Of Humanity and Equines

by aceotaku

Rating: mature
Tags: Adventure, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Alternate Universe, Human, Main 6, Other, Thriller, Drama, Original Character
Length: 3803

An NYPD cop must deal with a world where a significant portion of humanity has been inexplicably transformed into ponies, as well as a dangerous killer chasing after a certain purple pony. In this case,a killer who may be more than meets the eye...

Kevin Harris is an average police officer working in the NYPD, just trying his best to live by his morals and his family.

It's a shame that he, like a small portion of humanity, has been transformed into a brightly coloured cartoon pony, in his case one named 'Rainbow Dash'. It's an even bigger shame that he has to deal with pony terrorists, a seemingly unstoppable sociopathic murderer and a deluded purple pony claiming to be his best friend and holding mysterious jewels.

He's supposed to be off-duty....

Published 2017-09-21 18:00:07 UTC
Last updated 2017-10-01 12:54:45 UTC

Prologue: The Strange Becomes the Mundane

Queen Chrysalis plotted in her lair, smirking to herself.

She had found herself in an unfamiliar building in an unfamiliar world, but she could surmise that wherever she was, it was a place even more defenceless against her kind than Equestria was.

All she needed was to gather her changelings together, for she had somehow lost them, and then she could conquer this world and drain it of its love unopposed.

Her eyes darted in front of her, glaring into the darkness. “Who’s there?”

The bipedal figure walked closer, holding an object in his hand. “Nobody important.”

He shot her square in the forehead before she could say anything, the former and potential tyrant slumping forward, dead.

The man turned and left the house, paying the corpse no second thought.

As police cordoned off the small, old house, a forensics team pored over the pony-like corpse as a pair of officers, one walking on all fours and the other upright on her hindlegs, looked around the rest of the building for any clues and potential evidence. The one walking on her hindlegs had a light green coat with a white and green swirled mane and tail with golden eyes, her horn showing herself as a unicorn ;while the other was a blue Pegasus with a rainbow coloured mane and tail and magenta eyes.

“Guess we can rule out the possibility of the show’s villains showing up.” The upright pony noted, wearing a simple blown coat over her even more simple black shirt, a pair of brown pants covering her legs. “Non-pony’s too, possibly, but we’ll have to wait to be sure, Changelings are a bit weird.” A police badger pinned to her shirt under her coat read ‘Dwight Conner’.

The rainbow-maned pony shuddered, in contrast wearing a police uniform, her badge reading out ‘Kevin Harris’. “Meaning the ‘Discord Scenario’ could be very real...”

The upright mare nodded, lighting a cigarette and taking a long drag. “Victim’s name was Margaret Avida, lived by herself, didn’t leave her house for several days. Neighbours called when they saw a ‘monster’ peering through her window one night...likely had only just contracted recently, probably hadn’t received any therapy yet, so she likely believed she WAS Queen Chrysalis.”

Kevin glared up at the older, more experienced detective. “Do you REALLY gotta smoke right now?”

Dwight shrugged. “Hey, just cause you got kids doesn’t mean I give a buck. I’ll smoke if I want, not like stuff like this does anything to a pony body.” He took a long drag, puffing smoke out through his nostrils. “So we come here expecting to get an old lady into therapy; worst case deal with a burglary or a wild animal. Instead we come across someone transformed into one of the show’s villains with her brains blown out, and now we gotta deal with a homicide.”

Kevin frowned in thought. “Any suspects? Suspicious figures reported nearby?”

“None. Not even any sign of a murder weapon so far. Hell, old lady kept to herself so much we’re not even sure if anyone would WANT to kill her.” The detective took another drag from his cigarette. “But someone DID, and did so without leaving a trace, not even a sign of a break in.”

“Meaning this was likely premeditated and calculated, rather than a spur of a moment thing, an accident or a burglary gone wrong.”

“Not even any signs of anything stolen.”

Kevin reached a hoof into hsi pocket, pulling ot his phone as he looked it over. “Well, good luck investigating, my shift’s over.”

Dwight raised a brow. “What, that quick?”

“You got plenty people here working the case.” Kevin put his phone back into his pocket. “You can deal with one guy off-duty. I got a family waiting on me.”

Dwight chuckled. “Lucky bastard...my wife bailed on me when she saw me like this.” He tilted his head, frowning in thought. “Yeah, okay, I see your point now. Don’t wanna mess things up like I did.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, sir.”

“You say that, but I dunno, our relationship was pretty rocky even before...this. You take care of that lady of yours, your kids too, don’t take ‘em for granted. You never know what’ll happen.”

Kevin rolled his eyes but gave a friendly smile. “Good luck man, I have a feeling you’ll need it on this case.”

As the pair stepped out of the building, walking to Kevin’s registered patrol car, Dwight nodded. “Yeah, I’m betting you’re right. Still though, get to be my age and you eventually see a fair few cases like this pop up, and almost always the truth behind them surprises ya.”

A purple pony ran across the street, panting and out of breath. She had no idea where she was or what those strange creatures she saw were.

She hold the bag she was carrying tightly to herself. She needed to find the Princess. She needed to find her friends.

As she ran out into the dark street, she saw a bright light heading towards her. She had no time to react when the car hit her, sending her sprawling to the ground.

“Oh shit I think you hit someone!”

“Fuck! Call 911! Fuck! They just ran in front of us! Oh fuck oh fuck..”

From behind the darkened corner of a building, the person chasing the mare frowned, stepping into hiding as he waited, patient for the next time he’d get his chance.

On May 25 2014, at 11:15am, an incredibly bizarre incident had occurred within a grocery store in New York City, where a young adult man inexplicably, and with little warning, transformed into what appeared to be an animated female pony with a pastel coloured mane, tail as well as their body in general. Soon, it became apparent this was not the first victim of the ‘virus’ as some called it, and the transformation spread to many people of varying ages, genders and walks of life, seemingly becoming an epidemic.

It was soon discovered that the victims were transforming into characters from a cartoon show that had gained a sizable following, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. The victims not only changed physically, but mentally as well, gaining the memories associated with their new bodies with their old lives completely forgotten. A therapeutic method was soon developed to help the victims regain their old memories and reintegrate into society, once it was proving that despite everything this wasn’t caused by a disease or a biological/chemical weapon. Thus, society would have to learn to accept these new forms of humans.

The cartoon show that seemingly was the base of the epidemic was shortly cancelled, at first out of fear it was the source of the epidemic, but eventually given the official explanation as being out of a sense of respect towards the victims.

As of today, six years since the affliction’s discovery, a small but significant portion of Americans, along with several other countries, are ponies, with modern science still attempting to determine the true cause of this occurrence as well as a potential cure towards it.

Until then, for the rest of the world, life goes on. �rs�]

Author's Note

Ponies are about half as tall as the average human height when able to stand upright, and all seem to have near identical body heights in general. While standing on all fours, as is typical for most, they stand about a foot or two taller than the largest breeds of dogs. Almost impossibly, they actually look like cartoon characters, seemingly out of place in reality.

The ‘affliction’, for lack of a better term of the condition, is not contagious and is not passed through any currently known methods, and rarely strikes those related by blood to the victims.

DNA tests of those afflicted do accurately pinpoint their real identity, which is extremely helpful in helping identify and treat people afflicted in cases where it’s impossible or difficult to ascertain their identity.

So far only ponies from the show have been sighted among the afflicted, but the possibility of some other species appearing or even an widely known ‘OC’ is thereotically possible. The possibility of Discord showing up is known as the ‘Discord Scenario’, with the procedure for should such an event occur are as follows:

1) Pray to god that the Discord Scenario never transpires

2) Should the Discord Scenario occur regardless, all hope is lost and you are given permission to deal with the potential crisis howsoever you decide based on your individual interpretation.

3) Try not to think about the possibility Discord Scenario occurring

Chapter 1: A Brave New World

A young brown colt with brown hair and a propeller beanie hat sat at a news desk as a camera recorded him.

“Our top story: notorious terrorist group ‘The Friends of Harmony’ have issued a statement to the President to step down and acknowledge the authority of the organisation’s leaders, the ponies known to the public only as ‘Princess Celestia’ and ‘Princess Luna’. The statement made no mention of the hostages the group had recently captured nor why the President should heed such a ludicrous demand. The president hosted a press conference to publicly answer the demand.”

A clip played of an elderly green coated mare with a white mane tied in a bun who stood behind a podium with two secret service agents standing at her sides, behind her a mock up of the American flag was raised behind her.

“The Friends of Harmony expect me to simply do as they say, thinking Ah can be persuaded to join their ‘cult’.” The mare said to a large crowd of reporters. “But Ah say NAY! I am President of this country, and as my forebears before me, Ah shall not give into the demands of terrorists! Return the people you have kidnapped to their families and cease your attempts to subvert the order of this great nation ours; you are not the heroes fighting a corrupt system! You are merely cowards and monsters if you think Ah’m just gonna roll over and let you have your way, you have another thing coming!”

The clip ended, returning to the colt at the news desk. “Police are still asking that witnesses who spotted suspicious behaviour from potential members of the group should stay safe, especially if they are ponies themselves, and to call local law enforcement. And to the terrorists who may be watching: please, realise what you’re doing is wrong and stop, you’re helping no one with your actions.”

H sighed and regained his composure as an inset of a filly with pink coat, pale purple and white hair and a diamond tiara on her head appeared in the top right corner of the screen. “In related news, suspected crimelord Zeke ‘Diamond’ Harder, seen here in his current pony form identified as ‘Diamond Tiara’, had once again stood trial for his suspected criminal activities...and once again, was voted by the jury as ‘not guilty’. Coinicidentally, and tragically, the presiding judge of the trial, who was recorded as calling Harder a ‘vile, repulsive man who surely deserves the chair’ was found dead 16 hours after the trial’s end, having apparently crashed into a park lake and drowned under suspicious circumstances. Police are still investigating.”

A jingle began to play as the colt shuffled some papers. “After the break, we head to the street and ask the average citizen their thoughts on the ponification condition on the eve of the sixth anniversary of the first sightings of the outbreak. This has been Suzanne Welker, Channel 15 News.”

Kevin Harris gripped his hooves firmly around the steering wheel as he drove along the streets of suburban New York, trying very hard not to wonder how he can grip something with hooves. One would think he’d just get used to it, but his human mind kept reminding him of his lack of fingers and opposable thumbs and how he by all rights shouldn’t be able to grip anything, let alone carry something or hold his gun in one hoof.

He put the car to a stop as he spied some young men standing threateningly around a young woman and a stallion pony.

“Hey babe!” One of the harassers said to the woman. “Why you walking with that filthy animal? You a Horsefucker, huh!? Is that it, bitch!? A fucking Horsefucker who needs some animal to get off!?”

“Leave us alone!” The stallion shouted angrily, he was a yellow coated earth pony with a brown mane.

“Noone asked you, Horseman!” One of the youths drew a nice...then cried out in pain as a truncheon was swung hard between his legs, causing him to collapse.

Kevin glared at the other two youths as the third struggled his feet while clutching his groin. “Alright break it up. I’m letting you off with a warning but if I ever see you three harass anyone else, I’m hauling you to the station!”

“Fuck off, bitch!” One of the young men swung a fist, only for Kevin to dodge it swiftly swing his truncheon into the elbow, making him scream in pain.

“I won’t warn you again.” The Pegasus growled threateningly. “I want you and your intolerant shithead friends OUT OF THIS SIDEWALK!”

The two injured youths got up to fight again, only for the uninjured one to grab them by the shoulders and drag them away till they were out of sight.

Kevin turned to see how the couple were doing after the ordeal...only to find they had already run off during the fight. He sighed and trotted to his car, continuing his drive home.

Much as he wanted to help that couple, he had to get going himself, he was already late as it was.

A person walked into the hospital, stepping to the front desk.

The nurse at the desk looked up at the person in question. “Can I help you?”

The person, a pretty female nurse with orange hair, smiled. “Yes, I was asked to give one of the new patients a quick look for the doctor in charge of her? She’s a purple unicorn pony, I think?”

“Oh right, yeah she’s lucky, good thing ponies are more resilient than normal people.” She handed the nurse a sheet of paper as well as directions and a room number. “We’ll need to see about identifying her soon, and the police have been notified.” A thought occurred to her. “Dr Smith didn’t really say anything about sending a nurse my way...”

She looked up but the other nurse was already gone.

Said nurse calmly walked along, reaching into her pocket to firmly hold onto a capped syringe...her hand briefly touching the knife beside it.

Kevin Harris pulled up in front of his house, parking his car in the driveway as he stepped out of the car and trotted back into his house, closing the front door behind him as he walked down the hallway to the lounge room where his wife, a woman with short brown hair and wearing a white T-shirt and a pair of jeans, sat playing a videogame on their LCD television.

The pegasus nuzzled against his wife’s side, who in turn reached a hand gently stroke his mane, pausing her game. “Welcome home, hon.”

Kevin smiled and leaned upwards, giving her a gentle kiss on the lips. “What’s for dinner tonight, Rachel?”

Rachel smirked and chuckled, shaking her head. “Ohhhh no, loverboy, it’s your day off, it’s YOUR turn to make dinner. Or were you hoping I forgot about that?”

“Pasta it is.” He looked around. “So where are the kids?”

Rachel looked past his shoulder. “Well, Monica’s here.”

Kevin blinked and turned, and saw a young 14 year old girl with long red hair styled in a ponytail peeking in from the edge of room’s entryway, before scuttling off and running upstairs to her room.

The blue Pegasus sighed softly to himself. “And what about Lock?”

“He should be on his way home from school in about an hour. And since Monica’s giving us the cold shoulder for now, I think we have some time to ourselves for a while.”

Kevin smiled at the love of his life, one of the people who helped him cling to his humanity so long ago...then frowned as he felt his phone buzz in his pocket. “Dammit, way to kill the mood....” He pulled the phone out of his pocket and put it to his ear. “Oh, hey what’s....now hold on, I’m on off duty, I just got home, you can’t just...alright, alright fine, if there’s no one else available I’ll handle this....” He ended the call and put his phone back in his pocket, frowning in annoyance. “It was work....”

Rachel folded her arms, looking at her husband evenly. “What happened?”

“An unregistered pony got caught up in a car accident, she’s currently in hospital.” He looked down. “They want me to head off and go see if they’re healed enough to be taken down for registration and identification. Apparently everyone else is swamped in other cases and work right now, I’m the only one available to get it done...” He sighed deeply, frowning in disappointment.

His wife frowned as well, but forced a wry smile. “Hey, I understand, don’t worry about it. It shouldn’t take too long to get that all sorted through, right? Just go, see how they are and follow procedure, and you should make it home quick enough to enjoy the rest of your off-time, right?”

Kevin smiled slightly. “You’re the best, hon.”

“Nah, just a good spouse.” She winked at him. “Go on; get going before the kids come home and I start regretting letting you be responsible.”

Kevin nodded and gave her a quick kiss before hesitantly turning and trotting out the door, thankful for having married her for the umpteenth time in his life.

A small yellow pegasus sat in a prison cell, quietly watching television, idly drawing a bluebird into a page of a notebook. “You really shouldn’t give me so much...”

“Look, the prison is simply giving you concessions for your good behaviour.” The guard said. “Honestly, it’s kinda boring keepin’ guard over ya, you don’t really need it.”

“Yes, but it’s nice to talk to someone, Trevor, even if I don’t deserve it.”

The guard sighed, knowing the prisoner well enough not to argue to say anything regarding that. “What are you watching anyway?”

“The news. I like keeping up on current events, it helps me keep track of the world outside these bars.” The pegasus smiled softly to herself. “I can pretend that I am normal, for just a little while.”

She frowned as there was loud noise, followed by Trevor walking off and then crying out in surprise. Following that, she heard foot...no, hoofsteps clopping over to her cell door, the door sliding open as an orange earth pony mare stood before her, a large brown Stetson on her head.

The mare grinned. “Don’t fret, sugarcube, help has arrived to getcha outta here!”

The pegasus frowned and shook her head. “I appreciate the effort, but no, I’ll stay here.”

“What are ya sayin’ Fluttershy!? It’s me, Applejack, Ah’m yer friend!”

“I am not Fluttershy.” The pegasus closed her eyes as tears fell down her cheeks. “I am a vile human being who deserves to be incarcerated in this cell for the rest of my life. Please, just leave me here and go home.”

“That’s jus’ them tryin’ ta brainwash ya or somethin’!” Applejack argued. “We’re gettin’ everypony home, especially you an’ the others!”

‘Fluttershy’ continued to keep her eyes closed, then opened them wide and gasped as a cloth covered her mouth, eyes fluttering as she quickly fell unconscious.

Applejack caught the pegasus in her hooves as several other ponies came into the cell. “Don’ worry sugarcube, we’re gettin’ ya out of this nightmare. All of us.”

A purple unicorn lay sleeping in a hospital bed as a nurse approached her, stealthily holding a syringe in her hand. The nurse kept her features calm and composed as she held reached out, the tip of the syringe inches from penetrating the soft, cartoon skin of the pony before her.

Twilight Sparkle’s eyes flung upon, horn glowing as she teleported a foot away from the nurse, eyes wide in fear, a hoof clutching something large to her chest as her magic fired a blast at the woman’s hand, destroying the syringe and its deadly contents. The unicorn teleported out through the door and started running down the hall, several doctors and nurses and some patients crying out in alarm as she ran past.

The nurse frowned, pulling the gun from out of her pocket, deciding subtlety had been thrown out the window, forcing her to act far more rashly and publicly then she would have liked.

However.

A doctor stepped into the room. “Are you alright? She didn’t hurt you did she?”

The doctor screamed as the nurse fired a bullet into his heart, and then into his forehead, silencing him as his corpse fell the floor.

The nurse silently stepped passed him and into the hall, gun held steady as she marched off, firing a shot at those unlucky enough to see her. Mentally, she recited something to herself.

No Princesses. No Heroes. No Elements. No Witnesses. cc����9

Author's Note

The Friends of Harmony are considered one of the most wanted groups in America, where they are at their most active. Despite having a low number of casualties to their name, they nevertheless have committed several crimes such as destruction of public property, assault, assault on an officer and most especially kidnapping. Made up of several ponies who refused to accept their humanity, the Friends of Harmony actively believe humanity is an enemy that took them from their ‘home’, and so their members most often kidnap ponies, particularly those who have undergone therapy, and try to ‘remind’ them of their ‘friendship’ and ‘true lives’.

Their leaders are Princess Luna and Princess Celestia, the latter being named ‘Public Enemy Number One’ due to the Hoover Dam Incident, where Celestia used her magic during an encounter between her group and the local law enforcement. This act caused several injuries, maiming and a small number of fatalities as a few people were sent flying back by a ‘force field’ into cars, concrete...and over the edge of the dam itself.

The Friends of Harmony are so named due to their first public statement that was aired on national television, wherein they were referred to as ‘Friends of Harmony’, decrying humanity as ‘Enemies of Friendship. Ever since then, the name has stuck.