattered Hoof

It’s dark, darker, yet darker… I mean, seriously, it’s like vantablack! Thank Faust almighty that the Wallhack Scope and Nightsight spells exist. Pip and Calamity ventured into the main building and explored a bit. They got to Deadeyes, Pip sent Calamity off to a room a little way down the hall, and just waltzed right in. They had a discussion, Deadeyes gave her something, and she left again. I really wish the Scope could do something about audio. I’ll have to test later. Anyway, a couple came out, escorted her, Calamity followed, stuff happened, I got kind of bored just waiting, Calamity picked up Pip, and flew off. I followed them. I’ll make another log once I figure out where they’re going.

Date: Day 193 of Year 203, Time: Night, Location: Middle of Nowhere

They came across a group of Red Eye’s slavers. Surprisingly, they didn’t start shooting immediately. In fact, they just kept going. The Scope appears to have a medical feature too (if I didn’t know better, I’d say it was a convenient deus ex machina!), and hoo boy, Calamity isn’t doing well. Got a big hole in his wing. He can still fly, but it’s obviously causing him pain. (Doctor’s not just an honorary title for me. Unlike Whooves. What kind of name even is that?) Anyhow, they went back to Deadeyes. Pip went in again, talked with the guy, he went away, she picked the safe, and got something out. I think she used a StealthBuck too. At least, Deadeyes and his friends didn’t notice her when they came back in. She did a balancing act, then another pony burst through the door and she dashed out. She got to Calamity, and they flew off. Got to Gawd’s Camp, talked with the griffin herself, and went to sleep. I’ll recon in a bit.

Date: Day 194 of Year 203, Time: Morning, Location: Gawd’s Camp

Now she’s having breakfast. As in meat. Well, a pony’s gotta do what a pony’s gotta do. Yes, I am watching a relative stranger eat her breakfast. That could be classified as something being wrong with me, apart from everything else… Meh. It’s in the name of curiosity. Anyway, Gawd walked in, they had a chat, and went out to talk with Velvet. They had an argument. Eventually seemed to come to an agreement, and Pip set out once again. I’ve been wanting to see Deadeyes and Mister Topaz brought to justice. Brace yourself, Pip…

Date: Day 194 of Year 203, Time: Just before Noon, Location: Shattered Hoof

She’s been looking around for a small while. Expect she’s been looking for the door. Took the time to think of a name for the Wallhack Scope. That name fits, but doesn’t feel right to me. Finally thought of one: Ong’a’klea.* It’s an old, dead language. Translates to ‘The Observer’. Very fitting.

Date: Day 194 of Year 203, Time: Noon, Location: Shattered Hoof

She’s gone to talk with Deadeyes. Apparently made a plan. This is going to be good…

Date: Day 194 of Year 203, Time: Early Afternoon, Location: Gawd’s Camp

Gone back to the campsite. Velvet panicked. Pip gave her a dress. Normal things.

Date: Day 194 of Year 203, Time: Evening, Location: Shattered Hoof

Dear Faust, Velvet’s good. Incredible songs, both of them. I wish I could remember which ones they were… Anyway, Pip shot the table, Deadeyes (More fitting than ever now) and pushed Velvet off the highly volatile stage. Where did they even get that much nitroglycerine? But yes, I recognized that telekinetic glow. She dashed off. I wonder what she’s doing now…

Date: Day 194 of Year 203, Time: Evening, Location: Shattered Hoof

Wow. That was… something. This warrants a long entry. So, first she dashed backstage to check on Velvet. Luckily, the songmare was fine. Then, Calamity dashes in. They talked for a bit, before heading towards the gate. I expect there were turrets there, since they stopped short. She popped another StealthBuck, before going up to the terminal and deactivating the turrets. They went down to the underground area, and met Mister Topaz. There you go, Pip and Co. He’s a dragon. Not the biggest I’ve seen though. I’ve always found dragons interesting. Not just their rather aggressive culture, but their biology as well. I’m still not sure as to how they breathe fire. They were never as advanced as ponies, but by no means was that because they’re stupid. More because the Dragonlands have barely any resources. Anyway, Pip and her friends ran. Smart. They eventually managed to lead him into the turrets, which opened fire. At least, I assume they did. I managed to get out when Red Eye’s slavers attacked, and I’m currently sitting just outside. Was watching with Ong’a’klea. Anyway, he let loose with fire. Most of the ponies in the hall are now dead. Pip and Co. fell out into the yard as Topaz moved around underneath, getting to the cargo elevator. Velvet gave Pip some Buck (I was able to see them visibly), before the little mare went inside again. She met a pony, and headbutted her. Her horn may be on the small side, but it’s still deadly. I feel sorry for the other poor mare. She continued on her way, getting down to the vault. She went inside… And met Mister Topaz. I assume he heard her or something, and abandoned the elevator. They talked, and then Calamity shot the dragon with a plasma cannon. Those have enough magic in them to show up on the scope, yet it still wasn’t enough. Shot him again, then flew off as Topaz followed. I could see them again, having come up the cargo elevator. Pip dropped half a dozen grenades down the monster’s throat. Needless to say, there was a bang. …Wow. I wrote a good amount there. I’ll see what they do in the morning.

Author's Note

This took a while. A very long while. Also, Null is going to be referenced later. Anyway, have more immortal skeleton scientist adventure! And I've noticed, despite him being a scientist and not a wizard, there's a whole lot of magic and not a lot of tech. I'll explain this in later chapters.