Kinda Magical
by Shivered Timbers

(Prompt: It's just us together on our special movie night.)

Twilight giggled her way through the darkened theater, wings rustling as she tried again and again to unsuccessfully hush Rainbow Dash. Excitement stirred like lightning beneath her skin, and it was all she could do to keep herself from bursting out in boisterous laughter. They had compromised on their plan by agreeing to keep to the back rows, in a corner as far from other moviegoers as they could. As they picked their way through the velvet-covered retracting seats and their eyes adjusted to the darkness, she was pleased to see that there were only a few other patrons in the theater.

Good, she thought. It wouldn't be nearly as much fun if they'd been all alone.

"Over here, over here!" Rainbow hissed, nipping at her dock. Twilight had to bite down on her own hoof to keep from squealing as she plunked her rump down on the seat next to her marefriend. Their giggles quieted as they settled in, wings wrapping around one another.

They had come in time for the previews, she noticed as she looked up at the screen. The current one appeared to be advertising a family-friendly romp featuring cartoonish griffins singing about food.

"What movie did you pick, anyway?" she asked, voice hushed. She could feel Rainbow shrug next to her.

"Who cares?" The eye rolling was audible. "It's not like we're gonna watch it or anything."

Twilight snickered, biting her lower lip. "Once the movie starts, so do we."

Rainbow leaned in close and whispered into her ear. "You got it, Princess."

There was a bump against her as a heavyset stallion shoved his way around the seats and into the row in front of them. On his back was a bucket of popcorn nearly as large as he was, some of which spilled onto Twilight as he lowered his immensity into the seat in front of them. Nonplussed, she blew the errant kernels out of her mane and crossed her arms.

"Great," she groused, "what are we supposed to do about this?"

Rainbow hmm'd a moment, hoof tapping against the ground. The preview ended and the next one came on, detailing a heartwarming story about hoofball players fighting against impossible odds.

"I have an idea," she said at length. "Gimme a kiss."

Twilight was somewhat confused, but acceded, turning her head and meeting Rainbow Dash's mouth. Rainbow Dash began to noisily suck on her lips, making exaggerated slurping sounds and moaning passionately. Twilight's wings flared as she quickly got the hint, and added her own noises to the milieu.

The stallion in front of them cleared his throat, shifted in his seat, then finally stood, looking at them with beady, glowering eyes.

"Blergh," he snorted. "Disgraceful."

They watched, giggling anew, as he waddled his bulk a few rows deeper into the theater. Rainbow Dash, grinning, gave Twilight another kiss, then extended her hoof.

"A private area for your theater-going pleasure, m'lady."

Twilight snickered and shook the hoof gallantly. "Why thank you, Lady Rainbow. You are ever so kind."

"Ooh," Rainbow said, eyes turning toward the screen, "it's starting! Get ready!"

Twilight suppressed a naughty squeal, shuffling her wings back down as Rainbow Dash's head disappeared below the level of the seat. The production company's fanfare sounded as Twilight spread her legs and leaned back in the chair. She felt a hoof brush against her knee and quivered. Hot breath rushed out against her groin. She flicked her tail. The movie began.

Twilight stuck her fetlock in her mouth to keep the noise down. Rainbow Dash was nosing at her nethers now, and she closed her eyes, the tingle of contact setting jolts of electricity coursing through her body. Rainbow was very deliberate in her movements, first nose, then tongue, then her entire muzzle plunging inwards. She kept a maddeningly slow pace, very much unlike her, but intended to decrease the possible noise produced by sloppy...

"Ohh, Rainbow," Twilight murmured into her foreleg. Her wingtips vibrated, her tail thrashing against the floor. Rainbow kept a fierce grip on one of her legs, light slurping noises audible as she made sure that every inch of Twilight was getting attention. A particularly well-placed flick of the tongue sent Twilight's eyes opening suddenly.

Twilight was, at that moment, very aware that she was on camera.

Blinking, she leaned forward slightly, ignoring the muffled "Hey!" from between her thighs.

"Oh no..."

"Twilight, what gives?" Rainbow's voice was a harsh whisper.

Twilight sighed, placing both hooves against her eyes. "Do you remember that film thing I did like three months ago?"

"Yeah? What about it?"

Twilight motioned to the screen. Rainbow poked her head up above the back of the seat in front of her.

"Oh wow, you're totally in this movie, Twilight!" She snickered, then her expression soured. "Hey, they got doubles for the rest of us? What the hay? I totally would have been in this movie if they'd asked. That looks nothing like me!"

"Rainbow, keep it down!" Twilight glanced around the theater, noting that at least one mare was glaring at them from across the room. "If we don't finish this, Rarity's going to own both of us for a week!"

"Are you sure you can keep going if you're on screen like that?" Rainbow pouted at her.

"I'll... I'll try." Twilight swallowed. "I'll just keep my eyes closed. That should work!"

"Ooookay..."

Rainbow descended into the shadows once more. Twilight gave a nervous smile to the irritated mare on the other side of the theater, who turned back to the screen.

Twilight was then assaulted by Rainbow's tongue once more. Gasping, she tried desperately to keep a hold of the armrest and not moan too loudly. Her wings unfurled; she was thankful there was nopony behind her.

However, the one thing she could not do was close her eyes. And as she watched, her memories of performing against a green screen were filled in by magical movie trickery. Her face fell as she watched herself step into a mirror that in reality had just been a vertical hoop.

"Oh goddesses..."

"Would you keep it down?" Rainbow hissed. "And quit watching the movie!"

It was too late. Twilight was raptly attending the movie now, face contorting in various shades of horror and disgust as she beheld what happened after she had walked off the set, none the wiser as to her contribution.

"What kind of movie is this?"

"Shh!" It was the mare from before, glaring across the theater. Twilight ignored her.

"What is that thing? Where the heck did they find a creature that looks like that to act in this movie?" Twilight made a face. "Ugh, there's more of them? Why does that one have my hair? She doesn't even sound like me!"

"Twilight," Rainbow said, glowering, "seriously. Cut it out. Remember the bet!"

Twilight groaned, drawing a hoof down her face in exasperation. Rainbow shrugged and took that as a sign to continue, gripping Twilight around the waist and being far less concerned with quietness now. Twilight groused and harrumphed at the screen, eyes dilating and contracting alternately, her wings rustling irritably as she made gestures of exasperation at the movie.

"Why would you even... Oh, who cares about... Ugh, what is going on here?"

The large stallion in front of them made a sound like he was trying to dislodge a pile of rocks from his nasal passages and lumbered out of his seat, moving past them. Rainbow took advantage of the seat displacement to really press up into Twilight. Moans mixed in with her running critique of the movie.

"Why do I haAVE a boyfriend? This--nngh--this high school DRAma is total craOHH!"

Rainbow Dash redoubled her efforts. All she had to do was get her to come...

"The more I s-s-see of this, the moOOOOre I th--hahhh... The more I think this, nnf... This is the worst..."

"Miss?"

"The woORST--"

"Uh, M-Miss? Excuse me?"

Twilight arched her back, enveloping Rainbow Dash with her thighs as her wings flared, smacking against somepony standing nearby.

"Yes!" she cried. "It's the worst movie I've ever SEEN!" With a pained moan of delight, she sank back into her seat, much to Rainbow Dash's relief.

"Miss, I'm going to have to ask you to leave the theater."

Twilight's head lolled to the side, so that she could see the pale, pimply unicorn as he paled even more upon getting a good look at her face.

"Um... E-even if you're a Princess, I still, uh..."

"Get out!" yelled the mare from across the room. "Some of us are trying to watch this movie!"

"You should be ashamed," gruffed the stallion from earlier as he loomed behind the usher. "Coming in and disturbing a movie for kids this way!"

Twilight snorted and turned to look at him. "If this garbage is for kids, then what are you doing here?"

The stallion puffed up, harrumphing impotently. Twilight slid out of her seat, then hopped over the back.

"Anyway, this movie is lame and we're done here. C'mon, Rainbow."

Those watching were shocked to see the second mare emerge from between the seats, and continued to stare at them as they exited the theater. Rainbow trotted up next to Twilight, grinning from ear to ear.

"Hey, we totally won that bet though!"

Twilight snorted.

"The next time a two-bit producer comes around asking me to be in a movie, remind me to send him to the moon." She shook her head. "Equestria Girls. Have you ever heard of anything so ridiculous?"

Author's Note

Arr, no disrespect t' Equestria Girls, on account o' ain't nopony seen it yet. I just be makin' light o' the current situation in the fandom, 's all. Thank ye, Sexty Minute Ponies, fer supplyin' me wi' such a ripe prompt fer the writin'! Ha-harr!