The Syndrome Playlist

“So what do you do for fun?”

The van hits a bump and my head smacks into the roof. “Ow. Uh, I don’t know. I’m what you’d call indoor-sy.”

Rainbow Dash turns from her seat, where she’s driving. As the car swerves in the only lane on a two-way street, everyone seems to unconsciously grab onto their seats. Meanwhile, I slam into the window and back over to Pinkie Pie, who is giggling uncontrollably. I’m pretty sure she never stops smiling. “Indoor-sy?” Rainbow Dash asks. “You don’t do, like, sports and stuff?”

I shake my head, both answering the question and trying to get my vision to return to normal. “Nah, I tried a gym membership to get in shape, but it was awful. Can’t lift the bar, and treadmills are the worst.”

Fluttershy barely makes herself heard over the blaring radio. “What’s wrong with treadmills?”

“Are you kidding? Takes a toll on your knees, you don’t go anywhere, and you’re stuck next to some pudgy middle-aged woman who won’t stop talking about her honor roll kids and the upcoming wedding she has to lose weight for to fit into her dress!”

“Are you speaking from personal experience?” asks Rarity.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” I mutter. “Rainbow, it’s the next left and second house on the right.”

The van comes, almost crashing, to a halt, throwing me from my seat to in between Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy. I smile up at them, attempting to get my eyes to look the same direction. “Uh, this is my stop. You should really get a seatbelt for that seat.”

Rainbow Dash shrugs. “I’ll get around to it,” she responds.

“I could use some help getting out of the car.”

With surprising strength, Pinkie Pie hauls me back. “Bye, Alex! Do you want another cupcake before you go?”

I wave my hands back and forth in front of my face, almost yelling, “No! No, no, I’m good, Pinkie. I gotta keep my blood sugar low or my grandma will kill me.” Getting out of the car and grabbing my bag, I give everyone a wave. “Thanks for the ride. I guess I’ll see you guys tomorrow!”

With that, Rainbow burns rubber and hauls ass to wherever teenage girls go after school.

I walk up the steps. I have no idea if my grandparents are home. The garage door is down, the back door is always locked, and I have no idea where the spare key is, because lord knowsIdon’t have one. It’s a bit too late to get back in Rainbow’s van and disappear until dinnertime. I also didn’t grab anyone’s number except for Twilight, who I’m not sure can drive, or has a car, or yadda yadda yadda.

Testing the doorknob reveals the house to be open. Before going in, I steel my stomach and take a deep breath. Don’t get me wrong I love my grandparents. But after the first day of school, I am not looking forward to the interrogation.

I walk in.

Grandma immediately pops her head out of the kitchen. “Hi, Alex! You’ll have to excuse me; I’m making you some first day cookies! How was it?”

I sigh, muttering, “Of course you are.”

“What was that?”

At a normal volume, I respond, “It was okay. First day jitters and all that.”

She smiles before disappearing back to the kitchen. Yelling at me over the oven timer, she asks, “Did school just let out?”

“No, it’s been done since around two.”

“Where were you?”

I shrug off my backpack and start taking off my shoes. “Still at the school. Just, uh, hanging out with some people.”

There’s a flush and Grandpa walks out of the downstairs bathroom with a newspaper in hand and toothpick in mouth. He turns towards the living room before recognizing me. “Hi, Alex!” he says jovially. “How was your day?”

The fire alarm starts going off in the kitchen, causing Grandma to start yelling. “He’s already made some friends, Bill!”

Grandpa turns towards the smell of cookies and the swearing of Grandma. “He did what?”

Louder this time, “He made some friends!”

“What?”

“HE MADE SOME FRIENDS, BILL!”

He turns to look at me with a smile on his face. “Did you now? Any girls?”

“Uh…”

Grandma comes into the fray with a tray of, oh God, magic cookie bars. And I thought I’d be safe from sweets. “Now, Bill, don’t tease him,” she says, offering Grandpa and I cookies. We both take one, though I do it with some hesitation. “But anyone you can see dating, Alex?”

I about choke on my cookie. “Jesus Lorenzo, Grandma, it’s my first day.”

She and Grandpa start laughing as my face gets hot. “We know, we’re just teasing. How are your classes?”

“Eh, they’ll be fine.”

“That’s good.” Grandma suddenly gets serious, asking, “Did you have any problems today?”

“No, I did okay,” I lie.

Seemingly satisfied, they both start to head into the living room. “Come in and have some cookies,” she says. “Your grandpa’s got the Cubs on.”

I finish my cookie so I don’t spew crumbs everywhere. “No, that’s okay. I have some, uh, homework I gotta do. I’ll be in my room.”

With some affirmations from my guardians, I grab my bag and head up.

Walking down the upstairs hall towards my room, I feel my phone go buzz buzz. I pull it out to see an unknown number calling me. Going against my normal instinct of assuming all numbers I don’t know are telemarketers, I answer it.

“Hello?” I ask.

“Is this Alex?” a female voice asks.

“Yeah. Who is this?”

“Hey! It’s Sunset Shimmer. You know, the girl from study hall who is friends with…”

“I know who you are, Sunset. I don’t have that bad a memory.”

“Right. Anyways, the girls and I are going to Sugarcube Corner later and we were wondering whether you’d like to come with!”

Oh. I stop to think. “Uh, you know what, Sunset? I’m going to have to take a rain check on that,” I say slowly, making sure not to word this poorly. “My, um, grandparents and I are going out to dinner later, so I’m booked.”

“Oh. Okay! Don’t worry about it. We’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Sounds good. Bye.”

“Bye!”

I close the door to my room and slump down against it. On the way down, I pull out my ear buds and plug them in. Once I get to the floor, I start up George Harrison. Beware of Darkness sounds good right about now. With Syndrome squared away until tomorrow, I put my head in my arms and burst into silent tears.

It was a good day. I swear it was a good day.